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HomeMy WebLinkAboutThe Blyth Standard, 1902-09-11, Page 6- + .+NN•N♦N•0.sN0.•• rH WITH THE EDITOR E • JOKED ••••••••••••••••••••••••••• SS An oilier rail melee elake a. }eke tot well ns luoixtly. hut there are times during; the rush of business when he is :yet ti meas the point of the Joke for some moments. Such an Maumee lappenetl recent - U' 1n en Auslraltan u] -country nen s• piper office, which resulted seriously for oho Joker. The joker in question happened. to be the eviltor's own bro- ther, w -hate he hzufu't eon for ten ymr8. Ho came to surprise his bro- ther CACI topay hint a short Ihilt tld, belnll more or lass given to the vice of pritotical joking, he determined to wwlt upon his brother in the guise 'd "Rho feller what vtanls to lick the Illdltos'1' l 1 I tie wa.e a big, strapping man, will fltt 41 to enact smelt a part, and when he forced hie way Leto the editor's pMvnto office, he haul the hat pu111e1 down over his ayes attd a h(g cigar Hoisted at an uugie of 4e degreee, sauslng him to look very fierce. "Js tills the &leer ?" he asked, as he Awed hies brother. 'I't he" ropiest tit, other. "What Darr I oto for you ?" "Nothing," retorted the fiertc-look- Ing man, "It's me that wants to do for you. Are on prepared to take 0. good heklng'' "Charmed, I'm cure:" replied the editor, and Willi tlita hp phkrvt ups portrait bleak and ,lammed it into the mates lace, knocking hint under the table. The foreman in the com- posing room htul a roller in 111s hand at the time, and hearing n strange noise In the offloe, enure running In )tart in time to sit on the strange mane• ,heat and ran the roller over Me face. When the man came to his senses fie explained his little joke, disclos- ing Wa Identity, and all lb now peace and joy, barring a piece or Mamie tbht le missing, where the stereo - glanced off hbt head. It took some little time to get the Ink off his face, and his (beet le still a little lame where the.fore- man'A No. 11's tracked It up, but Otherwfae he Is doing first-rate. The Earl of Dudley. The Earl or Dudley, tits new lord lieutenant of Ireland, Is the young- est man who ever represented the British Government at Dublin castle. He has just passed his thirty-fifth year. He traces his lineage back to William Ward, a wealthy gold- amtth of London and kneeler to the queen of King Charles L His full One is W!lllora Humble Ward, but he b not at all humble. MR father watt lmmeneely rich, owning 40,000 Mr01 of land and many mines and etollleriee, I(1s runt roll was return- ed at $810,000 a year. The, very highest eduea1t1o1) Was given 11tr young earl, who lute proved lime"lf one of the stanchest nobles In the !United Kingdom. Messrs. C. C. Rieharda & Co: Gentlemen,—in June, '98, I had my hand and wrist bitten and badly mangled by a vicious horse. I suffered greatly for several days and the tooth cuts refused to heal, until your agent gave me a bottle of MINARD'S LINIMENT, which 1 began using, and the effect was magical. In five hours the pain had (eased, and In two weeks tbe, Wounds had completely healed and soy hand and arm were as well as ever. Your' truly, A. F. ROY. Carriage maker, St. Antoine, P.Q. Retraction. German village folk are evidently very easily offended. ,rhe following advertisement recently- appeared In the "Wernigerode IntelligenzBlatt'': "[ herewith retract the libel uttered be me against Frau Meyer to the effect that eke was wearing the same bonnet thee year 1'N she was last year. 1 offer her my apologies. (Signed) Fonu Henning." N KELPION pp a n"suo 1001x. 0.11411111?.) Indorsed by best English msdlosijsurnsts. Supplied to British toddlers In South *tries. fer all Throat end Gland Troubles, Lumps, Aka , Old Sena Wens, Widens, Skin RI Eoxsms Pimples, Stiff Joints, Rhosmatism, Lumbago, Sprains, amino% Riles, Cuts, Son Put Pleurisf Sold es Druggists. gee. Tr, It ones. Mvrellnnt—I 1%a141 vont to take111Is forte to 01y w/fe. Clerk—Lf e!u,s turf at home shall }-- Mernllnnt-Oh, you'll Mei her nil [tome. There's a now (amity moving their househak1 goods in next door to-day.—Pltiladelplhia Feeds. NOVEL TEST OF DEATH. Device of a French l'hydelan deems to Leave All Doubt liehind. Horror of bring berbai nllve la comwun to the whole nonan race, and from thee' immemorial rxperl- tutees hate brim itt prottreis with the vim% ut oinking such it terrible fate impossible. Some plysielans umintl)LI that satIefactory tette can also be 1111)14 by thieves of the Roent- gen ray s, but It is not everyone who hos the factlitte, for making sech tests, whereas unvisne ran make a teat oil the pine devised by Dr. lea rd, •t ply sheen of Marseilles. France, The doctor (see fluorescin the well- ktlowll,olorieg material, and his ex- periments have prove;l 00 successful that they, have won for him the ap- prove' of the French .taademy ort defenses. Fluoresrim injected Into the human hotly produces abettlutely oto effect if the holy is dead. whereas it prabtces must surprising effect if the body is mitre. Dr. leer(' used a solution of Il which is ext strong that a single grluntne 18 able to eel - or 40,0111) quart, of water. If a little of dale Narhitio:. is in- jected under the skin of a living per- son, ht two minutes the skin and teperhtlly 1114' internis membranes, u'Itt become emelt discolored, and the enreou will present the appearance of one suffering from an acute at- tack o1 j:utndtee. Moreover, the eyes wIll become it greenish color and the pupils will almost become invisible. limey se ntptouts will remain for one or possibly two louts and then will gradually disappear. wince fluoreteht produces this effect on n living body ft naturally follows, according to Dr. }card, that any body on which It produces no effect roust be dead. Little aches dryer grow to be big one" If they ore promptly treated 0)1111 I'erry Dials' Painkiller. A gaud thing to remember In the *1'114011 of dtarrhren, cholera neorbtu Mad other bowel runpininta that come with aw 1101 Hada of the Bich. 'William Gould Brokaw. a New York exegete' men, ie spending $25,000 to put a btnall Juliano/10 garden in his estate near Great Neck. tender n french gardener he Is employing 70 skillet teen on the plot, which So to bo only 200 feet sgw,rc. 11 will PO7I- itsln all of tho rare trees, shrubs and floweret native to Japo, and the Landscape destge will be after the Japvnar' models. Phare will be little but expensive sinner -houses, tea pn- golins nee tlelt,y's, The walks and lanes will be winding, but till in an ex:.et system. Tile plans have not all boon mead, 1x11110, but Mr. Brokaw ex- pecte to hove the Japanese flower gerlden completed In the earls fall. A BOON TO HORSEMEN—One bottle of EngllshSpnrfn Liniment completely removed a (urn from my burse. I take pleasure to recommending the remedy, no It arta with Mysterious prnnlptneaa In the removal from horses of hard, soft or calloused lumps, blood spnrin, splints, curbs, ,weeny, stifles and sondes. GI:ORGli Rt1BB, Farmer, Markham, Ont. Sold by ell druggists, Would Probably Kick. IExehnngc.t A correspondent write., as foliews in the New York Sun : "In ten years there will be no oth- er religion except Christian Science. • • • 'Nle lion and the lamb shall lie down together, Tile Is rather herd for people outeltle of the thought to believe, but It Is never- theless a fact. Everything is mind; We have no bodies. There is no such thing as dlsnase, sickness or death." It may be eo; and yet we will ven- ture to say that it the correspond- ent went home hungry and found no sign of dinner he world raise tie much fees with his wife or the cook as If be really had a body that need- ed nourishment. An Imp000lble thing to and fa a piaster equaled to "The 1). & 1.." Menthol, which 1* being Imitated. (let the genuine. For stile ache,, hark -aches, stltrhrs, nothing equal* 14. Milne by Diode & Lawrence Co, Ltd. Poser for the .fudge. Pat, hoving been unduly familiar wit), a corkloss bottle, found him. tett enjoying a night's lodging at the expense of the city. "Ilow long have you been In tale country ?' asked the judge the next morning. 'Putti, an' it's neigh on to seven 1110lltlt*, ,•er honor,' replied Pat. "Hate you a trade?' asked the 1a1g� '(lure en' ilea n sailor 01 am,' an- ewered the D'nshman. "Be calrr[ul Whitt you say," cau- tioned the Judge. eI doubt very' much if you have ever been to lea 11' pear hies "P,egoty!" exclaimed the son of Erin, "an' is it ill n wagon ypr honors' nfthrr thinkhl 0i cum` over from tho cold ('ointtu:v !" Prostrate with Rheumatic Fever Six Times within Twenty Years. Testa waldman/le of Mr.l;1lwnt- ahtre,of Laved nwne,Tee.,ealne, who, during thin time, as would naturally lie exported, *offered the cont Intense agony. lie writec— "I heartily endow the taatlle.- r11aL which you publleh of Si, Ineobs Oil 0a a pa In k ll lereer l leave been a eufitier from rheumuti*u, and kindred corn plat 1't* at diff rnm t tlmss during the last twenty years 1 have been laid prostrate with rheumatic trier six times dl rine Shat pertod,theroto re 1 coaaldrr I know oomethlug About lbeumatlem. During all of three twenty 'saes I have tried Warless advertised 'bee matte rsmedln, Cie, ointment', tad aObrotatlon*. Nona of them gave me %Seb Naa7 relleLbut DpattaintM.Jacoba OS I bowl quite def. (r rent re„dos. 1t ean,d the lain i1w,41 immediately, and has for ins• whAt all oilier tdnlrt]ldapnt together Dever began to do, ” 11rel r pry gnrtelul to you al t hr• proprietor, of t WA invaluable remedy and wish you every §Merrell In your Immune efforts to Depen mankind by minimising pain. "I could give you several rases that h+n,r berm cured, whkh have rime undenuy otIoe, 1100 through 01' recenuneudrIOune: ileo One of toothsctc, one of fneraehe, and one of sore throat. "1 hare recommen- ded St. Jacobs Oil for some time pant, and shad continue to do so by every mean" 10 04:43(0)04,1111(08. ,I,1ero,, deserving of 00017 support." Bodily wham sad pains all sureemb to tit. Jacobs 011, 141.1 w ILTrfx)R' 1: Consumption PRINCE TUAN iN EXILE. Boxer Lender Lording It Over tbe Natives. tampon Mat1.1 The only kind of constant). Prince Tulin ane gradually faded If from (1"4 horizon 01 publb: observe - Hole Wo lute It now, 00 the author - (1y of an imperial decree, that he was consumption." People are learning that con. sumption is a curable disease. It is neglected consumption that is so often incurable. At the faintest suspicion of consumption get a bottle of Scott's Emulsion and begin regular doses. 'f he use of Scott's Emulsion at once, has, in thousands of cases, turned the balance in favor of health. Neglected consumption does not exist where Scott's Emul- sion is, Prompt use of Scott's Emul- sion checks the disease while it can be checked. Sand for Tree sample. SCOTT & L'D1rNE, Chemists, Tomato, °Marin tor. and ;too; all druggists. Confusing. The Denver Post, In describing a fashionable theatre audience, says: "The house was filled with well- dres,ed wotnen and well tubbed men." Gracloue! Didn't the woman look well tubbed, tint ? Perhaps the men were not well 'Heeled and yet he didn't want to hart their feelings. This may correspond to saying: "Ho was gtlod to his mother, anyway' Steams ought to warn thle origin - 01 young correspondent—we are sure he is young—that he is indulging In the moat dangerous kind of Induc- tive reflsonhtg. Some of those very well dressed women aught take his wottl for it nod got Into ail sorts of trouble. Tide l*, indeed, the dawn, however, of oomettdag really new in descriptive composition. ^ Mittarces Liniment Lumberman's Friend. Stimulated the Contribution'. It was to Maystttle negro preacher Who, needing the money, said: 'Brethren, we will now gtaht de box au' for de glory oh heaven, which either ob you Ntole Mr. Jones' turkey will please not pit anethIng In hit." And every man le the congregation contributed. Ask for Retards, and take he other. No Way Out. "I ooulen't got out of marrying her" Henpeck explained. "When elle proposal she said: "Will you marry me? Have you any objection?' You tree, no matter whether I said 'yes' or 'no' 44410 had me." "Why didn't you Juet keep silent, then?" Inquired hie friend. "That's what I did, and she eatd, 'Rllence gives commute and that ended me." Mlttard's Liniment is used by Phy- sielaes. Contrary to 1115 Experience. "This isn't mach of a snake,"com- pialned the man who had paid 10 cents to see the aide show. "The serpent yon exhibit on the canvas outside to as big as a barrel and a dozen times ns long as this one," "What dal you ttzpmt to get for a dime?" retorted the showman. "Big makes cost a heap." "That isn't my experience," rejoin- ed the other, "The cheaper the whiskey the bigger 1110 snake." TU CUltlt A COLD iN ONE DAY Take Laxative I1rum0 Quinine Tablets. All druggists refund the money 11 0 intim to cure. E. W. Grove's signature la on each box. Sue. ellen end Nott. A London nep'spaper professes to have found the following In an Am- erican newspaper : "A duel was fought In Texas re- cently by Alexander Mott and John 8. Nott, Nett was shot, and 'Shote was not. In this case, it Is better to ho Slott 1111, n Note "There was u rumor that Nott was not shot, and Sleet avows that he. shot Nott, which proves either that the shot shot at Nott was not shot, or Ibat Lott was shot notwnthetandtng. leircumstanlial evi- einc0 is not always go,xl. "It may be made to appear on trial that the shot Shutt shot shot Nott, or, as accidents with, firearms are frequent, It may he possible that the shot Strutt Khat shot Stitt, whin the whole affair would re- eolve itself ince its original PIP - N. tied &holt vented bo shot and Nott would be not. "We think, however, that the shot Sbott shot shot not Shalt, but Nott; anyway, It is hard to tell who Willi shot and who was not." a Boxer leader,lndeed the Boxer lead- er. It le Irpoeeible, therefore, that 110 should ever return to motive of- ficial life or even to lawfully toler- ated exletiere. We find the follow- ing reference to Ilion m the North Chintz Bally News: "Prince TVA 11, Mill hie second lieu- tenant, Duke Lan—Tuna's chief Iteu- tenunl, Prime Chuang, having com- mitted sill Ido by Bilging himself at 1"('S lou, Shansi, bier year—are, ac- cording to a Lembon, capital of Esteem', de4lputch, nit present saki Lobe remolding at Tdllua (Urumislt, the cape. tel of Meese Turkestan, wheel city fa about one mold's ordinary jour- ney on horsebnok, west of ('hlnouk- uan, a gateway cut in the most west- ern portion of the Great Wall. It is reported that tire two exiles continue to "lord it over the mtt(vtas" in that part of the Emperor's dominions, and by their braggadocio 'nod revenger end loud talking of what they intend to do court against the "Western Barbarians," manage to impre',» tiled' importance upon the simple- minded K0*hgerlano ,end Tanganis— Chlueece Mohammedans—of Ilrumtsl, Turfnn end Hanl!, the tetter two tithes tieing often O'sited by the two In their 501'1.111 for followers( and partisans. Owing to the [tear con- nection of the two ex -Boxers to the imperil" oecupnnt of the throne even the Governor of Chinese Turkestan dare not slight 111001." New York Central end Hudson River Buil road. The above name is a household word and the superior excellence of the road should bo sufficient to at tract most people, but now that the rate Is the same to New York and points east as by other flues no further recommendation nboted be sought. Everybody will tell you it lo the blest. HOW'S THIS ? We offer One Hundred Dollars' Reward for any rine 1'1 Catarrh that cannot be cured by Hall's Caturrh ('are, F. J. l'HENEY F CO.,'rolet ,, O. We, the undersigned, hu re known F..1. Cheney fur the [Mel years find believe him perfectly honorable In all business trnns- netions and financially nide to carry out any obligations made by their firm. \Ci:aT • fates x, '4'holeeitle Druggists, To- ledo, 0, {YALUINIf, KINNAN a MaavtN, Wholesale Urugglnts, Toledo, 0, Hall's Catarrh cure to taken Internally,nct- Ing directly upon the blood and 0)411)1140 011r- tnce of the system. 'Testimonial. sent free, Price -75e ler bottle. Mold by all druggists. Hull's Fitfully P111* are the best, A Birch Rod Whipping. At Northampton Petty SOeslons, Willlum Itrown, eleven, FA;hoolboy, 12 Oxford street, Far Cotton, was charged with stealing, about 6.20 p.m. on Monday, the 21.1 of July, from a tramcar In Gold elreot, Northatnpton, seven dozen Northamp- ton Daily Reporters, value 1s ed., the property of Samuel Smith Cam- pion. A Ind named Dunkley do - posed to seeing the defendn.nt take the paper» from the tram wills the conductor was collecting fn res on top of the oar, . Peoovn admitted taking the papers. Defendant was order- ed to receive five strokos with the birch rod.—Newspaper Owner and Meelern Printer. Stops the Cough and Works UR the Cold. LaxetiveBromo Quinine Tablets enrencold In one day. No cure, No pay. Price 91 rents. How He Sneed Money. Mr, 1)e Broker—The hills my wife sends me from the rummer resorts are ruinous. Mr. 1)e Sharp My wife didn't re- main away two weeks. "Ell:? How did you manage It?" "Hired a fellow to •lypewrlte my letters to her, and scented the paper with violet."—New, York Weekly, Lever's Y'2 (W ice Hesd)Disinfeotent Soap Powder is better than other soap powders, *sit alto rets at a disinfectant. Items Not Given. %Punter and Publisher.) An error somewhat similar to one of those mentioned Inst month has bene brought to our aches by the editor of the Dominion Cliv, Minn„ Weekly Echo. In a local nue- itar'i report of Inst year tin (tern appenrive "H. Baldwin, repairinp bride, $2.00." Plies ▪ To prove to you that Tor, Ch,meb Ointment 14 seertala and ab,ohtte euro for each and every form of Mum blee,itngend pro. elideR piles, the matmteetarer* hove guaranteed it. Settee. Imonials in the daily pec v and ask your neigh- bors west they think of P Yen r1' 0 It and get 1� JJour moneyy bark if n", cured. Fme n box, at 1 ell await re 0r &DMAN8ON,BATER 8t Co„Toronte, Dr:Chase's Ointment Keep ISSUE NO. 370 1901, HOW CAUSTIC BURNS. Tate a piece of woollen cloth, or 8 p10110 of a blanket, and boll 1t thor- oughly in a strong solution of caustic sods, and you will find tbe wool will gradually be eaten away, leaving nothing but the skeleton. Women do not realize how "temp subutltutei,” which oro generally surcbarged wltb soda. or Mw common alkaline soap§ destroy their clothing; consequently they, week by v.eek, subject costly fabric to such treatment. Tho handl also aro immersed for hours in such solutions, resulting in eczema, coarse iklu, and brittle nails, The taught soda may loosen the dirt, but It salts away the fabric and ruins tho hands. There le ao economy in such work. It la so easy for a woman to test the difference between an alkali charged Soap and a neutral washing soap, that it is strange that there Is room for any but a pure soap on the Canadian market. Sunlight Soap ham beta tested by chemist, and analysts the world over, and Its freedom from fres alkali or caustic has been demonstrated by the highest medical authorities. Consequently the true saying, "Sun- light Soap reduces expenses.' 602. ()Digitated %VIth 1t. "People don't tall- afloat the wed• they no much as they used to." 'Such Weather aS W0.10 heed Intel, Isn't fit to talk about." Keep ltinnrd's Liniment in the House. ALBERT COLLEGE 802 stodeets aiming last year -171 ye»0g ladles and 130 you mop. Two matte ng tion Scholarships eat ( tie jltoandIMO won at de artmantal ax. DetuvIU•e, Oar, anis, 11101. New P1pe-organ, Da, mantle Science Booms end Art Gallery reroute 1J added. Superior facilities la Bookkeeping, Shorthand, 1elegrnpphby, Elocution and 1'ky. aleal Oulturr. cotters butbdlop, "Mu!7 Hail." gymnasium and resident. heated by stank and lighted throughout by elaetrlcltr. mill open Sept. 0, 1000. Fee Illustrated circular addren PRINCIPAL DYER, D. D. BUIL LADIES' OOLLEGE 28th YUtAR, OPENS SEPT. 2nd, 1002 A thorough 8000.8.!!. dent staff, 'penal rani. Write foreeweniendarto REV. A. S, DEMILL, President, St. Catban ices,0ot. Mention this Paper. Mrs. Winslow . Soothing Syrup nbould always he used for Children Teething.. 1t soothes the ehlld, softens the Q lime, cures wind code and iv the belt remedy for Disrrhosa. NO HUMBUG ** o us`i,e1.i flnn,nne *w,ne t',ttak 5.,).,.nOe,l e OWw,,,,. mue.1de ot.il are, from ,w,ur n.ee.aaia.rent e.r,m.rke,,l) fi.,lwilt oar.. 444. spree%Rooms. im an Ads tree. 1`,4.181 SO or tend it 16,41.1 lh. a erk.,.end Malars. ra•d Us, ■q•4, 'e1 eat Il yo ie,0.4.Dse.17, 'Skiers PAangn aataarOS,r0AsM.Leaa8 $,a Weekly hien and women to Bona Fide Salary' 1nR agentsre erns" su.s appolut Som,• to travel, ethers for !oral work. Rapid promo- tion and Increase of salary. Ideal employ- ment, now brilliant hnee. Best plans, old established honer. I.INSCOTT PUBLISHING CO., Toronto. 111PERIAL MAPLE SYRUP. The quality standard from Oman to Oceuo. Your money bock Itnoteaudactory ROSE & LAFLAMIC, Assn te, Montreal. APPLES DBO. YIPOND & 00[111outreai We solicit your consignments to Montreal. Write or wire us, Prompt sales. rrRUIT FARM FOR BALI. ONE OF THD Snot in the Nimes, Nahum* al Inona, 10 miles from Hamilton on two rail. waya,180lore' in all 83 of whish 4 In butt. mostly peaches. Wili be sold In one parcel er divided into Ioteof le to 8D sores to suit pm•• chuare. This is a decided b►rgafo Ad drier downturn Carpenter. P. 0. box 401, Wlnosa Ontario CONTINENTAL LiFE INSURANCE COMPANY MN. JOHN IDRYDEN PRESIDENT The report for 1001 showed remarkable increases orrr 1!1(1(1, In the following items. New business increased Irv.... $ :110,70a Premium laconic Inrren.ell by 00,312 Total 11111000 tnereused by...... 42,575 Aeeeis Incrensrd by 48,069 Insurance In force increased by 1,099,466 continental Lite Policies fire unexcelled for simplicity 0011 liberality. Ageuta wanted. GEO. 11. WOODS, CHAS. H. Fl7LLER, General Manager Secretary. OPSIV� Tiit GREAT EYE REMEDY. Do yoar eyes itch, water, tiro, or are your ryes over-weekrd were, rel, ntivty, or Your do your ryes burn, twitch, or are they granulated? ' OPENE. No reareely for tit• eve an good. Keay tone* Eye ply. Not Injnrloue. Gunranteat aerrpresentei.ATI OMNI. eptndrnoe receives prompt attention. Mailed anywhere On on receipt of 60' per bottle. TIIB OPENS CO., Woodstock, Ont. E. B. EDDY'S INDURATED FIBRE TUBS, PAILS, WASHBASINS, &c., Are for tole by alt firet- clam dreier'', COVE THEM A TRIAL.