The Rural Voice, 1981-04, Page 42GISELE IRELAND
Redecorating
and cabin fever
Something happens to level headed ladies at this time of year
that turns them into viragos armed with wallpaper. A lot has to
do with "cabin fever" and the urge to rearrange the nest. If
spouses had any grey cells in their noodles. they would book a
trip out of the country at this time.
invariably this trimming of the living quarters is a
do-it-yourself project. in the country it is as hard to find interior
decorators as dandruff on a bald guy. Even if you could find one.
you couldn't afford it. So this leaves the members of the family to
pick on. Guess who her beady little eyes usually light on? Right
on; the mate. Convincing him ripping apart the various rooms is
a necessity is something short of a miracle. No man wants to
sleep on a mattress in the hall for a couple of nights while wifey
does the transforming routine. Even less does a pian want to be
involved with wallpaper or paint. To get participation in this
endeavour, you must threaten. coerce or frankly blackmail him
into agreeing. Most women find this done best behind closed
doors. Myself, I call it the barter system. Nobody gets anything
for nothing.
Once you've got hint where you want him, preferably on the
top of the step ladder with a couple of sheets of soggy paper
draped around his neck. you realize you've made the worst
mistake of your married life. By now, you have just about conic
to blows because the job is not as easy at it looks; the husband
has just got the third sheet of ceiling paper wrapped around his
ears. his foot is soaking wet from stepping into the water trough
and his set of clothes are ruined from pasting himself against a
newly painted door. You're finding it hard to tell him how
wonderful he is because the third strip of paper is upside down
and he suddenly developed the disposition of a rattlesnake. If
you like the fact he warms your sheets at night you'll stop right
there. Any further is instant divorce. At best, it will take you two
weeks to speak to each other in a civil manner.
If you have opted out of this redecorating duo by now, you arc
left with what looks like a week-long bachelor party. Now you
have to find a sympathetic friend to give you a hand. Chances are
that there are a couple of dozen of them in exactly the sank
dilemma right now. You'll have lots to choose from. You swear
that never again will you, tackle a job like this and you know
you're lying because you said the same thing last year. If your
marriage weathers this even a blond, stacked bombshell couldn't
budge your solid foundation.
At last, when everything is back to normal, and he is calling
you honey again, instead of "dine donut." you feel pretty good.
Make a mental note for next year, and when you've got hint
behind closed doors and he doesn"t know jello from shoe polish,
ask hint for a mink coat.
May 6
MINI HOME SEWING SHOW
AND FASHION SHOW
Afternoon Performance 1:30
Evening Performance 7:30
Central Huron Secondary School
Tickets $3.S0 - Students $2.00
Tickets available al Mary's Sewing Centre
All proceeds to Cancer Society
MARY'S SEWING CENTRE
Clinton
17 Victoria St.
482-7036
SUPEP PECE
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Featuring exclusive
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FOR PERFECTION
IN RECEPTION
ALSO FEATURING: Delhi Tower Sales and installation.
With a full line of Boosters and Rotors in stock to suit your
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ft T
ANTENNA
Sales £t Service
Brian McAshVarna
Or if no answer call
482-7129 482-7157
THE RURAL VOICE/APRIL 1981 PG 41