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Zurich Herald, 1954-12-23, Page 6ONE SPOILED MAN "Dear Anne Hirst: I don't want pity, but I do need some advice to make my life more bearable, I am completely nib.- erable, . . . For five years I've been married to a man I love dearly—and he knows it, I wait on him like a baby (even lay out his clothes) and he never turns a hand to help me do anything, and I could count the words of affection he has spoken since we married. "We have two children, and live in a three-room house; you can picture hbw crowded we are. I do the best I can, but with the children to manage and all the work to do alone, I get discouraged. I am in a had nervous state — and when I'm sick my husband calls it imag- ination. That hurts. I haven't been to a doctor in nearly two years, "He seldom takes nie, any- where, except to a movie about twice a year. He does pay the bills; he doesn't let me have any money, though, and I've eek's S -w-ThrKty 'tee, ehe Peeelte ees,peeo Ideal for chilly 'clays of Fall and Winter! Make your tot this -piece separate outfit with its warm, pertly appliqued weskit! cake weskit to MIX and MATCH with whirlaway skirt and puff -sleeve blouse, other separates too! Pattern 4796: Children's Sizes 3, 4, 8, 8, 10, Size 6 blouse, 1 yard 35 -inch fabric; skirt 11/2 yards; weskit, % yard. This pattern easy to use, sim- ple to sew, ie tested for fit. Has complete illustrated instructions. Seri d THIRTY-FIVE CENTS (850) in coins (stamps cannot be accepted) for this pattern, Print plainly SIZE, N A M E, AD..RESS, STYLE NUMBER. Send order to Box 1, 123 Eigh- teenth St., New Toronto, Ont. needed clothes so desperately I've been ashamed to go to the store, Even then I have had to ask for them, which I hate to do. "He is good in some ways; he has an easy going disposition and we never quarrel. But his lack of appreciation, or even in- terest, has me at my rope's end. STARVED FOR KINDNESS" * Some wise person wrote • that the greatest human need * is appreciation. Without it the * most loving wife droops and * withers, If only. her husband * spoke a kind word occasion.- * ally, and treated her like a * person instead of an automa- * ton made to serve him! You * will have to assert yourself, * not resentfully, but firmly. A * man like your husband is not * going' to respect a woman as * an individual unless she re- * spects herself enough to de- mand it, I suggest you omit • some of these little personal • services you've been giving * him; if he complains, say * you're so discouraged that * you cannot accomplish now * all you once did, * If. only for the actual work * you perform in managing the * household, raising the child- * ren, cooking, cleaning, etc., * you deserve an allowance and * without having to beg for it. * Crowded as your daily living 4' is in such small space, you * need regular diversion more * than most housewives. You * need help with the children, * and when you are unwell. * there should be help provided * to keep the house in order. * How your spirits would lift if * only your husband would do " his share, and now and then * tell you how nice things look and how proud he is of the way you're bringing up the * children! * I suggest, first, that you go * to your doctor for a check-up, * Tell him just what you've told me, and then have him talk * with your husband. I think * that will make him realize * how miserable you are and * how much he can brigten your * daily routine. If he will, his * own life, too, will be far hap- * pier. * The ideal marriage is one in * which husband and wife try * to outdo each other in help- * fulness and appreciation. Your * life could be like that, if your * husband would only co-op- * prate, * Know that you have the * applause of another woman * who understands, and her best * wishes that this man of yours * will open his eyes to the lov- * ing service and attention he * gets every day from his over- • worked wife. MOTHER LETS HER DOWN "Dear Anne Hirst; Most wives who write you have trouble with their mothers-in-law. In my case, it*ha turned out the other way. My mother does not like my husband. Once she sep- arated us,. but I have sworn that will never happen again. "Lately I have seen her for what she is. When my brothers and sisters refused to have her live with them and she had nowhere to go, we took her in. Now when we need her, she refuses to help me out. I have three small children and am ex- pecting another. I haven't been able to find anyone to care for them while I'm in the hospital. My mother 'says she will not. "My husband's mother is not living, or I'd have nothing to TO111$ of Plum Pudding — A treat for travellers' on Canadian National Railways trains 'durirgg the Christmas and New Year holiday is being prepared (above) by Chef Romeo Charest. The plum pudding, made from a famous, century -old recipe. Was to be served In all CNIZ dining cars to top oft turkey dinners dressed With cranberry sauce and all the trimmings. Chef Chars t spent, more than a week lust preparing the Ire- inenclous quantities of plum pudding needed for the Yuletide,. Ner Fabrics BY lilDNA MILES Having the beds in her house look pretty, ruffly and immacu- late at all times with very little effort on her part is one dream of every homemaker. Until now it was possible to have beds that looked like plc - tures only by the dint of hard work, That's all been changed with the recent development of complete bedding sets in nylon, dacron and orlon, These are completely washable, need no ironing. They're soft, and in the case of comforters and blankets are light but possess warmth, Ruffled sheets and pillow cases are in angel crepe, a soft nylon fabric that resembles crepe de chine. Top sheet is, ruined on three sides and used with a fit- ted bottom sheet. A flower - sprigged comforter is completely machine washable. Its outer shell is sculptured nylon; it's filled with dacron, the filling also used for the pillow. Blanket is in a downy 'orlon fleece. All pieces in the set are color -fast, long -wearing, easily washed and quick to dry ed -Making Dividends Everything's VA'rV ,NO synthetic but the genuinely restful sleep. provided by the new, lightweight bedding, worry about; she was wonder- ful, so good to all her children and their families. What this world needs is more mothers- in-law like her. (I hope that "Mrs. L.", that daughter-in-law who wrote you, comes to her senses; she doesn't know how lucky she is! I'd give anything to be in her place). WORRIED SICK" * To be disillusioned in one's 0 own mother must be a sicken- " ing experience. It is unfor- • tunately true that the more * considerate one is of some * people, the more they take " advantage of it. * 1 hope that by now you have found some responsible ' * woman to care for your chi).- dren. If you haven't, 'won't * your sisters or your brothers' * wives help you out? * * * A spoiled husieseld is like a' spoiled child; he demands more and more, and gives less and less. Anne Hirst understands, and her sympathy and counsel will comfort you, Write her at Box 1, 123 Eighteenth St., New Toronto, Ont, .vaitovVo, ES n There was a time when shop- keepers in small towns looked favourably upon the increasing number of cars owned by farm, people. Cars brought the coun- try folk to town—away from the village 'Corner Store' where they had previously done most of their week -end shopping. Now it is cars, not the lack .of them, that keep people away from shopping at small town stores. Too many cars and not enough parking space. And it is certainly lack of places to . park that keeps visitors froin stopping to shop at these same small town stores. But if there is a shopping centre . . ah, . that solves the problem, for vis- itors and country folk alike. No parking problems there and practically everything you want within easy walking distance from your car. Now, this isn't a brief fox' community shopping centres— far from it. I am all for the small town stores who served the public long before shopping centres were even thought of, amemerely making a few ob- servations on things as I see them—particularly because of what .happened last week. I visited a. 'nearby town with a friend a few days ago. We drove through the Main street just about one o'clock—a good time for finding a place to park, 1 thought—and I looked forward. to visiting some of the stores where 1 might possibly do a little Christmas shopping. But oh dear, the street was so nar- row, straight parking on either side, and every parking space ' taken up. I had to double-park while Mrs. S . . went into the. post -office. 1 couldn't leave her because she isn't too good at walking. The stores looked quite attractive and there were several where I would like to have looked around, Mrs. 8 . , wanted groceries and meat, I specially wanted to pick up a few things at the Five and Ten Cent Store. So we had no choice but to go back to the outskirts ot town to the shop- ping centre that was opened about six months ago. Here we found plenty of parking space, lots of room in the stoma, and a splendid lunch counter where we' were able to get a good eup of tea to reinforce US for oar journey home, Now it must be admitted there is a certain amount of glamour in a shopping centre. Goods are set up by expert dis- play clerks, everything is clean and attractive, and somehow manages to convey the impres- sion that bargains galore are being offered to the public. That is often merely a delusion, It is my own opinion the average person can buy more economi- cally in his Own home town— once he has found a place to park! Take meat for instance: At the chain stores it, looks very attractive neatly rolled and packaged in cellophane. But your local butcher will throw in a bit of suet and a few bones— bones that make all the differ- ence to the flavour and richness of your gravy. Or perhaps it is oranges you are wanting. Big stores put them 'up in packages of half -a -dozen. They.look nice but you can't tell much about the quality until you get them home. At your local store or- anges are loose and you take your choice. And the price? At , the shopping centre where I went the other day grapefruit were 5 for 290. The day before I had bought better ones in our own town 5 for 250. There is also a sort of mass hysteria that seems to get hold of people at a shopping centre . more shoppers, everyone buying— won't be back for another week, better take advantage of this week's special. You don't real- ly peed it yet but the price might be up next time you come. And so it goes. You load up the car and start for home, away through the main street, past the smaller sstores where you used to shop. You remem- ber the friendliness of 'Mrs. Baker' and her staff. You re- call the many occasions on which the hardware store sent away a special order if what you needed was not in stock. And there was never any trou- ble in returning goods that were found unsuitable. But look at the cars . . : where would you ever park if you wanted to shop at the hardware today? Of course, the owners of those cars may all be shopping on the street. But are they? That's the question. Time was when the only competition small town merchants were up eigainst was in city stores and mail or- der houses. Now there are com- munity shopping centres and parking. problems. Obviously there is little that small town business can do— unless parking space were made available at the rear of the stores, where there is often a considerable amount, of waste space. Parking areas at either end of the Main street would help—if land were available. But that would be up to the town council. And don't think this is a• matter that does not concern eountry people. It concerns us very much indeed. Parking problems are common to us all --to those who buy and to those who sell. Unfortunately we are all inclined to take the line of least resistance, which, in this case, is the Community Shop- ping Centre. Mystery Of Serv.:nts Dublin. — This is vouched for as a true ghost story. A Mr and Mrs. Eden, from Salzburg, Aus- tria, recently. came to stay at a beautiful old castle on the outskirts of Dublin, The castle stands in the middle of a great cedar forest, and was built about the year 1200 by King John. It was recently used as a setting for a film 'about King Arthur and the Knights of the :Round Table. "It is crammed full of ghosts," 'people warned the newcomers. When Mr, and Mrs. Eden re- tired to their room, which had been King John's apartment, the husband almost immediate- ly fell asleep, but his wife lay reading for a while. All of a sudden, she noticed that the door handle was slowly being turned, and that the door was opening. Nothing happened, except .that a cold feeling ran down her spine, and she says she felt the hair stand straight up on her head. A few minutes later, the door slowly closed. She was so scared that her teeth were chattering. Suddenly, she heard a terrific" commotion in the room upstairs. That noise reassured her, and she went peacefully to sleep, thinking the noise was made by the servants, and -that she would be perfectly safe. At breakfast next morning, Mrs. Eden told her hostess what a fright "King John" had given her. She said she was glad that the servants' quarters were right above theirs, and how reassured she felt as soon as she heard them.“What do you mean, servants' quarters?” the hostess asked in dismay. "Why, .the rooms right above ours," was the answer. "There are no servants' quar- ters up there," the hostess said. "There's nothing." The mystery remains unex- plained. M dem Etiquette 4, What is the rule on the in- troduction of young and old persons? A. The younger person is al- ways introduced to the older or more distinguished, but a gen- tleman is always presented to a lady, even though he is an old gentleman of great distinction and the lady a mere slip of a girl, Of course, a woman is presented to the President of the United States, a royal per- sonage, or a dignitary of the church, Q. When attending °hutch services that are not familiar, should one copy the movement of members of the congregation, or just remain seated? A. It is better to try to do what the others are doing. You will be less conspicuous. Q. When Addressing an envel- ope to an unmarried girl or woman, is it all right to ad- dress it merely "Mary Wil - A. No; always use the prefix "Miss", no matter how ,young she is. Q, How can an unmarried woman, living in a hotel or boarding house, return hospi- tality shown her by married friends? A. One good way is to take them to dinner at a hotel or res- taurant. Q. Is there any way that one can possibly rinse one's fingers at the table if no finger bowl has been provided? A. It is permissable to tip the water glass against the corner of the napkin, and then wipe the fingers on this damp corner. Q. How far in advance should the invitation to a wedding be mailed? A. No earlier than t h r e e weeks or later than two weeks before the wedding. Q. I know that women are supposed to lead the way down the aisle of a theater, but if a man is host to a group of per - what does he do? A. In this case, he hands the checks to the usher and loll sws after him so that he may direct the sealing arrangement of his guests when they arrive at the proper row of seats. Q. When is the proper time for the guests at a church wed- ding to leave their seats after the ceremony? A. Not until the very end of the recessional. It is very bad form to break into the march to offer congratulations. Q. If olives and celery are to be served, when is the proper time to pass them around the table? A. During the soup course. .0.00AP,k00apm....vm.093.0spovxdo0,001.0.14,010100.000,00•10100.010,Aupts000AvvR,,, Arc 0 L WC5 It the 1-tattse' c t?' I 1 (ration an Iran Paid Ricker ra Seaf9 Alen who think 6 tino,-row practice 4trtoe4ratio today leet "t