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The Citizen, 2006-07-06, Page 5THE CITIZEN, THURSDAY, JULY 6, 2006. PAGE 5. Other Views Philip the loose-lipped / don't know how the 2010 Olympics in Vancouver are going to pan out, but the organizers have already made one savvy move on the road to success. They're not inviting Prince Philip. _ This is a clever tactic because Prince Philip has a tendency to verbally torpedo just any project he's associated with. In any case, Philip's already booked, Olympics-wise. He's scheduled to take part in the opening and closing ceremonies for the 2012 Olympics in London. Good luck, London. Asked by newspaper reporters to describe his participation in The Games Philip harrumphed that he fully intends to do "as little as possible." "I am truly fed up with the opening and closing ceremonies. They are a pain in the neck: Absolute bloody nuisances. I haven't been to one that wasn't absolutely, appallingly awful." Tell us how you really feel, Phil. Great Britain has already given us Richard The Lion-Hearted. Edward the Confessor and Ethelred the Unready. Make way for Philip the Loose-Lipped. This is the diplomat who, addressing British students in Beijing, warned them "if you' stay here much longer you'll all be slitty-eyed." Philip is the smooth talker who asked a driving instructor in Scotland how he managed to "keep the natives off the booze long enough" to pass their driving test. Canada has not escaped the back side of Philip's tongue. On being served yet another fish dinner during a Royal Visit to Nova Scotia in 1977, Philip moaned, "If I have to eat any more salmon I shall swim up a river and spawn." On a Royal Visit to Calgary, he was presented with the requisite white 10-gallon 0 ntario's political parties are dropping hints of what they will say trying to win an election in 2007 — and some of it will be dirty. Liberal Premier Dalton McGuinty has indicated he will ask voters to look at "the big picture" rather than aspects of it such as his broken promises. McGuinty will concede he broke a commitment not to raise taxes so he could increase revenue after the defeated Progressive Conservative government left him a huge deficit, but will not ask voters to forgive him. - Instead he will urge them to recognize he is using revenue ,pouring in from an economic upturn to rebuild long neglected infrastructure, including roads, bridges and public transit, and improve health and education, rather than cut taxes. The premier will say the Conservatives, under John Tory, would have used extra revenue to cut taxes, as they did under former premier Mike Harris. But he believes the public will respect him for "doing the right thing and not the easy and popular thing," which sounds like the start of a campaign slogan. The Liberals will say Tory would return to the Harris style of cutting taxes, which weakened services. They believe voters will not want to go back to this and will mention Harris so often voters will think he is back as party leader. . McGuinty also will ratchet up his claim the federal government-collects a lot of money in Ontario and returns little, so it has large surpluses, while the province struggles to finance needed programs, which he has been calling the fiscal imbalance. McGuinty will try to cast himself as Stetson. At which he bawled, "Oh God, not another one!" He later elaborated "Once given the key to the city you don't go on getting keys to the city." Philip is not only blunt, he has an undernourished attention span. In Vancouver in 1971 he was expected to officially bless a newly constructed annex to Vancouver City Hall. Philip chafed visibly as politician after politician stood up and droned on about the architectural splendour, the cultural significance, the signal honour, blah, blah and blah. Finally, when it was his turn to officially pronounce-the building up and running, Philip strode to the microphone and said: "I declare this thing open, whatever it is." He later confessed that he had forgotten the name. "It was raining, and I wanted to get on with it: especially as the total audience was about 15 passing shoppers under umbrellas." Apparently, Vancouverites agree with Philip's underwhelmed reaction. To this day the annex is known as the East Thing. Prince Philip is a curmudgeon's curmudgeon. He can get away with it because he's 85 years old. But the truth is, he's always been crude as royal standards go — and decidedly arrogant. But you know' what? I like it. The man is honest. A blue-blooded lager lout. Archie standing up for provincial taxpayers against a greedy federal government, which he can do with little restraint, because for a- change the Conservatives and not his .own party are in power in Ottawa. Tory will not want to be seen quarreling with his federal party and has said' often that McGuinty blames the federal Conservatives for every problem. Tory would say he'd help Ontario more by working with them. McGuinty has responded the Ontario Conservative leader should stand up for his province. This has the makings of a row in which McGuinty could accuse Tory of being a puppet of his federal party, which is the sort of charge that has hurt provincial parties in the past. Tory's main theme at this time is to accuse McGuinty of providing "indecisive leadership" and he can cite examples including the Liberals promising to close coal- fired power stations by 2007 to reduce pollution and having to postpone this because they failed to ensure there would be alternative power to replace them. Tory will also say McGuinty has been slow tackling problems including gang shootings in Toronto and a dispute over Native land provoking violence in Caledonia. Not even the premier's best friends will be able to claim he • • Bunker in ermine. Wouldn't you prefer to hear Philip's not-so- bon mots over the banal utterances of just about any politician of any stripe these days? There's a book out by Joe Klein called Politics Lost: How Democracy Was Trivialized By People Who Think You're Stupid. Klein's theme is that political pronouncements have been 'dumbed down' to the point where anything a politician says is so bland as to be meaningless. He's right. Think George Bush and his "Amurrica• is about Freedom' mantra. Do you . remember any word or phrase uttered by Paul Martin when he was PM? Every time he opened his mouth he sounded like a duck caught in a leg-hold trap. Stephen Harper is no better. He sounds like Mister Dressup, talking in a simple, rhythmic cadence, like a dad reciting a fairy tale to a sleepy child. Which come to think of it... Nope, give me splenetic, old, politically incorrect, shoot-from-the-lip, Phil — who, to be fair, can be witty and self-deprecating. Once in Australia, hey/as introduced to a 'Mr. and Dr. Robinson'. "My wife is a Doctor of Philosophy," explained Mr. Robinson. "She is much more important than I." "Ah, yes," replied Prince Philip. "We have that problem in our family too." But Philip doesn't always have the final word. On a visit to the city of Brasilia, he asked a Brazilian admiral about the colourful strip of medals on his chest. "Did you earn those on Brasilia's artificial lake?" he sneered. "Yes sir," replied the admiral with a disarming smile. "Not by marriage." grabbed these issues and made them his own. Tory says he would cancel McGuinty's $2.5 billion tax hike, but not how he would find alternative money to maintain programs or which he would cut. The Conservative leader says vaguely he is considering tax help to parents who send their children to private religious schools and this would be a partial revival of a Harris policy that would be fought tooth-and-nail. Tory is still unusually short of policies in some key areas and like McGuinty risks being labeled indecisive. The Liberals also have been exhuming Tory's past and recalled recently in the legislature he chaired a federal election campaign and ran TV commercials emphasizing then Liberal leader Jean Chretien's partial facial paralysis with the comment he would be an embarrassing prime minister, probably the most distasteful election ads ever. The Liberals also have found that, Tory, while running a cable TV company. cut hundreds of jobs and explained this happens at times in business. If these are mentioned in the current phony war, think how they will be shouted froni the housetops in the heat of an election. Final Thought Words are one of our chief means of adjusting to all the situations of life. The better control we have of our words, the more successful our adjustment will be. - Bergan Evans Summer fun Thoughts of summer traditionally conjure such picturesque beauty as blue waters lapping onto a sandy beach. Or someone lazying under a shady tree, the gentle breezes swaying their hammock. Or a hatted woman enjoying a quiet read on a garden bench, amidst riotous colour and cavorting insects. But there's another part of summer. Crowds of people gathered on a front lawn. Others stroll languidly down the street. Music plays and acquaintances re-acquaint. There's a party about to happen and the feeling is in the air. As the temperatures warm, it's time for theatre again. While Blyth Festival celebrated its 2006 opening on Friday night, a season which will mark its 100th Canadian premiere, audiences have already had the opportunity to enjoy productions at Stratford and Huron Country Playhouse, as well as others a little further afield. On a warm summer evening, the faces may change but the picture remains the same outside each theatre throughout the summer. And the atmosphere is always festive. Work has given me the opportunity to enjoy a lot of theatre over the years. .And though I admire what takes place on stage I have come to equally enjoy other aspects of my nights at the Festival. This past Friday for example, my son and his wife accompanied us to the Blyth opening which made going to the theatre an even greater treat. We had a nice , dinner before seeing the homage to one of Jason's idols Stompin' Tom on the Festival stage. Actually, I always anticipate an opening night at Blyth, because it means a date with my husband. Since becoming empty nesters summer nights at home are spent boringly, albeit pleasingly so. Having raised four children, but now seemingly even busier living our own lives, having the time after supper to sit a bit, enjoy a book and the quiet isn't difficult to get used to. Yet, one has to be careful of the proverbial rut, so it's nice that at least four times in the summer we must leave our deck and our quiet musings, dress up a tad and go to a Blyth Festival opening. Mark decided a long time ago, however, after giving it a valiant effort, that I better find another date for Stratford. He doesn't hear the music in a Shakespearean ode, and he's never been fond of a song and dance. So, after a number of friends filled his shoes for a time, the role of being my theatre steady has gone to one good friend for six seasons now. And what's particularly fun about this is that we are kindred spirits when it comes to how to spend an enjoyable night away from home. Besides theatre, we both love dining out and wining out. Finding new places to eat before the theatre has become a bit of an event. And in Stratford that will keep us going for awhile. So it's not just the entertainment on stage, the drama and comedy that has made theatre such a great part of my summer. Sure, as Shakespeare pointed out, the play is definitely "the thing", but it's also nice to experience something that doesn't just take you out of the routine, but which provides the perfect excuse to expand on the enjoyment factor. Political parties drop election hints