The Exeter Advocate, 1890-1-16, Page 6A /fdicileint ticitrnnitati A TEEMEL REANINO TO."
rtO Was up lu Mathematics had ittitafef0V11Y40"
FlOtlee, au& mould talk &omit initmuonay
iirern Arlstarebuti down:
Ile could tell what Mimeo( beaus wore devoured
by the °headmen end he knew the date of
ovary joke made by a MMus clown,
Ffelwas 'stalled in evolution -and woold instance
the poor 'Russian as a type of despotis1fl in
the modern age of man ;
Be could write a page of matter ou the different
hinds of batter used in making flinty gim-
cracks on the modern cooking plan,
lIe could revel in statistics, he was well up in the
Bade% knew the pedigree of horses dating
way back from the ark
ritx and wide his tips were quoted and his base-
ball stuff was noted In pelttical predtc,
eons he wonld always hit the mark.
ge could write upon the tariff, and he didn't
seem to care if he was called of to review
a book or write a poem or two;
/le could boil down stuff and edit, knew the
value of a credit, and could bustle with the
telegraph in Eityle excelled by few.
Be could tell just how a fire should be handled;
as a liar be wa- sure to tummies a wide dis-
criminative taste;
lie was nuld and yet undaunted, and no matter
what was wants- d ha was always sure to ges
it first, yet never was in haste.
But despite his reputation as a brainy. aggrega-
tion, he WM m
known to be defient in a
manner to provoke,
For no matter when you met him ho would
borrow if you let him, Ilnd he seemed to
have the faculty of always beins broke.
--Journalist.
swam or Irate "IP Go's."
tear& or Wisdom ter Women or the
Household.
It is 'rather strange, when you come to
think of it, how many little things are
4‘ let go" in the house, that really fret the
himates and add friction to the household
michinery, whioh should run smoothly.
Moot of these "let go's" are in the kitchen.
I might philosophize cabout that feat, but I
will not, jest now. A. dull vegetable knife
is one of these. The kitchen which con-
teinen sharp one is the exception, yet it is
very exasperating to peel potatoes or apples;
ant up beans, or slice tarnips, with a knife
c. sa dull as a
In the first place, one lbegtudges the
money for a fine steel knife "just to pare
potatoes with," never stopping to think
that the better the knife the cheaper it is
for tlais sort of work. A sharp knife will
pare thinner and waste leas than a dull
etneeand will last longer. A good, email
whet-stona should accompany it, with
instruotions to nse it, and not the stove.
pipe, etove-edge or sole of the cook's
shoe. There is an old saying that one
of the few questions the devil cannot
answer is: "What is a woman's whet-
stone 2"
Another annoyanee is leaking tins of
variona kinds, notably, quart memo:tree,
dippers, dripping -pans and saucepans.
Bits of rag drawn through the tiny holes,
Or flour -paste rubbed on the bottom to
form a patch, are common devices for
getting along with these let -go tins, in-
stead of carrying them to the nearest tin
atop some morning and getting them back
whole and etrong in the afternoon for a,
very smell oatlay of time end money
There is for sole, and I doubt not it is
quite commonly used, a certain kind of
solder that the dealers claim can easily be
need at home. I think I bought eome once,
• but was not very suomesfal in using it, pro-
bably from lack or skill. 11111 no wey les-
sened my ocinviotion that tine should not
be allowed to continue leaky, when time or
service has made them so.
A clothes wringer that will not wring is
tether annoyence. Perhaps one of the
rollere will not turn. We oil the gearing
and 11180 with it week atter week, on wash-
day, and forget it the other days, all the
time vaguely hoping it is only a
"conniption fit," and the matter will
"right itself," if only we wait long enough.
It does not "right itself," and so the annoy-
ance continues, the clothes are
half -wrung or wrung by hand, when it
would be so easy to drop a postal to the
man who repairs wringers, and then have
this cease to be a
Dalt soissors—who does not know them?
Day after day some people " saw away "
with such a pair, working their jewel mean-
while, and getting a "pain in their tem-
pers," all because thia is one of the " let-
go's " that has grown to be chronic.• Isn't
• it queer? Why 10 it so ? I only know it
is, and that I rarely have a friend who
visits me and uses my scissors fail to say,
'" Why, how nice and sharp your scissors
are 1' Also, I never go anywhere, taking
my work, witlaont being very sure my
•scissors are with it, because I know what I
will meet, nine times out of ten, if I borrow
Scissors.
Another " let -go" has a connection with
tidies. Now, tidies are very nice things,
and very saving, to the furniture, if they
tre properly mode and adjusted ; but how
few are 1 Most of them are " everlastingly
gelling off," and all because we fail to sew
On little tapes for tying, or little tapes for
pinning underneath. We mean to each
one of the fifty times we pick them up and
lay them on the sofa or (their; but some -
bow we let it go, and fret ourselves and
ethers by so doing. '
The weekly repairing of garments is
almost a religions duty in some few homes;
but in how many are the little rents and
rips, the !oat buttons and hooes,the broken
buttonholes and worn edges, and the tiny
• holes and thin places in hosiery let go from
time to time until nothing remains to be
Zone hat throw aside the garments. " The
Stitch in time eaves nine"remark may be
trite, but it Is just as good as, ever, and
when I find a home where mending is one
pf the," let-go's " I feel very sure there is a
sea lack of thrift, and so of certain moral
qnalities that go with it,—Good Housekeep-
ing.
•
An Operation Rarely Reilerted to and
Fraught with Considerable Danger. ,
THE PEeIele OP A tit an ON THE
The operation of " heaving to," per-
formed by nearly every Bailing vessel
()aught on the coast during the reoentt
storm, is never resorted to by merchant
vemels until it beocnnes abeolutely neces-
sary. The moment a vessel is ',hove to,"
pays the New York Mien ehe he0013109
practioally stationary, the object being
naerely to keep her "head to the seas.'
Among the many vessels caught outside
during ;he gale was every type of oreft
know to "keep :water voyages." There
were East Indie olippere, 'West Incitan
brigs, barques, barquentines and schoenen,
and a few eteamers.
Many of the East Indian pockets had
been ont over 120 days. For enemy days
prior to the storm the sky had been over -
oast. Only 000sedemally would the sun
appear, and then for so short a time es to
render even a catch " sight " well nigh out
of the question. In coneequence many
ships had been nutmeg by " dead reokon-
ing," maleing the eapposed position of the
vessel a most uncertain one.
Under such conditions were vessels over-
taken by the terrible northeaster. Wind
and sea aided each other in makingnevigation perilouB. tbe sem threatening at
every moment to roll over on the decks of
the fleeing yeesels. Some craft, perhaps
better able to etand the sewn held on, steer.
ing on a supposed true course for port. In
laying off this coarse the base has been
taken from a eupposed true position of the
ship: Instead of citing the entrence the
lookout is heard calliog : " .F3reekers
ahead 1" To one unacquainted with a sea
faring life the horror whioh accompanies
such a sound beggars description. Let it
be night time and the horror la increased.
There is but one thing to do, and that
quidele—to call " A.Il heeds save ship 1"
The vessel is in a lee shore, the pie is
blowing her right on, end unless she can be
made to beat up in the wind, head off, and
clear the Mast, she will beach: Up comes
everybody with -a rush, half tinseled,
half dazed, brit fally alive to the danger.
The moment the Seamen reach the deck
the cutting wind makes Wide awake all,
hands.
"Hand down the helm 1 Let fly the
head -sheets, lee head and main and
weether cross-jeckbracest „Spanker stheet 1".
As fast as the orders fly from the bridge
the men jump to their stations. Round
mines the great ship, and up into the wind.
The head Mils flap with tremendous force,
threatening to fly out of the leach ropes
with every role. Now the spanker is being
hauled a-weether. She feels it, and, as the
stern files off, her head comes right up into
the mass of seething waters.
" Roundin the lee head and unite and
weather tetoss-jeckbraces!" Already the
men are at their placee, and upecome the
weather -yard arms into the wind. The
vessel is now bromiside to the seas. It is
a question. of life and death whether she
will stop. If she but continues to come up
all is well. A drag has been got over'from
forward. To it is bent a hawser leading
through a quarter ,chodt. The drag is
well away from the ship. On to the hawser
jump the crew. Away they go with a rush.
The drag Minter is run right to the bows,
and at the same time the bow comes up
rapidly. . „
• Not a moment too soon. A great sea
the next Meows lifts the ship high into the
air. Had it caught her " broadside to' it
would have plunged tons of green BEM
upon the decks. But the great oraft's bow
has met it.She rose es the wave advanced
and plunged heavily forward a,it rushed
under her.
Now is the time to catch her. Sharp np
go the yards from the head and main. The
head sheets are hauled well aft, the hake
carefully tended, the spanker eased up
slightly; the ship feels thin canvas, small
as the amount on her le; she readies
forward, staggers for a Moment, then
slowly works her way off throtigh sea
after sea. As soon as she is far enongh out
to sea the vessel is brought up into the
wind, off comes the foretopmaat 'staysail,
foresail, foretopsail and spanker. A close
reefed maintopectil and main spencer alone
hold her ap, and all attempt to, fall . off is
counteraoted by the position of the redder.
Should the wpad still contintie to inarease
in violenoe the topsail will be goose -winged.
This latter sail is kept 011 09 long as possi-
ble beoause of its being above the waves.
Under a main spencer alone the ship has
but little opportunity to feel the wind, the
waves serving as a bulwark. Should, how-
ever, a- goose -winged topsail and mein
spencer prove too muoh, tarpaulins placed
in the lee mizzen riggin,g,may hold her up.
If ,she still continues to heel over the crew
will out away the foremast by cutting the
weather laniards. If this will not right
her away will go the mizzen and main, and
then trust to riding oat to a sea anchor.
This alone can ewe the vessel. Let her
once fall off, get into the trough of the see,
and the coneequences will be expressed in
the one word of the seaman, 4' Foundered."
INPUICASVI OF WEALTH.
What Sort or Property 000 the Enormous
Increase Go thaw
At the end of every year there cornea the
queetion ", What has begorae otthe re -
milts of the year's prodootions ? " it is
said that the nation is adding to its wealth
o thousand without:I yearly; in what form?
It is tot in monetary circulation. It isnot
he claims opine* other opuntriee or own-
ership of property there. The crops of
the year we shall presently consume,
or if
part is to be Bold abroad, the geods re -
(wised in exehange will presently be con-
entned. Where is the additional wealth of
whioh we boast Is it only in a higher
valuation of lands and buildiege and other
fixed property—a valuation which may be
lost with the next turn of the wheel?
These qamitioas are not so chitchat% as to
many they may seenen It is of no small
importance to disoover whet form the
added wealth of the nation takes, so that
we may jadge how far it is solid and last-
ing and oepable of reproduction For if all
the landof the °wintry were worth 10,000
millions a, year ago and 11,000 rnillious
now, but eine prodatoe no more than Wore,
the added wealth is thee:finery. Or if
there ties been added within a few years
2,000 millione to the nominal value of rein
road property, without any inoreeee in the
yearly eerniag power, what &tittle,' gain in
wealth is there? '
The -foundation of prosperity is the land,
and every year witnesses an mutual inoreaee
in the nunsber of eons reduced to °taken
tion and productiveness. That (Menge
means increased wealth. From 1870 to
1880 there were added ot improved land
about 96,000,000 acres, or more than 50 per
cent., and there is every reason to believe
that the progress in that respect has been
even more rapid during the past decade.
Bat the addiiien of 15,000,000 sores of
improved land every year involves perms.
neat investment of labor in clearing, fenc-
ing, breaking , and road building, in the
erection of houses and barne, and the pro-
curement of stook and implements and
machinery. The new railroad, which May
not pay a single dollar to owners as yet,
may nevertheless have made Poscible and
profitable this enormous expenditure of
labor in the creation of new farms, and if
the 15,000,000 aores yearly were worth no
more than the [orange of land in 1880, that
alone would repreeent an addition of 400
millions or more to the natioaal wealth
each year, even though nothing 'had been
added to the price of land previously culti-
vated. Bat the completion ot roads and
raidroeds, the settlement of other lands
near by, and the gradual development of a
community, also add largely to the aottial
as well as the nominal value of are farm
property. Within the ignite of influence.
So it le with the dwellings and other
structures in cities and towns. The country
is not worse bat better supplied with all
anoh strnotared than it was ten years ago.
Bat that enterms an, increasemore than
proportieneite to population; and ehe:yearly
addetion of ,1,700,000 inhabitents, even if
there were rue iiitprovementin the condition'
and accommodations of the people, would
by itself require additional inveetment
yearly a 340 millions or more in building.
Property of shat kind contributes as truly
as any other to the wealtkproduoing power
of the country; &Wettings no less than
stores, or warehouses or faotories. Bat in
addition there has been each year an enor-
mous addition to the manntacturing
apart from the bnildinge otherwiee esti.
mated; to the .meohinery in use and its
productive Capacity. It ig not easy
form ereeen an approximate of t of
these additions, bat every one realizes that
they must be large. Moreover, new mines
are constantly opened which add millions
every .year to the prodection ; the new
mines an the Lake Saperior distriet alone,
which have been added within the past five
years, have increased the production more
than 4,000,000 tons eaoh year, in value,
$20,000,000.
Not least among the properties of per-
manent valne is the fruit of inventive ,
genius. ;New ideas are the nation's most
valuable eepital, and the 25,000 patents
whioh may be issued in a year, and may
'epee of real value, cannot be omitted. A
single telephone patent issupposed to be
worth more than e50,000,000. It not only
has stooks selling at about that rate, and
not only earns a liberal return on eneh a
valuation, bat earns it by rendering the
people a service. With the fairness or un-
fairness of the division of benefits between
the company and the public we here have
nothing to do. The aggregate valweto the
whole mantry includes all that an ;elven-
tion is worth to the pablio, tied all that it
is worth to the owners. But in each year's
record of inventions there are rainy .whioh,
if not equally valuable, have in the eame
seam a reel and large value, and add
permanently to the producing power of the
nation. --New York Daily Commercial
Bulletin.
Medals for the Burma Troops.
The Queen has ordered that the grant of
India medal of 1854 with deep inscribed
" Burma 1887 9," shall be extended to all
troops engaged in the 'military operations
in Upper Burma, and those actually en-
gaged in the Sete of service in Lower
Burma between the let of May, 1887, end
the 31st of March, 1889. At bronze medal
. +end clasp of similar pattern is to be issued
all enthorieed Government following who
coOmpanied the troops so engaged. Officers
end men who ahead, wear the India medal,
iecluding those having the clasp "Burma
18135-7," will receive the new clasp only.
A Possibility.
denEiteltateNdi Seen CRIES.
Ministers Itoorly Paid, in comparison With
Other etecareelouel mein
No man who dopts a ministerial oareer
ocin be justly oheaged with meroeuary
motives, for in no ostler profession is the
monetary reward au email. There are, to
be sure, a few instances of preaohers who
are paid large sideline for their services,
but the rank and file ot the clergy receive
hardly enough to maintain then:wolves we
speotably, WI/E0B John P Ritter in " Fronk
Latent:1 Weekly." The average eatery paid
to ministers in Protestant churches ie less
than $1,000 per annum, 'Prominent law-
yers like Joeeph 11. Choate, Robert J.
Ingersoll and teenjemin F. Butler make all
the way from 275,e00 to 2125,000 each year.
Among physicians, Dr. Loomie earns from
e50,000 to e60,000 ; Dr. Polk from e40,000
50,C00;eDr. Sayre about e50,000, and a
dozen more might be named who earn over
05,000 annually. Compared to the
eateries paid the managere a large finan.
dal institutions, the reward of the greatest
preset:Len in the laud eempaltry. The
highest eatery paid a clergyman in New
York la $20,000, and Dr. Jam Hall is the
fortunate mdividuel. There are, perhaps,
lealf-dozen otber preadiere who get
from $10,000 to $15,000, but it should be
remembered that they repesent the weelth.
jest pariehee in the city, and that they
assume ao much responsibility as that
devolving upon the heads of great moneyed
institutions. ' TWA will be apparent when
we regard the (churches under their dine -
tion trom a purely financial standpoint.
Trinity Church coreoration owns millions
upon millions in real estate. its annual
inoonae is nearly $800,000. The bulk ot
thia vase sum is peed out in oharoh work
each year, and Dr. Morgan Dix, the reotor,
presides over ita distribution. Dr. Hales
church has a plant—if this term may be
allowed—valued at $2,000,000. The Su -
come from pew rents and contributions
amounts to nearly $250,000 per annum.
Moat of this is spent in missionary work.
Last year the congregational expenses, in-
cluding the pastor's eatery, the musio and
all incidental items, footed up 035,681t The
balance ot over 6200,000 was applied to
domestio and foreIgn missions, the relief
fund , of the Preabyterian Church and to
miscellaneous celerities. In view of this
remarkable showing, it oannot be doubted
that Dr. Hall earns his salary.
Greece °Minh h*e an endownment of
$250,000. Its property is worth .close to
$2,000,000, and its annual income from pew
mute and toontribmions averages $100,000.
The property of Aeoension Church, Fifth,
avenue and Tenth street, represents ad
investment of $350,000. Its revenue hi
about e50,009 moo year. Si. Thomas'
Church and property is valued at e750,000.
Its pews !done rent for $50,000 each year,
and the contribations amount to from VO,
Am to f10,000 more. St. George's Church
is supported entirely by voluntary con-
tributions. All the pews are free. Dr.
,Reiustord, the rector, gets a nominal
salary of e10,000 per annum. He is pos-
sessed of private maims, however, and re-
turns his salary to the treasury of his
church. The property is valued at over
$500,000, and the yearly revenue is between
l40,000 and $50,000. A large proportton of
this sum is spent in parish charities.
Calvary Church aud property is worth at
least $300.000. Its contributions are very
large, averaging from $70,000 to 680,000.
The total income of the perish is not far
short of 00,000 es year, and 1 ally onethird
of it goes to generaeoharities.
The Univeraity Plaice Presbyterian
'Church is among the wealthiest of that,
denomination. Its church and property .is
valued at about $250,000. Lase year, tts
revenue was not fa hfrocn $70,000. Of this
amount only $15,792 went toward congre-
gational expenses. , This certainly indi-
oittes economical management in its
domestic concerns. •
The Madison Square Presbyterian
Church, where Dr. Charles H. Parkhurst
presides, has an inoome of between $50,000
and l60,000. Its plant is probably worth
$350,000.
, Dr. Pexton's West Presbyterian Church
derived an income last year of over
52,000. The value of its plant has not been
estimated.
Ten large church organizations have
been instanced here, representing a com-
bined property worth millione upon mil.
lions, from whioh a total yearly income is
derived from pew rents and contributions
of about $1,600,000, yet the average salaries
the pastors receive is only a trifle over
$11,000. When it is considered that they
must keep up a style ot living in accord -
since with the dignity of the pulpite they
occupy; beside answering substentielly
innumerable private cells on their charity,
it is not to be eupposed that they can lay
by very ranch money against thetime when
old age will deprive them of their useful-
ness.
Nothing has boon mid so far as to the
personal value of a clergyman to theparish
under his charge. Experience has proved
that the income of a pastorate depends
minty upon the qualities displayed by the
pastor; so that in nearly every instance he
wey be said to earn, personally, the rev.
011110 of his churoh.
TIONGS MAN CAN'T 1)0.
Oe Has accomplished Wonders, no Doubt,
Out Gere's Where be stumbles.
There is always' something clonal*
about,e, man's attempt to do a woman'a
work. And the fun of the thing ie that
man never realizes that he oannot do it
properly. There isn't a 1110111 on the foot.
stool who does not privately entertain the
opinion that, if he should only set himeell
about It, he could do anything better than
any women. Bat he can't and all the
women know it
He means well, no doubt, but somehow
he doesn't seen to have the faculty.
His wife goes on le visit to her mother,
and he keeps house. Now, he will tell
Brown that lee con odok a meal as well as
the best women that ever lived; but if he
ehould me Brown and souse of the boys
ooming up to his house to dinner, he would
bolt the door nd lie low till they went
To Render a Cellar Dry.
A problem whioh the builder, owner and
architect hes to deal with. every day is to
render a cellar dry. This leery be done in
a variety of ways, whittla will depend upon
the circumstances surrounding the case.
One of the most effeetive mettne of keeping
a cellar dry is to build an area wall around
the whole of the site, so that mirth does not
rest directly against the walls of the house.
To form such area a four -inch wall is built
parallel to the main weals, and about two
inches from them. The bottom of the
inolosed space ie formed into a gutter, so
that any water that finds its way through
the ,outer ming may .have an opportunity
of running away to the drains. The top of
the cavity is usually covered in jnet above
the ground line with e row of ornamental
bricks, or sometimes with brioks laid on
edge. When these means are adopted 1.5 10
desirable that openings in the main wall
sleould be provided for ventilation.—
National Builder.
Daley POpitcjity—Szater says she wotild
tke to be executed this evening. She isn't
leeling well.
Mr. Poseyboy—Coute now. Daisy, you
kneon that isn't so! Tell me the real reit-
Pon and I11give you half a ponnd of candy.
44 And vitt won'e tell that tota—itottost
LOW ?"
" No, Daisy, I wen't
" Well, there she eitteli find her
A Lucky Prisoner.
0111 Leiwyer—I, cannot take year ease.
Cheurneeential evidenee ie to strdng agairait
Ion that it Will be impOseible to peove your
innO98006.
Prisoner—Bat 1 am not innOdent1 ani
gniity.
"Oh 1 Then mityhe I Can clear yen."
—A croseed woman is nearly as dedige
Otis tit a orosieed electlic wire.
Etre. Smitetn—Bobby, yon baa boy, have
you been „fighting with Tokneny Samson
again? • Dear, dear! I shall have to get
yeti et new edit. '
Bobby -I -That's nothing, ma. You ought
to see Tommy filinseore His ma may have
to get her a new boy.
"A Doll's House."
The costliest doll's house probably in the
world is that made by a Chicago man for
his 4 year-old daughter at a coat of e3,500.
It is built of briok, with ei tower andoctpole
like an anoient cicadae and looks for all the
world like it miniature reproduction of the
great modern reeidenoe of some millioneire.
It has a little flight of steps !feeding tip to
the solid oak front door and an eleotrio
push bell for the convenience of the baby
viaitors of the happy mistress of the house.
On this door, vehicle, by the way, is four
feet high, is the name of the Proprietor on
a silver pieta There is a hallway lighted
by a miniature gee lamp, suspended from
the ceiling, and it is finished in the choieeet
of hard woods. There are nmbeetle, and
hat racks of appropriate dimensions. Ele-
gant draperies cover the parlor doors, and
the parlor is fitted up in grand style. The
furniture is all of .white enamelled wood,
covered with white broeaded silk. There
is an elegant mantel filled with brio-a-brao
of the choioest kind, and little hops of
the choked patterns. A beautife chan-
delier, furnished with real gee; hangs from
the centre of the' room. Centre tables,
divans, easy chain, ,sofait, eto., fill up the
apartments. .
He never can touoh a kettle without get'.
tine soiled. He can't handle the fire irons
without burning his fingers. He never
thinks to hang up any towels; he keeps
them 'on the floor, where they will be
handy. A maneannot do two thinge at a
time. A woman will broil a steak, and
see that the coffee does not boil over, and
vwatoh the oat that she does not steel the
remnant of meat on the kitoben table, and
dress the youngest boy, and eat the table,
ancl see to the toast, and stir the oatmeal,
and give orders to the butcher, and wit.
ness the way her neighbor across the
street is hanging out her olothes—and ahe
can do it ell t once end not half try. -
Is there a man living who can hold
fifteen pins in hie month, and fit a drese
waist, and talk over the scandal about the
minister at the same time? 01 come there
is not, and yet a woman can do it easily,
and enjoy it, too.
A DatlI1 will work diligently hall the fore.
noon to find a shirt button, and when he
has found it, it will be three sizes too large
for the buttonhole, and then he will begin
to thread hieneedle. And he will squint,
and take aim, and sweat, and swear, end
the thread will slip right by the needle
every time, and if ever he does get the
needle threaded it will be each a big needle
that it will split the button clean in two
and he will find himself exaotly where he
started from.
Man has done wonders since he came
before the publio. He has navigated the
ocean, he has penetrated the mysteries of
the starry heavens, he hes harnessed the
ligleming and made it pull street oars and
lightrthe great cities of the world. Oh; yes,
we , fFe willing to admit that man has done
hie isart, but he couldn't pour castor oil into
a colicky baby without spilling it all over
thelmety's clothes, to save his life!
ge can't find a spool of red thread in his
wifetit sewing machine drawers—no, he
can't", and after he searches half an hour,
and manfully keeps his temper meanwhile,
he will appear with a spool of blue silk, ani
vow that such.a thing as red thread has no
existence in that house.
A man cannot hang out clothes and get
them on the line the right end up. He cane
not hold clothes pins in his mouth while he
is doing it, either.
He cannot be polite to somebody he hatee.
He would never think of kissing his rival
when he Met him, en a woman will kin her
rival. He can't chew gum. He can't sit
in th rocking chair witnout banging the
rockers into the base boards. He can't put
the tidy on the sofa pillow right side out.
He can't wear No. 3 boots on No. 5 feet
He'd die with corsets on 1 He'd. get his
death of cold with bare arms and neck.
And yet people who do- not know call
women the weaker sex!—Kate Thorn in
Neto York Weekly. "
Why the I/tune Han Went,
Peterfeinilien (front tbe head of the stairs
at 2 mw )—Fanny, will You Ask that 5rPoofi
man to num into the hall a moment?
Young Man (timidly)—W-well, air?
" just wanted to atilt you where you
Wented yottr trunk pat when it comae"
Find coat of pint—How long have you
been here? Second dont of psittt—I earn°
tooley. First Oat of 01ot-16°1:Ott yen
looked fresh.
Githertd the librettist, satisfied
that "The Gondoliere " ie o aneeese, bee
started tor India with his wife.
HOW A QIIROBtO IS 1141:014.
An Interesting Process with Which Few
Feople Are Familiar.
We eee tens of Moorlands of chrom,.
which are given away by every enterprising;
business men, yet I venture the aseertion;
that very few know how they are produced.
To properly produce) a ohromo the litho-
grapher must be en rapport with the artist.,
Hp must antilyze the pioture,fully realize
the eombinationn of colon and the spirit of.
the work. Having determined just how'
many basic colors miter into the piature.
the artiat commences hie work by pre-
paring a lithographio etoue for each sopa,-
rate color. The ertiat commences his work:
by making a delioete and elaborate ink -
tracing of the pioture e not only its general
°talkies, bat the Inmate and intricettei
touches and eleades of color of which it le
composed. The treeing piper is chemi-
cally prepered, ao that the lines upon it can
be readily transferred to atone. A preen' iet
employed to trensfer the impreesione oni
the paper to the merle, coneidemble pros -
sure being need. Thonsaude of impress-
sions oan then be taken from the stone by
eimply running an ink roller over it.
The tracing thus transferred forms what
is known as the key stone. Suppose there
are twenty oolore in the olaromo. This
number of impreseions is taken from the
key stone and each carefully dusted with
red chalk. A dimoffset of the entire tree-
ing is then 'nested en much one of theete
stones.
The drawing then begins, and often
occupies many months. Each stone is to
be printed in a stperate color, and there -
tore mast contaan not onlyall that is
neoessary of that color of the picture, to the
minuteet detail but all of the compoun&.
colors, made byprinting one or more over
others. A. variety of gradations of color
from its full strength to the faintest tinting
can be produced on each stone, juet aa in
usingan ordinary penoil or crayon Ors
drawing paper. These various colors are1
of course, worked up -in black by the artiste:.
and it is the printa who applies the colon.
The lines on each s iterate stone are etche&
with the wash of nitric add and gam
arabio, and are ready for the presses.
The printer must be as skilful as the
artiat in applying hie colors, and mush
fully realize ihe blending and effect of moll
color. As fast as each color is printeditia
submitted to the artist, who has thus a yea-
greseive proof of the work.
It has been probably noticed that lines,
cross each other on the margin of re
chromo. These are the registering martz.
and enable the printer to place the sheath'
the same relative position every time a new
stone ie need and a new color applied.
These lines are drawn in the original tracing
and appearon each stone. 'When this first
color is printed eery small- 'holes ' are
punctured in each sheet at she intersection.
of these, lines, very flue 'holice are also
drilled in corresponding positions on each;
of the subsequent stones, and the holes We
the paper are to correspond precisely with,
the holes in the stone'and thue as emir
additional color is put 00 a perfect register
is secured and each color falba just where
it belongs.
The next promise le to make the chrome
have a rough surface' like an oil painting.
A stone is now prepared which has et
rough surface, similar so canvas. The
'Airmen) is then laid upon, it and passedi
through a press with heavy presume. Whets
it comes forth it is an omit imitation
of the painting. It is then varnished, and
thus you have the ohromo ready for the
market.
The world is yet practically dependent
on one quarry in Bavaria for its litho-
graphic atone. Stones have been found
in Frenoe England, Caned& and the
United Stetes, bat none poetess the quali-
ties of the best Gemmel stones. A be
of lithographic) stone has been found in
Sequatobie valley, not far from Chat-
tanooga, and the inveetigations an far indi-
cate that it will yield stone of a very
fine qaality. If it should prove so, it will
be literally a gold mine. The finer
(indite; of stone is to -day worth 13 cents
per pound, and is very soaroe.---Nashrilfe
(Tenn.) Times.
Morsels of Gastronomy.
Care of the Teeth.
At the meeting in' Berlin last • epring of
the German Association of American Den-
tists, the best inee.nee of preserving the
teeth were discussed, and Dr. Richter, of
Breelenesaid "We know that . the whole
Method ot correctly' oaring for the teeth
can be' expressed in • two words—brash,
map. In these two things we have all
that is needful for the preservation of the
teeth. All the preparations not containing
soap are not to be recommended, and if
they contain soap ell other ingredients are
neeless exeept for the purpose, of `making
their taste agreeable. Among the soaps
the white °senile soap of the English merket
is especially to be recommended. A slimier
of tooth preparations has been thrown on
the market, but very few of which are to
be recommended. Testing the composition
of them, we find that about 90 per cent.
are not only .unsuitable for their pnrpos,
but that the greater part are actually
harmful. All the preparations containing
salicylic add are, as the investigations of
Fernier have' shown, • destructive of the
'teeth. He who will unceasingly preach to
his patients to,brush their teeth carefully
shortly before bedtime, as a cleansing
material to use oastile soap, as a mouth
wash a solution of oil oft peppermint in
water, and to .cleanse the spaces between
the teethby oarefal neo of a silken thread,
will help them in preserving their teeth,
and wilt win the gratitude end good words
of the public,"
A proof ot the pudding is the eating
and of the mince pie the depth thereof.
"Shall I help you to it thoroughbred?"
is the new invitation to pertake of &maw.
One head of lettuce is guaranteed to mere
another head of a case of insomnia.
There is not as much heard as there was
about the efficacy of celery for nervousness.
Imported English plum pudding in tins
is at best a poor substitute for the real
thing. •
• Some of the caterers are introducing
new kind of water -i00, eaid to be the thing
among the British colony in India an&
Africa.
In England the °anent:option of Ameni
can canned food ie represented to be con-
tinually on the increase, especially among
the middle clauses, who have a special
fondness for the canned , toinetoes —New
York Mail and Express.
A Serious Man Now.
"Whore is the dashing .boarder who used
to be the life of the table when I was here,
before, Mrs. Livermore?" aeked an old
patron of the hone°, addressing the
landlady.
" I Married/lam," wae.the quiet reply.
'1 Indeed 1 He Was 0110 of the sprightliest
fellows 1 ever met, alentyri bubbling over
with spirite and chock-full of atonies. He'S
away from home. t impposee' I haven't seen
him (mem I returned.'
" He's at home; he has never been sway.
" Indeed! where ift he, then?"
" Ele'e in the kitchen washing dishes." --
Boston Ginnie?.
The hest paid Magazine editor in New
York is probably Editor Gilder, of the Cm.
turn, who ill Mid to have a salary of 210,000
is year, beside an interest in the magezint.
Mr. Stiokney—I have cord00 Mr, /len-
peck, to task for tho Italia of year clatighter.
Mr. Itenpeck—Blees you, my boy, take
her; and may the Lord have mtiroy upon
your Sold.
Full Grown.
Briggs—Well, we harem addition to ottr
family yesterday.
Bragge—You don't Say so 1 Boy or girl?
Briggs—Neither. e It was my wife's
mother.
The Length of the Day.
At London, England, and Bremen, Prue
Ma, the longest,day has sixteen , and one-
half hours. At Stookholm, Sweden, it is
eighteen and one-half hours in length. At
Hamburg, in Germany; and Dantzio, in
Prussia,' the longest day has seventeen
hours: At St. Petersburg, Russia, and
Tobolsk, Siberie, the longest is nineteen
and the sliorteet;,fite,houra. At Tornea,
Finland, Jane 21 brings a day nearly twenty
two hones in length. At Christmas one
less than three house long. At Warbury,
Noeway, tbe, longest day lasts frorn May 21
to 3nly,22, without interruption, that is to
soy the sun is never set in that time, and in
Spitzbergen the longest day is three and a
half months. .
At Philadelphia the longest day is some-
what leee than fifteen hoots, and at Mon-
treal, Canada, it ie sixteen.—Nature.
'
Good Advice.
"I'm dreadfully upset," said the spilled
"Yon can't be half so agitated as I am,"
retorted the Irish qdestion.
"Do as I do," said the door, as he shut
himself up.
Iteturning the Compliment. ,
Old Gentleman (to emall boy)—I wish you
a happy New Ylltir: my soh', and hope you
Will improve in WISa0131, knowledge and
Small Hoy (politely and initooently)—
Thank you, sir ; the same tO yon.
A Successful BUBillO$8 Man.
Country bride (taking in the sights) ---
Whet a big printin' bueineee this Mr. Job
must do, John.
Country Bridegroom—Yes, he's got print -
in' offices all over the city.
A. Ponce Inspector's "Don'ts."
k'OR WOMEN.
Don't carry a pocketbook in your hand.
Don't carry a pooket-hook ina ery
loose pooket whioh hangs away from the
perfume
Don't lay your hand•beg, containing
your pooket-book, on the connter of a store
while you walk aoroes the room to examine,
goods.
• Don't wear a watch in 8 poems on out-
side of dress.
Don't wear cheiteleine watches.
Don't judge strangers by their dress.
Don't stand long in the same spot in, in
crowd.
YOU ISEM
Don't go into a crowd with your outer
coat unbuttoned.
Don't carry velnables in your outer coat.
•Don't make too great a displey of your
jewelry.
Don't earry money in the pooket oa the
right hand side of your tronsere Pick-
pockets expect to find money there.
Don't forget that you are met as likely as
anybody else to be a, viatica of pickpookete.,
—Boston Transcript.
Do the Dying Suffer Pato?
She Wanted to be Sttre.
Old Gentleman (to little girl on thehorse
oar)_ -How old nets you little girl?
Little Girl—Are got: the conductor?
Old Gelithinien—Whei no; I !neve noth-
ing to do with the railroad.
Then I'm 7 years old.
(Collepse of little gtri a' mother.)
8be Noew 15Wastaoceioire
He (et the hall)—Do you know I have
deoided never to get rearrieft
She (haatily)--Let us go into the cOnaerv
atony.
The rule is that unconsciousness, not
pain, attends the final act A natural
death is not more peintal than birth.
Painlessly we come; whence we know not.
Painlessly we go; where we know nate
Nature kindly provides an avareathetio for
the body when the spirit leeive,s 1.5. Frew
%dons to that moment, and in preparatioil.
for it, respiration becomes feeble, generally
slow snd short, often acoompaniect by long
inspiretions, and short, midden expiretionee
so that the blood le ateadily less and less
oxygenated. At the SUMO time, the heart'
e.ota with corresponding debility,„ producing
a slow, feeble, and often irregular pulse.
As this proms goes; on the blooe is not
Onlyeeriven to the heed in diminished force
and in less qmenttty, bat whet flows them,
is loaded with carbonic is wee power -
1 til anaesthetic, the same BB derived from
disrobed. Subjeoted to the influence of
this gas the nerve centres lose conscious-.
nese and sensibility, apparent eleep creeps
over the syetem ; then contee stupor and
then the end.—St. Louis' Rcpublie.
It Looked That Way.
Walle—Did Bled( win the 'emelt he
had over that large mini of mentty 2
Weillace— / suppose he did. Ile told
me he leeked only $450 of having enough
to pay,the lawyer, after it wits over.
—.Bristle-- I want to look at DOM°
ehirts, Claris — Yes, air. You're a
Stranger in town,. are yea not ? Bristle
(proud's') — Yee, sir, I ere. My home, sir,
is in Chioago. Sletk Ah, 10/11 what
kind Of flannel do you. prefer?
' Conjugal Love at Monterey.
Wife—Oh, my dor! don't go' in ,thafe
boat Yott risk your life. ,
Haaband—No, dealing, don't he efritid.
" amoeba I hew wretched I &m! Ifseett
ehould drown! You arc so aWkward,t '.
" Let me etloneetielen, I know the itea and.
it kriowe me."
"Very ,well, dear, at least leave ma yotur
watch and chain 10
—Xing kalakona, of the Sandwich
Diands, ia a handedrale roam rotund an&
well.proportioned, nearly six feet in hight
and nearly 200 porinde in weight. Ha
etands Greet and ham oetatelY and dignified,
appearance. His complexion ie dark Ma-
hogany, lont nicer and soft. Hie, hair fit
black and silby, end he Wean aide -whiskers.
Mustache and imperial.