The Exeter Times, 1880-2-5, Page 81~I. 1B ' a, ) TUE TT ES
t,.
'1'Id E ,I X13', bliN tOiet 41AN.
The C iiioago Tribune tells the fol-
lowing story of a visit tried° by a light-
tting rod roan to an old farther in Wes-
;
tliottglit I saw yotl around here a
near or two age, selling another variety
That's all the difference there is.The 'It wouldn't bo a pan at all,
earth as Huxley ,Ieays, is a great re- 'would be a Pail.'
servoir elmel full of electricity which 'Then a can be a pail 2'
'4Vhy, no.`
is constantly seeking affiliation with 'But you justeaid so. wee there
the oxygen and` rrnetbeglin of the at hole in this pan ?'
tuosl.liere. Your ligbtnipg-roc is pro 'Yes, a little oi,o.'
bably the only one in the Northwestern `In the bottouu ur tnpf
Of course there witsu t any hole in
States that is not wound up ; cense- the top,'
xif theta condiments,' observed the old gttaatly the surging currents of eleo- 'Then ]tow could anything be pour -
agriculturist ; 'and you eau that these Welty which have been meandering ed into the pan 2'
eiglltuieg rolls were frauds ?' all over the country striving to find an 'Oh, I forget. The top is all a
hole '
'Oh,osr ttlat was wl.eti I was in itis tiittlet, after vainly trying ovary other 'Anil the bottom 2'
bonds of situ turd the grill of bitterness,' tigkttnine-rod, are accumulating be. 'Is an pan.'
Fnid the agent, conttitely; 'bet •I've heath your hone°, and oorrnseating 'That will do. You see, gentlemen
been cotivertod since. I after shudder Fend
a
ciilatiiig millating all along the of the jury, the witness has no idea of
new a Ave %then I think if my foot surface of your lightning. Wait till
Wits"to stip wlu:t] 1 was putting up of e it Rely dart; and you'll see a pale, lamb.
4f the itiferiar sunrise which I wi a ant flatus pltu' ng ail along the surface. S
then paneling of upon a credulous and The first touch of a thunder storm you 1
unprotected notrmuiiity, l neighs have have up here that spectacle. of awful
gone plumb down to perdition with a!grandeur presented by yam- lightning -
lie ou my lips and a hammer in my
mind, Now Tam endeavoring to atone
for the evil which I committed by ex-
posing the inferior quality of the liglit-
atiug-rods I then put up and replacing
them with those for which I ant ncW G0011 -bye ; I must •Pt ont of here for I
agent at cost price-' owe it to my family to pre.terve my life.
The old farmer said ho didn't exact- If vnnr da'12bter siurvives don't you
til know that l e wanted to put up nt y worry abort the future. I'll make pro -
lightning -rods, but the agent slid to per provision for her, because I will be
him; 'ril tell you what 1'11 do. I'll put $.i00,000 in my nudist to he able to
spa set of liehtning rods for you. at d point to liras the sole survivor of a
if you don't like them I'll make you, a: man '\vhnse house was knocked into
present of them.' I brick dust and thatch splints because
The farmer's eyes sparkled at the pro.1 he woald'n't take my advice about the
position; the Agent went to work, and
w hen the had completed his task 1 e
slapped the farmer on the hack and
asked Bien if he liked the material of
the rods and the workmanship.;
The farmer sui,1 he didn't. favor to sek you not to begin till I ant
'All richt 1' said the agent pleasant- over the hili and nut of sight. With
)v; "then the rods are yours. and I that+ lightning -rod instinct with ne-
gative electricity, as it is, it is sere
deal h ifor any uninsulated than to ap-
proneh it.'
'Hi; held en I' said ilie unfortunate
farmer ;I'll !rive you :5 to wind up the
thine for me.'
'Five dollars 1' said the neent, with n
withering sneer; 'why the fact thnt
Your house wag burst into twenty l,tin-
slred tltmtaan,t million pieces '11 be
north nbnttt $50,000 to the cemnanv
es en awful example. Mang there 2'
'Hold up,' yelled the egricntturiet;
'will von wind nn them lir;htning•rods
if 1 rev vmn for them ?'
'Well, I don't know that I should.'
replied the Agent; 'yen ane, you eatd
they weren't finite recording to vonr
taste. and it dneen't seem exactly richt
to hit tutting, a mail's money for 0. thine•
that be isn't quite satisfied with. Be-
rod'I1 knock anything ever seen sinoe
the combustion of Sodom and Gonior.
rah. By the way there's dark bine
cloud coming no yonder. 1 guess we'
re going to have a thunder storm.
arrangements of iii? lightning -rods.
I'll get an axe and crowbar and tear
the dam thing down,' said the farmer,
after a moment's irresolute pause.
'All right; only I want as a special
don't charge you a cent. Onr company
always sticks to its words, and would
rattier lose a million dollars than do a
job teat wasn't satisfactory to the cus-
tomers.'
Ti`e farmer asked the lightning -rod
mill to come in and have some dinner,
end the li•.'litning•rod man said he
didn't mind. There seemed to bit
eopetl'iug funny an the lightning rod
ruin's mind, for he would look at the,
farmer every minute or two and laugh
at himeelf gently, and when asked
what was wrong say 'Oh nothing, no-
thing.' and then choke with inward
mirth. Alt through the meal he enter-
tained his hosts with interesting re-
miniscences of lionses that bad been
stri.iok by lightning—how in one case
everything mete]ie within the building
was fused, and a fnc•e.imile of it cern
paign supplement was indelibly in]• sides it ie taking thousands and than?•
printed upon the woman of the house, anlls of dollars ont of the cempany'e
while her beautiful daughter was driv. pocket, because what we want ie an
.en through a stovepipehnle. "leaving
great strips of her soft white flush on
the ragged edges of the sheet -iron.
,When he Wats climbing into his wagon,
the fit of mirth with which lie was
seized 50 nearly approached the Pro
portions of an apoplectic seizure that
the honest farmer got alarmed and.
asked him what in the name of Cher.
les Foster he was laughing at.
'I was Laughing—ha, hal Iie, he !
hi, hit Ito, ho !' —panted the merry
agent, 'to think that you think you've
got ahead of me.'
-.Got ahead of you ?—well, I did get
ahead of you,' said the farmer; 'I got
them lightning -rods for nothing.'
'Yea,' gasped the,agent,in paroxysms
of mirth; 'but go and look at these
li htuing-rods and see if they aro
wouud up—ho 1 ho 1'
'Well, and suppose they ain'twound
up; what difference does it make 2
'What difference does it !flake ?'
echoed the agent in well feigned :Aston-
ishment. 'Shade of S. F. 13. Morse,
here is anum that doesn't know' the
difference between positive and nega-
tive electricity I .lust go up to the
berme, and if you have Wheatstone's
Pragrrtatie Analytical 8vnopsts of I if-
ferontiated Bllectrieity--the edition of
1.876 is the beet -overhaul the ole*en-
t'b chapter, and you'll see what th dif-
ference ie.'
'I hevn't got the book,' Paid to far -
met; 'what is the difference any ay ?'
'The difference is that it lightni+ig rod
properly wound conducts poeititie elec.
trloitp from the reloads to the\earth;
when not wound up it conducts negative
eleetricity from the earth to the cloutle.
a four -quart pan at all,' and the' jury,
having been awakened by the Sheriff,
nod off again in acquiescence.
The kidneys are subject to a variety
of dangerous and painful diseases, aris-
ing from various causea, By the Judi•
cions use of Victoria Bache: and Uva
Urei these affections ni.ay be cured.
Bright's disease, diabetes, and all fe-
male complaints aro successfully com-
bated by this popular remedy, which is
for Kate by all dealers. Price, $1 per
bottle.
The Price of Wheat.
The value of Wheat in the Canadian
Market is controlled to 1► great extent
by the foreign demand. If crops are
ehort in Russia, Franco and 'India,
England mut buy mere Cenaiiian
Wheat, and the price consequently ad
winces.
But the price of 'Wilson's Compound
syrup of Wild Cherry never ehanees.
A twenty flee cent bottle will cure ,any
ordinary Cough or Cnid and give mark-
ed relief in old standing cases of Bron-
chitis. In hundreds of cases 50 Dent
bottles have cured Coughs and Colds,
which heve been proof against all other
remedies, and the proprietors positively
claim that a $1 bottle will insure a
large family against any danger from
Croup, Whooping Cough, Brochitis.
Cst.terh, Loss of Voice, Coughs and
Chins, and all kindred diseasees, for a
w}uole sen son.
This is no empty boast, but A fact I
Willett has already been proven by
t' nusande of Canadian familes to their
entire satisfaction.
It
JUST ltl 'C 11V10 A ' TflA
EXETER GROCERY
AND LIQUOR [STORE,
A LARGE STOCK OF
GREEN, JAPAN,
YOUNG HYSON
and BLACI TEAS,
1IAISINSPRUNES DIt1ED APPLES,
CANED FRUIT,
SA.RDIN s' S;
LOBSTERS,
SALMON,
FITTER SAUCE AND PICKLES, BRANDIES, GINS, WINES AND SYRUPS, RVI;, MAI.TI
SCOTCH, IRISH AND COMMON WHISKIES, TOBACCOS AND CIGARS,
Wholesale and Retail.
rir— A, MA Cr
14fain Street,Exeter.
THE NATIONAL POLICY
Having triumphed at the polis,
ISAAC CARLING
is prepared to give all his oustomers toe becofits'that will accrue from its adoption, and bas on
hand alarge stook of
t3EttlYIAJISYRUP."
No other medicine in the world' was eyor
given such a test of its curative qualities as
Bosarnn 's GnnaA& Signe. • In throe years two
millions four, hundred th•,usand small bottles
of this metlicino were distributed free of charge
by druggists in this country to those afiloted
with Consumption, Asthma. Croup, severe
Coughs, Pneuumot:ia, and other di.enses of
the throat and lunge, giving the American
people undeniable proof that GEaMAN' SYRUP
will cure them. The result bas been that
drugcists in every town atat Tillage in the Ca-
nadas and United States are recommending it
to their customers. Go to your druggist and
ask what they know about it. Sample bottles,
11.1 cents. Regular sire, 75 cents. Vire.) dose
will relieve any casP.
UP WIL'hL
itvfnl example to scare other fellows 1THE
bite tnkinrr our reds jest tie we put
'em np. However, seeing it's von, anis
as I don't want to have •von► bieed on
my hands. I don't mind doing it. Mind
ever the $90 and I'll fix it.'
The farmer prndticed the money,
and the agent gave hint n receipt; then
takingia monkey wrench he approach.
ed the lightning -rod rnd gave 'it n
couple of twists, placed liis ear close to
it, irit it again, and then returned joy-
fully to the farmer. 'It's all right now,'
he said; 'it has been wound np and is
now prepared to conduct positive elec•
tricity in large or small gnantities from
the atmosphere to ` the enrth at the
shortest notice. But if Ihad,been halt
an hnnr longer I shonll have been tan
late, for already the lightning rod was
beginning to bulge and throb, and scale
off in pieces with the fiery element con•
fined within it.`
COURT SCENE.
Counsel--'IYJN large shnttld you nay
this pan, of winch you speak, was `2'
Witness -'A four•quuart pan, I sbotild
say.'
'What do you mean by it four -quart
pan 2'
'A pan that holds four gttarts:
'Wine or beer measure ?'
'Wine, no; beer, I guess it's beer ; I
won't be certain.'
'.13utyou think it's beer. What is
the shape of a four -quart pan 2'
'Bound.'
'Like a ball ?'
'No ; like a barrel.'
'Round like a barrel. Yes. Well,
is a four.gtiart pan tall or short 2'
'It doesn't make any dili"erenee.'
pan is fnur inches across the
bottom Mid twelve inches hill 2'
TIMES
t* —�
PARTIES INTI.NDING
TO, PURCHASE
()HUANS
SHOULD CALL AT
'IiT"T'O?S
and Examine his Stock.
the Best that are Made
DOMINION ORGAN CO.'S.
MILLINERY
Dry Goods, Groceries, Wines • will
Liquors, Crockery, Etc.,
At his Store, Main Street, Exeter, which will be sold a
Which will be sold at prices unheard of under Free Trade.
The farmers of the surrounding country will find it to their ad-
vantage to sell their produce without paying market
fees, on the -]i.a ter market,whieh is second
to none in the west, and then
Call at the store of the subscriber and
Secure Immense
sur.
argains
here to be Iiad in Overooating, roll -cloths, Broad -cloth
Doe skins, Silks, Winceys, Delaines, and everything
ncecied in' the Dry Goods line. The Grocery
Department very Complete. An inspection invited.
Nn troul)le to show goods. ISAAC CA.RLING
GO TO JAMES ?PICKARD'S.
AT
MISS GABLICKIS
A. full lino .,ow in, of
FALL and WLt'TElt. Hate,' and Beitnetst
all the lstost,st, les.
New Flowers Feathers,and, Ornatn,ents.
Trimmings in groat variety.. .
GIRL'S I-IA.Tte NICELY TRIM11ME1),
from $1.40 up. Everything will be toll as cheap
es possible.
Faney Goods, Rollin 'Wool, 9totteun, eta., a tui
took always kept..
jackets Ina to of out
MISS GARLICK,
Sop Alain l t.,151toter,
The UNI ERSAL SUSPENDER.
SOME REASONS why these Suspenders
are better than others
1st.—No Elastic required.
2nd.—Is Slack when stooping.
3rd.—It never slips off the Shoulders. ,
4th.—Sold at prices of common suspender,.
Try a fair and Secure Comfort.
Manufactured by C. E. RAMAGE,
982 Adelaide St. Went, Toronto.
and don't miss the chance.
nst Received— .
3rd Lot of those Cheap Mink Bette,
3rd Lot of Robes, Hudson Bny prices,
Dress Goods and Winceys—dirt cheap,
Blankets and Etoffes at job prices,.
Grey, Scarlet and Fancy Flannets—mill prices,
For variety and Latest Styles, don't fail to see
ur MILLINERY.
Cloths and Tweeds, never better selected, esid
ie best cutter in the county.
OVERCOATS
Cur assortment and price unequalled.
BOOTS AND SHOES
Bought before the big edviince, and onr customers
get the advantage net only of selecting from the
largest Stook in town, but
AT OLD PRICES.
Our object is to buy and sell at Bottom Prices,
and by the way people are flocking around we
thick we are doing it.
COME ANI) SEE.
,TAMES 'PICKARD
SPECIAL NOTICE!
.0:
SAMWELL & PICKARD
Are now offering at OLD PRICES a complete assortment of I'JRY GOOCS, including
Mantles, and Mantle Cloths in Great Variety
Dress Goods in all shades and colors.
'yTNC./+,.Y"S CHEAPER TITAN EVER ` BEFORE OFFERED
BLACK LUS'pRES direct from theivauuacturer.
FLANNELS ck BLANKETS very low.
READY-MADE CLOTHING CHEAP.
CLOTH le FUR CAPS ALL STYLES.
c
,MILLINERY IN LATEST STYLES..
ORDERED CLOTHING A SPECIALTY.,
Also full lines of BOOTS et SHOES, HATS St CAPS.
et FRESH GROCERIES.
We have also a special offering of LADIES' 11fINIi
SETS dt CAi'S
Be sttre to pall arid gee them
1 lot of BUFFALO ROUES at specie, prices.
All the above goods will be offered al
the very lowest ,heiress,
SA1fWI;LL.0 PIM
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