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HomeMy WebLinkAboutThe Huron News-Record, 1889-07-31, Page 3LONGFELLOW'S i ALDEN. Who lli-- " SrimdIug. with reluctant feet. Where the brook and river meet. Womanhood and childhood fleet I" L a type of thousands of yyoungB title who are emerging from the ohrrsaW stage of neer their their existence, u they en upon h "teens." Nervous, excitable. Irritable. stirred by strange. unknowable forces within them, each a mystery unto her. self, our girls need the tenderest care the moat loving, patient oversight, and the aid of Dr. T'ierce's Favorite Prescription, to safely carry them through this critical pe- riod, during which, in too many lives, alae are sown the seeds of distressing Corms of dleeases peculiar to their sex. But this boon to womankind will prevent all such diseases, or cure them 1f they have already seized a victim. Woman owes it to herself. to her family, and to her social Nation. to be well and strong. Let her not neglect the euro means of cure. Favorit scription" is a legitimate medicine. care• fully compounded by an experienced and skillful pbyelclan, and adapted to woman's delicate organization. It is purely vegeta- ble in its oompoeition and perfectly harm- less in its effects in sny condition of the b ttl i torolld druggists; uggists; S1.00,or six Copyrlght,lese, by Woatn's Drs. Mata, AWN. Or. Pierce's Pellets regulate and cleanse the liver. stomach and bowels. They are purely vegetable and perfectly harmless. One a Dose. Sold by druggists, '25 cents a vial. The Huron News -Record Si .60 a Yoar-11.26 1n Advance. Ra' Tile man does poi do justice to his business ho spends less in 'adeereisingg than he du'o in tea. —A T. STEWART, the "natio. a: a m..•ehent of New York. Wednesday, July 31st, 1889 JAKE AND THE HAMILTON GIRLS. •Cu. R2?rams, 11' NOT, wiry NOT 1 A uew euggeetionfortheaettlowent of the Jesuit Estates matter comes from the Belleville intelligencer. After showing the trickery of the Globe atld the party for which it speaks, in making use of this ques- tion solely ass a partisan device, and resolutely opposing any practical steps for settling the question, the Intetliyencer aaye : "There is, how. " ever, We venture tb suggest, an- other course still open, and that iu " toaak the Legislature of Quebec,by "petition, to repeal the objectionable " measure. There is no difficulty in " the way of this course—no legal " or constitutional obstacles to over- " come—no vexatious technicalities " to get rid of. The power which " made these laws is equally power- " ful to repeal them. The Govern, "ment and the Legislature of " Quebec are Grit ; perhaps they " may lietell to the loud voices of " their political friends in Ontario." Mr. Wige, albeit a married man, is the most gallant of gentlemen to ladies, especially if they are young and good looking. Native tact and long experience on the road enables him to suit his conversation to his company, and Jake can talk as in', terestingly to a clergymen as to a horse Couper, end can givea maiden wrinkles on the latest 'fashion as easily as he call give a matron poin• ters on the preparation of catnip tea, mustard poultices and wart cures. This is the secret of his pop. ularity as stage•driver. The fishing at the locks has been unusually good lately, in consequence of which Jake. lase been in great demand among lovers of the gentle art of both sexes. ',The other day he took down half a dozen young ladies, all Sunday school teachere frotn Hamilton, to the locks. We will let Jake des• tribe the trip himself : "I first went to Mr.'Roper's and t:ot a prescrip- tion ailed into an eight ounce bottle for a friend in Indiana. As I had no coat on,' I. elipped the vial into my pants pocket, and forgot all about it. Then I got out uiy rig, and helped niy passengers in with their sketch books, fishing rods and other traps. As soon as they were aboard, 1 smoked that they were real nice pious young ladies, just the very best fine•cut,•and I trimmed my soils accordingly. I threw out feelers, until I learned that they were Methodists; then, having firm ground below me and a straight course ahead, I stepped out in my Sunday•go to-moeting style and at a 2.40 clip. I overhauled Mostly and Sankey, Sam Jones and Crossley and Hunter in great shape, and was getting in some fine work on the Jesuit hill, when there was a sharp report like a pistol shot, a nip nt the pit of my stomach and then a gush of what I thought was warm blond down my leg. I stopped my horse with a jerk and (I blush to say it) I ripped out en old snorter beginning with a g..eat big D. I really thought, I had •been ehot in the groin, until I put my hand in my pocket, and pulled out the vial empty. It had been filled with some yeasty stuff, which the heat of my body and the warmth of my convey, sation had worked up so that it blew out the cork with the results stated. The young ladies snickered outright at my ludicrous misadvens ture, hut I could see,.during the rest of the drive, that they had lost faith in me as a religious exhorter." HE FOUND IT SYMPATHETIC. "There is at least one thing that I can say in your favor," Raid his wife's mother, "and that is you're a great deal more attentive to the Scriptures than you used to be. But I Ruppoee that really I deserve most of the credit for it. I know that von never payed much atten- tion to the good book till after you married my daughter." "Yes, I pay more such matters how." "Woo. portion are you "'Lamentations.'' I confine my, self exclusively to that book," leaves histwo daughters about $x;},00(►. —Qt's of the tallest young ladiee in Nevada, says the Virginia Enter- prise, resides in Reno, She is the youngest of nine sisters, is twenty two years old and weighs 218 lbs,, and stands six feet one inch high in her stockings. THE HELPLESS AND HOPELESS. A joint address has been issued to the people of New York by the state grange, the farmers' union. and some of the labor organizations. Among the statements wade are the following :— You are to day confronted with a condition of taxation, which, if continued, will at no distant period confiscate more than half the farm. ing lands in the state—nej, by the state for pubiie use, but by un• taxed capital for the gratification of its insntiate greed .... This year the amount of state taxes voted by the legislature was $12,000,000.... The farming lands of thestate have actually decreased in value in the last ten years more than. 25 per cent, largely in consequence of increased and unjust taxation..... At least one-third of the farms and - homes of the working people are mortgaged for half their value. attention to roading?" AS YOU LIKE IT. —Mrs. Miry Brady, convicted a few days ago in Jersey City of being a common scold, was last week sen, 'tenced to pay a fine of $25 and costa. —Griffith Williams and a family of eight have left for Wales. They are' survivors of the Johnstown flood. One of the children, who was born in the attic of a house that was floating along tho stream, has been christened Moses. --Mrs. J. T. Murphy, of Alabama, died after suffering for eight yearn` on account of pains in her stotnach. Drs. Stevens and Davis performed a post mortem examination and found in the stomach considerably more than a pound of wood and a piece of cloth thirteen feet long. The woman "dipped" snuff and, it is supposed, chewed;aodewailowed her brushes, hut the physicians are at a lose to account for the presence of the cloth. —Henry Duncan, the Freewill Baptist preacher who recently mut, dered his wife in Dale county, Alabama, and eloped with a young lady of the neighborhood, was cap, tured and tried in the Circuit Court of Dale County, convicted, and Sens tented to death by hanging. —While bathing her baby sister at Little Rock, Ark., Tuesday, Sara Floyd, a young colored girl, dropped the child, who felt from a porch, a distance of twelve feet. While looking down at the baby the girl also fell, falling on the chiid and killing it almost instantly. —George Muth, on trial before tho Cincinnati, Ohio, police court on Tuesday for selling ice cream withs out a license on Sunday, pleaded guilty; and the court accepted the plea as a demurrer and discharged the prisoner, stating that the sate of ice cream was not regarded as •a luxury, but as a necessity. —At' Warsaw, Indiana, Mra. Martha Dinka has been arrestosi charged with murder, and her how band, Daniel, as an accessory. Danks recently became- a crank on religion, and, it is said, compelled his wife to strangle their fifteen months old child as a sacrifice, claimiug the Almighty had promised to resurrect the child on the third day. When Dauke was arrested he had been carrying the dead in - rant in his arms for two days. —A special to the Chicago Int—. Ocean' dated Lnkota, D. T:, July • I'8, says : There is no longer any doubt in the minds of Dakotans that there will be a shortage in the wheat crop of the Territory this year of about 28,000,000 bushels. In many counties, particularly Nel- son, there has been an almost total failure of crops of all kinds on account of the drought that has 80 tong prevailed. Ii► view of the fact that a large number of farmers in this and other counties have thus been deprived of their means of support, and will starve to death unless food and clothing sufficient to tide them through the winter is furnished, a mass,meoting of the leading business sten of the county was held here to -day to devise ways Sud means to bridge over the dktli, culty. A cental committee watt appointed to solicit aid for destitute farmers to . enable thein to live through the winter, and commence again in the spring. • —From where do all the Hies come? The question is often 'asked, and seldom receives as satisfsctary an answer.aS has been given by a contemporary : The common fly lays more than 100 eggs, and the time from egg laying to maturity is only about two weeks. Most 'of us have studied geometrical progreasion. Here we see it illustrated. Sup- pose one fly commences "to multiply and replenish the earth" about June 1. June 15, :if all lived, would give 150. Suppose seventy-five of these are females, July 1 would give us, supposing no cruel asp or other untoward circumstances to interfere, 11,250 flies. Suppose 5,, 625 of these are females, we might have July 15, 843,720 flies. For fear of bed dreams I will not calcu- late what might be by Sept. 15. —A North Carolina paper says : There is not a neighborhood from Maine to Mexico in which the nasal twang of the ideal Yankee, pitched to the highest key of Puritanic super morality, has not been he..rd. They org'rinized to despoil us of our property, aid sent their emissaries to incite the negroea I murder the families of their masters in bed at midnight. We do not love the Puritan. We know that through. out the long run of his breed be has been a liar, a cheat, and a fraud; a hypocrite, coward and suoundrel; a psalm,eingiug, canting, sniveling, unwholesome creature of the devil ; a narrow-minded, fiendish, mercite • demon in human form; the unclaim- ed of heaven, and the unownel of hell —Mose: Folsom, of Port Town send, sends the following sketch of the origin of the use of the letters "0. K.," which, he states, was furnished him personally by James Parton]:. While at Nashville in search of material for his history, Mr. Parton found among the re- cords of the court of which Gen. Jackson lead been judge a great many legal documents indorse I "0. R.," which meant "Order re- corded," but often so serawlingly written that one could easily rend it as 0. K. If "Itiajor Downing" noticed a bundle of legal papers, thus marked upon President Jack- son's table, documents, perhaps, from his former court, in which he still had interest, it is very easy to see how a punster could imagine it to be "0. K.," or 'eel! korrect." —Jake Morris, ,janitor of Georgia, and who belonged to every secret. society in the city, laughed himself to death last week. Ho attended the Masoliic Lodge, of which he was a member. When be "left the lodge room he waft accompanied by Prof. Otto Spahr, who had lost his hat and was compelled to go bareheaded until they reached Morris' ream. Prof. Spahr noticed that his friend laughed iwmoderately,a thing which seldom happened. In the morning Morris was found dead by the ser- vant. The theory 's that he laugh- ed so immoderately as to bring on palpitation of the heart, to which he was subject. Morris invested all his earnings in life insurauoe, and • .--per,—�---�- ReMo i ,1s� t Remover() I One Boor North of Young's .Baker g, Albert Street Our stock of Groceries and Provisions for spring and sumn►er are very couipletae ,and will be found Fresh and Reliable, embracing every line of Goods to be found in a-'irst- Class Grocery. We aim to give the Best possible Goods et:the Lowest Possible Price, and to economical buyers we offer many advantages. PRODUCE TAKEN. CANTELON BROS., Wholesale & Retail Grocers, Clinton. —The bill of a mosquito is a complex institution. It has a blunt fork at the head, and is ap- parently grooved. Work ing through the groove, and projecting from the angle of the fork, is a lance of per, fact form sharpened with a tine bevel. Beside it the most perfect lance looks like a hand saw. On either side of the lance two saws are arranged, with the points fine and sharp and the teeth well refined and keen. The back of these saws play against the lance. When the mos, quito alights with his peculiar hum, it thrusts its keen lance, and tben enlarges the aperture with the two saws, which .plav beside the lance until the forked bill with he capil- lary arrangement for pumping blood can. be inserted. The sewing pro- cess in what grates upon the nerves of the victim and causr • him to strike wildly at the sawyer. JUST FOR FUN. —A. New York judge had held that a dog is a domestic animal entitled to the peaceable pursuit of happiness, and that he (one cannot say "it" in this connection) is justi- fied in defending himself if asaailr i. No reasonable person will object to a pursuit of happiness on the part of a dog. It is when he pursues unwary citizens that there is a kick. —One of the funniest things that has happened in Greenville Tenn., for some time was the shooting of a negro the otber night by a police, man. The cop blazed away at the man and shot him in the elbow, the ball glancing and striking the negro in the cheek. As he llpit the ball out he said :-"Look heal), white man, you quit dat shootin' at me ; fur' thing,yuh known yuh gwinter .3� 13 g H oMtr'r �j d - m4 r" Gr! 8 doT�a* a psi °ln°isri �l o III 0442 % CO to S'Era a �p�g a• 0g� .o.�; g�6it r,H' rj. B cq� F a i4 lit c11-, �'F''.:J A O'bIS a . a es.2w to'"°ae r4 tri o' It giz 10`° - lo.3m�03l1H broke some 'specteble purson's I winder glare." • —"'W, -II," said Uncle Hiram,who timed to belong to a singing club in his Carly days, "I never heard •n woman play like that womat: we heard in Boston that night. It wan joat awful. My ears ache even now." "Yee," replied his nephew "she was rather loud, that's a fact. But then her execution—" "George," exclaimed the old gentle- man, as he seized his nephew .ly the arm, "You don't mean to say that that they went as far as that? Well 'tian't for me to judge them, I ou&y heard' her once. It seems terrible—a woman, too: but then they had listened to her every night. And they won't have to hear her again. Perhaps it was all for the best , George." MRS. FLYNN AND THE GOAT. Mrs. Flynn, of Toronto, relates with much pathos an incident in her ijfe that graphically illustrates woman's truthfulness and man's perfidy. "Oi was in the market wan mornin' lookin' for some mate, an' a Dooch butcher axed me how an illegaut bit av spring lamb wad soot. Oi sed it wad do of it waz good, an' he said, it waz the best in the market or he wudn't be bfferin' it to a lady loike meself. Oi'm fond av opting lamb, an' so Oi took a hunk av it home an' cooked it fer me ould mon an' meself. "May the divil take me av it tasted roight. It had a sort.av a rank an' romantic flavor thet Oi niver kem across afore, an' heaven help me, may Oi never come across it again! "01 kept me jaw to meself an' said nathin'. After dinner the ould mon said the spring lamb tasted kind o' quare an' he wander- ed had Oi cooked the baste enough, Oi said Oi had cooked the baste- joest roight, an' Oi saw nathin' wrong wid the taste av it. "Whin the ould mon had gone out to wurruk Oi tuck a luck at the chunk av mate that was left an' phat.do you tisk Oi sawl A bit av the skin av the varmint an' it had hair on it instead av wool, begorra. Tho thavin' Dootchman had Bole me goat instead of lamb I Bad luk to him 1 "01 coodn't afford to lose the mate,d'ye eee, an' so Oi kept nre jaw to mesilf an' said nothin' agin. Oi stewed it up wid spices an' tinge to disguoise the taste, an' we had it agin fer supper. Oi told the ould mon Oi didn't care fer enny spring lamb fer supper, but it wuz very beautiful cooked up wid spicas, an' he needed plenty av mate now that he wuz workin' wid the Park Commissioners. He ate awhoile, an' thin he sed the spring lamb tasted kind o' quare, an' he thought it wuz too high toned for ue. "'Now, me darlint,' Oi sed, tho spring Iamb is a little high toned, but it is none too good for the loikee of ue an' ye moost ate hearty eo ye can do good wurruk for the Park Commissioners." "Ho sed the Park Commissioners be bloomed, an' he coed do good enough wurrk for them on roast bate, an' Oi git roast bafe the nixt toimel "01 sed, 'My darlint, av coorse Oi'll git roast bafe the nixt toime, but we mooet ate all the spring lamb fopret:' "Well, ye see it took me boos - band several days to git away wid the spring lamb, but he foinly got trough wid the job, an' then Oi tuck the bit of skin wid the hair on, phat I had saved as a guarantay av goodfaith,an Oi wint down to the market. Oi hunted up me beauti- ful Dootchman, an' sez Oi : "'Have yez any noico mato thie- marnin; Dootchy 1' "'Pkat koind wad you loike this mornin', Mrs. Flynn 1' eez he. "'Oi ate nathing but the best,' sez 0 i. "'How wad a voice bit ov spring lamb soot?' eez he. (a] 14 pg 'M ° CA W° co to' utC • �� °w t2 43 43e oa Up _Lai e d .• E+v tyi - alC ea Pe 'Da. Eveta sura shier lw. aelen eistd catettata prepared preserreas 1 Awed mass t yespeci by or the vp1T, ' These' specifics euro without' d uw, Dlnr* Ing or reducing the system, and are "tics ala deedthesoverefgn reaiedleaoftktWr1d. Lisr Or rai8ClrLL 508. CUaIS...... 03W0r=. ggs,,ver• Congestion.lnfamglatlon ,... Wo�rrule Worm Fever WOrm'couc.... ryln ,Colic orToe%binaofIntanyi .� seureape, ot'Children orndults ., ,a vacate? orlping BWOua CoUc .. iop r4 jlf orbs'. v 11141 •qQ , old BrQno its P, '�oothach e 1 i yrtPlipltta: pineal lip/ *eta,,.. . 1' uIteMC`ough otttyluaolettlt . pthing— vea aa~d'r earaast.Hplaris dis. mad °rm./son lare iInfluenza, Cold inthe Head kgop� astir vloientcousin'. overal t kol11tY.P{iyslcalWeakness , 144.07 is 1t••,..., .,.....4gold by Druggists, or lent postpaid on reostp$ of pprice. Ds,_Hurras$T$' sanest., (tut pamoo rtopty bound In cloth and gold, mailed free. Hist.Ykreyk'MQdip1•44.4 iosJralton8t.NY. I years in private pticew thereeu.andforover tai.tk inmost err ciao ea�lat poi'sfor Daa►•d. S opts it a. 10aceachadacke•, 8kkHea he. Vertigo• • • rear Weakness, Wea Bed,ireg ea of tkelteart,PaiPhatlon*. SPECT FI CSa► WHLLS & RICHARDSON CO. Agent•, DIONTRBAL. "'Tanks; sez Oi. 'Spring lamb is a bit 'high-toned for me. Oi'll take a foine large steak, ov ye plaza.' "'About how large 1' sez ho "'About tin pounds,' sez 0i, 'an' a foine juicy wan, av ye plaza.' "So Oi tuk the steak; au takin' a good grip ov it, Oi clammed it round his big Dootch ears till he yelled bloody' murther in fourteen lan- guages. 'The nixt toime ye sell me goat for spring lamb, ye thavin' Dootchman'—an' Oi kept bastin' him around the ugly lugs—'the nixt time ye sell me goat, Oi say, Oi'll make ye ate his tvhaskers 1';" HOW TO COAX A MAN TO PROPOSE. An elderly man was telling a group of giddy young girls the other day how he proposed to his wife when he was a young man. She was sewing at the time, he said, or he never would have had the courage to do it. If girls would sew more he thinks they would have mere matrimonial chances. Sewing he considers the best accomplishment that a woman can have. A woman engaged with a needle has a domestic, homelike air that is irrestible to a man who loves her. It is a picture of what she would be in her own home, and makes him long that it should be his also. How can a man pro- pose to a girl who sits straight up in her chair staring hard at him with o pair of bright eyes 1 But when she is bending gracefully over a bit of plain •or fancy sewing, apparently absorbed in counting the stitches, and the arrows of her eyes are sheathed for a 'few minutes, he plucks up courage enough to offer her his heart and hand. The average young man is bashful in such affairs, though bold enough at other times, and needs encouragement and opportunities. What sort of en- couragement is a pair of bright eyes staring into his, watching his embarrassment? Listen • to the advice of an old man who has been all through it; drop your eyes and give the young man a chance. Re- member this, girls, when the favourite ' young man drops in to make an evening visit, get out your bit of fancy work and look domestic, •and with every stitch of your needle you will bind his heart more firmly to your own. NATIONAL PILLS are sugar coated, mild but thorough, and are the best Stomach . and Liver Pills in use. NEWSPAPER LAWS We call the special attention of Post nesters and subscribers to the following iynopeis of the newspaper laws1—A postmaster is required to ive notice EY LETTER (returning a paper does not answer the law) when a subscriber does not take his paper out of the ounce, and state the reason for its not being taken. Any neglect to do so makes the postmaster responsible to the publishers for payment. '1 —If any person orders his paper dis- soutinned, he must pay all arreareges,the publisher may continue to senduntil payment is made, and collect the whole amount, whether it be taken fron bhe otGce or not. There can be no legal discontinuance nntil the payment is made, 3—Any person who takes a paper fronsthe post-ofice, whether directed to hit name or another, or whether he has sub. cribed or not, is responsible for th. pay. 4—If a subscriber orders his paper to bt stopped at a certain time, and the publish, or continues to sand, 1t the subscriber n bound to pay for it if he takes it out of the post•ofce. This l,roceedsOpen the ground that a man must pay for what ire use* *''In the Division Court in Godorich at the November sitting a newspaper ut- Inbar sued for pay of paper. The defend. ant objected paying on the ground that lie had ordered a former proprietor of the paper to discontinue it. The Judge held that that was not a valid defense. The plaintiff, the present' proprietor, had no noti;e to discontinue and consequently could collect, although it was not denied that defendant had notified former pro- prietor to discontinue. In any event defonant was bound to pay for the time he had received the paper and until he had paid all arrears due for subscription. `1 BILI• HEADS, NOTE Ile,.de, Letter Heade, (Tags, Statements, Circulars. Business Cards, Envelopes, Programmee, etc., etc., prinlei in M workman- like manner and at low raise. THE NEWS•RECOISD Office. TO THE FARMERS. Study your own interest and gowhere you .can get Reliable Harness, I manufacture none brat toe n*dr or Sroes. Beware of slops that sell cheap, as 014 how pot to line. lar Call and get prices. Orders by man proinpiy attended to JOHN T. cafe-1:VrE a HARNESS EMPORIUM, HLYTII, ONT. BUSINESS ANNOUNCEMENT, COiRRESPONDENCE. We will at all times be pleased to - receive items of news from our sub= scribers. We want a good corres vondent in every locality, not already represented, to send us RELIABLE news. SUDSCRIRERS. 'Patrons who do not receive their paper regularly from the carrier or thr nigh their • local post offices will confer a favor by reporting at this office at , once. Subscriptions may commence at any tine. ADVERTISERS. Advertisers will please bear in ,Hind that all "oranges" of advertisements, to ensure insertion, should be handed in not later than MONDAY NOON Of each week. CIRCULATION. • THE NEWS -RECORD has a larger circulation than any other paper in this section, and as an advertising medium has feta equals in Ontario. Our books are open to those who mean business. JO It PRINTING. The Job Department of this jour- nal is one of the best equipped in Western Ontario, and a superior class of work is guaranteed at very loin pricer. DR. FOWLERS •EXT: OF • '-WILD' TR,IWBERRYI CURES ROOM holeraMorbus O Lr 1 C- RAMPS G ARR KEA YSENTERY AND ALL SUMMER COMPLAINTS AND FLUXES OF THE BOWELS IT iS SAFE AND RELIABLE FOR CHILDREN OR ADULTS.