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The Huron Expositor, 1955-04-29, Page 2u II i F: OSO'OR ed 1899 Published at Seaforth, Ontario, every Thursday morning by McLean Bros. A. Y. McLean, Editor Subscription rates, $2.50 a year in advance; foreign $3.50 a year. Single copies, 5 cents each. Member of Canadia Weekly Newspape Association. Advertising rates on application. PHONE 41 Authorized as Second Class Mail Post Office Department, Ottawa SEAFORTH, Friday, April 29, 1955 Up To Each Citizen This week Dr. E. G. Pleva, Profes- sor and head of the Department of Geography at the University of Western Ontario, addressed a joint meeting of the Seaforth Lions Club and the Seaforth Chamber of Com- merce, and discussed the extent to which communities, such as Seaforth, could be expected to develop in the future. While in general a major increase in population can be anticipated, it is interesting to realize what de- termines the extent to which the over-all increase will be reflected in a particular community. So often the attraction of indus- try and additional population to a town is regarded as being entirely something for the Council or the Chamber of Commerce. But that is not so, according to Dr. Pleva. Even more important than any action which official bodies take, is the atti- tude of individual citizens. Do they like the town? Are they proud of it? Proud of its traditions? Have they faith in its future? Above all, is there, in the town, a tradition of service in a municipal sense? A town in which difficulty is experienced in obtaining capable and responsible citizens to act on various municipal bodies suggests the lack of a proper sense of responsibility on the part of its citizens. The result of all this adds up to the fact that a town is just what those who live in it make it. It may be of a size where it of- fers maximum benefits and facilities to its citizens; where life is pleasant; where everyone is happy. Or, it may be a town full of dissention; of carp- ing criticism—e town in which noth- ing is accomplished; in which faith in the future is lacking. The decision rests, not with the Council nor with the Chamber of Commerce, but with every citizen. What kind of a town do you want? second annual convention of the:.. Canadian Mobile Home Association. In the minds of many Canadians, mobile homes are something that is attached to the back of a car to provide temporary accommodation while en route from place to place. That this is not the case, and that there is a place for the mobile home, was emphasized by the Reeve of Scarborough Township, who wel- comed the convention. "Mobile homes help construction workers, skilled tradesmen in all types of industries, oil and pipeline workers, army and air force person- nel, and others in mobile occupations to keep their families together," he ' said_ "Much of your trouble," the reeve added, stems from misunderstand- ings on the part of the general pub- - tic about trailers. They know about the early camping -type trailer, but they haven't been brought up to date." There is more of course to the problem than a lack of knowledge as to the accommodation offered by a modern mobile home. One of the main difficulties is the position in which municipalities find themselves when numbers of mobile homes are established within their boundaries. There frequently arises a demand for municipal services, such as schools, greater than the municipal- ity can provide. At the same time, the municipality is prone to regard the resident of a mobile home as one who is not carrying a fair share of the municipal tax burden. That these problems are recogniz- ed and can be worked out satisfac- torily is indicated by the managing director of the association, who urg- ed the members to work with the municipalities to the end that pro- vincial legislation would be enacted to enable mobile home families to pay their fair share of local taxes. The .Charm of Country Roads One thing that we in the rural areas have at our front door is the presence of plain ordinary country „roads. Now that Spring is at hand and all the loveliness of nature is unfolding at every look, a country road along which one cane dawdle— a typical old country road with all the natural bills and hazards and charin left in, becomes particularly pleasant. There are many such roads. They are smooth, well-maintained town- ship roads,but theye haven't that tail - cored look that marks provincial and county highways. They avoid that sameness so common to our high- ways. They wander across the coun- tryside, up and down hills, without that sense of strain, of speed that characterizes the smooth, even pave- ments so much in demand today. Theypermit of stopping on a hilltop, of riving in a sauntering fashion— all the things the -motorist shouldn't do on modern highways. In this world of change, oftetl\ violent and sudden, it is good for the soul to be aware of things that change only on their own terms and in their own time, Reader's Digest observes in discussing in a recent is- sue the need of more back 'roads:. "That's why the back -road driver persists, even in this day of won- drous super -highways. He has to know where he came from as -well as where he is going." For A justment e tent tti + ba ;b the • mobile 0Ming, a fietOr in soly- t n housi lg problem t the reentry .held nlgi WHAT OTHER PAPERS SAY: THE ON EXPOSITOR SEEN IN THE- COUNTY PAPERS Pervh Bifaag Get ready for the aennal spring influx of ardent anglers. Bert MacDonald at Goderich harbor reported Wednesday afternoon that the perch were biting. Rain and cool winds prevented fisher- men from angling for the wily fish but it is expected that with fine weather this weekend a good crowd may be seen at the dock.—`. Goderich Signal -Star. Skaters Pass Tests At Guelph Two members of the Wingham Figure Skating Club participated in the dance tests held at Guelph O.A.C. arena, during the Easter holidays, under the direction of Ross Smith. Harold Brooks was successful in passing "The Willow Waltz" and' John Wild became the first member of the Wingham club to qualify for the bronze dance medal, when he passed the "Tenj, Fox" and "Fourteen Step." Con,, gratulations are in order to Rose Smith, on having over 80 per cent Advance -Times. Heart of Calf Born in Throat One often hears the expression, "bis heart was in his mouth." A calf that literally has his heart in his throat • was born two and a half weeks ago to a high grade Durham cow owned by Elmer Powe, Centralia. After a few day's special attention he found his way to his mother when hun- gry and back to the other calves to bed. He is progressing well in i size and activity. He now jumps about and butts other animals. The heart can be seen and felt, i's of good size, and the beat is regular and pronounced.—Exeter Tirnes-Advocate. Water From Lake Huron By Pipeline (London Free Press) For some years many observers of the water supply situation in Southern Ontario have maintained that, sooner or later, the growing centres of population would be forc- ed to secure their water from the Great Lakes. Now Dr. E. G. Pleva, professor and head of the depart- ment of geography, University of Western Ontario, predicts that with- in the next 25 years all cities in the Thames and Grand River water- sheds will be getting their water from Lake Huron by a pipeline net - .work. The argument, pro and con, has always been a debate on the avaiI- able quantity.of water in the under- ground reservoirs. The artesian well- group maintained these would prove sufficient. The others—now hacked by Dr. Pleva—took the stand that these subterranean supplies could not indefinitely prove adequate and that a pipe to Huron was the solution. Chief objection to such a plan has been the high cost. Dr. Pleva points out that it is a long-term investment, and that the whole economic future of this rich industrial region will depend ''upon adequate water sup- plies. Our cities have enough water for the time being, but in the long run, they will have to look farther afield. London's position, he said, is that there is ample water in the -Fanshawe Lake project and the wells system to serve a population of 200,- 000, if we hold to the same per capita consumption we have now. Some cities are already considering a pipe to Lake Huron. As Southern Ontario develops in- dustrially the demand for water must increase, for industrial plants are greedy consumers of water. There is also, as Dr. Pleva pointed out, an increasing need on the part of farmers for water for their crops, particularly the specialized crops. Irrigation will make a greater de- mand. The long-range picture is one of increasing industry, population, and food production, all of which require water in vast quantities. Conserva- tion should add to our moisture con- tent. TVA, for example, is building farm ponds at the rate of two a week. The Huron pipeline network however, seems to be the logical solution_ of the water supply prob- lem of'.the'near future. The founda- tion planning should be started now., '.+�n,F voN�vailti.^n*�luLAr;:e113 rectionai antenna at a height of 793 feet. The transmitter- will erected abort three miles so a, west of Walkerton in Carriek town- ship. The Wingham station is in- tended to serve Bruce, Grey, Hur- on and parts of Dufferin, Perth, Wellington and Waterloo Counties. —Clinton News -Record. Held For Vandalism ednesday two young men were pic by provincial police in connection with a number of cases of vandalism in the Auburn area. They are being heid in the county gaol at Goderich. Almost certain disaster to the train crew of the C.P.R. freight between Goderich and Auburn was averted last Sat- urday morning, when two boys discovered a 33 -foot length of rail- way steel, weighing 840 pounds, across the rayls. The boys, Gor- don L. Gross, R.R. 1, Auburn, and his cousin, Donald Muegge, Sea - forth, ran down the track to try to stop the oncoming freight. Meanwhile J. Franken, who hap- pened to be crossing the tracks at a railway crossing, managed to move the obstruction from the rails. The freight stopped almost on top of where the steel had been. Other acts of vandalism in the immediate area were also discov- ered on Saturday moaning. A roll of snow fence was found strewn across County Road No. 25, and a tractor left in a nearby field had been moved and tampered with.— Clinton News -Record. Mystery Man Who is Joe? That's the prob- lem Ontario Provincial Police in Goderich are attempting to solve. Provincial Constable Arnold Sum- mers investigated a complaint last Saturday night that a suspi- cious man was wandering around on the 4th concession of Stanley Township, near the Clinton R.C. A.F. School. He took the man, who remembered only that his name was "Joe," to the County Jail here. A search of the man's clothes revealed no further iden- tification. Police said the man was apparently a New Canadian of Polish origin, and about 45 years of age, 160 pounds, dark complexion. He was wearing knee-length rubber boots, dungar- ees, brown shirt and a blue -grey topcoat. Goderich Signal -Star. TV For Wingham Has Approval The board of governors of the CBC has recommended approval cf Wingham's application for a television station license, it has been announced. In the opinion of the board, the application made by W. T. Cruickshank, on behalf of radio station CKNX Limited, at Wingham, was satisfactory. The board said the station would ex- tend national coverage as well as providing local service. Technical- ly, the proposal was acceptable. The Wingham station will operate n charnel 8. It will have a di - ;Gu l,. +p; APRIL 29, 1955 TEARS AGONE I SELECT WINGAM MINISTER AS MODERATOR IN LONDON, HAMILTON " R Ing Renis picked from The Huron Expositor of 25, 59 and 75 Years Ago. From The Huron Expositor May 2, 1930 On Saturday afternoon, April 26, Mrs. William Dodds, McKillop, was hostess at a shower given in honor of Miss Helen Kerr. About 20 of her girl friends gathered to extend, their best wishes to the bride. Mrs. A. J. Huether and chil- dren, of Morriston, were Easter visitors with her sister, Mrs. C, Eggert, McKillop. -® Mr. Cecil Wiley, of Flint, was renewing acquaintances in Varna during the holiday season. Drivers Create Disturbance From time to time in the past local residents, particularly those who live in close proximity to the main street, have had their slum- bers disturbed by screeeching brakes and loud exhaust bangs as someone in a gay mood and un- willing to go home to bed himself, has endeavored to keep others a- wake too by using the main street as a race track. Fortunately the incidents decreased during the paast few months, probably be- cause winter driving is not con- ducive to such antics, but now that the "main drag" is again clear of ice and snow, recurrences are likely to crop up. The ad- vance performance was staged late last Friday night, or early Saturday morning, and with an appjarently new twist. Residents were surprised on Saturday morn- ing to see car tracks across the lawn of the Memorial Hall and also on the boulevard along the south side of the Bank of Com- merce building. The vehicle had been driven up over the sidewalk, along the boulevard, missing the corner of the bank building by an eyelash as it turned north down the sidewalk. More tracys were discernable where probably the same vehicle had cut across from the alley back of the Memorial Hall, coming out on the sidewalk at the front, and following the walk north. Fortunately the grounds were soljid enough that damage was negligible, but it is a practice that will be discourag- ed in no uncertain terms if local police authorities catch up with the offenders.—Blyth Standard. The Rev. Alexander Nimmo, of Wingham, was elected 81st mod- erator of the London and Hamil- ton Synod of the Presbyterian Church of the opening of sessions in London Monday. Mr. Nimmo is well known throughout the dis- trict, where he bas preached on many occasions. Mr. Nimmo won the approval of Synod on the second ballot, de- feating the Rev. James Fleming, of Wallaceburg. He was nomin- ated on behalf of Bruce Presby- tery by the Rev. Joseph MacDon- ald, of Ripley. Mr. Fleming was the nominee of Chatham and Sarnia Presby- teries and his qualifications were bespoken by the Rev. Donald Mac- hines, of Ridgetown. Five ministers were put forward for the highest office in Synod, more than have been nominated for several years. Others nominated, who lost out on the first ballot, were the Rev. Richard Stewart, of New St. James, Lond'6n, nominated by the Rev. Hugh Pritchard, of Rodney; Lewis Kirkby, of Walton, has gone to the West to spend the sum- mer. Mr. and Mrs. Peter B. Gardiner and Miss Vera Gardiner have re- turned to Walton after spending a week with relatives in Detroit. Mrs. Dora Holmes, Brussels, has returned to take up her duties as teacher in the junior depart- ment of Walton public school. Mr. Gilbert Jarrott, of Western University, London, visited - for a few days with his parents, Mr. and Mrs. Isaac Jarrott, of near Kippen. Mr. Clarence McLean, of West- ern University, spent the Easter holidays with his parents, Mr. and Mrs. J. B. McLean, Tuckersmith. Miss Isabel Moir, Hensall, is the guest of her sister, Mrs. J. D. Stewart. Miss Irene Douglas has return- ed to Hensall after a pleasant visit with relatives in Detroit. Miss E.' Beattie, Seaforth, is teaching at No. 10, Tuckersmith, in the absence of Mrs. H. Cald- well, whom we hope will soon be able to resume her duties. Mr. William Elcoat and daugh- ter, Miss Jean, returned to Sea - forth on Tuesday from Wallace - town, where they spent Easter. Mr. R. L. Thompson is having a cellar and cement foundation built under bis residence on John St. Miss Norma Rose, Seaforth, at- tended the Rapien-Rode wedding on Wednesday in McKillop. Lawn Mixtures The cool, moist growing condi- tions of Ontario will produce a good lawn turf' when the proper mixtures and cultural practices are used, says M. R Wiancko. Federal Experimental Station, Kapuskasing, Ont. When choosing a mixture for a specific purpose all or part of the following alification< :-hould be given co{deration: aggressive- ness, persistence, te'cl.1r,.. density, drought resistance. ability to main- tain a green color throughout the season, disease resistance, and wearing ahillor. Lawn mixtures should be seed- ed at from 4 to 5 pounds of seed per 1,000 square feet. A lawn mixture is usually expressed as .a percentage by weight of' the spe- cies involved. For example, a mixture of Kentucky blue grass 40 per cent and creeping red fes- cue 60 per cent, sown at 5 pounds per 1,000 square feet, would con- tain two pounds of Kentucky blue grass and three pounds of creep- ing red fescue. - Under Ontario conditions a re- commended general mixture for home lawns is Kentucky blue grass 30 per cent, colonial hent 30 per cent and creeping red fescue 40 per cent. While this mixture has a tendency to brown off in color during dry periods, this can be overcome by proper watering. With regard to color, texture and density the mixture of Kentucky blue grass 35 per cent, red top 30 per cent and rough -stalked mea- dow grass 35 per cent, is good, although not so aggressive, as some other mixtures. However, rough -stalked meadow grass pre- fers shaded areas. If the red top in the preceding mixture is replac- ed by creeping red fescue the mixture would be --suitable for shaded grass. If white clover is desired a suit- able mixture would be Kentucky blue grass 30 per cent, colonial bent 30 per cent, rough -stalked meadow grass 35 per cent, and white Dutch clover 5 per cent. A second choice would be Kentucky blue grass 30 per cent, red top 30 per cent, rough -stalked meadow grass 35 per cent, and white Dutch clover,.5 per cent. For I playing surface, which is subject to hard use, a mixture of Kentucky blue grass 40- per cent and creeping red fescue 80 per cent, seems the most suited ,to Ontario conditions. ada. The Regulations covering this reads: "Seeds or plants of potatoes shall not be advertised, offered, sold or had in possession for sale for the purpose of seeding 'or planting in Canada, unless such variety is licensed for sale by the Minister." It has recently been noted, states the Chief of the Plant Protection Division, Department of Agricul- ture, Ottawa, that in the Prairie Provinces certified seed potatoes of unlicensed varieties are being imported by firms who wish to re- sell them. This is a contraven- tion of the regulations. Practical- ly all the 'older ,established varie- ties are licensed and to avoid con- travening the regulations import- ers who are anticipating resale of imported seed should ascertain whether or not the variety is lic- ensed. A list of licensed potato varieties may be obtained from the local representative of the Plant Protection Division, or di- rectly from the Chief of this Division in Ottawa. It is also pointed out that impor- tatiop of potatoes from countries other than the United States is, in general, prohibited or restricted and an import permit is required in advance. , Use Pesticides With Safety, A good deal of attention is bing focused on the hazards at- tending the use of agricultural chemicals, especially pesticides. Not the least of the efforts for safe use is made by industry in de- termining the potential danger of the chemicals sold, and in` putting practical precautions and direr- tions on the labels, that if follow- ed, practically eliminate the pos- sibility of harmful effects. The following list of general pre- cautionary measures taken from the National Agricultural Chemi- cal News and Pesticides Review adds emphasis to the need for careful use of pesticides, a group of agricultural chemicals which are essential component of the farmer's production program. 1. Read the label noting particu- larly the warnings and cautions before opening the container and before each use. 2. Deep the pesticide out of reach of children, pets and irre- sponsible persons. In case of acci- dental poisoning, call a physician or get the patient to a hospital at once. 3. Always keep the pest control materials in original closed and properly labelled containers. 4. Never give! net ibor or any- one a iirtfoii b a pOStICide in an (Celatltiiued fan Page. 'f) 1. Unlicensed Varieties of Certified Seed Potatoes Cannot Be ,Sold Under the Seeds Act the sale of certified seed potatoes of unlilen9- ed varieties is prohibited in Can - • the Rev. Charles Carnegie, Ham- ilton, by the Rev. Lorne MacKay, of Hamilton; and the Rev. G. Deane Johnston, of Brantford, by the Rev. D. T. Evans, of Ingersoll. Mr. Nimmo was born in North- ern Ireland and came to Canada in 1925. He went to Mb -areal Col- lege and graduated in 1929, and took bis first charge at Morewood in Eastern Ontario. He held the pastorate for, eight years before - moving for a two-year spell at Athelstan in Quebec. •From there - he went to Beauharnois for four and a half years and at the out- break of war became an R.C.A.F. chaplain, serving at St. Thomas, Trenton and Rockcliffe stations. On his discharge from the ser- vice he moved to Wingham. He bas served as convener of the radio committee of the. Pres- byterian Church in Canada and for six years was on the Board of Evangelism. He is married and has one daughter, Mrs. George Malcolm, wife of a missionary serving in Formosa. Three days. ,ago he became a grandfather for the first time. From The Huron Expositor April 28, 1905 M. and Mrs. H. P. Kennedy have returned from Toronto to spend the summer at their home in Egmondville. Mr. and Mrs. John Dodds and the Misses Dodds were visiting friends in Michigan during the past week. Mr. E. J. Hamilton, of town, left on Tuesday for Manitoba. If he sees anything to suit him in the West, he will likely locate there, but in the meantime his family remains here. Mr. Charles Aberhart has open- end his ice cream parlor in the rear of his drug store for the sum- mer months. - Mr. and Mrs. Thompson, Hul- lett, spent Easter with Mrs. Thompson's parents, Mr. and Mrs. R. McMordie, Kippen. Mr. B. R. Higgins, Brucefield, spent the Easter holidays with his brother, Thomas Higgins,, Rose- dale, Toronto. Miss Ross, of Seaforth, spent Sunday with her sister, Mrs. Wm. Berry, Brucefield. Mr. Frank McGavin has return- ed to Walton from Toronto, hav- ing finished his course at the busi- ness college in that city. He will probably remain at home during the summer. Mrs. McLeod was in Hensel] this week visiting her mother, Mrs. James White. Miss Aitcheson and Miss Doan, teachers in Hensel, are at their homes spending the vacation, the former at Seaforth and the latter at Zurich. - Mr- and Mrs. James Hughes, of Seaforth, spent Sunday with Mr. M. Flannery, St. Columban- Mrs. Hughes remained a few days with her sister-in-law, Mrs. J. J. Flan- nery Mr. Robert Fortune, St. Colum - ban, has bought a handsome new driver. • • tri 'BIG BUSINESS' and 'VESTED INTERESTS' A STRAW MAN TO BE KICKED (An Editorial in the Farmer's Advocate) It has been customary for many years to blame "big business" and "vested interests" for the misfortunes of individuals and for th inability of organizations to lean d their members into the Prom- ised Land ,By and large, the accusations hrled so boldly against these un- named, unidentified evil one, have been somewhat effective, temporarily at any rate, in in?u- encing public opinion, for gener- ally speaking business is conced- ed to be wicked, if it's big, and a varying 'amount of approbrium is always associated with the term "vested interests" regardless of for what purpose or by whom the term is used. Moreover, one can wax eloquent in denunciation of these mythical characters or institutions because there is no flanges of action for slander or libel when no individual is accused and no corporation is identified or named. It is difficult to think of a vest- ed interest as other than a huge octopus with tentacles squeezing the life blood out • of its victims, which may be individual citizens, occupational groups or small busi- nessmen and manufacturers. Of course the vested interests enjoy special rights and privileg- es, the exercise of which rob all those not so vested of a fair share of the national income. But our deep-seated impressions do not comprehend where the bastions are located, behind which the veested interests are concealed, nor is it questioned when, by what - means, or at what price, they ob- tained the unusual powers. Surely the railroads are big en- ough to belong, yet there is no industry in Canada pushed around as much by Government boards or dictated to so ruthlessly by labor unions as the transportation com- panies. The chartered banks are sizable institutions but periodically the- people hepeople of Canada, theoretically at any rate, tell them exactly what they may and may not do. The revision of the Bank Act provides that opportunity. If we cut oil, steel, power, min- ing, manufacturing or any ,one big. industrial group out of the pack and look at it separately we would` probably find that it had its trou- bles, too, and ownership would be - vested in a large number of share-' holderswho were bold enough to. risk their capital and make a big enterprise possible. Even in this day and age it is effective, before some audiences, to set up a straw man and then proceed to knock him down and jump on him. These so-called un- identified vested interests make - a good straw man. Let's all take a whack at him. THEO THE THISTLE SIFTER (Duncan Emrich in American Heritage Magazine) In the last century and-the—early part of the present one, elocution books, designed to "perfect the principles of perfect pronuncia- tion", enshrined in their pages such gems as: "I said 'a knap sack strap', not 'a knap sack's strap' "; his exclamation was "Chase stars!!" not "Chase tars!"; the old cold scold sold a school coal scuttle; bring me some ice, not some mice; and, "Did you say a notion or an ocean?" From The Huron Expositor April 30, 1880 Mr. S. B. Morris, of Brussels, recently shot a loon on the river near that place. He is having the bird stuffed. The Blyth salt works have been doing a rushing business in land salt this season, and some days the demand was greater than the supply. A few days ago man passed through Mitchell en route for Geor- gian Bay. He was making the journey with the aid of an ox team. He had his personal effects in a wagon, with the addition of the family cow attached to the', vehicle by a rope. Mr. Wm. Treaves, Seaforth, has been awarded the contract for the erection of the new town hall and market house in Clinton. The con- tract amounts to between six and seven thousand dollars. Mr. A. Elcoat, of Tuckersmith, has two as fine thoroughbred hei- fer calves from leis Shorthorn cow as we have seen this season. Both Calves are being sucked by the one cow and are as sleek and fat as it is possible for them to be. It is often said that Durham cows are poor milkers .and that they do not produce milk enough for their own calves. This, however, does` not hold good in the case of Mr. Elcoat. Mayor- Beattie, of Seaforth, has been confined to his residence for a week with a sore hand, and while writing got some ink on it, and it is supposed the ink poison- ed the wound His hand and arm are badly swollen and inflamed, and the pain is almost insuffer- able. The Fordwich 'butter factory will be run again this season with increased facilities: Operations will eentinetfce the firat week in May. it. paid well last ryear, and prospects are faYorable for'.a bets ter business this reason. tt The game of the" tongue twister —for the edification and amuse- ment of young and old—consists in repeating the shorter twisters three or four times rapidly from memory without stumbling. With the longer ones, once through is enough. To read them • aloud, however, is relatively simple, and does not count. By way, then, of a small an- thology for a rainy afternoon or a wintry evening around the fire, try these: She sells sea shells by the sea shore. She sells sea shells at the sea shore. At the sea shore she sells sea shells She sells sea shells on the sea shell shore. The sea shells she sells are sea shore shells Of that I'm sure. If neither he sells sea •shells, nor she sells sea shells, Who shall sell sea shells? Shall sea shells be sold? You can try these with the "s" and "sh" grouping: Some shun sunshine; Do you shun sunshine? The sun shines on the shop signs. Some snuff shop snuff; Do you snuff shop snuff? - Sarah saw a shot silk sash shop full of shot silk sashes as•the sunshine "shone on the side of the shot silk sash shop. Sheep shouldn't sleep in a shack. Sheep should sleep in a shed. Silly Sally swiftly shooed seven silly sheep; The seven silly sheep Silly Sally shooed shilly shallied south. The classic tongue twister is, of course, "Peter Piper": Peter Piper picked a peck of pick- led peppers. Did Peter Piper pick a peck of pickled peppers? If Peter Piper picked a peck of pickled peppers? Where's the peck of pickled pep- pers Peter Piper picked? Two hardy favorites, almost as popular as "Peter Piper", are 'Bitty Batter" and "Theophilus Thistle", both of whom have their problems: Bitty tatter 'bought some • butter, "Rut" said 'rhe, "this butter's bitter. If I put it in my batter, It will make my batter bitter." So she bought some better butter. And she put the better butter in. the bitter batter, And made the bitter batter better, Theophilus Thistle; the successful thistle sifter, While sifting a sieve full of un - shifted thistles, Thrust three thousand thistles through the thick of his thumb. Now if Theophilus Thistle, while sifting a sieve full of unsifted thistles, Thrust three thousand thistles through the thick of his thumb. See that thou, while sifting thistles Thrust not three thousand thistles through the thick of thy thumb. Success to the. successful thistle sifter! • A SMILE OR TWO A struggling author had caped on a publisher to inquire about a manuscript he had submitted. "This is quite well written," ad- mitted the publisher, "but my firm only publishes work by writers with well-known names." z "Splendid!" shouted the caller in great excitement. "My name's Smith!" Mrs. Jones recently visited a friend's farm and was started to see a full-grown rooster setting on a net. ' Noticing Mrs. Jones' as- tonishment, the thrifty farm wo- man explained: "He broke his leg and I'm not going to have him sit- ting around all day doing nothing. So I gave him some eggs to hatch 4 to earn his keep." Clancy, a rookie cop, caught a thief breaking into a jewellery store one dark night. "Ha," Clancy said. "Caught in the act, eh? You'll do plenty of time for this, me boy! "Look," said the thief, "I know* my rights. I want to call my lawyer. Let me go in -that cigar store and call him and have him meet me at the police station!" Sp Clancy let the thief go into the cigar store and the thief kept right -on going out the back win dow. Clancy didn't see him .until six months later when he met the little erook coming out of a jewel- lery store with his hands full of rings and bracelets. Clancy grab- bed the loot and the looter. "Ha," Clancy exulted. "I've got you with the goods this time, Come along with me!" "I got to call my lawyer," the crook protested as they passed a cigar store. "You won't fool me this tine," said Clancy. "Here. Hold these rings and . bracelets and give me your lanwhiyer's pbone number. I'1l- • 1 • • r 1