HomeMy WebLinkAboutThe Wingham Advance, 1902-03-06, Page 5OSHAWA MIRACLE
18 EXPLAINED.
How a Remarkable Case of
Paralysis Was Cured.
THE MOST INTERESTING
MAN IN CANADA.
Joseph Brown Attracts Atten-
tion of Physicians, Scien-
tists, fists and Sick People.
Wroln the Mall and I iupire) ,
i Oshawa, Ont., Feb, 21. -Joseph
Brown, whose ease was fully report,
ell in the Melt and Empire some days
ago, seems to be the most talked -of
send written -about man in Canada.
Ile is in receipt daily of many lot-
• teas from all over the Dominion.
I'liyslcians and staentists, as well as
f!iek people, write him, and many
and often amusing questions are
asked. To all Mr. Brown answers:
"I have given my sworn Htatemont,
and It tells my story. Do<ld's Kidney
Pine cured me. and that after I had
been partially paralyzed and unable
to move for over tour months, and
given up by many doctors,"
.elany people have been puzzled as
to.11aw a kidney medicine can cure
paralysis, This is easily under-
stood tylion It is remembered that
the kidney poison, which is the direct
result of kidney weakness, 1e most
paflto batt0lm; a rrtiJlstl0 HprkLy of
<ms+Mils On the stle of tete bodice
Made a finish. For a "younger" cos-
tume, 1 Waw , •
A iDelicious Arrangement
of cream 'satin ribbnn, spotted with
gold the eize of puts, ,lltertl ting,
witlJ #renals filet lave, the fruu-frou,
on which the rihbouo reetod at the
edge of the tltirt, being of gald-
epangletl white tulle, 08011 ribbon
ending In n gold "dandle-ilanglts"
The high eoreele.t belt wits nI gold
tiesrm, and the tiny globe -Bete 1 -lee Ota
of the ore lm• satin rihbot' p ;tae. out
by the eplu1,leit tulle A. tiny gol,l-
topped ni :reboot fe•ttlter no idea over
eh' calf lure. Vo.- 0 hoz rinallltr Ira - l g.
any pretty chine aro atle l or done.
patiaur rations tatty Ir. use 1 ; or rib-
llon velvet,. netertuating with lace
hie o a 0ItarinillUl; effect. Spmetiln's,„
the urttlerttreeo ie of pile -lined silk, 1
teeelarding with tit:' toner) in the. rib -
bong and showing up the pattern of
the Ince wl:h telling.e'feet. The tops,
et the ekirts are fitte:l closely with
tln,v pleatl•1 In the I'toe, tett: backs lone
Ing usu'lly gal It red, kL, a little; full.
mats does pot look tint es 111 811011 airy
Jnaterialki U'hf'p.lritt•'t,1i n1'; Is totihalve
1 be ribbons well tot out at the Lclttont
by ',their; lapwing on innumerable
"frellles," otherwise they lose thole! .
cachet, tutu fellatio, Or nigntlet Lea,
make. a pretty finish to the loops.
For this, yet, marabaut, or pearls
may be used, whichever goes beet
JOSd:?II BROWN. 1:•L h the ribbon, worn with a Flinn -
Oki tulle to}jue.
;4
For amnrt i'e'stuarant diviners tiro
favorite tulle toque lute a bunch of ,
cherries as Its note of cheeses. Not
the fruit we used on our slimmer
llea(lgear---witieli was ,wont to look
so temptingly edible -but jet, gold
or pearl el.erriee, They m Ike a cheer- j
destructive to ail healthy tissue and
nerve.
Seventy-five per cent. of nil ocr-
vous diseases, paralysis and brain
troubles is directly caused by weak
klclneys, allowing- violent potions to
escape through tile system to de-
range and destroy. t
Dodd's Kidney Pills, by correcting
the action of the kidneys, encourage
these natural filters of the blood to
extract ant expel the poisons, thus
removing the cause of many of these
dangerous ailments, which are not
generally spoken of as kidney dial
eases.
ki'0100$109apvvooti/stolaq,04,4944,04.i,,ti-o$`izowtom$40 -0,-00viproi l�
-PARIS STYLES TO DATE-'
FASHIONS II FASHION'S HOME
1�1
Paris, Yfeb. 8.-T,he latest and most
important sartorial sensation in
the fashionable world has been
the trousseau of .the little
Archduchess Elizabeth Marie of
Austria. She is a thoroughly
up-to-date girl in her love
of pretty clothes and. thanks toiler
Indulgent grandfather, and )ter
grandmother's-lna.gniflcont tegaeies,
she has been gratified in that way
fee her heart's content. I think
'there has always been: a great deal
of romantic interest taken in her,
owing to the terrible shadow
'thrown over her early days, when
she- was too young and innocent,'
happily, to be conscious of the grim
and
Often M1eunderstood Tragedy
of, her fat]1ei!'s end. Then came,
later, anotfier awful lnisfortune to
the ill-omened House of Hapsburg,
Int the "'Martyrdom of the Empress,"
more meek retiring to wail in pri-
vate, or sob ou'c their heart -breaks
on the arms of some comfortable
old nurse. Parents nowadays do
not dream of disobeying or protest -
in;, though they may, 'tis true, keep
the key of the family coffers, and
crake things hot, legally, for the ob-
stinate young person. Elopemeuts
and
Clandestine Weddings
aro pretty well dentodes, for the in-
dependent spirit of the age prefers
to ince the music and take the con-
sequences. le thie a sign of ad-
vancement or decadence, 1 wonder ?
'Well, it has little to do with fashion,
anyhow, and as my land lies in the
world of dress, 1 will not wander
farther afield.
s r e t1
Ono of the prettiest ideas which has
cropped up lately, a181 evidently in-
tends to flourish vigorously, is the
ribbon coetume. I have seen some
very fascinating examples, which
you may like to .copy, for evening
dresses now, and later on for fetes
and garden parties, for they will be
1640311111
•t• 11110
'44211 Ilk
Toilette de Promenade.
Now, pecple rejoice that the young-
er generation appeare to have more
luck, for the young Arehduelhesa has
made a real old-fashioned love
anatclt in wedding her nine(' Otto,
and otle cannot help adealring her
pluck or determination 'oi prefer-
ring to give up all her rigida to the
Imperial Orman rather than her
Sinneve. In thi:a, too, she has shown
herself as trite girl of the period ;
lenoj burled nal• the days whet the
young people never dreamt tot
'stem:110g up to their parents or
guardians, q1' holding their awn
against the glare d0••ree forbidding
ttnsuitattle ttilinuree, there le n0
pin To rev, to yt10 , WI', 111'.
1 e,...,„, t•h2„e'e outsmenr a.;.tmattil1
nal a
sol •o euro ter run
n) b u
.1
'� f Wham,
velli a it
0011 every fa, 1'r.
bleedingned)r0' u,lint(pile¢,
,the tnt3ltnfactu1Arehave f.ularnnte dit. aes1ev.
bVainest; in the daily press and trek 10urnettle
ore w trot they think grit, Yellen u: o it arta
Wee t' stoney back If not 801'411, tee: n,1.1'04, a.,
an dealcre or 1,nbteneot'T,I)A'rl's & CO.,Torento,
Oro Chaos.% Ointment
Jura, the thing for i he et:meter. crown-
ed by nn airy, fairy hat, and, one of
lite parar::•1:t for Mete 1 strove, last
time, to ensure;(ou: plteenage. cine,
worn by n woman of n more "ger
lone" age -there are net many left 1
--LL 1)14 e0mr0srd u' 1,1:11.1 [1[11[8-Hat'zl
t ilib:)n, about throe medics wide, htty-
int1 )
Groups (,i-1'arots Os-chi:1S
11.'„11 11, 11111 alternating with Cham
tine 1.)01' 0f tip. rh.tl11e 8 i 1111 f0r11i .1
tho o-kirt, sit ih1' it ,t ten: or the train,
)veiled Was eon,» ail round the fret,
the ribb'nra haul; in 1O1) :•I1 tl"taelel1
11.01121', 0'c•(')' tleek ir0lh,, pleating -It of
1(1301 egine-d0 8 .t', the R1101e 11101111t -
i 1 Ort back tiff'tnn 4111' now, Loft,
r.:htiny m•Ik'. The vort•att':':; of tbeee
rI!dh,n peewee art. 17:11 1115 in 1.01110
(deme ostle•', as int', riaee,rl`l arming..
tllt•1110rlve8 prett115 int.) Colt-
or voluted bo bie:':. with nn 'inn( r
elientilaette of lit' to' is 1' ; 1h • or ,,
I have ,jllkt 111: ('ri;r:' 1 it t 1 •111 b'. n. l'
nrrnn,,1 meet n1' It 11• t10•'C tat a e1'•
r;aligel tlohtt•LLi�^, ua ll')' n sleep 1)'111 k
panuc belt, f.tstent'al with Important
Cul eor1 01. musical-ains1 tinkle,
tinkle, and are as pleasant change
from Inevitable rotes du .'ol (tttd
-(x101wei8H, On 0 pearl grey tulle -
swathed theme of alluring shape,
with white paradise feathers nod-
ding over the brim, a'ospre.y aft pearl
cherries, with silvered foliage ,and
etalks, looked dainty and uncommon,
worn witlt, a. frock of grey crepe de
chine, bedecked witit oltl Valenciennes,
the yoke and mitten F1t:eves being
of the latter, which appeared also
three times, "lucrnstiugly," on the
fully pleated skirt. In the way of
tiny
Toilette Accessories,
ideas for welch, I think, always
"come in useful," I have remarked
[••0081'»1 novelties and innovations.
The eoiffure is sicuply. Inundated with
combs, so - to speak. Combs, oomb8,
everywhere, catching up the loops
and curls, dividing the hair wlhero
no partings would otherwise be, and
puffing out the still beloved "bouf-
fant" round the temples and sides.
Little pearl headed combs are much
worn, and very Email ones divide
oven 'the fringe in a piquant fashion.
These fringe combs show prettily
under the aureole -brimmed hat, and
Stops the Cough
and Works OfW the Cold. ,
Laxative Jerome -Quinine Tablets tura
a, cold in one day. No Cure, No Pay.
Price 25 cent%
with tho Marquise and Tricorn°
chapeau, they are again seen, catch-
ing up the pretty knot of curie which
are now 'arranged just about the
middle of the head and rest on the
nape, or a little higher up some-
times, a la grecque. 'the tweet
flower wreaths are three little
[sigh i1,ihey Bunches,
With a loaf or two connecting them,
standing ttlh' like a tiara, or diadem,
over the forehead. The leaves just
taper off at the sides, and disap-
pear under the low coiffure, • This
style was favored by a bride ateone
of our recent ultra hinligrt weddings,
the three little bouquets being of
myrtle, from !which the lzeieloom
veil, of priceless Brussels lace, fell
gracefully from the back, over the
train. Little diadems of violets look
very pretty in bland hair or white
marguerites with golden hearts; the
flowers should be small and dainty,
to grasp the proper effect. It is a
change from the Napoleonic foliage
wreath, which has been a prime
favorite this season and is still to
be seen on tate stately head of Mrs.
Langtry, as Mlle. Mars. Her .Greekly-
arranged coil of hair is crowned with
green and gold, bay leaves having
diamonde round their edges. Her per-
sonification of the famous actress,
who so cleverly influenced unci scored
off the wily First Consul, is very
goon. The dresses and stage furniture
are beyond all praise for their ab-
solute perfection in every detail; of
the richest possible materials, all
have been imported from France,
having been faithfully copied from
those of Napoiron's day in the .Lou-
vre. They give one a charming ver-
sion of real Empire and Directoire
dresses and furniture, and Home of
the frocks would make fascinating
models.
a1' • r x a e1'
It has been piteously cold of late
on our side of the Herring -pond, and
if cablegrams tell the truth you are
also at tho freezing stage. Skating
goes on wildly and deliriously; the
HOPE FOR CONSUMPTIVES
How the Ravages of the
Scourge May be Stayed
Statistles Peeve That more Mates
Occur Jfrom Coosuulptteu 'khan Ali
Other Contagious 1 leeases Conte
blood -•-flow Best to Combat
the titscasc,
The ravages of Consumption
tllr0t1g1301iL' Canada i an tl i h„ t 1
palling. -In the Province) of Ontario,
where stc1tisticri of deaths from all
diseases are carefully l.ept, it is.
shown that 2,211(1 Of the (1eat118 00 -
warring (turing the year 1'1)01. were
Win to Consumption, or about '10
per celrb. more than the number of
(10the oecarring from all other con -
tat ions diseases combined. Tht'se fig-
tires are startling and show the ur-
gent necveslty for taking every
available [(leans for comblttting a
(ltsette0 that yearly claims 80 many
vietime. 11io time to cure c'altsut ip-
tem le not after the lungs art' 1101e-
testily involved and the 1108101'8 huvo
given up lope. 'Taken in its early
stages. ceonsttrnptun is curable. Con-
r;unllation is a wasting disease of the
lungs and at tete earliest synip-•
tont of lung trouble steps should
be taken to arrest the wlt+ate
unit thus stole the disease, C'on-1
sutuption press upon Iveaknes,t.
Strength 18 the hest meas:ire of
safety. Dr, Williams' Pink fills are
the best , tonic and strength builder
known to medical 801e1108. The evened
of Hies medicine epen.l114 for itself and
proves conclusively thaat talent waren
the symptoms of consumption de-
velop they build up, strengthen and
Invigorate the patient to a point
where dise13e disappears. In proof
of tires take the case of Ildege Mt.
George, of St. :reroute, Que., who
says: -
'About a year ago I became
greatly ran down. I lost color, suf-
fered constants)' from he1(laches land
pains In the side8; my appetite left
me, tante I became very weak. Then
was attacked by a couglh, and was
told that 1 was 01 consitniption. Tile
doctor ordered me to the. Laurentian
'Mountains in the elope that the
change or air would benefit me. I
remained there for some time, but
dict not improve,- and returned home
feeling that I had not mach longer
to live. 1 then decided to use Dr.
Williams' Pink Pills.. After using sev-
eral bottle» my appetite began to
return, and this seemed to mark the
change which brought about my re-
covery, for with the improved ap-
petite came gradual but surely in-
creasing strength. I continued the
use of the pills, and daily felt the
weakness that had threatened to and
my life disappear, until finally 7 was
again enjoying good health, and now-,
8h, those wito know me can see, I
8110w 110 trace of tete illness I passed
through. I believe Dr. Williams'
Pink Pills saved ma life, and I'hope
my statement will induce similar suf-
ferers to try thein."
These pills aro also a curtain• euro
for tete after affects of la grippe and
pneumonia, which frequently devel-
ops into eottsuniptian. Through their
blood -renewing, strengthening quali-
ties they also cure anaemia, heart
troubles, neuralgia, rheumatism,
stomach troublee, kidney »1131 liver
ailments and the fundtionawl weak•
neeses that slake the lives of. so
many women source( b1' eonetacit
misery. 'There aro many imitations
of this meeleine nail the heti ith-seek-
cr 5110:11.1 protect bine elf bI seeing
that the f1111 name, "Dr. Williams'
Ptak Pills for . Pale People," 18 on
every box. Sold by all dealers 'in
medicine or sent pont paid at 80
carts a boo or six boxes for $2.50
by addressing the Dr. 'Williams'
efedielae Co., Brockville, Oat. 1
Austrians still skim along with their
glittering jewel -bedecked skates, it, is
a conspicuous freak which will not,
I fancy, catch on. The ultra -chic Pat-
Ineuses favor
White for 'their Costumes.
1 have seen one in an underclrees
of white broadcloth topped by a
captivating little scat like an Aus-
trine I11l8lar's, which seemed to hang
loosely from the shoulders, and was
caught across by big cream b.'andee-
bourse, and netted buttons; the
big black fur collar and toque Made
a telling note on the snowy -white-
ness, and was becoming to the wear-
er, whose hair was of the "chatain
rouge" order. A great many skaters
prefer grey to whit° fur this year,
A TRYING SEASON.
Little Ones aro Subject to Colds and
the Result is I)alrgerotts Unless
Prompt Remedial Steps are
Y'akeu.
TO CURE, A COLD IN ONE DAY.
Take Laxative Brame Quinine Tab-
lets. All druggists refund the honey
If it fails to cure. E, W. Grove's sig-
nature is on each box. 25c.
and many add tL touch of pink, In
Lha shape of a bunch of La Franco
1 roses, to the prt'tty toque, muff and
pelerine which are "ensuite," and
{ smarten up a little costume of black
elbehjne or panne marvellously, a
touch of old lace being frequently
added discreetly to the three "objects
d'art." -
The little once aro apt to take
coil no matter how carefully amother may try to prevent it. While
colds may affect children In different
ways, the maul symptoms usually
aro that the Child grows cross, the
skin hot, the appetite fickle an,1 the
child quite feverish. Unless some-
thing is done at once 'lo relieve a
simple cold, tile result is often very
88-10115-ao 'Serious that Many 41
child's lite haw been lost. There is
710 remedy that can cgu:tl Baby's
Own Tablets in eases ot this kind.
These tablets promptly break up
wads and carry off the poisonous
matter that hue been retaine:i in the
system. By doing that they reduce
the fever ; the pulse becomes normal;
the appetite iH restor-1, and the
child ie again )veil mei happy.
yfrs. 0. C. i:trle,• Brockville, Ont.,
stays : "I always use, Bnby'e Own
Tablets for both my children, aged
three and sive years, when they nre
at all unwell. When my line girl
)w<is a
Tow months ole, tele had It. Ind
attack of whooping (10uail, and • I
found the tablets very beneflein
Since that 'Licit) 1 alwaye keep tleui
use. s. Ahti 1
+
in the beam 1(readyfo4 S
the Waive! are -trenteltel with hlll-
001nessl, any tlera11a'111 n1'. of the
Et munch, ore p•';•vi:ail or fretful, or
wiled they have a cold, f n1v1158 11348
the tablet», 0111 8111 4LI14114 0 111e1t1Od
with the reelate.'
These tabiete 411'8 a eeri:tln cure
far remit tronelat ale coli.', sour eto-
m:Leh, 10111!„e 11"1[1 (ii:irrhoga, e0n-
etip;ltit711, simple torr ati 1 e01da.
They prevent erten) 'an l 17.11.17 the
irritation necomolti.' l l'; the elating
of teeth. '1'11-5 are 8011 01111er tin 411)-
I'1,iute 1'318 ra113t(to 1 (33)1.1111 11.) Op-
i:Lir' 1'i' 0110'1' 13.)lental lir;: y. Mee. be
11:111 8'1.in armed tv 0r rill be ott+nt
pr;<tpeld at eel C.‘,11 11 11 110x, by ud-
iire,• 9911;; th1' I?:', \i'[ileatuls' 1iedlcitlo
Co,, 0roelcville, Ont,
ease the contradictory tenet) ns
ittl trinint ng en frlant, an Aleatlan
bow of scarlet .chiffon catching* bele
the 81de, which was raised off the
11 air. 1 am told that th!,re is 0
(14F.111Ue of
I'0Wder e(1 Muir
fuliow'ing In t•1.`) wotie of time Louie
XY. st510 (i etcuilt;ys (111.,,.1; it 81121.1.
be appropriate, anal a d i .1t of white
ter g('ld) pewiler i* cel thinly bee
montage late to 3110- It tetater5 too much.
of t,Jir•.1tI'l -%tis x111.1 faIlity bails, 21111
1(115 way "1;.:ving l.-1 ir.'i&e, .loge ' 111:11
it 11(5 (Olt 001(1.' eche) (1)1 1'04011 tor -
!zee ah). yet
'1'n:' newolil hail.:kersil:uf 181)48, sites
lk 1(111101, 01'0 1u' 1 GOA narrow, 1.01 s0
long or narrow 118 fats; lntt;s, 11,14 more
in 'that 3t$i1'. 'They are e,;ii>k•oh'ier-
(a11 teal eat/OWL as f :,et trite
quaint Hist• :1101;8, wheal you may,
whit to. little ' poetise. about," 1111'2
u1) in ill ` Rue do Lain, or outer Curio
kii.alitle1+,• Some of the enemata 100
111 (101.3(1110 5.1[•81' or 01-10011, (011!1
1111.1•: 'sake'»; heath, to "aster[ theta,
The (401) little 80rilellt is having
great popularit;v no an °Went of
j '4velre 8.1180. Sarah Bernhardt; 11315
l,;li t nim t111' 01)11rp111nelli, of intrl)d'1c-
Ile; 111111 to "Thoehlora" ; ltl all 1'114 1)11 -
duetting. 8111'paineae 110 ie eee11 tuber
Indole-1ujked-0f
Laing and Bangle,
Ito is eoverctl with 1.ttlo rete and blue
enamelled 351)0114, Itis eyes are red
Me/teem rnounetoucs; )0u may find
bit (:oublc in talo ltu(1 Jet vale, but I
warn you you well p ty tlt'nrly for
copy ilhg the '`divine" Sarah, wito
I tam tol(1 leelieros 1n the luck -beteg,.
in -g• prol,enkl1Ltes of her little snakes.
People are deootating, themselves
with antique rniniatures of their
cestors, 01- other people's, wince.
wear on the 83111 of a
Libber. A girt I allow
inepirntleo of taking
graindn'others 11118101
I At the very fi.'tl;t nate of spring
Parisians fly to summery brats, and
already some alluring shapes have
appeared In black calla and lace
staws. These straws are crowd-
ing by the million metres into the
millinery !rouses, for as you know
the best modistes make up all their
' own fascinating 51181>es, just as they
want thele, evolving new and lovely
ideas with fairy facility. We are
told that Many spring hats will
Wee) curtiains, made in the Same
straw or in another material. Of
co0ree, for some time, French wo-
men hive had a leaning towards
things dropping from their hats,
ribbon and velvet .oracle, lane scarfs,
etc., have tiozi1etintes reached the
, shoulder, and look 'grateful on a
Prettily Set'French [lend.
They must be, arranged with to ate
anti diecnetion4 however, for it is
a fashion evliicl1 may molly enough
lie caricatured or vulgarized, Tete
eurtatins I liavo seen aro really,
pretty ; they are 110((1, benott,tll, lbkt)
the helms, with drawn tulle or elate
fon, The Crowns are low and
11:111* flower 11-000110& round theta,
re0(1111 over the curtain or a
swa•tlulug of mull[) with narrow gold
ribbon -or ribbon velvet ••-• twisted
rowel it at intervals'. Jewelled but»
torte are placed Wherever it is pos-
• 51141n on 11)te, aa3.1 melte a sparkling
• centre to the tulle or panne elemx.
1 under the u: turned brines. The new-
: est straw willbe the ohr s(intllornuzn
s Y
straw; which 0Cnles 11L a variety
of lovely torte[», and will slake most
miry bc:eolltitlg hate. tlatti : it motet
be of Italian growth, for it 11)18 tL
soft, a:Lthiy look, and is eorpesetl
' of delicate epates ant petals. It
hart the liglltttues ut tulle, with more
L tiurabilit,w, I caw. 11 hat of scarlet
{ tht'y.sa11111(1(mm straw, wiliell Would
' bo perfect fur a brunette; it had
a euttple of 'hack Angel's[ wings (es-'
an -
they
long watered
had theoleeor
11er l,r.='Lt-
rre front its
faded littic red frame and having a
tiny mirror set into the back. At
the end of a beacly, watered ribbon
she finals her aUe utors both useful
;111'1 oreemental 1+Citi1 a white gown.,
is 411(1 pearl -rimmed nthnlatucehang-
ing on a rlblx>n of Komi( -y -blue, looks
very p'Ctt,re*gee sal 000011101011
Ilht, I Ibink, that for this week, my
talo 1H told, so ---'to our next merry
stetting I Chante -Clair.
+++0 0$'+44.0++04 804+ ti++a' ++0
•
4 g
SOME INAPPROPRIATE
HYMN SELECTIONS.•
++000+++0000 (++++++++++++++
Anthems are a pitfall to the un-
wary. At r1 London suburban
(Meech, not long ago, the pulpit was
occupied by a stranger, who thought
the first part of the service was
dragging. "In orderto enliven the
proceedings," he remarked, "we will
sing two anthems, one before and
one after the sermon." The object
was doubtless attained; for' he chose
for the first anthem, "Ye shall go
out with joy," and for the fiecond,
"Now it ie high time to wake out
of sleep," ,
Sometimes an unexpected accident
will make the most careful precau-
tions useless. On one occasion an
unlucky preacher had just read the
notices and given out the number
of the next hymn, when Ile saw a
cheetah officer approaching the pul-
pit. So ile paused for a moment
with open book. A:1 a result of the
deacon's message, the minister an-
nounced that he had forgotten the
ladies' meeting, of which be pro-
ceeded to give particulars. Ile then
gave out the number of the hymn
once more, and began to road the
first lino, which, to hie great dis-
may, ran, "Lord, what a thoughtless
wretch was I."
An even more remarkable accident
01100 upset the gravity of the Eng-
lish Wesleyan Methodist conference.
The list of ministerial stations for
the ensuing year hall just been read,
but, being in some points unsatisfac-
tory, was referred to a committee
for further consideration. While
awaiting the result 'of its delibera-
tions, the president thought the
conference might as well be occupied
by a devotional service. He, there-
fore, gave out the first hymn that
caLugiht hie eye in the book. As soon
as the ministers attempted to sing
it, and realized its possible applica-
tion, they were so convulsed with
laughter as to be unable to pro-
ceed, The first few lines were:
Father, I know that all my lite '
Is portioned out for me,
And the changes that are sure to
conte
7 do not fear to see.
Ill his brisk periodical. "Truth,"
Henry Laboucttere once called atten-
tion to the inappropriate choices of-
ten made tor funerals and marriages.
For in1tanee, he regarded "Now the
Laborer's Task is O'er" as a meet
ill-fitting requiem for opine sybarite
peer who 11'ul never done a .stroke of
useful work In his life. Again, Ito
pointed out that there must be au,
utter back of 1)11180 ud Iluuhori ilif the
choir wh`cir weuel celcl:rte the wed -
cling of a titled youth,, 11.1111 n. predis-
1>oa111lon to bankruptcy, and an el-
derly heiress by singing "0 perfect
love, alt 113170011 thoughts[ tranecend-
int,.' Iltave myself known nn equally
strange nlnri'thge selection. I11 view
of the fact that ono of the parttee to
the contract had had several pre-
view engagements, it wee rather un-,
kine to taelec't 88 one of the hymns
that wIt:cli contains the lines:
"What though my heart is yearning.
For the love of long ago."
It WAS even more musing 1.0; hear
at a meet -big of talc'- Y ounm Woulen'al
Christian Association the well-known
hymn wheat, in spite of the line "hien
'heed thee, love 11150, praise thee not,"
leads up to tato promise, ":10011, shalt
thou hear the bridegrooms voice." -
IL I\'. Hetwill, in "Chrlattazr World."
l,ritn grohvh (1 1 'before Ito knows it ;
Woman grows ell before she lots at:15
one else knew it.
• lXl!x)y;" ?+ �'r�€ife�tec��cfi�i�►!�'+'.
HUMORS G COURTS..
(Y1
�9 � _ WITNESSES.
k �
�
If [)lire is triflina with ties truth,
, arid the lawyer know it, he eatnot
Ibrow-beat .2L W(tr11tr1 a') 111' would: as
Sill" " erwee +x alarmed, 1101)'-
,t, vryl•, are 00e41910ttt111y inju(liclaell-1
e1l'3u1;]1 to do to, with. WlUlt 1 ••'5111t1
let tea %) few 5AStam es FJlrow
I "below," 14111 coeme31, who waft
iw
0V0848-e74ainllling 11 lady t111'88, 111-
to whunt lits W00 1)110111nr; WW1 11111011
1 perverrhtty, aLrse, fully resolved into
prejudicing hie opponent's ease,
"will you 1)108,90 state bow and where
you first m1"t this mat V'
"1 think," ,'said witnese, "that it
"Never• tei(111 what you 1111014," to-
Corrupted the lawyer, "We want
facto here, We (lona; etre what you
think, and we haven't time to waste
In listening to what tate think."
"Then," retorted the lady, "t3ere'e
no 1100 quosttoning me any further."
"Wily not?"
"Because roe not a lawyer, and
I can't talk 'without tlhinkinglI"
On another occasion counsel ex-
cited an odd Jady'.e anger by Iwesc-
tng leer rather rouigllly as to the
clearneste of her sight. After mach
proteae) suet» counsel for the de-
f''neo 1)'lt Lire ottelitlanst
"Was. liar. Loveless in liquor ati ythe
itrnr> he p1-0811 446 to arlarry you?
"reel, 8i)'," replied tite pursuer,
"Ite wa4 gn the washes'-1i(ntsa, and
the flair was covered wi' gape sndoele
Title remark was foliowed by roars
of iaughter, bat the poor woman for
the life of her couldn't see where she
t had put iter foot in it. at 811.
1
An old practitioner says tllt,t it 15
ti wimp, plan not to oross-e latnine e1
100m01) to- any extent. 11. she be
deaf, WI 1085 that old lady who had
'brought an action for elaattages
againet a neighbor, It were well not
to press her too far, At .any tate
this .old lady caused Borne ssneation
on being .examined. The judge Bug-
gestetl a compromise,. and illitruet-
41(1 countrei to ask what she would
take to settle the matter..
"What will you take?" asked colan-
eel.
The old lad? merely Ohook her ]lead
at haul, informing the jury in confi-
dence that elle was vera hard of
Blearing. ,
Vie .11
i. 1 s • j ! ; - ! Mrs. Langtry in "Mademoiselle Mars."
gtie,stioning, he asked, sharply :
"Can you seo me ?"
"Yee," returned the witnese.
"How well oan you see me ?"
"Well euougl4," answered the lady
tartly, "to oee that you are neither
a negro, an Indian, nor a gentle-
man 1"
A good wailh41l1 Lviho was being ex-
amined in a north country police
court ate a wltneae, was speaking
very definitely as to certain dates
8.)4110 years before. Weasel, who
was cross-examining, tried in vari-
ous ways to shako her, evidence, but
wit'ho'ut success. After pressing her
to explain flow she was able to speak
so positively to the &stets, he sail:
"Pray, Mrs. Thompson, may I ask
if you keep a diaa',v ?"
The answer, given with an indig-
nant Iook and a toss of the head?
"No, sir ; we keep n, whiskey shop"
If 8110 is 11:4nlcly, and he cross -
(31180110514 her too much; 1111(1 too tru-
culently, aim will brace herself, per-
haps', and tell him. more in a minute
dots ]te wants to know in a life-
time,
•
Years ago, nt the examination or
8. northern farmer, on nisi sister en-
tering the box to. be examined, the
following conversation ensued :
"How old are yen?" 81lced• counsel.
"0, twee.), sir, I am aft unmarried
woman, anti 1 dinner think 1C right
to answer that question,"
"0, yea, answer the gentleman;
]3410, old you. are," said( the judge.
"Ween, ween I am fifty."
"Are you not more 2"
"Woe', I ant sixty."
The htqulsitive writer still further
naked if she Mail hopes of getting
married, to watch Miss Jane replied:
"Weal, sir, 7 winnn. surely lie ; I
ilinna Riot elope yen," tend elm scorn-
fully added, "but I wouldn't marry
;rot., foes .I am tired u' your Mager
alrelldy 1" .
During the blearing of a breach of
"His Lordship wants to know what'
you will take?" said counsel again,
this time bawling aft loudly as ha
could in the old 1adyee ear.
"I thank His Lordship ,kindly," the
ancient dame answered stoutly,
"and, if 1t',N no 111 convenience to him,
I'll take a little warm ale 1"
Another instance of a witness'
unconscious humor cropped up the
other day. The plaintiff in asnrall.
debt carte was asked td account for
the details 01 the sues of twelve
shillings which she sought to recover
from her lodger.
"Hary mutest of this is rent?"
"I'm a poor, lone widow." (Laugh-
ter.)
"Haw much 1'o'r rent 2" J•
"I've been a mother to him, I
have," (Renewed laughter.).
"Artdswer the question," said the
judge. "How much for rent'?"
"Three shillings and sixpence."
"'Meat else ?"
"A bottle of beer, threepence."
"Have yeti got to. license?"
"No, sir, nor it husband either."
1S,ucli evidence was irresistible, anis
plaintiff received decree for only
eight shillings.
A wotnlan in a witness box of a
colurt of justice is often a source
of perplexity to a good lawyer, (111(1
a shrewd counsel handles "proof in
petticoats" very gingerly. When a
pretty woltn'an's name is taped hl
ec1lurt she rustles to the stand,
looks anodest and out of place, takee
the oath with tine ",Oh, I've got to"
expression and then waite expec-
tantly for the trouble to begin.
A lawyer, not over hartdsom'e hirn-
se1f, was examining a young lady
witness in court and determining
to perplex Iter, he +40141: .
"Upon say word, miss, you! are
very pretty,."
"i woatid return the compliment,
eir," said the witness, promptly, "If
I were not bound to speak the
truth 1"
Apply This Test to the Nerves
if You Have These Symptoms Your Nervus Are weak and Exhausted -You Can Cot
Weil by Using Dr. Chase's Nerve Food.
Nervous diseases arc Itttle underetood. They have long; been enshrouded in more or less mystery by
the Medical profession. Many who are fast falling victl5ns of nervous prostration, paralysis, be locomotor
ataxia, think that they aro merely not very well, and will soon be around again --so instdl0ue es the eppr0,arl1
of nervous 1ieonses ani nervou8 collapse. t • s
Study these symptoms. They are for your guidance. Troe may not leave them all, but it you 11avte ally
Of iheru your nervous system is root up to the Mark, and a little- extra expenditure or were force may brim;
the (eremite! downfall.
,intolerance of motion, 110150 end light ; twitching of the muscles ot 1110 Mee and cyelldo : fa.iiguleg:
sleep, sudden starttngs and jerkings of 'tato limbs; dizziness and flashes of light; before the eyes; Irritability
and reetl00811(ss in 0091'5 part elf tate body; eteadacho, indigestion, feelings of Weariness and depression, and
loss or Interest in the affairs of life.
Mo. Jong 110 ,1118 daily expeneattite elf nerve force le greater than the daily int2n'n.e, physical bankruptcy in
oertnin to result sooner or later. Nerve forgo must bo increased, and this can best be aaetemolished by the
utte otr Dr, Cltane'te Nerve Poeta b50autsta 1t ca1ntain0 in e0neentr'ateti ,form the very elements of nature which
gotdirt'otly 1> form11er1elts energy, Net-vO)144 d1settses do not right themselves. 'alley ('01110 on .gratinnil% Iter
nerve force 0een1114 0 e+;laeusted, and oan only be cured when the nerve force Is restewredE
No treatment for nervotle t11weaseet .hart ever received sualr nnlve1sa1 etelorsentont by bot. phatidelettle sea
1300131" .ta hlu-s 1)r. 't iiase'e Nerve 1 coat
111 the pre,ga or Cannata, you Will firth' Jlnnclr8tdi4 ol` earnest lettere telling oit ilio twonderfnl benefits derived
from ]':)r.. t'hn.3 '1'l Nerve boot!. V° a, boXt 6 btDxt+e for $1:150, at lull dealers or Zantanson, Matti & (`o,, to.
ratite. ' 3 - 1 . 1 t• -