The Huron Expositor, 1996-03-20, Page 5Grocery line moves at snail's pace
As a keen observer of senior
citizens and the proud son of
one ("No," it's Bill, Mom.
Weggie is the cat's name.) ...
I believe this group of people
could benefit from a few
helpful tips.
Drawing up a short list of
helpful hints for seniors came
to me recently when I spent
two days behind a very sweet
elderly lady at the "eight
items or less" checkout
counter at my local A & P.
Please, it's absolutely
unnecessary to read every
headline on the tabloid rack
out loud and followup with a
personal editorial of,your
own. Everybody agrees
they're all a hunch of freaks
but really, four "tch tch tch
tchs" for each headline is suf-
ficient.
If I've learned one thing in
allthe years I've been doing
grocery shopping it's that
when you show up at the
checkout counter with items
you have removed from their
shelves ... they're going to
expect payment for those
items. Oh yeah,- you can
count on it.
That's why being presented
with an itemized receipt
should come as no shock to
you. That's why you may
want to start breaking into
that portable vault you affec-
tionately refer to as a purse,
well in advance. Say some-
where around the fresh pro-
duce. section.
So the first tip is: grocery
shopping requires payment
and lettuce -can wilt -and die in
the time it takes you to pro-
duce legal tender at the cash
register.
This brings me to another
curious habit older women
practise ... spending hours
rummaging through purses
and never actually finding
anything. You must remem-
ber that purses with multiple
compartments, snaps. zippers
and button-down latches
were designed by a sick indi-
vidual who hated his mother.
In the time it takes you to
Open the purse, locate the
correct pouch, unzip it, locate
the wallet. open it. locate the
change purse and dump three
pounds of loonies onto the
counter ... you could have
paid with the $20 bill that fell
on the floor when you first
took your gloves off. (You
thanked me for picking the
$20 up and handing it to you.
but really my motives were
purely selfish. I was trying to
get home for Easter!)
And while we're on the sub-
ject of purses, it's a good idea
to sort through the contents
every now and then. say
every time Haley's Comet
comes close enough to the
earth to scare small children.
The last time my mother
went to the hospital for a test,
she produced so many health
cards, she was suspected of
being the -ring leader in' an
elaborate scheme to sell free
gallstone operations to illegal
immigrants.
Please, take my advice, the
quality of health care in this
country does not improve just
because you can produce
enough expired cards to make.
up a euchre deck. Tip: any
card bearing your maiden
name comes out of the wallet
and goes into the album.
Meanwhile back at the
express checkout line which
now looks like a bogus jt,'
application call at a Gent. ,
Motors plant ... you have
paid. you have received your
change and you're cramming -
those coins into that elusive
little change purse when a
really bad idea comes to
mind. No matter how close
your money compartment is
to your photos of grandchil-
dren compartment ... to not, I
repeat, do not take them out
to show the cashier.
I k -now -you think of the
cashier as your friend. But if
you'd look behind you at the
sea of faces flushed with
rage, you'd realize that to the
rest of us she's a potentially
dangerous witness and the
last thing standing between
you and the mob. Sure she's
still smilitig pleasantly at
you, that's- because she's
matured a lot as a person,
since you first arrived!
Okay, if you've already got
them -out. then please. just
names. ages, grades, 'recent,
accomplishments and brief
,testimonials from teachers
,and coaches. But that's it! If
you get into what they did
last summer, I'm tossing a
large bill down on the
counter and I'm going over
to you with my groceries like
an airborne fullback on third
down and goal to. go.
And please don't ask to see
the accountant under the
counter. It's called a scanner
and nobody; including the
cashier, knows how it works.
Think of it as an electronic
Kreskin. It's magic. Leave it
at that...
And I know that the price of
pretty much everything has
increased by several hun-
dreds of dollars per unit since
you were first married but
trust mc, t'iis is no place to
lecture the shier on infla-
tion The alternative
to not buying food is starving
and in my case, the.conse-
quences of a complete review
of the price of eggs since
Vera Lynn sang about
rationing them, is that I'm
about to surprise the front of
my faded Levis with a big
water spot. And the closest
thing A & P has to a wash-
room is the broken hag of
kitty litter on aisle #4.
And finally, let's remember:
old age is that stage of life
when your conversations get
longer but your body gets
shorter.
When you seniors are out
there on the roads, or almost
on°the roads, it's just not
enough for us to see fingers
on the steering wheel to con-
firm the presence of a person
in that car. Wave .every so
often, so we know for sure
you're in there.
(Editor's note: William
Thomas is just 16 years'shy
of 65! We can hardly, wait.)
Huron/Bruce MADD campaign successful.
Dcar Editor
The success of MADD
Huron/Bruce's 'Red Rihhon
Campaign 1996' shows that
the concern of citizens of and
visitors to the towns, villages.
and rural areas of the coun-
ties of Huron and Bruce
regarding the pervasive prob-
lem of impaired driving con-
tinues to grow! Over $3000
was raised in this campaign,
1(H)% of which will be used
locally to aid in 'the fight
against impaired driving, the
most common form of poten-
tially violent crime in our
society today. MADD strives
to change prevalent attitudes
to thc operation of all forms
of vehicles and machinery.
including automobiles.
watercraft, snowmobiles.
motorcycles. ATV's. and
farm machinery by persons
impaired by the. use of alco-
hol or other drugs. Programs
include visits to schools,
workplaces, and community
groups to present .the facts
about impaired driving and
thc terrible consequences•
involved, both to individuals
and society.
MADD and its friends
lobby government at all lev-
els for. necessary and appro-
priate legislative changes as
well as proper enforcement -
of existing legislation and
sentencing of convicted
impaired drivers to a degree
reflecting the severity of their
crime. MADD serves the vic-
tims of drunk drivers, includ-
ing. family members of the
drinking driver. and is often
the only support line these
victims have." The funds
raised in 'Red Rihhon
Keep Canada garbage -free
Dcar Editor.
On Sunday, Feb. 25 1 went -
for a walk from my apart-
ment in Hensall to St. Joseph
ar.d hack. The -day was beau-
tiful. and 1 enjoyed walking
in the country but I did have
a major problem with what 1
saw. Garbage was every-
where! Recently moving
hack -from the United States.
'this bothered me very much.
All my American friends
always asked mc why 1 had
moved to the States as
Canada was such- a pretty and
clean country. This brings me
hack to my walk.
Why -is it that we arc seen
as thc true blue (and green)
north land and thc U.S. high-
ways and ditches arc cleaner?
Bccr bottle.:, papers and pop
cans litter our highways. The
U.S. ha.: a program where
different schools, husinesscs,
and organizations walk along
the ditches and clean up their
roads and highways. Not just,
the main road but hack roads
as well. Maybe it's time for
all Canadians to stand up and
take control over our own
destiny of our country. I
would appreciate and I'm
sure you would appreciate a
cleaner county.
I ask, no 1 beg of one and
all, businesses. schools and
organizations td walk our
countryside and cariy a hag
for garbage and pick up this
litter as we go. Also I -beg
again. not to throw your
garbage out when going for
our Sunday (for that matter.
any) drives. Our children's
future depends on it. 1 am a
proud Canadian.. Let's show
thc world that -we care.
Thank you for reading this
and let us all make a promise
to ourselves to make our
country a place to be proud
Of.
Steven J. Danner
Hensall. ON
Young have too many rights
CONTINUED from page 4
it better than any institution
in this province. I think peo-
plc should check their facts
before putting the blame on
anyone.
There have been riots in
thc past and staff were not on
strike. Young adults in this
province just have too many
rights and way too much. The
more they get the more they
want. you take something
away. ano they have a temper
tantrum. The young adults
arc responsible. It's time to
changc the system. Young
adults should take responsi-
bility for their own actions.
C. McLean,
Blucwatcr Staff
Campaign 1996' will he used
entirely in Huron/Bruce to
expand MADD's current pro-
grams and to establish new'
ones all with the purpose of
reducing the incidence of
impaired driving in our two
counties and beyond.
We would like to thank all
who donated and displayed
the Red Ribbon symbol for
all to see, the volunteers who
distributed and collected the
boxes and ribbons, and the
businesses and professional;
who welcomed the"hoxcs into,
their establishments.
Particular mention must be
made of/the outstanding sup-
port shown to MADE) by
Brian Dcnt of McDonald's
restaurant in Godcrich and
Sally and Brian Rocs of
Wingham's Brian's
Valucmart. We would
encourage other business
people to follow their exam-
ple!
MADD Huron/Bruce will
:ba hosting an open informa-
tion meeting at Lucknow
Arena Complex on the
evening of Thursday, May 2.
All interested people .are
invited and several informed
guests will provide furthcr
insight into the fight against
impaired driving. Details of
this meeting will be pub-
lished throughout
Huron/Bruce in the coming
weeks. Please come out and
see what you can do. to pro-
tect yourself and your family
'fromvthe devastating effects
•of this • all-too-cbmmon
crime. MADD Huron/Bruce
can he reached at 519-357-
4552 (phone/fax/voice mail).
Your readers arc encouraged
to call if they need us, want
toy help, or want more infor-
mation.
Sincerely,
David Magcc
Vice-president, MADD
Huron/Bruce
Chick Days
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Order
April 3
May 8
Pickup
May 3 el
June 7
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Goslings, Ducklings
Turkey Poults
522-0608
Refreshments
Care and feeding recommendations
shavings, waterers, feeders, heat
lamps and the best in Purina
feeds
DC MMM SMALL MAX ntooaAM
THE HURON EXPOSITOR, March 20, 1996-5
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MAIN ST., SEAFORTH 527-1803
St. Columban
1996
SOCCER
REGISTRATION
, DATES
at the SEAFORTH ARENA
(KNIGHTS OF COLUMBUS TOURNAMENT)
SATURDAY, MARCH 23 1;00 TO 3:00
SUNDAY, MARCH 24, 1 1:00 TO 3:00
SUNDAY, MARCH 31 ......12:00 TO 2:00
at St. Columban Church basement
Registration after these dates will cost additional
$10.00 per player. ,
Tykes (5-7).415.00 per player (NOT TRAVELLING)
Junior (8.10)...$35.00 per player
Intermediate (11-13)...$35.00 per player
Seniors (14-16)...$40.00 per player
AN ADDITIONAL $5/PLAYER FOR INSURANCE
Don't Miss Out Only Limited #'s on
each team! r! '
***NEED EXTRA CASH?
REFEREES NEEDED. CALL ANNE AT 345-2404
THE HURON -PERTH COUNTY
ROMAN CATHOLIC
SEPARATE SCHOOL BOARD
JUNIOR AND SENIOR
KINDERGARTEN REGISTRATION
March 25 to March 29, 1996
In order to register for Kindergarten, children must be
four (4) years old of age on or before December 31,
1996. Parents are required to bring the Baptismal
Certificate, Birth Certificate and Immunization Record
Card of the child you intend to register. Parents
should contact the local school. The following schools
offer Kindergarten classes:
St. Joseph's (Kingsbridge) 529-7646
Our Lady of Mt. Carmel (Mt. Carmel) 237-3337
St. Joseph's (Clinton) 482-7035
Precious Blood (Exeter) 235-1691
St. Mary's (Goderich) 524-9901
St. James (Seaforth) 527-0321
St. Boniface (Zurich) 236-4335
Sacred Heart (Wingham) 357-1090
St. Patrick's (Dublin) 345-2033
St. Patrick's (Kinkora) 393-5580
Holy Name of Mary (St. Marys) 284-2170
St. Mary's (Hesson) 595-8929
St. Ambrose (Stratford) 271-7544
St. Joseph's (Stratford) 271-3574
St. Aloysius (Stratford) 271-3636
Jeanne Sauve (Stratford) 273-3396
Parents who expect that their child will enrol in the
optional French Immersion program in Grade 1, in
future years, have the option of enrolment for
Junior/Senior Kindergarten at either their local
Catholic School or the French Immersion Centre (St.
Mary's School, Goderich or Jeanne Sauve School,
Stratford) at which they expect to enrol their child for a
French Immersion program.
M. Miller J.S. Brown, M.A., Ed.D.,
Chairperson of the Board Director of Education