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The Rural Voice, 1993-11, Page 30The Hidden Horror on our Farms Isolation and stress can take a heavy toll in wife -abuse in farm families by Corinne Robertson -Brown Things have been rough lately on the Smith's farm. John has hit his wife in the past, but lately he's been attacking her more often, hiding the car keys on her, and refusing to let hcr talk to her friends. Last week he held her head under a pillow until she nearly suffocated because he found a long distance call to her mother on their telephone bill. His wife is afraid of him all the time, but doesn't know what to do. He is bigger and stronger than she is, and she never knows what will set him off. Think this is an isolated incident? Think again. Although this farm couple described above is fictitious, their situation is very real. Statistics show that one in 10 (some studies suspect as many as one in four) Canadian women are abused by their partners. In 1991, a woman married in Port Elgin was repeatedly shot by hcr husband and survived. But 120 women across Canada that year were not so lucky. They died at the hands of their partners. They were shot, strangled, smothered, or stabbed. Battering, as it is sometimes called, exists everywhere, and the family farm is no exception. Just because you don't hear about it doesn't mean it isn't happening. This appalling secret is beginning to come out of hiding, though. November is Wife Abuse Prevention Month, and public awareness of this vast social problem is increasing, thanks to the tireless work of many people and organizations dedicated to stopping this crime and educating people about it. "People want to deny this problem," says Arlene Timmins, Executive Director of Phoenix Second Stage Housing, and co-chair of co-ordination for Stop Woman Abuse Now (SWAN). SWAN was established in 1990 as a community response to the issue in Huron County. It has a diverse mem- bership, including representatives 26 THE RURAL VOICE Arlene Timmins, Executive Director of Phoenix House of Huron, from police services, community service agencies, the legal profession, the medical community, the ministerial community, the Crown's office, and the community at large. Monthly meetings keep SWAN working on issues relevant to the work of ending woman abuse. One of their initiatives was the compilation of a study of these issues, and involved focusing on the network of services available in Huron County. Interviewers were trained, surveys prepared, and 358 residents of Huron County were interviewed,including men, women, (some survivors of abuse), police, physicians, lawyers, and clergy. Huron County has been described as one of the most rural counties in southwestem Ontario, with over half of the popu ation living outside of the towns and villages, and a large percentage of those rural dwellers living on farms. Even the non -rural centres here are relatively small. This situation poses special challenges to service providers in rural areas, and particular risks to women whose partners are abusive. Many live a long distance from even a small centre, and winter conditions can make travel even more difficult. Women may not know what help is available in their area. Even telephoning for help often means long distance charges, and police response takes much longer than it would in an urban area. The distance from neighbours can be a problem; as one woman said, "There was no one close to hear my cries for help." As well, there is the reality in rural communities that each person's actions are extremely visible, and often "everyone knows everybody else's business." One woman surveyed said, "It is impossible for people to come to the farm without him seeing them (he's there all the time)." This can all make it more difficult for a rural woman to anonymously come forward for service and help. Because of these challenges, Huron County, as well as Perth and Grey -Bruce, have a network of . essential services in place, and they are particularly sensitive to the needs of farm women. They often have toll-free telephone numbers, transportation, and many specialized services which include shelters, groups, and programs for both women and men. (See sidebar.) first, some definitions. The terms "wife assault" or "wife abuse" are used when a man hurts or threatens a woman he is in a relationship with. It can include sexual assault and emotional abuse. It is against the law. Contrary to what people sometimes believe, it is every bit as illegal to assault a wife or partner as to assault a total stranger. Women have the right to be safe. Why does a man batter? Researchers believe that it is because he wants to have control and power over his partner. He may believe that he has the right to control his wife. He may have learned that violence in the home is okay. He may feel powerless and unable to handle the problems in his life. Also, in the past, it was easy for men to "get away with" abusing women. Why do some women stay with