The Blyth Standard, 1903-07-09, Page 6SLEEPY SHEEP.
Some Noted Instances of Bleeping in
Church.
"Slut the doors 1' cried Father An-
dre ooe day to the Suisse on duty.
Whale he observed the Archbishop of
`Paris asleep during file discourse.
"'Shut the d(xm>, the shepherd ie
asleep, the asleep will get out !"
"Some men preach," sid Sidney
Smith, "as if they thought sin is to
,bo taken out of a man ns Eee was
'taken out of Adam, by casting him
lbto a profound shnulam" So at any
Pato thought not South, 33 ho, preach-
ing one duty at Whitehall, observed
King Charles H. and oeveral of leis
'attune -emits asleep. Stooping down,
bo cried out to Olin of the delin-
quents, "sly lord, 111m sorry to Int( r -
rapt you, but if you more so loud,
you will wake the King."
HLo Majtety theremem awoke, and,
turning to Ids neighbor, remlu'ked
with Lis /mem:tom:el good tint ure,
"This man most be made a bishop ;
remind me on the next vacancy."
Too Much for Endurance.
Baltimore American,
It site In the courtyard of the Bul-
garian royal palace.
' Yonder conte the anti -revolution-
ists," shouted the royal ehnmixtrlaln
ton servant. "fun and call the King
quickly 1"
Taking a card from his pocket the
servant began to spell out the name.
It was Karageorgevitch.
" And yet," he said, bitterly, "they
expect me to call h'm quickly. It
Makes me sick!'
Suiting the notion to the word ho
threw up his job.
Vac Lever's Dry Soap (a powder) to
wash woolens and flannels, -you'll like
it. 32
The efarried State.
Philadelphia Ledger.
"It al'waye stems no strange to me
When I hear of a saleslady marrying
A
floorwalker," said the young thing
at the ribbon counter.
"Why so?" Inquired the sour man
in the Linen department
"Because it's second nature for a
saleslady and floorwalker to fight."
" Woll 7"
oft. A. W. CHASESCATARRH CURE a e"2c,
la sent direct to the dteease,
pans ley the Improved Move.Heals Me ulee,n, ctcartetbe ale
passages, stops dropplu�+ In the
throat and permananty Lytes
Catarrh and Hay Feve lower
free. Alt dealers, or Dr. A. W. Chase
Medicine Co.. Tarnowand Bahia
holes in it.
"Please give me a poled of cl motel"
Said Mrs. Nuwel to the grocer, "and,
say," she added, haughtily, "1 want
good, solld cheese: the last I got
base Maui holes In 11 !" t
$CRAiCNINC makes an Itching skin worse.
Weaver's t,erate allays the pain, takes out
KY
0 luftammattou, cwnus the akin ni erup-
eas and sores. Why not buy a bottle to -
Won the Het.
Bechtel American.
A London commercial, who had a
very ruddy complexion, after 'work -
Ing' Olaagow, had some time to watt
for his train et St. Enoch station,
and bethought himself of a good joky
"What is the name of this station,
my good man 7' he asked of a porter.
"St. Enoch station, sir."
A few minutes later he met the
same porter and said :
" What did you call this station,
porter 7"
St. Enoeh's. Dae ye no' see the
name abmte the hotel there 7"
Just then the train was shunted
in, and our English friend got c0111-
forta.10 seated In tl third-class
smoker, along with a few more pas-
lengers of the male persuasion.
"These railway officials are about
the worst 1 ever acme across; they
can't be civil," remarked the Lon-
doner.
"That's a confoueded lee!" said n
Scotch farmer.
Well;' Raid the' Londoner, "I'11 bet
you ten bob Idon't get a civil an-
swer from the first porter I tisk a
question of,'
" Done P' replied the old farmer.
Looking out of the carriage win-
dow he spied fits "green" friend and
calling him over asked In his most
polite tone:
' Woukt yon kindly tell me the
name of this station, porter 7"
" Gang awn', ye hacon-faeo l (kl
buffer 1 Pit yer daft Reid In 1" was
the answer.
3tinard's Liniment Cures Colds, ole.
Betrothed Before Birth.
During the Middle egos 1t was cus-
tomary for princes and princesses to
become betreotlted and married in
childhood to Inauro succession or poi-
itical advantages. But it was only
In exceptional cases that tinhorn
c1',ldren were disposed of in the same
way. Such a case. however, is on
record. It occurred in Ft68. whoa
Prince Sigmund, not of Emperor
tlllaries IV., watt flown. Oe his bap-
tlsmal day he was betrothed to
Katherine, daughter of the Count of
Nuremberg. On tint (rcetbslon It was
art cod that a daughter Of Chnrive
iV with whom Le expected to 103
ble*ead within five years, should be
married to a eon of Count Freder-
ick, of whom it was also hoped that
o .should so be provided. This de
edito youngest bridal couple on r(
leo'. The hoped-for daughter came
trot 1878, the last year Of the al-
{cltted period,. and else in time be-
oaao the wife of Johan III., the non
the Couot, mato also justified the
pectatiorss of his
parents. - St.
&olds Post -Dispatch.
LUMBEBIAN TELLS
HIS EXPERIENCE.
How Dodd's Kidney Pills Quickly
Cured Ills Lame Back.
William N. Raskin, of Norwood, Gives
Good Advice and Others are Fol-
lowing it With Splendid Results.
Norwood, •Ont., J uly lis-tSpccinl1
-William N. Deakin, thewellknown
lumberman and railroad contractor
of this place, tells of an experience
with Bolide. Kidney Pills that is
bound to he G interest to the pub-
lic generally,
"For two yea.re," says Mr. Bask-
in, "1 wars laid up with Latae Back
and Kidney Disease. I would at
tines become weak and have to
leave oft work. People who knew
me as lumberman and contractor
on the C. P. le. and Parry Sonud
Italhvaye knew how sick I was.
"Beading of wonderful cures by
Dodd's Kidney trills ltd me to try
talent. I used three boxes and nm
completely cured. I can any now
1 brave not jlad any pains since I
used Dodd's Kidney fills."
Others who have followed Mr.
Buskin's advice and tried Dodd's
Kidhey Pills report similar requite.
No form of Kidney Disease eau
stand before them.
Would Be Glad to Pay
Illustrated Bite.
Mina Frances -Don't you think
there should be a tax on bachelors,
Mr. Mucltlywnl-I'd gladly pay
for the privilege of being one.
ENGLISH SPAVIN LINIMENT
Removes all hard, soft or calloused
Lumps and blemishes from horses;
blood spavin, curia, epll'dt.. ringbone,
sweeney, suites, soratun, sore and
swollen throat, coughs, etc, Savo $,',O
by use of one bottle. Warranted the
most wonderful blemish cure ever
known.
A Relation ny Marriage.
"Children have queer Ideas;" said
the happy father of a bright young
boy- to a friend the other day. "I
don't, as a general thing, repeat the
sayings or tell of the doings of that
young one of aline, 'but really a
thing ho geld to me Mat before
Christmas, is worth repeating.
"Toddie wanted to give a present
to teeth member of tile family. I en-
couraged his generous thought and
prom6vod idm all the material aid
he might need. So lie made out the
list of the things he Intalned to
give and applied to me for the money
to buy them. 1 nskod to see the list
and found that tho present for Ills
mother called for a much larger
sum than the one for me,
"Of coatis., I agreed with his Idea
that hie mother should have the
best qf anything that wan going,
but I woo rather curious to know
why he thought 0e, and 1 netted hint
how 1t was ode mother was to get
a better present than his dad. His
anower staggered me.
"'Well,' he oil(L seriously, 'mam-
ma iv mamma always, but you arra
papa only beeetuse you married into
tho family.' "-Exclaange.
"THE ONLY WAY."
There le but one way to property
appreciate the advantages of a trip
to gees York or Boston on the
trains of the New York Central
Railway, and that le to use the line.
See your ticket agent.
Not an Edged Tool.
Annie Louise was re -arranging her
mother's work basket end found a
small gourd. She asked what 11 was.
Being told sate inquired:
"Is that what you cut gored eklrtn
with ?IP—Little. Chronicle.
No Benefit Derived.
La Rlre.
Bertle-Did you hear any rich old
uncle was dead 7
Oueale-No. What did he leave you?
Bort le -Not ting !
Gus91e-Well, what's the good of his
being dead 7
Mlkn
WHIM
Work
With the
Cklid:
Play
New Century Bali Bearing
Washing Machine
and a couple of ave year old ehildren-
the washing need not stand over
Five minutes to a tubful and you will
have no use for wash boards. It clean-
ses perfectly.
Von cannot afford to be without it.
Order through your deafer. We will
mail you a booklet ou application.
The DOSWELL MFG. CO., Limited
HAMILTON, ONT.
Lost a Good Snapshot.
Judge.
He -Look, look ! I think that man
out In the breakers is drowning!
she -0h, hearens ! and I have Left
my camera at home !
LONDON AND PARiS.
Differences are strongly Marked and
Are Often ()ppoalte.
The contrasts presented by Paris
and Lundun are rather emu:angle
put by Felix Prj(1 ill the tutu, of
tate former city. Ile says
"1':tris tlo's 10001 things Willi the
right haat or at the right Icoh1
side ; Lundell follows the left.
"Parisian coachmen keep to the
right, those of Loudon to the lett.
Paris grown by absorption, Lou-
don by expansion.
"Paris is Melt of stone, London
of brick.
"Peril/ Ince high houses and nar-
row streets, 1.011(1uu's buildings are
low and its streets wide.
"7ehr windows of Paris open Tike
doors, those of London a to guillo-
tine.
"Ihtrle Is eolleetivistie, It dwells
In houses which are really earnvan-
series; London Is Individualistic,
enols family having its uw'n house.
"Paris has Its pprt!er, London ids
night key.
"Paris gets up early from its bed,
which is against the wall; London
arises late from Its bei, WL1.+h is
In the centre of the room.
"Paris dines, London eats.
"London said Voltaire, has 100
religions, and but one sauce;
Paris has 100 sauces and no relig-
ion at all.
"Paris is gay, London end.
"London has too few, soldiers.
Parte too teeny. The soldier in
Paris wears blue tuulo and pant-
aloons, while the London tuan-oft
war et 01141 in a lid court aud blue
trousers.
"In Paris priests perform the
marriage ceremony; In London
they marry themselves.
"In Paris the married women are
free; in London when a woman
marries etre ceases to be,
"Paris has mora suicides, London
more honeeklee.
"Paris works, London traffics.
"In Paris the street crowds fight
by kicks, in London ndon by blows of tho
fist
"Tho proletariat of Paris refer
to the patvnl:hop 0e "my Hunt,"
while In Loudon they say My
uncle.' "
BINDER TALK,
Some or the important features of
the Massey -Mums Bander are:
Folding Dividers --No bolts or nuts
to unscrew. You merely release a
spring on the outeitbo Dickler and
unhook the inside one to fold them.
A youngster can do 1t easily and
properly. The Dividers are very
rigid le their working 10,31ll o e and
remain at whatever angle they are
folded over the conveyor canvas.
Floating Llevatolra-Tiley literally
flout. The grain cannot stick or
choke In the Mnsst'y-Harris eleva-
tor, no matter how much It 1l/
bunched.
Simple Knotter-Capable of ad-
justment to take up wear.
Roel -Suited for handling the
crops under all conditions of wea-
ther or land. It tv111 pick up tan-
gle' or laid gratin and lay it neatly
on the table. it 011,1 handles long or
reborn grain w•if11 splenlid success.
Roller Bearingv throughout to
lighten the draft and snake the work
eugy for the Gorges. The beaeto know
when they are hitched to a Mptesey-
Itavele-it rune so easily.
Another Peaceful Blockade.
Chicago Post.
She (Indlgnnntly)- SIr, what do you
mean tl)' putting your arm around
Illy ivaiet?
Ho (meekly) -Why, 1-er-thought
you wouldn't object.
She -Well, I do, and I'll give you
Just three lours In wlticli to remove
I.t"
I was cured of Bronchitis and
Asthma by MINARD'S LINIMENT.
MRu1. .1. LIV-INGSTONE.
Lot 5, 1'. E. I.
I was cured of a severe attack of
IWtenmatlsm by olINAi1D'S LINI-
M1EN'T
Mahone Bay. JOHN MADER.
I was cured of a severely sprained
leg by MINARD'S LINIMENT,
JOSHUA WYNACHT.
Bridgewater,
ABOUT THE REDHEADED GIRL
She Poetesses Qualities of Which Her
Darker sister Cannot Hoaet.
A champion of the red-headed girl
has come to the front. Not that the
girl In question 1s greatly In need
of a champion. In nine eases out of
ten she id abundantly able to care
for lterselt without aselstanee from
any source. But Ole advice of "the
girl with the auburn hair" defies
the world to dispute the truth of
these five propositions:
The red-headed girl cnn-
1. Detect the odor of a peevlotus
high Loll further, quicker and with
more finer/lag Instinct than any
other being on earth.
2. Nail a Ile and bore deeper (holes
with her penetrating eye In 90 doing
than any other thtug that Inas eyes.
8. Mika any hie nae of a liar look
Ilke thirty cents quicker and with
logo effort than any other living
thing.
A. Break a man's morning nap and
hustle him to build the fire Ie. the
range quicker, tourer ani with lees
back talk than any other style of
womankind.
5. She le the only known species
who can throw a miftele with accu-
rate aim and who does not endan-
ger the levee of innocent by -stand-
ere.
A little Sunlight Soap will clean
cut glass and other articles until
they shine and sparkle. Sunlight
Soap will wash other things than
clothes.
dB
1(hnt. for Saving Alimony.
Chelsea Gazette.
Lawyer -You can't get a divorce on
such evidence es that,
Client -chert how out I to get rid
of her ?
Lawyer -Well, some automobiles
are nail to be dangerous.
Millard's Liniment Cures Diphthe-
ria.
Mabel Rocas Her Business.
Puck,
" It is a great mistake, Mabel, to
trifle with the affoctions of a man
who levee you by encouraging sem('-
ote elec."
"Well, he's a little slow, Auntie. I
think he needs a pacemaker."
Minard's Liniment Cures Garget In
Cows.
A (TREAT FRONTIER JUDGE.
He Sentenced 172 Men and 88 01
Theta Were Hanged.
Front a *thatch of Judge I. C. Park-
er, in Frank Lesllo's PON bar Month-
ly for July. this is taken:
A man who stwteneed 172 crim-
inals; tc deaths, 88 of shorn were
hanged ; an upright judge, holding
sway for 2 1 years over 73,000 square
utiles od the most lawless territory
In the United elates; a stern, just
Judge, whom name became a terror
to ovtl doers; a very kindly, Heel -
pathetic gentleman and public spir-
ited citizen -few characters Ilitvo
been developed In our west who have
played a snore striking rola than
Isaac C. Parker, United Slates Dis-
trict Judge for the Weider!) Dte-
trict of Arkansas, from May, 787:,,
to September, 11417(1. The story of
Gla work, which le told in art article
In Leslie's Monthly for July, is as
thrilling ae It is truo.
How sternly he pursued his ap-
pointed task anti with what aid he
succeeded In accomplishing It la
:Mown by the empire record that,
during his term of office, sixty-five
of Ills deputies were killed in fights
with Saw-broukers.
Good Tuings to Know.
Leather bags can be freshened by
rubbing with a cloth slightly molel-
ctnod with sailed oil. Pullet: wttlt dry
dusters afterward till every vestige
of oil id removed.
The low shoes are generally laced
with wide rlhbtus. Red ribbon is thus
used Le a black Orford tie,
Strap effects :Ire much in vague .0
high Aloes and slippers. The high
shoes may be fastened with eight or
nine of these straps, encl. ornament -
tel with a scone buckle In sliver, gilt
or bronze, Thane Str;tps have euper-
sedel the colonial buckles on low
Hee.
Whitening the Skin.
If a remedy 19 wanted to produce
Immedlato and wonderful effects In
whitening the skin use tar and
olive oil, heated together and
cooled. Use upon the face when go-
ing to bed wttli a musk of thin old
linen or uranin put on to prevent
coming off -further protecting the
pillows by an ofd sheet thrown over
them. In the morning a bath of
white cnstlle soap and water brings
the face ant pare and softly ttntel
teuuJ q;!!m pepvaq putt eoll ewe
e
as a elders. Tials 1s not only the
best, but one of the most harmless
and cheapest preparations that can
be procured.
Innocents at Home.
1.itn.
Mrs. Cnsophlot-They must fit three
men's ebubst up very gorgeously in-
side.
Mrs. Worldley-Why 7
Mrs. Unsophist -I heard your hus-
band tell mine that he wee playing
the whole evenllg on velvet.
ISSUE NO. 28, 1903
Mra Winslow'a Dootbmg fiffl'ap .botdd
always ba need for Cblldreo Teething. 11
soothes the child, softens therms, aura wind
code and le the beet remedy for Dt whore,
W.1 N'1'F0—t11t1(1IIT, I: NN. 11 17.T IC
young men 101111 rho Garro, with good
address andibiek that cannot lie turned
((170, 0011 1)1010,- from $b 1 to 12(1 por week
.riling oar specialties of recognised merit to
the wholesale and retell merchant. In (1.
Potted Sturm 011 00111111 10/0011 ; travelling et.
11000,0 advanced. address P.O. box No. 68
Hamilton, oat.
1)1HW. 11.1.. 711'1,3'tNEV TAPE WORM
cure IN safe and Kure. Write for 11st of
names of people cured to da Queen street
west, Toronto.
Summer
Excursions
7'o Itoeheator, 1 00 Islands, ]ray of Write,
}tuphin Cit. Lawrence, to Montreal, Quebec,
31 array Buy, River du Loup, 'I'ndousac,
Saguenay Inver.
Steamers Toronto, Kingston
atm by steamers Hamilton, Spartan
and Corsican.
Farther inform] tion apply to H. Foster
Chaffee,western Passenger Agent, 'Toronto
USE
1,000 MILE AXLE GREASE
It Has No Equal
Manufactured only by
THE CAMPBELL MFC. CO.
of HAMILTON, ONTARIO.
For solo by all leading dealers.
'NATURAI.
—FLAVOR
CIS
TOP
,1' Summer
fy' Luncheon
' t.jt Foods
Meet cv ., s r. taisite of the impromptu
r
hot weather meal.
Polled Nan, Bat and Tongue, or Tongue (Wats),
Veal Lal, Deviled Nam, brisket Ike,,
Salad Smoked Bat Cts
All natural flavor foods -palatable and whole-
some, your grocer should have them.
Fart—Tbe booklet"now to Wks Good Thine*
to gat." Hm,d Kivu 2e stomps for Llbbr'. big Atlas
of the World.
s Libby, McNeill & Libby, Chicago, 111.
A Cockney'N Spell.
Kangas City Journal.
Jonathon -I say, Britisher, can you
spell horse 7
Englishman -'Orae? Why, certainly,
It honly takes a Leitch and a ho and
a har and a Gess and a he to spell
'orae.
There Is more Catarrh In this section of the
country then nil other dlseaaes put together,
met until the lint few years was supposed to
be Incurable. Fora great many 3'eare doe.
tors pronounced 1t a local dlsease and pre*.
eribed local remedies and by couetnntly fall.
Ing to cure with local treatment, pronounced
it incurable. science has proven catarrh tone
a coiistftutfonnl disease and therefore re.
quires a constitutional treatment. Ha11'eCe.
tnrrh Cure, manufactured by F. J. Cheney Se
Co., Toledo, Oleo, In the only constitutional.
cure on the market. It It taken internally la
doses from 10 drops to a teaspoonful. It act'
directly on the bleed and mucous surfaces of
the system. They offer one handfed dollar*
for any muse It falls to cure. Send for circu-
lars and testimonial..
Address F. J CHENEY & CO., Toledo, O.
Sold by Drugghats-7 Lc.
Hall's Family Pills are the best.
She Was Posted.
C lenge News.
"Say, mamma," queried little Elsie,
"what is a stag party 7"
"Stag, my dear, is an abbreviation
of stagger," replied the knowing
mother.
jeflnard's Liniment Cures Distemper.
"There goes a spanking team," raw
marked Willie Brown to Tommy
Jones ass the two boys' mother walk.
ed down the street together.
It Tells in the
Show Ring
It you hope to exhibit your stock at the
Pall Fairs, .tart now and get them in per-
fect health by using
Dick's Blood Purifier
It will bola loo to carry off the
l alae Ribbon.
Fifty Cants par package.
LESSHNG, Intatt a CO.. Meatreai, Agents
y,
oir
tSVP!E_'rRIOR TO ALL OTHICRS
E. S. EDDY'S
NEW
INDURATED
FIBRE WARE
TUBS, PAILS, ETC
For sate by alt first char dealers
M- INSIST ON owl TING woov's-Mip