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HomeMy WebLinkAboutThe Blyth Standard, 1903-05-07, Page 61 ADAM'S WOES. How We learn That He Was the First. Dyspeptic. Dyspepsia, that curse of human- ity, should be abolished. Too long fit has been allowed to work havoc among the people. The time Mot Dome to call a halt. All good men and true should come hlto tile aid 01 humanity and stamp out the dreadful disease. Whiskey has slate rte thousands, kerosene lts tens of thousands, autotnob hes their millions, but dyspepsia has made several uncomfortable. It 1e the most persistent, the most exasperating and the moat dis- agreeable ailment that the human trash is air to, and it is heir to Bev- eral eery painful complaints. It ;not only makay; you feel unhappy, but trots you to a frame of mind Ito make every one with whom you oome in contact miserable. It is not te pain. It is not an anile. It la simply the most consummate , 'torture ever invented. The early Ids- , tory of the disease Is wrapped In im- penetrable mystery, but It le thought It started le the garden of Ilden. Eve, not bavtng a mother to teach her how to cook, Sed Adam plus and cakes and things that were not Ilt tor h,ltr digestive apparatus. Very coon he experienced all the tortures of the damned, and from that day, to this, so It he averred by some, there has been dyspepsia In the land. Ia the rant, there is it legend, how• ever, that dyspepsia ie a direct Im- portation from alae superhtmted hereafter. They say that ono time 'tbe lid was left off lades and the chief torment, dyspepsia, escaped out 11et0 the world. Since that tine hell has not been itself, and the arch fiend luta sought in vain for a tor- ture to take its pisco. There tae then, a compensating thought that those who have aye- . pepefa in this life will find nothing worse In the other side. Atter one has clad this disease all other ca. families took as prosy as a 'gun. Act in a cheap chrome, A RECOGNIZED FACT, ft 1s universally conceded that to properly appreciate a trip to New York or Boston, one meet taketbe hsst road. That road is the New York Central. y` t Another Veteran. Chicago News. 'Base,' said the wanderer, I "went thvou h'three battles" "Shake I" exclaimed the man in the cottage. "I went through three my- self." "Yaw del?" "Yea, I was married three times." Piles'lb prove re yen Ahab Dr. Chance 0{ntmeuClsaccrtaln and absoluis euro Inc each and every form of Itching, aa,�tit bleeetngand protnldint piles, t. ttl,� ymarintaotnrerx have guaranteed it. See tee• entitle in the dally press and ask your neigh - whet they think of it, You cnn use It and 1�t r money back if not cured. (Oo a box, at Yl ealo or EDMANa0N,HATes&: Co.,Torooto, 'Dr. Ohaso's Ointment Cautious Donald A doctor waft attending a danger- One ee.ee where n Scotch Bidet' was eleataged. On !catling in the fore- noon, ho said to. Donald ; "I hope your master's temperature is much ower today than It tens last night." "I'm new sae vera sure about that," replied the butler, "for he deed this dorm n': f It is to accord with the eternal (tines of Mhinge when a million- aire works hoarder than his employ - pea; be gets more pay. A sprained ankle 1s not an uncommon Widest. Painkiller relieves and cures filmes t as It bymagic. The greatest. household rem- edy. void.ahetitutea. Teem le but nue "Palnklller"-Perry Truthful for Once. Boston Transcript, lass etnylor-Everybody says I don't look mar lige. Miss Perthlgh-0t course, you don't dear. It would bo simply Impossible, Treheroo, Jan. 6, 19Or-. lifaney-Harris Co., Limited, Wtnmlpeg, Man. Gentlemen, -It gives me very !Much pleasure to Inform you that 'the No. 4 Binders. which I purcllae- 441 from your Agent hero last sum - liner has given me the, very best of satisfaction, doing its work to jperfeetton and drawing light -very ,-mach lighter than I expected. My Drop was very heavy and some of It very badly down, but your binder did its work splendid. I had no trouble whatever. I hope you will jell lots of bindere for 1903 and ism my brother farmers lots of ¥trouble. I wish yon every success. a, M. FERRIS, Cook's Cotton Root Compound. LasFed J'avorks. Is the only safe reliable regulator on which woman can depend "In the hour and time of need." Prepared In two degrees of strength. No. 1 and No. 2. No, 1. -For ordinary cases is by far the best dolisr Medicine known. lfa 2 -Por special eases ---10 degrees ogat-terse dollars per box. Q.adfee-a your druggist for Cooks, Mattes Root Oompoond. Take no other jOall pills, mixtures and Imitations ate sag.eous. No. 1 and No. 2 aro sold and eardnded by alt druggist* In the Den- on of Cans. Stalled alled to any addr. Do- pier of rIce an four S -cent patois Mask Gees company, CANADIAN ORDER OF CHOSEN FRIENDS STABILITY Thr heat guaraniis, of.l".AMIA'fYtnrnIoh- ed by any IA:ATI;1tA.11, Nuri t:l'Y la the ability to allow - (I ) a atnwlny: RBSFRVR }'11ND. (L) a growing 31111111?!141111'. (S) up to date !sutura In every respect. The Billowing tulle exam Olden briefly and comprehensively the slnndlug of The Canadian Order of Chosen Friends from the brat hyo pain to of view - Year. t(eutbrrab)p. ]reserve. 1887 175 1888 347 1880 832 ($ 1.048 89 1890 10011 4,438 65 1891 3145 11,805 10 1892 5032 21,1311 77 1893 7803 52,713 40 1894 0710 72,501 DA 1895 11364. 100,784 00 1890 1269:! 108,877 73 1897 15027 139,284 27 1894 16152 164,290 58 1899 17833 268,047 711 1900 19918 214,254 47 1901 221(.0 084,1183 05 1902 23829 313,769 88 Up to Date' Features (1) An Insurance In rase of death of $500, $1000 ,1500 or *0_000. (2) A disability benefit of one-half fare value of c•ertt0rntr. 1Au OI,I) AGE 1(I141111'. AYUNOA!A I, BENtFIT,thle lsnptiona' A SICK BENEFIT, tide teals° optional Fpr further purl len lar address W. Y. MONTAGUE, (Grand Ileeorder,11nndltoe,0nt. W.F. CAM Pl(ELL,Orail d Orgnnlser,Hatn- llton, Out. Organisers wanted. Heaven Enough, N.1'. Weekly. Friend -Why did you refuse that bandlomo yang widower 7 ,Mies Malnchanoe-He hadn't any relations that I could send his chil- dren to. Minard'e Liniment Lumberman'/ Friend. Iter Analogy. Wtahington Tides. ''1 wise," said the girl thoughtfully, "that thep wouldn't use that ex- pression 'launched upon the sea of matrimony,.' t' "And why not 7" naked the young man anxiously. "Well, ,you knowwhat kind of a time 1 always have 011 a sea voy- age" Oil City, Feb. 5, 1807. Hassey -Harris Co., Limited, Toronto, Ont. Gentlemen, -Phrase Bend me one of your 1901 catalogues of farm machinery. I have used no ma- chinery that gives no good satis- faction ne Massey -Harris. JOAN ILtI1RIOTT, Another Tender Heart. New York Weekly, Clara -Going to for charity again, are you ? What is It this time? Dora -We are going to distribute cheap copies of .tieotltoven's sym- phonies among the poor, Miele, le 811th an aid to digestion, you know! Port afulgrave, June 5, 1897. C. C. I=ICHARDS & (0. Dear Slre,-IIINAR('.. LINIMENT 1s my remedy for colds, eto. It is the best liniment I have ever used. Wife, JOSIAH HART. For Conundrum Lovers. Buffalo Commercial. When the M-r's turn came he ask- ed tire convivial pundits to answer him this; What le ht that has two eyes and sees not, pour lege and rune not, and yet can Jump as high as the Waarhington Monument 7 Obviously "a dead oat.' Teen the man who wants to know always points out the weak link in the chain, and the proponent crushes him with the query, "Well, how high can the monument jump?" This Jou d'esprit Is likely to have a great tun In too Diplomatic Corps next winter. Perhaps the M -r will start a eorap.book against the social exigencies of the coming campaign at the naikenal capital. If so ►ds army of ftiende Lora will gladly contrib- ute thereto. Here Le a modest yet choice specimen with which we cheerfully start the rtubeer1ption "What is the difference besveee a girl riding up a 11111 and s young man giving a young lady a dog? Ono 1a taking a gallop up, and one is giving a gad a pup. You see It -Isn't half bad when you atop and think It out. Lever's Y-2 (Wise Head) Disinfectant Soap Powder dusted in the bath, softens the water and disinfects. 38 John Bull 1a O K. Toronto Globe, During the fiscal year 1902 the United Kingdom exported manufa . tared goods to the value or 1230,- 000,000, Germany to the value of L1.50,000,000, France 085,000,- 000, and the United Btates, 000,000. Fortunate In one Way. Chicago Poet. "There waa the prettiest girl at the charity bae,aar last night who was eefing kisses at a dollar each." "Weil ?" "Well, I was broke, and she wouldn't do a crrdit buslneaa. What do you think of that?" tin Iancya ly thnlucgOMe man are born PARIS' NEW FAD. Tn Em. cold L"otid Only the Latest Pian ee lteduging One's Weight. Tho new Parisian cure for tee much. flesh is to take all food, or nearly all, cold. The early break - feet of toast end eggs is eaten cold, Dud Oho food Is wnelid duwu with cold coffee or milk. At luncheon there to nothing but oold (meats and cold puddings, with. bread, 0110060 and salads. At night the tuna! conslste of only tnat'al- lease of bolt, cold entrees and entre- meta; co bot vegetables, but per - It ps as a bonne boucle, :t hot cut- let, leen, of course. litany people fa Paris who are in - dined to bo //tout, ospecutlly among the women, aro assiduously follow- ing llto now cure, and most, of (Iwo W110 1111v'0 trite! It atasert that they 113 NO obtained satisfactory results, Roosevelt Texts, Some of the humor1et1 are so de- lighted with the notion of Col. 11010e - vett no 1'reoideut of Harvard that they are hunting up testa for his "Pinning of 000aelolf," If WO may use the impression. Tito l4•aehtngtou Poet offers this little collection: "Thy servant slew both the lion and the bear." --1. Samuel. tell. 36. 'Thy children, like olive plants, round they table.' -Psalms, male- 8. "With thee will I break in pieces the horse."-Jel'emiah, 11. 21. "Hanna (1J, why weepret thou 7" -I. eamucl, I. 8. "So is my strength now for war" Joshua, xiv. 11. This Woman is Unhappy SHE SNORES her breath Is bad, because of Catarrh 00(s a mercy to tell her that DR. AGNEW'S CATARRHAL POWDER will surely Cure her, Some remedies ere quack-Agnew's core ie quick. Her life is in danger from Pulmonary disease, which co inevitably follows Chronic Catarrh. Thi; cure complete.nly costs lOcts. a bottle. Relief instantly and the patient stays cured. It not only soothes; it heals. Colds and Acute Catania relieved, and head• ache cured in ten minutes. George Lewis, of Ilellenback & Baker, Ohatuokln, I'n., writes: I have used a great many Catarrh remedies and have never had any relief until I used one box of Dr, Apert Ca. timbal Powder, which eared m0 after 1 had been troubled with Catarrh for fifty years. 1 am 80 years old. DR. AGNEW'S HEART CURE keeps the heart going, which keeps the nerves toned, which set stomach and liver and the whole system (n order; and that's the right way and the only way to do (t. 15 A Unique Bridge. Ont of the must carious bridges ever built, perbiopo nnlque in the history of the world, was that made by the British troops In 1800. They were marching on Pekin, but found their progrcne barred by a flooded river of com iderable width and depth. A timber party woe formed, but found nothing to put down or borrow eultahlo for a bridge. At last a huge store of cot-, fins teas diecoverod In the village, and with these the soldiers built tlmlr bridge and crossed alive over the receptacles re. the dead, The Etiquette of Divorces. Is It not time the' a little book on the etiquette to be observed by cll- voroed persona was published 7 "How to be Easy though Divorced" might serve as a title indicating the help- ful character of the work. A few refleotione In the Boston Journal will perhaps give the author of each a manual a few hints. "It seems to us that a divorced husband should 'treat his divorced wife when be meets her at a gonial gathering with the distinguished toonaldera- tion that he should pay any woman. He should not pregame on any form- er Intimacy, Tuna he 'should not wink at her knowingly or poke her slyly In the ribs. Nor should he In the course of general conversation say to aggressively oheerful tones: 'You remember, Elisabeth, I never oonid eat Brussels apront', It would also be in bad taste to aak: 'Who keeps you to mind of your engage - menta now?' Jim Knew. Senator Hanna told to a group of aIle fellow senators the other day Ude story : "In Lisbon. where I was born, they gay a black man and a white man were once riding togeth- er pious a lonely road. The road led past a Jell, and in the courtyard of the Jall, they saw, rising above the high and dismal stone wall, tl gallows. "lime said the white man, "where would you be if that gallows had Its due t" "Guess ah'd be rldin' alone, fah,' Jim replied. -Washington Star. What shrunk your woolens ? Why did holes wear so soon ? You used common soap. REDUCES EXPENSE Ask for the Octagon Bar. 005 Ilia !within( ion. A genteel carter 11Iwoy0 sits when ho carves, 001 ys . a work on eti- quette. Perhaps; 11e doter; but It he pretty tertian that there are times when yw youthfully yearns to pet ono foot on the table and the other on the bird 01111. 5truggiiug with tho fowl. Keep Min:tars Liniment in the House, The Brave Sex, Wasbin8(oo filar. "Do you think haat women are as rimae RN men?" "Braver," answers! Here Cnyenno. "You will obeervo that the sclentiete who keep talking with terror about the bacilli In a kegs aro all males." Maumee Liniboent is used by Phy- sicians. Jetferann'a Maxims. "Tho 'gage of Monticello' has been called an Infidel, but the charge fe a libel. Jefferson was not a devotee of any particular form of OCetestas- ticism, but he was 1! believer In God, in the higher life tend in purity. 110 practiced rho golden rule tar bet- ter than many statesmen of a Tater 11800. A fine example of the 03udlous, painstaking, methodical, pereevcrinit, simple, economical, and withal pow- erfny man of affairs, Thome,; ,le flee. tea will rrmahl for all time. "Tho follow ingtea Plies of conchae from his pen alight well be plashed in the hat of every clerk, stenogrn- phew, bookkeeper -employer and em- pl0yed-in Chicago. Cart out, frit slid and given a place: on every desk 0 tithe great heart of American mem- morel/Olsen, 111080 maxims. Studied 1I0 men hustle, would make 118 all wiser and hotter: 'Never put off till to -morrow what you can do lo -day. "Never trouble another for what yon can do yourself. "Never spend your money before you have earned it. "Neter buy what you dui not want because la Is cheap. "Pride costs metre than hunger, thirst and cold. "We seldom repent of Bevins eat- en too little. "Nothing k troublesome that we do willingly. "How much paha ovlls hare cost us that have never happened. 'Take things always by the smooth handle. 'When angry count ten before you spank : if very angry count a it n n d red." -1•:x. A Better Way of Putting it. Chicago Pest. "Would you call her mercenary?" "Well, perhaps It would he better to ray that in Coat i „ - .•„ , ,"t,ters site displays good business judgment." HOW'S THIS? We offer One hundred Dothtra' Reward for any rase 01 Catarrh that cannot be cured by Hldl'e Catarrh Cure. F. J. BEN EYACO„Toledo, O. We, the undersigned, have known 1", J. Cheney for the twat 15 years and believe him perfectly huaorable in nil bualnees trans- aetlona and financially able to carry out any obligations made by their arm. Wier & TRUAX, Wholesale Druggists, To- ledo, 0. WaLntae, K(NNAN a MARVIN, Wholesale Drugglata, Toledo, 0. Hall's Catarrh Crre is taken tnternnlly,act- fng directly upon the blood and 00 mous sun laces of the syetem, 'Ccetlmoulala sent free. Price -75c per bottle. Bold by all druggists. Hall's Pemlly 1'Ole ere the heat. ISSUE NOe 19. 1903. Mrs. Whallow'a bo0thing 8 akoald always be used for Children Teething, 10 eoothee the child, softenithegumee nares wind coUc and la the beat remedy for Diarrheas. LEARN A PROFESSION IN FIFTEEN DAYS by mail so 700 cnn MO, from FIVR re TON 001,1,A110 A DAV. Fur purlirulaee write A. HANSELr •Ma Ha,A a North Hamilton, Ont. LADY AGENTS WANTED THE ALL -WAYS READY .1t1aT 5VPPORTrI 1 001? n0JJrrra.. Best Selling Skirt Supporter and Waist Adjuster ever Introduced. Sells at sight. Good profit. Saadi 25 cents for sieges and terms to amts. MUSH' & CO., DEPT. If., TORONTO. USE 1,000 MILE AXLE GREASE It Has No Equal Manufactured only by THE CAMPBELL MFC. CO. of HAMILTON, ONTARIO, For sale by all leading dealers. SOFT Loon `EYEL"ETS NEVIRSHOW" tROUGHTHEGOWN NEITHER CORRODE NOR STAINUNDERGARMENTS AND WILL NOT RUST. horse Health is one of the most important things for every farmer to consider'. Dick's Blood Purifier will build up a rundown horse. It tones up the system, rids stomach of bots, worms and other parasites which under- mine an animal's health. so cts. a package. LEEMING MILES & CO. AGENTS. • - - MONTREAL. When a „widow appears is half - mourning It's the wise bachelor's sus to take to the tall timber. 4. 1 .heat the same a; ever SI.Jacobs011 continues to be the sure 8105IS Rheumatism Neuralgia ral'1e1. 25.. sad 50e. tASSIMMIONSIMMOIF 444 V..a It ton /sere, w"laemn, u.c., No,. u, mos. Plwe send me your •' Tfra,ira ox the Norte end hi, Ui,e"rs.' Vara used ICendelh e.p,,;n Cure (or aro Rave V n4 gladly dly, testify to its r aveC, Nea.e. Je 5PAVJJV CURE rive eau or epnia ebeolutelr 0.11& nyti,ln. N. Ilakua, Jnn. ee, poi 10., ru(1 fire liar.t ehsolarely of Sy. An in Ital.. a Inn, years with your 10. 140, Spavin cure. Very Rely yours, ll arty nawast. THE OLD RELIABLE Aad Most Successful Remedy Ever Discovered for Spsvins, Ringbolts" Splints and ell Lamenala. This L the unqualified eaperience of thousands of horsemen and others In Reseed other oountrier and there lane reason why you should not chars la these benefits. Just read what theabovepeople say about "Kendalls." Web to them for your ownsatistseuoa. In addition to being the beat stable remedy knee, 10 is unequaled as a lioimeat for house- hold and family use. Sold `enereu byettdrug- gists. Price cel' six bottles for 0. we send valuable book, '1A Trestles oathe one, , pro. fusely illustrates, free upon request DR. B. J. KENDALL CO., Esoabur/ galls, VI. irr [,r