The Exeter Advocate, 1897-7-1, Page 3a II
ZETAS THE LAWYER.
REV. DR. TALMAGE PAYS A HIGH
TRIBUTE TO THE BAR.
He Treats the Profession of Law From a.
Moral it ad Religious Standpoint—Duties
of the Christian Lawyer-.11Iany Tempta-
tions.
Washington, June 27.—Dr. Talmage's
semen to -day has a special interest for
lawyers, and all who expect to be " law-
yers,, and all who are the friends of
lawyers, His text is Titus iii, 13, "Bring
•Zenas the lawyer,'-;•
The profession of the law is here intro-
duced; and within two days in the Capi-
tal City 303 young menjoined it, and
at this season in various parts of the
land Ther hundreds are taking their di-
plomas for that. •illustrious profession,
and is it not appropriate that I address
such young men from a moral and re-
ligious standpoint, as upon them are now
rolling the responsibilities of that calling
represeuted in the text by Zenas the
lawyer?
We all admire the heroin and rigous
side of. Paul's nature, as when he stands
coolly deliberate on the deok of the corn -
ship while the jack tars of the Mediter-
ranean aro cowering in the cyclone; as
when he stands undauned amid the mar-.
blos of the palace before think necked
Nero, surrounded with his 12 cruel lio-
tors; as when wo .find him earning his
livelihood with his own needle, sowing
hairoloth and preaching tho gospel in the
interstices; as when we find hila able to
take the 39 lashes, every stroke of which
fetched the blood, yet ebutinuing in his
missionary work; as when we find him,
regardless of the consequence to himself,
delivering a temperance lecture to Felix,
the govornnient inebriate. But some-
times we catch a glimpse of the mild and
genial side of Paul's nature. It seems
that he had a friend who was a barrister
by profession. His name was Zenas, : and
he wanted to see him. Perhaps he had
formed the acquaintance of this lawyer
in the courtroom. Perhaps sometimes
when he wanted to ask some question
In regard to Roman law he went to this
Zenas the lawyer. At any rate he had a
warns attachment for the man,and he
provides for his comfortable escort and
entertainment as he writes to Titus,
"Bring Zenas the lawyer."
This manof my text belonged to a
profession in whioh are many ardent sup-
porters of Christ and the gospel, among
them Blackstone, the great commentator
on English law, and Wilberforce, the
emancipator, and the late Benjamin F.
Butler, attorney -general of New York,
and tbe late Charles. Chauncey, the lead-
er of the Philadelphia bar, and Chief
Justices Marshall and Tenterden and
Campbell and Sir Thomas More, who
died for the truth on the scaffold, saying
to his aghast executioner: "Pluck up
courage, man, and do your duty. My
neck is very short. Bo careful therefore,
and do not strike awry."
.A. Mighty Plea.
Among the mightiest pleas that ever
have been made by tongue of barrister
have been pleas in behalf of the Bible
and Christianity, as when Daniel Web-
ster stonel in the supreme court at Wash-
ington pleading in the fatuous Girard
will ease, denounoing any attempt to
educate the people without giving them
at the same time moral sentiment as
"low, *aid and vulgar deism aud.
fidelity' ; e when Samuel L. Southard of
New Jersey, the leader of the forum in
is
�_t+ Say; til,'fipci'mu Cee1,.,.�Lorzn at Prince-
ton college commencement advocating
the literary excellency of the Scriptures;
as when Edmund Burke, in the famous
trial of Warren Hastings, not only in be-
half of the English government, but In
behalf of elevated morals, closed his.
speech in the midst' of the most august
assemblage ever gathered in Westminster
hall by saying: "I impeach Warren Hast-
ings in the name of the House of Com-
nions, whose national character he has
dishonored; I impeach him in the name
of the people of India, whose rights and
liberties he has subverted: I impeach
him in the name of human nature,
which he has disgraced. In the name of
both sexes, 'and of every rank, and of
every station, and of every situation in.
the world, I impeach Warren Hastings."
Yet, notwithstanding all the pleas
which that profession has made in be-
balf of God, and the church, and the
gospel, and the rights of man, there has
come down through the generations
among inany people an absurd and
wicked prejudice against it. So long ago
as in the time of Oliver Cromwell it was
decided that lawyers might not enter
the parliament house as -members, and
they were palled "sons of Zeruiah." The
learned Dr. Johnson wrote an epitaph
for one of them in these words:—
God works wonders now and then.
Here lies a lawyer, an honest matt!
Two hundred years ago a treatise was
issued with the title, "Doomsday Ap-
proaching -With Thunder and Lightning
For Lawyers." A prominent clergyman
of the last century wrote in regard to
that profession these words: "There is a
society of men among us bred up from
their youth in the art of proving, accord-
ing as they are paid, by words multi-
plied for the purpose that white is black
and. black is white. 'For example, if my
neighbor has a mind to my cow, ho hires
a lawyer to prove that he ought to have
my cow from me. I must hire another
lawyer to defend my right, it being
against ct1l rules of law that a man
should speak for himself. In pleading
they do not dwell upon the merits of the
cause, but upon circumstances foreign
thereto. For instance, they do not take
the shortest method to know what title
my adversary has to my cow, but
whether th e, ecosy be red or black, her
fl 1Yi55 len; or short, or the like. After
that they adjourn the cause from time
to time and in 20 years they come to an.
issue. This society likewise has a peculiar
cant or jargon of their own, in which
all their laws are written, aocl those
they take especial care to multiply,
whereby they have so confounded truth
and falsehood that it will take 12 years
to decide whether the field left to me by
my ancestors for six generations belongs
to mo or to one 800 -miles off."
I say these things to show you that
there has been a prejudice going on down
against that profession from generation
to generation. I account for it on the
ground that they compel men to pay
debts ,that they do not want .to pay, and
that they arraign criminals who want
to escape the consequences of their crime,
and as long as that is •so, and it always
will be so, just so long there will be
classes of nen who will affect at any
rate to despise the legal profession. I
know not how it is in other countries,
but I have had long and wide acquaint-
ance with men of that profession—I have
found them in all my parishes, I tarried
in one of their offices for three years, where
there came real estate lawyers, insurance
lawyers, criminal lawyers, marine law-
yere—and I have yet to find a class of
men more gonial ormore straightfor-
ward. There are in that occupation, as
in all our occupations, men utterly ob-
noxious to God and man. But if I were
on trial for my integrity or my life, and
I wanted eon handed justice adminis-
tered to me, I would rather have my
case submitted to a jury of 12 lawyers
than to a jury of 12 clergymen. The
legal profession, I believe, has less vio-
lence of prejudice than is to be found in
the sacred calling.
Temptations..
There is, however, no man who has
more temptations or graver responsibili-
ties than the barrister, and he who at-
tempts to discharge the duties of his
position with only earthly resources is
making a very great mistake. Witness
the scores of men who have in that pro-
fession made eternal shipwreck. Witness
the man who, • with the law of the land
under their arm, have violated every
statute of the eternal God. Witness the
men who have argued placidly before
earthly tribunals, who shall shiver in
dismay before the Judge of quick and
dead. Witness Lord Thurlow announc-
ing his loyalty to earthly government in
the sentence, "If I forget my earthly
sovereign, may God forget me," and yet
stooping to unaccountable • meannesses.
Witness Lord Coko, the learned and the
reckless. Witness Sir George McKenzie,
the execrated of all Scotch Covenanters,
so that until this clay, in Gray Friars'
ohurobyard, Edinburgh, the children
whistle through the bars of tho tomb.
crying:—
Bloody Mackenzie, come outif you deur.
Lift the sneak and draw the bar.
No other profession more needs the
grace of God to deliver them in their
trials, to sustain them in the disoharge
of their duty. While I would have you
briag the merchant to Christ, and while
I would have you bring the farmer to
Christ, and while I would have you
bring the mechanic to Christ,I address
you now in the words of Paul to Titus,
"Bring Zenas the lawyer." By so much
as his duties are delicate and great, by,
so much does he need Christian stimulus
and safeguard. We all become clients, I
do not suppose there is a man 50 years
of age who has been in active life who
has not been afflicted with a lawsuit.
Your name is assaulted, and you must
have legal protection. Your boundary
line is invaded, and the courts must re-
establish it. Your patent is infringed
upon, and you must make the offending
(Manufacturer pay the penalty. Your
treasures are taken, and the thief must
he apprehended. You want to make
your will and you do not want to follow
the example of those who, for the sake
of saving 8100 from an attorney, imperil
8250,000, and keep the generation for
20 years quarrelingabout the estate,
until it is all exhausted. You aro struck
at by an assassin, and you must invoke
for him the penitentiary. All classes of
persons in course of time become clients,
and therefore they aro all interested in
the morality and the Christian integrity
of the legal profssion. "Bring Zenas the
lawyer,"
Treatment of Clients.
But how is an attorney to decide as to
what are the principles by which he
should conduct himself in regard to his
clients? On one extreme Lord Brougham
will appear, saying: "The innocence or.
guilt of your client is nothing to you.
You are to save your client regardless of
the torment, the suffering, the destruc-
tion of all others. You aro to know but
one man in the world—your client. You
are to save him though you should bring
your country into confusion. At all haz-
ards you must save your client." So says
Lord Brougham. But no right minded
lawyer could adopt that sentiment. On
the other extreme Cicero will come to
you and say, "You must never plead the
cause of a bad man," forgetful of the
fade that the greatest villain on earth
ought to have a fair trial and that an
attorney cannot be judge and advocate
at the same time. It was grand when
Lord Erskine sacrificed his attorney gen-
eralship for the sake of defending
Thomas Paine in his publication of his
book called "The Rights of Man," while
at the same time he, the advocate, ab-
horred Thomas Paine's irreligious senti-
ments. Between those two opposite
theories of what is right, what shall the
attorney do? God alone can direct hien.
To that chancery he must be appellant,
and he will get an answer in an hour.
Blessed is that attorney between whose
office and the throne of God there is per-
petual, reverential and prayerful com-
munication. That attorney will never
make an irreparable mistake. True to
the habits of your profession you say
"Cite us some authority on the subject."
Well, I quote to you the decision of the
supreme court of heaven, "If any lack
wisdom, let bins ask of God, who giveth
to all men liberally and upbraideth not,
and it shall be given him."
What a scene is the office of a busy at-
torney! In addition to the anon who come
to you from right motives, bad men will
come to you. They will offer you a large
fee for counsel in the wrong direction.
They want to know from you how they
can escape from solemn martial obliga-
tion. They Gonne to you wanting to know
how they can make the insurance com-
pany pay for a destroyed house which
they burned down with their own hands,
or they come to you on the simple errand
of wanting to escape payment of their
honest debts.
Now, it is no easy thing to advise set-
tlement, when by urging litigation you
could strike a mine of remuneration. It
is not a very easy thing to dampen the
ardor of an inflamed contestant, when
you know through a prolonged lawsuit
you could get from him whatever you
asked. it is no easy thing to attempt to
discourage the suit for the breaking of a
will in the surrogate's court because you
know the testator was of sound mind
andbody when he signed the document,
It requires no small heroism to do as I'
once heard an attorney do in an office
in a western city. I overheard the con-
versation when he said, "John, you can
go on with this lawsuit, and I will see
you through as well as I can, but I want
to tell you before you start that a law-
suit is equal to a fire." Under the tree•
mendous temptations that comp upon the
legal profession there aro scores of men
who have gone clown, and some of them
from being the pride of the highest tri-
bunal of the state have become a disgrace
to.the 'Tombs courtroom. Every attorney,
in addition to the innate sense of right,
wants the sustaining power of the old
fashioned religion of Jesus Christ. "Bring.
Zenas the lawyer."
skepticism.
There are two or three forms of temp-
tation
P
tation to which the legal profession is
especially subject: The first of all is skep-
aa. arat"'"—AISINE
ticism. Controversy is the lifetime busi-
ness .of that occupation. Controversy may
be inoidental or aooidental with us, but
with you it is perpetual. You get soused
to pushing the sharp question "Why?
and making unaided reason superior to
the emotions, that the religion of Jesus
Christ, which is a siinple xnatter of faith
and above human reason, although not
contrary to it, has but little chance with
some of you. A brilliant orator wrote a
book on the first page of whioh he an-
nounced this sentiment, "An honest God
is the noblest work of man!" Skeptic-
ism is the mightiest temptation of the
legal profession, and that man who can
stand in that profession, resisting all
solicitations to infidelity, and can be as
brave as George Briggs of Massachusetts,
who stepped from the gubernatorial chair
to the missionary convention, to plead
the cause of a dying race;then on his
way home from the convention, on a
.cold day, took off his warm cloak and
threw it over ' the shoulders of a thinly
clad missionary,. saying, "Take that and
wear it; it will do you more good than
it will me," or, like Judge John
MoLean„ who can step from the supreme
court room of the United States on to
the anniversary platform of the American
Sunday School union, its most powerful
orator, deserves congratulation and en-
comium. Oh, men of the legal profession,
let me beg of you to quit asking ques-
tions in regard to religion and 'begin be
!loving i
The mighty men of your profession,
Story and Pent and Mansfield, became
Christians, not through their heads, but
through their hearts. "Except ye become
as a little child, ye shall in no wise enter
the kingdom of God." If you do not
become a Christian, 0 man of the legal
profession, until you :can reason this
whole thing out in regard to God and
Christ and the immortality of the soul
you will never become a Christian at all.
Only believe, "Brim Zenas the lawyer."
Sabbath P.reakinc.
Another mighty temptation for the
legal profession is Sabbath breaking.
The trial has been going on for 10 or 15
days. The evidence is all in. Itis Satur-
day night. The judge's gavel falls on the
desk, and he says, "Crier, adjourn the
court until 10 o'clock Monday morning."
On Monday morning the counselor is to
sum up the ease. Thousands of dollars,
yea, the reputation and life of his olient
may depend upon the success of his plea.
How will he spend the intervening Sun-
day? There is not one lawyer out of a
hundred that can withstand the tempta-
tion to break the Lord's day under snob
circumstances, and yet if he does he,
hurts his own soul. What, my brother,
you cannot do before 12 o'clock Saturday
night or after 12 o'clock Sunday night
God does not want you to do at all. Be-
sides that, you want the 24 hours of Sab-
bath rest to give you that electrical and
magnetic force which will be worth
more to you before the jury than all the
elaboration of your case on the sacred
day. My intimate and lamented friend,
the late .fudge Neilson. in his interesting
reminiscences of Rufus Choate, says that
during the last case that gentleman tried
in New York the court adjourned from
Friday until Monday on account of the
illness of Mr.. Choate. But the chronicler
says that on the intervening Sabbath he
saw Mr. Choate in the old brick church
listening to the Rev. Dr. Gardiner
Springer. I do not know whether on the
following clay Rufus Choate won his
cause or lost it, but I do know that his
Sabbathrest did not do him any harm.
Every lawyer is entitled to one day's rest
out of seven. If he surrenders that, he
robs three -God, his own soul and his
client. Lord. Castlereagh and Sir TJiomas
Romil]y were the leaders of the bar in
their day. They both died suicides. Wil-
. berforce accounts for their aberration of
intellect on the ground that they were
unintermittent in their work and they
never rested on Sunday. "Poor fellow 1"
said Wilberforce in regard to Castlereagh;
"poor fellow, it was nonobservance of the
Sabbath." Chief Justice Hale says,
"When I do not properly keep the Lord's
day, all the rest of the week is unhappy
and unsuccessful in my worldly employ-
ment."
I quote to -day from the highest statute
book in the universe, "Remember` the
Sabbath day to keep it holy." The legal
gentleman who breaks that statute may
seem for awhile to be advantaged, but in
the long run the men who observe this
law of God will have larger retainers,
vaster influence, greater professional suc-
cess than those men who break the
statute. Observance of the law of God
pays not only spiritually and eternally,
but it pays in hard dollars or bank bills.
Another powerful temptation of the
legal profession is to artificial stimulus.
No one except those who have addressed
audiences knows about ' the nervous ex-
haustion that sometimes comes afterward.
The temptation of strong drink ap-
proaches the legal profession at that very
point. Then, a trial cooling on. Through
the ill -ventilated courtroom the barris-
ter's health has been depressed for days
and for weeks. He wants to rally his en
orgy. He is tempted to resort to artificial
stimulus. It is either to get himself up
or let himself down that this temptation
comes upon him. The flower of the
American bas, ruined in reputation and
ruined in estate, said in his last mo-
ments: "This is the end. I am dying on
a borrowed bed, covered with a borrowed
sheet, in a house built by public charity.
Bury me under that tree in the middle of
the field, that I may not be crowded. I
always have been crowded."
The Great Future.
Another powerful temptation of the
legal profession is to allow the absorb-
ing duties of the.profossion to shut out
thoughts of the great future. You know
very well that you who have so often
tried others will after awhile be put on
trial yourselves. Death will serve on you
a writ of ejectment, and you will be put
off these earthly premises. On that day
all the affairs of your life will be presented
in a "bill of particulars." No certiorari
from a higher court, for this is the high-
est court. The day when Lord Exeter was
tried for 'high treason; the day when the
House of Commons inovod for the im-
peachment of Lord Levet; the days when
Charles I and Queen Caroline were put
upon trial; the clay when Robert Emmet
was arraigned as an insurgent; the day
when Blennerhasset was brought into the
courtroom because he had tried to over-
throw the United States government,
and all the other great trials of the world
are nothing compared with the groat
trial in which you and I shall appear,
summoned before the Judge of quick and
dead. •
There will be no pleading there "the
statute of limitations," no "turning
state's evidence," trying to got off our-
selves while others suffer, on "moving
for a non•suit." The case will come on
inexorably, and we shall be tried. You,
niy brother, who have so often been ad
vnoate for others, will then need an ad -
THE FEN COLS MINING AND MILLING COMPANY,
LIMITED LIABILITY.
/�{
HEAD .OF'F'ICE: VANCOUVER, B.C.
CAPITAL $200.000 -
- In 800,000 Shares of 25c. each,
DIRECTORS :
F. O. TNNES, President and Managing Director.
ROET.. G. TATLOW, Vice -President.
S.'0. RIORARDS, Director.
O. O. BENNETT, Secretary.
THE FERN is a well developed Mine WITH ENOUGH ORE NOW IN SIGHT TO SUPPLY A 10.•
STAMP MILL FOR, TWO YEARS.
The value of this ore has been ascertained by milling and smelting quantities in a practical manner, and it ruins
from 810.00 to 8300 per ton.
FIVE TONS, taken from an open cut on the surface, and Milled at the Poorman Mill near NE SON .G V
A RETURN flF $81.00 PER TON IN FREE GOLD, AND SHOWED A VALUE OP $50.00 PER TOW
IN CONCENTRATES, MAKING A TOTAL VALUE OF $111.00 PER TON.
The tunnel at main level, which is 'n 400 FEET, on ledge, out this same rich ore at a depth of about 160
FEET below the serface, and now SHOWS CONTINUOUg RIGH ORE FOR ONE HUNDRED FEET, whiooi
runs from 832.00 TO OVER 8900.00 per ton.
THE MINE IS PROVEN TO A DEPTH OF OVER 225 FEET.
THE PROFITN ORE NOW IN SIGHT SHOULD BE SUFFICIENT TO PAY TWICE THE DAPI-
TAL OF THE COMPANY.
Among the reports; on this property, embodied in the Prospectus, is one from th8 well-known Mining Engineer,
JOHN E. HARDMAN, S. B., who speaks most highly of the company's prospects.
800,000 shares of the stock have been subscribed for by an underwriting syndicate, which glarantees all tjee catsle
required by the Company, and arrangements are now being made to equip the Mine with a 16 -Stamp' Mill, whldh it is
'hoped will be in running order in August.
ONLY 100,000 SHARES WILL BE OFFERED TO THE PUBLIC at par, and a large dumber of these
have already been applied for.
The Prospectus contains full information, and will be furnished on application to the Brokers.
BRO1OERS
F. C. INNES, GEO. W. HAMILTON & SON,
Vancouver, B. C. 24 San Sacramento St., Montreal, P. Q
a-
vocado for yourself. Have you selected
him, the Lord Chancellor of the Uni-
verse? If any man sin, we have an ad
vocate—Jesus Christ the righteous. It is
uncertain when your case will be called
on. "Be ye also ready."
Lord. Ashburton and Mr. Wallace were
leading barristers in their day. They
died about the same time. A few months
before their decease they happened to be
In, the same hotel In a village, the one
counsel going to Devonshire, the other
going to London. They _ had both been
seized upon by a disease which they knew
would be fatal, and they requested that
they, bo carried into the same room and
laid down on sofas side by side that they
might talk over old times • and talk over
the future. So they were carried in, and
lying there on opposite sofas they talked
over their old contests at the bar, and
when they talked of the future world,
upon which they must soon enter. It was
said to have been a very affecting and
solemn interview between Mr. Wallace
and Lord Ashburton. My subject to -day
puts you side by side with those not in
your profession who have departed this
life, some of them skeptical and rebel-
lious, some of them penitent, childlike
and Christian. Those were wandering
stars for whom is reserved the blackness
of darkness forever, while these others
went up from the courtroom of earth to
the throne of eternal dominion. Through
Christ the advocate these got glorious
acquittal, In the other case it was a
hopeless lawsuit --an unpardoned sinner
versus the Lord God Almighty. Oh,
what disastrous litigation! Behold, he
comes! The Judge, the Judge, the clouds
of heaven, the judicial ermine, the great
white throne, the judicial bench, the
arohangel's voice that shall wake the
dead, the crier, "Como, ye blessed; de-
part ye nursed!" the acquttial or the
condemnation. "And I saw the dead,
small and great, stand before God, and
the books were opened."
A Evorbloomiug Plant.
The new hardy climbing rose now be-
ing introduced under the name of Em-
press of China seems to be a really valu-
able novelty, It is readily established
and grows very rapidly; its foliage is
dense, graceful and of a rich green color.
The plant begins to bloom the first sea-
son, and continues to grow and bloom
till after the coming of frosts, and what
is especially commendable is the fact
that it is perfectly hardy. The prairie
roses are excellent climbers and produce
beautiful flowers, but their season is only
for a short period during midsummer.
The climbing hybrid perpetual roses
rarely make a satisfactory growth for a
pillar or wall and bloom but sparingly
during autumn. But here we have a
climbing rose that grows almost as freely
as a prairie rose, blooms continuously
from spring until late in the autumn,
and will endure the winter with perfect
safety and be ready for serivice early in
the spring, enlarging from year to year,
and yielding a display of flowers
throughout the season that elicits praise
and admiration from all observers.
The Empress of China, like other
China roses, is of medium size, but the
petals are rather broad and of good sub-
stance, and when full blown the form is
moderately full and the fragrance emit-
ted is deliciously sweet. The buds are
gracefully pointed and of a bright oar -
mine rose color. As they develop, how-
ever, they change to the beautiful rosy
white whioh is so much admired in the
lovely apple bloom. For the buttonhole
the half open bud with a spray of the
foliage is exquisite, and for a modest
hand boquet the vigorous clusters of buds
and flowers, with their accompanying
foliage, are all that could be desired.
"Grows like a morning glory and is as
hardy as a grapevine," writes one enthu-
siastic florist. His enthusiasm may have
carried his description too far, but this
new climbing rose is evidently one of
more than passing merit, and deserves
the attention of all who wish an ever
blooming, hardy climbing rose.—Wo-
man's. Rome Companion.
Borneo Marriages.
Tlie marriage ceremony practiced by
the people of Borneo is short and sim-
ple. Bride and groom are brought be-
fore the assembled tribe with great so-
lemnity and seated side by side. A betel
nut -is then cut in two by the medicine
woman of the tribe, and ono half is
given to the bride and the other half to
the groom, They begin to chew the nut,
and then the old woman, after some
sort of incantation, knocks their beads
together, and they are . declared masa
and wife.
Tried to Catch Her.
The,lawye was pressing a question
urgently when she said, with fire flash-
ing from her eyes: "You needn't think
to catch me, sir. You tried that once
before."
"Madam," replied the learned one, "I
haven't tho slightest desire to catch you,.
and your husband looks as if he was
sorry he did."
LEB WHITE'S SON SAM
HE WAS THE MOST CANTANKEROUS
MORTAL THAT EVER LIVED.
The Old Man's Tale of His Had Freaks
and Mishaps—Once He Tried to "Whop
His Pop" — Sad Details of Sam s Adven-
ture With a Bull.
"Speakin about cantankerous critters,"
said old Zeb White as we sat together one
evening, "I reckon my son Sam, who
died five y'ars ago, was about the roust.
That boy bad a powerful good beam in
him as a gineral thing, but thar was days
when tbe devil seemed to hev possession
of him. It wasn't no good to switch biro,
and when he was outer sorts it wasn't no
good to argy with hien. He was 15 y'ars
old when I cum home from the wah, and
his head was swelled up big 'nuff fur a
man of fo'ty. Be finally got so that he
felt like rubbin up ag'in me. I was at
work in the garden one day when he minis
home froni the Co'ners a-spittin right and
Mt, and binioby he coins out to me and
sez:
" 'Pop, mehbe yo' calls yo'self the best
tam on this yere mounting.'
" Mebbe T do,' sez I, as I looks at him
outer my left eye.
" `But yo' ain't, though, and I kin
prove it.'
" 'Then who is?'
" 'He stands right yere befo' yo', and
his cognomen ar' Sam White. Dad, I'm
goin to whop yo'
"" 'Better go inter the house, boy, and
bey yo'r mother gin yo' sum bread and
butter and 'losses on it.'
"But that boy had the wust kind o'
well head," said the old. man, "and he
was airnest in thinkin he could whop his
pop. He gits nigher and nigher, and
biineby he sails fur me. I knowed what
was corrin, and befo' he could wink twice
1 flopped him . on his back and then
whopped him till he hollered fur meroy.
He lived fur two y'ars arter that,but he
iidn't try that game on me no inn'. One
!sty ho was down to Bristol, and thar was
circus in town. We went in, and as we
,vas lookin at the animals one of the lions
lies down, with his tail stiekin through
the bars of. the cage. I seen Sam a-grin-
nin, and I sez:
" 'Young man, don't yo' go and make
no fool of yo'rself with that lion t'
`I'm gwine to pinch that tail,' sez he.
" 'What's the use?'
" 'I've heard as how they were made o'
leather and had no feelin in 'em, and I'm
goin to see about it.'
"I didn't say nothin mo', kase I knowed
Sam was bound to have his way if it bust-
ed him. Be gits esus to the cage and grabs
that tail and gives it a pinch and a twist
and then hangs on to it with all his might.
The lion jumps up with a roar fit to shako
the hills, ant' in about a ininit that bull
menagerie was upset and the circus folks
u -pilin on to Sam. One of the older lions
in the cage clawed him across the hand,
a dog bit hint in the leg, and them circus
folks whopped him till he didn't git outer
bed fur six weeks. He was in to all jest
slab scrapes as that, and the wonder was
that he lived as long as he did. Tho older
he growed the um' cantankerous he got,
and one day the ole woman CUM to me
jth tears in her eyes and sez:
" 'Zeb White, Sara's a-gittin wusser
and wusser all the time, and I'm almost
hopin the Lawd will take . him away '
" 'Tho Lawd couldn't manage him if
he did git him,' sez I.
" `Diebbo ho could. Mobbe he's got a
pon up thar in heaven to put Sain into
red keep him till he's bin made over.
I'm goin to dye my shawl black and fix
up a mournin bonnet, fur that boy o' ours
will be .brung home dead befo' he's a
month older.'
"Waal, so he was—so he was," said the
old man, with a touch of pathos in his
voice. "Ile was down to the Co'ners one
clay to blow and brag with the crowd.
a-hangin out than in them days, when a
man cams ridin up on a mewl to say that
Bill Clark's bull had broken out o' the
field and was corrin up the road. That
bull was a big 'un and hooked two bosses
to death. As the man was givin the
alarm the bull showed up down the road.
He was pawin up the airth and inakin the
heavens quake with his beller, and sioh
.Is had bosses tied up was mighty spry to
sot 'em loose and git '0111 away. Nobody
iidn't propose to git' in the way of that
bull and take chances -nobody but any
son Sam. It was a chance fur him to
show off, and he riz up and yelled:
"'This is the day I hev bin livin furl
I'll go fo'th and take that bull by the
borne and flop him on his back.'
"The risen tried to argy with Sam, but
be was sot, and, pullin off his coat and
flingin down his hat, he walked out and
begins to paw and bailor, same as the
bull. The oritter stops to look at him and
Cur a minit or two be must hev wondered
what it was. Then bis eyes began to
glare and his tail stand out, and the crowd
bollerod to Sam to git over the fence. He
clever minded 'em, but with a roar and a
beller he run in on the bull."
"And what happened?" I asked, as
the old man nansefi.
"Jest what might hev' bin looked fur,"
be replied. "Sam was tossed 20 feet at the
fust go off, and when that bull gat through
with him thar wasn't much left to bury.
A man emus up to break the news tows.
I wasn't home, and he sez to the ole worn-
An:
" 'Mrs. White, ar' yo'r son Sam home
today?'
" 'He ain't,' says she.
" `And do yo' know why he ain't?'
" 'Not exactly, but I reckon it's kase
he's sumwhar else,'
'That's right, Mrs. White—perfeokiy
right and proper. Yo'r son Sam ain't
acme and ain't comm home, kase he's got
bizness up thar in the land a' angels and
golden streets which will detain him fur
rum time.' " M. Quer,.
Horribly Handicapped.
"The Eardcash girls have relinquished
ibeir ambition to be society leaders."
"Tired of it already?"
"No, but they couldn't get their father
And mother to say 'eyther' and'neyther.' "
—Chicago Times -Herald.
Parental Wisdom.
"Papa, how do the people in the weather
bureau And out what kind of weather we
Are going to have?"
"I didn't know that they did, my son."
—Yonkers Statesman.
.A Contingency.
Flounder—Do you believe in fate?
Rounder (shuffling)—Depends on who
dealing.—New York Journal.
Accomplished.
She le an expert =her wheel,
Although she's had it but a week,
For she can ride, and all the time
She talks a bright and steady streak.
Cinoinl:ati Commercial Tribune
The Latest Popular Music
For 10 cents a Copy..
This music, regularly sold at 40 and
50 cents, we will send postpaid to any
address on receipt of 10 cents per copy,
or 12 pieces for 51.00.
Vocal.
The bridegroom • that never came,
Davis 10
All for you Burke 10
Don't forget your promise. . , . Osborne 10
He took it in a quiet,. good-
natured way (comic)... • .... David 10
There will came a tineHarris 10
Don't tell her you love her. ... Dresser 10
Star light, star bright Herbert 10
You are not the only pebble on the •
beaeh Carter 10
Lucinda's Jubilee (negr:i)...Berlinger 10
Cause ma baby loves ale . ,'Wilson 10
Dar'il be a nigger niissia' .Bloom 10
Words cannot tell my love_.Stahl 1a
The girl you dream about .. Stahl 1e
Hide behind the door when papa
cine, Collin Coe 10
I loved you better than you knew
.Carroll 10
I love you if others don'tBlenford 10
Don't send her away,John,Bosenfeld 10
She may have seen better days
Thornton 10
When the girl you levels many miles
away Kipper 10
Ben Bolt, English ballad 10
tweet bunch of daisies .Owen 10
the wearing of the green, Irish
national song 10
Instrtunental.
Royal Jubilee waltzes Imp. Music Co. 10
Wheeling Girl two-step Imp.Musie Co. 10
El Capitan march and two-step. Sousa 10
20th Century Woman two-step, ,Norris 10
A story ever sweet and true.... Stuitz 10
Murphy on parade, the latest hit, Jansen 10
King Cotton march and two-step Sousa 10
Handicap march and two-step, . Rosey 10
Ch000hi Ch000hi polka. Clark 10
Yale maroh and two-step. _Van Baer 10
Black America march.... ...... Zicklo 10
Belle of Chicago two-step Sousa. 10
Star Light, Star Bright waltz .Herbert 10
Nordica waltz .7`ourjee 10
Princess Bonnie waltzSpencer 10
D.K.E waltz Thompson 10
Darbies' Dream caprice. . . , ,Lancing 10
Daueo of the Brownies caprice Kam -
,man 10
Rastas on Parade two-step • Mills 10
G ender. on two-step .... Ianp. Music Co. 10
Narcissus (clasaieal)" Nevin 10
In the Lead two-step Bailey 10
Semper Fidelis March , „Sousa 10
Thunderer march.. --Sousa 10
Washington Post march.. ,Sousa 10
High School Cadets maroh...,.Sousa 10
.Liberty Bell march Sousa 10
:Manhattan Beach march. ,Sousa 10
Love comes like a summer sigh 10
NOTICE—We sell only for cash, and
payment must accompany all orders.
We publish only the musio advertised
to our lists. Now pieces issued weekly.
Address all money and correspondence
EMPIRE MUSIC CO'Y,
44 Bay St., Toronto..
t1.