The Wingham Advance, 1909-06-24, Page 3The Confessions,.
of a Debutante.
"So I lookperfeetlY 1ideeme2"
Kitty, sieneing up at ziae. anxiously.
"Oli, shouldn't KW that." Weline
deineeittlaglY, as I noted liar *tiff eati
hat. eammen. tieuee !vote, eiul Plain Iltt
tailored emelt.
"U f Pouree, YOU elimildn't say
pitted Kitty with 4 touch of disaPP‘do
Meet iti bet' votee, "but you think lt,
yen?"
agreed tOnipromiaingly, "Ye
ste look rethee-rether dieferent. Ther
latet anY Powder olt eour peso, nor all
rustle to your its, nor a single 11U1 1
Ar Pomeesiour; anti yen don't /smell 0
violete. nor eere qulte lrappY, IMO -there
Is!" 1 exelaineed eutitieuly.
"Teere what la?" osked Kittywith.
slaile o satisfection,
"Your dimple," I exal1a1n04.
"Oh, that," suld Katy, rubbing her of
tending cheek with a little frown. "I wis
I could leave that oft, too," elle ;ultled wit
4 sigh.
"What on earth have you been doiug?"
demanded.
"It isn't what I've been dolag," quot
KIttY sweinntly, "but what I'm going to
that -teat le tbe !natter. I'M going_ to oil
op my mother-enslaw, Mrs. ,Citektie" ell
04,40d. •turning aolensuly upon me,
'Your -what?"
"A woman who *was a son," explaine
Kitty,
"lett her son isn't your--," 1 began
auicklve
"No, he isn't Mine," Teopondod Kitty
frankly, "and he never will be: But she'
it 'Mother-in-law' In the moat ,Inirrowin
eenee of the word. Every mother of ever
BOA is a 'mother -le -law' to every.girl who -
"Who looks at him?" 1 suggested.
"Whom be loolte at," cerrected
"She's the mother -In-law 'before taking!
and, lige inedieine, %Mere taking,' she's
much worse than after you've =Meowed
the doe and gotten it down. Did you ever
see a matt ea depraved and homely and un-
attritattve and uninteresting that les nether
didn't Mercy that every woman he plot
wanted to marry Min and didn't hate her
for it instead of -of 'thanking her?" aud
Kitty severely pushed beck an obstrepevous
curl tbat crept from under the sailor kat
and hung down over one ear. "It's the
mothers of ineu," she went on, waikhag
rapidly, "who .prevent ell the happy maks
riages and make all the stupid, grottchY oha
baehelor,s and are at the bottcen of all tlifY
silly runaway matelies •aryl of most of the.
matrimonial misery in this wor1d/4' _and
Kitty's heels clicked angrily as she hurried
down the avenue,
"You," I remarked, lifting my eyebrows
accusingly, "seem to have had an unusual
amount of experience! for--"
"No," interrupted Kitty, jingling her
chatelaine impatiently, "only the, usual
amount -the amount that every girl has who
hasn't a hump or a squint. And he n%nro
charming and popular and eligible it girl is
the more agonizing her experience- and elle
more desperately she is fought toed frozen
and snubbed by the embryo nuetherse1e-
1aw. It's a battle to the knife fort a realey
fascinating young .womae to get a „husband\
in these days!" and Kitty sighed Mourn- '
fully.
"Qh, well." 1 remarked cheerfully, "we've
^got to be protected some way. It's the nat-
ural provision of Providenee----"
"Providence didn't give woman a son,"
retorted Kitty, "as it gave her e, nose or it
I ingers-to be attached to her through lite.
But 6110 luvariabiy thinks it did. And she
looks upon every fairly atteactive girl as
a thief or it bird of prey, i'ready to pounce
upon ber 'treasure.' Every".time I meet the
zuother of an uumarried men I feel as if I
were on trial for my life, send it makes me
so self-c,onsciaus one rebeillious that it sim-
ply drives me t� -to do thievs."
"Kitty Glenn!" I exclaimbe, ,reproitobfullYs
"To do wbat things?"
"Well," said Kitty, twisting her chate-
laine and looking the other, way, "to sit in
the conservatory longer thim, I should and
to say things I shouldn't,and don't mean
mad -and, oh, you know ho w a wrongfully
convicted crew:Lel feels1")
"I can't my I do." I remarked, coldly.
'He feels," said Kitty, "as if he might
lust as, .well eat the eakei 48 is accused of
etealing."
"011 I" I exelairaed. "leihen that is wbY
wbeu lay mother is around, you are always
so---.'
"rm not," Cried Kitts; reddening.
P
"Don't you dare say it,. Mr. Curtis."
"so particularly fascinating," I finished.
"Ah, well! There's eometheng on the mother-
in-law side after all."
"There's nothing on ber nide," retorted
Kitty defiantly, "but :pure, unadulterated
selfishness. It isn't her love for her on
.that prompts her to keep him away from
eke girt he wants, It's her love for herself
:and the fear that some other woman win
!profit by tier handiwork. She forgets that
'eh e .bereelt profited by another woman's
!handiwork whets she married her husband.
:She forgets all that She endured at the
hands of that other woman before she got
that husband. She forgets that her son is
!human and that his happiness is at stake,
'Not at all!" I obJeoted. "That's jut
what sheeteraembers that he is human -too
human -and That fits happiness depends upon
eluding the right girl, and----"
"Tbere isn't any right girl!" declared
Kitt*.
"What!"
""Not in the eyes or it Man's mother.
Cleopatra herself -wouldn't •be beautiful
enotig, nor the Queen of Sheba rich enough,
nor saint Ceellia good etough for the mean-
est, smallest, most miserable specimen of
manhood a mother ever therished.
name might be Smith and his income $10 a
week, his chief feature it bump, his only
talent a talent for amusing himself: but
you couldn't convince his mother thee any
.girl, who, out of sheer pity dances with
Mita or allow,s him to call, isn't a sieen try -
liege to lure him from his happy home. And
ig
.1
to
5
a
he worst of it all is that it is the right
irl she breaks him off front every time."
"Noneensel" I declared. "Nobody on
twee can break a man off from the girl he
eves, unlese—"
"NO." rejoined Kitty, scathingly, "but a
etermined mother can Make it so unplea.s-
at for that girl that tbe girl will break
t eff herself if she has an ounce of pride.
seed, besides, no man's Mother ever waited
ong enough for her eon to fell in love be -
ore !beginning to 'smother -in -lame She
akee time by the forelock and her am by
he coattails the moment he Is old enough
o enter a baII room or to feel a glimmer
f interest in the opensIte sex. She can
cent a love affair or it flirtation as quickly
it a hunting dog does a rabbit, The sight
f
it ;peaty girl's photograph on her son's
ressing table sends ber Into paroxysms of
right. Every Mae she kisses him, she
snifts at his coat lapels in mortal fear that
he -will detect the odor of violets or peen
'Eariagne. She watches the clock and lis -
ens for his footsteps whenever he stays
tit after half -past ten, She drives him to
Ubtertuges 'and lies by her eternal cities -
Belittles, 401(1 3141111$ him against 'desliading'
wornea, until he sutelders at Ile tionigist of
nuttrIniony. She reuumbers ell the little
tricks elle practiced weeu elle herself was
young an4explains them to laitu in their
most revolting details, Mail be being tO
look upoa femininity as lte,would upon cold
Polson. Somehow, the little gods *lily know
how. the snoreent he stops cane% promisee-
ouslY anti cuts the list la his engagenuat
book down to one address, she fiat's It out,
and from that moment gibe regards her sea
asi deemed man, the victim at a mabelous,
designing, =homing woman,"
"Sue" I proteeted, "If you. aren'tis,!l-
"1 beg
eu yo,!1 envince Ler, or. eropltiato
ao Mon, Str. Curtis!"
vA 'eat nay designs," I continued,.
her. or—
"ocesai you convince a limey commissioe
that you weren't Insane by .signing an affi-
davit to teat effect? " Inquired stitty bit-
terly. "could yess convince a Judge Oust
you weren't guilty of theft With the Stoleu
goods at your heels? Could you propitiate
11OneeS WbOSo vub had followed you out
of the jungle? Whatever you do you Con-
vict yourself. Snub the man, aud his mother
will declare you aro only trying to whet
his pessioe by IntUfference, or that yoe 043
hurt because be isn't more attentive, Be
pleasant to him, and ree will yew you aro
pursuleg him. Try to make her love yete
and you will end .by malting her hate 700
and talk ebout Yea as 'that evonme who at-
tempted to entinare my son by making me
safe 'pillows and sending me flowers,'
t101,e her, and she will think YOU nre grata
of her. Isight her openly, and she will tear
Your good nanie to tatters, Ile Charming,
and she will dub you ',testi' sweet, and she
Will pall you 'Instpidr clever, and she will
say yeti 'know too much' in a tone that will
make cold shudder e run up aud down eer
eon's /mine, And then, when see has driven
you to desperation or to throwing the inau
over. she will put liar arms tenderly round
his neck and soothingly -assure him that
she ;always knew Yon Wero 'Qat kiror ef
wow? and 'warned' him agalust you, any.
how.'
"Wile-eewl" I exclaimed. "And I never
realized—"
"Of course you didn't!" broke in Kitty.
"No man ever realizes until too late -until
hie mother has managed to separate him
from every nice, wholesome, aelf-reepectiug
girl who might have inede him balmy, or
.1
"Perfectly wretelied," I sugges rd.
"And until he has become a gr.nichy old
bachelor," continued Kitty, ,spitefully, "or
In a mad fit of revolt has run away with
the cook or it chorus girl or some creature
depraved enough to -to fight the embryo
mother-in-law with her own weapons, ana
then -and then—"
"There's the devil to pay!" I said end-.
deringly.
"And everybody Is beautifully miserable,
and the Inother-In-law rails at Providence
In 000 breath mid cries triupinhantly in the
next 'I told you sol'" finished Kitty, wav-
ing her chatelaine drametleany.
"New I underatandi" I exclaimed, turning
on Kitty with •a look of enlightenment,
"Understand what?" inquired Kitty, look.
sing u Itt mo in surprise through the re-
sfractory curl.
"Why my mother hates you eo."
"Does she?" gurgled Kitty deliglitedly.
"She calls you 'That woman,' " I exe
"How nice!" cried Kitty.
"And 'warns' me against you." •
'Teti"
"A.nd when a man's mother hates you,"
I :proceeded, "It's a sure sign—"
"Well?" ICItty smiled encouragingly.
"That the man--"
"Doesn't?" broke in Kitty
"Loves you." I said softly.
"I don't believe in signs," said Kitty,
with a toss ef her bead. "And, besides, I
have made up nay
"Already?" I asked in astonishment.
"To marry—"
"What!"
"A nice lone orphan.," said Kitty, as she
turned, suddenly into a side street and
mounted a flight of brown stone asps.
"Kitty!" 1 cried. "This is my house. 'You
aren't going in—"
"I am going," said Kitty, "to call on your
mother."
"Then my mother is your---"
"I didn't say so!" cried Kitty, turning
rosy to her ears. -
"Kitty!" I whispered softly, "I could al-
most kiss--,-"
"How dare you, Mr. Curtis!"
"My mother," I finished, virtuouslY.
Timmer nowLANO,
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THE CAUTIOUS BOY EXPLAINS.
They say that I'm it coward,
And this is 'zactly why o-
TausesI won't stand a-holdin'
A. lighted firefly.
It isn't that I'm frightened
At them, you understand;
But se'posin' it should burn me -
Then I might lost my hand.
The Modesty of Mary,
Mistress -Why, Mary, this figure of
l'renus is covered. with/dust:
Maid-Yes'm.
Mistrese-Didn't I tell you to -brush its
off?
Mistress -And -why• didn't you?
Maid (bluehing)-13ectsuse, mem, *I
thoeght it needed something on it.
Pieasant for Both.
I Near Sighted Guest (at banquet)--/
I presume the next thing will be a long
1 and tiresome speech from some talkative
1 guy.
I Man Sitting Next -0, suppose so.
I'm the talkative guy that has to make
the speech.
Shines like the sun, is waterproof
and permanent. Peeds and preserves
the finest leather. Will not soil the
daintiest garments.
No other evdti half as good.
1.0c. gild 28c, Ties t
coRN's CURED
„ — OIN g4 HCIURS
4'04 sein peinlessly remove auy ourii, either
herd, mit or bleeding, Ly applying Putstama
oorts Extractor. It never burns, leaves uo sears
containe o tickle; is hennless because ompos est
only of hetteng gums and balms. Fifty years in
use. Cure guaranteed. field by all aruggists
SM. bottles, Wrests stubstautt s
PUTNAM'S PAINLESS
- CORN EXTRACTOR
LOCKJAW,
The Deadly Disease and How lt
Destroys Lire,
Did you know that sinee the introdue-
Thlit of tIse toy pistol end giant cracker
the number of lives sacrificed yearly in
the celebratioo of the Youth of duly
haa averaged About four, Intrulred, the
greateet mettelity belga from fireworka
used oil the Fourth in 1003, -when the
number tabulated by the journal of the
American Medical Assoeiation wee lour
hundred and sixty-six, of which three
nundred and sixty-tbree were from tet-
anus caused by thy eletols?
When lockjaw, or tetanus, is about to
develop, the wound from which the in-
fection less come end which has prob-
ably been Weis% gets irritable, red end
tender, and s!stois shoot up the nerves
toward the spine. The first evidence of
the seizure is nearly always in the nerves
widen control the muscles in grinding
food and the jams become, rigidly closed;
hence the name given to the disease.
The inumies of the throat beeome so sen-
sitive that they resist the passing ef
food, making it painful end difficult to
swallow. The muscles oe the face take
a fixed position'with lips retracted ex-
posing the teals; the brow is wrinkled
and the eyes Slave, giviog the counte-
nance a mixed 4xp1'ession of anguish and
laughter, producing the "sardonic" ex-
preasion peculiar to tetanus. The rigidi-
ty of the muscles next extends to the
body and its extremities and the victim
becomes helpless stiffened. Often the
monies of the bskelt are drawn so tense
that the body is bent like a bow, resting
on the head and heels. Less frequently
it is bent forward or to oue side. In the
beginning of the attack the rigidity is
not constents and does not affect all the
groups of =Saes equally, and may pass
from one to another group. with inter-
vals of complete relaxation.
But the spasms beeome more fre-
quent and severe and aro presently ex-
cited by the slightest muscular effort.
So exquisitely excitable are the nerves
that a mere touch, a current of air, the
reflection of light from any bright ob-
ject, will bring on it sudden spasm in all
the museles ordinarily coutrolled by the
will; the face is horribly distorted, the
spine bent, and the hands violeutly
clinched and drawn up. So severe is the
contraction that muscles are sometimes
torn in two, During the convulsion
there is it severe pain through the stom-
ach and back, Immediately following
the maximum of the paroxysm, the
breathing becomes onsier and a little
fluid may be taken through 0. tube.
Unfortunately the mind of the sufferer
is clear 'anil his sense acute during the
attaeks. Profuse sweats occurs.and the
voice is dry, guttural and, at tunes, he
intelligible. Owing to the severe activi-
ty of the muscles, lockjaw causes the
highest fever ever seee, and the body
temperature sometimes rises for an hour
or two after death. Filially the boy,
your boy, sinks from exhaustion or a
severe paroxysm arrest a the breathing
and death terminates the disease which
has the worst terrors of meningitis,
strychnine poisoning and nydrophobia,
causing an agony hardly to be•surpassed
by the tortures of et martyrdom, and it
disteess to the helpless bystander which
is umneasurable in words. -From "The
Deodly Toy Pistol," in July Technical
World Magazine.
4.,
Where Do the ma Things Go?
People kept old -Utilises a. generation
ago because they still had thne to keep
them They kept them becauee they
bad time to mime the sentiments that
come of the sense of association -which
geese made them want to keep them.
Modern lives have no attics, any more
than modem houses. They haven't
the spaee to spare. They don't keep
old, diarie,s on their own 50001301, 1101`
old letters, ribbons, trinket, photo-
graphes on ..their friensle'. amount.
Especiall not old photograpbs. Friends
last longest to the really modern person
when they are of the type whose various
metamorphoses, no Wise vise on, are
of the rapid and painless sorts and Wale,
through all changes, keep abreast with
the hour, Why, then, pbotegrapba,
or aner ether memorial, of periods an.
tecedeet to the .netual moment -
periodis when yonr friend, wes it differ-
ent being, and so were you?
But where do all the old things go?
They cannot all tightly float into the
waste paper basket, along with the
pretty dross of menus and cotilliou
fevers semiesesitimentally preseeved for
half a eesen. Aill iteeriftlyTiMroli,34
know- tbat sinee the poor have -seen
growing richer it is 101101) more diffieult
to give away ald things "advantageous-
ly"ineaning old elothes saspeeitt/ly. -Some
of tis, I am sure, weer elothe.s indeed
of which We feel that our eervanta would
not approve for themselves IS the key
to the mystery to be found in that vast
eubterranean businesa (it must be vast,
sinee we are told that millions are in-
vested in it) Vbich'acts as an intermed-
iary between what some want to east off
and Otheire Wart to acquire? And. who
aro the people who mall to the settee of
old elothee? From what Ogee. ot elasaes
does lie recruit the upper elements of
lite trade? ITas our haste to be free
of all perishable amuseulatione per-
ceptibly enlarged an induatry wideli,
after all is 111 the hands eldefly of a race
whesse refissel to mix the thins% of sen-
timent with material thinge le one of
its great /swore? Why not the Com-
mercial spirit alma 01, things. eince
we donne to be inulnly eentimental
any more about our pose pluseae in
general?
From. "Tile Point of View," in the
llny Scribner.
-4 *4
* CONMIt1310.
Why is a man who has »oiling tie
boaet of but Ilie aueestore like a pelato
plant? The beet thing belonging Iti Min
is undergrounds
Why didn't the deg want to get into
the Ark? liesetuae he has a berk of his
own.
AVhat was it that was 01117 four woke
old when „edam WAS a boy and not five
weeks slid when be wail ss 111.1111? The
moon.
•• What bappenea to the ish•ea girl who
put kerosene on tin' fire? Ste hasn't
benzine shim.
IViiat givee mere milk than a cowl
A
31331k eart. Smelliest' 1 f have you
heard of tile stimese ease of tIte Bostoe
baby Lams nroisght op elephatten
willo CV.tA the eteplistet'e
Wits; k Preeitnnt Ito eeselt lihe "Ano
s (Ilea"? Beeaute lie is the natiotal him
ttesettna.
(1 1SAtPfl
Standing on His Rights
IPolice Justice Ileac yott any way 0
making it Helms?
' N'agrants-1. hey, y'r honor, I kin make
torooms." .,,
Pollee justice --you eau? Where did
sou learn that trede?
Vagrunt-I decline 1' answer, y'r
honor,
Time.
"It's sert o' eutioute" seta 'Coyle Jerry
Peebles; "but wheu 111111311 is workie' for
another man bete alweys wantin' to ge-
•tout see the ball gatne. When Ite's work-
in' on his own time he gets stingy with
it and twat spare it."
Naturally.
"1 ant sorry, my sou, if your studies
worry you, Do the best you ean, 013(1
let it go at that;
"But at tha foot of the etas?,
mother-thaVe where the 4soe pinches."
Fatal Oversight.
Arhillea ha(1 diseoveed that he was
vulnerable in his right heel,
"It's nothing," he said, "PR pickle
that before I go into action."
But he put it off too long, stud, Parte
oue day shot au arrow into it,
—set
With Apologies
The ceotipede nas a hundred legs,
Tbe trippled vag but one;
But when, the vag ,stumps out and begs
He has the other sktui.
• ,--- -
Among Girls.
"I wish 1 Were a man."
"Why?"
"On, bemuse."
"You might at least think up it man's
reaeon.".-Louisville Courier-Jourual,
Wayside Com mun ings,
A,dant Zapple-"Wot's . the hardest
wok ye ever done?"
Esau Pliague-"Digesthe it young
wife's fust plum puddire."
His Experience. ^
Curious Ilystender-When you are
once up in the air I presume you can
keep going as long as your gas holds
out,
lialloouise-No-no; not exactly. I can
keep going as long as the gas holds in.
A Good Reason.
"I shall never marry that man as long
as I live!"
"Why not?"
"I have just learned that he is goings
to marry some one else."
Unfavorable.
"I don't think that young lady you
introduced me to likes me."
"What makes you think so?"
"She didn't say that I reminded her
of soinebotly she knows."
Not Yet, But Sometime.
Man From the City -You, intend to
keep bees, I suppose.
Subarbanite-eSome day, perhaps. At
present we are devoting our entire ener-
gies to. keeping it cbok.
•
Discordant Note.
"Mr. Meekun, don't you think a WO -
man should receive it man's pay when
she does it man's work"
"Why-er-look at the other side of
the question a moment, will you. Think
how many men are doing women's work
ana not getting a cent for it:"
Disapproves.
"I always had a high opinion of Mr.
Roosevelt," said Mrs, Ita.psling, "until
110 weet to Africa, to kill animals, I
don't like that one bit, even if be does
himself a fawning naturalist.
The Fan. •
Deily he reads
• These worda with pain: I
"No game to -day -
Wet grounds aud rain,"
Complete Trousseau.
Stella -Have you got your going away
gowo?
Bella -Yes, and a going home to
smother gown. -New York Sun.
Rutting ft Up to Her.
Self -Possessed Young. Woman -Geoff-
rey, you have been corning to see me for
snore than it year. Don't you thistle it's
MADE
WELL AND
ST ONG
By Lydia E. Pinkham's
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Dovedale, Sask.-" I was a sufferer
from f e male weakness - monthly
periods irregular
and painful and a
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backache_ and
wretched head-
ache, and had felt
weak eversince the
birth of my twins.
I tried doctors but
got no relief. I be-
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Pinkham's,Veg-
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and after three
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-Mrs. litssm 13 rx, Dovedale, Sask.,
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Another Woman Cured.
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Corned Beef
Pork and Beans
Evaporated Milk
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Have a supply of
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Libby, McNeill & Libby I
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A
time to tell me what your intentions
fleet
Basnita Youth -Why, Miriam, I was
in hopes you'd suspect what my inten-
tionare by this time.
••••••••••••••-•—•
Those Foolish Questions.
"Our train hit a, bear on the way
down."
"Was the bear on the track?"
"No; the -train. had to go into the
woods after him."-- Louisville Courier -
journal.
It's a Toss -Up.
Hicks -My wife never says, wr told
you, so," when my plans go wrong .
Wicks -By Jove, she's a treasure. I
Hicks -She merely remarks, "Didn't
I say so?" -Boston Transcript
Give Her Time.
Him-C-oula you learn to love me 10
thne
Her -Perhaps. Ca11 toenorrow night,
will you, Charlie ?-01eveland Leader.
• Cynical,
"The law, you know, presumes that
every man is innocent unless Ise has
been proved to be guilty."
"Yes; I sometimes think the law has-
n't any more sense than the average
jury."
An Expert Opinion.
"Maria, is therea eiugle good thing
about these great wide hats the Women
are wearing"
"Yes, John, there is; when two wo-
men meet they can't kiss each other
now."
Looking Up.
-
.Stranger -Any improvements going
on in your village?
Uncle Welby Cosh -Improvements?
Thee ain't nothin' else gain' on here
but improvements, mister. We're layin'
plans every minute fur a Greater
Drearylsurst!
Suspicious Circumstanee.
"Do ,you know they suspect that old
man of leading a double life?"
"What gives rise *that?" .
"Why, he's so mean and cross around
home that they think he must be pleas-
ant and. agreeable somewhere,"
Leads Them All.
Teaeher-Who is the greatest inven-
tor?
Shaggy Irstired Pupil -Pat. Pendieg, 1.
guess. I see his name on more inven-
tions than 1 do on any other man's.
e • •
HIS ITALIAN TOUR,
The Bridge Friend Sneaks.
The ttip across was rat5r slow;
I recollect the boat rolled so,
Really, we were seareely able
To keep cards upon the table.
Xaples? Like fools we showed our
An'tt
And lipda.ctkos pay g eustom tax.
The light was s000r at the hotel -
One couldn't see the dummy well.
I dein remember Rome. 011, yes,
That's where I took that Club finesse
When playing with Lord Whet's-hiss
IMMO;
It saved., two Weiss and won the game,
Florence was megvellous. 'Twas there
I held that rombinatiort rare,
One 'hundred nem, in my hand;
It was my deal -I made a "Grand."
The railreads Say, don't talk to Ole
Of railroading lis Italy!
It'S quite impassible to play;
You run through tunnels all the way.
Venice is nice' -but design you, knew,
The ear& all stick together so.
At Genoa we took the ship
And ended our Italian trip.
Travel, of eouree, improves the snid,'
lint, just the same, 1 am inclined
To think you find as many dubs
Playing abroad as in our elnbs.
Waiter Trumbull in June Smart SeL
. .
AFRAID Ot` THE LADIES' . its
((halt Reporter.)
Important Politieal Ite)13: Williams
Lyini Mackenzie Xing. Minister tif La -
Loa is a Weisel/1r, Will some one please
throw i;rutecting will *Mind the
events ulait7
LARGER MILK
YIELDS ARE POSSIBLE
Dominutne eliPrayDbionCow
rin
terinstofoAgrit'ul.
t .
Testing Associations.
Wily should COW testing' be carried
on? Mainly bemuse iudivisluel Owe in
the same herd are likely to vary in pos
ductless about as muelt as, aoluetinino
mat& more than, individuai cove in dif-
terent breeds. Then too onset be coneld-
erea the strange variatione in milk and
fat from (ley to daY, even with a rOW
handled tia carefully as possible. Suell
variatious ere very ept to be overlooked
unless the record is carefully kept. An-
other point: Two poWs side esy side, one
gives gO lbs. milk a day, or 10-11), af
a milking, the other gives 0 lbs. The
differeuee in weight, or the difference
in bulk in the pail, espeeially if there
is a lot of froth ou top, is not easily
gauged by the ordinary milker. Pet
multiply that by the no days of a snak-
ing period, sold it is men that one cow
„glares 600 lbs. more milk then the other.
Yet the ordinary milker would have
said, these two cows give "just about"'
the same. But is uot the extra 600 lbs.
worth having? Many members of the
cow testing associetions say that the hir-
ed man milks better, with more endea-
vor to milk clean, if the record hangs
before hita constantly, and an extra
600 lb, per cow has often been obtained
since the introduction of the pencil and
ruled sheet. Try it, n,ot simply for the
extra milk or fat, but for the immense
personal eatisfaction in knowing that
eaoh cow is being made to do better, to
do hey best,
C. F. NV,
IN THE BRITISH NAVY.
The ship's bell is struck every half
hour to auuounce the time.
The quarter deek must always he sa-
luted. on being approacbed.
Postal orders are sold at face vain()
without poundage being charged.
The meter at arms or chief of police
is the only man In the, ship not being an
officer, allowed -to wear a sword.
. There is a government savings bank on
board every ship, paying three percent.,
but offieees may not use it.
Ropes are letu•ked with a thin colored
thread interwoven rea 12 1110(10 at Ports-
mouth, blue at Devonport, yellow at
Chatham.
From the minute a ship is commis-
sioned to the dass of payingooff there is
always an officer on watch dayo, and
night without intermission.
Grog is always mixed with three parte
water before being served out to the
men; warrant officers and petty officers
alone receive it undiluted.
At tiny time of the day or night a man
may be called upen for duty, if neces-
sary. Leave to go on sleeve is regarded
by the Admiralty as a privilege ami net
1st right.
An officer's sword at 5 court-martial
is laid on the table, point towards him,
when he enters to hear the finding If he
hes been adjudged guilty. It is reversed
if Ile is acquitted.
" •• 4.
The microscope in the hands of
experts employed by the United
States Government has revealed
the fact that a house fly some-
times carries thousands of disease
germs attached t� its hairy body.
The continuous use of Wilson's
Fly P.ads will prevent all danger.
of infection from that source by
killing both the germs and the
flies.
• • •
WHEN BLEUCHER WAS- IN PARIS.
Old Soldier Wanted to Destroy Many
Objects Dear to the French Heart,
The pleasant story, just brought id
light, of Humboldt's successful interven-
tioss to save the Jardln des Plantes from
the wrath of Blucher servos as a remin-
der, says the London Evening Standard,
that that tough old soldier needed many
humane advisers to keep him from des-
troying objects dear and important to
the French.
Wellington had often to intercede
with him, and that not invariabl-y with
immediate success. He resolved to blow
up the bridge of Jena. Wellington pro-
tested. "But the Freneh deetroyed the
pillar at Rothe& and so on," grumbled
Blucher, "and the English bathed TWA-
ingbon." Wellington, seeing that words
weer ineffeetive, placed. English eentries
on the bridge, believing that the Prus-
talons woulcl not truak•e any attempt to
destroy the structure while these Men
were in position. But they did.
They mined one of tlx pillars and put
asselmsge of gunpowder and fired it.
The tharge exploded in the wrong way,
and damaged the Prussians, leaving the
bridge and the Englishmen on top in
safety. This having failed, Blather
sought permission to demolish the col-
umn in the Place Vendome. The Xing
of Prussia arrived only just in time to
prevent it.
Wellington managed better when deal-
ing direct with the French. An ahnost
unexampled inetance of bie chivalry seas
fortheotnisig in the movements preced-
ing the battle of Orthez-the only battle
th which he received to injury. The
French bad retreated over the bridge of
the Gave du Pau, and Were preparing to
blow it sky* high. The Duke realized
that if this were done it would cause
great injury to the people of Orthez,
60 he sent an officer to Seta with it
message.
A battle would doubtleae take plate
on the following day, he said, and he
promised that if Soult would spare the
bridge the British army would not croes
by R. Soult had felt relUctant to con-
sent to the destruction, for the bridge
was on Freneli territsoss end lie willing-
ly took liis rietiPs word and left it ins
tact, Wellington kopt tits promise. He led
Isis nsen, under a heavy fire, rouses the
river by way of fords, luta the bridge
stands to this day.
X0 man likes tochave put off till to-
morrow the things) other people will do
for him to -day.
Newark Man's Collapse
Caused by Dizziness, Biliousness
and Pains in the flack.
DRQPIID IN DK STRUT.
Warstt weather stud Mete indilfeetinit
were the chief eaume of a physleal esen
lapse that overcame lir. %ro Donags
hue uear the entree of the ,Petinsyls
verde Rallroed depot last Thursday. A.
polieeman lifted hitu intou cab anO he
was herried to his home, In au inter-
view next day, Mr. Doneghue etateas
Wite practicilly uneonsmouts when 1 ar-
riven home. I knew I was in bed shape,
because for weeks 1 had been fighting
against pains in my back as eevere 44 11
I had been ehot aC' Indigestion mut
biliousnees were the cause of my eel
-
tepee, and lei doubt hid been keeping
up the headache and Oizziness frost
Mitch I Suffered. Fortunately, soy wife
keew just 'whet I needed, She gave me
three of 10,, lianditelVe Pilhi Of Alen -
drake end. Butternut and put me to
bed. In the morning 1 was as fresh as
daisy! 1111 SYStein was eleared of its lout
of poisonous westss end Ltelt like a neW
man. Ere -eV -slow 'on, in order to keep
lay system properly regulated, 1 will Use
Dr, Hainiltolfe Pins regulariy, 1 know
many' who do so and they never leave a
day's illness."
Why not be healthy, hearty and well,
You owe it to yourself, to your Utility,
to your friends, You. cannot work pro-
perly; yau cannot be happy youreelf, if
your are tethered by indigestion, aed
the nagging 'Seine and unpleasantnees
which accompany it -if you are Weak -
(elect by aneemia-if your blood is being
sptolipsaotojeodu.and your system upset by pans
If yott ave sutfering from any of these
dcrangements of the system -either tem-
porary or chronic --you Should go at
once to the nearest chemist and ask lam
for a box of Dr, Hainilton's Pills, This
perfeet tonic -laxative will cure your in-
digestion; purify and enrich your blood;
banish. constipation by safe and natural
means; improve your appetite; quiet
pear nerves, and help you to sleep
soundly. Dr, Hamilton's Pills avill give
you strength and vigor. They will help
you to work better, 25e. per box, or five
boxes for $1.00, at all dealers, or The
Catarrhozene Company, Kingston, Ont.
CHINESE AS SOLDIERS.
Experience of an English Officer Who
Drilled and Trained Thera,
One of the greatest assets possessed,
by Chinese as soldiers is in their march- ,
ing power; another is their ability to
manage with the smallest amount of
transport, owing to the 'way outdoor
life and elinutte to which they are ac-
customed, and to the fact that they live
almost entirely on rice, writes Mayor
0. D. Bruce in the Uniten Service Maga-
zine. Two other points in their favor
are that they /save no caste prejudices,
and have alleady learned the virtue of
discipline before they enlist. Drunken.
'less is practicaly unknown among them,
but they have the national fallings of
gambling an(1 opium smoking.
My' own experience leads me to class
most native soldiers as grown-up chil-
dren, and perhaps the most childlike is
the Chinaman. All the traits which have
to be studied ins dealing with children
are so many keys to open the door to
understanding their nature. Most amen-
able to kindness, he is at times quite
capable of taking advantage of 0.
Firmness he not only appreciates but
prefers; that is, once he realizes, as boys
say, that it Is no use to "try an." Above
all, he admires and will do anything for
those whom he realizes are trying in-
variably to he just. to him. Whether
gratitude ie to be set down as is, charae-
teristic opinions may differ.
My own is that he has it, aud would
exhibit it more often did not the hide-
bound conventions by which Chinese un-
written law surrouuds him make it some-
times nearly impossible. Whatever feel-
ings may remain in the hearts of those
whose fate it was to go through the -
unique experience of serving his Gracious
Majesty as soldiers in the late Chinese
Regiment of Infantry, I feel that I am
on sure ground in saying that the mem-
ories of those who trained them will
long retain the happiest recollections of
the trials through which officers, non-
commissioned officers and men passed to-
gether.
• • ai eee • •
LACK OF BLOOD
Is What Causes Headaches, Diul.
ness and Heart,Palpitation.
On the blood depends the Welfare of
the whole body. Where good blood ex-
ists disease is unknowu, but where the
blood is poor and. watery disease quick-
• ly seizes hold of the body. --it is then
headaches, backaches, dizziness, heart
palpitation and other serious ailments
make themselves felt. Good blood can
always be obtained through the use of
Dr. Williams' Pink Pills for Pale People.
They actually make good, rich blood and
thus restore lost strength and banish
disease. Mr. Herbert Hanson, Brewere
Mills, N. 13., says; "I cannot praise Dr.
Piint Pills too highly. I was
troubled with headaches, dizziness and
loss of strength and had it hacking
cough which I feared vvould leod to con-
sumption. I tried it number of medi-
cines without benefit, but was finally
persuaded to try Dr. Williams' Pink
Pills. I did so and used these Pills for
several montlos with remarkable resulta.
They helped sue so emelt that I now
strongly recommend them to all other
sufferers."
The experience of Mr, Hansen is tha.b
of thousands of others who have found
health and strength through Dr, :Win
limns+ Pink Pills after other medieines
had failed. It is through their power
in making good btoed that these Pills
cure such troubles as Anaemia,iudiges-
tion, rheumatismiheart palpitotion, neu-
ralgia, nervous troublest and the dis-
tressing ills of girlhog(1 and vontanhotel.
Dr. Williams' Pink Pills for Pale ?maple
are sold by all dealere ist medicine or di-
rect by mail from the Dr. Williams' Med-
101314 Brockville, Ont„ at 60 cents a
box. or ate boxes for $2;30.
•-•44.
Sure to Iteep Itis Word,
A. Well-knoWil clergyman on cole 00.
maimn preached a. sermon in a prison.
During the service he totieed that one
of the convicts present •iseemed very
much impressed. Later in the day he
toned tiro out end
"Elly friend, I hope you will profit by
my remorks just slow and. beeome
snow'
"Indeed 1. will," was the cheerful re-
ply. "In faet, 1 promise 'yots that
via Sieves' eommit enother crime, but
will in future lead an exemplary- life."
"t am very .glad to hear you toy that,"
said the elergymau, heartily, "but are
y1311 tertain you will be able to keen
the promiee?"
"Oh, yes:" said the emviet, in
fbr life."
•01.....0.4.11%•••4••••••.+4.61.4r
When a limn marries a Widow he must
expel her to he the eaptoist. At any
ratan hs her stecond mate,
According to stories to hand, 'Roan-
reit's slaughtering eXpedition 14 doing
its share to extertuin.ate the wild life of
Africe, What. 4 eonsumiug thirst to kill
potsesses some people?
.. •
Natal line given en overwhelmnig vote
hi -raver of joining, the South African
Vilion, This le gratifying news. :Natal
le alonist entirely Britieh 14 population,
Ana ite aditerenee to the Union is an
aseuntnee tinet Rritish idetie wilt domin-
ate the Stint Is Afrieati Federation.
Suppose an 14(1(4(1(.111 wit as that
which has dleabled time "Soo" canal
should happen to the Panama look
meal 7 Where would thint be all the -fine
(3Ig*11000ts of .the lock eanstl advoeatea
ae against an ocean level waterway?
Atal how many niillione of damage
might reeult?
It le ,almounced that -the new Litwin
. . • • •
openny," with the head of the martyr
President takiag the place 'of the Indian
head on the small United States pieets,
aye to Ise put into circulation in the ries
public, on July let. It has alwaye been
a puzzle wily an intelligent people
shoUld refer to a 1-0e1)1 pleee 58 0
"penny," the more eo ites they are justly
proud of their decimal coinage and es-
teem the. donstre end cents as superior
to the pounds, shillings and pence, le
the aberration dee to ignorance or to
faueled "sinertnees"?
4 4
A New Jereey man inheriteda big,
nrass-eitesped family Bible from hie
maiden emit in 1874, bet lie Was not a
Bible student, 00(1 he did not thinksnuch
of his legaeys The other day he was
curious, enmesh to unelasp the /15-yeter-
eld gift, when it wee found to contain
$4,867 in hills. Now he regrets his lack
of interest in the. hook. If he had had
the numey inveited at 5 per cent. in-
tereSt eomponeded senile -meetly it
isOmuld bave grown in the 35 years to
$26ee10.37.
lee a
New York State has now a nntionel
employment exehauge condueted under it
board of trustees representing leading
manufacturing, mercantile and contracting interests, An enterprise of the;
kind }lee a wide and useful field. There
are always many willing workers out of
employment, and, at the. same One, 11
is frequently possible to find them jobs,
if the work and the workmen can be
brought together. An organization like
Oda, with an object above the mere con
teetion of fees, may do great good.
•• •
The question of the old Cuban debt, it
trivial matter of about $400,000,000, is
likely to be heard Of again. 1.1 was gen-
erally aseanned that in wresting Cuba
from Spain the United States had "paid
off" that debt, hut the Treaty of Paris
did not in words sae so. But who 13,011111
eare to pay $400,000,000 for. all Cuba?
Not likely the. United States. They
have had trouble enough- over the is-
land. If the Spanish Minister at Havana.
preeents .the elalin, 59 he, is expected to
do, he may probably -be asked to wait a
While for the ease.
• •
Petele is likely tohave more trou-
ble with Castro, JIM bad boy of Vene.
0(10113. 8eel'Ot service men , have discov-
ered - that it gaeg of -filibusterers are
plot ti ng in New Yorkfar the overthrow
of the Ciontez administration and the
reAtOralion Of Castro to power. There
is said to be a million dollars behintl the
niovoment, and already twO veiSels and
31,000 rifles are in readiness. If nude
Sam wants his Monroe doctrine.to be re.
spected;he will have to concern himself
with the suppressiqn oE such plots Iiiitt
in las own territoes
4 ,c4
The American Medical Aseoeiation at
its meeting at Atlantic City emphati-
(oily iwoneuneed against the nse of food
-preservatives, such as .benzota of soda
and simular eltemicala. They uphold Dr.
the federal chemist, and de-
ttounce the ttction of Roosevelt's referee
board which overrnled Isis decisions; and
demand action by Congress to make the
embalming of food prodstets illegal. But
will the embalming interests have party
pull enough to outweigh the doctors and
iln‘ interests of plastic health?
One, Prank Miller, a hotel -keeper of
Stouffyille, has issued a writ against
Chief Sustice Meredith, claiming a pen-
alty of X500 under tut Imperial statute,
for refusing' a writ of habeas corpus to
the plaintiff who is serving a sentence
ef four mouths, imposed for 0 seeond
Offence against the Liquor Limuse Act,
Sir William Meredith refuted the mo-
tion for habeas corpus._ until the Exche-
quer Division shoulefironounce upon a
eimilar application. Unless the wheels
ef justice move more rapidly than ta-
ssel, Miller's success will probably, if
it depend upon the awaited -for judg-
Ment, be of little 1180 10 him in opening
his prison doors,
*5*
Contrary to the prevailing notion,
Panama hats are not made in Panama.
The chief plaees of their produetion are
Colombito Perm and I.:MO.(10r. The
Scientifie Anteriettn 9413,9 the cog of AM-
terial never eeeeede 33e and probably
it:serape Ise than 13e. The eost of the
labo), whit+ is exceedingly cheap-, 4301-
<3311314 to eoneiderable, it takes Aix or
803,011 daye of six hour9 a day for a
werkman to make 13 centmon hat, worth
*1 and Iwo weeks to make a hat MIMI
may bring $5. Sorimihnee six W(0'k4 3,4
AVM upon re hat for wide!' $.20 would
be obtained. The straw used in the fine
hats 10 neeer dampened. and, as the
work P.M Int 1,10110 titily Whell the air 19
meiet, the stoking time le limited to
morninge ond