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HomeMy WebLinkAboutThe Huron Expositor, 1938-08-05, Page 5ti 0 0 0 0 l�l THE WORLD'S GOOD NEWS fl will come to your home every day through THE CHRISTIAN SCIENCE MONITOR An international Daily Nvwspsper It records for you- the world's clean,•constructive doings. The Montt., does not exploit crime or sensatioi4; neither does it ignore there, but deals correctively with them. Features for busy men and all tb family, including the weekly Magazine Section. The Christian Science Publishing society L_ one. Norway Street, Boston; Massachusetts ' Please enter my subeesIpttoa to The Christian Setenie-toh'lievciaiil. , a i eyrear iod $19.00 6 atonths f 6:00 3 monthfs 83.00 1 dioattl Wednesday issue, weaklingMISadne Sec WI 1 tear $2.60. 6 issues Name ddtireu r0;4leCO10 .. R 04 POO pi til 11 YN , Shu iri < NI0 . bench ,■51'^#J'J Df ERN y ,AIR' C + NDIfTIONI s '1 , lx = NG ' FrNo . ' ld a►gd The, Three Meetal'iteer6t Ingtone, Ray Cq'i"iaan, ceTerhette elaUNSIVIONE NANCH"- AIl e.. LeW A reo - Hellen "KING OF'` HE :N'EWSBOYIS" : Bob L.iv- Max• -Mack 'Mit/Mai-1T, SHOW Str,nday, Aug. 7; beglnninp at 12.05 Monday; Tuesday, Wednesday Loretta Young Richard Greene ' "FOUR MEN AND A PRAYER" David Niven, - C. Aubry Smith A story of romance, mystery and intrigue Next Thursday, Friday, Saturday 'GeneAutry Smiley Burnette "PUBLIC CQWBOY"NO. 1" with Ann Rutherford ;Gene Autry scores another bit 1. Coming—Errol Flynn, Olivia De Hedlund "THE ADVENTURES OF ROBINHQOD" JustJust 2z1 Srniie or Two , Mistress: "Good gracioils, what's all this mess in the oven?" Maid: "I dropped the candles :he'water, ma'am, so I put them :he oven to dry." , • Hiram walked four miles rills to call on the girl of his ?or a long time they sat silent by the side of her- log ut after a while Hiram sidled o her. "Mary," he began, "I've got :learin' over thar, an' a team ea, and some•'lrawgs and cows, :al-laate on buildin' a house Here he was interrupted by mother, who had awakened. "Mary," she. called in'a, loud is that young man thar yit?" Back came the. answer: "No, ut he's gittin' thar." o Jasper: "How did George break g?" Casper: "Do you see those ver there?" Jasper: "Yes." Casper: "Well, George did•n'tX • "Admit, my dear boy, that ne thing to have a lovely woman our arms." - ":`es, the trouble is that one p by having her on one's hands!" • "If we get any more kinds s on which we have to keep records," ighed the druggist, "I'm going ave to keep my record books he shelves. and put my stock handise in •the safe!" • Sick Man (as the nurse let p for the first time) : "Gee! ouldn't let them operate Bain for a million dollars!" Doctor (coming along just if /.1 ., mnr•rin,i lnnlr .his Annie; in into over the dreams. on a cabin, closer a good an' wag - .an' I . an'---" Mary's i voice, Ma, his i steps f s r it's a in ends t f i of tar- o e to en b of mer- s b o him sit h I b on me k then f fsno)• a :-1 s t 2r ti0 a w "I'm sorry, but I shall you again." Sick Meta (letting out a roar)— `Nothing doing! I won't stand for it! I won't stand for it! Absolutely not!" Doctor (arguin) ; "But, it's some- thing that just has to be done. You ree, a. terrible mistake was made. When I sewed you up I left one of my rubber gloves inside you." Sick Man: "Is that why you want to open me again?" Doctor: "Yes." Sick Man (smiling) : "Don't be sil- ly! Here's a quarter; go out and get yourself another rubber glove." have to open • Third Class Caddy,: One who can go nine holes without losing a ball. Second Class Caddy: One who can go eighteen holes without losing a ball. First Class Cady: One who can go nine holes and find a ball. • Two women were gossiping about another friend who had been taking beauty treatments. First: ' 'by, you know, my dear, 1 understan that her beauty doctor n job in makingher •did an exceA t J look younger! ' Second'' (snapping) : "Yes. Shea almost able to travel half -fare now." • Dentist: "Open aider, please—wid- er." , Patient: "A -A -A -ah!" Dentist (inserting rubber gag, tow- el and sponge): "How's your fam- :aly?" • "Foe under -eye puffiness," advises a beauty .hinter, "use a powder under your eyes and add a tiny tinge of rouge there." Or, suggests our wise ''friend, try going to bed for a change. • McDonald: "So you love spinach?" MacPherson: "Yes,, it's my middle xrame." McDonald: "Really?" MacPherson: "Yes, Thomas Sandy 71acPhersen," • "I have nothing but praise for the new vicar," said a member of the congregation to the verger 'after the morning service." /• "So I observed'when the plate was taken around!" said the verger. • ' Jeannie: "Why 'don't you eat your apple; Sandy?" Sandy: "I'm waiting for Jock Smith, to come along. Apples 'taste much better if ther's another, bob looking, on!" - FREE SERVICE' OLD, DISABLED OR, DEAD HORSE -S;; OR CATTLE removed prt niptly and efficiently. S"imrI photic "COLLECT" fo. WILLIAM' STONE ,{SONS LIMITED• PHONE 21 • , INGERSOLL , PI4ON 219 ' MITCHELL ......m Yom. (Cautions$, from The 4ane.�;ica On • thhe 'morning of December 6th' ,1917, life do the seaport of J-alifas, Nova St!rotia, went ea serenely for '17 minutes after ar• fiic�ker of blue fiates. flrat appeared , aboarr1 the munitions!. ship Mont Blanc.. It was nine o'-clpek, and work had begun In offices-, warehouses and fac- tories, all burdened with the rich bus- iness of war. Out in the Narrows, freighters were 'being warped into piers, 'cruisers and 'transports swung at anchor, seamen toiled over cargoes of war materials. Suddleuly, amid! the ,,,.. confusion of shipping, a lifeboat appeared, manned by French sailors • rowing furiously. for the northern- shore. A second boat followed, also filled with men, all glanning backward in desperation at that thin blue flame on the Mont Blanc. When the first -boat Struck the beach the sailors flung themselves ashore in terror, gibbering French curses and prayers and shrieking: "Pou-dal; Pou-dar!" • As the sailors fled up the streets their warning ran garbled from mouth to mouth. Some people legged after the seamen; others hastened to the water's edge to fiuestlon the men leap ng'from tbe second boat. "She's afire!" blurted a Canadian in the boat. "The Mont Blanc. The Imo collided with her. Munitions aboard!" He raced away. Meanwhile H.M.S. Highflyer, a Bri- tish cruiser anchered near -by, - had put a (boat. overs'ide:'" As the flame waned, 'sprang . up again, this boat swung smartly alongside the Mont Blanc. Watchers on shore saw offi- cers and men clamber to ' the deck and run toward the fire. The 17 minutes were up." A shaft of yellow light, no thicker than. the Mont Blanc's masts, streaked upward from her deck, piercing the sunny' air for a mile. For an instant it whirled ike a waterspout. Then its top spread, and the whole pillar of fire mushroomed into an enormous purple cloud. Four thousand tons of TNT had ex- ploded�--the greatest detonation ever heard on earth. The Mont Blanc van - shed: A fragment of her ancihor, N. half' a ton, flew .three mile A sheets of flame.' Plates ripped rom her hull fell in a hissing rain on hips and houses. An 'immense tors ent, white and boiling, towered up- ward where the ship had been. Gulls high above the steaming maelstrom burst into gobs of flesh and feathers. Death then advanced, roaring over he water. Ships leaped upward, tore ree from their moorings, fell off craz- y before the tidal wave. Eight sail- rs were spattered againgt a cruis- r's turret. The captain of the Imq and 30 of his crew were squashed ori er deck by the force of the concus- ion- • Only those sailors, who were elow decks escaped the great globe f fiery gas which sped landward. A riga rock, ripped from the 'harbor' ottom, hurtled through the air and 'lied' 64 workmen on a pier. On the southern shore of the Hall - ax Narrows the community of Rich- mond lies in a trough formed by the hills. Through this trough the im- r,-'ense pressure swept. Two hundred school:°cb.ildren had time only to half rise from their desks before the walls fell upon them. Three lived. The orshippers in St. Joseph's Church, looking upward in, supplication, died that way. Factories and entire streets of houses trembled) and' col- lapsed; trees leaped from the earth and went flying like leaves. People were lifted high into the air, carried far, then dashed to death against walls and telegraph poles. Fires, started in a thousand places, inet and formed one great consuming blaze, from which spread the nauseat- ing odor of burning human flesh. Out of this inferno, running and stumb- ling, came the blind and the maimed, the dogs and cats, horses galloping in frenzy. The afterblast of the explosion rush- ed onward into the city of Halifax it- self and broke windows, toppled walls and spread showers of glass, Every- one who was able rushed to the streets. They saw the flames and the smoke, and heard the shrieks of the dying. A cry went up that a German fleet a^as bombarding the city. This was followed by reports of an air raid, and many people swore they saw planes in the sky. Panic-stricken people ran to the open country. Five thousand crowded onto Halifax Com- mon. Then came the invasion from the harbor front. Preceded by cries of torment, a mad horde stumbled and, crawled and groped toward the streets of the main city. Blood dripped from their faces. Some ran with stumps of wrists held before thein. Children lacerated and bloody, led blinded par- ents. One woman carried the head- less body of her baby. Scores fell and died. The cessation of the explosions brought Halifax back to sanity. Cour- iers were sent over highways and railroads to tell the outside world what had thappened. Part of the world already •guessed. People at breakfast on Prince Edward Island, 125 miles away, had seen their plates dance. Ships far at seat had heard the ex- plosion. Rescue work got under way while firemen, aided by volunteers, started the long task of extinguishing the fires. The dead were laid on the pavements, their bodies piled like cordwood. As wagons rolled out of the fire -and smoke, piled with the half -naked bodies of girls from fac- tories, 'ehdldren from schools, and sail- ors tossed up from tbe harbor on the tremepdolis tidal wave which follow- ed the blast, the death list mounted to 2;000. The injured totalled 20,000. Five - hundred persons were never fofind, having vanished'} from the face of the earth. Night came over a city lighted only by torches and** lanterns. Surgeons operated by the glimmer of oil lamps. All night long the wagons of the dead rolled out of the smoke and stopped at the schools and other buildings us- ed for morgues. And then a new hole rot' arrived. A storm blew down otter the stricken city, the wore't btfk'21ixd in. its history. Icy winds benumbed the rescuers. Pneumonia hastened the deaths of the IOW. , )3y this untie ithp ootalide'world hod begun -an a traordiee4r eifooi't 'to ae- sist. ,Special train' e1arted fgoan New Mit with 'medica eneelles, toed : and doctors, , All the New iilogland States sent similar contributions. A chip was loaded at ' Boeten and the 'throng of contributors: was so ,great that po- lice reserves were called to keep or- der. The Canadian Govern -went sent supplies and workers. But the res al- eirs came only in time to open vast burial plots. What was the origin of the Mout Blanc explosion? This is the gener- ally accepted version: As the Bont' Blanc, arriving from New York, entered the Narrows that morning, the Ifno, a Norwegian grain ship, was proceeding down the Nar- rows. There were many other ships moving in the channel, and in a con- fusion of signals the Imo headed di- rectly for. the munitions ship. When the two collided the Imo's prow cut. into the Mont Blanc and overturned a drum of benzol up forward. Some persons maintained ,that the clash of steel•••bltrew out sparks; others insist the Frenchmen had a fire going in the forecastle. In any ev4i t, the fa- tal flame appeared. The litigation following,t a disaster was carried to the highest tribunal in the Empire, the Privy Council, wihich fouud bot); ships equally at fault. A few licensed men were suspended; a few officials lost their posts, -Then the books were closed. But the officers and men of the Highflyer offer an example of bravery that will long' be remembered in naval history. They saw what had happen= ed. They knew what Was in the Mont Blanc's h -old. Yet three officers and 20 seamen boarded her to quench the flames. No one ever knew how close they came to winning. They were dissolved in that globe of fiery gas. Bergen's Brazen Blockhead (Condensed from the New York Times Magazine" in Reader's Digest) Within a year after that impertinent blockhead, Charlie McCarthy, had been "discovered—by-Noel Coward at an Elsa Maxwell party, he and his master had won a following of mil- lions; the dummy's' wisecracks were quoted everywhere, and, in addition to his fat radio contract, he had been signed at' $12,000 a week for a Gold- wyn picture. He even won some write-in .votes for Mayor of New York in the election last fall. Charlie has revived world wide in- terest in • ventriloquism. Forgotten practitioners of the art now win ap plause in metropolitan night clubs; countless amateurs have started on parlor careers; correspondence schools are digging ventriloquism courses out of dead stock;, dummy -makers are back at their work benches, and man- ufacturers are turning out thousands of Charlie McCarthy dolls for chil- dren. The appeal of the talking dummy is universal, because people delight in seeing and hearing themselves imitat- ed by something inanimate. The ven- triloquist's dummy can get off im- pertinences no human actor would dare utter, can prick pomposity, jab at falsignity with . reckless thrusts that we may think of but are too repressed to utter. Few current generation youngsters know anything 'about ventriloquism because the art vanished with the de- cline of vaudeville, , Yet talking dum- mies pop up in" the earliest pages of history. Thousands of years ago they were used by Chinese priests who would hold them against their stom- achs and ask them questions, where- upon the dummies would answer in deep sepulchral tones. The great oracles of Greece, histor- ians suspect, went in for the same sort of ventriloquistic flummoxing of a gullible public. So did the high priests of the Pharaohs. The Louvre has a statuette of Anubis, the Egyp- tian god, built along McCarthy lines, movable Jaw and all. Almost anyone can learn "near" ventriloquism (where a dummy is used), the degree of success depend- ing on one's vocal equipment. The il- lusion of throwing the voice is cre- ated by acting and by changing nor- mal speech, keeping it within the glottis. That vocal diltortion, known in the trade as "the grunt," is one of the things that make audiences laugh; it is the voice of Punch, and children and adults all over the world have been rolled in the aisles by it for centuries: - For distant 'work—where the voice seems actually to come from some re- mote spot—much more practice is re- quired. The basic sound f 5r that is called the "drone." The farther the drone -is forced back in the throat, the more distant it seems. Radio is easier on the ventriloquist than stage work. When playing to a, visible audience, he must restrict his vocabularly. He can't, for example, keep his lips still with a line like: "Peter Piper picked a peck of picky peppers"; he avoids b's and p's s much as he can. Charlie McCarthy is famous be- cause his master, a keen wit who graduated from Northwestern Uni- versity, had the foresight to subord- inate his own personality to tbe blockhead's. That was sound psychol- ogy and perfect press-agentry. Even la rehearsals Edgar Bergen maintains the pretense that his red -thatched dummy is an individual. Before Char- lie is taken out of his valise, studio hands can hear him screaming pro- fanely for release. At ope rehearsal Bergen- called' for the script (he usually works without one—ad Jibe a lot). The page boy hurried over, Bergen looked at the 'lines and prepared to go on. Before the boy got to the door, Charlie Mc- Carthy called after him sharply, "Bring that thing back! I want to see it myself." Withouta second y oo d thought, the lad hurried back; blush ed as Bergen waved him away. Char lie chuckled. When W. C. Fields signed the con tract for his radio appearance with Bergen, Charlie was looking- on. The comedian; hat' tilted -over his glowing nose, was chewing a sea -den teeth - MEN'S Simmer Suits - Up to $19.50 Tropical Worsteds, Palm Beaches, Tweeds .and Flannels. Single - or n C double •breasted. - Fancy or plain 7 backs. 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Fields was so startled that he almost swallowe'l rhe toothpick. Whenever Bergen gets a telegram at the studio, Charlie will try to hors :n. on it. "Let's have a look, Bergen," he'll :ay; ''that may be for me." He always treat.r Bergen as something less then Pu equal, and Bergen en• courages the idea. Beri;en accidentally discovered his gift. for ventriloquism while talking with schoolmates one day. Something he said seemed to have come from far down the hall. Even Bergen was ilabbergasted, but it gave him an idea end he sent off for a correspondence school book on ventriloquism. Like ;:lost professionals, he is self taught. He made Charlie's body himself. The ahead was made by a doll carver from Pergen's charcoal cartoon of a Chica- go newsbody he knew. . Charlie McCarthy may attain im- mor tality for his sheer impudence. He has the vital spark other dummies leek. No matter to whom he is talk- ing, he never pulls his punches. He is a bad egg—a little vulgarian, a brassy, blustering, cheeky blockhead --but we wouldn't harm a splinter in his hollow head. Weighed ---and Found Wanting (By Robert Littell in Reader's Digest) Whisking a pair of chickens off the scales, the butcher announced cheer- fully, "Two dollars and twenty cents." Mrs. Powers' casual manner suddenly changed. "Just a minute, butcher; put those chickens back on the schles. I'm an inspector." When the needle came to rest again, she turned iaeaor- ably on the- butcher, "You charged me for six ounces more than the scales say." "I goes; I was careless," he replied apologet Bally. But put came Mrs. Powers' summons book. Af- ter a brief wrangle'•'the butcher was ordered to explain before the Com- missioner why he had tried to cheat. her out of 18 cents. For two day's, as part of en investi- gatiozi into the short -weight swindle, I watched Mrs. Powers exercise her duties as Inspector of Weights and Measures for tilt City of New York. Apparently' bona fide customers, we stopped curbside peddlers, we visited meat,'delicatessien aid grocery Stores all over town- • In the shims, where the cheating was most frequent, but it was a Park Avenue butcher who asked, in a low voice, if we couldn't "square this up-" About two out of every three stores visited' yielded some evidence of short weight. We found discrepancies in mushrooms, poultry, vegetables; ;n bags of sugar and potatoes which the grocer had weighed and stuck under the counter in anticipation of a rush. We saw scales skillfully .barred from the customer's view by piles of pro- duce; old-fashioned spring scales with the needle an ounce ahead of zero ; expensive modern computing scales which a storekeeper of less than av- erage height could not help but read to his own advantage. When a merchant was caught giv- ing short weight the usual alibi was, "I guess I made a mistake." True, the errors were small; in any one case it might have been a mistake. But the mistakes were almost always in the mere ants' favor. This sort of ' m•istake,", according to the alae' Department of Weights and Measures. takes about ten cents a day frons every housewife in New York. Which means• over half a mil- lion dollars a week i,e pockets of the short -weight crooks. What of the rest of the country, which is on the whole less strictly policed than New York? According to government esti- mates, each American housewife is overcharged on the average as high as $54 a year by short -weight crooks. In Pennsylvania, inspectors weighed 499,754 packages, and found 81,098 short. Shopping in 1.691 stores. Fed- eral Trade Commission investigators found 44.9 per cent. of the purchases under weight. In Texas, a creamery made $70 a day excess profits on but- ter, a bakery $355 a week on bread. In San Antonio, three-quarters of the city's large scales were condenned,, In an ea.'stern grocery store, all the pre - weighed packages were under par. Ranging over the map, one find's •10 - pound bushels of potatoes which should have been 60, "five -gallon" milk cans containing three gallons, nine andone-half pound turkeys weighing eight, and pounds of cheese weighing 13 ounces. Departments of Weights and Mea- sures can tell curiou's st.oriee about the methods used by the shoraweight racketeers. During the Christmas rush Mrs. Powers seized .a turkey in- to which a butcher had inserted three lead sinkers. Total weight of leads stuffing: one pound, ten ounces. Pro- fits are increased by strings tied to counter scales, by tile' weight of sans' ages glued underneath platform, by putting a 25 -pound face en a 20 pound scale, by placing scales near the help - panelist fneant'most to housetvives,1 ful pressure of an electric faun. Some 1 butchers cover the scales' platform with a wet rag or with several lay- ers of heavy paper, or skillfully add weight with their thumbs. Moat fre- quently of all, the needle starts about three-quarters of an ounce ahead of the customer—and wins. Even the finest computing scales can be "rigged," but even if they aren't, the • customer, impressed by their splendor, doesn't notice how the merchant announces a price before the indicator comes to rest, or stands to one side for a more profitable read- ing. Aside from the few deliberately dishonest merchants, there are others who would not admit, even in their own souls, that they are cheating. The store is crowded, the type on the computing scale is fine, the margin of profit is narrow, and they give themselves the benefit of the doubt. Such doubts, multiplied by thousands of hurried, careless storekeepers, are taking millions, annually from Ameri- can housewives. State Weight and Measure officials report that short weight or measure is most frequent in retail foods (es- pecially meat), and in coal and gaso- line. An official of a large chain told government investigators: "It is very easy to overcharge a few cents in weighing meat. This is not a case of fundamental dishonesty, but the tra- dition in the meat business every- where has been to take advantage of any discrepancies in favor of the meat man. It is done all the time." How can such "traditions" be de- striyed? 'Who is to blame? Not the better scale companies: their ma- chines, when properly serviced, are above reproach. And not always the merchant, whose mistakes are often the result of ignorance or careless - nese rather than dishonesty. (The butchers' trade papers have been con- ducting a campaign for aecarate weight). As usual, it comes down to the public, which ought to be more interested in its own protection anti demand stricter enforcement of steiet er laws_ The public, fortunately, is bents awakened. Consumers National Fed- eration has issued a warning leaflet on shirt weight to all its;rmenibere_ In New York, the Y-W.C-A `is coop- erating with the Weights and Mea- sures Department in test shopping, and is telling its embers how to guard against being cheated. The De- Ilartment of Agricultilre is sending out reports, and the Bureau of Stand- ards is eager to educate the conatnn- er. In the last six months, newspaa per space devoted to short weight has noticeably increased. To this wave of interest .officials are respond- ing. The Texas state division of Weights and Measures recently cos - ducted new training courses for its Inspectors. In Richmdnd, the city de- partment offered prizes in a campaigns to educate store clerks. For your own protection, you should improve your buying habits. If you order by telephone, check the buteiter with scales of your own—scales not too cheap to be accurate. In the store, buy in definite weights of quan- tities, and verify the amounts reeefir- ed. Watch the scales. See that thew start from zero, look for the hespec- , tor's seal, read the total for yourself, do your own arithmetic, don't be afraid to ask questions. And if yon suspect anythiinig to be wrong, pro- test, and complain to your bureau or weights and measures. It deserves your co-operation and support. A community where customers don't do these things bas only itself to blame if lead sinkers are weighed along with the turkeys.