The Citizen, 2003-06-18, Page 5THE CITIZEN, WEDNESDAY, JUNE 18, 2003. PAGE 5.
Other Views
I must say,
One of the strengths of the English
language is that, when it doesn’t have
a decent home-grown word, it imports
as necessary from foreign tongues.
One of our great imports is chutzpah. It
comes from Yiddish and means supreme self
confidence. Nerve, gall.
And a little bit more.
Michelle Landsberg, a columnist for The
Toronto Daily Star used to live in New York
city. She wrote a book about it called This Is
New York, Honey!
The title came from something that
happened to her on Park Avenue one
afternoon. Landsberg had hailed a taxi, opened
the back door and was about to climb in, when
she was blind-sided, cross-checked and left on
the curb by a well-dressed matron who deftly
wedged herself in the cab and started barking
instructions to the driver.
“B-b-b-but I hailed this taxi,” objected
Landsberg.
The interloper fixed her with a deadpan stare
and snarled, “This is New York, honey” as the
taxi sped away.
That’s chutzpah.
But you don’t have to live in New York to
encounter the phenomenon. O.J. Simpson was
in the news last week musing about how he’d
like to try his hand as a news commentator - on
the upcoming trial of alleged actor/murderer
Robert Blake.
“I think I have a lot of insight,” said Simpson
- also an alleged actor/murderer.
That’s chutzpah. If Fox News signs him up,
that’ll be chutzpah squared.
There’s a Swazi radio correspondent who
seems to have a fair dose of the condition as
well. This guy was providing live daily reports
Reasons for donations hard to prove
Atop fundraiser for Ontario’s
Progressive Conservative party once
destroyed the records of a company’s
controversial donation not long before police
raided the office searching for them.
But an Ontario Supreme Court judge who
conducted a public enquiry because the Tory
government gave the company a lucrative
benefit, generously found “nothing sinister” in
shredding them.
The judge, the late Justice Samuel H.S.
Hughes, picked by Tory premier William
Davis to conduct the inquiry in the 1970s, was
as much a Tory as if he had been sent over by
party headquarters.
Hughes was an intimate of several Tory
premiers, campaigned and ran for the party
and even nominated Old Man Ontario, Leslie
Frost, when he became leader and premier.
Presumably Davis could not find a judge less
partisan.
These are the sort of odds critics have been
up against when they tried to prove Tory
governments give favours in return for
donations. They have gotten close to proving it
only in rare cases when some scrap of paper
accidentally popped up that bolstered their
cause.
In their latest complaint, a developer whose
companies donated $1 million to the Tory
party under premiers Mike Harris and Ernie
Eves was lent $36 million to buy land by a
government board that manages employees’
pension assets.
The board has never lent anyone else money
for such purposes and the Liberals claim it lent
in return for the donation, which may sound a
reasonable theory, but proving it is difficult.
Another recent example was a small horse
racetrack, Picov Downs, which donated
lavishly to Tories’ leadership campaigns and
received the government’s permission to install
of all the nerve!
Arthur
Black
from Baghdad during the recent
Saddamectorny. He was one of the very few
correspondents willing to risk their lives to be
at the centre of the attack as the American
maelstrom descended.
At least, that’s what his radio listeners
thought. Turns out he was broadcasting from a
broom closet in downtown Johannesburg.
And let’s not forget Sinead O’Connor in the
Chutzpah Sweepstakes. The Irish thrush-cum-
flake, famous for shredding a picture of the
Pope on stage, has announced that she is
retiring from show business.
“I request that as of July, since I no longer
seek to be a famous person, and instead I wish
to live a normal life, could people please afford
me my privacy,” she wrote.
On her website.
Hey, Sinead - no problem here. I won’t call
if you don’t call.
No report on chutzpah would be complete
without some input from the legal profession. I
nominate Manhattan lawyer Jeffrey Powell.
He recently sued singer-songwriter John
Fogarty for $5 million U.S. as compensation
for “profound loss of hearing in his left ear”.
Seems Mister Powell went to a music
concert featuring Mister Fogarty and found the
music too loud.
Alas, Mister Powell’s plaints fell on deaf
Eric
Dowd
From
Queen’s Park
far more lucrative slot machines than its size
entitled it to.
The Liberals similarly suggested the Tory
government awarded the slots because the
track donated to the Tory party.
What the opposition party needs is
something incriminating on paper, as
happened in the early 1970s after an
investment company, Fidinam (Ontario) Ltd.,
donated $50,000 to the Tory party and around
the same time the Davis government lent it
money for a new office complex and
guaranteed to rent space in it.
The company’s overseas parent asked why
and to whom the money was given and the
developer sent back a telex explaining it was a
“political donation” relating to the deal with
the government.
Davis at this time, opted for an investigation
by the government’s own, trusted lawyers, who
concluded there was no evidence to prove the
government gave help specifically in return for
the donation or any breach of the criminal
code.
But most neutral observers felt the memo
told the real story and the Tories had been
caught red-handed and Davis obviously felt
worried, because he quickly changed the law
to limit donations and make them public.
Another incriminating piece of paper
prompted the inquiry Judge Hughes presided
over. The Securities and Exchange
ears. An unsympathetic judge pointed out that
“an objective, reasonable, 56-year-old lawyer”
should be smart enough to intuit that
voluntarily purchasing a ticket to a rock
concert might conceivably lead to loud music
causing hearing impairment. He threw the case
out.
Give your head a shake. Mister Powell.
Might clear that left ear.
Any Canadian chutzpah candidates - or are
we just too bland, diffident and polite in The
Great White North to play in the Brass Balls
Big Leagues?
Meet Dustin Dickeson, of Sechelt, B.C.
He’s 21 years old now but he’s got more
mileage on his odometer than the average 21-
year-old. Back when he was 17, Dickeson had
an affair with his high school accounting
teacher.
Word got out, the ordure hit the air
circulating device, the teacher was canned and
Dickeson was protected by a court-ordered
publication ban.
Well, Dickeson went to court to get the ban
lifted. Seems he’s graduated (?) into a self-
styled gangsta rapper, complete with a home-
pressed CD. “I got stuff coming up in New
York” he explained to a provincial court judge.
That’s why he wanted the publication ban
removed. He wanted to cash in on his
notoriety.
Traumatized by the event? Not hardly.
There’s a song on his CD called Teacher’s
Scandal, which features the tender lyric: “the
bitch couldn’t resist my charm”.
Sounds to me like Dustin Dickeson is ready
for New York.
If he’ll promise to take out citizenship, I’ll
kick in for bus fare.
Commission in the United States investigated a
company there and lound it had a secret fund
from which it made political payments.
One was through a Canadian subsidiary,
Disposal Services Ltd., which had been getting
nowhere against pesky neighbours in
persuading the Davis government to allow it to
use a site north of Toronto as a garbage dump,
but donated $35,000 to the Tory party and
magically won approval within a week.
An employee wrote a memo explaining the
donation was for political reasons and to
secure a favourable ruling and the Tories
proved as secretive as the CIA - the money
was paid into an account with a number, which
turned out to be the car licence plate number of
a Tory bagman.
But the learned judge found it was only
coincidence the company donated to the Tory
party and quickly won a benefit from
government. Any outrage he expressed was at
what he called “modern prejudice against
political fundraising.”
He might have been one of Eves’s
fundraisers of today, who would like voters to
believe all donors to them give from the
goodness of their hearts.
Bonnie
Gropp
The short of it
Rocking away
As if it were yesterday 1 remember the
first time I saw him. A thick mop of
hair, gorgeous sleepy eyes and a
dreamy smile. 1 was nine — and besotted.
“Mom, he is sooooo cute.”
It was February, 1964 and the object of my
affection was a handsome 21-year-old whom
most in North America were also seeing for
the first time.
And, while I may have grown up
considerably since then, my girlish infatuation
has not entirely disappeared. I still think Paul
McCartney’s sooooo cute, even though today,
June 18, my favourite former Beatle turns an
incredible 61.
Is it just my imagination or does 61 not look
like 61 anymore? Granted, there’s something
about drawing closer to an age one’s self that
smooths the wrinkles of impending
seniordom. But I think even a 20-something
today would have a hard time reconciling
McCartney’s own image of “When I’m 64”
with the still boyish-faced, expectant dad, who
can rock with the best of them, which is the
reality.
Similar examples are everywhere. Paul
Newman was tearing up the car racing circuits
into his 70s. Fitness centres are full of people
in their 40s, 50s, and older striving to stay
healthy and active.
A story on the website of the internet
magazine Grand Times for “savvy” seniors
was on African safari options. There are golf
courses for seniors, internet dating services for
seniors, and — I admit, this one scares me a
little— according to an article ii. a recent copy
of Jane magazine, sex clubs for seniors.
The first people I can remember as 60-year-
olds were my grandparents, all of whom I
loved dearly, but who always seemed old to
me. It wasn’t their physical abilities that
caused this; they were hard workers who gave
until there was nothing left.
To say they were worn down by life would
be unfair; it was more that they let life show its
wear and tear. They aged without question,
withou' looking for ways to slow the process.
Only one showed any concession to vanity.
My maternal grandmother liked new dresses,
wore make-up and used a six-week rinse to
keep her grey hair - well, blue.
But she never gave up the restricting corset,
or a thought to how homely those white
orthopedic shoes were. Nothing was worth
sacrificing propriety or function.
Well fortunately today, with aging baby
boomers making up the greatest number of the
population, thus giving strongest voice to
demand, even function can be stylish. And as
propriety has pretty much gone out the
window (not always a fortunate thing,
however) we can be freer about things.
But just to test whether my theory of
youthful seniors was wishful thinking for
someone not too far off the mark, I recently
asked a young friend’s opinion. Did a mutual
acquaintance who had celebrated a milestone,
look to her like a 60-year-old? With almost no
thought to the query she responded with “no”.
The man, she says, doesn’t look his age, but
perhaps more interestingly, doesn’t “act like I
thought 60-year-olds would.”
June is seniors month, a time to remember
that senior doesn’t mean oid, a time to
celebrate a generation who don’t act their age.
They’re rocking the golden years away, and I
don’t mean in chairs.
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