The Wingham Advance-Times, 1975-12-24, Page 190
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'CAN DIANA
:FURNITURE'
. t ific'lorvTobfos
,. Corner gid FIatbl ck
'Cuprd'
Chairs and benches
Ai1T 9piles
Sp14e+ 0oxes, etc.
Fina, llutternut,. ,harry
end; Maple
WIL,UA:M'WCAS
CARPENTRY
__-Mount Forest 223.2005
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WINGHAM.
•
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•There Is something terribly
Wrong around our house this
year, as +Christmas looms. 11 have
a disturbing feeling that a catas-
trophhy is h the offing;
mat bothers me is that every-
thing is going too well. Two weeks
in advance, the ,turkey was or-
dered,special, fresh -killed, not
one othose frozen, eviscerated,
straw -tasting, morgue -like, pal-
lid blobs. we usually pick up at the
last minute.
Christmas cards were dis-
patched on time (after those rot-
ten posties ended their strike just
a little too soon).
Christmas
oon)-
Christmas gifts were actually
bought and wrapped almost a
week in advance, instead of that
Mad lurch through the stores on
Christmas Eve, snatching up
broken toys, sailed sweaters and
other junk a drunken lumberjack
wouldn't buy, and bundling it into
last second wrappings that were
too skimpy.
We even knew two weeks in
advance who was going to be here
for Christmas. Many a time and
t
oft, our keds have comp poppim
in from hundreds of xnilea away
as late as Christmas snorflj Ig,
without warning.
This year, it's just Pokey .and
his mom and .dad,' the old Battle
Axe, and yours truly. .Grandad .is
going to sit this one out at hoxpe,
alone. Sou Hugh won't be her1e.
He'll be dining on roast llama in
the highlands of Paraguay, if he's
not in jail.
We even have a plum pudding
all ready. You see what I xneaIl?
It is not only all wrong for the
Smileys, it is virtually frighten-
ing. It has never happened be-
fore. It's got to be the calm before
the storm. Something' eerie is
going to happen. Even my wifes
becoming convinced we're going
to get it in the groin, or some
other vulnerable spot.
What has convinced me ,that
the roof is going to fall in, the
final piece of evidence, is 'the
Christmas tree.
Not only was it purchased two
weeks in advance, but it's -a
beauty, a blue Spruce about 10
Service Dhsectory
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GUNS, AMMO,
REPAIRS AND
ACCESSORIES
ABC
SPORTING GOODS
350 Minnie St.
WINGHAM, ONT.
1
ainion FACTORY
OUTLET
ORIGINAL
OLD MILL IN BLYTH
SINCE 1.94
The Casual
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Leather
At the
Railway
Tracks
TEL.
523-9666
WOOL & LEATHER PRODUCTS
WINPOWER
TRACTOR DRIVEN
(P.T.O.) ALTERNATORS
from 7 KW to 100 KW
The money you save dur-
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Toss can buy your alterna-
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SOMMERS MOTOR
GENERATOR SALES LTD.
Tavistoct, Ont. 519-655-2396
Sales and SERVICE since 1937
TRIAN
Distr
LE TIRE
rs Ltd.
W ales I e
and
Retail
PASSENGER - FARM
TRUCK
On the form service
Phone 291.2521
LISTOWEL
P & F Lawn and
Sports Equipment
DEDICATE
GIDEON BIBLES
AS A CONTINUING MEMORIAL
J. A. KIRKCONNELL
291-3211
PLACED IN HOTELS
SCHOOLS HOSPITALS
PRISONS
ALFRED'S
SHOE SERVICE
15 Diagonal Rd. 357-1811
WINGHAM
Specializing in
ORTHOPEDIC
and
PRESCRIPTION
WORK
General Shoe
Repair
MUNTZ
• CAR STEREOS
• CAR RADIOS
• HOME STEREO
• 8 TRACK TAPES
AND CASSETTES
MODERN APPLIANCE CENTRE
Listowel - OMtaris
291-4670
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TO US'
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You'll like them too
a BOWEN PRINTING LIMITED
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Phone 291.-3901
Mount Forest and Winghorn
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PHONE 369-3203
Located an No. 6 Highway
'/6 Mile South of Varney
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,See, the exciting_. n.ew.
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at the Big Bend
Durham 369-3264
A WELL A DAY THE HADCO WAY
Rotary Drilled Wells
Machine Dug Shallow Wells
Caissons-Earthboring
HADCO
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Elmira - 669-3761
TOLL FREE
1-800,-265-8916
•
HARRISTON
PACKING CO.
Give us a call
for
MEAT FOR YOUR FREEZER
-hogs by the holt and whole
-beef by the side and quarter
CUSTOM KILLING TO
YOUR NEEDS
hogs - Tues.
beef - Thurs.
3384330
FOR COMPLETE
INSTALLATIONS
AND
SERVICE
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323-2755
WATSON
elating -vie
115 Fergus Strout South,
Mount Forest, Ont.
•
You don't have to go far
for the best prices on
Tropical Fish and Sports
Supplies for your
Christmas list.
WE STOCK IT ALL!
' `Your Christmas Gift Centre"
I'll PETS 8 SPORT
II
Wallace Ave N Listowel. Ont
*291-3002
DISC JOCKEY
For
. Weddings
. Banquets
. Parties
. Anniversaries
. Christmas and New'
Year's Parties
For more information contact:
STEVEN'S RECORD HOP
ETHEL, ONTARIO
EVENINGS — 887-6159
feet high, tliat.even 1_ooks. like a
Christmas tree. You know, it has
branches. ail around, instead of "
just one side.
This is` ridiculous on all counts.
My usual tree is bought the day
before Christmas. It is one of Lt e
las t,fourr trees ou a lot that heti
300. It is covered with .)now end
ice. It is either eight feet tall and
one foot wide, or it is hump-
backed, or it is one half of a pair
off Christmas tree Siamese twins,
totally devoid of anything on the
side you're not looking at.
I have had trees as bandy-
legged as a cowboy. I have had
huge White Pines, so vast I had to
cut a couple of saw -logs off the
bottom to get them into the house.
One year I had a tree with so few
brapches on it that T had to drill
holes in the trunk, and insert
branches from another tree to
_make it look less skeletal.
I have had trees so crooked that
when they were finally raised
after much sweat and many
maledictions, it was like standing
in the presence of a mall with two
wall eyes, one pointing ° west, the
other east.
My wife used to leave the house
when I was putting up the tree. It
was better that way.
One time, she came home after
two.hours ready to help me deco-
rate our handsome Spruce. She
gave a shriek the moment she
entered the house. She thought it
was on fire. Clouds of blue smoke
were pouring out of the living
room. She heard the sound of
weeping. Her heart almost
stopped.
She rushed in, fighting her way
through the blue air, In the
corner, the fine, bushy Spruce
was lying on its side. There was'
no sign of me.
She started to get sore. "Has he
actually had the gall to get into
the Christmas spirits already?"
Then she heard the choked
sobs, mingled with moans of pain
and rage. She looked at the tree
at one end.
And there I was. Under it. Face
scratched and bleeding. One,
thumb mashed flat by the
hammer. A chunk torn off the
knuckles when the screwdriver
slipped. An expression of -utter
despair on . the tattered counte-
..°fie
That was the year nobody was
coming for .the holidays until
after Christmas. I finally got off
the floor, stood the beast up in the
corner, and took a hockey stick to
.it.
That was the year the tree
never was "put up". Never deco-
rated. When my daughter and
family arrived a couple' of days
after Christmas, it was still
leaning there in the corner.
"What happened to the tree,
Dad?" she queried in horrified
disbelief. ,
"Ah... it was too dry; needles
were falling off. Decided to take
it down, throw it out." Brusquely.
"Needles? It hasn't even any
branches left ! "
Oh well, this year it's going to
be different. Usually we have two
trees, one small and one big. This
year, just one, because of Pokey.
I figure that if we mount a 24-hour
guard, in shifts, we just might be
able to prevent him from trying
to climb it.
And my son-in-law claims to be
an artist. So the tree is ready, and
your faithful correspondent -is
going to sit in a big chair, reading
the Lives of the Saints, while the
artist not only erects the tree, but
decorates it.
All is golden, for once. And yet
...and yet, I have this ser'ise of
unease. Things are too golden. A
lump of lead is going to come out
of somewhere and get me right
between the eyes.
And may you, too, all of you,
have ,a Merry, rather than a
hairy, Christmas.
TOURIST 'MUSTS'
Food and lodging account
for more than 63 per cent of
all tourist spending in Louisi-
LISTOWEL
Clean It
Furniture
Refinishing
and. Repairing -
PHONE HENRY ELMS
291-2567 - Listowel
POWER LAWN
MOWER CENTRE
*Stockists of STIHL
Chain Saws
*Soles and Expert Repairs to
all Small Engines
MOTO-SKI®
HARRISTON
Bus. 338-3616
Res. 338-2717
LISTOWEL TRAVEL
tek,
ror
* AIRLINE TICKETS
* PACKAGE TOURS
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* CAR RENTALS
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AIRLINE TICKETS
ISSUED IMMEDIATELY
ana.
ALL STOCK
IN ALL STORES
2 FOR 1
THE
PRICE
4F
PLUS 1000
December
27, 29, 30, 31
January
2, 3
ONLY 9S
Jeans& Cords 19
1$111111111114f SC
Season's Greetings
to all our customers
TOUR GUIDE — Bruce Dern, dressed up for his role in
"Won Ton Ton, the Dog Who Save Hollywood," discusses a
line with the producer, David Picker.
HOLLYWOOD HOTLINE
Bruce Dern nixes
sick psycho roles
By NANCY ANDERSON
HOLLYWOOD — "The
trouble with me," Brtice
Dern said, "is I didn't start
using my head early
enough:"
Bruce was sitting in the
back pew of a Hollywood
church, reflecting -upon. the
happy turn his career has
taken recently, concluding a
miserable 'length of years
during which he played most-
ly sicko psychos.
He was sitting, in a church,
because a wedding sequence
for "Won Ton Ton, -the Dog
Who Saved Hollywood'' was
to be shot there, and Dern
was to play the bridegroom, a
Hollywood tour bus driver
who'd risen to become one of
the most famous directors of
the silent screen.
The picture is a first-class
production in which Bruce
enthusiastically plays a ro-
mantic comedy role.
"You're really into a cam-
paign when you reach the
point I've reached now,"
Dern opined. "When you be-
gin your career, you're sim-
ply trying to get onto the list
of employables. Then you try
to get employed. Then
you....
"Anyway, that's how it
goes until finally you break
out as some kind of a major
star.
"Then you have to start us-
ing your head when it comes
to choosing parts.
"I didn't start turning down
parts nearly as soon as I
should have. For instance,
there's no way I should have
made 'Bloody Mama.'"
In his neophyte days, Dern
not only made "Bloody
Mama," but "Wild Angels,"
"Cycle Savages" and
"Thumb Tripping."
Then he climaxed his inter-
pretations of psychotic freaks
by shooting John Wayne in
the back ... yes, ma'am, in
the back! ... in "The Cow-
boys."
"It's true that an actor is an
actor only when he's acting,"
Dern continued, "but, at the
same time, if you don't un-
derstand the way this busi-
ness works, if you play the
wrong roles, they will never
let you out of that trap.
"People are inclined toee
you only the way you_mre on
film," Dern said, "and, un-
less you can change that
image, you're stuck.
"To change my image, I
went 11 months without work,
right after 'Thumb Tripping,'
right at the time Diane
( Ladd) and I were getting a
divorce.
"It was a terrifying game,
especially since the guys with
whom I'd grown up in the
business were just emerging
as stars. Jack Nicholson had
just come out in 'Easy Rider,'
and there I was • off doing
'Thumb Tripping.'
"Every time I did. a film,
even a terrible one, people
said, 'Gee, you're such a good
actor.' So I had the inner faith
that somebody; - someday,
was going to have to go to bat
for me,
- "I =k --flew- Wiles» -somebody -
went to bat for me, I'd never
get out of the slump I was in."
Interestingly, the movie
which got Dern out of the
slump , was "The Great
Gatsby," a picture which
drew reviews matching its
box office receipts: both
poor. -
Dern, however, got nice .
personal mention for his work
in the film.
Now, he said, he feels
happily secure.
"I'm not embarrassed any-
more when people come up
and ask me for autographs.
Now I can handle it," he said.
OLDEST GROUP
The New Orleans' Touro
Synagogue, found 140 years
ago, is the oldest Jewish con-
gregation in the Mississippi
Valley. It is named after its
benefactor, philanthropist
Judah Touro.
Copy for Crossroads Ciasti:
fieds must be received by 6 p.m..
Wednesday of week prior to pub
licatio�, .� c„ I
Not c€
SKI MINTO GLEN, open Satur-
day, Sunday and school holidays,
except Christmas, 10:30 a.m. to 5
p.m.; Saturday nights 7:30 p.in.
to 10:30 p.m.; rentals available
for Alpine (downhill) and Nordic
(cross-country) equipment; for
sale from our Pro Shop a full line
of quality skis,boots, bindings,
mitts, goggles, etc. Season's
tickets available. Dial 338 338-2007 or
338-2722. Minto Glen Sports
Centre, Harriston.
to
For Sale
MINTO GLEN Pro Shop is
stocked with a full line of quality
,alpine (downhill) and Nordic
(cross-country) skis, boots, bind-
ings, mitts, goggles, etc. For pre-
season shopping phone 338-2722
for an appointment.
rrb
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