Exeter Times, 1901-2-14, Page 2COST
-r-IING;ro SQUARE G000 OT (fli
The reu1 weeleen neceei
eeeiee k to cets tu eckcill,
A, young leaceelor met
3e4eneee meee-end peered out nee ta
et
we in SOMEthing like this:
"I say, old (hen, hie up againat
Tenterrow is tO0 bittlItthY ot rot' be
gira matt teurse, I want to, ma
tear v,0320,e„ gori of a ereseate 1 o tal
YOU the treat have premised her
gold be beetle that she feneiee. b
the dereea thing et s $25, and all th
Monett I caa ;ale* and straee atet no
is. a teggarly ale. Nero, it email 1
tee have tete ether $15 ill Wl it bah
aex* pate data"
The merried ntaa wes not flush 1r -
e( eiteet tease, late as he Onew
friene waa ell reett, end reelly withe
tQ do aim a favor, he sesid:
-da hateveret the money about pee, ba
rii $toe vitae 1Udo. I have a
t at Blraules Jewelry sbop. Let'
-go &w there mod see the buckle. r
buy t ad have It ;charged to my a
veep ad yea eese Imed me the ;2
sane' tt terete the arst of the moat
Seinen the bill wall te reedeeed."
Tbe Scheme wet -lied to e therm. Th.
Young man with die "beet gal" was de
teNlaitteet_. t OW! the bactile watt carried et
tottutuith. That neutd; itave been tie
Cad of the epettede deuatteet, ked
z•cw.u cortnectioa with the lati vt to
I Loudon of the tete Stale er Pe si
any steree a e told whi a ou
; satire apon the polities of the East.
One of theee taleS, al91e alnUsing per-
lato thatt, true. is that be etronglY
et , adviaell the Prince of Walea to malty
Xtt anra-Y with a eertalla indueatial
t man who bad. groane to Oowertol to
d i ette safe."
at Another etoty is vouched tor on, bot -
ter evIdeuee. slaah was tae n to
7 Visit Newgate Pelson, aud after a,
tote/et-that extended exanituatiou
4
suddenly requested to se au exeeue
tam. With the utmost piattexass, the
' warden of ttle prisoa explaiued that
d 4n/104301Y 110 one was limier eentenee
; ivat at that- tinte; bat the than tame:-
: .1tway the objectIons vita wa,ve of
le I als, baud.
• "Tette (tee of my sulte,"' tee geld.
II ! etePY oue wilt
e- Greatly to his alsapematmeut tlae
t efaciale deeltnea be comply with his
1,• requeet.
e
Statesman. legtelater. adraluietrater,
h erator. eeteutist aud philetoehert (be
' late Estate of Argyle was a 'blight ax-
e: ;
t =Meat of the aoble sphere la which
e be watt-otorn. saye the Youth's Core-
d Ralthtt-t-
e late maw another Man let raulf.
he :Mind ale exalted POsiti9n g 1010Y
eat). awl tete teolatien bas be neatly
desertbed by au lantteeper ou the
o dune's vetate.
• "Hie graVet" reatarlted the Seoteh,-
iu sera cleetteult poseetioe
g • whatever. We prhie of intellect mill
: reh let bah 4Q15 wh mea ot
; • eta birtb4 and Me pride of birth will
, taeO let him aseoclate =ea. or ids
• ton IntelleCt"
the wife at tae leader, get hold of th
bill during tee abeeeee et her etrabaa
On a, bUSineaa trip. Judge ef bis; eca
hterlOttion awn reeeivtpa 4 ttilegralp
15 theete weals:
"Come !Wale el ewe, team allt
Takiag the tett tratri he rettettedth
VEY. teok 4 Pab te tade testae. and
Ideielaino upstalre the steps a a ttme
etttered hlt Lath-co:a feuncl
Wife15 teare, while vetteged15 Walt
tag ber trona.
"Yon 'Melted, deceitful wretclel"
eactaimea. betweeg eo;As.W11 wonld
haye believe -I that yoa weald deeeiv
nat, tIlla way/ 1 aut going biome,
Meetatstedeotten! 1 wit -ea -with
bad atn-aes--- teener lett ter at allee
hoo-leott-heett"
"Deoeive year' erted the freatleaml
bewilderta busbaua, "whet tter tata
Sziefeale 'Mee. what -why. never det
eeivea yea ia aty life."
Ova, tete etillei there and try
to• hat eat cl SO I /mow ant, 1 allow
aU Kismet the nuottg. tea, here la
tho bill ter the atact belt ,yeit heagnt
her: To abltin that it etteettl ever
Nome itle-ettseetauttca beer
Tben eon/earl the cepter.e tears oata
tette, Witee tiee wife's gelef bad elven
gpent itteeta !a teaest tbe hueband sot
alt opperlautte to explataauti it t00%
retaarkabte elloqueuee end abundance
of et:treacs etratehten reatteee eta,
ollut waelht it a narrow ezcape?"
irattl be, Ca Ice detailed the ettay.
"Everythine, waz ea. -sleet me. It bad
Ec4lo. certainly. Alter
th15. wheu frleatt watatte au aceme-
Madattort he gets it in coot ea:5h, it I
110.Ve tgo• oitt and barrow
elodeet etequeet,
I • Tbe recent VIM of- Queen Iricterit
, to Irelaud. brough out not a little wit;
the example ethich follows bears the
tang of its own soil::
queea's farewell letter to the
Irish peepIe was dated from the Viet -
Regal thde.e. Dublbs, Said a morel.
Wet Irlet Natioueliet Member et Par-
tlement:
t'lt was the Regal Lodge ter the
time beteg; end laiJeed, for many a.
the tea Leeched the vice out of
I tt
'Say', 'Wormy, e I bave the tore?"
lir WM la a rage.
lie was a dissipated looking Inca -a-
tm!, though cheesed in the latest chyle,
1-1,3 paid his faro and sat la the ear
quietly for a wane. Then he opened
his lips and suddenly carolled:
"rm only a bird in a gilded cage.
A. beautiful sight to see."
All the passengers turned and lookel
at him inquiringly. The diesipatee In-
dividual paused and looked at the pee-
vengers and smiled.
"I beg par'on," he said, "I beg par.
'an. All ri. No sham done. I ain't
no bird. Bien got winge. I halal got
no wings. I'm carnet. Thash what I
Ile lifted his voice and sang again:
"I'm only a eo.rael in a gishied cage."
Be paused again. "No' I ain't no I
camel. lear'on me ladies, pleasit
on me. I ain't no camel. Caemel
can go sheven days without drinkine
I couldn't go ..seven minutes wiShout
drinkine hippopotamus. Thast.
what I am."
"I'm only bip'pot-mus ge-hied
eag,e, '
A beaulut thing thee." a
"No, aitt't no. hip'posh-muS. Hip"-
poshmus lives in water. I couldn't live
in water. Don't like water. Ish all
rite to wash clothes in. Ain't no good
to live in. 1 gesh I'm. a bird after all.
For if I'm bird, then I can ily ti,
MOM THE SEST THINKERS
There Is a working' elass-etrong
UU1bePPY-antong both rich and
peer; there la on We eh -lee -weak
withed anil ralteerable-among both
rich and poor. .And the -worst of the
ratsuuderstaudinge arleing between
tne two orders come of the unlucky
fact that the alee or Ono Claas bab-
atually contemplate the foelish of thO
other. When men are righttully oc-
cupied, their aratmentent grows out ot
their work as the color petals out of
a truttful flower Ile only at advanc-
ing15 Iila wintee heart ts getting sott.
er, whose blood warmer. whose brain
quicker. vrhosh spirit le entering lute
livIng peace."-Jolin Retail:a
aeoPle are eo rldiculotts with their
carrying their fool's caps
tnawares, thintang their own liee
Opaque While everybody's 4153
transparent; malting themselves ex-
eeptions to everything, as if when all
the world looked yellow under
they alone were rosy. -George Etot.
mem*
'VS all men's office te speak pationet
To those that wring under the load 01
sorrow;
But no man's virtue Or suflicienCY
To be so mortal whet* he shall endure
The Hite biraself. -Shakespeare.
What though the sea be ealea,? Trust
to the shore,
hips have been drowned, where late
they domed before, -Herrick.
Every man should know something
of law; if he knows enough to keep
mit of it, he is a pretty good lawyer.
-H. W. Shaw.
The love of justice in most men Is
merely the fear a themselves suffer -
ng from Injustice. --La Rochefaucauid.
Defer not till tolmorrow to be wise;
To -morrow's sun to thee may never
rise. -Congreve.
fn the eyes of e wise Judge, proofs by
easbning are of more value than wit-
esses.-Cicero,
A. raind is not to be changed by
lace or tirne.-1Vfilton.
Habit is more powerful than nature
Rufus.
saloon. I'm goin' ily now." And he
got off the car and disappeared, sing.
ing:
"I'm just an ostrich in. a gishled
"Ffe's a bird, all right," said the COD
ductor. .
sike*tinderstoodJ.
Mrs. barite -a do .wish, John, tnat
you would explain this Chinese ques-
tion to me.
Mr. Sparks -Its very simple, Maria.
You see, the Rumians don't want an
open door, but desire to keep a slice of
China for themselves. Now, the Japa-
nese want an open dear and wiSh to
keep Russia from keeping a sliee of the
country. On the other hand, Germany
is trying to keep Japan from keeping
Russia. from cliceing the door, and also
wants to keep her frOm keeping Rus-
sia's keeping a, slice ef China. Now,
America only has a trade interest, but
51 oh eau keep Germany from keeping
ice of territory, the door can be
kept open. See?
Mrs. Sparks -Oh! yes, Anyhow, the
weather's so warm there that the Chi-
eese will find it more comforta.ble to
lseep their doors open. Still, I can't
see why the Powers are making such a
1WS over A little thing like that-Philat
eclphia Enquirer.
"Yoe remember that,bank teller who,
.e.lace- hinase,If so Solid with the officialej
by suggesting -that the bank employe*
should wear clothes without potkete i
daring ba,nkbag houre2"
"Yes. What about liittaiv I
"Be got away with ;60,000 by ttirowe
lag it out of the et -111(101'0 to -a etettfeat 1 it
er te " 01 ,
SIDE VIEWS OF LIFE
Better an. ounce of to -day than a
pound a fo-morrow.
'Your secret is your servartt, but give
ft liberty and it becomes your master.
The real proof of the pudding is 111
the state of your health the morning
after you have eaten it.
Man's inhumanity to man enablea
the polic.ernan to draw his salary.
The oftener a man's idols are shot,
tered the less he cares for divinities.
A woraan's curiosity will go twice
as far as her pin money. -
The pessimist who is always looking
for something to rail at can find it in
i mirror.
. .
Babies are coupens of interest at-
tached to the et- ; of nee:rineony.
Better one enetny that you are sure
of than a dozen doubtful friends.
The 'widower who goes to court a
second time merely moves for a new
trial. -Chicago News.
An injury forgiven is better than an
Injury revenged.
A physician says that people who
sicep with their mouths"-eleut live long -
When a woman Is really in love
eith a man she thinke lie looks grace-
ul eating soup.
A widow s grief cannot always be
eaeured hr its sighs. t
a , evelaad Aq4lez,
I Y v CAN'T BE, ACCURATE
Uwe: Yoe wish to nt nrifuent la tb
rreseuee t seeeny.
-111 tell You. a good story, boas," eel
the hat as therh was a. pause tn the
oleversation; "irs about a lady, teo.
Instantly there waa 2, matting ot
e
"That story about Matt Archibald,
lave?" laterrupted his wife.
Yes toY dear, the oue I told you
snoet the other day. It happened this
way. I wee going, down Fifth eveaue
"You to me BreadwaY. My love."
"Yes, 1 thintt it Was Broadway, lent it
Ooesa't matter numb. At all events, X
trawsvaa Loll:: ado. Jul ItNo.aeraisr, w_hen a lady',
"1 thinle you're mistaken, butby. You
2ertain1y said 'pink" When you had ine
the story."
"Well, let it go at that -it wee either
blue•or pink -awl a white deass"--
"No; the was areesed all in blue
A
doitat you remember?"
The best gave his wife a 10O1 that
mate from a marble heart. $be kept
looRtng at we'-.--.
*%% dear. eve did at Iter."
Wefl couround it. we both located
at each other. Her face (teemed fateal-
tar ta me. She was tripping along,
beating as tresb. as a, Peach, 'when Mil-
deulY she slipped on 4 banana skin am!
Vreke her leg" --
Reginald. her ankle?'
"Bless my soul. Mrs. 13., would YMI
JU tet t1i the rest ottthe start'?"
"Now, deal oet Mal, dear, but do be
Accurate."
"Well," she brelte ber bleeseel Annie,
or twisted, it mai I had the eatisface
tie% of carrying her into the aearest
ug etore, She etailect a, sweet smile ;
t auen-eae,
"I think you are mistattee again, '
aartiea., You teal we the Was anemie
egious."
"Yes, 1 know, bet that Was befoee-
/ meau. atterwood-I raeau-Mrs,
you get me rattled. Please (loan tater.,
rnpt Site smiled at we game ttme,
aityleow, anl seemed to thault we in a
Mute manner."
"One moraeut, dear. You eertabely
teld Me the Was YOlobIe in her thaalta
efterwara,"
"Yee, yes. Sate Ara1 telling this
Lary or are aon? I asked her It I
abould call an ambulance. She tthisp-
ered 'Not get ine a cab. I got ner
atanecna"-----
"No, don't you reauember, darlIngan
automobile."
"Great Scott! madam-I-bereboya,
let's go to the clubi"
THE HIRED 11/10THER-'N-LAVV
G7ORGIE'S PA ALL SttorITS
lAas, !Neu ameotietter tee ltiOi4 Aron
Good Deal Lately.,
"I been thinking a good Deal latel
Paw told lae the othea Ulte after he
SUeT4alg over the an of the chair.
MAW Qerninenet, edging away then,
leeetee aotuet lately the gets hied, of
ecared of pant Wtiell heh beea Thiakee
nub. •
After the waited walk for Itipa te
tell es aboitt it she est;
What d ?"
tAlt tale talk about rich. men,"
says. °Here's some young tello Dq
at New Yorit witie niaety-tiaree m
lion dollars, Tbat wants to lead
hiamelese life and get tie "tame we
I Vetted by the papers in nearly aa
print as they write up the girl that g
! cut to pieces mid threw in a Ill
Vmd, wtere they Found her ooreet as
pocket Bo* with a. lueky stone ia
Poor hod, it almost Makes illy he
•Weed for Ulna.
"'What Can a rith man do?' Can
go into the pantu when ha e9111
home all Hurig:r3r, in the afternoon, a,
eut VICK1g__,C,St a napple ida
then stand there getting a. Little e
t toyment in liftt lay weeping% ap the e
, try 3uicei oa or the, pan and tickets
offun his fiagersa Nce Y th
have a butler that net to Battle for•t
Eagltelt nobilita, and pretty sopa
gete to dreaming' at nitratliat ent
Some thereat° Annie We tipping
bts plate to get, the last epoouTut
gravy or tieing bad grammar Bete
I tne butler, so his hole life is a herr
11 bull nitemere with, a baler behin
every door.
"The rich, man calet get up la ti
Moraing to build the Are in tne tux -
anti and take out the athes. eitne
becon the pellea it het by Steam, ate
ttle,y tare, stunintildY to stay oll /al
and Watch. it. So there's where 1.
gets ribbed of exereize, and prittY stto
tbo diePePsY begins to break out a
Over Itha, and life is a Dull gray wast
°Full of meals that melte him sick a.
the stammi* if he even smells the
trent the Pant block,
But one of the wcaet Tbings abou
bein' rielt ia yet to come. I don't SS
how they eau bent it eoreetimets, Hon
est. I dOn't, It's Ole. Just think
Then youret rith yea can't btre 'ho
e neve is a notIcea.ble inereeee
vegeta.namsne tet Ishtleaelphia. A
the corner of Para avenue an a Berl
t street there is a church. •svien5e attend
go ants are all vegetarians. It, is a
Evangelmal caurele anti thrters in its
creed from ether denominations en the
fact that its reteMbers are pledged to
I forego a aiet. of fleet. -
A Freneh plumber named Garand
; underpeole a short time ago be ride a
bicycle roupd the stone coping at
A house at Lyons sixty feet above the
, street, and successfully accomplished
the foolha.rdy feat.
fl -
a ;
Many officers of the British Army
elg are new wearers of armor. AS gell-
ot eral rule the mail is inclosed la kath
pr casing, which is sewn inside the -
d , tunic so as to be ievisible unless the
It.. garraent is picked to elm. Apd the
a# same with the helmets -a similar
, devise is Axed as lining, so as to give
b.e • eddittoaal ProteetiOn in ease of need.
e,s
nd At a recent fur stile a Parisian puro
td chased in the open tnarket a black.
Siberian fox enin, da inches by a ine
e.., thes, payiute for it the sent of MOM
it Whea dressed it will cost, its wearer
he 5/051),atiOua, has etill the old-fashioned sYO-
.
be tent of private letter -carrying. Letter -
shops are to be tomtit ill every town.
ht It he aaa a letter to seutl the Chinarnaet
re goes to a letter -shop and bargaius with
• the keeper thereof. He pays two-
thirds or the cost, lea.ving the re-
ceiver to pay the rest on delivery.
10 To prevent tae carryin of plague,
I Dr. Apery, or Cepstaetinople, proposes
, to kill rats ea board ehlp by carbonic
aeld gas, The gas,"being heavier than
tte. tbe alr, would eink to the bottom of
the hold and there etille the rodents,
u A strange elnelt was made during the
e last century for a Feetath aablernan.
t The dial Was horizontal, and tbe fig-
, urea being bollow, were ailed with -
different sweets or spices. Thus, runt
t ; nitig bis linger alone the hand, by taste
e leg the ovoter eeuldhell the bour with-
- Out a light.
• The healthiest spot in the world is
Allas011e a Frencla village containiug
forty people. Tweetty-eight ot the int
1' habitants aro over eighty year e ot age,
O g and three have passed a century.
✓ There area() graves in the local ceraet
tertt and the oldest initebita.nt caanot
r , remember seeing a funeral,
Th largest and Most cutnbersonM
form of money is found in Central
Africa, ether* the aattvee use a cress
-
Shaped igot ot copper ore over ten
Inches long. It is heavy enough to be
a formidable weapon.
I
vitt tei the Iroaore,i1 G nest at the %Veda Eu/
Soon, to .14thi)
- That ugly'old women might prevent
ttheor tin.rmstiethati,:tu, porof mstitsiete iresudvaamesteagdes,
Oertllugo-chomnioct true proven, s 0 rbY). Jtullset tZ:el 1;0.7111e/2g
trom Vienna., Austria.:
A Poor workingmaa sitting one evea.
drinking cheep wine, confessed him- 1 Genuine
Ing with _some armies ie a tavern,
vett in great trouble. His sweetheart,
4 poor 000k, neither young nor beau-
tiful, threatened him wita court ero-eeedlugs a rt e r s
ia.rtheevreefrynsed ta make good his •
Promise or marrying her. He shook •
his head eugoestiou made ay i Little Liver
his friends, "I know of only one • ft
thing," he sighed, "that might induce
the girl to reliaquist her leold on me,
and titet is if I can. show her that her
proopective mother-in-law has hair on
her teeth and le posses -tea at an evil
"Whoop!" oried one of bis etymptte ;
thizers, "rnY oWn mother-in-law would I
mat exactly! if you ain't afraid of her, I
and will pay me for it, I will loan her
to you. The girl will be sure to rull
away as soon as she see e leer."
Pe, the betrothed, went at once to
look at the old vraman, and found her
as repulsive looking as described. On
eoadition that he pay her e2 she agreee
tO pley the rote of bie 3110ther at a
SO011 to take place ;between
aereelt her "sea" and the girl. Theu
the faith:law lover ieformed bte afa-
enced that on a given day ble naother
would come to Vienna for a meeting a?
a certain hetet.
'At the aPpointed day and hour tate 1
trio met, and Mary, the poor girt, near,
ly fainted atm Pepf introdueed the
ugly ola womaa as tis mother. But
aim soon compoeed terself aad trled
to get on friendly terms with thie sup.
KIDNEY DISEASE
posed mother-in-law. Pepi grew ire-
The Maid and the Cleveland Man,
tto hnown railroad man, wbo le
aJs o a elty oflietal, to* an eaetern
daunt with hie wire last month and
finally reached Bar Harbor.
When be stepped up to the clerk or
:the leadieg fashionable hotel of the
place be wa.s a little appalled at the
eoutersaptuotts Manner la whiclt that
Magnificent creature (teemed to regard
such paltry trifles ha.rd earned
room In the house for one wee::
Will cost each oceupant $17," he re -
Marked in bis airy mauner, as ho
looked straight throttgh the attnote '
Vier() Just eleatte the questioner's hat,
'Lull meals?"
"Meals are $24 per week for eacb per
ma"
There was a. Inlet silence, , during
vbieh the Cleveland man made a, rapht
Mental calculatlene,
ogairi put In his oa.r,
But before he eeuld Speak the clerk
a
"In addition to the other charges," ha ,
remarked tn. a, voice as monotonous as II
Dan Dalya,, "each guest. must pay 51-1?
or the meld."
The Cleveland man smiled. He tan- , m
tied he had the clerk this time,
"Why, we haven't any maid," ha' 101r1
CloaCkled.
"7 Understand," said the clerk in his 0
iciest manner. "But I did not refer to
your maid. 1 referred to our maid. Each te
guest of the house will pay $10 per
'Week for the services of the maid in „
caring for the room occupied by salt) tt
guest."
The Cleveland man stared. He is fa- -Intl
miller wth hotels of every deseriPtion al
and in a.11 sections of the country, but
never before run tip a.gainst
SIoaue to ride trour horses, Beeoz he'
tide nit with tho Prints or Wales
Tbara almoet attar to, make a, budd
;with taglaty =hint= lose faith in th
hereafter. I don't :wander at them to
enying "What can a. rich man ilo?'
"Of course, atter he got sixty o
ninety atitlyuns he mite quit gitting
eallY more, if be :wanted to try Some-
thing nobuddy else ever Clot of before
but There's where the trouble Comes in
again. Tberets where he bast to obey
the Dia 'Mite of consbence. You:see
Goa gave him hie mutiny. 1 don't no
whether Gail gives the poor man his
levee Children and greasy ovornalls or
not. Bt God gives the rich man hie
Munny. We no that, beeoz oue of them
told us about God says: 'Here, take
eee, Handing out a Few bales of
Cheeks, 'end Get them cashed and do
Whatever you want to -with them.'
"So there, YOU see, he la in a. corner,
and can't get away, lie bast to think
Of the palefaced wires and Hunehy
hildren. of the men That work tor btm
What would they clo If he gait owning
the Mines or ttat railroads or factorlea,
Nvhere his income is $63 a, minute?
here would be their sad eyes Staring
t him in the Dark, and whenever the
ace curtains In his bedroom got rassla
y the gentle, breeze he would think it
as the sob of some Starve,d baby.
aye pittio tor the rich man taat can't
uit, becost-"
"But if he would give up the worras,a
aw sad, "wouldn't. somebuddy else be
fling to econe along and Run them,
r open up some others at the same
ind, so the men wouldn't need to get
ut of a job?"
Paw looked at maw kind of soli=
r about a eecond: Then he sed:
'There's Just the trouble. Mebby
hen God gave him his munny He
ended hint a list of other people he
ustn't let get rieb, too. Don't ever
ante a rich man Before you find out
1 the Facts.' GEORGIE
--S. E. Kiser in Chicago Times-ale.raid
Two U. S. Supreitte Court Janet. _
An eminent lawyer, one of the most
en:anent in the 'United States, was in
the midst of an arguneent In defence of
the patent rights of his client to a new-,
tangled collar button tb.at was being
unlawfully manufactured by the people
on the other side of the ease. The dis-
tinguished counsel was describing the
patent referred to,, and its many ede
vantages. When Justice Shires itter
rupted him, and, in a. most seriouv
manner, observed:
"I should like to ask the Married
counsel if has chent manufactures a
collar button that won't roll under the
quite so hard a proposition. But he
straightened timself and reached for
the pen,
"I'll call your mcrollMental bluff." he
said. "Gimme a room!"--Clevelane
Plain Dealer,
The Zxperiinent Was Not a StteceSa
Frequently she had complain.ed that
he was not as he used to be; that hiss
lave seemed to have grown cold and
that be was too prosaic and matter -ef-
fect. So when he found one of bis old
love letters to, her he took it with him
next tinie lee was called may from the
city, Made a copy of it and m.ailed it to
her.
"John alem7," she exclaimed when.
he returned, "you're the biggest fool
that ever lived. I believe you have
softening of the brain. What did yoe
mean b -y sendiee me that trash?"
"Trash, my _me!" he expostulated.
"Yes, trash .ust sickly, sentiment0
nonsense."
' That isn't Lew you described it when
first wrote it and sent it to Yout"elle
prote.eted. "You said thee it was the
dearest, eweetest letter ever written,
imd you insiet now that 1 have Changed
Sad you laaven.l. I, thought I woulO
-Well, you didn't succeed," she inter-
rupted, and she was mad for two days.
Sometimes it is mighty diffietilt to
please a woman. -Chicago Post.
lie Was Satisfied.
„."Goin'. the whole way," mister?" in-
quired the passenger' with the „green
necktie, as he ti.:ok out , his snuffbox
preparieory to ,settling himself for a
crpes-exanaination.
The party interrogated eyed him at
fentively, 'then replied:
"Na. get out at the third elation I
am going to; collect some money due
to me for groceries supplied. You see,
j ath a wholesale grocer. The business
was ef to the by my father. I am
married, and have five ehildren. The
eldest ie twelve years old. I ana ex- e
eetly twelve years and nine months
"rattled. I live in a ' semi -'detached
eeuse rented at el.6. My wife is fair '
ted." •
Of eo,uose the court was shacked.
Some young people in. the seats re
f
eerved4or spectators tittered and the
marshal, rapping on his desk with his
gavel; roared 'Silence in this honorable
court!" The eminent counsel main-
tained his gravity, atthough leis' soul
must have been deoplY stirred, and had
presence of mind -enough to turn the
Incident to his own advantage, saying
with emphasis:
"I have the honor to inform the court
that the collar button ma.nufaettired by
my client is unique in that aewellas In
other respects, but my client would not
be so selfish as to patent so important
a benefit to mankind."
The only other time, so far as any-
body can reme,reber, that a jelte was
perpetrated in the supreme court was
When Thomas Wilson of Washington
was arguing a case. Some paorile insist
that he did not intend to be funny but
made his remark in sober earnestneue.
However, Mr. Wilson was arguing a
ease of importance and was dwelling
bpon propositions that were known to
and accepted by every la,w student in
the country, When he was interrupted
by the late Justice Miller, saying;
"Cannot the counsel safely' assume;
that this court understands the rude,
t
nents of law?" ,
"I made that mistake -in the lower
ourt," retozted Mr. WilSon, "or this
ase would not have been here on ap-
eal."--Chica.go Iteeord.
e0,18.
Practice Trbat you prettele--Young.
Brevity la the soul of telt-Maks-
pare.
Obedience ts the bond of rule. -Ten-
nyson.
Relnenibrance oft raay start a tear. -
Surest
Death but eattattbs the body; life the
sout.---Young.
All is not false which seems at first
a lie. -Southey.
Be thou familiar, but by no means
vutgarte-Shakspere.
-Choose an author as you choose a
frieltdoScommom
Often °huge cloth please a woman's
Mita -Sir T. Wyatt.
,Blood only serves to wash ambi-
tion's bands. -Byron.
Ask me no questions and I will tell
you no fiba-Goldsmith.
Courage rpm hearts, and not from
numbers, grows. -Dryden.
Curses, like young thickene, come
home to roost. -..Southey,
Only they know how to live who
five to die. -Whyte Melville.
All argument will vanish before one
touch of nature. -Colman.
Dangers breed fears, and fears more
dangers bring. -11, Baxter.
Character must be kept bright, as
well as clean. -Lord Chesterfield.
Custorn is the Pillar round which
opinion twines, and interest is the tie
that binds lt.-.T. L.„Feacock
God weigheth more with b.ow much
love a man. worketh than how ranch
he doeth.--Thonaas aJCenapis.
Some people are always grumbliai7
because roses have thorns. I am
thankful that thorne have roses.--AI-
fhonse Karr.,
The heart which can carry the bur-
dens and sorrows of even the mot
orsaken, which can make room for
the griefs and toils and cares of the
hapless multitude, is Ailed ev,tiecut,
measure with the life and love of
God. -Charles P. B. Miel.
,
and weighs twelve, stone, he was a
dairy maid before r marrie her, and
has be -en vaccinated twice. 1113r bank
book is worth e..500. I was educated
at a public school:"
The 'men' with the given aeektie heti
ilieettiefiee look as he inquired
"What did your great-grandfather dO,
(or a living?"---Zondon Answers.
Tile Essential Thing.
clioGouing to learn to Play tt.e cornet,
'0?1, to,you thinit t•oar toiled is good
ri"Ogh, can blow the ies'trument
all
64,4. 4.1,
A'g'ueltles, but -"mean do you think yott
could outrun tiny pareuer?"-Philadel-
Religion has riot primarily come to
man by deliberate ,ratiocination, but
by spontaneous experience. It is the
whole of man resportding to the whole.
of God. Human nature. has not
thought out, it has experienced relig-
,
ion. -John White Chadwick. -
Try to realize God's 'presence; the
realizing it ever so little has a Wonder-
fully soothing and ealming infleence
on the heart. Say secretly: "The Lord
is in his holy temple (his temple of
the inner raan); keep silence, 0 my
heart, before hem." Th 'e mind wants
steadying many tinesa. day. -E. M.
GbSuciebnutricniene .'inernorat matters is an
active ally of immorality. Who is not
for against. Tie uniVerse
have no neutrals In these questions.
in theory as , practfee, dodge or
hedg,e, or talk as we like about a wise
e'cepticism, We are really doing volun-
teer military service for one side or
the other. -William Janie&
The soul is such an instrument that
no sooner is it Set in peace with. itself
than it becomes .an instrument in tune,
living instrument, discoursing heav-
niy music in its thoughts and chant-
.
ing melodies ko! bliss even in its dreams.
tArhen a soul is in 'this harmOny no
Bros of calamity, no,paine of outward
!orment can for a moment break the
iiovereil,,n spell of its joy. ---Horace
Sush,
ABSOLUTE
SECURITY
Must Bear Signature of
,
See Fae.Sisnife Wrapper Below.
Tear omen, sae as ems
to take as sugar.
CARTER'S
ITTLE
1VER
PILLS.
FOR REAOACRE,
FOR
FOR RILIOUSNEOL„„
FOR TORPID LIVEI4
FOR CONSTIPATION,
FOR SALLOW MC
FOR THECOMPLEXION-
25 cents ilial7r7iir:,,,are,"-.1";„,„,4
Prisi ece 8..
CURES= HRAPACHE,
patient. and Wyly reraluded his ; FOR TEN YEARS.
A Glen Miller Man's Terrible
Trial.
"inamma" that aeetorclieg to eoutract
the hauSt znake aerself as disagreeable
ae possible. She did. She began bi-
consuming an astonishing quaatity ot
wine, and would not leave all kissing
anti entlerateina" her "dear boy" until
the latter, in desperation, trod vicious,.
ty on her corns to show lier bis disept
prove' of her tactles.
"Miss Mary," the eald, "1 ba,ve made
tnquiries about You. and Ilnd you de -
earring or a. balmy future. 1 will not
lead a hand to parting those belotaging
together. I have entered into this Joke
anderstandlua the real intention or
your betrothed; he only wanted to find
out 11 You would marry him, even E
his mother was such a bag as 1 sin,
1en't it so, Pepi?" 'Mat else could
Pepi do nut murmur "Aye?" Mary
was touched, and embraced tite ugly,
but good natured old WOIllall, Then
moue full Pardon, conapiete reeoncilise
tioa, and at the wedding soon to take
'place the birett raotheran-law will be
the most honored guest,
woolati Vote or ehania.
Pc:ratably the most n,ovel respo
ever made to a request to returu a, vo
of thanks to a chairman was made
Mr. Moody during bis first visit
England. ;
Re bad Attended a meeting at wht
the Bart or Shaftesbury was ch,airma
The duty at Proposing a vote of thanl
was ateigned to him, odad the a
aouncement made.
"Our American cousin, the Rev. M
Moody, ofChicago, will now ,.move
He Found a Cure at Last In
Doan's Kidney Pills.
Mr. r. M. Burk, who is a. well-known
resident of Glen Miller, Hastings Co.,
Ont., was afflicted with kidney trouble fox
ten years,
So pleased is he at having found in
Doan's Ridney Phis a cure for his
ments, tthieh he had begun te think were
incurable, that he wrote the following
statement of his ease so that others simi-
larly afflicted may profit byhis experienee;
"1 have been aftlietedivith kiiiney trouble
for about ten years and have tried several
remedies but never received auy real
beneAt until I started taking Doanta
Kidney Pills, My back used to constantly.,
Ache and tuy tuba° was high colored and
milky loolcing at times. Since I hare
fi
n shed the third box of Doants Itidney
• Pills I am happy to state that I am not
ago bothered with backache at all and ruy
te urine is elm as crystal. I feel confident
by that these pills are the best kidney specific
to in the etnutered'ae..
ch
n.
ts Aro
;
r.
a
vote of thanks to the noble earl wh
Iran presided on this oceesion."
The whole thing was quite out of M
MoOdY's 4ne. English formalitie
might or might not have come grae
fully from his lips had he attempte
them, but be did not. With an tate
cilsregasd of conventianality he burs
upon the audience with the bold an.
uouncement:
"Tte speaker has made two enistakee
To begin with, Pm not the Rev'. MI
Moody at all. I'm plain Dwight
Moody, a Sunday school worker.. An
then I'm, not your American cousin;
by the grace of God, rut your brother
iriterested with you in our Fatheres
After. Wood's Plaospliodius,
The Great Dnglisit RentechO
Sold and recommended by all
druggists in Canada. Only reit-
able medicine aiscovered tete
a facie% guaranteect to aura all
r.
girt=e4siit,!1„t11,1stliv.°7,14VM
forms ot Sexua Wen ess. all effects of abuse
usa 01 T0
a on recelp
of Prie, cae package A, six, St. One tau pleases
e. at -sofa Cure. eamphlets free to any address.
The Wood Company, Windeor, Ont.
r 1 Wood's Phosphodine ts old in Exeter
t by a. W. Browning, druggist.
•I 'Times Clubbing Rates.
FOR 1901.
d TleMs and Weekly Mali
' " " " Globe 1.60
" Farnily Eleralcl & Star 1 75
work for His children,
"And now about this vote el thanks a
to the 'noble earl for being our their- "
man this evenirie I don't see why we
stould thank bim any mare than he
should thank tis. When at one tirae
they- offered to thank our Mr. Lincoin
for presiding over a meeting in Illin-
ois he stopped it. He said he'd tried
to do his duty,' and they'd tried to do
theirs. Ile thought it was about aa
even thing all .around."
That opening fairly"took the breath
away from Mre Moody's hearers. Such
a talk could net be gauged by any
known standard. Mr. Moody earried
hie English autlienee with him from
t,hat beglaning to his latest labors.
%Thy 5 Wit It a Tired Feeliag.,
CC
Montreal Wattess 1,65
" London Free Press 1.75
I" Weekly Sun 1-75
Daily Mail 4.25
Daily Globe 4.25
"
" o Evening Mail 3.25
1
1 " " Evening' Globe 3.25
‘, o Daily Ne2,25
ws
" " Daily Free Press ' 3.25
1
" " Eventng Free Press 2.76
" Christian Guardian 2.00
JOHN WHITE & SONS,
Exeter.
......_______,... .-......, - .
WOMEN WILL TALK.
Can't 131ame them for Tel-
ling each other about Mil.
"Itoo, heo, lit," rang through the burn's Heart and Nerve
"Great Gevernor! What is that?"
house at 2 a. en. pims.
end the head of the house sat up in bed
and blinked at an electric light shining
through the whidow,
"Sohn, stay right where you are; ni
not let you go down stairs to be killecl
Bid you ever hear such a noise?"
"Mama, what is it?" came in an agl-
'tated whisper from the next r6om, and
then the (laughter rushed. wildly intc
tbhKpeaerp,i.
entatitharito.:hwaini)
1(ern.:t ko into 00
highstrikes. I'm. going down . to see
what that."Lls," and he dug up an old
nriazzle-lowlirrg' pistol he had carried
in the 'civil war and that had been load-
ed since 1873. 'Ali show 'em. Every
nian's lionse is his oWn cast-"
"'•}Ir. falt1h4e)°r father dropped 1hped the gun and it
blew a whole corner off the bureau.
The datighter avert under the bed and
the motber,yelled "Murder!" zt.the top
of her longs. ,
"Shut up!" ordered t.he veteran, as he
reached for his artillery. "Stay right
where yon are. I'll -fight my way to the
telephone and get the police. If they
d ger
, old get to shooting down there don: shoW
don't:"
"Hoo, bootroo." just as the light. I knew the bouse .and they
tleman reached the top of the stairs.
He, Yve.nt down like a ea, rtwheel and.
shot a hole in the ceiling as big as ,the
hot.tom of a tub. ' ' ,
"Did.you bear my owl?" shouted,W1b
fie: as he dashed- from the third story. ,
"Got him in the country yesterday -and
,dghaeopntl,I. Poor
ro?hra:::ve' jailinatesilt31-enniageiLLwti.nagl karsoaoliimnit' et wailheebnqlaI, ebffeeeentwoofntdheerprtiiiiiisy. bolt rit uoi pwp etfhae rridusgt rahon, nehgeei rtho,aanni
with inflammatory rheumatism, anti better than for many years', and cannot
the last he SaW of his Owl It was' flying say toomtich in praise of the remedy Wbicb
aver the barn toward- Redaeld.-Detrette restored mh long lost health."
THE GIREP T REMEDY
FOR WEAR riEnvous womEN.
Its only natural that when a woman finds
a remedy which cures her of nervousness
and 'weakness, relieves her painspAnd
aches,puts eolorin her cheek a mivitality in
her whole system, she should be anxiOus
to let her suffering sisters knovv of it.
Mrs; Hannah Holmes, St. James Street,
St. John, -N.B., relates her experience with
this remedy as eolIotes For some years
I have been troubled with fluttering of tbe
heart and dizzine,,s, accompanied by a
smothering feeling, which prevented me
from resting. My appetite was poor and
I was much run down and.debilitated.
"Since T sta.rtod using Milburn's Heart
and Nerve Pills, tho smothering feeling
has gone, rity ha rt beat is now regular,
the flutterin cl'
P'ree PresL;, ,