The Lucknow Sentinel, 1983-05-25, Page 18news
Lucknow Sentinel, Wednesday, May 25, 1983—Page 18
Women Today workshop discusses shelters for battered wives
She could be the woman across the room
from you at a party. Maybe she lives next
door, or ott a farm on the next concession.
She could even be you. She's 18 or she's 50.
No matter what her age or where she lives,
her life is probably in danger. She's a
battered woman.
If national trends hold true, one in 10
women in Huron County is beaten by the
man she lives with,
Some women who have been beaten;
others who are involved with shelters and
support groups locally and a man who used
to beat his wife got together in Ooderich
May 16 to talk about the problem. The
workshop on wife battering was the final one
in a series sponsored by Women Today,
In answer to one woman's comments,
"I can't understand why women who are
beaten stay with their husbands, put up with
it, won't go to the police and lay a charge;"
other women explained that a woman who is
beaten is terrified,
The man who is abusing her physically is
also telling her she's nothing and she loses
her self-confidence, families often encour-
age a woman who's being abused to "put up
with it," A sort of learned helplessness
comes into play and the victim thinks some-
how the beatings are her fault, The man is
loving and remorseful after the incidents and
the victim thinks "next time will be differ-
ent."
If you're being beaten and think it's your
own fault, there's a tremendous guilt and
shame. You don't ask for help because you
don't want anyone to know about the
beatings.
"Women have been beaten up to 35 times
before making that initial telephone call for
help," Debbie Buttjevak of Women's Com-
munity House, a shelter for battered women
and their children in London.
The house, which has hosted 400 battered
women in five years of operation, has space
for 14 women and children at one time. That
only scratches the surface of the need. "For
every family we house we have to turn away
two."
A similar shelter, the Huron County Crisis
Centre, opened this month near Hayfield. It
has been used by battered women already,
explained board member Lynn Smith.
Optimism House, a new shelter in Stratford,
is now open to women and their children in
Perth County and surrounding areas, the
co-ordinator, Muriel Steel, saki. 'It has four
staff members and has just trained a first
group of volunteers. More are needed.
Many battered women stay in a violent
Book sale at Blyth June 4-5
Huron County's largest
book sale on June fourth and
fifth is more than the sale of
thousands of books, maga-
zines and records at bargain
prices, Musk and storks,
readings, puppet shows, arts
and crafts, tours, baked
goods, and a snack counter
make it a weekend of great
family entertainment.
On Sunday at 2 Harry J,
Boyle will delight audiences
with readings from his
books, Boyle was born just a
few miles from Blyth in St.
Augustine, and his play
Mostly in Clover opened the
Blyth Summer Festival's first
season in 1915, Boyle worked
for CKNX for 10 years before
joining the CBC as a farm
commentator in 1942. in his
long association with the
CBC he produced and direct-
ed many programs. In 1916
he was appointed Chairman
of the CRTC.
Harry Boyle had been
twice recipient of the Steph-
CLEARRI'NG AUCTiON SALE
Farm Maehhtery, Household Effects and Real Estate
will be held for
MRS. MARION HARRIS AND THE ESTATE OF
THE LATE EARL HARRIS
Lot 3, con, 7, Kinloss Township
2 miles west of Holyrood or 4 miles east of Ripley
on
SATURDAY, MAY 28 at 10130 A.M.
FOUIPMLNT
1001 Choy 1/2 ton 'truck with 27,000 orig. miles,
selling as is; Ailla Chalmers tractor with Freeman
loader; W4 McCormick Deering, tractor; 2 furrow trail
plough; 9' Int. wheal cultivator; 3 sections of drag
harrows and pots; 7' Int, pull type mower; steal lire
sIde delivery rake; rubber tired manure spreader; t1112
A.C. lawnmower with tiller; snowblower and chains; 4
cycle Clinton garden 1111er; garden tractor troller;
deluxe Artisan lawnmower; quantity of tools, forks end
shovels; Jaekall wood splitter with 6 hp, motor; buzz
saw; fanning mill; 3 McCullough chain saws; table saw;
boring maohlne; 2 iron kettles; harness; platform
scales,
GUNS
2 - 30/30 Winchester rifles; double barrel shot gun; 22
semi automatic rifle; pellet gun with scope; 12 gauge
(Jump shot gun; 22 calibre revolver; Flrsarms
acquit,; lion certificate required for purchase of guns.
HOUSEHOLD EFFECTS
IAppr',it. 12:30 to 1:00 p.m.J Chesterfield; hide -a -bed
couch; Sherlock Manning piano and bench; parlour
table; library table; antique secretary desk; wooden
Mick n table with extensions end 6 chairs; china
ceblt At; Frigidaire refrigerator; quantity of dishes and
cooking utensils; bedroom sults, bed, dresser and chest
of drawers; wood bed and mattress; steel bed and mat-
tress; washstands; chests of drawers; quilts and bed-
ding; New Haven 30 hour wall clock; coal oil lamps; el-
ectric White sewing machine and cabinet; (riddle sew-
ing machine; other articles too numerous to mention.
PEAL ESTATE
Lot 2, cora. 0, f<Iniosu Twp, consisting of 100 acres with
barn. Approx. 00-05 acres workable, 5 acres of bush.
TEAMS ON REAL ESTATE 15% DOWN DAY
OF SALE AND BALANCE IN 80 DAYS
TERMS CASH ON MACHINERY AND HOUSEHOLD
IFI ECTS DAY OF SALE
Selling subject to a ?armorial/Is reserve bid
1 (IN( 1{ H3()()1 ti ()N (,ROUNDS
EXECUTOR: ('ASH$ER:
STUART JAMIESON WAYNE JAMIESON
4t1(110 JFE-;RS:
Grant McDonald, Ripley, 195-5153
Wallace Hallagh, Teeswater, 392-6170
en Leacock Medal for Hum-
our.
On Saturday at 2 Edna
Staebler will read from her
new book, Whatever Hap.
pened to Maggie. Mrs.
Staebler is the author of two
weeks on Mennonite country
cooking: Food That Really
Schmecks and More Food
that Really Schmecks.
Both authors wilt gladly
autograph their books so
bring your own copies along.
Turn to page 19.
home because they have no where else to go.
By providing shelter (women can stay a
month or six weeks) they give women who
are beaten time to think, to take stock of
their lives without interference. Counselling
is available but jttst as important is the
chance to learn you are not alone and to talk
to other women who have been battered.
There are people who understand to share
your story with, people who don't judge,
people who believe you, You can try and
figure out why the man's background led
him to beat you up, one woman said.
Sometimes there is no why, another woman
replied. "He becomes something unhum-
an."
Security precautions at Women's Com-
munity House include a locked door with a
one way glass window and not giving out
information about who is in residence.
If a battered woman decides to leave, the
staff of a shelter can help her through the
courts, the welfare system, the maze of often
unsympathetic bureaucracy she'll come up
against. Laying an assault charge against
her husband, one woman said, was "the
biggest decision of my life," bigger than
deciding to marry.
Because society sees the family as sacred,
something that must be kept together at all
costs, family violence is not condemned.
"Many helpers make it harder for women to
leave and encourage her to go back home,"
one participant said,
The judicial system cooperates in this
co-ercion to keep a woman who is beaten in
her home, the man who was a former wife
beater said. "She's got nothing, her
husband persuades her" and most women
lack information about their rights and how
to get support for their children and
themselves,
Courts are too lenient when a woman
finally does charge her husband with
assault. (The London police are one of the
few forces in Canada which will lay charges
against wife beaters; in most centres the
woman herself must lay charges). "They tap
a man's wrist and send him home. They
THE WINGHAM SALES ARENA
The Wfngham Soles Arena
A PLEASANT PLACE TO SHOP WHERE COUNTRY
AND CITY FOLK MEET"
Just North of Wingham on Highway 114
Tremendous Savings from Our Fine Bulk
Display & Discount Groceries
Many items are pre packed for your convenience. All
types of bulk rookies, bulk spices, bulk candy, bulk ple
fillings, baking goods, discount prices on canned
goods, etc, If you are planning a wedding, a party or
enjoy home baking this bulk place Is for you!
New and Used Furniture and Antiques
Quality, durable solid wood furniture in the latest
styles, dining room, living room, bedroom and kitchen
furniture all at prices you can afford. Also a gond
selection of used furniture and antiques.
Carpet and No Wax Flooring
Carpet remnants, roill ends, and complete rolls, bring in
your room sires, install your self or we will install the
carpet for you. The savings on our carpet will floor you!
REMEMBER NO SALES TAX ON FLOORING.
Clothing and Footwear for the Whole Family
All at fantastic savings. Work clothing - coveralls, for
men and boys, also kids sizes, work pants, socks,
shirts, N1 safety worl, shoes, rubber boots In a full
range of sizes, Jogging suits, jogging shoes, blue jeans,
the areas fines selection of blue Jeans by famous
designer* and manufacturers.
Sporting Goods, Tools, Giftware
Guns, new and used, ammunition, scopes, knives,
binoculars, fishing gear, tools, come in and hunt
yourself a bargain and reel in the savings.
NOTE!! We will buy, take on consignment, or auction
gond used furniture, guns, antiques, complete or
partial households.
THE % INGHAM SALES ARENA 357-1730
Open Mon. to Sat. 9 - 6 p.m. Fri. 'Nights till 9 p.rn.
TERMS - (-ASH, CHEQUES, %ISA
OR MASTER CARD
THE WINGHAM SALES ARENA
don't make him get help," said the woman
who did charge her husband.
The group saw the National Film Board
documentary "Loved, Honoured and Bruis-
ed" about a woman with five children who
finally left her husband after years of
beatings.
The husband, a rather timid man,
explained in the film that beating his wife
was like disciplining the children: "You do it
because you love them." Saving that he
shied away from conflict with the outside
world, the husband said when he's under
pressure, he takes it out on "the closest
person at hand."
Although she and her children faced an
eight -mile walk to the nearest town, the
woman left her farm home because she
feared for their lives. She had thought no
one knew about her constant beatings, but a
neighbour picked the family up on the road,
saying "I've been watching the house, I've
been worried about you." After a stay in a
shelter, the woman and the children have
started a life on their own in Winnipeg.
Getting to that stage of independence isn't
easy. One woman at the workshop praised
London police and their family crisis teams,
and a Salvation Army woman who explains
the court system in that city. "It would be
nice if Goderich had someone like her."
"Help in a small town is zero," another
said. "My so-called friends wouldn't go to
court with me." In another beating
situation, police wouldn't testify for the
victim and a Justice of the Peace was no
help. Others were threatened by their
husbands in an attempt to have them drop
charges.
Some of the sources of help for abused
women in this area are:
Shelters for battered women and their
children: (Most are open 24 hours a clay):
Huron County Family Crisis Centre 482-
7988; Optimist House, Stratford, 271-5550;
Women's Community House, London 439-
4543; Huron Centre for Children and
Youth, Clinton (family, marital and child-
ren's counselling at no charge) 482-3931.
53 ACRES • 45 workable, 7th Culross Township.
175 ACRES • Kinloss, farrow to finish set up, 15 acres
hardwood, Terms negotiable.
100 ACRES • Kinloss, 60 workable with excellent atone
house, all refurbished, barn and double garage, Very
scenic,
178 ACRES • Kinloss, 140 workatble, 10 acres good
hardwood, good house, 2 barna and implement shed, 30
cow tie up, with milking equipment, Financing at 7% to
approved purchaser.
100 ACRES • Huron Township, 91 workable and well
drained, good house and barn with automatic feeder,
large Implement shed,
237 ACRES • Ashfield Township, 100 acres needs
draining, good buildings, excellent financing. at 10
1/8%,
186 ACRES - Ashfield Township, new 3 bedroom home
with drilled well, gond barn, 55 acres fall wheat,
Vendor will hold mortgage at good Interest rate.
100 ACMES • Ashfield Township, level dairy tarn, 55
row tie up with cows and cream quota available, Vender
will hold mortgage,
100 ACRES - Ashfleld Township, --60 acres workable
with good buildings, house all redecorated, good hard-
wood bush. Vendor will hold mortgage.
CONVERTED SCHOOL HOUSE - 1 acre, large mature
maples, near St, Helens,
LUCKNOW - 3 bedroom home with attached garage in
good location.
LUCKNOW - 4 bedroom home with large garage
attached, paved driveway, reduced to 536,000.
ST. HELENS - 3 bedroom home with large living room
and fireplace on good lot, Price reduced.
WHiTECHUNCH - brick building, could be 3 apart.
meats, 2 baths, new combination all -wood furnace,
Reduced to sell.
ASHFJELD TOWNSHIP - niee country home on 2 acres,
drilled well, fruit trees, well iandseaped. Priced to sell,
for further information on these and other properties
please call
FRASER MacKINNON DAVID MacI1NNON
-195- 2RRa 395-2483
HARRY '19cD0"4AGfi
528-3821