The Citizen, 2001-10-31, Page 5THE CITIZEN, WEDNESDAY, OCTOBER 31, 2001. PAGE 5.
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This is a bad case of puppy love
(have a new dog. If that statement causes
you to yawn, blanch, retch or recoil in
horror, turn the page now.
For this is a dog story.
First a few words about my old dog, Rufus.
He was a funny and faithful companion
through three homes, two provinces and 15
years before his legs gave out and he began to
bark at groundhogs that weren't there.
When Rufus finally went to The Celestial
Doghouse, we vowed never to have a dog
again. Too much commitment, too much hair
on the chesterfield, too devastating when they
go and too expensive (did I mention Rufus was
the recipient of two, count 'em, two root
canals?)
We went muttless for a year and a half - right
up until that fateful day we were driving into
town and came upon two dogs doing. . .what
pairs of dogs have an uncanny knack for doing
in public at the most inappropriate times -
usually when you're walking with your kids or
chatting with the parson.
I don't wish to get graphic about what they
were up to. Suffice to say that whatever they
were doing, they were doing it doggy-style.
The canine rampant was a beautiful golden
retriever. Receiving his pitch, as it were, was
an equally gorgeous black and white border
collie.
My boon companion and I sat up as if cattle-
prodded and spoke with one voice. Right out
loud. Right there in the car.
And what we both said in perfect two-part
Fl very once in a while I like to bring you a
story about a place the existence of
4
which may be only vaguely familiar to
you, or you may not have heard of it at all.
My choice for this round of little known
places is the Caspian Sea and to set you straight
right at the beginning on where it is, let me tell
you that its waters wash on five countries —
Russia, Kazakhstan (the Toronto. Maple Leafs
have a hockey player from this country),
Turkmenistan, Iran, and Azerbaijan.
Why do I even mention all this?
Well, the Caspian Sea has an estimated 70-
200 billion barrels of oil underneath it. Nobody_
is quite sure how much but it stands to be the
biggest source of untapped oil in the world (the
tar sands of Canada are another).
All five countries want as big a share of this
immense wealth as possible, preferably more
than their share. The result of all this greed is
150 per cent of total.capacity.
Given that these countries cannot be exactly
described as stable, you can see that we have
all the makings of a dispute that can easily
escalate. In fact, there have been a- few minor
skirmishes already.
In one, an Iranian naval vessel came across
two British oil-exploration ships doing a
survey for an Azerbaijani company and chased
them away. While the area being explored was
not in the Iranian section of the Sea, Iran
argued that, since each country's oil regions
had not yet been finalized, nobody should be
exploring in that area.
Just to make sure this point came across, Iran
then sent military aircraft to patrol the same
area. Azerbaijan was not amused! But it has no
navy so could do nothing about it.
Not only are these five countries not stable,
but they do not have any laudable record of
western-style negotiating. Russia may not be a
superpower any longer but its armed forces like
to keep in practice by flexing their muscles
now and again. They prefer to do this in this
• area especially when three of the other four
countries bordering. on the Caspian used to
belong Co the Soviet Union and were regularly
browbeaten by Moscow.
To cite one example of this, Russian
warships in the Caspian anchored close to the
port of Baku, capital of-Azerbaijan, and only
after their anchors were down did they bother
informing the Azerbaijanis of their presence.
In fact, none of the five countries seems to be
overly friendly with any of the other four. As it
harmony, was:
"WE WANT ONE OF THEIR PUPS!"
A pup with the languid disposition of a
golden retriever AND the intelligence and
trainability of a border collie? This is better
than cloning!
Besides - lots of folks get to see the birth of
their puppies - how many get to be there at the
conception?
To make a long and somewhat embarrassing
story short, we stalked those two lovers like a
pair of bloodhounds. We tracked them down a
driveway and found out where the female
lived. We confronted her owner, ascertained
that his wayward girl was named Katy,
informed him of the libidinous goings-on
going on behind his back down by the road -
and promised him a bottle of scotch if we could
have the pick of the eventual litter, if any.
That was several months ago - June 23, to be
precise.
The bottle of scotch was delivered in late
August - right after nine chubby balls of fur
were also delivered by Katy, the winsome, but
decidedly tartish border collie.
Raymond
Canon
The
International
Scene
is so often in that part of the world, there are
centuries of past insults and injuries to drag out
whenever the occasion demands it. ._
To cite one example Azerbaijan isn't happy
about the way Iran treats its Azeri minority in
the north of the country: it also sees an Islamic
plot every time someone opens the Koran.
Given that all five nations agree to disagree,
they might have to end up by bringing in a
neutral-Country to help divide up the sea in an
acceptable manner. Both British and American
THE EDITOR,
Let's give our heads a shake.
- In this climate of fear after Sept, 11, the
federal government is ramming' through anti-
terrorist legislation that will give police widely
expanded powers Detainment of three days
without a lawyer? Secret trials by judge not
jury? What are we doing?
We have a prime minister who choked a
protester, who made jokes about the use of
pepper spray on protesters and who told
them to gee elected if they want the right to
speak.
We have (had?) a premier who declared that
protesters against poverty were "terrorists" for
throwing furniture out windows. It also seems
increasingly probable, as more information
ewes forth on the Ipperwash protest, that he
put political pressure on police to set aside their
normal procedures in favour of more extreme
tactics.
The number of terrorists. in Canada is few
and far between, but police are part of our daily
lives. Will political influence affect their
actions?
We have deaf majority government
dictatorships across this country. Our
democracy is based on a tradition of fairness
and listening to its citizens, but it is nor
enforced in law. There are few legal limits on
As I write, the pick of the litter (well, OUR
pick - we chose her because she's kind of
goofy) lies sleeping on my feet, exhausted
from a day of digging in the flowerbeds,
chewing slippers and peeing on the rug.
The haggard parents are just emerging from
the 'what the hell were we thinking' stage of
dog ownership. We live in a welter of chew
toys, rubber bones, rawhide knots and other
assorted (and expensive) New Dog
Paraphernalia — most of it in mint condition.
The boxes the toys came in, however, have
been chewed pretty much beyond recognition.
The dog thrives on paper - especially toilet
paper. Amazing how many rooms you can
canter through with a mouthful of Charmin 3-
Ply before it's all unraveled.
Her name?
Well, given her penchant for paper products,
we were thinking of calling her MacMillan
Bloedel, but we named her Woolly instead.
Which is almost as stupid. We don't even
know how to spell it. Is it Woolly or Wooly?
Or Woollie? Or Woolley?
Doesn't matter. Every time we tell somebody
her name, they smile and pat her and say
"Good dog, Woody!"
Oh yeah - about the divine mix of breeds?
It's early days yet, but it looks pretty much like
Woolly's got the brute strength and gargantuan
appetite of the golden retriever plus the
frenzied hypemeurosis of the Type A border
collie.
I gotta go. She just peed on the rug again.
oil companies are already engaged in the area
since they have the expertise required to do the
proper drilling.
In addition, much of the oil that is found will
be sold to western industrial nations since that
is where the greatest demand is.
It is unfortunate that so much of the world's
supply of oil is to be found in politically
unstable areas. Saddam Hussein still holds
forth in Iraq; Iran dislikes anything foreign,
Nigeria is corrupt,, Venezuela is economically
shaky while the Gulf War did nothing to make
Saudi Arabia and Kuwait any more democratic.
Now there is the little matter of coming to
grips with terrorists from that area. Yet this is
the area on which we are dependent for much
of our oil.
Now we add the countries around the
Caspian Sea to this list. Add the Taliban to the
mix and you fiave a potentially explosive
situation.
what these majority governments can do. We in
Ontario know this well.
What will happen when the next G7 meeting
happens in Canada?
What forum is left for people to be heard?
The .frustration grows as we are surrounded
by deaf ears.
We have let our military, CSIS and the
immigration board fall into disrepair through
cutbacks which have left them understaffedand
poorly equipped. Now we need them and we
wonder whatever happened while we thirsted
for "tax breaks".
As these organizations lose funding, they
lose people. If they lose people, they are unable
to do the same job. It is as simple as that. These
institutions are able to do a good job when
given proper support and properly regulated.
The real question is whether or not anti-
terrorist legislation would have prevented the
Sept. 1 I attack. The terrorists lived in Florida
for years taking courses on combat techniques
and piloting. Yet, the well funded CIA did not
suspei t them.
The proposed anti-terrorist legislation is an
opportunistic reaction by the government in a
Ornate of fear that hands a tool to governments
that is ripe for abuse.
Terrorists — one. Freedom — zero.
4140 Easton.
About a good friend
O n a cold, lonely winter night they can
be your best friend. Under a soothing
summer sun, they keep you
entertained in a gentle, companionable manner
perfectly suited to warm weather relaxation.
They can be an addiction, an inspiration, an
education, an obsession.
I'm not sure when my love affair with books
began. Though I have no recollection of
anyone reading to me, I do know that from the
time I could follow words, I took great delight
in curling up with a book. As a child I found
the joy of rhythm and rhyme with Dr. Seuss. A
little older and it was on to the requisite
reading for a young lady — Little Women and
Nancy Drew.
And even in the midst of misguided
adolescence, when such simple pleasures were
threatened by a hyper-kinetic narcissism, I
still found pleasure bound within the covers
from an Agatha Christie mystery. Even the
required reading of Shakespeare in high
school, did not, as it did for many of my peers,
disenchant me. While the meaning of his
words may often have been lost, I liked the
language and its poetry.
Exploring the diversity of literary works
became an opportunity for me when as a
young girl, I spent several months with a farm
family who lived about 200 miles away from
my home. It was here that I sampled the works
of authors who had been before unknown to
me. The woman of the house was an avid
reader, often consuming four or five books. P
week. I recall my first morning there, feeling
not just a little homesick, asking her if I might
help her with something -- dusting,
vacuuming, anything to keep not just myself,
but my mind occupied. "No", she said. 'I'm
reading. Get a hook."
Thus became our daily routine, With breaks
for meal preparation and clean-up. I'm not
sure when she got her housework done
because the home, while not immdculate, was
certainly not what one might call dirty. What I
did know is that for a girl who had already
discovered the solace and comfort in
literature, it was an idyllic time.
That pleasure is something I hoped to share
with my children, and to a point have
succeeded. Three out of four isn't bad.
And if I can in any way help others discover
the joy to be found in a book, then I'm happy
to help. Some years ago, I was invited by my
two youngest children to read to their classes
as part of the Community dead-In Week. I felt
then that if I could leave them with any
thought about books, it is not just that they
provide companionship and entertainment, but
also that, like a good friend, they are constant.
A good book, I said then, is hard to put down,
hard to leave and hard to forget. I have
revisited some of my old favourites three and
four times. They never bore me. (Though I
suppose this is helped by my middle-aged
memory). .
Last Friday, for the fourth timel was again
in front of an elementary class reading to
another group of students.
For a person who is much more comfortable,
with the written word than the spoken, it is a
bit of a harrowing experience. However, if .I
manage to help even one young person find
the same enjoyment in reading that I have had
over the years it's worth every drop of nervous
perspiration.
This is an incipient struggle
Letter to the Editor