The Huron Expositor, 1870-12-09, Page 1'of the esa
e 8, IleK st-
arling rain.
ve property,
iimal away.
-,COMNIUN.
155-1*-
e- --
V. •
f the sub-
th
eer, coming
the right
, to prove
id take the
VN,
'r€pt P. 0.
541- -
e sub-
, Lon-
gueker-
{ALL RIM
-ted to prove
ie her away.
KER.
154-4-*
Iirwak
'Rises of the
a one year
to be brin-
houlders, no
on the belly,
whereabouts
ankfully re-
Sei
a Stanley.
'men. P. 0.
155-3-•
N
-Wage popee
aymente mad
iytt
.GALL,
gent and
ener, Seaforth,
siker,
if.o• rth
ABL
to inform the
;pened a New
"Aim with .hia
be aceommad
,s and vehicles,
97-tf.
a -TM.
remises of the
eith Boundary
last June, 2
(ere all red ex -
of the heifers
mcl a little epot
fl markei be -
the left ear. -
information as
r will be suite -
ills Green P.O.
155-4-2*
- _---
of1869.
RENT Ai trIR
made an as -
tame, and the
net at the store
telv carried on
village of Ain-
' Huron, on Fri-
tecember A.D.
[eve -a o'ciock in
statements of
Aesignee.
.?,tst day of No-
WATSON..
iterfirt Assignee.
-
RTHERSHIP.
17 GIVEN that
!- some time past
rirv Cardiff and
• 'rna of Cardiff,
eyville, in the
ems and grocers,
so mutual eon -
!tore be carried
; and the said
Aiarge all debts
account of the
the County of
verriber, 1870s
X- CARDIFF.
'aF. ELLIOTT
156 --
Obi",
A,FOiRTH.
enkful for past
nate to the in -
aid surrounding
en hand a Large,
t
313GGIES,
&c.,
:Best Mate-
Irt test Styles.
for WINTER
MEAP FOR
asers wo,ild do
)efore purchasing-
R.ZINTC4-
aded to.
;tand ; First
the Foun-
St.
MORRISON
-
111.-
-
=
-
WM. F. LUXTON,
*it
"-Freedom in Trade -Liberty in R
'10g•MMErlil
ion -Equality in Civil Righ(s".
EDTIOR & PUBLISHER.
VOL. 4, NO.
SEAFOR'ill, FRIDAY,
ECEMBER 9, 1870.
BUSINESS CARDS.
MEDICAL
TRA.017, M. D„ Coroner for the
Its- County of Huron. Office and Re-
sidence -One doorEa,st of the Methodist
Episcopal Church.
Seaforth, Dec. 14th, 1868. 53-ly
1 ) C. MOORE, N. D., C. M. (Graduate,
Pc. of McGill University, Montreal,)
Physician, Surgeon, &a. Office ancl resi-
dence Zurich, Ont.
Zurich, Sept. 7th,. 1870.
144
T AMES STEWART, M. D., C. M.,
e) Graduate of McGill University,
Montreal. Physician, ,Surgeon, &c. Of-
fice and residence M. Coox's.
Varna.
TIT:, W. R. smrra, Physician, Sur-
geon, etc. Office, -Opposite Scott
Robertson's Rest lence - Main -street,
North.
Seaforth, Btec. 14, 1863. 53-1y
IT. VERCOE, M. D. C.' Physi-
• PE, ASANT SOU
A - -
The soun s of church,bells p
- In the erowded city's w
Speaking eace ,t the weary
And idding it rest to p
DS.
aling,
Y,.
spirit,
Ifry
is labors,
s still.
The chime from the hoary be
O'er al •,ing valley and I
When the
Or th
reaper rests frbm
busy plough stan
The rush f the rain in surn
On the p ;robed and thir
Like the tears that lighten t
Of th sorrow that, -gave
The drow y caw from the el
er
The s nof the lark at
And the sand of the breeze
The b llows of ruset cor
The echo from breezy upland
Of the tinkline sheep -be
The hum pf the bee as it goe
To and. fro o'er the fragr
The song from a -lip thou lov
The sound of the eirnple
Thou hest warbled. and loved
A d the voice of infant
er
ty earth,
e bosom
hem bir h.
-trees,
orn,
rustling
's chime:
h
nt thini
st,
lays
child tio d
raise.
'. , dials, Surgeons etc. Office and Ite-
sidei ce, corner of Market and High ROUCH1NC IT IN THE BUSH
Street, leo mediately in rear of Kield's
Store. OR , l
1
,LIFE IN CANIAD
-
Seaforth, Feb. 4th. 1870. 53-1y.
T CAMPBELL, M. D. C. M., (Gradu- : BY. MRS. MOODIE.
0.1 . ate of McGill University, Montreal)
-o-
Physician, Surgeon, etc., Seaforth. Office •
and Residence -Old Post Office Building, ,
up stairs, where he will be found by Quebec.
night or day -when at home.
Seaforth. July 15th, 1869 48-1y.
CHAPTER II.
LEGAL.
trj F. WALKER. Attorney -at -Law
aud Solicitorin-Chancery, Con-
veyancer, Notary Public, &c. Office of
the Clerk ef the Peace, Court House,
Gocierich, Ont.'•
N.B.-Money to lend at 8 per cat on
Farm Leeds.
Goclerich, deify. as. 1870. 112-1y:
ir AUG 1-1-2Y & OLMSTEA D,
1311 Barristers, Attorneys at Law, Sol-
icitors in Chancery end Insolvency, No-
taries Public and Conveyancars. &shah
tors fee the 11.0. Bank, Seeforth, Agents
for the Canada Life Assurance Co.
N. 13.-$30,000 to lend at 8 per cent.
Farms, Houses and Lots for sale.
Seaforth, Dec. llth, 1808. 53-tf.
,
-DENSON & MEYER, Barristers and
Attorneyat Law, Solicitors in Chaa'h
eery and_ Insolvency,. Conveyancers, No-
aries Public, etc. Oftices,-Seaforth and
Wroxeter. Agents for the Trust and
Loan Co. of Upper Canada, and the Col-
onial Securities Co. of Landon, England.
Money at 5 per cent ; no commsision,
charged.
TA.s. H. RENsoN, W. C. NEYER.
Seaforth, Dec. 10th 1868. 53-1y.
_ DENTAL.
G. W. HARRIS, L. D.S.
Arti 'ficial Dentures inserted
with all the latest improve-
ments. The greatest mire taken for the
preservation of decayed e
and tnder teeth.
Teeth extracted withoset pain. Rooms
over McDougall's Store.
Seaforth. Dec. 14, 1868. ly.
HOTELS.
-tiOMME RO1AL HOTEL, Abaleyvill e,
kJ James Laird, proprietor, afFerds
first-class accommodation for the travel-
ling Rulnic. The larder and bar aro al-
ways. supplied with. the best the niarlse
ts affercl., Excellent stabling in connec-
tion.
A inieyville; April 237 1869. 70-tf.
TT (AX'S HOTEL (LATE SHARP'S)
1‘. The undersigned begs to thank the
public fertile liberal patronage awarded
to him in times past in the hotel business,
and also to inform them that he has again
resumed, . business in the above stand,
• where he will be happy to have a call
from olci friends, and many new ones.
THOMAS KNOX.
Seaforth; May 5, 1870_ 126-tf.
IQ RIT I SH EXCHAN GE I -I OTEL, G °d-
i) erich, Ober.,_ J. CALLAWAY, PROPRI-
e
EToR • J. S. 1,11eraghets, (ate of Ameri-
can Hotel, Warsaw, N. l,.:.) Manager.
This hotel has recently ben newlyfur-
nished, and refitted throughout, ancl is
now one of the close comfertable and. com-
modious in the Province. • Good Sample
Rooms for Commercial Travellers.
ON the 22nd of September, the anchor
was weeighed. and we bade a 1 ng farc-
well to Grosse Isle. Ae our V6S el '
st
struckinto mid -channel, I cast a lc
lingering look at the beautif 1 shores
were leaving. Cradled in he arms
the St. Lawrence, and. bas ng in t e
bright rays of the morning sun, the
land and its sister group 1 oked hk4 a
•young Eden just emerged fro the w t-
.ers of chaos. The day wa warm, a d/
•the cloudless heavens of ti atipecel'ar
azure tint which gives to t u e (tanedi n
skieS and. waters a brilliancy nknown lin
-,ciore nor hern latitudeshe air tiVa,s
ure and lastic, the sun silo e, out With
incommoI splendour, liglitrig up t
ehanging woods with a rich tntellow c
'miring, co eposed of a thous
and vivid dyes. . The migh
ed flash.ing., and sparkling
pelled by a strong breeze, a
short rolling surges with a c
foam.
Never shall I forget that s
-e
of
from Grose Isle to Quebec
redall, aft r the lapse of so
e eery object that awoke i
emotions lof. astonishment ,
What wet derful combinatien
1 -
id brillia t
'river re i-
nward,
d tipped' ts
est ofeno y
ort voyage
Is
I love to
oney yea .s,
my bre st
nd della t.
s of beau iy,
and grencleurand power, at every wi cl-
ing of tha -aoble river !
Every erception of ' my ind beea
h
e
absorbed te t e one sens of seei
°ce
when upo i rounding Point evi, we c st
anchor be ore Quebec. • Wh t a scene !-
Can the world produce s ch another?
Edinburg had been the .bect 1. ideal to ilne
of all th t was beautiful i 1 Nature a
vision f the northern Ili bla,eds bad
haunt° 0 y dreams acrost tie Atlantic;
but all,l ese past recellectio s 'faded le -
fore th resent of Quebec! Nature h4ad
lavished all her grandest dements to
form this astonishing pallor. ma. Th re
frowns t e cloud -capped m untain, . and
below, t e cataract foams a lel thundets ;
Wood, a cl. rock and rive combine to
lend their aid in making th picture per-
fect, and Worthy of its Divi e Originatbr.
The pr cipitious hank up n which tb:e
city lies iled, reflecting in he still deep
waters a v its base, greatly( nhanc s the
romantic beauty of the sit, iatiom • !Ile
mellow a d sereee glow l of •he autemeal
day har anima so peefec ly erith the
solemn g •ancleur of the sees e around me,
and san so silently and d eply inte ray
soul, up, kiy spi-it fell preetrate 'before
it, and I melted. mvoluatar y into teers. ,
The pl asure we; experie i ced upon ur
first glan e at Quebec was eatly dat, p-
ed by th sad. convictiou th t the cholq‘a.
raged -wi, hin her walls, whi st the alm )st
ceaseless tolling (:) bells • roclaimed a
m.ournfu tale of Woe and deo th. Scarce-
ly a pers n visited the ye setwho was
not in 1)1 ck, or who spoke lot in tones
of subdu d grief: :They a visecl as not
to go on shore if -we value( our lives, as
stranger niost commonly- fell the first
victims •o the fatal malady. This wai to
m' e a sev re disappointmen) who felt an
intense c esire to climb to he ,crown of
the rock and survey the ncble landscape
at my fe t. I yielded at la t the wish-
-es Of my husband,. who dir. n t himself
resist th temptation in. his own person,
and en.d avored to content Myself with
the me, ns of enjoyment laeed within
ray reach. My eyes were •eVer tired. of
-wander" • g over the scene efte me.
It is 9 srious to observe h w differently
ts which call fart intense ed-
it' scone minds wil effect others.
'ch dragoon, Mac tenzie, •seein
I
long and ietently ; t the distan
Montmorency, dry y ghee rved.
• ay be a' yore fine.; 1ut it looks
r to rey thinken hain hanks o'
•o' hung out o'er 1 e bushes"
1," c ied another, "thee fa's are
nie ; ' s a brew la d, nee doubt;
ust s brew as aul • S otland."
t, ma ! hauld yo levees, we
be 1 irds here," sad a -third t
mau wait a m cl4e time be-
y w d think au i ht of you at
Terms liberal. the obje
Goderich, April 14, 1870. 123-tf. miratio
The Sco
^
MISCELLANEOUS:
epl HAZLEHURST, LicensedAuction-
• p, cer for the County of Huron. God.-
erich, Ont- Particular attention 'paid to
the - sale of Bank-i•upt Stock. Farm
Stock Sales attended on Liberal Terms.
Goods Appraised, Mortgages Foreclosed,
Landlord's Warrants Executed. Also,
Bailiff First Division Court for Huron.
• Goclerich, June 9th. 1869 76.tf
Cr& W. MepHILLIPS, Provincial
„ Land Surveyors, Civil Ene,ineers,
etc. All manner of Conveyancing done
with neatness and dispatch. G. McPhil-
lips, Commissioner in B. R. Office -
Next door with. of Sharp's Hotel, Sea -
forth.
Seaforth, -bee. 14, 1868. •53-ly.
• me look
-Falls of
It
na' bett
white
" We
just bo
but no'
" Ho
shall a'
"and y
'fore th
name."
I we
trava,ge.
some o
sight of
ed the
qu.ence.
ed, the
pulsive
naost.di
not 4 little amused at the ex-
t ex ectatione eiitertained by
our teerage pat engers. The
the 0 nadian shor s laad chang-
intt personsi o great cons*
The II oorest and t e worst-dressi-
east-deserving and the most re-
in mind and mo als,exhibited
gusting traits of s lf ' pariance.
Vanity and. presu
sees them altoget
ly of the rank an
nections at ho
great sacrifices t
to join brothers
foolishly settled i
enlcountry. Gil
able to wash a flo
service with cont
change' their res(
twelve .dollars a
to undeceive the
gracious task.
with s vetal with
time ad 'bitter
them their sob
the re onstraac
I
ption seemed to p08-
r. They talked I oud-
wealth of their con-
,• and lamented the
y had made in order
nd cousins who had
this beggardly wood -
who were' scarcely
decettly, talked of
pt, unless tempted to
ution by the offer of
onth. To endeavour
was a useless and -1111-
fter haVing tried it
nt success, I left it to
experience to restore
k senses. In spite of
of the captain, and
the dred of the ch lera, they all rinhed
en shore to inspect the land of Goshen
and to •end.eavor t
anticipatioes.
. We *ere favou
er our arrival, w
the h e 41 tb -officers
both the gentle
Grave, tnelancho
talk -ed much an
veiling disorder,
strangers escapin
ages. 1This was
seevedi to clepre
mind e'shich, a.fte
antido es ageism
The cabin seemed
to circnlate more
ture ofl these pro
captain, as if by
dition4 glass of g
chre gloom their
The Visit of th
by that of swo of
toms ;4 -vulgar, il
ing theMselves at
familia
stare 1
dialog
Cus
quirie
sel) :
tain.
Cap
Ofii
'know'
depen
PaP
men,
ef tern
10f11
sere t
Bann)
'Cap
feW
few d
Bot
Firs
ed, Se
Cap
yes;
the br
Offi
bush).
My.
slide
the o
worth
drels
then
this b
resist
they
lanes
brand
relish
passe
with
nod to tl
t us, col
e ;-
m -house
as to the
•Any goo(
in (gruffly
: " Best
Th 011
realize their • absurd
(id, a few minutes aft-
th visit from
; but in this instance
en were Canadians.
y -looking . men, who
ominously of the prc-
hd imposaibility o
from its fearful ray -
tot very consoling, ant
e the cheerful toue o
all, is one of the bee
-1 this awful scourge.
to lighten, and the Leis
reely, after the depae-
eSsional ravens. The
Instinct, -• took an wi-
ng, to shake off sepul-
wesence hadinspired.
docsors was followed
he officials of the Cus-
terate men, who, seat -
he cabin table, with a.
8 captain, and blank
lammed the following
deer (after making in-
Sneral cargo of the ves-
brandy on board, cam
:•,, Yes."
remedy for the cholera
y one the doctors can
upon." s"
in (takine the hint) : "Gentle
11 send yes up a dozen b ttlts thi
-thank you. We ar
get it ge wine from y u. An
rgh ale in ,our frieght ?
in (with a slight slung) "
dreds in eses. I'll send You
en with t e brandy.
" Capit
officer: Any short, large -bowl -
I
tch pipes, • 'th metallic lids?"
in (quite !impatiently) :
11 send yo some to sthoke, with
ndy.-Whet else V •
r : " We will now proceed
eaders wo , d have 'laughed as
Ould they 1 ave seen how doggedl
man sh ok his fist after thes
they
looke
side t
starle
cold
seem.(
the t.
before
most
and
silffic
the
time
light.
ap cl N
tion
- to Iee
had ji
berth;
ell dile
her
aware
its, I .
thend
i He
that -
fetal'
her il
dark.i
her 11
mastFemig -,
sprit
A722/6,
free
ther
brig
U
ing o
'Daniel ladder,
}
ment vhen the
gethei . The s
shout: a:iil tath,
arlsii g of the d
cnse darkn
a most a
aptain 'w'
in the g
who we
ees.
h great (
to acco
ueried off
e deck, an
nless to awa
en tranqui
h in. mind
rofound sl
he sun -ha
sencircled %
clouds
ght .,:- the
ant hills
which -roll
s had lef
he mut
riling to
e-feeed m
✓ complan
11, put us
t sea, I'd
and ale
rds nigh
ers retut
eir . first
eclared to
a ;Treat de
an it did
night clo
ind.s an
to have in
rid to the rigid zone. wo hour
my light ummer clothi ig was al
nsupporta )1e, and now a heav
11 -lined pl id _formedbiit an i
nt screen fram the incl mency
ather. Alter watching for SOM
e singular effect produocl by th
n the tow reflected in t e water
ary with Thug day o anticipa
d. excitem nt, 1 made u my mini
e the dec and retire t
st settled
when the
crash th
-hole frau
of the real
moped me
ascended
scene
sffies desc
r, the II°
ition, an
The Ann(
lucky nei rhbour a h
vessel, w
nte on 1.)
as direct'
. the vessel. " Scoun
ered to .himself ; an
'They reit us
.nner, and We dare no
, for fear of the troubl
a If I had those vil
give them a taste o
that' they w uld no
• most of th
d, greatly d
isit to the ci
ie a filthy 1
U better from
11 shore. A
ed accom
drizzling r
de a sudden
steerag
ssatisfie
y, whic
ale, tha
he ship'
(lark am
a,nied. b
in. W
leap -fres'
rest.
own my. baby in hb
, with
througl
but 110
ung OVe
abin, am
versel Artie
sent a shive
e. Alarmed,
danger that
way to the
o the deck.
of, confusion
ptiou. By soi
Ailey HW had change
ran. .foul ,of ' us in th
was. a small brig, an.
a y, three
ed Irish
her bow-
ws of the
mable to
embrace,
the poor
• struggle'
was go -
the coin-
itical Ind
prevailez
ie strang
1
th three h.
ard ; and at
, across the b
and she anchored, and
emelt ' fro • the deadly
was no s all . danger of
ing clown n the unequa
ble to co iprehend wha
I raised- • y head abov
ust at thee
10
t e
tic
The
bull,
wo e
his kr
Wil
wore
mat
on t
dar
ed bo
to a
way
stor
the
the
mis
essels were gr ppled tot
rieks of the wbmen, the
of the men, and the
gs in either ship, aide
ss of the night in pro-
ful and stunt hag effec
s raging like
asp of seve
e clinging, sh
a chafe1.
al franti •
ieking,I
• culty I per4iaded the
pany me be ow. The
with the cab' light up -
we were lef in tot4l
t the result.
• ity was restor d, fati
and in body, I sunk
ep, and did i ot awake
risen high. :hove the
rtress of Qu bec. T e
ad all disper ed du
ir was clear a d balmy
ere robed in_ blue, so
d around the in flee
is
1
•
;
Ones
11111111111•11MININNESININIMPI
volumes. As the beams of the sun pene-
rated their shadoWy folds; they gradu-
ally drew up like a:curtain, and. dissolv-
ed like wreaths of emoke in the cleareir.
During the day, many of our pass ng -
ere took their departure ; tire A -of 1 the
close confinement of the ship, and the
long voyage, they were too impatie t to
remain on board until we reached on -
amid. - The mechanics obtained instant
employment, and the girls who were' old
enough to work, procured situations as
servants in the city. Before night our
_lumbers were greatly reduced. TII4. old
Iragoon and his family, two Scotch fid-
dlers of thename of Duncan, a Hight nd-
et called . Tam Grant, and his wife and
ittle son, and our . own party31 were all
.that remained of the- scventy-two pas-
'engers that left the Port of Leith the
ri Anne.
- In spite of the earnest entreati of
his young wife, the said Tam Grant, who
vas the most merciful fellow in the w rld,
vould insist upon going on shore to see
11 thelions of the place. "Ah, Tam!
am !.ye will die 6' the cholera," cried.
lie weeping Maggie. "My- heart will
rak if ye dinn.a. bide wi.' me an" the baim
ie." Tam was as deaf as Ailsa Craig.
legardlese of tears and entreaties, he
umped into the beat, like a wilful iman
s he was, • and my. husband went With
un. Fortunately for me the latter re-
urned safe to the 'vessel, itt time to pro -
e84 with her to .Montreal, itt tow of the
ioble steamer British America ; but
am, the volatile Tam, was missing.
uring the reign of the cholera, wh+t
'nother tine would have appeared but
trifling imam* was now invested with
doubt and terror. The distress of, the
poor wife knew no bounds. I thitk I
see her now. as I •sawher then, si ting
upon thelltloor of the deck, her lead
!burred between her knees, rocking hers
f to nila fro, .64 weening in the i tter
bendonment of her grief. " He is d ad!
e is dead! *My (ear, dear Tam! The
pestilence hos sized upon him ; a d. I
told the puif bairn are left alone in the
strange land." • All attempts at con ola-
tion were uieless.;* she obstinately r fus-
ed to listen to probabilities, or to be DM.
forted. All through the night I h ard
iher deep and bitter sobs, and the of -re-
pented name of him that she had los
The sun was sinking over the pl gue-
stricken city. gilding the changing w sods
and. mountain peaks with ruddy li rht.;
the river mirrored_ back the gore ous
sky, and moved in:billows a liquid old;
the Very air seeined lighted_ up 'th
heavenly:fires, andi. sparkled with yri-
ads of luminous particles, as I gaze • my
last upon that beautiful scene.
The tow -line wag now attached rem
'our ship to the .13riitish America, an.' in
company with tcre other vessels, we fol -
limed fast in her, foaming wake. Day
lingered en the horizon just long en ugh
te enable me to examine, with dee in-
terest, the rocky heights of Abra am,
the scene of aur immortal Wolf's vi tory
tvInd death ; and When the twilight f cled
ieto night. the moon arose in so emu
beauty, and cast mysterious gleamipon
the strange,. stern, landscape. The ide
river, flowing, rapidly between its ru ged
banks, •rolled in inky blackness beneath
the overshadowing crags ; while the
waves tin midchainiel flashed aim a in,
dazzling light, rendered more inten e by
the surtosinding darkness. In this] imi-
nous track the huge steamer glided ma-
jestically forwards flinging -showe s of
red -earth stars from the funnel int the
clear air, and looking like some fiery
demon of the night enveloped 'in s oke
and flame-
• The lofty groves of pine frowned ( own
in hearse -like gloom upon the m'ghty
river, and the deep tillness of the n'ght,
broken alone by its hoarse wailing, lied
my mind with sad forbodinge-alas ! too
prophetic of the future.
From these sad reveries. 1 was e used,
by the hoarse notes of the bagpipe. 'hat
well-known sound brought every Scotch -
man upon deck. and eet every. limb in
motion on the deck of the other v se s.
Determined not to be outdone, ou fid-
dlers took up the strain, and a 1 vely
contest ensued between the rival m
which continued during the gr 'Etter
part of the night The shouts of misy
reve rt- were in no war congeniel t my
feelings. Nothing teni
ds so -much t n-
creaie our melancholy as merry usic
whei the heart is sad ; and I lef the
seen with eyes brimful of tears, ani my
min painfully agitated by sorrowfu rec-
collections and- vain regrets.
Itro BE CONTINUED.)
4* • 110'
High-flown Phraseolo
•
Amongst all the iMprovements o the
age; none perhaps are more striking than
those winch have recently been .n ade,
and indeed are at presentemaking, ji the
language of ordinary life. Who in hese
days, ever reads of boarding-schoo s ?-
Nobody. They are transformed int aca-
demies for boys, and seminaries for r irls ;
the higher classes are " Establishme • ts.",
A 9oa-chmaker's shop is a "Reposita y for
Carriages ;" a milliner's shop a "De mt;"
a thread -seller's an "Emporium." One
buys drugs at a 'Medical Hall ;" ines,
of a "Company ;" and shoes at a "M rt."
Blacking is .dielpensed from an "Tie titu-
tion ;" and '..eat from a " Purve or."
_One would itnagine that the word 'hop
- bad not on13 become .contemptible. but
had. been discoveeed not, to belong t the
English language. Now -e -days, -al the
• shops are "Warehouses," or "plac s 'of
business," and .you will hardly ti d a
tradesman having the honest hat hood
to call himself a. shopkeeper. • Th re is
now also no such word as that of ts Von
that is to say. among ears polite; 'clo-
thier" has been discovered to be more
elegant, although for our part the term
tailor is every it as respectable. This
new mode of paraphrasing the len age
of ordinary life; however redicul•us it
may ha some instances be, is not h f so
absurd as the newspaper fashion of using
high-flown terms in speaking of very
i •
common -place occurrences. For instance,
instead of reading that after a ball the
company did not go away till daylight,
we a -re told that the joyous group con-
tinued. tripping on the light fantastic toe
• until Sol ga.Ve them warning to depart
If one of the company happened on his
way to tarable into a diteh, we should be
informed that "his foot slipped, and he
was immersed in the liquid element." A
good supper is described as making "the
tables groan with every delicacy of the
season." A crowd -of briefless lawyers,
enbeneficed clergymen and half -pay offi-
cers, are enumerated as -host of fashion"
at a watering -place, wh•ere we are also
informed that lathes, instead of taking a
dip before breakfast, "plunge themselves
fearlessly into the bosom of "Neptune."
A sheep killed by lightning is a thing un-
• heard of: the animal may lte destroyed
by the • 'electric fluid ;" but, even. then,
we shall not be told that it was dead. :
we should he informed that that "the
vital spark had fled for ever." If the
carcass were picked up by a carpenter or
shoemaker, we never should hear that a
journeyman tradesman had round it ,•
we should be told that its remains had
been discovered by an 'operative artizan.'
All little girls, be their faces ever so plain,
pitted, or pitiable, if they appear at a
public office to complain of robbery or ill-
treatment, are invariable "intelligent and
/interesting." If they have proceeded very
far in crime, they ere called "unfortu-
nate females." Child -murder is elegantly
termed. "infanticide ;" and when it is
punished capitally, we bear, not that the
unnatural m,other was hanged, but that
"the unfortunate culprit underwent the
last sentence of the law, and was launch-
ed into eternity." No person read.s itt
-the newspapers that a house has been
burned down -he perhaps will find. "that
the house fell a, sacrifice to the flames."
In an account of a launch, we learn, not
that the ship went off the slip without
any accident, but that "she glided se-
curely and majestically into, her native
element; the said native element being
one in which the said ship never was be-
fore. To send for a. surgeon, if one's leg
be broke, is 'out of the question; a man
indeed 'mat= be dispatched for medical
aid." There are now no public singers
at tavern dinners ; they are "the profess -
'lanai gentlemen ;" and actors are all
!" professors of the histrionic art" Wi-
dows are scarce; they are all "intereet-
hag relicts; and as for nursery -maids.
they are now-a-daya universally trans-
formed into " young persons who super-
intend the junior branches of the family."
-Anonymous;
The Portland "Oregonian" tells this
story :-A few days ago a politician of
this city purchased a load PI wood anol
had. it hauled. home.. Scarcely bad it been.
• dumped. on the earth, when a Chinaman
applied, with bucksaw in hand for a job.
Says the judge, "Row much ee ?" "Hap
dollar," promptly replied John. ''Cheap
enough,' said the Judge; but just then a
stalwart American citizen came along and
applied for the job. To the inquiry of
the judge the American citizen replied
that he would charge a dollar and. a half.
Judge: •Well, John Chinaman here
offers to do It for four bits: but as I had
rather have a white man to do my work, •
I'll give you a dollar and half," There-
upon John Chinaman went sorrowfully
away, and the judge went his way. Re-
turning soritC hours afterwards the judge
was almost street dumb with astonish-
ment to find a Chinaman engaged in saw-
ing his wand pile, with neer a white man
in sight. Judge to John -"Who told you
to saw this wood ?" John to judge-
" Melioan Man," and. John described in
pantomine end bad Melican lingo. Judge
smelled large mice -his employer was his
employe of the Morning. "Howmuchee ?'
again queriel the judge. And again 'ame
the prompt .reply, "Hap dollar." So the
judge's'wood pile was sawed. by a China-
man, after all, but he paid a white man's
price ; and now the judge thinks he is
ahont a dollar short in hie finances, on
'account of the uncertainty of a white
man.
-1-
A story iS told of a boy who was wateb-
ing his school fellows as they snow - balled
an old gentleman's -windows. The _ old
gentleman rushed. out of his house, de-
termined. if poisible, to inflict some severe
punishment on the offender, saying, when
he caught the boy, "Now, you young
rascal, I'll thrash you within an inch of
your life !" Accordingly he began to beat
him, when the boyimmerliately conimenc-
ed laughing, and continued until the old
• man stopped beating him, with the ex-
clamation, • 'Boy, what are you laughing
at ?" "Well," said the boy, "I'm laugh-
ing because you are awfully sold' : I ain't
the'boy ?"
-.41$
WHOLE NO. 157
VARIETIES., /4
The best thing to give the poor -em-
ployment 1
Some men take more care to hide their
wisdom then their folly.
The tobaeco-chewer is like a goose ia.
a dutchtoven-always on the spit.
Men are like potatoes -they do not
know how se on they may be in hot water.
'What is hone without a mother V as
the young girl said. when She sent the old.
lady to chop wOod. =
i
Why is a dog with a, braken leg like a
boy at arithmetic? -Becan.se • he puts
down three axd carries one. .
If yen would be miserable, look with-
in. If you would. be distracted, look
around. If you would be happy, look up.
Every lady who educates her servants
into greater truthfulness, fidelity, and
orderly ways of life, is doing missionary
work of the best lort. -
A little one, after undergoing the .un-
pleasant operation of vaccination, ex-
claimed: "New I won't haYe to be
baptized, will I 1"
An eccentric but observant Englieh
traieller says that he has travelled three
times round the globe, and seen but two
classes of People -men and women.
We have heard many women eonaplain
of their husbands' neglect of home. A
spoonful of bone e will keep more bees in
the hiv-e than will ten of vinegar. ,
"Now, Johnny, if Willie would hurt
you, like a good bey you would forgive
him, vrouidn't you ? ' Johnny-" Yis,
ma'am, if T couldn't catch,him.'
Hope awakens courage while despon-
dency is the lasttoi all evils; it is the
abandonment of good-th e giving up of
the battle of life with dead nothingless.
• Severe an the Drug Clerk. -Maid of
all work.±"Please, err, Miesus says you
will please take a teaspoonful of that per -
seriph.= before I brings it home to her."
My laudiady, eaid she than, makes her
tea so strong that it breaks the cups. -
And. mine said another, Makes hers so
weak it c n't run out of the tea-pot
One of he sable oratoraof old. Virginia
made a g od point wheni he said, "De
oyster go mo sense clan some folks,
'cause he know when to keep his mouth
shu"1t;rill you dake surnding ?" said 4 Ger-
nian teetotaller to a friend, while stand-
ing nes.i. a tavern. "I don't care if I do,"
was the reply. "Vent den, let's dake a
valle." ' •
A gentleman in one of the back . town-
ships says, in a note accompanying a let-
ter for publication in the "Daily T-ele-
graph :"-"I sumtimes missspell a word,
and it's possible I have spelt parleement
rong."
"Jim I believe Sambo has got no truth
in him. "You don't know, dere am more
truth in dat nigga clan all (le plantation."
"How do you make that out ?" "Why
he neber let's any out,"
A charitable man was boasting to Lord
Palmerston, "I spend half my income in
charity, I assure you ;, I do indeed! I
give thousands of pounds away. Gener-
osity covers everything." '''' Including
modesty, sometimes," added his Lord-
ship. .
The proprietor of _a forge, not remark-
able for his correctness of language but
who by holiest industry, had reali;ed a
considerable independence, being: called
on at a social meeting for a toast, gave,
• '
Success to forgery !"
Mrs. P rtington wants to know if it
were notintended that *women should
drive thei husbands, why are they put
through the bridal ceremony? There
• seems to be something plausible in the
supposition, for nearly all the ladies are
providing themselves with switches.
One day when Erskine was, as usual,
on his way to Westminster Hall, with his
large bag full of briefs, he was aecosted.
by, a Jew boy, who asked. hira if he was a
dealer in old clothes "No, you young
Hebrew nnp," replied the counseller,
" these are ell new suits."
A wealthy,Kentueltian, returning from
a Southern tour, dropped into a Memphis
resta.uran for oyeters, and was amazed.
, atlaving thein brought to him by his
twelve -y ar-ohl boy, who had run away
from home. The olcl man look the pro-
digal in hand, and an advanced telegram
urged the immediate slaughter of the fat-
ted calf.
Josh Billings thus speaks of a new agri-
cultural implement, to which the atten-
tion of farmers is invited: John Rogers'
revolving, expanding, unceremonious,
self -greasing, and self-righteous hoss-rake
is now and forever offered to the gener-
ous publik. These rakes are az eazy to
keep in repair az a hitching -post, and will
rake up a paper of pins sowed broad-kast
in a ten aker lot of wheat stubble. These
rakes can be used in winter for a hen -
roost, or be sawed up in stovewood for
the kitchen fire. No farmer of good mo-
ral karrakter skould be without this rake,
even if he hasto steal one.
tington- h key,
e---40-4-0,„,areazztiv-7-------iscaeystomtrse
I'v . Par -
that people' adopt when they are disposed
to be philoeophical or moral --"I've al-
ways n.oticed that every year added to a
man's life has a tenderneis to make him
older. I'm sure, too, I haven't got the
exorbitance of feellings that 1 once had,
and I don't believe I, shall ever have it
again live
to the a.ge of Methusale,
which gooAt:less knows, I don't want -
But I don't want to be a centurion; and
the idea of one surviving her factories,
and. becoming idiomatic, alvrayagives me
a dissagreeable consoriousness."
The otllier day some ladies went out
•
visiting There being a little two-year
e
old preset, one of the ladies asked if he
weaild kis her. He answered 'No."
"What is the reason you will not kiss
me s" "I'm too little to kiss you, papa
will kiss you. Ile kisses all the big girh5. '
The youngster was permitted to playwith
his toy. •
you how it vas. I drink mine
soy
all . t11 .
la, er ; den I put mine hand ori mine
he d and dere vas von pain. Den I put
mine hanhl on my body, and dere vos
anoder pain. • Den I put mine hand in
mine poc et and dere vas nothing. So
I tine mid de temperancl . Now dere is
no pain more in mine head, and de pain
in my body vas all gone. I put mine
hand in1 mine pocket. and dere was
twenty dollars. So I shtay mid de tem-
p
erance. . Let us be content, to work,
To do the thing we can, and not presuitie
To fret because it's little. 'Twill employ
Seven metn, they say. to make a perfect
Who ma es the head. eonsents to miss the
point; '
Who makes the point agrees to miss the
head;
And if a man should cry, "I want a pin,
And 1 mast make it straightway head
• Ws. wisdoand point,"twcwolt,rit,hBt.heBp.iBnhe
'wants..