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The Exeter Times, 1880-7-29, Page 3jL'29180 teeter- • (H11iai.1 EY ON,LAW XJOS. •112r. Greeley,' says Partridge, 'dile is 1r. DAti slow a eremite attorney.' Gree- ley uttered If, short grout of rr•(lognition; 'lid 1 4 i • f 1 around. i till. em bet ll �t even n l0 1* ar I, u harassed, shrunk a,:ny to cue tinnier and Welt a chrttr, Re went on amend the* room, leoi,iue at pictures, mid whatnot, and in etbout five nunutee, when his back wn;i turned ou rn't ,ted t thonght he had forgott.au me, he sud- deuly, without looking at tun, said : 'flem 1 so yon'ro an attorney, are you?' I confessed it. 'I bete lawyers 1' he exclaimed etrtpha'ioaliy, 1. hate law- yers ; they du tem..., mischief than their heads are worth 1' 'T enppose they are a necessary evil,' I sagge,ited iiuons:vainly. 'Wholly Iln.neteeteary,' he insisted, 'I suppoeti t - et .sill acknowledge,' I laid, "that, '',i: •ti• re:enures e•aul order atfrl.reinove hitt';: it,•':,rtte to g .od guy errmente.' 'Jnnt the eOlttrary 1 jn 2 the erns. trary r' he squeaked, itt hie ukl fai-etto; 'they 03twci ,lrsordet, wet they are the chief otrstecie't to good govortnnont.' I thought the man wee crazy. 'Perhaapn yon will tell me,' .I sugeeoed, 'how debts ;t;ett,i be collected without lawyers ?' 'Don't Isernt ''tel oollecretl I don't want 'eta ertile,'''.lrl,' tilt scpv,ttked ;. 'lt A lots li he ve his property tvith''Itt payment, .r dee'r seed why a. D. E. F. and all the rteoi of the alphabet shriek be called np•+n , police officers to get it back 1 No debt shell(' be collected, by law! Lt's mlrri?rne r Let a man trust another rnrtn at his own risk. Even a gambler pays his (tnbts that he feel le• ,golly obliged to pay, and Fair thein debts of honor, but men will pub their property ont of their hands to prevent the legal collection of their grocery ao count. Abolish all law for collection of debt, and that would abolish roost 01 your lawyers.' 'DEE'D BUT DROUT'IIY.' A. young mon was so thoroughly Rd Elided to the horde that Ms friends despaired of his refermaiion. Desi i- ons of breaking hurl off the evil habit, they formed a plan whieh they be- lieved wnnld tend to conquer the' rul- ing passion i' Accordingly when all the arrangnmentn were toady, Sandy was made perfectly drunk. A cefiin and rlear%lothes were hired, into which he was placed, and then carried into a room with closed shutters. One of the party also in dead clothes was stati,m- td iu an adjoining, closet. At length Sandy awoke, and sitting np in tile enfliti, exclaimed, 'Where ata I?' Upon this ont walked the other arul exclaim- ed, 'Yon're deo'd, roan.' "sIoty Thug hae I been dee'd ?"A fortnight,' Llano 1 .tiff hae yen been dens! ?' ' A. month.' 'Weel ye ken thie pl.ree better than I dee. just gang and get ne twa bottles o ale l' The eequel may bo guessed. HUMOROUS. The world is alwrtys iutereeted to know the least words. of a► man. It (inesre't care so molt about those of a woman. She has had her last word all through life, 'Gnrdnese 1' said a Parisian, when the bill for the expenses of his wife's funeral—a little niIl of 6,000 france— was handed to him, 'I'd almost rather shA lied not died.' The spots on Jupiter don't trenble same young erten half as much as the spots on their last summer trop ters. A man has invented a chair that can he adjusted to 8,000 different positions. It is designed for a boy to sit in when having his hair cut, A printer's girl fell exhausted into Ilia arms at a ball. It wt,s a feint, to work in en em .brace. ,�. JOHNNY'S ESSAY ON ..t)OGS. Last summer our dog Toweer wan a layin' in the sun trine to sleep, but the flies was that bad that he ouldn't, cos he had to catch 'em, and bime by a bee lit on ,his head, and was working about lilts that dog was hisn. Tawser he held his head still, and when the bee was close to his nose, Towler winked .at him like he sed you see what this buf- fer is doin' he thinks I'm a lily -of -the valley which isn't opened yet, but you just wait till I blossom and you will see some fun, and sure enuf Towsor opened his month very slow so as not to fritten the bee and the bee went in- to Towser'e mouth.. Then Toweer he shet his eyes, and his mouth too, and bad begun to make a peaceful smile Even the bee string him, and you never see a lilly•of-the•valtey sick so in your life. HOT AND OOLD. A STORY THAT illi. WM, PATTERSON DOES NOT TEI,h. Among the railway traveliern eating (Pinner at e.hetet in 13ollevills the other day was a fellow who swallowed meat, petatnes and bread ae if he had hoed ti A second cop of coffee was brought to hien and in his hurry ho picked it up anti took a large swallow. It was con- eiderably hotter than pepper, and in Itis exetiermeitt he opened hie mouth ( 0 stud idiot the liquid for ss. the table agai'Ft a young titian's shirt bosom. Gosh—whoop--hot-,-beg pardon—. Blazes 1 lie exclaimed, reaching for the water. 'Yeti are a bog, • sir 1' replied the yonug man, 'a regular hog..' 'T am, ell ?' ''IRs , sir.' 'Ann I've got hiistles T' `Yes yon have.' •And I grunt 9' 'Stranger,' said the reran, as he reached across the table after another slapjttck, estranger, I'm not a hog— I'm only an lit. P. bound for ©t. taw a.' PROSPECTS OF THE EUROPEAN HARVEST. Perla, Jnly 15.— The Eoho Agrioole a+r-Mirle•rrr that the harvest prospeote in the north will be tolerable. The wt/:;ther ie r'minently promising. There ere rind pror:pects in the central din• eriot,i, hitt scarcely up to the mark in he: wast tair,l east, and well its to the tverege in the. south -weed and the dis- t,ric.te ari.uud Paris. The quality in general is decidedly superior to last season.. There are also good prospects of crops of potatoes., beets, and hops. The hay crop is not successful,. bat there is every chance of a gond after- math, Fruit trees ensi vineyards do not share the imps ovod aspect, except- ing the olive,whictr promises a good Field. Lt Holland there is an excell- ent crop of rye. In Germany rye, maize, and potatoes retiitiro mare sun. 'Pile hay crop is very bad, end the only thing that looks well is wheat. Aus- tria suffers much from the wet weather. In Hungary barley, wheat, and rye are very promirring. Oats and maize are considerably above the average. The Italian harvest is superior both in quantity and finality. Russia is com- plaining loudly of deficiency, partly owing to the presence of myriads of insects. HINTS. In Texas they make cider from to- m: toes and sell it at $1.25 a gallon. Energy will do anything that can be done in the world ; and no talents, no 'circumstances, no opportunities, w111 make a man without it, Tea leaves used for keeping clown the dust when sweeping carpets are apt to stain light colors ; salt is the best in tho winter and new mown hay in sum- mer. Straw matting may be cleaned with a large coarse cloth dipped iu salt and water and then wiped dry. !the salt prevents the straw from turning yellow. s- a Life being short, and the genet hours of it few, we ought to waste none of them in reading vainr•iess books ; and t • L valuable books should in a civilized country be within the reach of every One. A Book.—Except a living than there is nothing more wonderfnllthan a hook; a message to us from the dead—from human souls we never saw, who lived, perhaps, thousands of miles away. And yet these, in those little sheets of All kinds or printing clone neatly cheaply and with dispatch pager, speak to us, arouse us,torrify us, Order your work where you. can get it done the cheapest. teach us, open their , hearts to us as brothers. THE " MMES C . c S. G•II?TiEy'i 'Undertaker -4 and Irilrniture Manufac;tu.rers WOULD SAY TO those who intend. nurohasu.,t bo ,lo ao ftalvt the tuauufatture 'iho dealer who buys to sett again moat noeessarrlr have a profit, We steno to givetlle Purohasers the benefit, which oauuet tail to meat the v'iewa of tire Grangers, Our expenses aro loss than those of cite manu'aztnrerso0nsegnent we can eelloheapez. 5 WE W O U.LD 1' oalispeeialattention to our undertaking depart +1 7'x^ rneut,which is more corn- r*t ,i pletetitanever, asw hive 1 tri, set several now designs ,.,:4'..W+,!,t of late The Bost cofiina,, oaskots sru•ouds,and every uneral requisite at the lnwestprices. Our now! T•Ioar. e i s pronounced by i competent judges to be second to no a in ,the pro vluces 1 GENTLEMEN, N, F.. E. H ATC H, Emblems of all the Different Societies. JUST RECEIVEE'D AT THE EXETER GROCERY AND LIQUOR STORE, A LAitGE. STOCK OF GREEN, JAPAN, YOUNG HYSON and BLAOTi TEAS,. RAISINS, CURRANTS, PRUNES, DRIED APPLE CANED FRRUIT, SARDINES, LOBSTERS, SALMON, BITTER S.r4VICE AND PICKLES, Dl1.ANDII S, GINS, WMPlS AN1) SfltUPS, RTE, MALT SCOTCH, HUSH AND COMMON WHISKIES, TOBACCOS AND CIGARS, Wholesale and Retai'l.+ • T., MACE Main Street,Exeter. Drai THE CANADA COMPANY'S ed : ado for waled In orator to meet the present depression, the Canada Company offer for sale or lease, on easy terms and in certain eases AT REDUCED PRICES, All their Lz,,tisre-claimed orbenefit toil bythe "Lake Burwell Drainag'+ Works,' in the Township of Ifosauquet, Stephen andMoGillivray,in the Counties o Lanrbtou, liar on and Middlesex respee- ivalyy Lists ofr,ands may he obtained, and plans of the Lots may be cern, on application to Mr. John Specimen, Exeter, !err. Gongo W, Holwell, of the " Holwell House," \vidiler Station, G. T. Railway, or to 2.lr. John Ironside, of Grand Bona. For Lists, Prices, Tereus or other informs tion, apply to the Uommisaiou era, ttanatla Co:upeny, Toronto. U. W. ALLAN, H. M. ) 0I'tr'A:TT, Conant •siunore. (Jammu,. Company's offices, May' 20, i8d0. Zrtt 'THE— -� 7;7 71 1 7 74 E j1 '4441/1444.4144 BECAME SOUND AND WELI.a. NATOIlER'S STATION, GA. }t. V. PIERCE, M. D.: DEAD SIR.—My wife, who had been ill for over two years, and had tried many other medicines, became sound and well by using your Favorite Pres- cription. My niece was also cored by its use, after several physicians had failed to do her any good. Yours truly, THOMAS J. Maeleviee. BEST OF ALL. BALTIMORE, bid„ March 5th, 1879. DR. R. V. PIERCE : Dear Sir.—My family have used your favorite Proscription and it has done all that is claimed for it. It is the best of all preparationa for woman complaints. I reooinmend it to all families. G. S. WATI;RMAN, Druggist. 4441.44.4.4.44 The remedy that has had the most remarkable success in the cure of (liar! rho's,, dysentery, cholera morbns, and, indeed, every kind of summer omit Plaint, brought on by eating unproper food, snob raw vegitakles, unripe or sour fruits, bad milk, impure water, etc.,—the remedy that is the most pleasant, rapid, reliable, 0,17(1 effectual is Dr. Fowler's Extract of Wild Straw; berry. It is the finest remedy for sum: Ener e.nrnpinihts known. For sale by tett ,{,aiders, Cool r'ed Work a Specialty t The TEVIESOFFICE has excellent facilities for turning out CARD S,. BILL HEADS, POSTERS, OTT, TTL ARS, ----1S 0P,FE .iUNO•--- GREA T BA RGl41 /N8i «L1 A R D V F/ R .1,._I Do not fair to call andiseo his Large stcek be- fore you buy elsewhere AMEBIC AN CUT NAILS Cheap for Cash at the Sxgrr. of the a.& Loo] ,. Saniwell t4 l'ickard's Bloelcifain St., Exeter. HO ! FOR MANITOBA, During thetetuaidder or the seasair of 1640, GREENNT SVA Y'S Manitoba Parties t will leave on The FiRST TUESDAY of Every Month. Next partyon 4th May. For particulars apply to JNO. K iOX. G.W.1t,Aoent, Centralia LEGAL R. H. CADDY, BARRISTER & ATTORNEY AtLaw, Solicitor, ,8c. Office, FanROn's Block. Exeter. MEDICAL. P. HUTCkIINSON, Member of the College ofPhyaieians and iurgennat:f Ontario, &c., &c., Office next door 80I. Carlings Main Street Exeter �R. HYNDIIIAN.—CORONER FOR the County of Huron. Gf ce,neat,loorto alr.I. 0arling's store,Exeter li•'. B.LtOWN IN G M. D., C. M.. est o P. S, Graduate \'ictoriat'n?rersity• Office andresidence. i)on :nits Iatborattnv. Exeter, MOORE. M. D. 0.• 31. . Graduate of McGillruivenity,2:ontrcel Othee and residence ,l;xd±tor,Out, Office I Wan-- F ars—N to 10 a. m and 7 to 10n. m R. J. A. ROLLI.NS, M. C. 1?. S. 1Lf 0 , Vwtoria St. Cre,litnlr, Out, Office hour's ram 0 to le o. m.; 2toep.m. I LU•TZ, M. D., "._J. Office at his residence, V.seter. lRti. Il't `INC7,iz11ADI'ATii, tJtiI- J VP•.1:SITT Trinity Coll egelien•1•grCnllega t'11P9iciana and surgeon; On;,.. .")lf:co, IC'rktnr:. NEW 13 U Tell ER SHOP the undeorfe nett wnrtl(ii+tits fire it hs:t+i• tante ofEx>_terand vicinit, th t hE liar OPENED A NEW IUTCIIE-IR SHOP pie tsar south of hianlletta1. ?tl+vhnt':,114hort' thedslue. liberal patronagetliut has beau au cor,ieilto hirtrti.tite 11311.t: tt otrvrr AVD WAGO)t, 1tfirrx(1 Line willbesxt*ndedtehirn Wills new branch 1, to,' a; His moat willcall at the rest lents of tb, villakethreethe eseacl.week atil ..F17, M T a.11 kinds kept constant' n nand at iris liutchershop. alaolralnithin 'unci wagon rrtt:kingearried as nano, in all its branat•e 1i. DAVIS. Just Re,.�.`c :ive CHOICE ELMS, BREAKFAST BACON, AND LARD, FRESH MAPLE SUGAR, ORANGES & LEMONS, —AT THE Choice Family Grocery R. FOWLER,' XT. k/V Strawberry A Specific -Remedy for all Smrnrner 'Complaints such as Diarrho)a, I?y- sentry, Canada Cholez a, Choler Morbus, Cholera Infantum, Som. Stomach, Griping Pains, and all derangements of the bowels, caus- ed by using improper food, such as -• r1 raw vetetebles, unripe or sour '"s t fruit, bad milk, itnpnre water or change of water, changes of the seasons, exposure. No matter from what cause or in that form you are h°O� subject to any of the above com- plaints, .Ln. Bowfin's IhxraAar er WILD S'raiw8RRRz will relieve you, and a speedy cure will be effected cg without injury to the system. It is manufactured from the Wild Strawberry Plant, and free *from opium and other injurious drugs.' �✓.L For eaio by all dealers, at 1s. 100. .to or $1.00 IIIMPARED NY MILl3URN, Bb;NTLEY , .Pri;c01'