The Huron Expositor, 1955-12-09, Page 10p4.
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AtIPPAT EXPOSITOR, SEAFORTH, ONT., DEC 9, 1955
ON EXPOSITOR
Established 1860
A. Y. McLean, Editor
ublished at Seaforth, Ontario,
►:,ry Thursday morning by McLean
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SEAFORTH, Friday, December 9
Worthwhile Program
The annual gathering of 4-H
Youth of Huron County to receive
the awards which they had won dur-
ing the year's program points up the
broad and beneficial impact the 4-H
program has on the young boy and
girl of rural Huron.
This year the Achievement pro-
gram was held in the new Wingham
District High School auditorium,
moving there from Exeter High
School, where it previously had been
held. The change might quite pro-
perly be, the first indication of a new
policy which would result in the
award night being held each year in
a different centre in the county.
At Wingham nearly 500 boys and
girls were honored for their achieve-
ments in the various clubs sponsored
under the program. In the attaining
of their honors, those who took part
gained the benefits inherent in the
4-H program.
Typical of, those who participated
in the program was Murray Gaunt,
of Lucknow, who advanced through
various stages of 4-H work to win
the Queen's guineas at the Royal
Winter Fair, Toronto, and thus bring
honor to Huron County.
The movement to train the head
and hands and to influence the heart
and health of rural youth in Can-
ada had its beginnings in different
parts of the country just before the
First Great War. Over the years it
has had many names and many types
of programs, but its basic objectives
remain the same. Quite simply, 4-H
Club Work is designed to influence
farm people to adopt better methods
of farming and homemaking, to help
them to solve their own problems by
training the young people to organ-
ize and to accept the responsibilities
of citizenship. With membership
now approaching the 73,000 mark,
it's impossible to measure in known
terms the influence of 4-H Club work
in rural areas or on the national econ-
omy of Canada. Improved dairy
and beef herds, new seeds and new
strains for grain, fruits and vege-
tables, new techniques of food pre-
paration aid preservation are but a
few instances of the practical re-
sults of 4-H Club Work.
4-H Clubs are making major con-
tributions to an improved Canada.
The clubs train young men arid wo-
men for leadership; they improve
farms and therefore the community
as a whole by introducing better ag-
ricultural and homemaking prac-
tices; they encourage co-operative
community effort for the common
good and by helping to build a finer
rural life they contribute substan-
tially to the development of a more
satisfying Canadian culture.
We, as citizens, owe a debt of
gratitude to those who, as leaders,
contribute so freely of their time and
talents to further the 4-H program.
Farmers Ask Fair Deal
Ontario farmers, through the Fed-
eration of Agriculture, have set out
in a brief to Ontario Premier Frost,
problems that are troubling the
farming industry. The brief asks
action by Premier Frost in a num-
ber of fields within the provincial
jurisdiction.
Discussing and agreeing with the
brief, the London• Free Press has
this to say: "Ontario cannot hope
to enjoy continuing prosperity if a
group as large and vital as our farm
population fails to share it. Nor can
we continue a real democracy if there
"e wont 4lass citizens.
'�:l�dtgly the,.Ontario Federa-
p r;„iii'tieultrtt e.,did a service to
the whole community by presenting
a comprehensive brief to the Ontario
Cabinet. A wide range of subjects
was covered and it is admitted that
not all lie within the jurisdictiono
the province. Nor can the proving
or any Government, remedy all the
grievances.
"We are all more or less aware of
the shift away from agriculture
which has many causes. But it was
interesting to learn that the farm-
ers feel that there has been a change
from free competition to a conflict
of groups for economic power, and
that they are falling behind in this
struggle. Furthermore, they are de-
termined to take whatever steps are
necessary to prevent themselves
from falling still further behind.
"They point out that while in-
comes generally have been rising,
farm income in Ontario dropped 28
per cent between 1951 and 1953 and
another 12 per cent in 1954. Nor is
there any indication that the drop
has stopped.
"Co-operative marketing is one
possible answer, and the federation
seeks firm enabling legislation from
whatever body has jurisdiction. It is
also interested in many matters
which affect the community as a
whole, such as conservation and
health insurance.
"It is doubtful if farmers can be
made prosperous by act of Parlia-
ment. Indeed it may well be that
much of the current difficulty in ag-
riculture in many lands stems from
well -meant Government interven-
tion. But whatever can be done
should be done. Farmers should at
least be given every chance to help
themselves. It is to be hoped that the
the most careful study, followed by
appropriate action, will be given the
federation briefs at all legislative
levels."
Easy Permits
(Peterborough Examiner)
The Toronto police have found a
man (in an accident, we need hard-
ly say) who cannot read, write or
speak English, but who has an On-
tario driver's license. We should
like to know if there is any disabil-
ity so horrific that it debars a man
from getting a license?
Carol Time
(Calgary Albertan)
Last year, as we recall it, the radio
stations mercifully refrained from
playing Christmas carols until just
a couple of weeks before Christmas.
This favor is not to be granted this
year, one would gather. Already
both legitimate and counterfeit car-
ols have been heard.
The complaint is not against car-
ols as such. It is that such noble and
sacred music should be thus profan-
ed. -Carols were not meant to be din-
ned into the public's ear five weeks
before Christmas.
Christmas is a f tival and a holy -
day to which people uld look for-
ward with joy, and caro are a love-
ly part of that anticipation. Destroy
the anticipation and you defame
Christmas.
One Voter in a Hundred
(Fergus News -Record)
The crowd at the Fergus nomina-
tion was the smallest in many years.
There was really no excuse for that.
The auditorium is a comfortable
place to spend an evening, yet fewer
than 25 persons, apart from office-
holders, were there. Town Clerk
Ken Graham decided it would be ab-
surd to call a dozen Then to the plat-
form when there would be less than
two dozen in the audience. As a dis-
play of democracy in action, it was
depressing.
It wasn't as if this had been an un-
important year in the history of Fer-
gus. Quite the contrary. It has
been one of the most important years
in the history of the town. Some of
the members of Council have given
freely of their time, "far beyond the
call of duty," as the wartime phrase
used to put it. No doubt, the major-
ity of ratepayers were satisfied. But
they might have turned out to let
the elected representatives know it.
The Council spends, or passes on to
other bodies to spend, a quarter of a
million dollars of the ratepayers'
money, according to figures given by
Reeve Denny. The council members
are therefore directors of a large and
important corporation.
ur:
Separateci by TB
Tuberculosis separates this mother from her baby. Yet TB ",n be
prevented. For funds to support rear -round program of IIB prevention
and control, the tuberculosis associations are now conducting their annual
Christmas Seal Sale.
SEEN IN THE COUNTY PAPERS
Boy Swallows Kerosene
Rudy Jensen, two-year-old son
of Mr. and Mrs. Jan Jensen, R.R.
3, Wingham. was treated at the
Wingham General Hospital after
swallowing a quantity of kerosene
at his home on Sunday. His condi-
tion is described as satisfactory.—
Wingham Advance -Times.
10,000 Visit Museum
The historic committee reported
to Huron County Council last week
that about 10,000 person.s paid ad-
mission to the county museum dur-
ing the past season. A grant of
$560 was received from the Pro-
vince of Ontario. During the year
more than 300 new exhibits were
added to the museum, including '
three large, machines, 75 feet of
new showcases and a two-storey
20x24 foot addition at the south-
east corner. Two lots owned by
Goderich Public School at the rear
of the museum were .secured for I
$1,000 with a frontage of 104 feet
to keep the museum property in-
tact.—Clinton News -Record.
Theft At Rummage Sale
A good crowd turned out to pa-
tronize the annual Lions rummage
sale held in the Memorial Hall on
Saturday afternoon. A regrettable
feature of the event was the theft
of two new blankets which were'
lifted from one of the tables and
carried away during the early
hours of the sale. In view of the
excellent work the Lions Club does
in so many needy cases through-
out the community. it is regret-
table that some one would take
advantage of a situation to re-
move the two best articles that
were on display at the sale. As,
we all'have a conscience we can
imagine that the parties involved
will feel anything but the full com-
fort of these blankets as they use
them. Suffice it to say that every
effort will be made to have the
blankets returned to the club.—
Blyth
lub—Blyth Standard,
Trailer Home Fire
Approximately $1.200 damage
was done to a trailer owned by
Nathaniel Thomson in the villa..^,e
of Whitechurch on Wednesday
morning last. when flames, caus-
ed by an explosion, gutted the in-
terior of the structure. Mr. Thom-
son, who was away in Lucknow at
the time of the fire, had been liv-
ing in the trailer for the past year.
First intimation that something
was wrong came when villagers in
the general store across the street
heard an explosion in the trailer.
They came running across the road
and Tom Morrison managed to
tear off the gas cylinder on the
outside of the trailer before they
were able to explode from the
heat inside. — Wingham Advance -
Times.
Fined For Hunting Deer
Because he didn't want to pay
$36 for a non-resident deer hunt-
ing license, a Saskatchewan man
wound up paying $50 and costs for
hunting deer without a license at
Magistrate's Court, Goderich, on
Thursday last. George Fortney,
who is visiting a brother in Mild-
may, was found with a loaded shot-
gun sitting in a car in the Ford-
wich area, by Conservation Offi-
cer W. R. Wormorth, of Wingham.
The rest of the party were hunt-
ing in the bush nearby. Fortney
testified he had gone to Walkerton
for a license, but thought $36 was
too much to pay. Magistrate D. E.
Holmen gave Fortney the minimum
sentence. Maximum sentence is
$200 and costs.—Goderich Signal -
Star.
Drillers Hit Big Salt Bed
Diamond drilling near the mouth
of the Maitland River since last
August resulted Saturday after-
noon in hitting a big salt bed at
a depth of 953 feet. This is only
the second time diamond drilling
has been done for salt in the Gode-
rich area. the first being in 1876.
Diamond drilling is not to be con-
fused with the digging of brine
wells. some 20 of which have been
produced here over the years.
"There's a mysterious atmosphere
at the harbor resulting from a
number of things which have tak-
en place recently and I wouldn't
be a bit surprised to see something
taking place before too long," said
Mayor Huckins.—Goderich Signal -
Star.
CROSSROADS
(By JAMES SCOTT)
What is Cruel?
Quite a lot of people have stop-
ped me on the street lately to
mention what was said in this
space about Christmas toys One
reader. however, has taken the
trouble to write in disagreement.
This reader is a biologist and
takes the stand that I ought to
know better than to say that a
toy which is a snake swallowing
a mouse represents all that is
"brutal and cruel and treacher-
ous in nature."
The argument advanced is that
this is the way the Lord made the.
snake and that for it to lie in
wait for the unwary mouse and
then swallow it alive is perfectly
natural.
Now this is undoubtedly quite
right. It is perfectly natural—for
the snake that is.
But we are not concerned with
snakes. What we are dealing with
at Christmas time—and the other
three hundred and sixty-four clays
of the year too—are the tender.
impressionable minds of small
children. I submit that, natural
or not. there are many things
done in the world of nature which
are contrary to the code most of
us believe in (even though we
don't practise it too well often
enough). I mean the Christian
concept of generosity, love, com-
passion and forgiveness.
Certainly as the snake swallows
the mouse it is feeling none of
these things. Maybe it never
feels them. I doubt that my biolo-
gist friend can say for sure whe-
ther it does or not. But we be-
lieve in them and we somehow
sense that we would have a bet-
ter and more bearable world if we
were able to put these values in-
to practise more regularly. And
that's why I object to these toys.
Not because they are false depic-
tions of want is sometimes called
"natural law," but because I be-
lieve that natural law is not en-
ough for human beings.
As I write this, I am thinking
of something which happened to
me not long ago. Like the rest of
us, sooner or later we come upon
somebody who disappoints us and
does what we call a "dirty trick."
Well, that happened to me and I
was plenty upset. I was full of
schemes to repay the scoundrel.
Then last Sunday, with all this
still in my heart, I went to Church.
and the lesson for that night was
the twelfth chapter of Romans.
Here are a couple of verses
which the .minister read:
"Recompense no man evil with
evil. Provide things honest in the
sight of all men. If it be possible,
as much as lieth in you, live
peacebly with all men. Dearly
beloved,, avenge not yourselves but
rather give place unto wrath: for
it is written, Vengeance is mine,
saith the Lord; I will repay."
It was a wonderfully comfort-
able experience tq come out of
that church with the terrible load
of resentment and. -vengeance lift-
ed from my shoulders.
Now you will not too often find
such things in the world of nature.
The code there, as my biologist
reader points out so clearly, is
quite different. With this I have
no quarrel. But it does a man
good to remember that he is not
an animal. It does a' man good to
realize that he has capacities for
good which will ennoble and up-
lift him if he gives them a chance.
I think he is more likely to give
these things a chance if he has a
childhood where love and gentle-
ness and forgiveness are stress-
ed.
So I'm right back to the point
where I started. Christmas is the
time for remembering that we are
men made in God's image, and
that the greatest gift of God, is
peace to the weary souls of men
through the,•Prince,of Peace whose
birthday we celebrate December
25th.
YEARS ALONE
Interesting Items • picked
from The Huron Expositor of
25, 50 and 75 Years Ago.
From The Huron Expositor
December 12, 1930
Mr. Fred Youngblut, who is
working in Brussels, spent the
weekend with his parents, Mr. and
Mrs. Joe Youngblut, of Constance.
Mrs. Matt Armstrong has return-
ed to her home in Constance after
spending some time with her son,
Fred Armstrong, in Grimsby.
Miss Dorothy Broadfoot has re-
turned to Tuckersmith after spend-
ing a few days in Guelph.
Miss Grace Forrest, of Scott
Memorial Hospital, visited with
her parents, Mr. and Mrs. William
Forrest, Tuckersmith, on Sunday.
Mrs. MeAsh, of London, has re-
turned to spend some time with
her mother, Mrs. Weekes, of Var-
na.
Mr. and Mrs. M. E. Clarke and
family, of Winthrop, spent the
weekend with friends in and around
Varna.
Miss Elva Bolton, accompanied
by Dr. J. Spellman, of Kitchener.
and her sisters, Doris and Norma,
of London, and Ada and Maude,
of Seaforth, spent the weekend with
Mr. and Mrs. Gordon Bolton, Hen-
sall.
Miss Mary Beale, of Dublin.
spent Wednesday in Kitchener.
Mr. Frank McClinchey, of Stan-
ley, spent the weekend with friends
in Seaforth.
Rev. W. A. Bremner, of Bruce -
field, spent the week in St. Thomas
visiting friends.
Mrs. Margaret Ferguson return-
ed to her home in Bayfield after
having spent two weeks in Seaforth
and Waterloo.
Miss Dorothy Kerslake, of Toron-
to, spent the weekend with her par-
ents. Mr. and Mrs. W. E. Kers-
lake, Seaforth.
Messrs. Andrew Beattie, of Lon-
don, and Walter Beattie. of De-
troit, were weekend guests at the
home of Mr. and Mrs. John Beat-
tie. Seaforth.
Mr. David Papple. of Tucker -
smith. is at present in Scott Mem-
orial Hospital.
Mrs. Cecil Knight, who spent the
weekend in Seaforth, has returned
to Kitchener. accompanied by her
daughter, Lois.
Miss Anna Sutherland. of Toron-
to, spent the weekend with her
parents, Mr. and Mrs. A. D. Suth-
erland, Seaforth.
From The Huron Expositor
December 8, 1905
Miss Drysdale, of Hensall, is vis-
iting her _cousin. Miss Iva Stephen-
son, Varna.
Mrs. J. B. McArthur. Hensall, is
at the parsonage at Lyons, visiting
her sister, Mrs. Shaw.
Miss Olive Sillery, who was vis-
iting her brother, Dr. F. A. Sillery,
Hensall, returned to her home in
Kincardine on Saturday.
Mr. and Mrs. John Millson, of
Orillia, have returned home after
an extended visit among friends
and acquaintances around Kinburn.
Miss Killoran, Seaforth, has re-
turned from a pleasant visit with
her sisters and other friends in
Toronto.
Mr. Dick. proprietor of the Sea -
forth Woollen Mills. was in town
this week and had a conference
with members of the council. Citi-
zens will regret to learn that Mr.
Dick has found it necessary to
close the mill for a time at least.
Mrs. George N. McLaren and
daughter arrived in Brussels last
Saturday from Midland. and have
taken up their residence in R. R.
Ross's house. Mrs. McLaren's
mother. Mrs. Morrow. accompan-
ied them.
Miss Maud Querrin. of Brussels,
is visiting friends in Berlin.
Mr. John O'Keefe. Seaforth, ship-
ped two carloads of fine Christmas
steers this week.
t
From The Huron Expositor
December 10. 1880
About 7 o'clock Tuesday morn-
ing Brussels was startled by the
alarm of fire. which proved to be
the residence of Rev. Mr. Jones,
on Turnberry St. The fire origin-
ated in a bedroom upstairs. By
the strenuous exertions of the fire
brigade, the fire was confined to
one room. Loss was estimated at
$150, and no insurance was car-
ried.
Mr. James Weir, of Hay. has
sold his farm. consisting of 100 ac-
res of land and situated near the
village of Hensall. to Mr. Robert
McArthur, of Tuckersmith.
Mr. Robert Henley, of Exeter,
who has spent the summer work-
ing at his trade in Chicago. has
just returned home.
Mr. B. Newell. of Brucefield. left
on Tuesday for Paris, where he
intends spending a couple of
months in the extensive agricul-
tural implement manufactory of
Mr. David Maxwell, to learn more
of the business.
Mr. A. Bishop. M.P.P. for South
Huron, was in Seaforth on Tues-
day. He says the railway fever is
raging in Usborne.
Mr. T. McMillan. youngest son
of Mr. John McMillan, reeve of
Hullett, who has been sojourning
in the Old Country for several
months, has sailed for home. and
is expected to arrive in a few
days.
The Rev. Mr. Cockburn, a blind
minister, delivered an interesting
discourse in Egmondville Church
on Monday evening.
Mr. John McKenzie has rented
his farm on the 4th concession of
Tuckersmith, L.R.S., to Mr. Philip
Botz.
Mr. George Sproat, of Tucker -
smith, last week sold a bull calf
for $100. He also sold another to
Mr. John Shipley, or near Clinton,
for a good figure. They were both
fine animals.
"What do you take for your in-
somnia?"
"A glass of wine at regular in-
tervals."
"Does that make you sleep?"
"No, but i t makes me satisfied
to stay_ awake "
r (tips.)
rt
tMl¢Ae;.
Christmas shopping has not real-
ly got into high gear yet. One of
these days it will really happen.
Men all of a sudden will remem-
ber that they have done nothing
towards Christmas. The women
folk who have been planning a
long time ahead, and are methodi-
cally drawing up their list, will
really go to town. Then -the prob-
lem will arise, what to do with
the things that have been bought
until the great day dawns. In any
home there, of course, are little
nooks and corners which can be
pressed into service. If these
prove too small there are always
the neighbors.
The Scrooges among us will not
be too happy about all this. They
look on it as another method of
prying money out of their pocket
books. It is all too commercializ-
ed they will say; there is too much
high pressure advertising and any-
way people only give because oth-
ers are giving.
Now, there may be some truth
in this. but what would a mere
man do about getting ready for
Christmas were it not for the ad-
vertisements. A popular pastime
these days is watch the mere man
scanning the newspapers. and not
always the funnies and the sportt,.
ing page, but the ladies' wear and
toilet advertisements as well. It
is alright. How is a man to know
otherwise.
When the Scrooges in our midst
tell us that the whole celebration
of Christmas is an unhealthy cus-
tom, each person giving presents
because others are doing it, they
may have something. There is no
doubt we are all moved to action
by convention and custom. We
have to keep in the swim or drown.
We have a sneaking suspicion
though, that many of those who
complain about having to bow to
convention just want to get out
from under the responsibility of
doing the generous thing. So even
if social pressures make them
loosen up a bit, it is good for their
souls. After all, there are those
who would rarely spend a nickle
on a good cause if custom or con-
vention did not compel them to do
so. If so-called commercialization
helps to force a man to become
unselfish, we are for it, even
though on general principles we
are opposed to compulsion.
But we like to think that this
giving and receiving of gifts,
which may be overdone a bit. in
certain quarters. has a much deep-
er purpose and origin than ap-
pears on the surface. It is based
on the first Christmas when the
greatest gift that man ever re-
ceived was presented to him. In
these days of wars. hot. cold or
warm. days of tension, national
and personal greed, it is good to
know that during- one season of
the year at least, we can concen-
trate 'on the welfare of others to
the exclusion of our own selfish
interests. . After all. that is one
of the deep meanings of Christ-
mas.
MIN
FARM NEWS'
Farm News of Huron
Two heavy snowfalls were re-
ceived in the county 'last week,
which brought a hault to all out-
side activities. The Fourth An-
nual Huron ,County Fall Hereford
Sale saw tebulls bring an aver-
age of $339 each, and 12 bred fe-
males $250, with 35 head in the
sale selling for an average of $253.
Artificial Lights For Layers
Artificial lights to maintain egg
production during the shorter days
of the winter months will make a
laying flock more profitable. How-
ever, the effectiveness of lights
will depend on their proper use,
report poultry officials at the
Brandon Experimental Farm, Man-
itoba, Canada Department of Agri-
culture.
Lighting should commence in
time to maintain a 12 -hour day
once daylight alone is inadequate.
This is sufficient while production
is on the increase, but should be
stepped up to a minimum of 13
hours when production levels off.
Once started, the lighting sche-
dule must be regular. An abrupt
reduction in either length of time
or strength of light may cause egg
production to stop. A time switch
is considered essential to insure
against forgetfulness. When lights
are started in fall, there is noth-
ing to be gained by doing this gra-
dually. However, when they are
discontinued a gradual 15 'minutes
per week reduction is recommend-
ed.
Laying houses should have one
40 -watt bulb for each 200 square
feet of floor space. When all-night
lights are used, this intensity may
be reduced to one-third.
The location of the lights will
depend on the type and width of
the house. In houses not more
than 24 feet wide. the lights should
be placed in a single 'row at in-
tervals not exceeding 10 feet, mid-
way between the roosting quarter's
and the front of the house. In wid-
er houses a double row of lights
is necessary. The lights should he
suspended about six feet from the
floor. The greatest light intensity
should fall on the water fountains
and feeders, with a lesser amount
on the roosting quarters to induce
the hens to leave them.
Aside from convenience there
apparently is little difference in
the various methods of supplying
light. If morning light is provid-
ed, feed and water must be avail-
able at the time the lights come
on. When the birds are receiving
light and feed in, the evening, it
is necessary to have a dimming
device to induce them to return to
the roosts.
Vibriosis in Cattle
Over the years, abortions in cat-
tle have been responsible for sev-
ere economic losses to livestock
farmers. These losses rave arisen
through a reduction in calf crop
bringing increased expenditures
for replacement stock, and also
through decreased milk yields.
Until a few years ago the conta-
gious infection Brucellosis. com-
monly known as Bangs Disease,
was considered mainly responsible
for the contagious condition. In
1948 an infectious organism which
caused abortion in cattle was iden-
tified in Ontario as Vibrio foetus.
This organism set up a condition
somewhat similar to Bangs dis-
ease and was referred to as Vi-
briosis.
Viobriosis in cattI is not a new
disease. It is apparently quite
widespread having been reported
from Great Britain and the United
States, Holland, Australia a n d
South Africa. In British Columbia
interest was first stimulated in
the disease in 1951.
When the infection is first intro-
duced into a herd there is usually
a high incidence of infertility with
return to service at irregular per-
iods. A high percentage of abor-
tions occur from the fifth to the
seventh month of pregnancy.
These symptoms are substantiat-
ed by a report in the Canadian
Journal of Comparative Medicine
and Veterinary Science written by
I. W. Moynihan and P. L. Stovell
of the Animal Pathology Division,
Canada Department of Agriculture
Branch Laboratory in Vancouver,
B.C.
Further studies are reported in
a more recent issue of the same
journal by J. F. Frank, of the Ani-
mal Pathology Division. Canada
Department or Agriculture, Sack-
ville, N.B. Dr. Frank concludes
from his studies that infection did
not result in sterility as a herd
problem.
Animals which abort and ani-
mals which are .about to abort
should be segregated. Soiled lit-
ter should be colljected and de-
stroyed and disinfectants should
be used liberally. In infected
herds natural breeding should be
stopped and artificial insemination
should be employed, as infected
bulls are the main source of in-
fection.
It is the general opinion of sev-
eral men who have studied Vi-
briosis that under practical condi-
tions of herd management. pre-
vention of spread of infection with-
in a herd would seem to be impos-
sible.
A SMILE OR TWO
One out of every five families in
Newfoundland has seven or more
persons.
A man went to a mental spe-
cialist.
"What seems to be the trouble?"
asked the doctor.
The patient replied by vigorously
brushing imaginary things off his
arm, explaining. "See? I have
dragons on my sleeve."
Backing away the specialist
screamed, "Well you don't have to
brush them off onto me!"
Mother: "Before you get serious
with that boy friend of yours, be
sure he is always kind and con-
siderate."
Daughter: "Oh, I'm sure of
that, mother. Why, only the other
day he told me that he put his
shirt on a horse that was scratch-
ed."
The quack was selling an elixir
which he declared would make
men live to a great age.
"Look at me," he shouted. "Hale
and hearty, and I'm over 300 years
old."
"Is he really as old as that?"
asked a listener of the youthful
assistant.
"I can't say," replied the assist-
ant. "I've only worked for him.
for 100 years!"
A father. pushing a baby car-
riage down the sidewalk, was try-
ing vainly to pacify his howling:
two-year-old. "Don't get excited.
Andy. Now take it easy, Andy.
You must be calm. Andy."
A lady who happened to be pass-
ing by stopped and remarked, "It's
just wonderful the way you speak
to that child. It's so rarely that
you see ssuch gentle fathers. And
he's named Andyl, the little dar-
ling?"
"No, madam," growled the
father. "His name is Joseph. My
name's Andy"
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