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The Huron Expositor, 1994-02-23, Page 54PAGE 16D -Wednesday, February 23, 1994 Put it down in writing, advises a local lawyer It really is better to have everything in writing, says one Goderich lawyer. - Especially before you get married. Marriage contracts spell out rights and obligations of each partner to the agreement in the marriage or in separation. "If you have two people who are 20 years old, never been married, neither of them is going to have material assets," Norman Pickell said, during an interview recently. "But on the other hand, I'm finding some women - and men, too - are waiting longer to marry. So consequently they've been out working. They've saved up some money. They've put some mutual funds aside." This is when a marriage contract can put an end to argu- ments during separation. "I look at it like a partner- ship agreement - like two people who are going into business for themselves," Pickell says. "That's the time when Cakes by Kathryn * Custom Made Cakes * Your Design or Mine! Soft Cakes, Fruit Cakes or Styrofoam Fountain Rentals * Worry Free Delivery at no extra charge! * Slab cakes for your reception * Order Your Cake Top FOR YOUR HEAVENLY CREATION CALL KATHRYN 524-2453 they're going to be agreeable, when they're going to be caring of each other. They're going to understand each other. They're going to be co- operative." That's the time to enter into such an agreement. Then if things don't work out "they don't have nearly the scrapping or the fighting or the bickering that they would have otherwise." Putting it down on paper also means talking over your expec- tations from and commitment to the marriage. Couples will be more careful with their promises. Let's take for example the case of a wealthy man - he asks his bride to stay home, join the golf and bridge clubs while he works. She gives up her nursing job to comply with his request. She stays home and raises their children. Twenty-five years later he packs up and leaves. He tell§ her to get a job. He doesn't plan to support her. "That's clearly unfair to the woman. She was under the expecta- tion that she was never going to have to work outside of the home," Pickett says. Her education is worthless. She's had no upgrading. She takes a job at mini- mum wage, even though she's used to a much higher standard of living. And she can't prove he ever uttered those promises to take care of her. "If it was the understand- ing that he was going to provide for her ... then write it into the con- tract. Because you will rarely get the husband to admit that when they separate," Pickell says. "It's amazing bow short some people's memories can gel" Assets brought into the marriage and listed in the agreement can be subtracted out of the divorce settlement before the couple's assets are equalized. "You said you brought in $15,000 worth of assets into the marriage and your husband says 'That car was only worth $500 bucks. And you only had $1,000 in the bank'. And of course, who can find their bank book 20 years later to prove it? Whereas, if it's written clown in the marriage contract as a schedule, it's very easy to see it," Pickell says. Family businesses can be protected in the marriage contract. While a marriage contract cannot specify who will have cus- tody of the children, it is possible to set out the direction of education and moral training of the children. So a couple may decide beforehand whether or not their children will be raised in the Catholic education sys- tem, etc. A clause on custody and access to children is not binding, See CONTRACT, P The 'Lucky Sixpence' has become increasingly popular again in recent years From page 14D bride's acceptance of new life. As for the "Something Blue," its origins can be traced to the rhyme, "Those who dress in blue have lovers true." The last line of the poem, "And a Lucky Sixpence for Your Shoe," has gained tremendous popularity in recent years with its story becoming more widely known and followed. In the Victorian Era, brides began to place a sixpence in the heel of the left wedding slipper to ensure wealth and good fortune to the newlywed couple. The sixpence has become a keepsake, as the coin was last minted in 1967 and is now a collector's item. *The final tradition is also meant to bring good luck to the marriage. A tiny sterling silver horseshoe, held by a small blue ribbon (Something Blue...) is sewn into the hem of the bride's wedding gown. The horseshoe has been considered lucky since the early 1400s. The Royal Family helped to make this an extremely popular tradition. The bride should select her own ribbons, determined by the color theme she has chosen. M1LDMAY TENT RENTAL -- - 367-2648 or 367-5403 "*roc Pentwor Teo Sfeetal EveNt4" Chairs and Tables available The Winners of our Winter Carnival "Instant Romance" were John Consitt - Zurich, Victor & Mary Alderson - Grand Bend & Mar:aret Clanc - Grand Bend. 15 Ontario St. S. Grand Bend 238-6193 FIREPLACE