Exeter Advocate, 1901-2-28, Page 6r0
1001•MiMMMr
HOW TO PROPOSE.
rentdive mantnta, for you mut be alone;,
A man can't "pop" before n chal>e1'orl.
Then choose a;site—the yard is just. the place,
Beaeath the Chinese lanterns magic blaze --
But iR the band is playing' "Bag Time Lou,"
And if tete crowd all "rubberneck" at you,
Then take her somewhere where the light is dim,
Take her to. Beck or even to the gym.
When you have found a site, ask her to sit.
With you and watohthe juicy Julie bug pit,,
Or spring some other like poetic thought,
For by poetic words they oft are caught,
Recite to her some drip about the moon,
That r,-reat round orb that loveth those who spoon,
And speak of love, of ceaseless love galore;
But do not speak of those you've loved before.
Then cast a few deep breathings on the air,.
Put on a look of seeming sad despair
And cry aloud: "My college life is, done.
I've got to face this cruel world alone.
Alone 1 have to face its fearful knocks,
With none so poor to mend my holey socks."
And then, if she's the girl she ought to be,
She'll shyly mutter, "Weil, what's wrong with
me?"
parcel, ,clad yet 1 was berrying away
anti dodging among the crowd, I real-
ly didn't come to myself until reaching
nay chambers, and then I was. ID two
minds. Conscience demanded that I.
return the money, and the devil whis
jeered to me to retain it. I dodged be-
tween the two by prornisiug to return
it as soon as it should be advertised. I
even promised 'my conscience that
would -make a long journey if neces-
sary to restore the money. To show
you treat I was still an honest Ulan let
111e say that when a bill was presented.
to are that evening for tele care of my
Horse I found a mistake of a sixpence
in favor of the stable and rectified it.
Yes; i was still honest, and I meant to
restore that money, but I must first be
satisfred as to the ownership.
Next day, to my great surprise and
also to my gratification, no advertise-
ment appeared. It was my duty as an
—Harvard Lampoon,. honest man to either advertise or take.
s ritae, + . CeD t30,aiika ai,�ai9 the money to the cost property office of
the railroad line. 'You will agree with
I me that it was, and yet I brought for-
ward a dozen ergumeuts to the contra-
ry and didn't do'either one. When a
et week had gone by and no advertise
I went appeared, I began to look upon.
the money as mine. In three days
4. PIA
ni a c . ce
INTE
-a
8
1
more I felt sure it was mine. ' At the
BY M. Quad. 0 end of the second week I was figuring'
Copyright, 1000
wbat use to make of it. It wasn't e-
13y C. B. Lswrs. actly that the find had lenoeked out all
CAJY`f camyY at7V"+ v'e the principles 30 years had built up,
For 30 years or more I had known but that I had never before been tempt-
ed. Without temptation I had argued
myself to be an honest man- i mean i only one side of the question: After a
that I had never wronged a fellow man
week had gone by I dared not return
out of so much as a penny, though I the package to the railroad, and after
had had hundreds of opportunities. In • three weeks had passed with no adver-
my business dealings I had been abso- tisement the money seemed to belong
lutely square 1f not a little too liberal,'to me. I said to myself that I ought to
and in private life I bad gone out of advertise it, but I also argued that if
my way to prove my integrity. I had the loser hadn't interest enough to seek
found umbrellas and journeyed half to recover such a sum of money bow
way across London to restore them. 1' could I be expected to? Unless you
had found small sums of money and ; are a strictly honest man, as T knew
paid' for the advertising out of my own , myself to be, you have no idea of the.
pocket. I had taken in homeless dogs many arguments that can be advanced
and fattened them up and sent them ; in favor of dishonesty
home in cabs. I had been cheated in ; At the end of three weeks I had de -
buying a cob, but in selling him again termined to add the find to my bank.
I had pointed out the spavins. I had . account and give it up when called up-
bought Soutb African stocks at SO and on. Aye, I would even pay interest on
sold tbem at 100, though the market the sum and . any extra expense the
price was 110. In buying and over- i loser hacl been put to. This seemed
hauling an old cabinet I had found pa- 1 more than fair to me, and -I figured
pers of value and restored them with -1 that my honesty had not suffered one
out demanding a reward. 1 jot. The money would have gone to.
It never occurred to me to pat myself the bank, as per programme, but my
on the back for an honest man, but in valet stepped in. He was not an hon-
e general way I realized that 1 was est man, as I am deeply grieved to say.
He could not stand temptation. Com-
ing across the package by accident. he
tucked it under his arm and walked off,
and I have never since set eyes on him.
I could not well. go to the police and
ask them to bunt for him, and so he
had a clear road. After he had disap-
peared I could not advertise for the
real owner and let him take the trail,
and so the dishonest rascal was free to
head for America, where, S am told,
honesty is a scarce article among
men. As a matter of fact, no owner
ever came forwarcl or has not up to
date. That inakes the motley mine or
gives me the guardianship of it, but as
it is in the hands of a dishonest valet.
and as 1 deed -not-put the police after
him T am ei.i,(, 0 out of pocket and have
nothing to show for my sterling integ-
rity of character. Sometimes in re-
viewing this case I doubt if it pays to
be honest, but again I reflect that -a
clear conscience is ample reward for
FIVE NEAT PACKAGES OF BANN OF ENGLAND withstanding temptation.
NOTES.
above temptation. I must admit that
it was a balmy feeling and that as I
looked around upon my fellow men and
knew that not over one in ten tbousand
was honest --as honest as 1 was—my
self importance was greatly added to.
Several queer tbings happened me one
June day. I had been down to Oxford
on a little business, and as I settled my
bill at the hotel previous to departure
the landlord made a mistake of a shil-
ling In my favor. 1 called his attention
to it, of course. I bad to make change
witb cabby at the depot, and he would
have beaten himself out of fourpenee
had. 1 not called his attentionto the
mistake. A ticket seller rarely makes a
mistake., at least in favor of a traveler,
but on thisoccasion 1 was given quite
o bit of ebange too much, and though I
received only a gruff word as 1 return-
ed it I had cleared my conscience. I
shared the compartment with a travel-
er, a roan who had hunched up shoul-
ders, pulled his hat low down and
seemed to sleep for the 30 miles he
rode with me. In tbe baggage rack
was a paper parcel, but he didnot take
It with him as be got out. For 20 min-
utes after being left alone I had no cu-
riosity about that parcel. Then it oc-
curred to me to inspect the contents
and be ready to turn it over as lost'
property on arrival at. the terminus.
My interest was languid until the
parcel was opened, L' bad anticipated'
nothing of value, but what did I be-
hold? In that parcel or package were
five neat packages of Bank of England
notes, each one containing E1,000. There
wasn't so much as a scrap' of paper
with them, nothing whatever to prove
ownership or tell bow they had got
there. The wrapper ; was common
brown paper and had been used before.
It was a queer find,.' and 1 cotaldn't
make out whether the money belonged
to the passenger who bad just left or
some one before him t had no idea. of
L
CREASED TROUSERS MANAGED TO
SPOIL A HAPPY EVENING.
Eveerthde ay Wad Going A9onta Splen-
dlaliy Until Mr's.. Bowar:er :Made O
Innoceant Remark That Was Fol-
lowed by Untoreseea Conieeaneneee
of a Dire Natare.
' 1000, byC. B. Lewis.][Copyright,
1 :
No fireside` souhave d 3ti e beenmore
peaceful andhappy than that of the
Bowsers' at 7 o'clock the other evening.
Mrs. Bowser' had a book in her hands,
Bowser the evening paper, and the
'family cat lay on the hearth. rug and
purred and chuckled and decided that
she had a soft snap for the winter
Without cold winds 'blew and snow
robbery, but laid 11 all to carelessness.
After inspecting the bilis I retied the
package and smiled a bit at the con-
sternation of the loser. Itis loss would
be only temporary, however. The pack-
age would be handed over In London,
and he would merely have to prove
property erty to obtain possession. He
might wish to reward me, but I would
not accept a penny.
It was only when the train ran into
the station that 1 suddenly changed my
Mind. As the porter unlocked the door
and tiaseed on and 1 stepped out the
thotight came to me' to retain that
money; , Before I could argue with my -
Pelf nay legs were carrying nie off. I
was meaning all the tittle to give up the
Both Rave Equal Rights.
It is the duty of a pedestrian to keep
upon the sidewalk save when it is nec-
essary to cross the roadway, and then
to cross atan opportune moment and
with reasonable expedition. It is, nev-
ertheless, equally the duty of those in
charge or vehicles, however propelled,
to restrain them within reasonable
speed, to, keep them under constant
control and steerage way and to exer-
cise all possible diligence in avoiding
collisions. They are as much bound to
look out for pedestrians at tbe cross-
walks as pedestrians are to look out for
them. They are as much bound to
slacken their speed to avoid collision
as the pedestrian is to quicken his. It
is in fact far easier for the meii on the;
vehicles to keep their eyes on the pe-
destrians and avoid running them
down than it is for the pedestrians- to
keep theirs on the multitude of vehi-
cles' which may be converging upon
them from different directions. Simply
ringing the gong is not enough. "Caveat
pedes" is not the only rule of the road.
--New York Tribune,
The Work of Salvation.
Mrs. Pudunker—Seems to me 'tisn't
exactly rightto be addin so much we -
ter to the milk, 'specially' on Sunday
marnin.
Deacon Pudunker (milkman)—Why,
Miranda, you, wouldn't stand in the
way of salvation, would ye?
"0f course not."
"Well, don't ye know one-half of
them what goes to church never hears
a word because they're asleep an snor-
In he the pewit? It's ehamefud!"
"Indeed it is. But they shouldn't
fall asleep."
"They can't help it, Miranda. Give
people rich milk, an they're bound to
feel sleepy. It's worsethan opium.
Pump a 'little more, Miranda."—New
York Weekly,
SOLID COMFORT.
flakes fell; within were warmth° and
cheer and contentment. By and by ;lir.
Bowser felt the influence, and he look-
ed up from his paper and said:
"Well, now, but this is horue! What
reasonable man could ask for more
than this?"
"Yes; it is cozy," answered Mrs.
Bowser.
"How a man can leave a fireside like
this to hang out at:a club is more than
I can make out. If all men had homes
like this, there would be nothing but
happiness in married life. Why can't
all wives be like you?"
Mrs. Bowser took the alarm at once.
Every wife knows that her husband :s
don't want s'oe to think you are tied to
the house, And
how about new car-
pets
a](furniture?"
"We don't need any."
'dflianks to you, and I appreciate It,
By George,but when I remember how
many rows 'I haye raised over nothing
at all I wonder that you haven't been
d..
driven to get a divorce. I expect there
are plenty of women who would have
brained me with lbe poker. Can you
ever forgive me?"
d to
Mrs. Bowser was cletel•Llaine
subject charge the and avert the ca-
lamity, and a bright thought came to
her.
"You took a pair of trousers to the
t r to. be pressed,"
tailor the of c evening!� ,
she said as she rose up.
'Yes, and has he sent them home?"
"They came up this afternoon and
are in that bundle oyer there. I won -
dei if there are any buttons missing?"
The package was untied, and Mr.
Bowser held them up to view. He had
taken them to the tailor to have the
creases renewed, and the tailor seemed
to have made au excellent job of it.
Mr. Bowser was about to lay then
aside, with a nod of satisfaction, when
he gave a sudden start of surprise, and
the smile his face had worn during the
last half hour was replaced by a look
of sternness.
"What Is it?" she asked.
He took the leg of the trousers and
stretched it out at arm's length acid
squinted along the crease like a man
looking along the edge of a board.
"You took this package in?" he asked
as he finished squinting along the leg.
eyes.,,
"And you knew they were my trou-
sers?"
"Of course. What is wrong with
them?"
"What Is wrong with theme" he re-
peated as his neck began to grow red.
"If you were the sort of wife you
ought to be, you'd know what wits
wrong with them. You'd have known
it hours ago and brought that tailor to
book instead of assisting him in his
chicanery."
"But what is it?"
"Can't your own eyes tell you? Look
along these creases. Do they follow a
straight line or do they wabble
crook?
"They seem to be e, -.-...eget," replied
Mrs. Bowser after squinting.
OPEN THE DOOR.
Open the door, let in the air;
The wends are sweet, and tete flowers are fair.
Joy is abroad in the world toelay;
If our door lit wide, it may come, this way,
Open the door!
Open the door, let In the sun;
He bath a smile for every one;:.
He hath made of the raindrops gold and gems,
11e may change our teats to diadem;
Open the door!
Open the door of the soul; let in.
Strong, pure thoughts which shall banish sin,
They will grow and bloom with a grace divine,
And their fruit shall be sweeter than that of the
vine.
Open the door!
Open the door of the hcart; let in
Sympathy sweet for Stranger and kbn.
le will make the balls of the heart so Pair
That angels may enter unaware.
Open the doors
--British Weekly.
ing until we had finished our soup: .
thenIle leaned forward and tappeds
my wife's elbow softly.
e 'Pardon me, madam,' she said, `but .
will you kindly tell me where you got
that cape?'
"She spoke in a whisper, but my wife
and I heard and the woman's compare-
ion—that
an
, p
ion—that man out there on the plat.
'form -also heard. The poor fellow
looked as If he would literally shrivel
up with mortification. 'Caroline,' he
adnaonished 'for heaven's sale, kee
your temper. Don't make a scene.'
3 i
"'I'm not malting a'scene,' retorted
the woman; `I'ln simply asking this
lady where shegot her wrap. SurelY,
she has no objectionanswering a
harmless(i uestion like that.'
"My . wife's 'face was very white,
which with her is a sign of auger, but
she ausn•ered coolly: 'Certainly not. I
'ra�6dsrirrF t^j" don't think it any of; your business;
but, if you must know, I bought it, orr,
rather, my husband bought it at Sell
�� o ers'. 'He paid , ' she added proudly,
'$200' ,
LIFE
for It,
n"The' little man sink back with a
sigh of relief, but the woman dashed
cologassveimulawi On another coat of war paint, 'I don't
BY EMPIMA W. WISE.
wiser to appear, rude, she said, but I
The man with the red mustache nod.' feel compelled to tell you that that cape
ded in friendly manner to themeek
looking passenger on the front plat.
form.
"There is a strong affinity between
that man and myself," he said. "I sup-
pose it was the circumstances under
was never bought in that store. It h
mine. It was stolen frpm my house'
"My wife flashed me a frightened,
questioning glance. 'Donald,' she gasp-
ed.
" `Never,' I said fervently.
"'iliore than a year ago,' proceeded
which we became acquainted that unit-
_ the woman.
ed us in ties of brotherly love. e " "Oh;' ejaculated my wife, 'that's
were both sufferers in the same cause 'different! I've had the .garment only
and consequently were in a position to two months. - You can't blames us.'
sympathize with each other. The cause "Now that I had been exonerated of
of our trouble was a fur cape. Four the theft I felt bold enough to put In
years ago this winter my wife took a an oar of my own. `Madam,' said I,
notion that she wanted a: cape of Per- since you seem so positive that this
scan lamb. She wasn't as reasonable cape once belonged to you, perhaps you.
in financial matters then as she now is, won't mind explaining your means of
and when I intimated that I' couldn't identiiicatiou.'
afford that luxury she pouted and "'I can identify it,' she said, `by the
showed a disposition to be generally handkerchief` pocket Do you see these
ugly. tiny buttons 'stitched around the top?
"'I haven't had anything new for a Well, they are arranged in the form of
good while,' she said. 'I've skimped the letters "C. D." Those are my Inn
along and saved and worried and tials. They stand for Caroline Drake.
pinched all summer, and I don't think That is my name. Now are you sat -
it looks right to act stingy with it isfied I'll warrant you wouldn't find
now. I worried through last winter.' anotber pocket in town trimmed like
too, with next to nothing, and I really that. It was my own idea and strictly
think I deserve the cape.' original.'
"But theee are not, and I believe you "That was her parting shot ae I left "My wife looked at the buttons in -
The Gravy Wan Cold.
Stanley (aged 4 years) - Mamma,
please sing that lovely song called
"The Hash Is Cold."
Mamma—t don't ireow any such hong
about hash,- Stanley. Is It a funny
song?
i
Stanley—No, indeed, mamma; It's n
"sorrow song."
Mamma --Well, I can't think what
you mean.
A -little later she sings from "My
Dearest heart" "The grave is cruel,
the grave is cold."
Stanley (excitedly)—That's it, mama
ma; that's it! But I made a mistake
It wasn't the hash; it was the gravy.
r
%r
MR. BOWSER SLIGHTLY VEXED.
dangerous when too good. She started
to say something about a neighbor's
child being sick, but he interrupted her `
with:
"Yes; I suppose so,but it is probably
owing to the mother's carelessness. I
was thinking today that I was not half
thankful enough for the blessings that
surround me. Do you know that if I
hadn't married just the right sort of
wife I might have turned out a bad,
bad man?"
"I am glad and satisfied that you are
happy," she replied, "but don't ` you
think it dreadful the way some of the
coal cart men use their poor horses?
One was going past here today when"—
"I know nothing about coal cart
horses," he chipped in, "butt do know
that I have the nicest little wife In all
the world. Where would 1 be tonight
but .: for you and this scene of comfort
and happiness? Put away your book
and let's, talk. I,` presume you think
there are times when I don't fully ap-
preciate you, but even when I get read
and storm around I never lose sight of
your many good „qualities. And,too,
you know I am always sorry forgiving
way to my, temper. It is awfully good
of you to overlook my failings.
ears. Bowser was in for it, and there
was 110 escape. She couldn't faint
away, and she could think of no excuse
to get out of the house. She therefore
smiled and replied:,.
"We get along as well as most folks,
Whatis the news from China today?"
"Yes; you are always willing to over-
look my faults," he continued as he
reached out his foot and toyed with
the cat, "and I want you to know that
I appreciate it to the- fullest extent.
Didn't yob say something about a new
dress the other day ?"
"If I did, I can wait for a month op
two more.
"'There is no need of waiting a day.
In the morning I will give you $50 for
a new dress. As you may need other
things I think I'll make it $75. Never
be afraid to ask me for looney, I've
been thinking we ought to go out more.
What is to prevent us from going to the
theater twice a week this winter?"
"I should like to go at least once a
week."
"It shall be twice or three times, and
we'll get up card parties for the other'.
evenings. Would you like to keep a
second girl?"
"Oh no. ' :You see, there is so little to
rlo, and the cook has lots of time to
help up stairs." '
"11 .you want one, just say so 1
nave known it for hours.See there. tion shop,'he said. `If id is a cage you a shameful way. to treat you,' she said.
These creases are at least three inches
nt ou haf yoost in time come.' Thi; `I'm„ very sorry, but men are all alike.'
- r day
the breakfast table, and all the morn- differently. 'I see nothing convincing
ing it rankled in a vital spot. 'I could about that,' she said. `We'll all go
not be oblivious to the fact that the down to Sellers' tomorrow" and settle
dear
woman had indeed got through the matter there.'
the last year with a limited wardrobe, I "Again my heart palpitated. I knew
and I made up my mind to strain a . Sellers, and I was also well aware that
point and see If I couldn't make the that cape would never bear investiga-
riffle in regard to the coveted cape. I tion at their 'hands. '_ In order to pre'
went up town that afternoon fully de• vent still more painful complications 1
termined that if I could get a good gar- did .what I should have done in the
--ment at a reasonable figure I would first place. I told how I came by the
buy it at once, `; even though the put- cape. As I finished my tale of trans -
chase might entail the sacrifice' of a gression and late repentance'I looked
number'; of little luxuries I had cohnted across the table appealingly, but my
e inY wife
turned her back squarely upon
on laying, for'my own use. in the wife
near future. Finale I came to a win- remarks to the
and addressed her
dow in which a number of apparently woman.
superfine • fur wraps were on exhibi " `Madam,' she said, 'take your old
tion. The store was a pawnshop, but cape. Pray, take It at once. 1 wouldn't
on the impulse of the moment I step• wear it again le it were the last wrap
ped in and asked the proprietor if he on earth. I'd go home in my bare
had any capes in Persian lamb. : shoulders first. To think that my bus-
" `I haf,' said he -`I haf von of de band, who has always pretended to be
ferry vinest cabes in dis down, and so fond of me and for whom I have
am gifing him avay dird 'cheat)? ' borne so much, should insult me by
"The fellow ransacked around in am giving me a capethat he had picked
Inner room for a few minutes and a up in a pawnshopcuts me to the heart
length returned with a garment which C' am grieved beyond expression. His
even; my uncritical eye could, tell at a_ conduct is really incredible, and I don't
glance was the real thing. think I shall ever get over rt,,
"`I vas aboud to send id to de aug "Mrs. Drake sighed softly. It' was
out of true at the bottom, an wha
will be the effect when I put the trou
sers on? I will look to be a bow legged the nerve to buy this cape in a pawn
-
deem of course, and of course that was in here, by a man' who bromised to re•
oman 'but deem id ride avay soon, bud now more . shop, 1 shouldn't be at all surprised to
caber is magneeflcent—length, 27 inch. ' "'Quite true,' assented my wife ami -
es; sweep, 120 inches.. Id vas broughd ably, `and now, since my husband had
the plot. By blunder, w learn that your husband sold It there.
things have come to a pretty pass!" as a year haf passed, und-he not show
"u , so I shall sell de cabe. How much "I' looked around; at Drake, who
"Mr.B you are!"I, seemed fora moment on the pont of
Bowser, how sit
"Oh, yes; oh, yes! 'Because i don't You dink id worth?'
•" 'How much do you think?' I asked. vanishing under tele table. He braced
want to look like a man straddler of a ,. - 200 up, however, and spoke out with a
`V ell.' said he, Ld. Is easy vol th $
bravery second to none but my own.
`I
did,' he said firmly. `Now that we
are all in for it I may as Well own up.
It was the time I had to pay that bill
of Harnmond's. Callie; don't you re-
member? I thought -I could redeem
the thing in a little while and you
would never:: know it had been taken
out of the house, but a cold snap came
along ahead of time, and you discover-
ed your ' loss. -I didn't dare "confess
then. I talked you into thinking bur-
glars
urglar•s had swiped it.'
"'You thought you had talked mi
into that belief,' retorted Mrs. Drake.
'I never really thought so. I thought
all the time ;your mother had,stolen it
That's the reason 1 never made any ef•
fort to find it. I .felt sure the detectives
would trace it to her if I. pushed tile
Yotrousers , matter, and out of consideration for
sneak k down after "me and bribe o.clocl.•. 'Lhat evening when I got home.
You sea with ,your feelings I let the teeing drop.' And
him to squeeze' the creases so. that I mY wife was Paltry effervescing w rt
Why happiness and aftection, this is the reward I. get for my self
will be an object of "joule. W y .�+ sacrifice'
don'tyoupoison m coffee? Why don't It was 'so lovely of you, Donald.
you
y " said. `Areyou reallysure you "It `vas my wife's turn to offer con•
ruui�der me In my sleep? she
him and `vent
stairs could afford it? After you were gone solation, 'Men are all;•alike,' she said.
She passedup "l looked at Drake, and Drake looked
breathand real- this morning I felt: awfully ashamed - -".
and the cat bele? her.
having ncross. 1 at rue. 'They are,' we said in unison: �w
feed that a crista' was at hand. Mr. of myself for been so t
.knowyou always do the very best you Mrs. Drake took the fuer .cape home
Bowser glared about him for a moment 'ith bei• and I lead to o ❑ to our
as he made ready to break loose, and can by me. 1 hope, dear, that you w g 1?
didn't skintyourself in anyway In or -house and bring clown my wife's old
then, with a yell, he seined the offend .,P Z
r and with -a mighty,der to buy this lovely wrap. Are you jacket before she would budge out o
Ing cbtr, Pc '? the` restaurant. Practicallyspeaking, '
wrench 'he tore the back seam up and ; sure it was wise to buy it at Sellers'?
i • '. Tb that ended the acquaintance between
le in either hand. .Shore was They are so high priced. How mac
held a g
did payfor this, Donald, dear?i' us and the Drapes. Still, Drake and
nothing „alive in the ronin except. the you
in ed for -ger with a le"My wife's unsi lilted praise of my 1 meet around town occasionally, just
sat, He jumped g as we' did this evening, and we always
swinging about his head, and Mrs. generosity fed my vanity and made rueg
g'MSS the 'time of cls As I *said we
Bowser beard a meow, a crash and a desirous to maintain a high standard 1 � Y•
Bowsunderstand .eacb other,and the cut-
e-vet'
ut-
Call. ale had struck a chair and fallen in here estimation, and I said coolly,
o er it andplowed along the carpet.
`,f ' ' rent of our mutual r sympathy path very
v.wo hundred dollars: , Y I y is
Ws nose while the eat bad escap- "For two months after the advent strong."—New
York; herald.',
With ,
ed. An appalling silence followed, and of the Persian lamb cape into our
household we were superlatively ha-
it was a title giiai�ter"oC an hour before ! hap
-
she heard a Voice hoarsely whispering py. But all the while clouds were gath-
n't wonder that husbands are ering on the domestic horizon upper-
T do
driven to dilute I only wonder that ceived'by me, and one day the storm
they don't become naurderer;s as well as buret.` We 'were dining In a;'popular
•
barrel I am silly! How much did you
have to• pay the tailor to carry this but I sell id cheab. I let you haf de
conspiracy with. you? - And when you cage for 550 cash.'
had made me the laughing stock of the "I examined the garment ,carefully.
neighborhood what other scheme did The fur, as far as I could see, was in
ou have to work? It would have been ,excellent condition. The Lining was
y the without flaw,' and there were a tone
sweet music to your - ears - to, hear I fell
boys shouting, 'Old bow legged Bow-= and style to the cut that would,
serf after me on the street." inure, bring joy to the heart of my fas•
+ " said tidious wife. With all the cape's mer..
"1 wish:. - you d be reasonable,
Mrs. Bowser as she tossed the trousers` its, I:was not ready to swear that the
on the lounge. "One minute you praise
me, and everything is all right, and the
next" -
5200 valuation was correct, but I was
positive that it was worth 550, and 1
rashly closed the bargain then and
"Never!" be interrupted as he kicked : there.' I carried the cape down to my
at the cat. "I have never praised you office myself. 1 lead there a large pa -
and don't mean to. There will be no per -box bearing the address of a relia-
theater and 110 card parties. A wife ble furrier, and in - this I packed the
bo'lI cons ire' against her husband wrap and gave it to a messenger boy,
c5 P g
ought to -be sent to state prison.' I take `w'itb instructions to be sure to deliver
t to a tailor to be creased
the package at my house before
rlf'unksirdsl" M. QUAD, , "estaurrant wi.len the deluge came. The
' woman who Sat Lit the srnail table at
Flacennetattee our right milled nut the stopper and
"Whiit happened when you ten 111 precipitated the catastrophe. She
love?" watched my wife closely as she remov
"1 was broke:"—Philadelphia $tike ed her ter cape and spread It out on
toll.
the back of her chair. She said nothh
Hwtoral Canxed.
"As I understand It," remarked the
ran the rocession disappeared
stranger,p np
over the hill, "the coroner's- jury re-
turned a verdlct of death from natural
causes,"
"Yes," repliedRattlesnake Pete, ",yore
see, he wits naturally slow,' and so nue
slower with his gun than the other fel-
low, which made it very easy to get
a quick verdict." --Colorado Sprint
GaYetter