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The Huron Expositor, 1983-06-29, Page 21it' 3uroii ;Qxposi1or— Slnce 1860, Serving the Community first Incorporating .Brussels Post founded 1872 12 Main St. 527-0240 Published at SEAFORTH, ONTARIO every Wednesday morning Susan White, Managing Editor s1.9"14'114'.' Jocelyn A. Shrler, Publish -Or Member Canadian Community Newspaper Association, Ontario Community Newspaper Association and Audit Bureau of Circulation A member of the Ontario Press Council Subscription rates: Canada $17.75 a year (In advance) outside Canada $50. a year (in advance) Single Copies - 50 cents each SEAFORTH, ONTARIO, JUNE 29, 1983 Second class mail registration number 0696 Optiettion We made it! Mini grads A place to cool off If you've been sitting around on hot summer evenings, complaining mildly that there isn't much to do in Seaforth, we've got a suggestion. The Lions Park, just at the eastern edge of town, is a lovely place to cool off, relax and watch the world go by. About fifty years of volunteer work by Lions Club members, plus a series of dedicated paid staff, have made it so'. And it must be terribly frustrating to those who are active in the club to learn that not everyone appreciates their hard work. What else are they to conclude from the fact that all but a couple of the many picnic tables once provided for the public at the park have been stolen? But they keep plugging away, running an annual fund raising campaign, working on events like the weekend's carnival. Perhaps it's time they heard from the majority who live here how much the Lions Park Is appreciated. You can get as active as you like at the Lions Park....swimming, playing ball, taking to the swings or slides....or you can just laze around, read a good book or watch others in the community in action. There's plenty of shade, green. green grass, a wading pool for paddlers (even adult ones) and there's usually a cool breeze. Despite the lack of picnic tables, you can bring your own blanket and picnic on the grass. There are fish to watch in Silver Creek where the Lions hope recent dredging will improve the water quality. The atmosphere is relaxing *and serene; even the traffic on nearby Highway 8 seems far away. The park, rightly identified in Seaforth's proposed recreation master plan as of very high quality, didn't just happen Hard work and money built and maintained it. More of both will be needed to keep it up. Seaforth doesn't have a parks department, unlike some other area municipalities. And while the Town takes responsibility for Victoria Park, we have the Optimists to thank for the rec grounds, the Agricultural Society for the fairgrounds and the Lions for that very nice place to spend a summer evening. Let's support them all with our dollars and our help. Let's appreciate and use the super facilities Seaforth has. Above all, let's thank the many commurt+ty volunteers, be they Lions, Optimists or any other group, for the places and programs they provide for the rest of us. - S.W. You are the centre Shown from the left la Lindsay Devereaux; top middle, Natasha Bell; top right, Christine Devereaux; bottom left, Brent Hildebrand; bottom right, Brad McWhinney. Photos by Wassink This generation of fathers is To me, the essence of a community newspaper is to be Her Majesty's permanent Loyal .Opposition Salmon and Coffee Shop. We must be the permanent opposition to all of the other power structures in the community, watching loyally to make sure they're playing fair. We're the salmon because we should always be going upstream, against the flow. ,When everyone says you should be hanged, we should look for reasons why you shouldn't. When everyone is admiring the emperor's new clothes, we should be asking around the pawn shops for news of his visits. We're the coffee shop because what they're talking about at coffee is what should be on the front page and what is on the front page should dominate the coffee shop conversation on publication day. It isn't easy. It's one thing for an anonymous editorial writer in a tower in the city to criticize someone he's never seen. It's quite another to tackle someone you see every day, do considerable business with, and whose children go to school with your children. It's hard, too, to visit the mother of a close friend to gather information and a photo to go with the story of his death in an accident. It's also challenging, exciting and rewarding. A community newspaper usually covers a society that is small enough for the human mind to comprehend. When I look at the town police budget, for example, I can say, "Oh yes, that's three cars and Danny and Cuffy and Donny and Billy...."1 can figure out whether the total is reasonable or not. A community newspaper publisher also has to become very knowledgeable about the economic bases of the community. Here that's the forest industry and fishing. Fortunately, it's easy to get to talk to the people who are involved. I have an editorial staff of seven in an audience area of about 55,000 people and 14,000 households. That's one reporter for every 8,000 people and 2,000 families. No paper in Toronto or New York would come close, Because we're close to our audience and they're close to each other, we're writing about people who know each other. That has led to exceptional circulation penetration and credibility for community newspapers and their advertisers. We won't run ads that promise you can make $1,000 a week stuffing envelopes at home. We and our advertisers have to face our readers and customers week after week. Without a reputation for truthfulness and fairness, we won't survive. At the age of eight, I started in this business washing individual letters of Inky type and sorting them back into the case. As a teenager, I spent eternities feeding four-page sheets one at a time into an old flat-bed press. My tools keep getting better and better. It's the same for the people in my community. They're doing fascinating things in the forests and on the waters and reading about each other in their paper. The essence of a community newspaper? Well, if you live here, we're the medium that thinks you are the centre of the universe. -David Cadogan is editor and publisher of the Miram icht Leader and Miramichi Weekend, and president of Cadogan Publishing, Newcastle, N B — from the Media Magazine, April 1983 Give the band a hand cr© t1J @df�op I know you were at the official opening of the Community Centres - and wasn't that really something! There were a lot of people pretty proud (and rightly so) of a job well done. Then there is the new fire hall, which is well on its way and next, a dump site. These, 1 am sure are all necessary to the town and community. However, did you ever see or hear anything more beautiful than the perform- ance of our S.D.H.S. Trumpet Band put on at the arena opening? They got a standing ovation, and there was hardly a dry eye when they came marching in and performed for IS or 20 minutes. it was breathtaking. We should, and I'm sure are, extremely proud of our girls and their fine leader t You likely took some time on a Sunday a couple of weeks ago to remember dear old dad. It was his day, after all, and most of us have fond memories of him. Or, if you have small children, maybe you spent part of the day explaining Father's Day and helping them make something special for their dad. And if you're of an age that is involved with both those generations of fathers, like 1 am, you might have had a thought about how fatherhood has changed in the last three decades. For the better 1 think. Given the choice, I'd rather be a father right now than a father in the days when child rearing was thought to be `totally mother's job. Because these 1980's fathers know their kids so much better than the fathers of my generation did. Although fairly recent statistics say the average American father spends 20 minutes a day with his child (thus coming far behind TV. little friends and mother as a presence) there's a lot of evidence that modern fathers get involved in their children's lives. Fathers aren't only that shadowy figure who hands out both the bucks and the swats to the scat of the pants. any more. DIAPERS Children today are lucky enough to have dads who change diapers. who can take full charge of the house if mother's elsewhere or "Charlie' He uow has over 80 girls, 1 am told (haven't attempted to count them though) but they are a credit to our town - just think of all that hard workl I have seen them perform in Florida twice. out in Calgary and many times in Ontario but never like right here at home. So. i have been wondering if this letter would not help to make the Band Booster Club stronger to help them on their next winter's trip to South Carolina which will be costly. But it is a great honor to be invited. Our hand is fast becoming well known as one of the "betters". Let's dig down a little and give them a hand: I'm sure not many will refuse and would like to help. i know 1 will. Thanks and congratulations to Charlie and his girls. Yours truly. Elva Ellis Io ocAhon© �v gay by ,Iggafili W @ fortunate because both parents choose to share the 50 -million small jobs that allow the whole family to function smoothly. Most dads of the 80's Were involved with their kids before birth too. Both parents participate in the majority of pre -natal classes that the Huron County Health Unit teaches these days. Dads who take an eager part in the conception and then ignore the rest of the nine months are becoming obsolete. Plenty of fathers were in the delivery room when their kids were born...a third to half of the births at Seaforth Community are witnessed by the newborn's dad. Fathers bathe babies, play with babies, enjoy babies. They aren't embarassed about pushing a baby carriage down the street. Seems hard to believe but that was considered "unmanly'in many circles not so many years ago. NOT THEIR FAULT That's the thing about the older generation of fathers. 1t certainly isn't their fault that they missed the closeness with, and the day-to-day responsibility for their children that contemporary tathers have. Roles were pretty rigid back in the fifties and those roles drew a line down the middle of life, saying to all the dads "earning a living is your job' and to all the moms "the kids and the house is yours'. People, women or men, who tried to do a little of both were wierd. And so kids grew up knowing dad had The Final Say. They were on good behavior for those few short hours he was able to spend at home but depended on mom for everything crucial in their little lives. The result of course was two overloaded parents; a mother worn down by the demands, and joys too. of life on the homefront and a father with both the burden and the stimulation of being the family's representative in the economic world. Fathers who are close to their families isn't quite such a modern phenomenon around here. If we grew up on a family farm, we saw dad all day long and we likely worked alongside him. If we lived in town, at least he was close enough to come home at noon. We're lucky, luckier than those who had commuter dads who got maybe an hour or two at home before the kids went to bed. The strict separation of fathers and homes started with industrial life and we in the country sidestepped it somewhat. Fathers could still pass on farming and small business skills to their kids in a way that just wasn't possible if dad worked in a factory or huge office building. PLAYING WITH KIDS In the more flexible 1980's, dads are deciding that playing with the kids can be more important than putting in a 60 hour week on the job. Career decisions are made with an eye to how the family will be affected not just to money and prestige. Dads, in short. are setting their own priorities, and being a force in the lives of the children they've produced is higher than it used to be. That of course helps moms who are no longer expected to be the sole care givers for the family. 24 hours a day. Children benefit as they understand that daddy too cares whether they register for swimming lessons or have clean socks for school. Bpt the big winner is dad. In touch with his family, in touch with himself, he's living a much fuller life. Brides: here's how to keep your man in line 'Ibis is June, the month when newspapers and women's magazines run articles giving advice to the June bride. Ironically, there isn't a woman alive who either needs or will take advice when it comes to keeping her man in line. But 1 know somebody who does so let's have a little advice for that neglected. rather pathetic figure, the June groom. First of all, young fellow, what ever made you do it? There you were, living at home eating Mom's great cooking, spending your money foolishly but for fun things, kicking up your heels a bit, and without a single worry in the world. You were in clover, boy. However, it's too late now, and 1 certainly wouldn't try to turn you away from the cliff. In fact, I'd hate to see any young fellow avoid such as enlightening education as marriage. But just as 1 wouldn't send a ten -year-old boy into the ring with the heavyweight champ of the world, 1 don't like to see you going into a battle that will last your whole fife with no weapons but your own dim wits. First thing you'd better do, after the ceremony is over, all the jokes smiled at, and all those dumb relatives of hers kissed and shaken by hand, is to let her know who's boss. When you start on your wedding trip, just have a quiet little talk with her. Don't get nasty, just be firm. When she stops crying and you stop apologizing, it will be all settled kigaQ ®nd opk@ 1n fact, it's not a bad idea to lock them right y by DEMO $t D@ / who is the boss. But don't allow a little setback like that to get you down. You didn't really want to be boss and have all that responsibility anyway. Next, try this. Tell her you think that people should get out by themselves once in a while, after they're married. if you've only been wearing the ball and chain for a month or so, she might even agree. Then you get crafty. "In that cake," you say, "you won't mind if 1 go over to Joe's on Friday night. His wife's away and he's having a few of the boys in for a round -table discussion on the merits of a full house as opposed to a straight." if she says, with a painful !grimace, no, she doesn't mind at all, she's Tying in her teeth. But never mind that. Go ahead and make your plans. Don't say another word about it until Friday night, however cool, the domestic atmosphere becomes. Get dressed for a poker party. Then. just before she bursts into tears say, "i was only kidding. Lambie. I'd rather go out with you." You may be lying in your teeth, but she'll be so flabbergasted and relieved that you'll have her eating out of your hand. For a week. When the first baby arrives, don't let her pull that "little mother needs her sleep" routine. Stand on your rights. Insist that she get up every other night to walk with the little squatter. whether .she likes it or not. She won't but you'll feel better about your token resistance. Another important requisite for a young husband is the ability to lie while looking her straight in the eye. Practise in the bathroom. Better still, ask any old husband for lessons. if she says, "When are you going to cut that lawn?" give her a very sincere look and reply, "Tomorrow night, lamb. It's too wet (or dry) right now." With any luck it'll be pouring rain tomorrow night or somebody will ask you out to dinner. Something else that will come to you almost automatically after a year or so of your sentence is served, is the ability to change the subject without seeming to. There's no particular set of rules about this. Just observe closely how your wife does it, and you'll soon become equally adroit when you don't like the direction the conversation is taking. Make it a point to hang up your clothes every night. not just sling them over a chair. up � Never. ever et the idea that our wife is above such a thing as going through your pockets. And before changing your clothes, make absolutely sure there is no incriminat- ing evidence in them, such as a book of matches with "Murphy's Bar and Massage Parlour" inscribed on it. 1 know that you wouldn't be caught dead in such a place, and that a friend gave you the matches, but she'll never believe it on a stack of Bibles. i remember one time my wife was away for a couple of days. When sfie came back. she found a match book with Park Plaza Lounge on it. To this day, 1 don't know where i got it, unless some fiend planted it on me, and to this day she swears I was having a rendezvous with an old flame. Speaking of old flames, avoid them as you would the bubonic plague. An old air force— friend of mine took his wife to England for their twenty-fifth anniversary treat. Met an old girl friend in a pub, introduced his wife, had some drinks, got a little too cosily reminiscent with the old flame. He has now been married 35 years, and his wife hasn't spoken to him in the last 10. Not a bad fate, really, but it does create problems. With these tew pointers dispensed, 1 can look with some equanimity on the procession to the slaughter -house. Above all, don't worry, young groom. The first 40 years are the worst. After that, it's a breeze. Let's have Main St. flowers while we're alive Ir© et @ ocIrrk Q "If you can't give me flowers while I'm alive to enjoy them, don't give me any when I'm dead." Is this the motto that our Town fathers are going by while taxes and wages keep climbing? Different industries have been turned down from coming into Seaforth which would help employ our youth and keep Seaforth a live town. The B.I.A. and the Horticultural Society, along with the differ- ent service clubs have been very instru- mental in keeping Seaforth alive, but one can't help notice volunteer work alone can't do it. People become creatures of habit and as long as they are willing to do, those in power expect them to keep doing. Wouldn't it be wonderful to keep a live town, a live police force (one who would walk an evening beat keeping eyes out for pranksters instead of , being creatures of habit that young folks know where their hang outs are so they have a free hand for destruction)? The flowers along Main Street will be missed and a big thank you to those who have in the past made it so nice. Not a Ghost Yet! For mistakes "You may notice some typograpnical errors in this paper. They were put there Intentionally. This paper tries to print something for everyone and some people are always looking for mistakes." Contributed