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The Exeter Times, 1886-1-14, Page 2"I tell you be glorious; fun year and propos lor, and see Wha said Cobweb to we were ta int ''What do you a ink about it &lei ' We all agreed t . t it would be glorious fun. Y "But who has Aluck enough to ar‘ it 1" gala Lela Gibes. , .4. who, , „badeed,Olut •r humble ser- , vant I" Bald Cobwi "Oh, ye, s Cobs, i. can do it to perks - don 14 maid SteppW Barnet, clapping her hands in high. glee "and you know the rest of us will be ound where we can hear &lithe fun," id she. "Bub, Cobweb, how will you manage Ib 7" mad Lou, " Iknow you are equal to any emergency, but I don't seem to think of any one you can practice on. this time." , "Well I do,"ald Cobweb, "so keep still a minute and I will unfold a plan." "Go ahead 1" oaid all of us in concert, for we well knew there was something rieb on hand when Cobweb put on that face and manner. " Well. girls," said Cobweb, with a smile, "You knew there is to be a leap - year ball next Monday night at the town nail, and I small ask - Olu Black," as we girls call him," ' Oh," said Lon, "you will never dare 1 He will annihilate you with one of his looks 1" "Oh, psbaw 1 don't you believe your- self. I rather think Cobweb is up to that sorb of thing." "Well, Cobweb," said I, " get the programme all arranged, so that we can all hear the fun." 's ;Proposal. that it la, girits, it would tei take advantage of leg)" to some °rose old bache, he would do about it," he rest of the girls, as wn11; one ;eight. OM that night, and I, determined to take advantage of it. Now I am ready to make you the happiest woman ih the world at aninlme ; the sooner the bettea- What do yea eater Cobweb lazed Up at him, end, seeing that he wae inearneet, wilted, alenthe said, Then ha reached out lila hendtand dew her to kat, paying; "Now it rrasiu8 with you to Pan whether it sha be binding or not. I am Ali willing to at, by my promise ; are you 7 Shallyesen ,er it a bona fide engage- ' or not V' , And he drove her to him andt planted a leiss on her pi.affing lips. "1 don't know; let me go," egad Cob- web. "Y4)14 Will tell xne soon," said he, as he held her feat. "Promise, and I will let you go." She promised, and he said : "Now, gilla, coseae out here and per- suade her she had better marry " Old Black." We all came out, looking theepleh enough I expect. I never saw Cobweb cornered before, but I think she will make it all right. We went home in higla glee. but Mr. Black would basist on eeeing Cobweb home safe, for he said he always raade it a duty to lookout for valuable property. How the affair will terminate I don't know, but I hope she will conclude to have him, for he is really a noble fellow, and then such good tImee we would have going to eee her in that fine old hourse. If the does I will let you know all about It. But we shall, never forget how she looked when ehe dropped on her knees and. rolled up her ()yea so lovingly at him when she proposed. " Oh, yea," said she, " that la all right." Well, we got everything arranged be- fore we went home that night, and ceuld hardly wait to wee how it would work. Firat, let me deecribe "Old Blank." In the first place, he le not old, but a fine-looking man of about 35 years; but his quiet, dignified manners, and the fact of his being unmarried gave him the title of "Old Black," his real name being Mr. Levi Black, and the owner of one of the fmeet farms in the town of L— where he lived alone with an old housekeeper. The next day Cobweb Bent him an in- vitation to the ball, which he promptly accepted, and Cobweb wan in high glee. The wished for night at length arrvied, and we were all on tip -toe, you may well believe. Cobweb went early; ehe drove up to thedoor about 7: 30, and, running np the steps, rang the bell. The old hotteekeeper came to the door and looked as though she thonght Cobweb was crszy when ehe asked for Mr. Black, but she managed to ask her to walk in and she would tell her master she wanted to see him. "But what ander the sun that chit of a thing wants of Mr. Black I don't see," she muttered, as she went out. Cobweb sat down and waited with all patience. Soon the housekeeper came back, saying Mr. Black would in ready presently. Cobweb waited an hour, and he did not come; then another hour, and= Mr. Black. She was about to ring for some one to find out what the trouble was when in he came, all smiler, saying : "Have I been long? I have hurried so I am all nerved up " - "Oh, no 1" said Cohiveb, "you have been no time at all 1 Well, we will go now, if you are ready; but it seems hard- ly poesible, you have been so very quick 1" " Oh, yea; I am quite ready.' "Well, now we win go." She waited on him into the buggy and tucked the robes around him as sober as a judge and gathered up the reins and they where soon at the ball. Oh, how honored Cobweb looked as she came In with Mr. Black hanging en her arm.. She gave us a look out of those eyes of her's that set us all into a laugh. Bat all the while he was ad sober as could be ; yet I saw a twinkle in his eyes' that riteant mischief. Well, all went merry as could be. When supper -time came Cobweb gave us the wink to be on hand, as agreed. We all swallowed our supper as soon as poseible and Went and hid in a closet that opened out into the ladies' dressing - room, where Cobweb meant to entice him after supper, and then propose to him in the moat approved atyle, as she said. We could but just keep still. We got all arranged. around the door, which stood partly open. Soon we saw them come in. Cobweb led him to a seat, and, seating herself beside him, she looked over to our hid- ing -place and made up a face. That set us all to giggling, and Sep laughed out; but he took no notice of it, so we thought it was all right. "Dear Mr. Black," said Cobweb, moving up to him, "I have long waited for this of opportunity to open my heart to you, but never until now found one favorable to my purpose." He looked rtp, a little surprised, but did nob seem much frightened. "1 have long loved you, and know you to be the the guiding star of my Ex. istence. Say, now, truly, dear, darling Levi, don't you love xne I Den% say no," said the, dropping on one knee--." don't leave me withont hope. Give me some encouragement, and I will be the happi- eat woman alive! Say, darling, do you love me a little 7" And she looked up in his face With such a complete counterfeit of devotion we were all convidaed with laughter. He loOked at her a moment, and then went off in mesh a fit of laughter as you never heard. Cobweb :straightened up with all the dignity oho could command, and looked nt Min with a face as long as your arm, midi he Mopped laughing, when he look- ed tip and said: "Well, you dM that well; better than I Coal, Miss Reed. I am glad yeti did Ito, for 1 could never have the outrage to pop the Omni= ; but Mew yeti have done the thing -I can only say ; I shall only be too htppy to except your heart and band, I do love ort;pbave for a long While, 1 oinerheerd roar conversa. PERSONAL. T)3EE. FAIMEI Swampy Lots. -Not BO Bad as They Look, When and can be drained, and yet is left year after year, to grow sedges and swamp geese, there ought to be a good reason for it, or elite it ehowe negligent farming. I have just such a lot- three sores or more in extent, iest tehx ho ear% d 1 In al t s gnu,. along eg roonde 1 ads rey, he ue ruen ed the cows go to find a dry epot to lie upon. A tall willow hedge fences It on a pert if one side, and there is a brook end many :Triage of never failing water in it. Here the bog- graes is gretn earlier than anywhere else, and my Jersey °owe get enough of it to col- or their butter a month or two earlier than they otherwise would. In fact, as soon as the green shows, be it in March or February, they have a chance at it, and we get golden butter from that time on, there 18 not muoh nutriment in the grass, cr whatever the vegetation is -I think sedge or ore ex is the name for it- but it contains chlorophyl all the same, which, though green in the plant is yellow in the butter. It does not take many days of mild. weather to start the tussocks sprouting, by day, and the peepers piping by night, all over the swamp, and very boon the cows will need very little, if any other f &len I do not think there is as much butter in these sedges, even though tender, iniceulent and abundant, as there is in poor upland pasture. Still, the butter comers abundantly, audit has not only good color, but a fresh grassy flay in The warm weather comes on, and the sedge becomes tough and vsb y. The cows gnaw the upland grasses, which grow on the few patehee of hard ground, down to the roots, so after the grass starts well on the upland, the cows of mune " go to grass," and leave the sedge to grow. Well, it does grow, and after the hay orop is all in, we mow this, and it gives me a big stack of sev- eral tons of at least good bedoing. Young stock will eat a good part of it, and cows and horses nibble at it. It is rich in ash constituents, and goes a great ways toward making a big manure pile. If I were to "reclaim" the meadowe, I should hardly know what to do, It would change my whole system -no yellow butter in Maroh, and very little in April. I would have to raise more rye for straw, get less and not so valuable manure, and net have such an easy time with my hat log. No doubt the mead- ow would yield splendid timothy and or- chard grass, and there would be more mon- ey in it, but now, as for a good many years past, I am not quite resell to give up the only :swamp meedow I have left. The daughter of the millionaire of the uture will probably be a billion heiress. The late Marehal Serrano of Spain dur- ing hisepolitical career saw eighty-four changes of Ministry in that country, for- ty rebellions, and twelve changes in the head of the State. Mies Nellie Hobson, of Piralfingford, Conn., has been offered a situation to teacli oil painting in a college in North- ern India at a salary of $4,000 a year, but it is not MUM Hobson's choice to go. Mr. G. M. Crawford, for thirty,four years Pads correspondent of the London News, has jam died after seven weeks' auffering from blood poisoning, superin- duced by the Ming of a weep un the car- otid artery. Mme. Sembrich, the prima donna, has presented her leige lord with a son in Dresden. Mme, Nilsson, who is also in Dteaden, as Boon as she heard of the birth Irremediably offered to become god- mother for the boy. Mr. G. W. Duff Assheton Smith, the English politician, lives in a little world of his own, a park surrounded by a wall eight miles long and fifteen feet high. Day and night the gates are closely bar- red. None of his neighbors have any idereef what is going on within the wall, save occasionally they hear that he has purchased another elephant, or that his pet bear is dead, or that he has taken out his five thousandth dog license. new Pretender has turned up In Paris. He is a young man of intellig- ence, who claims to be the Prince Imper- ial. His story is that he was not Jailed in Zalnland, but captured by the Zains, from whom he soon after escaped. He says that he walked clear acroes Africa to the Mediterranean and creased to Mar. seines. He resembles the late alleged Prince slightly and has been kindly cared for by the police. Caricusly enough, Frederick J. Stim- son, better known as "J. S. of Dale," doeernot regard the writieg of" stories as his business in life. " Gaerndale," "Mrs. Knolbys," " The' Crime of Henry Vane," and other tales that have made his repu- tation, are the outcome of hours of lei- sure and amusement. Since in 1878 he was graduated from Harvard,. he has studied and practiced law assiduouely. Daring the last five years he has been at work on a laer book, which Is eeow,in the hands of the publisher. The title Is "t American Statute Law." , • Representative Romeis of Ohio, whose seat,Frank Hurd 18 contesting, is a Ger- man. The New York Tribune says: He began bueiness a cabin boy on a Lake Erie steamer. Then he got to be porter, and finally became a baggage -master on the' Wabash. Read. Dalin last years' campalgn'a Democratic speaker fulminat- ing against him said: " hle's nothing but a baggage -smasher." Romehe friends took up the cry and elected him on the strength of it, just as Rawan was elected Sheriff in Philadelphia this year on the cry "nothing but a paper -hanger." Just aS Bad. The Boston Transcript tells a atory about two men who thought that women as conversers were far behind men In the choice of topics. The story recalls the lime from Hudibraa : " Compound for sine they are inclined to, By damning those they hove no mind to." "What things women are 1" exclaimed Brown. "My wife and another woman sae a whole half-hour talking aboub how to narrow off a Mocking, and from the in- tereat they took he the discussion, one would think the ealvation of the race de- penoed on IL" "I know it," replied White. "I've heard a °Duple of women disease for half o day over the best way to pin a tidy on a chair -back." Then Brown and White spent the re- mainder of the evening in a very betel, lectual conversation over the reepective merits of Curve and atraight pitching as dpplied to the national game. Each ev, menially gat as mad as a Much hare, and have not spoken to each other since. There may be nothing wrong about taking tea qtaletly, but Mr. Andemon of First avenue, Neve Yerk, doesn't think so, Burglars took 1$1,000 worth Of tea frota his tea store ab night. He hopes the burglars and hot the tea will get into ho water. M. Lookroy, the Realm' leader, le one of the gayest and wittiest men in Paris. WISDOM'S WOBDS, The more you say, the less people reinaena- bet.. ' Sinaplicity of character la the natural. re. suit el profound thoughte. The plant of happiness comet thrive With- out the air of cheerfulness. The innocence of the intention abates nothing of the mischief of the example, lnfake friends with your creditors, if you eat, but never make a oredltor cf your friend, The harvest gathered in the fielda of the past is to be brought Immo for the um of the present. Many people mistake stubl orness for bravery, meson:tem for economy, and vilenees for wit. Deprive the people of the means of pro- per subsistence and you enslave and des- troy the netion. Cheerfulness is an excellent wearing qual- ity. It has been called the bright weather of the heart. We should be ae cheerful of our words as of our actions, *rid as tar from eyeaking ill as from doing 111. Gold and silver would be better as mere medals of oommerce than as fluctuating le- gal tenders in the hands of speculators. For a gold currency the people aro being encouraged to notifies their goods, their liberties, their children and themselves. Give 110 quarter to those vices which are of thine inward family, and having a root in temper plead a right and propriety in thee. To avenge one's self is to confess that one has been wounded; but it is not the part of a noble mind to be wounded by an injury. Who is vi ire? He that learns from every one. Who is powerful? He that governs his passione. Who is rich? He that Is content. Those that would be safe have need to be suspicious of the tempter. The garrison that surrounds a party is not far from being surrendered. He who expresses in his conduct justice and charity accomplishes the most beautiful works; the good man is, in bis way, the greatest of all artists. Public opinion is a weak tyrant compared with our own private opinion; what a man thinks of himself, that it is which determines or rather indicates, his fate. It does us good to admire what is good and beautiful; brit it does us infinitely more good to love it. We grow like what we ad- mire, but we become one with what we love. Tee foundation of good labor in any sphere is a good man, and all that is done to give breadth, depth and fullness to him will react in nitimete improvement upon his work. Timely Suggestions. We find the following plan floating among our exchanges : Have a strap in halter long enough to pats through ring in post or manger and each to the hind feet when the horse stands as naturally tied. Fasten a strap around the ankle of one hind toot, pass the halter -strap through the ring, between the fore legs, and featen to the strap around ankle • pass a euroingle around the horse to ho:d up the strap. Let him pull; he will sit down like si dog, only to get up the worst beat hone you ever saw. A few at- tempts will break the most inveterate halter -breaker. Probably poets and timbers out now will not prove as durable as if out at midsum- mer. Such is said to be the experience of those who have tried cutting at both sea- sons but few want to epend time then to out fence -posts, and it is well to save out all such as are suitable for that purpoee when cutting fuel. Bean poles and pea -brush may also be saved out now, which will save time in getting them at planting time. There is great economy in feeding corn- stalks which have firat been cut into as short pieces as posaible. If the stalks are cut before frost injures them, cattle will devour warly the entire stalk. An acre ot etalks thus managed will keep a cow three months, but it will pay to add some corn -meal, es- pecially if the cow is giving milk for butter. If milk only is desired, bran made into a slop with W141M water is better than corn- meal, which is likely to fatten rather than increase the milk yield. The Homestead finds no trouble in mak- ing a hog fence of wire. Use 'six wires, and poste about a rod apart. Use hog wire for the lower stranda, and pull the lower wire quite close to the gourd, and the `second four inches above the first. They are cheaper than boarda and in every way better. Most of the farming that din be done in winter is in the barnyard. Before cold weather it should be covered two or more feet deep with straw, which will be trampled down waile the gronnd"is soft, and will help to save the droppitige of stock from waste. Successive layer. of , straw may be added at times, especially if there is stook enough to make a due , proportion of manure. , Live Stook Rotes. Janna.ry Is a critical month with all kinds of live stook. They should be kepG com- fortable and gaining. If they begin to fall off in condition, they will be almost sure to lose rapidly, and will require more food and better care to keep them up, than if well housed, and continuously well fed. Be sys- tematic and regular, then they will not stand and worry for food or water'and will take time to feed, to ruminate, and to rest. Look after shede and stablea, 'to keep them clean and warm. Water ought not to freeze in cow or horse stables, on the coldest nights, and at the same time the ventilation should be such, that the air is always sweet. Piga suffer greatly with the oold, and should have dry, well -littered nestle always. Lit- ter them with straw or swamp hay, enough so that they oan cover themeelves out of sight in it. Sheep should have dry sheds ; they bear a great deal of cold, but sheuld not have wet nor dirty astraw to lie in. Where much straw is to be thrown into their eheds, provide a few movab'e platforms, like old barn doors, for them to stand upon. They will be a great comfort to them, and they are easily turned ever when fresh straw is thrown in, or they get dirty, Fowls will ley if they have warm houses, are well fed, and have a chances to exerolee. The free range of the male sheds, theep elied' t and the barnyards:, gives uettally sufficientex- ordia.. If debarred from there, ;hey innat have sheltered rune and bare ground. Ducks need to be well fed, but not a/leveed to get too fat if they are to begin laying limey. Too much corn is always bad, except for fattening poultry, as it produces internal fat, stops laying, and makes the fowls lazy. No exercise, no eggs. The Florida sponge fisherman have just oornmenced the season's bit:sine:3a. The an. nual yield is about 350,000 pounds. The late M. Perrin of the Comedie Fran- cais when a young man was betrothed to a remarkably beautiful young wenian. She fell ill with amallpon and was disfigured for life. The first person to visit her whon she was allowed to ambled any ohe wee M. Perrin. 44 Ah 1" maid she, with a istaile, "you have come to be set free from your engagement." "I have cense," eaicl he, "to hasten the day of ottr marriage I" Jite(ie Peop'e often we der what would be the reeulte of a greet p. eel battle at the present time. Would 'iiieny shits be deetroyed? Would the lose otlife be rent? Let ns try to detoribe shortly 4 few of the probable features of a fight between two fleets of modern honolade. Although two beadle fleets might approach one another in Dome taotical forznatien, this could not be ad - bored to for any length off time, and the battle WOUld 20011 become a series of inde- pendent duels between individual fillips. This is at once apparent when we consider that most, if uot ail, of the ships would have rams, and it would therefore be highly necessary for a oaptein to have perfect con- trol over the movements of his ship, to pre- vent her beieg rammed by an enemy. At the outset of the action the torpedo boats would probably take a very aotive part, and until exterminated, which they certainly would be in time, would engage great attention, and be effective in einhing a few ships. It may be eaeily concluded that every ship would be steaming fast during the action, this being neoeseary to avoid beirg rammed, to get into favorable posi- tiona for discharging torpedoes, and to elude the iire of an enemy. Heavy gun fire would of course be maintained from the commence- ment, of the Action, and those ships engines got disabled from this (wage would speedily be rammed; and at this point we consider the great lees of life would take place, for the ettarion that the boats of a ship, being always exposed to meohine.gun fire, would at an early stage of the :taloa be riddled and shattered with allot, and in the incredibly short time in which a ship sinks after being rammed it would be impossible for the crew to improviee other means to save themselves from drowning. NAteps seem yet to have been taken by our .Admin alty with a view of ptoviding for this con- tingency. It has been suggested that a hospital ship bearing the Geneva cross should accompany a fleet into the action to receive the wounded. We would make a further euggeetion-narnely, that thie ship should be provided with fast steaming boats, peculiarly marked to show their pacific na- ture, which would proceed to the assistance of the crew of a sinking ship; by this meane numbers of the men might be eaved who would otherwise certainly be drowned. It is not probable that the lose of life from gun fire would be large, as a great part of the crew of an ironclad would be under water, the rest being inside the armored portions of the ship. Give the Boys a Chance. Frank and trustworthy boys carry their honesty on their faces, and when such are needed for services, or desire any favor, an intelligent person is not only excusable for putting faith in them but may confer a great eamouragernent and benefit by doing so. A gentleman of wealth and high official posi- tion says: . Somewhat more than fifty years ago I was appointed midshipman in the navy and sent to New York. I was only 14 years old, and being of a delicate make and email stature, did not look more than 11. My previous life had been epent in the country, and I knew nothing of city ways oribusiness proceedings. Payday was the 30th of the month, but I wanted some money on the 20th, and passing through Wall street I went in a brokers office and eaid : "You lend money here, do you net ?" "Yea." "I want to borrow $20 for ten days," I said, I did not then understand the quizzical manner with' which the broker looked at me before replying: " You shall have it and I won't charge you any interest for it either," He gave me the money and I signed the receipt; and I need not add, the twenty dol- lars were promptly returned at the expire - tion of ten days. I am sorry that I have forgot the name Of the broker. I mentioned the ineident many years afterward to a gen- tleman who said it was the most extraor- dinary story he had very heard of a Wall street broker, of all men. Another case happened In Washington about fifteen years ago. I was standing on the porch of Willard's Hotel, when a little boy with a bright, honest face said to me: Please, sir, lend me twenty-five cents to set me up in businees. I want to buy some newspapers to sell." I replied : " My boy, Itiaven't got twenty-five cents, but her are fifty centre and when you want to return it you will find me tat this hotel." "Thank you," Bahl the little lad, "1 will bring it back." I never expected to' see him or the money again, and considered it a donation; but in the evening as I was walking up an down, in the entrance hall, my ooat was pulled by a little newsboy, and I turned and beheld the youngster wno had applied for a loan in the morning, with the same bright face that had attracted me then. "Well, my -little man, what Is it ?" I mid, as though I didn't know him. "I have .brought back your fifty cents, sir," said he, "and. I am ever so much obliged to t ou. I have made more than a dollar clear profit with your meney." A Swindler's Sharp Trick. A French nobleman played a game ea ecarte with a foreign Count. The latter won and the Froroehman pulled out 10,000 frame and handed them to tho winner, who quiet- ly secured them in his pocketbook and went home. Early next morning a gentleman of aristocratic bearing and decorated with the order of the Legion d'Honneur was shown into the apartment of the foreign Count who Was still aeltep. "Monsieur,' he mid in tones trembling with excitement " you hold in 'yeur bands' the honor of a whole family." "Indeed 1" "Kindly tell me, was it you who played with M. de EL?" "Yes." "You won 10,000 francs and he raid you." "Vet, in bank notes, and I have them here." "Web, sir, the notes are -false,- Imes night we hoard of the nefarious; practleee of our, and I came' int beaven's matte to oak ' you to exchangeettheni 'for ten cams I have brotight." The noble foteigfter at once ex- ohanged"the notes, In the evening he was not a little surprised to meet his epponent at the °lobo and to be asked to give revenge. The foreiguer curtly refuted, which led to an expleuation. The Count drew from hie pocket the exchanged notes: he heel reeeived In the motning,,, They were false. The gen. Marian with the decorations was a notorious Prow+ swindler, A Kansati man "points with pride" to the foot that .he wife has wore one bohnet fer tweuty-five •yeare. The feeling with which the Wife points to the husband has not been describe& AI Parliament at Dublin. It looks now very much as if Home Rule, on a solid foundation, and within retie bounds, had been promised to Ireland by Mr, Gladstone and the Liberal party; and in response to the preposition Mr. Parnell'e ohief organ has shouted, "God Save Glad- stone." We have not heard yet, specifical- ly, what the details of the new plan are; but we presume that the same measure of home government will be accorded to Ire- land 08 18 given to a province under the Con- federation. Such a concession, it seems to us, could not be much of :a menacel to the empire, or to the tights of the Protestant minority; for all such questions as Inland Revenue, Customs, Militia and Defence, Justice. etc., would still be in the hands of the British Parliament, wherein would set aepreeentatives from Ireland, just as we send our delegates to the House of Com- mons, Meanwhile, the most intense excite- ment prevails over Ireland respecting the intelligencethat Mr, Gladstone "has at lad yielded to the out -throat rebels of the Em- pire." There aro rumors of civil war, and of riots and burninge, and some of the moat enlightened of the newspapers Boman] like fish -w yes whose reason has departed. If Mr. Gladstone's echeme comprehends for Ireland nothing more than a Dominion province has under our unioe, there is noth- ing wh atever tofear ; and we do not be- lieve that it does. Some of the newspapers declare that such an act would overthrow the Conetitution ; but suppose it does over- throw it? We are the master of the Consti- tution, and the Conetitution ie our servant. But it seems to us thee there is more jubi- lation in Ireland over the promise of a par- liament at Dublin, than there will be in the enjoyment of the same, Inthe first place the -Emerald Lie will look upon the appointment of a Lieutenant -Governor by the Imperial Government as aninterference ; and they will grow disgusted with the meaaure of national honor that has been conferred upon them when they find that under the new order the higher class of public men will go not to the legielature et Dublin, but to the alien par- liament at Westminster. 8gORT AND CRISP. BetelAniON ABROAD. Ponsionbn--Edueation I don't tell me I Amerioa is far behind Europe, Why,air look at Frame°, for instance. Bagley --Well, what of France ? Ponoeby-Well, sir, even the little dren them can speak French, A FIGIUND IN NEED, De Guy -Don't say auything Mudge. Re'ie a friend of mine, b deed. Bolgertop-Then he ought to b in need. Da Guy -I should say he WAS. meet him but he strikes me for e dr. WUY TOY AGBEED. Mrs. Breeze -1 cien eo sorry, Delia , hear that you have rind trouble with ye husband. Mtn. Geeze-You ed, Amelia; merely a You know married agree. Mr.teali'teeze- Can't t. ey ? Well, ways agree. In fact lamake it a poi see that we do agree ; or rather that Joh ogrees with me, which amounts to the same thing. Scarcity of' Servant Girls. The agricultural returns to the Ontario Bureau of Industries are just published for the month of November in a pamphlet oft fifty pages, and very instructive res ding it is. The great difficulty which the farmers of Ontario have to endure is the scarcity of servant girlie The wages of hired men have fallen from $20 to $17 per month, while girls' wages have risen fifty per cent.; but young women are ecarcely to be hired atal). " Girls for housework are hard to be got at any price, says Mr. C. H. Kit- chen of Townsend; "it would be a good idea to import good girlie" " Plenty of girle to marry, says George Buskin of Artemeeia, " but not to work in farm bonne at milking cowe." " Domeetio servants are very scarce," writes Tnomas Loyd Jones of Burford, " which is a great drawback to our wives, who are nothing better than white slaves. What with raising a family and doing the drudgery of a farm house, this state of thinga will have a Most damag- ing effect on the rising generation." The ease in North Grimsby is still mo,e interest- ing. According to Mr. J. W. Van Duzer, " servant girls are scarce, and those we have are getting to be good organ players." So in Wbitchurch, according to Mr, M. Jones, " there is a lack of domestic servants. The agent convinces a family that an organ its the only thing to'afford uninterrupted hap- piness, ad when a girl can play 'Old Grimes is Dead' she is no long,.r a comestic servant." At HaldiMend, es we are told by George Kennedy, " the girlie have tell got ebova hiring; vso canrot get them for love or motley " At, Yoege elan, according to Mr. Thomas Moulton, " girls for ser vats aro arearce, but for wives they are plenty." The belief that agricultural dullnees Eegland has been greatly exaggerated for party purpoaes fincle support hi the fact thet an official return from the 13ankruptcy Court shows that in the past fourteen years, out of a total of 1,175 bankrupts in Eaat Kent, only 59 were farmers and dairymen, while under the act of 1888 only fear faem- ere in East Kent heve filled petitiotte in tile Bankruptay Coutt. Yet the fattetere howl piteottsly for a duty on A:nark:at importe, which will not be imposed, hoed they never so loudly. The misery of Bladed is nearly manifest in high life aa iti the rags and filth of extreme proverty, ve been mieinform ittle disagreement, ' cannot alwaye ,wttse ,j • we al - ‘t to BE GREW FAT ON WATER. " Bromley, here's an acoount of a Geer - gin woman who lived forty-eight days on water," "That's nothing, Derringer. My father has been living on water for the last ten years." " You expect me to believe that, eh? hy can't you add that he grew fat en it 1" "Well, he did. He's a sea captain." INCTJ RABLR. Scene -Pavement in front of Muldeoly'e saloon. Time -Sunday morning. Foliar min 498 -Good morning, Mrs, Mc- Carty. Mrs. McCarty (with the family allow- ance of beer under her ,apron) -The top o' the morning to you, Sir. Policeman 498 (noticing the protriber- ance)-It's not well you're looking. Pwhat is it ? Tumor ? Mrs. McCarty (shyly) -No. Can, sir. MAXIMS FOR MTMORAITTS. True bravery is shown by performing without witnesses what one might be oap- able of doing before all the world. He that talks big and arrogantly of him- self, is univereally condemned as a trouble- some and ill-bred companion. Beware of careleesness ; no fortune wil stand it long. You are on the high road to ruin the moment you think yourself rich enough to be careless. Affectation in any part of our carriage is lightieg up a candle to our defect, and never faile to make us be taken notice of, either as wantingte seta- wanting sincerity. The man who ne failed in business can not possibly kno whether he has any "grit" in him, or is worth a button. It hi the man who fails, then rises, who ia really great in his way. There is nothing with which men are eo liberal as advice. le may benefit or blight a life, or save or ruin a man. Good advice is better than gold. It should be given with wisdom and received with caution. Every man is a debtor to his business., from which as men o, of course, seek to receive countenan an profit, so ought they of duty to e 8 or themselves, by way of amends, to a help and ornament thereunto. Character is a fabric., Every faculty is a spinner, spinning every day its threads, and , almost every day threads of a different cola; and character is made up by the weaving, -el rw together of all these inntemerable threada I h of daily life, The generality of mankind create to them101 - selves a thousand needless anxieties by vaixi th( search after things that never, nor never 1 the will be found upon earth. Let us be con- n etc tented with our lot, and endeaver to make it as happy as ev-mcan. T� a 08 pi Pc sir ad an reo A Specimen Spiritualist. ed of r A noted spiritualist of New York visited,' Pc't Montreal some time ago, and before leaving'„a 8' had several conferences with some of the. "ct` leading dead of that City. His acquaintance. „ ewei ship in the other world extends back to tuherui, gentlemen who lived at the time of the I'm" deluge; and he has been enlightening somew of the penple in the United States, as we',' th,t' perceive by a New York paper, upon cer-r °, 11 tain S3riptural problems. He is perfeatly ' boar well acquainted, he says, with Jonah, whom , add he describes as a persen of wavering tharae: I Ad' ter, though "extremely sociable r and he er declares that "the gentleman never was ailai wallowed by a whale." The Scriptures are ing true be maintains, but "the incident with pref respect to my friend Jonah was this : He, ' .or18, was fleeing away from certain people, an, nig God put in his way a ship whose name was - Past The Whale. Into that vessel my friend went; ped and after the days mentioned in Holy Writ, ' two he was delivered from the ship, which Wad keei oast upon dry land." The New York papers seem. to delight in his irreverence; and a,' of r large number of persons accept the new yen, "Ch tion of Jonah, and ask all mrtnner of ques- a thou tion a respectivg his personal appearance ardnena The spin tealiat, however, is allowing lite ney mind to wender aye y from sacred thinga, and he spends: his ale, at latest accounts, , orun ravingaboutof onoutabof eau ' Egyptian Princesse mu e odaughter reartabs, who, he, peel decleres, reciprocate in affection. Twon four obstacles are in the v thy of his marrying the ; veri; Eastern beauty with the large, dusky eyesin of ay namely, he has a wife in New York, and he- This has not the advantage of being dead. He' Sten playa for hie release from life hourly, and meet the only cloud that etch& upon the exquieite wee horizon of the other world is the dread thee, when his wife followa, she may Heck to eeperate him from hie beautiful bride, with her lotus bads'and her divine tioara.bei. He wae 8d/A with an illness loot wok, whiclg ho bolteved veould be fatal, and as ,heelay uipeanhisc:07ofdelight, h, vielltfhrt,igid ever, he repeated nn Goat Elbasthmcloim YI:rg'EsoTlife•lodbYhlogd :fast-' bis ileesftag,tlaoarrnO1 dn oyuet visionvvlspeechlets woe upon ew, pa rs nbereeekse ntriupPpbdy,batelike gly vole° of his wife, "You're dbrunk agin you into th0 "vaiity deeps, ' end the spiritualist Sat up and ilooked in Arabi Pasha is in failing health. The climate of Ceylon does nob agree 'with him. It is recalled that Senator Shermaft Was the stemma person -next after exTreal- dent Arbletir-to shake hands: with Mr. Cle-veland after hip inaoguration 08 Prod' dent, spore 01011 then nutn Is all all tl the, of ti then b oili hour drab to in dash, not t Sprit appl the pada nioul In a houn attril that Mous