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Clinton News-Record, 1984-09-19, Page 2;1";•, , • " Nr.148,04Y,.,sg • I • •Iz ,4777/fir • C.‘ Huron Centre for 'Children and Youth staff members held a day long workshop with, Dr. Howard Irving last week. Dr. Irving is au expert hi divorce mediation counselling. Taking part in the seminar were (left to right) Huron Centre Director Don Keillor, .Laurie Thomson, Dr. \Irving, Sandy Stuart, Doug Reberg, Janie Gattinger, Nancy McLeod and Shirley Hackman (in front). Huron Centre counsellors have been working with divorce mediation ser- vices for the past year. (Shelley McPhee photo) • Huron Centre offers mediation program Seryices like the Huron Centre for. Children and Youth may obtain more assistance with mediation programs through a new government funded program. Family Mediation Canada is a new organization that will promote and develop divorce counselling Pr9grams. Headed by University of Toronto_ professor, Dr. Howard Irving, the service islbeing funded by with a sizable federal government grant. At the annual meeting of the Huron Cen- tre, Dr. Irving explained that Family Mediation Canada will develop training courses and promote and study programs, like the one at the Huron Centre for Children and Youth. Family Mediation Canada will develop • standards and ethics for mediation service's and will monitor the practice. While mediation is a relatively new con- cept in Canada, Dr. Irving explained that in Europe and the United States, the out,of- court settlement procesg has been very suc- cessful. Laws in California state that mediation is mandatory. Divorce cases are not allowed into the court room unless the couple ,has previously had mediationcounselling. In that state, the serviceis financed through the tax system. Anyone who .files for divorce in California is taxed $10 for each filing. This money is earmarked for mediatiOn program funding. In Canada, through Dr. Irving's work, mediation is becoming a recognized alter- native to divorce court. In Toronto the Legal Aid agency is cur-, rently studying mediation. A comparative study between the court system and media- tion settlement will analyse cost differences and final results between the two systems. Acc?rding to Dr. Irving, mediation means less psychological stress on children, it creates lasting settlements, and costs less. A 1983 study in the United States showed that if litigation cases used the mediation alternative, $9 -million in court fees alone could have been saved. Dr. Irving met with staff from the Huron Centre for a day -long seminar on September 20. For the Huron Centre counsellors, the workshop offered additional instruction and re-inforcement Of pilot project. For Huron County couples, the, mediation counselling offered at the Huron Centre for Children and Youth, provides an alter- native. It allows divorcing couples the op- tion of solving issues relating to the future of their children without court room hostilities. „ tional. .War zone. The happy..frni1y was , divided and the childreni*OilellWOIVetkni a painful situation that they. acOulditet understand.' When couples separate and divorce, their children ofteAsufferthemost. They become On4jeglit 'victims in their parents' arguments andtustotly battles. Childrenwhe have watched their parents' split up often feel rejected and unloved, -torn apart and .guilty. Some feel that their pareliti are forcing them to choose between mom or dad. Others feel abandoned and frightened as they watch the secure founda- tion,of their family Crumble. , Dr. Howard Irving is working to change the system. Through a new alternative known as divorce mediation he is making divorce less of a bombshell and more of a peaceful compromise. The prime objective in divorce mediation is to create a amiable agreement between separated couples, one that allows them to act in the best interests of their children. Pilot project "A large percentage of children out there are suffering because they become pawns in their parents' battles," says Dr. Irving. The University of Toronto professor was the guest speaker at the Huron Centre for Children and Youth's annual meeting in Goderich last week. Divorce mediation is not a new concept for the Clinton based centre. For the past year the Centre has been working to develop such a program. A pilot project, the first of its kind in this area, it attempts to help separated, divorc- ed and divorcing couples make mutual out- of-court settlements for child custody and access. Dr. Irving calls the Huron Centre project, "an innovative program." Counsellors at the Centre work with couples to develop plans that will be in the Plan to deliver your white beans direct to Hensall Co-op or Mitchell Co-op. Your support is necessary to maintain a viable FARNIER.OWNED CO.OPER-ATIVE business in the marketing of your beans. COECIP ADVANTAGES $27.55 per metric tonneDELIVERY INCENTIVf, o VOt per bushel minimum for 0 to 10 miles radius, additional 1C per bushel permile to a maximum of 30C per bushel• TRUCK ING ALLOWANCE • PATRONAGE DIVIDENDS - on profits earned !,.EXCELLENT FACILITIES for fast efficient service • TRADE CO-OPERATIVE!! We con-tinue to work for YOU even after you have sold your crop! • WE APPRECIATE AND NEED YOUR BUSINESS!! Ives individual and joint 00014 s witb, ounsellors and couples. After as few,as five seSsinne*ngreements are *We and lawyers finalize the set - Mediation promotes personalized agreements, that reflect all aspects of the couple's and children's livesIt encourages joint custody, **re both parents establish equal, but flexible; responsibilities, geared specifically to meet the child's needs. No winners, no losers Mediation has been called the positive ap- proach to divorce. It deals with compromise and understanding, unlike the court system where winners and losers are determined. Dr. Irving explained that divorce court puts couples at opposite ends, "When one party starts to fight, the other will likely fight back." Divorce, he noted, "Is not like Monopoly. There is life after separation and divorce. No one can win in an adversary situation. They get back through the kids." The mediation alternative stresses that co-operation between parents can exist after divorce. The process asks parents to think primarily of their children. It takes the responsiblity from the lawyer's hands and puts it back to the farreily. "The family are the ones who have to live with the consequences of the decision and mediation lets them make the decision," Dr. Irving said. Young artistic • • To celebrate seven years of service, the Huron Centre for Children and Youth needs a "logo" and is asking young artists to sub- mit design for it. The logo will be used for displays, stationery and announcements pertaining to the Centre. The Centre's logo should tell people that the Centre is a good place for families, children, and teenagers to come to talk • • .,. • - • V, .z.,!:w4oeligreinattltilostotatidteo,riknee;toedsuhteinosf . We only want them to be Mediation stresses still a fanally and they n that divorcing couples should continue to work together as a unit. Facts show that 70 to 80 per cent of the couples who use mediation reach satisfac- tory, durable agreements. Litigation junkies In 004004 Maples who battle in court often return tocourt, time and time again. Dr. Irving calls them, "litigation junkies - they become addided to the process. They believe it miia always be a win -loss situ& tion, not a eompromi.se." Mediation doesn't exclude lawyers. In fact, counsellors advise couples to .each have legal representation. Lawyers help finalize agreements that are developed through mediation. Dr. Irving believes that mediation counsellors and lawyers shotild have a team work approach to divorce set- tlements. The ultimate goal of mediation is family life after divorce. Mediation doesn't mean that .couples have to like each other, says Dr. Irving, but it promotes that idea that adults can put their hostilities aside, for the sake oef, rt eh eni rotchildren.advocating that they have to go out for Sunday brunch with the kids," he noted. "In the final analysis it has to be: the children And the parents who have to live with the'greement," Dr. Irving said. • talent wanted about problems. With the assistance of the Clinton Op- timists and MacLean Home Hardware in Exeter, prizes of a portable stereo are being offered for the best design in each of three age groups and a bonus fourth stereo is to be awarded to someone choSen at random from all non -prize-winning entries. You could win Turn to page 3 • ' The Huron Centre for -Children and Youth elected a new board of directors at their annual meeting, held onSeptember 12. Executive members include (front row, left to right) Secretary Deanne Dixon of Belmoire, Past Secretary Tory McKenzie of Itayfield, Past Presi- dent Bev McNeil of Walkerton, Vice President Lima ate/teazle of Clinton. (Back row) Directors Ruth Ann Steckle of Zurich, Nancy Larone of Seaforth, Yvonne Campbell of Bayfield, Bev Harris of Kincardine and Patricia Muratori of Bayfield. 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