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The Herald, 1907-07-19, Page 6WOULD RATHER STAY SINGLE. tndidate for Marriage Got Into the Wrong Place. .Fin athltio young man, who was on the way to get his marriage license, found himself at last in a room where; mists matter of fact, eiuididates for the *Wee 2e+ree werebeing examined. The mon exit he entered the room the surgeon said, "Strip!" "What's that?". said the astonished young fellow. "Get your clothes off," replied the sur- f n- r ^a'- ,s 33'0, did so, andhis chest measurement eras taken. Next the surgeon said, "Jump, over -+ibis horizontal bar." Re tried the leap, but fell to the ground. "Double up your kneee," commanded Um surgeon, "'and touch the boor with your hands." .again he tried and failed. "Now run around the room ten times." The young man rebelled. "That I'll not. 'd rather remain single." "Single?" eaid the doctor. "Fes, single. I'd like to know what all this has to do with getting my marriage license." And then his mistake as to the room las solved! 4.S I&ginard's Linilnent Cures Diphtheria. dam At the Dentist's. "Do you give gas here?" asked a wild - 'Soaking man, who rushed into a den - Vet's. "'iVe do," replied the dentist. 'Does it put a. fellow. to sleep?" "1 t does." "Sound asleep, so you can't wake him tep?" `You could break his jaw or black his 4570 and be wouldn't feel it?" "He would know nothing about it:" "How Iong does he sleep?" "The physical insensibility produced Pry inhaling the gas lasts a minute, or probably e. little less." "I expect that's long enough. Got it all ready for a fellow to take.'' "Yes. Take seat in this chair and •show zne your tooth," 'Tooth, nothing!" said the excited caller, beginning rapidly to remove his cleat and vest, "I want you to pull a pororse plaster off my back."—Tit-Bits. One packet has actuallyr killed a bustle! of files. — SOLD k3Y --.- f1fi1Jf1Cl8T8, CROCEt S .tPJe CENEB11E, STORES ItIa. per packet, or 0 packets for 25c. wits last a whole season. She "Raised" Hiim, A young man who bad not been mar- ried long, remarked at the dinner table the other day: "My dear, I wish you could make bread such as mother used to make." The bride smiled and answered in a yoke that did not tremble: "Well, dear, I wish you could make the dough that father used to make "-- Watehword (Dayton, 0,) Talks on.. ring ., )Li?il A Y of the Mails The be proof of the safety of sending money through the mails is the fact that the enormous exchanges between banks of different cities, amounting to millions of dollars every day, ere handled entirely through the mails. Banking by Mail is not a new- fangled, trained idea. 4% Compounded Q)uarter'ly It has been in successful operation for six years. The out-of-town people who transact their business through honking bi Mail are mini bored Isq thousands. They have proved it sample, safe and profitable. On all Savings Deposits we tallow four per cent. interest, compounded quarterly. Our booklet E scot free on re- quest, gives full information on Banking by Mail at 4 per cent, interest. Write for it to -day. The riNMON UST 7Car.amigy Ltndtba �zrr,IG ISVILG)ING. TORONTO Caretal and Reserve, $2.1300,000 Food Products Libby's Veal Loaf With Beef ' and Pork Do you like Veal Loaf? You will surely be delighted with Libby's kind, made from choice fresh treats, in Libby's spotless kitchens. It is pure, wholesome and delicious in Savor, garnished iv for sauce it isuan�appetiz g entree for luncheon or dinner, Ask your ttrocer for LIbblyor and tnuiet upon Qott4ua Ltbby'e, Libby, McNeill & Libby Ciriicncte • Regulating the Casting. German scientists have discovered in the cooling of cant iron that the inane - nese flows from the gray iron, and the ease -hardening can be definitely settled at a point in the refrigeration of the iron, The crystallization varies to such an extent that polished surfaces of the perpendicular side of the casting vary from the vertical side. By pouring the casting from one side the softest part of the casting can be regulated, as can the hardest. " Nurses' and o.4 r% Mothers' Treasure —safest regulator for baby. Prevents colic and vomiting—gives healthful rest --cures diarrhoea without the harmful effects of medicines containing opium or other injurious drugs. 42 Cures 25c.—at drug -stores. �+ National Drug & Chem.- Diarrj'1.s� oeaica1Co.,Limited Montreal. DEATH IN A NEW GUISE. Scheme That Landed Hungarian Judge in Town Jail. In a little village on the Hungarian frontier, not far from Pressburg, a pens- • ant woman recently received 400 kronen 1 (£17) from her husband in America. 1 She promptly deposited it in the focal branch of the Post Office Savings Blink, and then the next day went to wi hdraw the whole amount ,, rificial 'seas somewhat stt'rprised, an. ss ce. or an explanation, when site said that 'Death had appeared to her during the night and threatened to take her away with him unless she had. the 400 crowns ready for Ilim the next night,. The gendarmerie were communicated with, and when Death" made his prom- ised appearance he was found to be very much alive in the person of the Ioeal Judge. The woman's money, adds our Vienna correspondent who sends the story, is still in the bank, and the Judge is in jail. ---From the Pall Mall Gazette. Minard's Liniment Cures Distemper. PARADISE FISHES. Nine at the Aquarium From the Other Side of the World. Capt. Percy Watson, of the steamship Muneaster Castle, has presented to the Aquarium nine little paradise fishes, each about an inch and a half in length, which he brought with him on his last voyage from China and Japan to this port. They had been four months in the jar in which they were thus brought, over many seas, from half way around the world, but with proper care they were landed hero in good condition. The A uariuxn has recently received from lt. E. Van Keuren, of Honesdale, Pa, a pair of adult paradise fishes, the male of which, considerably the larger of the two, is about three and a half'inches long. The female of this pair has de- posited eggs since it was received here, and the male is now, after . the wanner of its kind, guarding the ,mest. The male paradise fish isnot only the larger but the more strikingly marked. It has a golden pellow band with, narrow pale blue bands. At the point of each gill cover is a bright green spotwith an orange line around the outer edge. Its fine are long and delicate and feathery and marked with the same coleys as. the body, while some of their spines:: project beyond the fins in slender ailantents of green or blue. A beautiful little fish is alt b' a w a t mo e c i the paradise fish. Chuialongkorn Having a Time. Her znajcsty Phre, Pare nindr Me Ohttlalongkorn, king of Siaxn; eenis to be somewhat human even if he is-wei ted down with a title ww.hieh, like iii o's bull's hide, is long enoughto ,encom ass his empire. Fox. a time he has disco ed most of the cares of the universeand is leading the simple life, trowelling ith tire most meagre retinue. He bees n1y about forty wives with frim. It mast t have been a delicate task to peek t he forty out of 4,000 better halves. If he king who is above all emperors, n- archs anti potentates were only a m re man, we ennact'er to ttiilnk of the re ep- tion he would get when he returns to Siam and faces the 3,980 odd disappo nt- ed ones.--i£anstes'Clty Journal, 41.- If41.- If4 . If sonic inert were paid .aeeording to their worth their pay days would be'f ew *ltd far between. ; 1 • " 1 , P1;,,AMIE SWEPT INDIA, .., Ia Ten Year There Have nee, 4,411,e s Deaths --Mortality Increasing , During the first three and a half months of 1007 the deaths from the plague in India totalled 494,000, the heaviest monthly mortality yet reported during the epidemic. According to the Indian World this would appear to show that the present year will exhibit a re- cord number of deaths. The plague records for the ten years Oetober, 1896, to December, 1900, show that there was a large annual increase from 1901 to 1904, the deaths numbering 274,00Q in 1901, 577,000 in 1962, 567,000 in 1903 and 1,022,000 in 1904, the worst year in ten years. There was a small decrease in 1905,16 the deaths falling to 951,000, and a large." decrease in 1906, when there were only 332,000, The total deaths for the whole ten years numbered 4,411,212. The im- provement wbioh was shown in the two years 1905 and 1906 has not, unfortu- nately, been ' maintained. From the first appearance . of the dis- ease up to the .year 1901 the .mortality ,,.r r 4 1, Fine muslins, dainty lin- gerie, iron' easier, look better, last longer if the, laundress nses the only cold -water (nc boiling) starch that really saves work and really won't stick. Try it. Get Give the Horse Warning. No movement should ever be required ',f the saddle -horse until he has been •.reviously warned, and, in however rua fashion, collected for the effort.' i not fair to him to neglect this, nor it to haul him backward by main trengtli, or to ask advance by suddenly 'ekin'g him in the ribs with the heels, r jerking;liis mouth with the bits, eus- ontary as are these performances; nor hould he be turned only by hauling pen ore rein until his body must fon ovnhis head and neck, or he must fall room --From "Directing the Saddle- orse," by F. M. Ware, in the Outing Sagazine for July. North Carolina. Fire Eater. Andy McGee, who carries the mail from Magnetic to liakersville, is a. men- stroeity. He can eat live coals of fire with impunity, and with a spoon. If you doubt this just bring him a live coal and a nickel and he will masticate the coal and pocket the nickel. This is not all, for he told us for one dollar he would pour a spoonful of molten lead in his mouth and let it cool and then take it out and give us a solid piece. What tan the devil do with such a man? --From the Bakersville Observer. Minard's Liniment Cures Garget in Cows. 4 When the President May Make an Arrest. Our diplomacy has always been mark- ed by a refreshing republican simplicity of speech. Tbo fifth ease is, of course, the recall of Senator Dupuy de Lome, just prior to the war with Spain, for having unwisely: criticised the adminis- tration in a letter to a friend, The recall of De Irujo, though, was marked by an unusual circumstance, At the request of the Spanish Government, actuated by a desire to avoid scandal, the State Department had arranged that. Irujo should depart quietly, as though his recall had not been demanded; but being a surly specimen of his race, he lingered on and on, becoming more and more a thorn in the side of the adminis- tration. To hints he was dumb, and when ordered away defiantly replied that he 'would suit his own pleasure in going; acourse of action which resulteli, in the enactment of a statute empower,, ing the President to arrest and aorta'• , out of the United States any envoy wo° remained after his recall and reasona ie notice to leave.—Prom "The Diplomat. at Washington," by Aubrey Lanston in the July Bohemian. poS .Abuses of .Wall Street, ;- William Edgard Gail, described as ass explorer and lecturer, told a church full of people in Detroit that there was "something to be Said for bararian can- ; nibalism in comparison with the carni-! balism of Wall Street." "There," said he, "men's soulsare swallowed at a sin- gle gulp." We hold • no brief for Wall street, but it, never seems to occur to many of those engaged hi denouncing it that there is no compulsion upon people who trade there. They are at pe.rfeet liberty to stay away. If they join the game, however, why should not they be bound by the outcome of it? Those who take risk must eertainly expect to pay for it if they lose, as they reeeive the rewards when they twin, --»Boston Herald. ♦ear The .a,'frieasr posseeitions of the French Ooverztmeztt amount to 3,805,060 square mime, and time of Great Britain 2,714,-, 000,' including Egypt. Cure Your Horse with luendall's Spavin Cure— he onercliablc cure for aIt Bone Diseases, Swellings and Lameness. FAIR C+nOIIND, Ont"I have used tKendalhsSpavinCure with great success, and think it an excellent remedy for Spavins, Sweeney, Sprains etc. WAr, Lamour., Accept no substitute. $x a bottle -6 for $5. write for free copy of our great book—"Treatise on the horse." 26 Dr. B. J. KEtIDiLL CO., Enisberg cabs, Ysrn ent, The Biggest Hedgehog, William Fanning shot yesterday after- oon the largest hedgehog ever heard f in this vicinity, Mr. Panning was fated on the veranda of his farm house lortly before dark when he saw an nimal that he took to be a small bear »ne out of the woods end amble to- ard the house. Securing his shotgun Cr. klannling whited for the anamal ,approach. When. it wasnear enough and bralce the animal's foreleg, d' not stop. Two more charges ere necessary to despatch the animal. It was weighed and tipped the beam a6 44ye pounds. Many have been visiting the farm o£ Mr. Fanning, where the dead lriedgehog has been on exhibition to -day. ---Brattleboro correspondence Springfield Union. osha.wa. Galvanized Steel Shi.ng1 s You cant afford to roof a thing without Oshawa Gal- vanized Steal Shingles. Good for a hundred years. Send for the free booklet. The PEDLAR People 173senti bll (30a Ohara ltontraal Ottawa Toronto Landon Winnipcy Revenge is Sweet. Waiter (aside)—The blase creature! Our mountains are Tot high enough for him, the lakes he tails cluck ponds, and he has not even a glance for the splendid view from the terrace. Now I will take rim the bill, that will stake him open his eyes!"---Meggendorfer Blaetter. ISSUE E 1N O, 29, 1907. a X70 YOU WANT D15LIV1nuEn ritkllll good FOR $145? Send for true illustrated catalogue, H. A. SINGNA.M, °rime Ont, COST OF LONDON FOG, Metropolitan Soot Makes the English- man hose Much. The annual cost of the pall of fog,, which overhangs London has been esti- mated to be $20,000,000, and this is said to Ibe entirely due to the presence of soot in the air. The annual loss from sooty chimneys alone hoe been figured up at $10,000,000. Theproblem of dfs-' pensing with this: great 'has been struggled with for a great many ' years and in all probability the famous London .fog will be conquered in the' near future, The latest scheme in this direction is a coal substitute which lis ' being introduced with some success in the English metropolis. It le not, strict- ly speaking a substitute, for it is a 1 preparation of coal itself which is strict- ed in suoh a manner that the impurities I are entirely removed so that combustion in the furnace or stove is aceompliehed without giving off soot or smoke. OA* ENGLISH SPAVIN LINIMENT Removes all hard, soft or calloused lumps end blemishes from horses, blood spavin, curbs, splints, ringbone, sweeney, stifles, sprains, sore and swollen throat, coughs, e£e. Save $50 by use of one bottle. War- ranted the most wonderful Blemish Cure ever known. Sold by druggists. Aeronauts in the Sea, It is not a little remarkable that although scores of balloons have been driven out to sea, oases in which this misadventure has ended fatally are few. More than a century ago, when Major Money made an ascent from Norwich, he was compelled to descend in the seem, vrhere he remained for seven hours until hie plight ' was seen and he was rescued by the cre-Y of a revenue cutter. Some years later, 1n 18.12, James Sadler, narrowly weaned drowning to an atteanpt to cross the Irish Channel; his balloon dropped into ,the Water some stiles off Liverpool and he was on the point of succumbing when rescue came in the norm of a Dishing boat. In a similar attempt a isZr. Crosbie was saved when ,almost in extremis many miles from the English coast. Lunar 1, in 1185, nearly lost hie life in the sea off Edinburgh, and in the came year 'two aeronauts, in an a2- teaIpt to cross the English Channel, had adao a narrow escape.—Prom the Westminster Gazette. Re,i,, Etching Shite, Continuous itching with Eczema, Salt Rheum, Tetter and constantly scratching until the skin fie raw and bleeding? Nothing gives relief ? You're wrong. Just try j'• f AAOE MARii. •ReCicrreEo. 0, such relief, as this wonderful Ointment its applied I Itching stops—ted. angtyplaces heel -- end in a short time you will sot have a sign of skis disease. 50e. boa --6 for $2.50—Tran! size 25c. At druglsto or The Chemists' Co. of Canada, Limited, Hjatnilton—Toronto. to Pier Master's Voice. Elevator Boy Elevator going up. Deaf Old Lady Which way is it go- ing, bub? !levator Boy (iznpatiently)TJp1 Up! 1 Up! "Deafr Old Lady (indignantly) You talk to me, bub, as if you thought 1 vias a trained dog!--Lippincott'e Magazine. tYe Minard's Liniment Cures Colds, etc. Inexplicable. Hotel Proprietor ---Has not the man in nhmber fifteen received ,bis bill yet? Head Waiter Certainly! Fifteen min utes ago. "Strange! I hear him singing in his room!" Meggendorfer Blaetter. ASK YOU ► " DEALERFO Ductless and Priscilla Pina.liosfery For Ladles Rock Rib and Hercules School Hoot Strong as Gibraltar limit of SMtngtk Princess F.eypt3an IAlla For Children's Fine Dress Little Darling and Little Pet For Infants Lambs' Wool and SS11k 'Kips All Wool Fins Hosiery Manufargtured far the Wholesale Trade by the CHIPMAN-IHOLTON KNITTING CO., LIMITED, HAMILTON, ONTARIO. ilE \., In three and sir -foot rolls, is unexcelled for all building and lining pup - paces, inside vans of summer houses, refrigerator plants, etc. GET OUR PRICES. 1 else aanse The E. Be EDDY G1t„ Limited HULL - • CANADA Mast 1tr all principal efi.a, --4,-r***,,, trot/040w