The Rural Voice, 2019-07, Page 56Empathy and sympathy are two
very different responses and
farmers working with
employees, or dealing with a person
who is struggling with mental
wellness would do well to learn the
difference.
“Empathy fuels connection and
sympathy drives separation,”
explains Taylor Leitch, a marketing
specialist with crisis help hotline
experience. Leitch works for People
Management Group, a Woodstock
company that offers human resources
and health and safety solutions for
small to medium businesses
including the program Udderly SAFE
for dairy farmers.
Leitch spoke to dairy farmers at
the Stratford Dairy XPO about the
mental health components of Udderly
SAFE and provided some very
practical tips to recognize signs of
mental unwellness and how to help.
The occupation of farming, as a
whole, has many stressors. These
include lack of sleep, weather stress,
lack of control (weather and family)
too much work, money worries and
animal welfare stress. Dairy farmers
may have extra stress from supply
management threats. Social isolation
can also contribute to farm stress.
Statistics indicate 35 per cent of
producers meet the classification for
depression while 45 per cent are
classified as “high stress”. Almost 60
per cent of farmers meet the “anxiety
classification”. Of all the short and
long-term disability claims in
Canada, 30 per cent are due to mental
health problems and illness.
Statistics are clear indicators but
sometimes the signs of mental
unwellness are not. Leitch says it can
begin with a farmer or farm
employee doubting their abilities or
seeming less confident. They may
have a difficult time concentrating,
learning or making decisions.
Attitude changes can be also be
huge indicators of mental
unwellness. These can include:
• social withdrawal
• takes an unusual amount of time
off
• signs of anxiety
• extreme mood swings
• inability to concentrate
• inability to cope with daily stressors
Changes in appearance are also
something to watch for. “If they
come to work and find a hole in their
coveralls and they just break down
crying, well that’s obviously an
overreaction. You know it’s way
beyond the coveralls,” says Leitch.
So how should we respond when
signs indicate someone is struggling
with mental health?
This first thing to do is express
concern WITHOUT making
assumptions, says Leitch. “If a team
member is experiencing any kind of
mental illness, it is their decision as
to how much they want to share with
you.”
The listener needs to let the team
member know they are there to listen
without judgement if they need
someone to talk to. If they decide to
share, that’s the time to use empathy,
not sympathy.
“Empathy is a sacred place. When
someone is in a deep hole, they say ‘I
am stuck, it is dark and I am
overwhelmed’. The empathetic
person will climb down that hole
with them and lie down. The
sympathetic person will look down
the hole and offer them a sandwich,”
explains Leitch.
Never does an empathetic
response start with “at least”.
Example 1: I had a miscarriage
At least you know you can get
pregnant
Example2: I am getting divorced.
At least you had a marriage.
Leith shared a quote from Brene
Brown that states: “If I share
something with you that is difficult, I
would rather you say ‘I don’t know
what to say but I am so glad you told
me.’ Rarely does a response make
things better. The connection makes
it better.”
Following a discussion or
disclosure with a team member, it’s
always best to continue to make that
team member feel as though they are
part of the team and continue to
involve them in regular work
activities, advises Leitch.
If an employer feels they need to
approach a team member, Leitch
provided some tips for starting the
conversation:
• “Over the past few weeks, I have
noticed ______. This concerns me
because _______.
• “I wanted to speak with you about
something I have noticed which is
causing me concern.”
• “I have been made aware of
something that I wanted to speak
with you about, and I just want to
follow up with you.”
• “I understand there is something
you would like to discuss. Start
wherever you are comfortable.”
52 The Rural Voice
Advice
Be empathetic, not sympathetic
Udderly SAFE provides advice on how to encourage and
respond to mental unwellness among farm employees
• By Lisa B. Pot •
Taylor Leitch
Marketing Specialist,
UdderlySAFE