The Exeter Times-Advocate, 1931-03-12, Page 34
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ME EXETER TIMES-A5VOCATE Thor y, Much 12, 3#31
"The Survival
•of the Fattest"
afsseme_.•
Lucreshus Mabry threw back hie
bead and preelainted to the world
in a seedy baryteue that he Wee el-
INft).'s blgwing bulibleS;
They fly $o high,
Might' itigh tech the skyl
Then like a dream
They bust en' ale,
The, 'trent wheels of the delivery
track, which be was piloting collid-
• ed violently with as _excessively Mtge
rock and the ear stewed druukenly.
The leaven crates of ducks compris-
ing the pessenger list se t up- a un-
animous quackery of protest, 14-
e reshus righted the car with a deft
twist o1 the ,steering wheel Ana
Shook hie bead; "MOO nigh 'Wet -
ea Ondied ray ownse'f that time,"
The road 'curved sharply to the
light and ,Lecresaus pressed three
seconds ahead of a New Orleans 'ex -
Press. He grinned cheerfully. -"Lu-
creshus 1\'Iairry1 ie naidecb, "luelt
she' ain't .ag'in you teklaye That
N'Yavtins train elle' thought they
was gwine be -one mo' oullud angel
answer' the call on high."
But the narrow escape had caused
a (Slight let -down in the Mabrian
ex-
uberance. Noenare did the raucous'
barytone split the .clear warm .air
,..ef the June morning. Lucreelini
gave himself over to the business. of
driving his truck. He had been as-
signed to chaperon :seven crates of
4ucks, from Birmingham"to l3eSSe-
nier, and he, entertained n over-
whelming desire to beceme a corpse
en route.
As for the (.111cics, they were bliss-
fully ignorant of the tate in stoxe
for them. The morning was pleae-'
ant and the road generally goad.
What the clucks did not know was
that a street fair had appeared in
Bessemer the previous day and that
they were destined for the sacrificial
.altar at one of the many raffling
Wheels. ‘.
The duck idea -was always poen,
jar: "Three ,chances, for ten cents,.
gents and ladies. You _give me your
dime 'and I gives you a tioket con-
taining three numbers. Then I
gives the little wheel a spin and
somebody wins a fine liye duck eor
t en cents.' Think of ,it, gents and
ladies—a fine roast duck for a dine!
One little thin dime. & Canadian
dime if you insist. Knock the old
H. C. of L. In the, head and .*atch it
duck. A duck /or a dime:"
The duck man had a good 'Conces-
sion. On the first ay e of the 'street
fair he had ,been,..nnablk to 'obtain
diteks and had managed to ,,reinrie
air.diviaands..to.hinmelf with some
chickene and -a few Torn geese. But
a duck has infinitely lnore class than
a chicken and is better understood
than a geese, which was the reason
why the owner of tat particular con -
.,cession bad kept the telephone wires
hot—at ten tents 1..ier heart --be-
tween Bessemer and Birmingham.
Eventually he swung a deal Ifor
seven crates of duck. The selling
firm was that Morris Avenue concern
-which claimed distinction by reason
Olf the name "Lboreshas Mabry" on
RS pay roll. tAnd to the very •stout
-toloradomaduro-Complexioned Lucre -
bus had been instrusted the task,
of delivering the ducks before ten -
thirty a.m.
He negotiated the thirteen merci-
ful miles which seperate the first
and fourth cities of Alabama in'
lightly Ime than illty minutes, nar-
rowly avoided extinction by an ar-
gunient. with a Jonesboro street car
and swung at length into the broad
street which .pridefully displayed the
street fair.* '
He brought his truck to a full
stop and stared reminiscently at the
double row of once -white tents--
niCkel-snatching crevices and aristo-
eratic two-bit attractions.
Spread out before him were the
Wor'ruId ramous DiVin' Girls; The
Wild West Dance Bally pay a nickel
and you dance with the lady which
you chooses; The Old Plantation
Minstrels; The Wild West Show;
The Only 'Original Hele,, Dancers,
Mier also doing the shimmy; The
itfotikey SpeedWay; The Miniature
City; the...notordromeL and last
and wealthiest, the score of booths
-*here everything frau kewpiee to
ducks wad 'raffled.
Lueeeehus remembered. F'ar back
in the dim and distant past 'Whorl he
bad bean very small and vett, color-
ed and very jobless, he had *forked
for five hectic Months with a street
far concession. 'Hie task had been
to•sit On a tiny platforre which was
suspended by on upright over a tub
AV cold and extremely wet water
There was a net in .frOnt of him ead
Before the net a target Which 'WM
connected by a trigger arrangement
to the 'platforni On Whia 11t1 LW-
oreenee at Thirty feet diStant
Wag a beg, and in that hot two score
theap baseballs. -The price *as
ticket—for titres shelts; the techtlie
difficult was tatietying. It *Ms
Merely a ob.Se of throWitig with we-
ficient accUrecy. That done, and
the target hit, the trigger *biked
And Lucteshits Was precipitated into
the icy shallows beloly.
Tt wag a fine thing fbr 064y,viiet
Ot the benteditsidn aria the person
leaving thbflsebafls 14o Um-
41,
a
ilia it had brOttght no Surge Of -pc--
stagy and but very littlemore than
three Ineals a day. But it did bring
him pneumonia, Be stood, for that,
but when shortly .after 'his Mile net
split wide open and a ball .Careseed
btra bi tise e'e T4it4resbus struck,
Bl s stile was aliccesettd. he re,
tired permanently from the street -
fair prOfessien, was that when
the fair passed on to Rome, GeerSia,
Lucreehue borrowed a ride in' an
otherwise empty ibo x car and mime,'
ed to Eilrininghain.
And there „he had since remained,
tinat, mellowing the recollection of
his watery trials and tribulations and
affording him ,no little distinction
end a considerable fund of
iemin-
lscence as he made his way upwerd.
Be was now most decidedly
man of parts, a dark'brewn individ-
ual of acute dighity, .sial ease,
sporting proclivities, ample girth
and matrimonial tendencies, Attain-
ment positton had come only af-
ter years of patient labor, but there
Is no denying a man with the .qual-
ity Nof persistence demonstrated by
Lucreshus in holding a job with a
single firm for five years; and who,
with such •professional stability, car-
ried sufficient cunning in the -fingers
of his right hand to roil ,sevens with
uplifting and chronic :frequency.
And nntil very ;recently Lucreshue
had been hot on the trail of an ul-
timate social triumph. He laid ar-
dent and .almost successful court to'
Miss Zinnia Sanders, and until the.
arrival on the scene of the loungy,
languid Angel Nash—
Lucreshus sighed ponderously and
brought himself back to the task in
band. Immediately in his rear
seven. crates of ducks cluadIced vel-
.ubly for attention. Lucreshus light-
ed and waddled down the street, He
'found the duck man without partic-
ular ti•ouble, checked over with him
the number of prospective duck din-
ners and received payment in cash.
Within a short time the ducks were
unloaded and placed within the
raffle liootll in preparation for the
opening of the fair at two o'clock in
the afternoon for the second day Of
its week's sojourn. •
At the present moment, however,
the street fair lounged '.rie torpid
desuetude. Perforiners, either' with-
out mak-up or else with'entirely. too
much of it, loafed before their tents
swapping .gossip which was saturat-
ed with a vernacular that Lucreshus
thoughtshe had forgotten, but which
now came ;back to :' him in a pIefieur-
able flood. lie'remenibered his ex-
pthences af many years ago). He
intercepted a large and burly gentle-
men who was headed north and tra-
velling fast.
• "Boss man?" -
'The big fellow .paused and eyed
the fat and dusky Luceoshus. 'What
yo want.
"Is you got a base-ball-th'owan'
concession rouif 'this heah fair?"
• "Yes." The ,burly ono jerked his
head in the direction or the far end
of the midway. "Down yonder."
Lucreshus rambled heavilY down
the Middle 'of She street, which Muni-
cipal authorities had cl•osed to 'traf-
fic for the week. Every once in a
while he paused and reflected, There
were Certain things that were start-
Ingly familiar., Of course Lucreshue
knew that all travelling;street fairs
are more or less alike, but there
was something about that pink-silk-
shirted spot -the -spot man, for in-
stance; and the battered red -and -
gold front of The Old Plantation
Minstrels.
He reached the, 6nd of the mid-
way ----and then he knew. His was
the beattitude of ,sthe successful man
who returns to the village of his
bo3rhood and meets the chap who
once whipped him; meets him In hi
natural guise of the village loafer,
For there at the hight of the mid-
way was the very same platform tip -
on which Lucresue ,had sat many
yeeks !before; the platform which
had fallen before the onsaughts of
light baseballs in good weather and
bad, in hot 'Weather and colcl. And
leafing by its side perusing a thamb-
ed copy of a; large, trade paper was
Al Ressler.
It *as the same old concession,
and yet it was different. The tank
was larger and -wetter; the counter
had been painted a bilious green and
decorated with gold and silver. But
the net—tlle .saine hole was there;
the very hole through which had
shot the ball that had expunged Lu-
creshus from the roster of the cam-
bial, Of Course there was a patch
over the heleil! and a good many,
patches 'elsetyliete, ibut ,oVeit at that
the years had treated it More kind
ly than Al Roesler,
Al Wee Punchier,. and though the
dialtend in his ring was larger and,
the .silk of his fiery shirt ef Mere'
substantial tektttre, Lucreshus felt 6,
genet) Of. stipenority. even eci he had
ftertillets for hie Old employer, Al
nossier'—bigi bltiff geed -natured Al
uncanny itildeletandieg of
hfs dusky brethren and it was with
real pleasure that he :greeted lth ex.
employee,
l'or lialf an hOUr they retrospetted
two old showmen come
together again,
auLaupiCir0
,,,esetillig ttehlatIt tac ch00111:fftione4hi:
alettg" With his sabetential entbon,,,
Peint, aA Mr, Roaster confeSee4
that he was becoming fairly well fix
ed in this world's goods.
'Were you Is been ,ebowin' at
recint, Idistpll1-lossler?z'
Rosser checked, U. "41niley last
week, Gadsdeu the week 'before,
Chattanooga before that, And Just
before" going to Chattanooga we had
wonerful. three weekil in KnoXe
Lucreshus vilackled,
"iisueadtin'at;-
lenty bouten Knox-
ville Iriglit recint,"
aHow,ah
"The cullud ball team from Knox-
ville is playin' in Buminia'ham now,
le gwine win a heap of motley out -
en this ,serlas,'
"Betting on tile egratiligham• ?"
"Yon done said it, boss, -We, is
got the bestes' cullud team which
they is in the South. :VVe win yes,
tiddy'e game one to nothin' in Pleven
tMr, Rossler laughed in good na-
tured dkision,
"I was in Knoxville for three
weeks, Luke---"
"They calls me Lucreshus now,-
Wfistuli Ressler.
The white- man' race remained
impassive, " I was there .for three•
weeks, .Luerehus; and I saw two ser-
ies .of games played by the Knoxville'
team. They beat Nashville and won
two out 'of five from Athinta,„...At-
lanta beat the Birmingham team
three out of lottr—H
"We is a'ready win the 'fust game
or the series from Knoxville, Mistuh,
Rossler; an' winn' another one ain't
gwine be nothin' on'y ,chil'e play."
"You may be a good truck driver,
Luhe—er----Lucreshus, but as a dope;.
Eder you're nix, The Knoxville team
lost the series to Atlanta by a Mita
They can beat )3irmingham without
half trying."
"You ain't know what yoeis
taik-
in' sub. Beatin' teams liken
to this Knoxville team is the easiest
thing we does."
"You're not willing to bet that
way, are you?"
"Ain't I les.? I is donesbet ey'ry
cent I c'e beg or berry on t'day's
game."
"Better hedge, Lucreshus. You
haven't a chance."
"Ain't got a chance to lose! Lis'en
heah, ,boss man. lin you seen that
series betwix' Knoxville an' Atlanta,
does you 'member a Atlanta pitcher,
named Angel Nash. A soht of a lep-
sided feller with six gold teeth?"
Ressler laughed. "Nobody could.
forget him. He's a corker."
Lucreshus looked round cautiouoly,
and lowered his voice. "We is got:
him!"
"Angel Nash?"
"You said it, bols. We hired:,
him bouten two weeks ago to pitch'
two games outen th'ee Knox-
ville. Be is ben practicin' with us
sauce then. An', believe me, he is
got mo' speed'n4a cyclone an' better
control '11 a preacher. What he
pitches s named baseball. Mr nei-
ther he di'n't pitch yestiddy, 'count -
in' we was savin' bine tip fa' the last
two games. He is gwine to twirl t� -
day and to-morry, au' what we is.
gwine ..clo to that Knoxville team
gwine inake 'ern feel 'bout as happy
as a man clrawin' his las' will an'
testimony." •
Ressler shook his head stubborn-
ly. "A. pitcher can't win the game
alone. The Whole Knoxville team
is:good. And their • new pitcher is
even. ;better than Angel Nash."
"Says which?"
"The Knoxville pitcher is even bet-
ter than Angel Nash."
"Haw!" responded Lucreshus with
ponderous sarcasm.- they's any
pitcher in the world better'n Angel,
Ise a blushin' blond."
Al Rossler laughed heartily. 'Same '
old Luke, aren't you, Lucreshus? I
know this much—I'd like to lay fifty
at even on Knoxville for to -day's
game."
"Huh! Tlia's 'bout the easies'
thing -which they is."
With a single deft motion Al Ros-
sler produced a bulging wallett, from'
which lie extracted five tea -dollar
bills. "Take this with you and
place it for me—on Knoxville."
"You ain't in moles', boss man?"
• "I ant."
Luereshuso'extended a restraining
hand. "Done capqi; don' go, an' 'do
nothin! foolish liken to that. If'n
yo' money is Jos' nachelly Wain' a
hold in yo' pocket Online it. Bet -
tin' agin the team which Vie is got
is'btal 'toughy lbUt when we also is
got Aiigel Nash tO pita to' us this
'afterneorian' done beat sem yestiddy
'thoriteri him—they mus' ,be Sum-.
thin' in the Alabama air, Cap`ii Ros-
ier, ,which 18 dime went to. yo' haid.':
But Al Roesler ,was insistent.
had seen the Knoxville colored teafn
play and had unbounded -Confidence'
in its naivete, hi the end he foreed
Lucreshus te 'take the Meney. Lu-.
crealrall Sighed. :"1 -Wish X had
'nettgli 'Morley to eoVer it my owiisel:
"haven't you?"
"Lis'ett heah at ine, Cap`ii
Ras-
s1er Wit they's a nickel in all of!
tininmin'hant which- is gittable, by:
ine an' Which same T ain't done got,
then ,don't know it. An' it's all
bet ba Birtelathein to Win this at-
terneetVo They ain't nary
thande, "" Thee why I hates
to:tee 'ft"way yo' money ;
NOW
girlerveloto, 11111hrout
inraismowilioiiiort
and ',e,„•••"/
In ALIA_ models
off the
•
by
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IVIcLaughlin-Buick's Torque Tube
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A GENERAL MOTORS VALUE
Ulric Snell, Exeter
01•1•=11
liken to this. Now you take me: ZURICH
Gawd knows 1 hates Angel Nash---"
"Hate him?"
(Continued next weelf)
AHOWER, FOR BlIIDE-ELECT
The Mimes Jean Fotheringham•
and Dorothy Robins gave a miscel-,
laneou,s shower at the ho -me of Mr,
and Mrs. William Chapman, Bruce -
field, in honor of their daughter,
Marion. The evening was spent in
games and contests, after which a
dainty lunch:was served. The girls
then, departed, wishing the bride-
tabe much happiness.
The home of Mr, and Mrs. J. W.
Hodgins, Biddulph, was the scene Of
a happy event when neighbors and
friends met to, de honor- on the oc-
,casion of7their twenty-fifth anniver-
sary of thell..yavedding„. day..
evening was sient" in euchre and
dancing during which Mr. and Mrs.
Hodgins were presented With 'two
beautiful oak chairs with IVrisa Mary
Paterson at the Dien° all sang
heartily, "For he's a jolly good fel-
low."
Miss Louisa Rarig, .of Kitchener,
'is Visiting with friends in town.
Mrs. J. Facey, of Tavistock, Is
visiting with her sister, Mrs. Geo.
Clausius who is quite 111.'
Mr. and ales. Seth 'Amens, of
Stratford, visited with friends for
the week -end, the latter rmainiuG
for a week.
Mr. Albert 'Schwalm, Who spent a
couple of weeks with his parents
and other relatives has returned to
his home in HumbOlt, Sask,
iOne evening recently while Mr.
and Mrs. Simon Greb and Mrs. L.
Geiger were enjoying a: cutter ride
the cutter become entangled in a
rut overturning the mine with the
result that the 6Ccupants were
thrown ont on the hard fee but 110
one was hurt. • •
ElaterOeech.ennt a f11.n,,d4y,.
(xi elie-Tandoir'Itliseiltal recalitlY
'Where he was taking treatment.
Mr. Ebner Clausius and sister Mrs.
Facey, of TaYistock were visitors at
the home of their mother Mrs. Geo.
Clausius during the past week.
Mr. and Mrs. Proctor, of Goderich,
'were in town receutly where .it IS
understood they intend ttp become
residents of Zurich by occupying the
dwelling property now occupied by
Mr. J. C. Salmon.
Mr. Wm. Lamont had the misfor-
tune recently to tall -and fracture a
rib while coming out of the house of
Mr. Harry McClinchey, of the Gosh-
en Line, •Stanley.
Mr. Sandy Elliot,. of Exeter, has
made arrangements with Mr. L.-,
Prang for servicing the Ford cars
and Mt. E. Wuerth 'will again be
the local salesman for this -district.
The little daughter of Mr. and
Mrs. Ed. Hartman, of the Bronson.
Line, Stanley, and who was taken
to the London Hospital for treat-
ments, is improving nicely.
GOOD -BY
SORTHATS
If,Sybilla Spahr's remedy is applied.
Also for cough, whooping -cough,
quinsy, tonsilitis, croup, colds,
throat and tonsil troubles, it's good
medicine. Try it: Exeter and Hen -
sail Druggists.
r"
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4
Frank Tylor, Exeter, Ont.
a