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The Goderich Signal-Star, 1986-04-02, Page 17rr Entertainment • Futures • Religion * Family 9 More . SE TION Pre -natal class for single wo aims to stop cycle of poverty BY SUSAN HUNDERTMARK When 18 -year-old Jennifer (a pseudonym) found out she was pregnant a year and a half ago, she felt scared and alone but she was also happy. "I wasn't upset about it. I think I plann- ed to get pregnant," she says. Now, she and her eight -month-old daughter live in their own apartment on mother's allowance. She looks after her daughter'and studies from correspondence courses during her daughter's daily nap and in the evening after she puts her to bed. "I thought it would be all fun and joy and it's really hard work but I love every minute of it,'." she says. When Jennifer got pregnant, she was 17; had been going out with her daughter's father for five years and had dropped out of Grade 9 at 16. She thought she would get married but her boyfriend changed after the pregnancy. "He started to hit me," she says. But, support from her mother and father has helped her through some rough times. "My family has been with me all the way. When I first knew I was pregnant I told my Mom and I don't Wink a lot of girls can do that. And, I thought my Dad would hate me but he gave me his blessing," she says. Though she's living -on her own, she. knows her parents are there to help when she needs them. "If my parents weren't behind me, I think my daughter would be in a foster home by now. I don't think I would have made it," she says. imammiPOSTSCRIPT By Susan Hundertmark A story of the `hives and the hive®nots' Going to be tough Jennifer admits she never really thought - - about what she wanted to do with her life before she had her baby and she realizes it's going to be tough to get an education now. But, she's determined to finish her Grade 12 at least. , "I'd like to get a good job as a secretary or a social worker to support us and I'd like to getmarried, have more kids and have my daughter grow up in a happy home. I also want to stay close to my parents," she says. Having a baby has cut back on Jen- nifer's social, life considerably. Because she's trying to pay off the bills for her fur- niture and because baby diapers and for- mula are costly on her budget, she can on ly, afford to spend$5 on.a movie once every 4hree or four months. "I'm losing out on friends and going out to shows and dances. My teenhood was all gone when I had the baby. All the money ----go-este-the-baby-and-food.' i -` Jennifer worries abopt her 15 -year-old sister who's just starting to become sex- ually active. "I'd like to see my sister finish high school, even go to college and achieve some goal she wants to do." "I hope she at least nabs birth control. It's her choice if she wants to get pregnant but. she should at least think it through. Once you have a baby, you can't change it," she says. Jennifer says a little more education about birth control in the schools would be helpful, especially for boys. "I don't think guys get involved. They get girls pregnant and they leave. I don't think girls should have all the worries with using the pill. Guys should participate more," she says. Though Jennifer's boyfriend accom- panied her to local pre -natal classes in the beginning, he soon stopped going and Jen- nifer felt scared and alone at 17 in a room full of married couples. She says a new pre -natal program which began in Goderich this month for single mothers would have been helpful for her. "It would be less scary if y.oi>re just with other women," she says. The program, which began Mar. 4 by the Huron County Health Unit, has one woman and bei boyfriend enrolled. Another course could be offered this summer and if the response is good, the program could be offered county -wide. Pre -natal class Public health nurse Madeleine Roske designed the program which is. directed at a group of women who may be at greater risk for complications during pregnancy and childbirth because of phy iollogical im- maturity, poor nutritional habits and a reluctance to obtain early pre -natal care. It's something I've had on my mind, for a long time but we didn't have the man- power available before," she says. d+^ The program should help young women prepare physically, emotionally and men- talfy for childbirth. It includes topics such , as fitness and relaxation, anatomy and physiology, physical and emotional changes, nutrition, fetal development, breastfeeding, labor and delivery, infant feeding and care, parenting and sexuality, and contraception. Several social . agencies as well as local doctors will participate in the program. A • social worker from Family and Children's Services will' talk to pparticipants about social problems and alternatives'available to them such as adoption. A representative from Comrnunity and Social Services will discuss finances in - eluding how to get mother''s allowance. Labor,. and delivery will be explained by local doctors and contraception, and sex- tiality will be discussed by Itiith. Linton rom the Health`ITnit. "Knowledge reduces anxiety' during l bor. If you're not worrying, your overall alth benefits. And irk blot l wfio a over fH� 1 eats well and gets good. prenat {.r'�lf44t.J.:%,.,/',':.iff.<3:.::+:i9i.:;zTT.:,(,:••,>. the chances of having a healthy baby are good," says Roske. The program was not organized in response to, the pregnancy ratein adolescents. In Ontario, that rate has drop- ped from 5,282 in 1982 to 4,911 in 1984. And, in Huron County, the adolescent pregnan- cy rate was the lowest in Southwestern On- tario in 1981'at 36 pregnancies compared to the provincial Mean rate of 46. Though the statistics indicate some pro-• gress is being made in prevention with birth control education, a program for young, 'single, mothers will probably always be needed, says Roske. That's because it's aimed at girls who have chosen not to terminate their pregnancies and who may have wanted to get pregnant in the first place. , • "We want to help them have a healthy pregnancy and a healthy baby and help. them to become good parents and produc- tive people. The goal is high because we've got to aim high," she say& • By giving young, single mothers support during a potentially difficult time, Roske says she hopes to help break the cycle of poverty. Leads to poverty A study done by Planned Parenthood of Ontario by Maureen Jessop Orton and Ellen Rosenblatt published in February, 1986 saysthat teen pregnancy leads in litany cases to poverty among women and their children because it interrupts- the education of the mother and therefore, limits her participation in the 'labor force and in political life. , "Today, adolescent pregnancy is a symptom of social inequities, compounded : by'both gender and, class -the lower status of :wemen relative to men, and the ine- citable distribution e ,, q bution of essential life resources amongst families,' says the study. To complete that circle, adoleseetit pregnancy and adolescent parenting serve post-industrial socieLyneeds well educated people with more mature parenting skills and more sophisticated employment skills." "Adolescent parenting short-circuits 'that crucial process of life preparation and breeds poverty, ..especially amongst women (married or single) and their children." Rates decline . �, The study also says that the dropping teen pregnancy statistics indicate that "where the choice to avoid . pregnancy or parenthood is available, adolescent pregnancy rates do decline. Blaming teens' inadequacy or immorality is generally agreed to be `blaming the vic- tim."' As well as pre -natal ,classes, Roske says she hopes to follow up with . parenting classes to teach the mothers about normal development of their babies and with en- couragement for the Women to continue school. "I'd like to see ongoing classes so down the road, the mother can go from a preg- nant teen toa young woman ,with good parenting skills, good self-esteem and a good handle on her own life and goals." "I've seen girls with. the odds against them. Who havedeveloped into good mothers and have gone on to community college and good jobs. But, they need sup- port to get there," she says. "An un .anted pregnancy does not Mean the end of the road with the proper sup- port." 'IThee feminization of -poverty real, says . Marilyn, Huhner, supervisor of the Huron- Perth offices of Conimunity and Social Services;. • In Huron County, there are 200, Single parent families, 90 per dent of which are ntother led. About .25.,per ,cent of those mothers are teenagerS, •, :, " en you're 16 dr' 17, its depressing to loalx:forwerd to a life' on family benefits. al• cage, Its hay enough , for. a teenager who -to perpetuate theSe'social inequities; Our I'd love to tell you how much I enjoyed the record high temperatures over the weekend. I'd love to talk of bike riding, baseball playing, sitting in the sun and feeling the warm spring (almost . sum- mer) breeze on my face. But, I can't. Because, while the tulips and crocuses were busting forth from the warm soil, red, itchy blotches were busting out all over *best friend's skin. And, while the Easter bunny was passing out chocolate eggs, lumps the size of eggs. were swelling up all over his body. Yes, while most of southwestern On- tario was enjoying a honey of a spring' weekend, my friend was suffering from hives. And, I mean hives in the plural form, At his worst, he looked as if he'd been attacked by the occupants of not just one but several bee hives. He lookedas if he'd been held captive in a gigantic bee hive while sadistic, terrorist bees took turns torturing him. He looked like the stunt man after the filming of the "Killer Bees" horror movie. Yup, he looked (and .assured, me he felt) terrible. When his body first reacted to whatever allergy caused the hives (we still haven't figured that out but have several theories), we were both quite frightened: • The three bumps we'd guessed to be mosquito bites spread across his body swelling painfully in a matter of hours. Because neither of us had ever ex- perienced this sort of thing before, we 'were soon sitting in an emergency room at a nearby hospital. We were calmed by the doctor's casual diagnosis of hives but were unprepared for the amount of discomfort to follow for several days. And, as self-appointed nurse, I was unprepared for caring for someone with anything more serious than the sniffles. Aside from the rare cold and a bout 'with ti oiloniielhosis iti :high -scheer I've beeir pretty healthy all my life so far (knock on wood). Though good health is glorious, it does little to prepare you for two things—being sick yourself and look- ing after someone who's sick, My weekend gave me immense respect for both health care <professienals and parents of sick children. First.of all, I'm a worrier: When an ar- my of ugly, red bumps has invaded and conquered the body of a loved one, I find it difficult to hidethe panic I feel welling up inside me: And, in this state of mind, it's hard to be reassuring to calm the of flicted person who's quite certain he'll have baseball gloves for hands for the rest of his life. • And, I empathize too much. Every itch, every pain, every ache felt by "the pa- tient" isfelt by me too (or at least I im- agine magine it to be that way). I fuss around repeating my • question, "How are you feeling now?" as if it were a magic sl promoting wellness. But, because I can't do anything to stop. the discomfort, I feel inadequate and frustrated. And, because I'm impatient, I fan- tasize about possessing the mystical power to heal if only so we can both go outside and enjoy the sunshine. As a member of the "instant gratification" generation, I find it difficult to wait for time to do its stuff and improve my pa- tient's health: But, I tried. I put on my best Florence Nightingale look of compassion and drove to the pharmacy for the prescrip- tion, cooked chicken noodle soup till I started to grow feathers, made tea and served it at all hours, cleaned up his ' apartment (well, parts of it) until it shone, ran numerous soothing baths and applied ,calamine lotion until I wore almost as much of it as the patient. Nurturing someone through a sickness is almost as exhausting as being sick yourself. And, while the patient is still sick and cranky, it's a thankless job. But, I' got my revenge occasiohally. While my friend was soaking in the tub, I was reminded of a much younger friend whose chickenpox put her in the bathtub just as frequently: I threatened to get her on the phone so she could return the good= natured teasing she received from him four months ago. I was sure she'd 'find great.pleasure now in asking him for a magic marker to play '`connect -the - dots'.' on his blotchy skin. He, of course, was not amused. Hives, it seems, even swell up your fun- ny bone so the amusement can't escape. But, I 'guess it's hard to laugh when you're trying to suppress the urge to scratch. .Overall, the weekend gave me a greater appreciation for my good, ap- parently allergy -free, health. It also rein- forced my belief that each' relationship contains as much give as it does take, as much work as it does pleasure. And, it's given me an appreciation and awe for parents who've taken the responsibility of Caring for, their children no matter What the state of their health. But, let' me warn you of one thing. see My friend around town, vlili�r, ybn dote t tciateit. eli� he looks swell. " He won't pp�re graduates from highschool to go to a first job. But, when you'rea single mother on mother's allowance, you have no where to go but up," she says. Though it's not impossible, a person cer- tainly has to be determined to get off fami- ly benefits, says Hohner: A single motherwith one child is given $558 to live on as well as a shelter subsidy of $155 if shelter costs are unreasonable. Other benefits include OHIP coverage, a drug card, a dental card, a winter clothing allowance of $80 a child in October and a back -to -school clothing allowance in August. If a mother gets a job, she's allowedto earn $140 a month before anything is taken from her allowance. If her income is below a certain level,. there is a phase-out allowance for a month when a mother goes into fulltime employment. "It's not an easy life. You: have to be ,a good budgeter tobe able to copC: Our clients should be given a lot of credit," she' says. . Little incentive is given to those on mother's allowance to go back to work because it usually costs more to pay for childcare‘than'a woman can earn to make it worthwhile. The exception is for women who live near daycare'centres` in' Vanastra and Goderich whose'costs are subsidized. The allowance covers food, clothing and shelter only. There is not enough' for car payments, gas, or telephone. Because of the financial: constraints, Rohner says young mothers on mother's allowance often have problems with their emotional and social needs.. "There is not enough to go around for a babysitter, a dinner out or a movie. It must • be awfully hard for a,1G yar-old mother to see her friends going out.". , , To prepare a pregnant adolescent fer th future, Kim Williinott,. social worker' with Family and Children's Services talks to program partici anis about options, life as a single mom 11,S• a' She dese�ibes 1 g bA. Turir to: POO-.