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The Huron Expositor, 1994-02-16, Page 4Lifestyle Talking to .your children about sex\ BY DAVID SCOTT Expositor Staff "Whether you talk to your children about sex or not, they're going to get a sex education," said Jowle Charlebois, „Sexual Health Coordinator with the Huron County Health Unit. "They just have to turn on the TV." Charlebois was speaking on Wednesday evening at the Woman's Resource Centre in Seaforth as pan of their Wednesday lecture series and just in time for Sexual Health Week in Huron County, Feb. 14-20. Surveys indicate the home and the family are preferred sources of sexual education for children. (Although some children who were surveyed claimed they knew more about sex than their parents, said Charlebois). She stressed parents must explain things their children see on televi- sion or videos. "A lot of kids have misconceptions about sex - from other sources." Sexuality is more than just the physical act of sex. It includes: need for affection, closeness, under- standing your body, feelings about your body, relationships with others, responsibility, etc. Although we're bombarded with sexuality in the media we're often unable to talk about it," said the Sexual Health Coordinator. Charlebois stresses the importance of using correct terminology right away. "If you use `wee-wee' or 'wiener,' children will have to unlearn these terms later." Parents often find saying the actual words embarrassing. She suggested saying them (for example) while you're vacuuming to become more com- fortable with the proper terms. A lot of things stem from what we learned when we were younger - and we pass it on to our children, said Charlebois, who teachers two- thirds of a three-part grade eight sexual health program at Huron -- County elementary schools: The other lesson is taught by the AIDS Coordinator. In the near future, the health unit will be sending parents information at home about what kids are learn- ing in class. "Ih the past we'd give them (stu- dents) pamphlets and tell them to take them home and talk to their parents and they would roll their eyes," said Charlebois. She thinks Clarification During the editing process several paragraphs were deleted from a story on Tuckersmith Township's favourable reaction to a Hensall Fire Board budget, which had a spending decrease. The article as printed created a false impression that councillors had a concern about Hensall spending increases. The com- ments which referred to concem about spending increases were actually in relation to the Seaforth Area Fire Board, not Hensall. The Huron Expositor apologizes to the Hensall Fire Board and Tuckersmith Town- ship for the mistaken impression created. "Avoid making children feel guilty and fike sure you're answering what they want to now." DAVID scorr PHOTO SEXUAL EDUCATOR - Josee Chariebois, Sexual Health Coordinator with the Huron County Health Unit, hosted a lecture entitled "How To Talk With Your Children About Sex," at the Woman's Resource Centre in Seaforth on Feb. 9. parents will want to read the material they send and get refreshed. Talking to your children about sex shouldn't just be a one-time event. "Don't just sit down once but many times. And don't be gender specific - where father talks to son and mother talks to daughter." It's important to teach children how to say `no' and inform them of the risks involved with sex: sexual- ly transmitted diseases (STDs, including AIDS); unwanted preg- nancies; and also feelings of guilt they may experi6nce - something not often talked about. Charlebois suggest to parents who claim they dont have the informa- tion to talk to their children about sex, to go to the library and get the information. "It's easier to talk about sexuality if you're comfort- able about it." She adds that you don't have to be an expert. "There are some questions I don't know the answer to." The number of teen pregnancies in Canada every year is approxi- mately 50,000. A few of those include children as young as 11 and 12. "A girl could potentially get preg- nant before her first period," said Charlebois. "That's a common question I'm asked." The Huron County Health Unit's Sexual Coordinator said how you have to handle the topic of sexual- ' ity differently with each age group. Three to six year olds just need short, factual responses. "Don't tell them they were brought be- the stork," said Charlebois. "It's amazing that parents will give their children information about everything except sex." At a young age the best thing to do is explain briefly the sperm and egg join together when mother and father make love, said Charlebois. Also explain public and private places to do things. "It helps the child reason out things." When the child is in the 6-12 age range it's important to avoid street language and use appropriate terms. "Avoid making children feel guilty and make sure you're answering what they want to know." Charlebois said the Huron County Health Unit has upgraded their sexual health films for the grade six program and have current videos from 1992. She offers other tips for parents: If you wait for your children to ask about sex, it may not happen. • Bring the subject up but don't lecture. • There are many teachable moments that arise from TV. If a program brings up something you dont agree with, shut it off and explain to your children. • Create a feeling of being able W talk even about taboo topics. • Try to avoid a strong emotional reaction. • Confirm the question - what infor- mation does the child already know? • Try to cultivate a sense of humour to make discussions easier. • The earlier you start to talk about sex the easier is it. Charlebois says parents shouldn't be alarmed if they find their teens have birth control devices. "They may have birth control but haven't started yet." Additional facts: • One in six teenage girls have been pregnant by the time they are 20 years of age. • In Ontario in 1986, approximately 15,000 teenagers were pregnant. • Almost half of Ontario's teenagers have had sexual intercourse by the age of 17. • Four out of five teens are sexually active by the agq of 19. • Twenty-five per cent of teens having sex for the first time do not use a condom. • Between 1976-86, when the Huron County Health Unit intro- duced their sexual health program, teen pregnancies dropped 58 per cent Ail Huron County. However, the rate is starting to increase. • The Huron County Health Unit is interested in doing a sexual health survey of Huron County students in the near future. "They teach us about the dangers of drinking and driving, why don't they tell us more about birth con- trol?" - from "Talking Sense to Teens, About Sex" pamphlet pub- lished by the Ontario Women's Directorate. THE HURON EXPOSITOR, February IS, 19114-3 Bailey's of Hensall Ltd. Heating - Air Conditioning Hwy. 04 N. H.naali 262-2020 262-2626 Your Homo Comfort P.opl. Sins 1981 4t> low ARDI SPRAYER CLINIC THURSDAY, FEB. 17 1:30 P.M. Orange Hall, Seaforth An Information Packed Afternoon MILTON J. DIETZ LTD • Purina Chows • Health Aids • Ventilation Equipment • Pesticides • Spraying Equipment • Aerial & Ground Application R R 44, SEAFORTN, ONT. NOK 1 WO PHONE: (519) 522-0608 Four point plan for parents FACTS: Your child deserves an answer and you don't have to be an expert to respond. Don't let your emotions affect your response. VALUES: Values are what you believe in. If you want your child to have your values about sexuality, then share your values with them. If not, they may adopt someone else's values or those they see on TV. RESPONSIBILITY: W1i,:ti answering a child's questions en sexuality, be swe to let the child know what you expect of them and what their responsibilities are. SELF-ESTEEM: Your child needs to have positive feelings about themselves and their body. Answer your child's questions in a way that will make them feel good about themselves. Sexual Health week in Huron County branch offices. Year of the Family and the Parents of children in day-care positive role that parents play in centres and nursery schools will providing sexual health informa- be given newsletters and "Talk tion to their children. Sex" pamphlets with tips on For further information, call talking with children about sex. the Sexual Health Program, Sexual Health Week '94 sup- Huron County Health Unit, 482 - ports the theme of International 3416 or 1-800-265-5184. February 14-20 is Sexual Health Week in Huron County. The theme this year is "Sexual Health Education Begins at Home." Pamphlets, bookmarks and posters will be displayed at Huron County libraries and Huron County Health Unit • FINAL CLEARANCE Up to 1) OFF FALL 0 AND WINTER MERCHANDISE 4 DAYS ONLY! —Vitl., Thurs., Fri, and Sat. Feb. 16, 17, 18, 19 • ALL SALES FINAL • Cash and Cheques Only For This Sale AitITaik lady FASHIONS 43 Albert Street Clinton, Ontario 482-7872 HOT WINTER BUYS Sure to WARM YOU UP! umpernlc Bread .sog1.29 Chocolate Chip Cookies Crusty Rolls 1.49 1. 29 Dozen Per Dozen COSTELLO-VINCENT 2337:130 Deb Vincent 527-1865 Personal Income Tax Preparation • Starting at $20. • No GST on services. • Guaranteed Income Supplement form completed free of charge when income tax return prepared • Bookkeeping services also available. CALL TODAY! OCEAN PERCH 4.4f`LB Casa Lisa ENCHILADASPkg. of rolls 5.19 T-BONE STEAKS 4.19 L SIRLOIN TIP ROASTS 3.79 LB. Bruce Packers BACON 2.99 LB. Clearview Deli Sliced TURKEY BREAST 4.99LB. SEAFORTH GROCERY 23 Main St. S. 527-2044 MONARCH MOIST PLUS POUCH CAKE MIX 240GM CRISCO VEGETABLE OIL 1 LITRE2 .75 CAMPBELL'S VARIETY •tkef Broth •Consomme •Chicken Broth SOUPS 284 ML 9 Pepsi Products 750 ml Bottle Reg. or Diet only9 Pepsi, Reg. or Pepsi Max Case of 24-355 mi Cans Case 5.99 PURITAN STEWS 680 GM .89 NO NAMETM SPECIAL DiNNER DOG FOOD .49 8 KG. We take phone orders to serve you better! Free Delivery in Egmondville & Seaforth Wee Willy's Baked Goods Now Available ••-• We Reserve the right to limit quantities to normal family rcquircmcnta. MON., TUTS., WED., & SAT. 8:30 am • 6:00 pm THURS. & FRi., 8:30 am • 9:00 pm SENIORS 5% DISCOUTNT EVERY WEDNESDAY Assorted Squares 6 for • Date • Fruit • Brownie .99 Cheese Tea 6 for Biscuits 1.79 "Fresh off the Block" Colby Cheese Danish Blue Cheeses 3.99A 4.994 Prices in effect until closing Saturday, Feb. 19 Try our "fresh hot coffee' and Fresh daily "Soups and Sandwiches" Thank You THE SEAFORTH COMMUNITY HOSPITAL "CELEBRATE 30 YEARS!" DINNER/DANCE COMMITTEE wish to express sin- cere appreciation to everyone for their participatiqn and sup- port of the Dinner/Dance held on February 5, 1994. We wish to express sincere gratitude to: Hildebrand Flowers and Gifts, Dot's Specialty Shoppe, John Drummond, Arena Staff, !Ivy's Patio, Flower Magic, Grace Campbell, Optimist Club, lirCulligan and ice Culture for their assistance. A special "THANK YOU" to the following for their 'generous door prize donations: Abbott Laboratories Andre, Sawmill Creek, Hildebrand, Brights, Jackson - Triggs, Colio & Corby Anna's Dress Shoppe Archle's UCO Bauer Travel Benmiller Inn Bob & Betty's Variety Boilersmith Ltd. Boussey's Beauty Boutique Buckhoms Gun & Tackle Canadian Tire •CP Hotels Culligan Real Estate Diane Cook Dr Tom Devereaux Dynacare East Huron Poultry Egmondville Store Ellen Smith Erins Beverages Etfs Delvecchlo Finance Department of SCH Frank Phillips G.M. Machan Consulting Godfather Pizza Grace Cambell Graham Bowker Gwen Devereaux Aloette Gymbags HA8Farms Harvey Dale Helen Vock - Avon Hensall District Co-op (Seaforth Division) London Hospital Linen Servile Inc. Huron Sports Outfitters Huron Expositor J.C.'s Hair Design Jackie's Donuts Leonard Strong Linda O'Rourke Lyons Food Market Marion Kernighan Mediox Pat Koehler Pete's Paper Clip Pizza Train ProResp Province of Ontario Bank Randy Poisson Robert Watcher Ron Broome Seaforth Creamery Seaforth Insurance Seaforth Plumbing & Heating Seaforth Jewellers Seaforth Hospital Auxiliary Seaforth Fire Department Seaforth Co-op Daycare Shoreline Health Co. Siemens Electric Ltd. Sills Hardware Sparky's Restaurant Stedmans V & S Stephen Smith Superior Propane Tasty -Nu Bakery Taylor's Market Whitney-Ribey Funeral Home Wirerths Shoes If we have missed anyone, please accept our thanks as Everyone's contribution was greatly appreciated. well. 6.