The Seaforth News, 1959-11-05, Page 6`‘What , happens afterward?"
When a man has confessed in-
fidelity and his wife says she
has forgiven him, what is their
life from then on? I am sure
My interested readers wonder,
as Ido . One wife writes
that she is trying hard to be-
lieve her husband is loyal °now,
but s h e seems to be failing.
Neither is happy in their pre-
sent, existence.
"In spite of all his a.surances,
and all my knowledge of his.
r e a 1 goodness," she writes,
"every time my husband goes
on a. trip my doubts throw me
.into cold sweats until his re-
turn. If he is being true, I atn
being unjust, If he isn't, I re-
mind myself I'll know it soon
e n o u g h, But it doesn't often;
work.
"He does his utmost to help
me trust him, but 1 swing hot
and cold, and chiefly because
this attitude is affecting our
children. They are old enough
to have witnessed our conflicts,
and we want to dispel their
anxiety, What can we do to
maintain r dignified family 1iIe
together when our own nerves
are worn raw?
"For years we have both read
your column, and marveled how
people can expose their private
differeuces when the solution
seems so obvious? But we found
that when your own emotions
Fashion Page Feash
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4874
SIZES
10-18
1
I.
•
141.
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Send order to ANNE ADAMS,
Box 1, 123 Eighteenth St., New
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are involved You lose all rea-
soning sense. You have an ex-
traordinary understandingof.
other people's weaknesses, Anne
Hirst, and we ask you to help
us stay strong now and give
ourchildren the emotional se-
curity. they. deserve." '
' * *
* When this husband confess-
`* ed his sin, he told his wife
* he had had no idea how it
* had affected her and the •
childrei't. She admits that
' that hour was "terrific" for
* her,, too, ' and the two' had
* never beeir so .close" before,
* That night she believed in
* him implicitly.
* Why doesn't she believe in
* him since?,
* The man who has once be-
* trayed his wife is not likely
• **to risk it again. For the few
• husbands who repeat, thou-
* sands- of others are so shock-
* ed by their wrongdoing, so
* grateful for being forgiven;
* they Would never think of
* committing a second offense.
* From this wife's letter, I.
* gather her husband 'feels that
* way now. His one ambition
e is iter' own, to create a care-
* free life for the children, How
* can he succeed when every
* time he comes home she in-
*. sults' him with . questions?. If
* he were guilt y, he would
* laugh off her doubts and
* eh, e e the subject, This one
* does 'tis best to reassure her,
+ but the effort leaves him
* weak and hopeless.. If he were
* not being faithful, would he
* still be so concerned, for their
• children?
• His wife must turn over to-
* day's leaf. Trust her husband
* with . all her heart, and never
*t
again force - him to :reiterate.
* his loyalty. Reducing a man
* to stuttering denials is de-
* meaning to them both. Only
* when he feels her faith in
* him is sure, can they create
* together the atmosphere
* where their .children can re-
* lax and expand in a new hap-.
* piness.
* TO "GISELLA": Tell your
* husband, once and for all, that:
* you are convinced' he is keep-.
* ing his promise.. Declare you
* will never question him again'
* —and mean it,• Only the will
* he be able to look forward '
* to a home life rich in 'peace,
* and faith. — And if he can't'
* be sure of that, why should '
* he come home at all? '
• Your letter is an objective
* analysis of yoursituation, give
* ing a satisfactory background,
* including, a ruthless deserip-
* tion of your repeated doubts.
* It was a help to me in answer-
* ing you, and I wish you. had
• let me print all of it. Thank
* you for your confidence.
* * *
When problems assail us, rea• '
s on expires a 1l d confusion.
reigns. This is the time to con-
fide in an understanding 'friend
whose wisdom and sympathy
are yours for the askm„ Write
Anne Ilirst, Box 1,• 133 Eigh-
teenth. St., New Toronto, Ont:
Q. Is it always necessary tn.
say, "You're welcome,' in re-
sponse to "Thank you?"
A. Some response should be
made, and "You're welcome."
or "That's quite all right," are
always good.
Q. If one is in doubt as; to
whether an invitation oak be
accepted, how should the' ac-
knowledgement be worded?
A. There should 'oe no uncer-
tainty about the acknowledge-
ment. You MUST state defin-
itely whether or not you can
accept the invitation.
a
(FIRING PRACTICE — Indonesian President Sukarno practices
t4Srina a .45 caliber pistol ala range in Jacarta,
FINAL APPEARANCE = the coffin containing the body of tenor Mario Lanza stands at right
during funeral services in the Church of the Immaculate Heart of Mary, Rome, Italy; The
singer's wife and children are 'in the front pew, left.
itlRONICL1 S
// iINGERF P
'l' c 1eI%4olSru. O Cia,eila
•
Fall` Fair time' again and ideal
weather for; such"'occasions. Last
Saturday we went, to ,the Halton
County Fair at Milton, .1 don't
know-how many' passed' through, •
the gate but it must certainly
have been a record crowd. And
so, many changes since. we were
there two years ago. Correction.
— since I. was there. Partner
went last year but it rained and.
rather made a mess of things.
.This year we found a new grand-
stand with plenty of room under
the grandstand' for exhibits and.
a tea room. 'It'was a tremendous
improvement on the old set-up.
Of course, there were trotting
races. More than that there was
a bookie, something new -for Mil-
ton. 'He attracted quite as lot of
attention. I stood' close 3' and
watched for a while.as two dol-
lar bilis changed hands as' -bets ,
were taken for.. the various •
horses. Then I looked as ehe..next
race was run but found. more in"
terest in watching: the faces of
the betters than the progeess::,of
• the race. Net all could win and
.it was easy to pick out the losers. '
The show of horses and live-
stock was wonderful; arse the
work and exhibits .of the Junior-
Farmers' and the: 4-1:1. Clubs. The
women's section showed a tempt-
ing array of baking, pickles, pre-
serves and handicraft: The vari-
ous W.I. branches had a won-
derful exhibit — as' they' always.
do. This year it was articles suit-
able for homemade Yuletide gifts
and decorations. A ;photographic
display was a new feature: so
also were the enlarged pictures
of the Twelve and Sixteen, Mile'
Creels; Conservation Authority.
But of course the most enjoy-
able feature of the hair was'
meeting the people. For this . rea-,
son. I much prefer local fall fairs
to the •C.N.E. The have 0
warmth and personality that the
Big Fair cannot match.,
' One of thecompensations, of'
getting older is watching the
young Poll; grow up; end 'no-
where isat. so striking as at a
loca]'fair..At,Milton, for instance„
boys 'and girls ',who went to-.
school With' and .Bob, were
there' with school-age children of'.
their own, sometimes accompa-
nied by young looking grand-
parents, wire, in our day and age,
were busy raising a family of -
their. own. And there were some
even • older — . in some cases
great-grandparents. Not quite -so
nimble on .their. feet as they lased
to be, nor as quick to recognize
people, but still active and inter-.
ested in all that was going on.
ground them. In fact we noticed
quite a number of aging •people;
who looked little different from
what they did ten years ago —
some even appeared younger!
Nowadays most of our aged,.
have a contented, unworried
look. I wonder how much the
Old Age Pension has contributed
to their sense of 'independence
and peace of mind.
We found it particularly' pleas-
ing 'to. go back to our old farm-
ing community and meet so'
many of our former neighbours
and friends, obviously making
the most of their new-found leis-
ure after long years of hard
work, .covering periods of de-
pression, war and inflation, See-
ing them made us 'feel that On-
tario; in spite. -of many obvious
shortcomings, Is still a pretty
'good place in which to live.
We hope Mr. Khrushchev has
gone back to Russia with that
same impression of the United
States. I think his visit had
everyone a little on edge, I, for
one, was terrified in case some-
thing aright happen to him while
he was guest of the U.S.A. That
would have been ghastly. What
happens after he sets, foot again
in his own country is not our
worry. But won't it be interest-
ing to hear what he has to tell
his own' people about what he
saw and heard in the U.S.? No
one can deny he has a remark-
able personality and a pleasing
sense of humour, even if .it is a
little crude at times, As for in-
stance, his comments on the
"Can -Can" dance. On the other
band his remarks were no more
crude than the dance itself. In
fact, maybe he and his wife, in
some of their comments, may
have helped us to see ourselves
as others see us;
Isn't this a marvellous fall —
and don't you love the •cool
nights and warns days? I wish it
could go on for weeks and weeks.
We are still getting plenty of
mushrooms, enough to keep our
family and friends supplied. No
casualties so far but without the
greatest care I feel there could
be. 1 found two patches of a sus-
picious looking growth, just like
mushrooms except for being.
white where the true mushroom
is pink. It could be they are just
ariother specie but we don't take
any chances. Yesterday a neigh-
bour brought us in a nice pick-
ing of fresh, .green watercress,
. gathered from the Forks of the
Credit. It .took ree back in me-
- mory to Dorking,- in Surrey,
where we spent, our honeymoon.
At a nearby vilIage an 'enterpris-
ing farmer grew,watercress.on a
commercial basis. Quite an idea, .,
wasn't, it? '
Praae Pair
953
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Magnificent in colour! Create
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'Pattern 958: transfer of two
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NUMBER, your NA1IIE and AD-
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-- Send for a copy of 1959 Laura
Wheeler. Needlecraft Book. It'
has lovely designs to order: em-
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weaving, quilting, toys. In the
book, a special surprise to make
a little girl happy — a 'cut-out
doll, clothesto colour. Send 25
cents for this book.
Q. When a bride has received
a gift from her former office
force, consisting of perhaps a
dozen employees, bow 'should
she acknowledge It?
A. She may write a personal
note of thanks to the chief clerk
or offipe manager, or to the
person she knows was in charge
of the contributions towards the
gift, asking this person to thank
the others.
Royal Rabies
Cause Sensations
Whenever the happy anticipa.
tion of a new royal baby is an-
nounced, a series of totally false
impressions sweep the world,
Most mistaken of allare the ex-
pectant mothers who imagine
that .if' their child is born at the
same moment as the Queen's
new baby next year. they will
qualify for the Queen's Bounty.
When Prince Charles was born,
scores of new birth certificates-
flooded the Palace post office
from mothers anxious to show
that, their child had arrived on
the same day as the Prince and
might rate for a prize.
Some of the certificates came,
registered, from as far away as
Australia and California and
they 111 had to be re+urned.'
A German woman suggested
that her new baby could be giv-
en the same names as Prince
Charles and theo
tw babies. b es she
thought. might be photographed'
together to restore the friend-
ship of the two nations.
When Queen Victoria's first
child was born. 119 years ago, a
handsome sum from the royal
coffers was allocated to charity
and Queen's Bounty suppers for
the : poor• were held throughout
Britain. No -other payments have
ever•clebbrated a royal birth and
evesr-tl*S•that the Queen Used
to tse parents Of triplets' has
b e e n ;_cancelled i n: National
HeaIth_Britain.`
The officer -in -charge of the
guard at St. James's Palace used
'to receive automatic promotion
on the birth of a royal baby.
When the infant King Edward
VI; arrived, however. the guard
was being -changed.
A heated argument arose. for
the officer of the old guard
claimed promotion on the ground.
that his guard .had not been
changed. The new officer sturd-
ily claimed promotion because
he had in fact taken over the.
Palace keys and thus. technical-
ly, the guardianship of St.
.James's.
The question had to lie settled
•by , the commander-in-chief of
the Army. It could not be proved
that the keys had: actually been
handed over before the birth,
and so the officer of the old
guard got promotion: -
Nowadays, of course, old tsar!-
, itfons are easily overlooked. ' On
hearing • unofficially of the .birth
of Prince Charles; the then Lord :.
Mayor of London donned his
regalia in order that he could
announce the -birth formally in
accordance with ancient custom.
When an hour passed, and no
word came. it is said he tele-
phoned the Palace. In reality
three hours passed before a mes-
senger on a motor -bike drove up
with the official announcement.
By then it was well after mid-
night and the Lord Mayor con-
tented himself • by posting the.
announcement on thedoor of the
Mansion Hpuse, ,his official home.
In former days,` of ,course, it,. ,
was customary for •.ministers of
the Crown' and the Archbishop
of Canterbury to assemble in the
royal bedchamber, This was to
lessen the risk, that a changel-
ing might be smuggled in and
usurp the sueeession to 'the
Throne;
Queen Maree wife of James II,
was watched by sixty-seven
people, crowding as close as
they could to the foot of the bed.
Even so, it was long alleged that
the baby died the following day
and that a substitution occurred.
Queen Anne kept ° her. prying
ministers busy, for she had no
fewer than seventeen babies,
none of whom survived in in-
fancy, Queen Charlotte, wife of
George III, caused her first baby
to be shown to the public. The
cradle" of . the two-week.ol'd
prince was fenced off from the
constant queue of visitors; but
this royal sideshow was never
repeated.
Queen Victoria's first baby
was a girl andshe heard one of
the waiting ministers, exclaim
with disappointment, "Oh, it's a
princessk'
"Never mind," a 'voice came
from the bed. "It will be a prince
next time!"
When the next time came
Prince Albert objected to the
presence of the dignitaries and
got over the difficulty neatly ,
merely by summoning 'them too
late. Subsequently, only the
Home Secretary sups required to
be in 'attendance at a birth.
In modern . times the practice
was discontinued after the birth
of Princess. Margaret. The Home
Secretary of the day, J. R.
Clynes; went to, Glamia for the
baby's expectedarrival but, ow-
ing to a miscalculation, he was
kept walting a month!
Later, King George VI consult-
ed his solicitors and found that
this ritual attendance was not a
legal requirement- During the '
war three royal births in the
Gloucester and Kent families
took place without the presence
of any minister of the Crown
and finally the archaic custom
was abolished.
Legally the doctors are not
required to give any details of
the progress of mother and child
in the bulletins and the formal
announcement will have to be
carefully worded. Queen Vic-•
toria read a bulletin prepared
after one 'of .hes confinements
and burst into laughter' at the
phraase,'"The QueenandPrince
are perfectly well"
"People will think that both
toryinssband, •Prinee Attest, and E
have been confined`,: she, pro-
tested, The phrase was -hurried'-
/y
hurried=Py altered to read: "The • Queer*
and infant Prince are perfectly
well."
At one time 'royal deetoaes
never sent in a bill but now the
Queen's Treasureralways asks
for an account to be rendered.
An exception is -made for the
specialists officially appointed •to
the Queen's medical household
and they receive National Health
rates for all Palace patients!
Happily, there are ati11 suffi-
cient royal rituals to greet the
Queen's new baby with all the
pomp and pageantry that the
peoples of the Commonwealth
desire. Whether a prince or prim -
cess, the tiny newcomer will be
greeted by a salute of twenty-
one guns at eighteen official
saluting stations at home and ,
overseas.
And for good measure batter-
iee at. the Tower of London and
in Hyde Park will give an extra
twenty rounds "for -the people."
The gay citizens of London
used to rush into the streets to
fire their own ''guns whenever
a .Tower salute was heard. To
make the city a little safer, the
Army undertook to fire guns for
them and the habit is maintain-
• edto this day.
The King's Troop of the Royal
Horse Artillery draw their guns -
to Hyde Paric. It's one of the
few occasions when the either -
ate central gate of Ferbte Arch
is opened ignoring the rules of
a'modern traffic roundabout•—to
admit them into the -park.
ISSUE 44 — 1959
"SE.Z WHO?"—"Boyson," a Siamese eat passenger -beard
the_ liner Constitution, couldn't care less about sleos as R
wanders into the ship's dog area, .
Ad-