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The Exeter Times, 1878-3-14, Page 6as THE TIMhien 14, 1878 ‘STORA1 THF FOR. . returned, missionary thinks that the sol - :tire of Christ should be employed in storrning instead of holding the fort, and the following Ai a substitute for "Holding the Fort?' He says, "%f 1 read jesui! sigesile aright, these are tintes :for lurking behind stone -walls, but for storming thena. Tim fort is not ours to. hold, but the Volta 14: 30; 12: 31; 13: 11.) Ifoldiug forts is his wors. Ho, my comrades!! see the signal Jesus waves en, high, Satan's battlements are frowning, Hear our Captain's.eay.. Onoses.—Stortar the fort—,7 am with yeu, 1 will show you hew.; Shout the answer back to beeven— We are ready new! So the lofty walls defy us, Held. by Satan's vower ; Where our brethren Ile in prison, Row'A thestoreriog hour. enesuar--Storna the tort, etc. Lo, the prepheas have foretold. us Haw the foefreustfall ; There is no such turd as failure, Shout my comrades alit Caonue.—Sterni the fort, etti. Fierce and loug has beea the conflict, But the end is near; Ounsral shoat our great Comniaader, Checer, ray el:miracles, cheer Guo.—Storra the fort, etc, reling so bitterly with each other, that last week au undertaker starved to death, and greet destitetion and Beer• ing in that industry is feared. , Troy man died recently while Say ing his prayers, but the (shames for frequent fatalties of this kind are not sufficiently numerous to create a panic in Central New York. Little boy .isr lease, I want the doctor to come mat see mother," Servant "Dootor'a out. Where do you come from.?" Little boy: "What! Don't you know me Why, we deal with you. We had a baby from here last week." Bill Shute was a member of the 26th. While the boys crowded around the old flag at a recent reunion, Bill, with an irrepressible humor, called. out: "Boys, I am no speaker, but there's a blamed sight more of you than I ever saw in a fight." )1. book agent, soliciting a subscrip- tion fin a book, showed, the prospectus to a man, who, after reading "$1 in boevds, and $1.24 in sheep," declined subscribing, as ite might not have boards or sheep on bend when called 'en for psyment. We have done Selena awful mean ehingi in our dife, hat we never were mean enough to hurt the leelinge of three women walking abreast on the ifetrossing. by stepping off in the mud. Ther'a something lumen left 'about ue if we are in the newapaper bamitess. FUNNY PARAGRAPHS. Troubles and twine TIMM ooze ale - Chicago stale setoffalse teeth, war - anted to bite of an antr at one anp, for, here, and being / may never come itere $8. agin, and Smile I wane to see all 1 kin,, The physicians eeythetppretaisenots lhie to know it it would pay a fellow spreads disease. Ileart troubles to go to Ore Kuavery Yard? opecially, - Yon metal the Navy Yard, remarked Ajax defying the lightning met e, et hve the officer. been an impressive epectenle,—thueb 7015 I suppose tis the Navy Yard„ *ore so than three jaeke defying a full 'Is there nauch there to en? A DISGUSTED MAN, •1••••••••••• "Behr" I'm here," he said to as pot, iceman nrtbapQst0MCe-'bO'Fc RANDOLPH AND THE LANDLORD. I THE W. WO -LOG -TAN neerre arum Aland. It is asserted of a Philadelphian that 4re died -"warn out by too severe mental effort in the study of how to live with- out work" man who has just had to rig his wife up in a hundred -dollar seal skin cloak, chews it lbtI to the ripe of the olimate. Dealwere paper says ef a man whose cow aka: 'Mr. Jones has the sympathy of the entire communiey riu this his dark lour. Glass slippers have been introduced in Venice. But the y woe't &emirs popu- lar here until the last art of darning atookings is revived. A sign on a Rochester street ceads, cer, -"Joseph Lmborn." We de not wish Does a balloon go up? to deny the assertion, but we elk:cot to Guess not. the grammar of R. Well, what in thunder...3o they do ? The era of the lion and the lamb has' demauded the irritated man. What ,00me ixi Bulgaria. The Turks and Bus- does a feller go over therefor, anyway? sians lain each other, and the cones- Don't you know what a navy yard pondents -do thelyin' u? asked the cfficer. There are two things whioli double 'Yes, I know what a knavery yard is pap a man with startling rapidity—the es well as you do. I've seen thousands misery of an uneasyconscience and the rupaid interest ou a pronaisory note. They say the Indian name of au edi- tor is, "Wo-rack•ta-che-resh bela- haw," That's what we slweys thought it was. It means "Ikea and hungry" place where they build and repair gov- TOBA.000 syrouR probably - ernment ships, stare cannons, supplies, 1 Tobaccoes, and Cigars, An English exchange says there will sze. be enough chalk taken ons d the Clan- It is eh ? slowly inquired the stran- 1 Pipes in nel tunnel to make Englsna independ• Ant of cow's milk for winterise. At they Washington fire, thieves watched au opportunity to steal Patent ;Office Reports.. This shows how hard the times are. Yes a good s Do you suppose they'll hang any one, there to -day? The Navy Yard ie not a place where they hang folks, laughed the officer. Sol I thought it was. Well, what's the performance, anyhow? There is no performance 4f any -ort. There halal? Dou't any ono ualk the rope 2 No. Nor performany backsumer-springs 2 No. Well, it must de a dum queer knav- ery yard I exclaimed the stranger. Perhaps they've got a grizzly b'ar over there Never heard of one, replied the offi- John Randolph was travelling in a part of Virginia with whioh he was un- aerpainterl. In the meantime he stop. pea during the night at an inn at the forks of the read. The um -keeper was a fine old gentlemara Knowing who his distinguished pest was, he endeala eal to draw him into oonversation, but failed in all his efforts. But in the morning, when Mr. Randolph was•I ready to start, he ceded for his hill. which, on ibeing presented, was paid, The landlord, still anxious to have some conversation with him, begaa as fol- lows: 4 4 W1i0h way -11,Te you tiavellieg, Mr.. Randelph " "Sir " said Mr. Randolph, with a look of displeasure, "I asked," said the landlord, "which way you were travelling:" "Have I paid my WI r" Yea. De I owe you anything unfelt ? No. Well, am going jut, where please do you understand'? The landlord by this time had got somewhat excited, and Mr. Randolph drove off. But to the llandlorda3 our - prise, the servant retirrned to inquire which of the forks of ale 'read to !take. Randolph not being out of bearime dis. tauee, the landlord epoke 4tthe top of his voice Mr. Randolph, you don't ewe me a' sett; just take which road you pleats° 1 A. %or TO err liar OP BOBBOWEall.---, A gentlemen whose piece of buelneos isBErtnizkoxiaind miles from the Mercli- ant'a Eachanee, Boston, is annoyed, as many bo nese ceteu are,byimpeounioue individuale ileeirirea small loans. He hie adapted the following method of deaWeg with them : He will Helen amicably to the long preface to the request to "just eeud me five dollars for a few dap?' a,nd on. ewer, 4coertainly," and thou, tarning to a clerk, he We: "James, we liege five dollars to land, have we not?" -"Ter, sir," says well-trained Tunes. "Well, lend of to Mr. Beet." is not in., air; loaned it to Mr. Bummer day before youterday." "Ali, yea; so I did. Well, when ie cornea in, lend it to Mr. Beet;" and,. nowing to the borrower, the mecbant resumes hie ibusineee, and the netdy une walks dejectedly out to try a more profitable place. The Ship Grocery -WATCH floiNes --130;20*- nesare.,16% got, sue w. D.eleG eehlotweteb helve() buying. yea l have ao ether afer §036, luethem. An who wear them recommend then, Geld and Silver.Laciles and Gentlemen'ieet. 77 Dundee atreet,Lendou. See the testimonials The largest. bestand cheapest %croak of flue Qom Jewelry. Cloake,(trer, And Mooed Wore, FRACtt AQ0451, ke n for Provence, Itopelign,v every oleaarretio tr. W. D. or143 17 DUndess Loudeu ILLI N RIC MISS GARLICK, has now on band a fell atm* of tat and what° Minatory. uoiniiivn.watbe IMPOt 119V81e' in fiEerite Bonnets, Featheas, Flowers, Sites, Velevls.Ribbons, .&o., Fit lower priee3 thau ever. .••••••••••••• FANCY GOADS Berlin Weds, Ottoman and Mipper Perform. Jacketo luide *rent to order. Fel* Weals' safer Mautleesind Jackets, at MSS GARLICK'S, ?dein $t, Exeter IMP'10R 'CANT FARMERS! If you require good, eervicetible anpleinents,get Collards Flexible Iran Harrows, Cultivatoro tied ireo combined horse heels. These implentente are *stew:ray used line hove given and etetinue to give gcmeral satisfaction. For rheugth, careieuey and dueablility they eramot be surpassed. The Iferrews can bo made to cut Any width of Oroue and of any else of iron required. 5fnuy ollect to them becalm they are too heavy. This they este not to do lea STAIDOW menufacturIng harrows atilt - able for any aoil, from 1t5 lbs. in weight and less Up t en,v weight they may wank The harrow teeth Ti all Steal pointed, Circulars sent free on np- plication. Agents wented. GEO. OILL1ES, MAW onetime-. Oananoeue, Outerio. TEAS, SUGAR, SY1tUPS, CANDIED PEEL SAGO, TAPIOCO, NEW FRUIT, FRYS, CA.RRA.08,COCOA, of 'em, an I expect to see thousands ChecllateI Prepared Corn and more. I don't care two -cents about the leadin.• Groceries seeing this one, though if they are allt. and. New. I fresh going to play the Black Clrook, or have any fun, I'll take a look in. This navy yard, said the officer, is a T'ne "Lady slipper" is Ike names of at vessel just launched at Boston. She must be intended for tt whaling vessel. Niue men out of ten, when you run against them in tile dark, will say, hel- lo 1 The other will titter the the fant. syllable and leave you to ,eomplete the word. Nothing unreserres the arers,ge small boy so muela as to be oblige& to steal cookies out of z crock. To Uric stained .tense the jarring of tha ewer sounds like the crack el doom. Several exclianps ars giving direo• $ions "I-Eow to Dress." The most sen- sible way is to stay in bed till the fire is started, and then take yetir eiothee :and go out to ties dining-roons stove. Why should ale spilit of rnortd be prand ? has stood pretty well the welt. and tear of a comtairtstat's emperiance, but a tougher orae is silty slimed a bar- ber eat ong.ons Wflail a boy, a etiow-shovel, and a; drifted sidewalk onto tugether, the bright lexicon of youth contairs the word "Fail" printed on the title' page in letters large emits& for a minstrel show poster. "0, for sone neet•feeillefil name by which to call him 1 0, for some name no other lips could give 1"- was the prayer of Vielet Pane, magi she mar- ried him. Now she is content to call him Old Beeswax. Th. doors in Iedinnapells are quer- ger. Well, it meet be a one,horse af-, fair. I don't suppose I could. even get any beer over there. I guess not. Well, I won't go, said the stranger,' in a determine& voice. I guess Itt knock aroend and see if I oan't run across a good dog fight. RJR. PEN AND HIS COW. Meerschain, Wood and Clay. SMOKERS REQUISITES. Cigars and Tobbacco, Whole- sale. CEO. ICEMP. NE W PUMP FACTORY Mr. Pen went out to milk his cow, At Woodhan the other day. Now, if there is one thing Mr. Pen prides himself arm it is perfect command of eow. With his pail nu the gt onnd, he 'milks with both hands. and sings meanwhile, oc- casionally bestowing a word of s7surniang )(in the ,eow if she does not stand still. On this occasion he had nearly finished, and was singing cheerily: "My son] (so nowO be on thy gnard.1 (What in Egyptian sand -bills ails this ,cow)? "Ten thousand (thunder and borax stand still) foes arise." A.nd as Mr. Pen raised himself up from the barn floor, and wiped the milk out of his ears and nose, he saw up in the loft the wife of his bosom ivi‘h a long switch in tier band, with which she had been tickling the gentle ani- mal's nose, and. .416 said, in an awful voice : A‘Oliver Pen, I reckon you'll wrap yeur old tobseco boa in nay handke r - chief again, neat Sunday, won't yet and have me take it to chuck and sling it out on the floor—hey!" When he singe now,Mr. Pen singe very softly indeed, ankeeps an eye on the left. ABRAY & EDWARD base, at con- ._sideralle expense secured the Beet ma- cibeen and Augur in the Dominkm, anithave on hand a large stock of First -Class Puinlis and are prepared to make to order on Vito *short- est notice Well or Cistern Pumps. Wells and Cisterns contracted for. Also on hand a targe swami Seasoned Lumber. Soft Elm Lumberfor 361,50 te 17. Rock Elm from th 8 to 88.10. Oak, 58 80 en. lrioor.ng, 512. Good stock of Logs on hand orereduage parpos e s, cut according to o.der $6.50per 1,0(1. All orders by mail attended to. MILTON !GOLD JEWELRY NEW FOR 50 CENTSwe Baud to any a' - dress ,,eiagant Gents Watch Ohain Muir Sleeve Buttons, set tielit,ati. AR, 1 Oellar Button., heavy plain ring, 1 Pariede a dia. mond pin. Retail prim ell. 5100, 000 ,tock 113114 t be sold. Illustrated catalogue of jewelry, watches, &e.sent with eveey lot. Silver watch, to .11 agents We:Wafts°. Mt neTli 14 AL NOVELTY CO. MONTREAL 7.10. ate. ••••••••••••••.•••••• COU, COLD OR SORE THROAT REWIRES IMMEDIATE ATTENTIOL A continuanterbr implengthof time causes Irritation of the Lungs, or some chronic, Throat affection. Veglect oftentimes re - suite in seine Wearable Lung dhiease. BROWN'S BRONCWIALTROCHES have proved their elacacy, by a test of *any year*, and will almost invariably rive immediate relief. Obtain only BROWN% 1111 ONCHIAL 'TROCHES, and do not take any of the worthieee Imitations that may be offered. Said everywhere. Work For All In their own 1oea1ttk, canvassing for the Fire- side 'Visitor, 'enlarged) Weekly and Mont.hly— Larg at paper in the world, with Mammoth Chromes free. Adclres P 0 VICKERY, Augusto Maine. FOOT cfc BEOE SIWP IN CREDITON. Next Door to Carroll's Hotel. Parties wantitg first-elees work will find it to their advantage to call before leaving their orders elsewhere. Only first-class material used. Sowed work a speciality. Repairing promptly attended to. CHRISTOPHER RAU. Crediton, March 7, 1878. ly 4OEXTMA FINE MIXED CSAIDeL with name 10 eta., post-paid. L. JONES .20o. -assail, N.Y PIANOSBe'inice, 5900 only 3260. Par- lor Organs, price 534eoe 395. Pa- per free. DANIEL F.Razarer, Walli- ngton, N.y:. oatalocineof Magic Tricks and Novelties 30 Es' Bead it. Quemes Bazar, Block at. Stoneham, Mase. $44g $66 58 evee. ekeatiPrit & Outfit. 17ert?„ 250 Irctreeetl.R.FStRunMaranBrttyairt:E2,1M: 25R.F1t1:3;viethrtrr ligiciLal'itte)sainau reat'd 2.1:3! sau, N. Y. SAYE TY IN STOCK OPERATIONS $amm, Realized in six days from time teeNe' option on L. Short, Deeemlor 4, nillitGIN and PRIVILEGE $550 Vtirn:ere Sditf(8) N $100 by a 0.0 on Hansa cpac. Nevem- ber 26, New System of Assured Profits. 5412,50 returns it 3 hours on Dol & Leak., nee. 1. 3100 buys 100 shares, 50 buys 50 shares, 25 buys 25 snares. No further liabilities or risk of loss. Pull detailegiven freely by letter and stock re. ports. Gold and i 'T. Potter Wright & co , streck brokers f No. 95 Wall st,.New York. 25 of our best cards, with name, no two alike,10c U. S. JONES le Co-, A shland, Mese. NEW and Elegant cards, with like..ess and name, Samples,3 cer ts. Also 25 curds, repo, damask &c. 10 c, Nov( I ty earn co., Eassau, N. Y. nONSIIMPT1ON CAN BE OURED ! Try PUL Na MONA. Ask your Druggist for it. AISSOLU PION OF PARTNER - I." ellIP.—The partnership heretofore exist- ing between the uudersigne as merchants at (ireditoe, under the style and fi.m of Greenway Zwiker, lis this clay dissolved by mutual con - mit. THOS. GBEENWAY. WITNESS : C. ZWIKIlli. THEODORE SWITZ18E. Creditost, 4th February, 167e. .Referring to the above, the undersigned will carry on the busimos in the same premises, mid collect all aceouuts and pay all claims against the C. Z MEER. late firm. AGENTS WANTED FOR. CREATIVE- SCIENCE en, MANHOOD, WOMANHOOD, AND THEIR MUTUAL INTER -RELATIONS ; LOVE, ITS LAWS, POWER, ETC. Agents are Belling from 15 to 25 copies &day. Send for specimen 1.ages and e xtra terms to agents, and see why it sells faster thou any other book. NATIONAL PUB, Q0. MAIN Pa. Cd P2-4 c--) cd w ricJ cia ci) cid 41tc4 E <3.) r—i -rr;li riS ta) rat: ce F.144 P.4 Pid-1 F-4 CL) 493 rii•‘...4 r41 rr$ cd ta) t=1 cip g :171-4 pe4 rocl F-4 cp CD • r4 • r-1 ci2 co rzt Fri <i) r/2 ci.) 4-4 • r•.1 cC:43 g:1 rn • P.1 C einclD 05 4-4 rid Pi4 t •