The Huron Expositor, 1984-10-17, Page 2SINCE 1880, SERVING THE COMMUNITY FIRST
' ° Incorporating BrUS oa Por
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SEAFORTH, ONTARIO
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JOCELYN A. SHRIEK, Publisher
„, RON WASSINK, Editor
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SiEAFORTH, ONTARIO, WEDNESDAY, OCTOBER' 17, 1984
Second class mall registration Number 0698
Co-operation is the key
Since the first recreation conference, sponsored by the. Seaforth
recreation department was held one year ago, more groups are finding
that co-operation is the key to success.
And that's at least one positive sign of the conference. There are over
50 groups, including arts and culture, recreation and church. Little more
than 30 groups turned out for the second annual conference. That's more
than last year, but a total commitment by all groups would make the
conference that much better and that much more successful.
The 60 delegates who did attend Saturday were the winners. They all
gained more knowledge on how to get more volunteers to join their
,,,group; how to run effective meetings; and how to use the media to their
,advantage. The new ideas they gained will be a benefit to their
organizations.
But for the recreation conference to really work, means 100 per cent
participation. The prime aim of the conference is to co-ordinate and get
groups to co-operate.
An example of that was the Winter Carnival earlier this year. At (east
four groups participated, to make the carnival one of the best yet. And
because of the combined effort of all those volunteers, their groups
benefitted. And the dividends they received proves that co-operation
works.
All too often, each organization is concerned about their own projects -
their own money raising events. Overlapping dates and perhaps too
many events have caused problems.
The truth of the matter is that we're all trying to raise money through
sponsoring such events. But the secret Is, people participation.
Money raised often goes to community betterment, whether It be new
hospital equipment, upgrading ball diamonds, or for a new washroom at
the Van Egmond House. But when there's no participation, there's no
profit and no equipment.
Perhaps a recent letter to the editor writer, who asked "Do we need a
doctor?", was rlght. Maybe we have too many families (events), and It's
time to combine some of those families, as was the case with the Winter
Carnival.
, . Tie Optimist Club, the first organizers of the carnival, took the lead by
asking'tormot-e particlpation."They proved It worked. And It could work
for others.
And that's what the recreation conference was all about — to keep
groups Informed and offer them a learning experience. Let's use some of
these ideas, examine past experiences—good and bad—put them all
together and stir.
We're bound to come up with a recipe to satisfy all appetites.
Co-operation, co-ordination and the recreation conference are a start.
Let's get together and really do a bang up job In money raising ventures
In the coming year. - R.W.
Sept. is a great month
SUGAR AND SPICE
by Bill Smiley
Despite the lousy weather, this was a great
Sept. for Canadian males.
That is. if you happened to be a
rocking -chair jock, a Monday morning
quarterback, or an armchair analyst of sports.
Everything came together, to the dismay of
the ladies. They happen to like game shows,
soap operas, or good. old-fashioned movies
that make you laugh and cry to the point
where you don't know which you are doing
with the tears running down.
It was the epitome of excellence for us old
-athletes We didn't make the big-time and
the big money because we skated on our
ankles, couldn't throw a wobbly pass twenty
feet. and we whiffed at the plate with the
count three and two and the winning run on
third base,
CFL heading for the Grey Cup. World
Series in the offing. Canada Cup in hockey.
with many a muttered curse about cheap
penalties against the Russians.
And sandwiched in between, some great
tennis, golf, Grand Prix races with guys doing
cartwheels in their dinky toy cars, American
football, which 1 abhor because of the
histrionics of the guys who score a touchdown
because of their histrionics,
And then, of course, Pope -watching. After
watching the Pope in action, it's going to be
difficult to get up for the Queen's visit.
The general result of all these sports
activities, for the chap with his gut hanging
over his belt, but fire within it, is a plethora of
uncut lawns, also unraked, undone chores,
unattended business, and unshaved whisk-
ers.
Wives became hewers of hamburg and
drawers of beer, in the good. old Canadian
tradition. Never mind that your favorite team
lost practically everything. You still felt your
heart thumping, almost dangerously, when
the Canadian team was tied by the
Americans, swamped by the Swedes, and
ruined by the Russkies. They were still "our
boys", and we still believe in miracles, which
is not a bad thing for a nation.
In our favor, we ignored the facts that the
Blue Jays couldn't have caught the Yankees
with a lasso and a couple of hig'ily-bred
quarter horses, that our hockey team, with no
less than twelve Grey-cuppers on it, would be
lucky to tie Italy. that the local Pee -wee team
lost 10-4 in their final game. We were right
there with them, cheering every boo-boo,
waxing wild With every hit, pass or goal.
One thing you trust say about Canadians.
We're good losers. We've learned to be.
I remember talking to a charming chap
from Montreal about eight years ago, on a
trip to Europe, "How come' 1 asked, "that
Montreal has a good football team (Les
Allouettes). a good baseball team (Expos)
and a great hockey team (Les Canadiens, in
their glory days), and Toronto has the worst
football team (Argos), worst baseball team
(Blue Jays) and almost worst hockey team
(Maple Leafs)?"
He assured me that it was only a matter of
time. He was right. Thanks to massive
injections of Americans, the Blue Jays and
Argos are respectable. the Maple Leafs still
fourth -rate.
That's enough about sports. I'm sure my
lady readers are bored silly. They are much
mare interested in the real things of life: who
had a baby, who died and why and how, when
is that grump going to get out of that chair
and stop watching that box, what'll i give him
(that's portable) for supper?
But then, thank goodness. came along
Pope -watching. This is almost as good as
watching the Queen, and a lot more
imt.a,,ant to many people than watching the
Queen. Also a lot more important to many
people than watching football or whatever.
1 could have been in the front row, if I'd
wanted to exaggerate my arthritic foot, get
some crutches, don some dark glasses and
hire a seeing -eye -dog. But 1 thought that
would be a bit much.
I could have gone to the big mass by driving
four miles from town and taken a shuttle bus,
and arrived the night before if i wanted
standing room. I thought that, too, would be a
bit much. Especially because it promised
rain. i can go there any day in the rain.
Heck with it. i'll watch it on TV, provided
there isn't an especially exciting game on TV,
which there won't be because the Papal Visit
seemed to have cornered the market on the
tube.
And no wonder. He is a man of terrific
presence, with a great sense of the dramatic,'
as befits a one-time actor, a dedication that
allows for no questions, and a feeling for the
poor and underprivileged that makes one, for
a few moments, at least, feel like a fat,
overprivileged slob.
At least the sports and the Pope' crowded
politics off the front pages. A matter of deep,
almost religious thanks.
Only thing 1 fault the Pope for is that he
didn't offer a special prayer for Team Canada
against the atheistic Russians. That would
have been a nice gesture, and he'd probably
have doubled his Canadian fold.
Nature study
USE YOUR SENSES—Debra Perkin, above,
shows students a breed of caterpillars found
In the Wawanosh Valley Conservation
Authority, while Wendy Ross, right, shows
another student how to Identify trees by
touch. (Mcllwraith photo)
Protection: sexual not poiitical
SENSE AND NONSENSE
by Ron Wassink
Ever wonder where the English language
got its start. 1'11 bet most people would like to
know, especially the young Russian couple
who were caught in a most embarrassing
situation, just because of the English
language.
1 m sure most Anglo-saxons have trouble
with the English language. 1 find I do. But
what about the people, for who English is a
second language. They must have one heck of
a time with all those words with double and
triple meanings and all that punctuation.
Take the Russian couple. They were
travelling abroad and were on a stop over in
Northern Ireland. In halting English, the
young man asked the cashier at the duty-free
shop for "protection".
At the mention of the word, protection, the
first thought of the cashier was -that couple
wanted to seek refugc.in _Ireland --that they
wanted to escape from Russia.
The young man and woman were whisked
off to police headquarters, but after 20
minutes of interrogation, officials deter-
mined it wasn't political protection the couple
was after, but sexual protection. They just
wanted some condoms.
But the couple couldn't get "protection".
In Roman Catholic Ireland, the sale of
condoms is forbidden except to married
couples, and then only with a doctor's
prescription.
Whether they like it or not, (and I'm not
talking warm weather), the English language
is a curse for many. They're going to their
home over there. Sounds confusing, doesn't
it?
Then we have a kind lady who enjoys any
kind of vegetable. But her son learned the sun
wasn't just a big star. But the movie star
disagreed. If they were asked, they wouldn't
know where it would end.
Enough is enough, already.
MI this talk about our confusing English
reminds me of a story a Dutch fella told me.
When he. first_ arrilted._in Canada. he .only.
knew a smattering of English. His new boss,
Canadian through and through, asked his
employee if he would like some grapefruit.
Now grapes and grapefruit are two
different fruit. but not to a hew Canadian who
loved grapes and thought grape fruit was just
that.
"He handed me this thing, looked like an
oversize orange. I didn't know what to do with
it, so I peeled it and ate it like an orange. It
was the most sour thing I ever had. And I
never did find a taste for grapefruit," said the
Ducthman.
Then there was the new Canadian who was
so proud of the way he could speak English.
He was the laughing stock of all fellow
employees.
How old are you?" they would often ask.
"I'm dirty, and my wife is dirty two," he
replied proudly.
I realize that was a low blow, but that's
what first time English speaking yisitors to
Canada are faced with.
Our language has grown from about 70,000
words in 1828 to more than 600,000 today.
Our language contains about 46 different
sounds, which is more than any other tongue.
And to express them, in 600,000 words, we
have an alaphabet of but 26 letters, which
makes English the craziest and most illogical
language to learn.
We've.got the -most incredible spelling in
the world. And the way we pronounce our
words makes learning our language the
despair of foreigners. Consider ail the ways
we pronounce words ending in "ough
count them! And the sounds of "th" and "w"
give a lot of foreigners trouble.
It's a crazy mess, but it's fascinating and
worth learning, right?
It's not easy to be a man
BEHIND THE SCENES
by Keith Roulston
These are not easy days to be a man, unless
perhaps you're in a monastery several
hundred miles from the nearest female.
There's a war going on out there between
the males and females, except that under the
acted rules of conducting our civilized
battle, only one side is allowed to fight. if
you're a man these days, you're supposed to
stand there and take the best shots women
have to fire at you and your brothers, 9'nd
smile and admit you deserve it.
it's not "politically correct" to point out
the silliness of some aspects of the women's
movement for instance. James Thurber. who
made a fortune off the battle of the sexes 40
years ago would starve today if he tried to
portray men as victims of women. Everybody
knows it's the women who have been victims
of a conspiracy among men for thousands of
years.
if you earn your living working with
women, your working hours have all the
dangers of walking through a mine field. One
wrong slip of the tongue, one wandering eye
and you're in danger of beirrj; branded a male
chauvinist. forever.
Don't, for instance, mention anything
about The 20 -Minute Workout, even if you
sweated along with the girls just this
morning. It will be assumed that you're really
a closet voyeur who probably rents porno
movies on the weekends and shouldn't be left
alone with little girls.
Come to think of it, best not say anything at
all that doesn't pertain exactly to the job. It
may seem a ntce idea to tease a female
co-worker or give her a soft whistle when
she's showing off that new mini -skirt, but you
may end up being a statistic in the latest
report on sexual harassment on the job.
For heavens sake be careful with your
hands. i know it was only a decade ago the
experts were telling us that Canadians were
too afraid of physical contact but forget all
they told you. Get too close to a woman at
work these days and you may end up before a
government agency.
Wear blinkers. No matter how revealing
the costume your fashionable co-workers
wear, don't notice what is revealed unless
you want to.be known as a dirty old man. (I
have yet to figure out why women want to
show it but get upset if men see it. But there
are many things I don't understand yet).
1 know you say you're innocent of these
things but you're just fooling yourself. The
feminist leaders will tell you that all males are
to blame for the guys who rape women, the
guys who beat their wives so badly that the
women become heros of television movies by
setting fire to the monster while he sleeps in
bed. Even if your female friends are more
moderate, they'll take it for granted that men
can't understand women.
There is one thing to take comfort in: this
too shall pass. Society seems to go on binges
every few years to discover a new oppressed
group. it goes totally overboard before
bringing some sanity back to the world.
Twenty years ago it was discrimination
against blacks. For a while, all whites shared
a common guilt because blacks discriminated
against in the southern States. Nobody ever
admitted that a black could be wrong
sometimes too. We in Canada. of course,
managed to get our own guilt by including
Japanese, Pakistanis, . Jews and North
American Indians.
There was just one difference. You didn't
have to look at a black across the breakfast
table every morning.
A good deal, it's free
COUNTRY CORNER
by Larry Dillon
My wife receives catalogues every couple
of weeks that have a specially personalized
cover. She's kept informed of the thousands
of dollars that she is about to receive free (as
soon as she fills out an order form, and of
course sends money).
Farmers don't pay for their hats. Every-
body knows that. They get them for free from
feed dealers, seed dealers, machinery
dealers and all those nice people from whorn
they buy.
We live in a wonderful society. Not only do
we have continual offers of free hats. we are
offered nearly everything we desire as gifts or
bonuses, subject to only a few minor
conditions.
A company from Toronto picked me out of
the 25 million citizens of this country for an
outstanding offer. They guaranteed to make
the a millionaire vritbin two years. All I had to
do was to pay $500 in installments while 1 took
their correspondence course. !couldn't loose.
They guaranteed it.
Their generosity was so overwhelming that
i decided to pay 550,000 instead. After all,
they were going to make me a millionaire. i
certainly wouldn't miss a measly five percent
of my first million. I immediately mailed a
letter telling them of my generous decision
and advising that 1 didn't have the 50,000
today. i said that i would take it out of the
million. It was guaranteed, so there was no
risk on their part.
'They never did answer my letter. i was a
little disappointed. Now it will probably take
me longer than the two years to become a
millionaire. But at least 1 will be able to keep
my $50,00u.
Another company offered me a free
computer if i would buy software from them.
One of their competitors offered me free
software if 1 would buy their computer. Gosh
wouldn't it be nice if we could take half of the
first company's offer and the rest from the
second company. That way both the compu-
ter and the software would be free.
Some stores give away free, with every
purchase, vouchers that can be used as part
of the purchase price on additional merchan-
dise. Sometimes they even sell their high
priced items interest free, for a limited
period, of course.
The offers we get are often so incredible
that it's unbelievable. Our family recently
received a flyer in the mail that qualified us
for a $100 discount on any of a variety of
packages worth $119. That company must
think that we are exceedingly gullible. it is
almost an insult to just be included on their
mailing list,
The catch to getting all these free items is
that we're paying for them. Companies
cannot give items away indefinitely. They
must make a profit or go out of business.
If we are receiving something "free", the
odds are that we are paying handsomely for it
in some manner. Those free items are often
paid for many times over by the business we
do with the companies that give them out.
The hats, jackets, vests, toy tractors and
other gifts are usually paid fbr out of our
initial purchases. If anyone gets something
for nothing, it's not usually the customer. We
end up doing free advertising for the dealers
by displaying their logos on the hats we wear.