Loading...
HomeMy WebLinkAboutThe Blyth Standard, 1903-01-29, Page 6N1•••••ONN'ONNNN•• The ReekiNews Gently. ng L...................... " Then, sir, you refuse to permit no to pay my addresses to your daughter ?" " Moet emphntically." " Good. This Clears the atmosphere. Perhaps you approclate the fact that you haven't any monopoly of daugh- ters There aro others. Several of there." ilea here, what do you mean, you vagabond, by Coming to me with such Impertinent talk? Make yourself scarce before I set the porter on "Softly, my old friend. This rage 1s both unassuming and dangerous. You bavo a Jecldod aapopletic look. You must be careful. It to folly to permit trifles to ruffle you. Look at nue. Do I seem at all agitated 't Not a bit of It. You have been rude to me. You may be ruder. But you can't upset my equanimity. No, sir " If you don't get out. I'll throw this Inkstand at you." "Don't. There Is something about you that convinmw mo that you couldn't throw straight. You would muss up the carpet and °palter the walls and smear the furniture. And for months these dark stains would rise up to reproach your ball temper and our lack of skill. Never throw ink if a club to handy." "See here, any young friend-" "Thank you, sir." , " What wilt you take to efface amuse!' 7" How unkind of ,you to suggest ouch a thing. There are men who can't be bought. Ian ono of theta. I decline to efface myself." " Woll, what do you want?" "Da you still refuse to permit me to pay my uddreeses to your daugh- ter ?" ' Yes." "But you don't stent to understand that your refusal is crorthlosu." Why worthless 7" " Because she and I stole nway and were qui51it ularrie,) yesterday." " Eh 1 married 7 That does make n difference. Draw U!1 a chair."-eleye- land Plain Dealer. His Own Free Will. Dear Sirs, -I cannot speak too strongly of the exreileneo of MIN- ARD'S LINIMENT. It Is THE remedy in my household for burns, sprains, etc„ and we would not be withoQut it. It 1e truly a wonderful medIFlne. JOHN A. MA(7H)NALD, Publisher Arnprior Chronicle. Betbre and Alter Marriage. Philadelnllla Record. '• When a feilou- le In love with it girl," Rays a cynical bachelor, " he Rays, ' I could listen to you forever.' .After ho marries her he lino to." Monkey 'Brand Soap removes all stains, rust, dirt or tarnish- but wou't wash (lathes, se It blokes a Difference. With every evidence, of fear the railway official cling to his sant. Tho train was making about a mile a minute and the roa,l was rough. "Corduotor," ho sail at last, "It is ncoeltaa.ry to run as fust ae this 7" "It's according to your orderer, sir," answered the conductor. 1 "My orders 7" "Yes air. It's a Nighty rough stretch of road, but tho stations aro new and fur between, and you have trequent'.y given us orders 10 make ppledtim, hero." , I have 7" "Yes, air." . t , "Well," returned the official thoughtfelaa "on the occasions when 1 lawn g'rea you thot•e orders 1 was scatted 1n it comfortable chair in my office, c0mur.uucating with you by prire, n-hile now Ian on the train." "Yee, air:" "And IC nr•.kes a difference, condue- tor-a grout difference. To -day I'n not so pa1't.cula.r about getting that; train In on tiara I man ,t good deal more intere,:ted in making sure that our destination to net the pearly gates."-Calc:ago Post. For a Cold that hangs on For obstinate coughs and colds there is nothing equal to that old reliable remedy Gray's Syrup of ked Spruce Gum. Prepared from Red Spruce Gum it is soothing and healing, to the Lungs and Throat. It stops that tick- ling in the throat, and after a few doses that tight feeling in the chest is relieved and the cold and cough pass away, Try a 25 cent bottle. Gray's Syrup of Red Spruce Gum ASSESSMENT SYSTEM "The heart never finds that the bitle are protested When drawn on the firm M wife, Children or friends.,, Every man should entry nufhelentlnsurance to protect Ole loved unee, and to tosure to them the income they eujoyed during bis life time. Are your loved unee fully protected in the event of you being relied brace? This 1s n. pertinent attention, and One that every man should apply to hlncedL 1f they am not Cully protected then the CANADIAN ORDER OF CHOSEN FRIENDS will provide just what you require. Look up your ante, etude the siguree wen here, and you will find at what a small cost you can carry another 4500, 41,000, $t ,500 or 42,000. 1 luou ranee or protection. TABID: 0l' MONTHLY BATES. At the On On On On Ages of 4100 41)0(0 41500 42000 18 veare 40 29 40 58 40 97 41 10 19 and 20 ,11 Ito 0 60 (00 1 20 21 " 22 0 11 U 62 a Wt 1 24 28 ' 24 0112 061 1) 110 128 25 " at ,0 311 Il (10 0 99 1 82 27 " 28,.• 11 34 O 61 1. 02 1 30 29 " 1000:11 0 70 1 01 1 40 al ' 32 , 0 116 0 72 1 ON 1 44 35 34 ,• 0 37 0 74 1 11 1 48 85 " 110 0 38 0 70 1 14 1 52 8 7 ' 38 0 40 0 80 1 20 1 60 81) " 40 11 411 1) 86 1 2a 1 72 4 1 " 42 0 47 0 94 1 41 1 8S 4 8 " 44 0 12 1 04 1 56 2 08 4 5 " 411 0 62 1 24 1 Mil 2 48 4 7 48 ,,, 11 77 1. 51. 2 31Oy 4 9 " 50 1 00 2 00 11 00 4 O Should you also desire a"persona( benefit' during oickueee, ODD by paying the (ullo)r• Ing mu)tthle contribution. you will receive , benefit. of 411 per week, nod In the event of death, a funeral tomcat of 410. At Ages of 18 yenre 40 40 10 and 20 0 41 21 22 042 23 " 24 0 43 25 20 0 4- 27 " 0 28 8 O4 ill :12 0 41 0 48 8a :3 0 48 85 880 0549 0 117 'I8 0 050 39 " 90 0 511 41 " 42 Il 54 41 " 44 0 51 45 " 40 u 00 47 " 48 6 40 5U ' U 75 For more Information ripply to the nearest Council or write to W. P. 1MON't'AGUE. Grand Recorder, Hamilton W. F. CAMPBELL, Grand Organiser, lin snit ion ORGANIZERS WONTED Their Fortunate (stupe. They (tad Walked half -01,1tItrough the park at a smart pace, :and sae now hank on a shaded Kutch : he seated huunelf 308lll1 her, Tacy were entirely alone, ,ea.0e Por an old 1111111 at one eel of their ;rat, lm- merw:d hi a look. The it ,agitated conversation contiuucd, "Oh, it Is too dreadful i" she shul- derrd, coverino her face with he" beets, as it to shut out Kuno un- beatable davit, "Fearful!" be agreed, deeply moved nod ,mopping t protea, perspiretlon froth loos brow, "H'orrible3'' she added. ''I can- not bear to think of it. The 101( or hope, happiness, perhaps even Of.. Itself--" "1{usb 3' hn Ioterrnpted, gently-. 'Let us strive to think of it no more, or it may grow, to prey upon our minds." "Pardon rue," sold ti, old ratan 01: tho end of the, bench, his waory eye4 dhdeuded 10 I11e1y .uppreiten- Rfon; "11118 there been toms: awful thanker 7 Have you leen foree;t to look 018031 emit') awful tragedy;'' The young ooupl) regarded each other lu soma conftsfou. Iiesitating• ly, the youth answered: "No, air. You flee, wo have just become engaged. 811d we were talk - Ing of what ncal:amity It would ((00 been lied we never met." -December Smart Set. Does " III" Mean Sick. There are otgnn of an exietingpro- pece:ity to constrain the partial withdrawal of the word "sick' from the American 4:nguago In favor of the word ''111 " Newsplpero In their head -linen and eloew11ere speak l,OWUd aya of "a very 111 man•" It weal to be "a very 13031 maul,' Why the change? "An 111 wind" ,s a ;;a.t- htfactory use of language, but "tan. 111 man" t_raam; 00 the car,;old eounde like an attempt to Improve on to 11 050 that land no perceptible defect. They 00,e thin ,1100 wulna is a cuphcm'.em Imported from Eng- land. A coi'eapoudaut of a Hoa. ton Flew. dt-el((i,s and disapproval it, prolthtbl„ not only against the use of the, nuwarre ntahie adverb "lily, het egainet ''the growing use of the word 'III' in pl:Ice of the home, ly word 'elek."' Thic 19 010,, pro. ted; Int, (10011(2 Webster, Untie that Hetkespeare with Itoa'dly an estop 11911 11sen "ill" to n)r:1n mentnl•,or- ci. 0^ l:nper.sOual ((0:ordcrs. "111 at ease," "111-0112 "iii -bred, '•til-brehd, "ell- feros," ore nil fit and familiar )see of 1' good and lud111011loun 111tlew.)rd that bins plenty of legitimate work of ito own to do, tritheat being 0on- ntratn1i to fl'{ere tie a •teelee eubstl- tut" for "rich." -H lrjxlr'a Weekly, Don't Swear. rxenange• It elide my blood to hear the Blest Supremo Rudely .;µpealed to on each trifling theme ; MAnte in your rank -vulgarity de- spite, To sn'e 1r le neither brave, polite, nor wase: You wool/ not swear upon a bed of death, Reflect, your Biker now may stop your breath. Proof Positive. Chicago Nowt,. Hix -I noticed your wife afttingfn tho window sewing this morning. I thought you told mo yesterday she was 111. Dlx-So she was; but to -day she's on the mend. Irving and the Newsboy. New York Tlmon. Sir Henry Irving Is telling In London with mueh guide of 1111 In- cident that he eatye occurred during ids last visit here. "I was attuning down Broadway one afternoon with my long locks floating over the volley of my top coat. when 11 newsboy rushed np to ate, and, gestleolathig vloleutl;t, Kilolitre! at me in a tragle voice : "Deck, hack, Sir Henry ! Fly for your life!" "1 contest) I W3(a a bit flustered, anti as 1 ,looked nervously round, 1 askel: 'What's the matter, my lad 1' " " "Orclhle danger, Sir! There's it barber in that hotel opposite!" Minard's Liniment Cures Distem- per. IIIc Secret Beller. Cleveland Plein Dealer "Do you Menne1in the equality of the seem, 3" Tea, 1 do. Bak 10001(111'1 like tar wife to know 1[." -Cleveland, Nide Dealer, -- -- Minn rd's Lluhuent Carrs laph- therin, CrLulnal's Lucky Pierce, "Nearly every criminal," said a de- tective, "curie's some snot of htoky piece 1n 1114 pookel, nail will venture on 110 Undertaking of moment 1f he lute lett this piece at 1301ne. Holmes, the murderer, carried 11 111119, which he hid Mond on u country lane 10 his boyhood. Mme. Humbert, the French swindler, has a lucky stone Dam Mount Vesuvius, one of the French Uetectivel told me, and there is melt, 1n ell her dresses n SpeeitII i:rk rt rte. some time. Bredell, tho counterfeltlr, used to carry au Feryp- Han seance. 1 know a pickpocket who cartes a tome of tt cat that het 11101, 1(11)1 that he nfterWItrde killed, and its it fact that this plck- pocket hasn't come to grief elate he 0001s 1p the tooth. One of the thirst proficient card eliari s lu 1'ltiladel- 1Milt carries tt lock of hale from the arae of Ills divorced wile -not from sentiment or regard, tor he, will ex- plain, If yon task 11 in, but 100132' the leek of heir Menge hint heck, I don't 101100'1, as 30 matter of fact, (11111 I ever met a crook who didn't War 10010 Nott of pocketpleee to rely on." -Philadelphia Record. enwnslum "shine lilt il Ileo J, L. 8(1aa x wrltea "I have used Dr. last two a ettarthal Powder for the tut two mouths and am cow completely cured of Catarrh of five years' standing. It is certainly mag- ical In Its effect, '350 nett applica- tion benefited me within five min. uteri." NO IS THE TIME To tax Dr. Agnew's Catarrhal Powder, Itis an antiseptic, heal- ing dressing, applied directly to the diseased surface by the patient himself, who blows the powder through a tube into his nostrils. The cure dates from the first puff. Yon needn't snuffle from colds or hay fever if you have the catarrhal powder to the house. Cures a headache in ten minutes. Dr. Agnew's Pills costing 10 cents for forty doses, two-fifths the price of other first- class pills, first cleanse and then cure the bowels and liver for- ever. 1 lue111111,.. :.Illlll191w Hotted to Make a Safe. Now York Tinos. Mrs. Newrlch•-I don't need any powder 1 my tenth are all gold filled. Sol' sun n-Pli '1 p'rhnp0 ,you would Tike to purcII005l a MA: le of our metal polish 7 For ten months I suffered with Rheumatism ; I could 111003 neither hands nor feel, and felt excruciating pains in my whole body. A German friend recommended St, Jacobs Oil; the result astoulshed me, all pain vani8brxl, and I was cured. -J. B, Hy- land, Troy, Now, York, In 15813. Friend -Shakespeare, your wife 10 awfully headstrong, isn't she 7 William -Yee, Ann Hathaway. HOW'S THiS ? We offer One hundred Dollars' llewnrd for nay cane of Catarrh that cannot be cured by Hall's Catarrh Cure. 1, J. CHENEY & CO., Toledo, O. We, the undersigned, have known F. J Cheney for the last 15 years and believe him perfectly honorable in all buelneen Crane. fictions and financially nble to carry out any obllgatlone tuade by their firm, W far a Torsi, Wholesale Druggists, To. Ie 10. O WAL I MN%, K)NNAN a MARTIN, Wholesale Drugglota, Toledo, 0 Hall's Catarrh Cure Ie taken Internally,aeb lug directly upon the blond and mucous sur- face of the system. Testimonial' sent free. Price --75c per bottle. Sold by all dr'uggleta. Hall's Family Pill, ere the brit it manages to get [Ito very early nowadays, Every Woman Should Know. That Prof, W. I{odgson ICllle, Official Analyst to the Dominion Gov- ernment, has recently made a'aumber of analyses of mpg, and reports that "Sunlight Soap contains that high " pelyeutage of olio or fats necessary "to a good laundry soap," What every woman does not know is that In common soaps she fre- quently pays for adulterations at the price of oils and fats, 'Fry Sun- light Soap -Octagon Bar -next wash day, and you will see that Prof, Ellis is right. He should know. 200 The 1111N111UNN land, seam Aimee le. Enuua was n talkative little girl. Sic, woe very fond of :Irking (1ues- (1ong, although meet of her (uee- 1l0ar wore funny ones. Olio day her father took her for a Walk nlong the road, and, erelnt; n made peeking 111,1., sbr said to iter f1t- thnr: "Father, look al that funny borer." Her father told her that Ile was not a lior,et, int a Mule, Then sum naked what a nude was. ne Mild t0 her: "A mole 1e lullO h -)roc amt half a donkey." "Which Galt is the donkey 7" sic ask(xl. law the Lillie OneN. An .t D C hook, beautifully Mee - Mated, is one of the latest advertis- ing productions of Siassey-llarrls Co., Ltd., the makers of the famous Mae - ell -Harris farm 1 Itplemeuto. 1iy mentioning Ws paper and send- ing your nelne and address en a post- card to the Company 11) Promo you can obtain a ropy, Hereditary. Barnes-Thero goes 1111fler in his automobile. How Ilu:ckly be hug lrarl;ed to run the thing. SIdril-Seo, 1 suppose It Is n faculty tihat 11, inherited. We father used to be quit., et expert at the wlteelbar- row,-Hoetnn Tyenserint, New York and Hostels 'V la New York Central. The nnm09110 trains, the excellent Nervier, the uniformity of lie trains, Ire four tracks and rho location of 111, depots in 'Melon and New York, make the New 1ur11 Centrttt the fav- orlte line to those pointe. Are ticket agent will confirm the above. Dimple Makers. The Parte-el-Your wile, sir, 11 try - Ng to rail my church. Witherby-Ii that le really the case, the only thing for you to do is to kiln any poker elute-learper's Bazar, 13101,3'-Wip' was the engagement broken off betwer11 lladeppc and Miss lljonns 7 Slobj»—I brliete they came to the (emcee don that her loco", weren't largo enough to support them both. Plle-Didn't our honeymoon pass e311141l;, '313 resl7 Ile -Weil, I sheeted say it Mil. 1Fhy it teemed no time before I hall :Telt all the money 1 had. Blanche -Mabel says that her en- gagement to Tom is a secret. Tellth-Yes, Even Tout lees not Sus- pe('t it. "I hope you do not descend to mali- cious gossip.' said the woman with serious Ideate. "No," arum erel `,floe Cayenne. "330 ono that i know gossips mellciously. They do tt merely for fun." "They had one of the strangest marllagre re .or led for a long timer' "In whet re.;tect7" "In every respect. Why, both pa- rents on both sides were present. There Was nothing sudden or secret about it, end their own clergyman performed the ceremony," -Judge. Sim -Me mind, I'd have you under- stand, is on something higher than my Brews. Ile -Oh, is It 7 On your hat. I snpposot-Pillladelphla Even - Ing Bulletin. "I always do as I pllyts0 when papa and mamma aro drensed up," ea Sd little Willie. "Why f" queried nether Elmer. ''Canso they can't punish me then for fear of tmissin' their clothes." Mlnard's Liniment Curers target in Cows. In it Sad Predicament. A vaudeville artist out west re- cently adopted fou' plckaninnleg, ranging in ago front 4 to 6 yenta, In order that elle Might neo them in a comedy sketch. Now alto has loot her voice and her employment, and will bo obliged to tinkle for t livelihood in some other Ilelil In order to Nup- fort the little negrocs until they shall bo 21. 3Hnard's Liniment Corea Colds, oto. Candid. Chicago Journal. A number of ladles began to d1s- en1e the virtues of their respective husbands, when every other topic was threadbare. "My husband," said one, "never drinks and never swears -Indeed, he bas n0 bad habits., "Does Ire ever smoker' some one asked. "I've, he likes a cigar Just after he Imo eaten a good meal. But I don't suppose on an average he amoke4 more then once a week," Some of ler (fiends laughed, but she didn't seem to undor,taud. ISSUE NO. 5, 1903. Mra Winslow's boolmng Syrup should always be used for Cldldren Teething. If soothes the childaftcnothott',uul+, cures wind colic and b the (0,1malady for Matrixes. -- TEN COURSES BY MAIL ''''"'""g thnrongld,v fought, 1•:z`rthretnu•Iera. Indi- vidual DUDE (ion, Send for handsome cut* logo° for oft tlenh0•,. Correspandcnco Ospen- ment CENTRAL BUSINESS COLLEGE, tomato Can. WANTED, AGENTS 1't °ter)) ie w" nod tillage 8' Canada to sell rands to n""u,ur° hAl11FN' Nulls, Jacket. end skirls; gaud cu u0uiasians. Crown'1,1110ring CO., CW11ad161 Largest 'Cull - ors, Toronto. WANTED, AGENTS ever, town Canada to sell MEN'S orderedlc oval dugs In ood emnmisolous; radon label. Crowe Tallorlug eahl)nde'A Invest'@tllors, Toronto. WANTED -FARM HAND, MARRIED nauh ( without. hn•tnnbranee preferred) mind be expe morieneed hi general fanning and rare of stock, and be well recommended; abut a single man. Address I'ost Office drawer 27, Hamilton, Ont. NyANTI:D—M EN TO LEARN BARBEIE (rd°; steady practice furnished b3 free work; Inst venous and 1°0(1)0)0 by ex- perte; wages end shop experience Saturdla ys: tools presented, board aoppllod ; eatuloggue mulled free. Muter Barber College, Chi- cago, 18. IN YOUR TIME FULLY OCCUPIED 0HIS WIN'rl'lli7 It out, we ore open for an honest and energetic Juan to represent ns, and emr eta rt you Ina profitable business. WL' e1 te,Portr,l t. Nu pply Co., Parkdn (,,,Toronto BUTTER, NEW LAIj EGGS AND POULTRY WANTED (lon'lgnments of nutter, Poultry and neo had lagps No11.11.• 1. Pelona Gem toreholee, uol- itles, Choice yooug('hlekerto,dry ppleked,clea)a, Netting 60 0, Sec per pair. 0111 ley 1100 per Ib. for BEESWAX, delivered Toronto. ('orreupondeuee suncit.d. .701111 .1. 1155. 61 Treat St. taut, Termite VICTORIA PROTECTOR The only Itygoalc Nap. hit Supporter made. No chaflna, no soiled linen, no trouble; npleusure to wear it. Indorsed b,1, thuusnnde of Who and physicians. 10(15 BYE" WANTED. sample 111111 terms 41.00: r.00 Orr d,0011 Catalogue 1 1 ,L her agent's gosh: 131:5. C. W. CANI''JJIILD & CO., Box 301, Dept, 11, London, Ont. ST. JACOBS OIL POSITIVELY CURES Rheumatism Neuralgia Backache Headache Feetache An Bodily Aches AND CONQUERS PMN. When an animal 11 all run down, bas a rough coat and a tight hide, anyone knows that his blood is out of order. To keep an animal econo- mically he must be in good health. DICK'S BLOOD PURIFIER ha necessity where the best results from feeding would be obtained. It tones up the system, ride the stomach of bete, worms and other parasites that suck the life blood away. Nothing like Dick's powder for a run down horse. 50 cents a package. Looming, MUcs & Co., Agents, Z1ONTRBAL What, Jones Didn't Mean to Stay "So y00 were m^riled on the Bret," wild ,Tonne to ]frown. "Well, It eer- tnlnly was a pleasant New Year's for you. 1 (wish you nutny happy returns of the doy." Piles To prove to you that Da t'hane's Ointment Is aortal. and nbeolute curd for eaolh and evory form of Itching, bleod(ngand protruding piles, the meant octane, have gears ,,tend k. Bee tea I lmonials In the daffy press and a k your neigh - bora what they think or it. Yon can two 1t and get your money bark If not cured. fins a box, al all dealers or EnatssoN,BA1vs lc Co.,Torouty Dr. Chase's Ointment Or Anything Else. " Your son will be a oomfort to y0a1 In your old age," remarked .the vlsltor. " If that bey terns out as he pro- misee,' Bald the father, '1 won't bars any old age." -Detroit Free Press.