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HomeMy WebLinkAboutThe Huron Expositor, 1872-01-26, Page 22. THE TWO TROMBONES, • Mr.- Whiffles—the respected par- ent of ,. our hero, Mr. . Adolphus Whiffles—was ad. tea ulen t Berkshire , farmer, who, before.i•etiring from ' his :business and leaving it to his . .. son, fancied that a visit to the great • I metropoliswould have the effect of sharpening the .wits of that amiable youth, an. operation:of Which that' young gentleman;stood .greatly, in need. The t son_ Jumped at - the idea, especially when !relearned he h• e with to set - forth on his travels alone. With the pat enta.1 blessing, and his purse well filleaeMr. Whit : Res, juniote duly arrived: in London _. and installed himself in economical quarters in Savoy Street, Strand. • The theatres,' of course', occupied a large share pf Mr[Whifflea -kitten-. i ' tient; during his stay 'n London, and the neighborhood of the Stage -doors 'afforded him a vast amount of satisj- faction. The sight of "professiOn- als'in their every day oostume was -10-him. a source of great gratification, and his:delight when, he made the acquaintance of a prominent manatee of the orchestra of the Royal Dash Theatre exceeded all 'hounds. Ile i vowed eternal frien.:s'aip forhim on the spot, and there and then ratified the agreement by eutertaiuing his 'new aoquaintance at a recherche sup- per at the Mbion. Our story -opens , when Mr. Whiffles and hi compan- ion—Mr.' O'Leary by name. -had _beed almost inseparable for the space of six 'weeks. ; With pain Mr. Whiffles had lately.observed an expression of seteled melancholy up- on Mr.- O'Leary's expressive counte- nance, and had resolutely determin-. ed to dilvine the cause. "You are ill T' said .:olyahero one. evening, after they 1ad- supped at the hostelry . above . ila ntioned, and were quaffing various ." ,,vhiskeis hot" to promote digestion. :Mr. O'Leary sighed, -81K0k his head sadly and emptied his glass b,,• way of a reply. " Yoiir supper has dsagreed with yQu ; you have eaten too mulch " • . i continued Mr. Whiffle, tenderly*. .' : 4 "It isn't the supper ' thet worries - me," observed his Cull) pal:lien. ; . the sabatitute." ' _ This mvsteriou4 answer -puzzled' --.,- Mr. Wil:4eS. He thought it'over -kseriously, -then gave . it up ie des- pair, and demanded an explatiationa Mr. O'Leary" tagdrously -puffed at his eigare and proceeded to enlighten 1ro Whiffles: It appeared, from Mr. O'Riely'S siCcoent, that. it was customary in the Royal. Dash Theatre for the management to allow various mein,. , bets of :the orchestra' tolibsent- them- • aetves; from time to tirderfrom their posts, in order to atten4 concerts or other entertainments; oil- the condi- tiOn that they provided ilieient sub- - . stitutes to fulfil their rdinary .du- ties. .A3 a rule, thesd substitutes • werenot hard to find; out Mr. 0'-, Leary .confessed, witLytears in his eyes, that although he 1 ad searched high and lol,v, for sortie1 unaccount- able, reason he could pnd no onta. able or willing to supply his place at the theatre, -while,he was absent' to fulfil a -most profitable *engage - meat. he had accepted to play at a • fashionable West End concert, the ensuitti evening. Without •a Mg - mattes hesitation. Mr. Whiffles threw himselLinto the breach told proff61, 1 ed his services. : g . "Stuff!" repligd O',Lea. ry, rudely,: " what do you know• atitit music ?"- Mr. *Whiffles coulda' tell. .He was quite certain al?out what he didat't know, Gut that h.e refrained from teetrtionine. There was,a pain- ful pause; Mr.- . O'Lea •y- meked uo w and glance , up- as if he at seheme of his own si.lently on frr some ticia then darting a searching ton the face of Mx. Whi were revolving some gl' in tae ifin,rtnost recesses • mind; but as .vet scarcely saw the manner in which it eould be carried out.. Stia1den1 " I have -it. Thanks, Wniffies, my boy. I accept your generous of- fer. You shag he my substitute/' • said Mr. O'Leary. - To say that Mr: Whi es as de, *lighted, would bet fe.eb y express the state of his Mind. e grasped Mr. O'Leary's hand andl hook' it fervently., He trembled sah'eady with excitement.' His peeedest- .. hopes were about to be reAlized: He would be admitted:behindtthe scenes • of a the.atre.s Words failed to. con- vey any isea of his feelings-, as he lent a ear to -Mr. O'Leary,: who proceeded to give him the nec- essary iestruct ions In the first place, Mr.,O'Lealy pointed ,out, there were two tient- bone•plyers in the eorchestea . 'of the Royal Dash Theatre, he hiniself being one, and that for the especiel guidarice of Mr: Whiffles he would summarily state the casetaa follows, premising that after the rising ofilthe Curtain on the first piece a perfdiens ance upon the two trombones her- ' aided the approach of the villain, of -the piece. Further, his (Mr. O'Leary's) ex- perience induced him to believe that in a crowded assembly onetrombone would probably make lig! much -noise as two; and 'that all Mr -Whiffles • 11 e had to do, after announcing himself as Mr. , O'Leary's substitute, would . be to take his seat leisurely in the orehestra, and, when the curtain rose;carefully watch the proceedings of t e other trombone -play r and imit te his every moveme t; so . that in reality, one trombone would mak all the noiee, although. ppar- ently two were being .played. Last- ly, h advised Mr. Whiffles to be- caref 11 andmind what he was bout,. ai th leader was a ----a: !" So n .after the friends le t the .A.lbi n and proceeded on the i • aeta eral ays ; his friend and Co ipan- ion a ready more than half r pent- , , , ._ iug his rashness in embarking- n the -ande Th som ire shades 'of tw light itaking were enwrapping, as with a shroud, the st eets of London, When, ing /1 r :O'Learv's trombone- i hand,,iir. 'Whiffles might hay 6bserted wofully picking his through the purlieus of Drury endeavoring to find the stage ane bf the Royal Dash Th arry- his been way Lune ner- atre. TWO, or hree sallo‘V-faced gen- tl. man Nver6 Sm king, short pipes in.fr nt of the en tr nee, and eccaaionally a lady •Or ge t eman Passed h u cried 1 in, evide tl uoder the impreesion that they . erte4.behind their tune, ut a ghince at the clock iti the hal ap- peare o reassure them, as hey made h ir Way more leisure1 to- wards t eir respective dres ing- rooms. 'Upon reference to his watch, Mi. Whiffles found tha the -doom rad only -just been opened, and he therefore- had some leisn •e to look al out hiM. tille loitered a the door for some time, wonderine as the vakio us members of the core' any made 'their appearance,- who this was, a d who that could possibl be, : . , until.a mall; but uncommonly sharp, boy PI cked.hini by the slee% e, And .said "-Y a better : make haste ; they'rea goin to ring in." Mr. Whiffles then became a are that he w is almost alone., Wit out - having th :faintest , idea of the m an ing of "r nging in, he mechan cal- l), followedi the small boy do n a gloomy pass -age, tumbled down a ew :steps, picked himSelf up and fo.trid himself upon the stage. He lad hardly timo. to ca.st -a, hurried glance upon the .novel, not to say dret ry, . objets by Which be wag surrounded, when an elderly individual in a white beard, and whose shirt-fr nt seemed Ito lie plentifully besprinkled with star .heo•koned the boy. "Tom," said he, "go into - he music -room, and ask- Air, Love oy for my copy of ".Old Kin°. Cole? The boy at once complied. Rig t- ly conjeet ring that the music-ro m was the pi ce wherein the =skit las assembled previous to making th ir . appearanc in the orchestra, r. Whiffles followed the boy adow a score or so of ricketty stairs, to he great. detri nent of his Shins, int a 'Scatitily ft rnished apartment, ,iu_ ated immediately t eneath the stage, wherein jae found beveral gentlemen composedly tuning their instrumen s. Upon hearing Mr. Lovejoy, tie • leader, addressed by name, r. Whiffles nervously introduced hi self as Mr. O'Leary's stibstitute. . "Very 'good," said Mr. Lovejo .he's told you everything, I sup- pose !" 1 Mr. Whiffles bOwed. assenting and .dareda piercing glande into every cdriter of 'th.e apartment in search of the -other trombone. Hor- ror! 14 wasn't there! The mu upon. whOtu he solely depended a - sent ! What was to be done? 'Re- treat was out of the question ; k s, while ho was contemplating flight, a 'small bell sounded,and the musi i- Ans proceeded to take their plac s in the brchestra. Mr; Whiffle still bearing rhe fatal trombone, db 1 fdllowed, and, ere long, self in the piesenee of tl,e blic. The. novelty of his pairingly • found hin _British •pt situation so confused him that hie for a mo tent seated himself in the chair .ly raging to Mr. LoVejoy, an l Niq,t3 received with a prodigious ou burst 'of ' enthusiailn, the audiene shim- to be the talentel nself: This mistake wa ied by the appearance of ole ertder, who muttere something undey his breath by n means complimentary to our ler and motioneda him angrily to th aeat occupied by Mr. O'Leary, Th audience perceiving the mistak , .) ,eapressed their Opinion of ' MI 1 'W-1) iffltes ie. candid and unrnistakabl , rins, as Ihe TutAillylmade his wa 1 tO the sp t indioated' by the irat conducior. After trying to reduc to sometling like Order the sheet. of music noon the sand before him "Mr. Whi es' repined -sufficien ceurage. to house was stipposteg leader hi soon recti the yenta - lhis next neigh -Portend • and ly, tba Pt' one, ha n't a "Couldn.'t t askedM. W hag in lis h Couldn't. 1 " Cer inlv "Wo ldnit well V' I quir n ighbo some s rpris tinued I "Do. ithou him !how can they? bon't.yoi kn w that you and- he beginth moment the curtain rises, to 'bring on old Russett, the:heavy Man '1 e co Idn't eoine on -with- Out his music, t ou know ; as he ap- pears at the hick at first, then crosses th Leo utains 'fitorne left to right, th n fro ) right to left, and, finally c melt own left upon the stage, wh re h expresses a va.riety,e of eruotio is in anternine, and kill to your MTh C. At the e wor 18 Mr. Whiffles re, signed all hope ad was mentally ealcalatin the ariters to which he would be expos;d if he leaped into the stalls, from thence into- the pit, and ..foug t hi way out of the theatre when ti e leader returned, eat onimo s fro n upon his brow, followed y a siort, fat, ,pale -faced gentleman api arentiy of foreign extraction wild allied a trombone under hi left arm. Joy! M. NV/Allies f It a man again: This, then, was riffle I Mr. Whiffles.re- membered the instructions, • and w/ttched t e ne -conaer attentively ; who, upon his p rt, appeared to re- gard him ith t e turnost concern. Mr. Whit es ha occasion to shift hit trornbo.e; uffler did likewise. Mr. Whi es fel for his handker- Chief ; Mr. Pufflr followed. his ex- ample. 11 this seemed very IDVS- terious, an Mr. Whiffles was lest in wonderi ent vhen the overture commence s. Luckly, the tromboees were not want d until the come rnncemSn.s of th drama. The over- ture ceased Now, look o it," observed. Mr. Whiffles' n ighb r ; "it's you novv."' Mr. NtVli flies ti echanically raised the instant ent t his tips, keeping a steadfast g ze t e while upon the proeeeding of Mr. Pufflea. who _did his bes to s are Mr. Wlifiles out of CQ11 tenat ce. Mr. Lo'vejoy loo)ced rou d, an seeing the .trour- boxies perfe tly r ady, awaited the risnag of t e curtain,: It was an agdnizing mome t. The silence was positiv ly nful. One might haVe heard a pin drop. The small bell was h aid gain. -Ur. Love- joy tapped is de k, seed the curtain. slowly rose° in s leam siIence! Mr. Lovejoy be anbb ating alowly, rind had even acannpl shed a few strokes before he r alize the fact. Turn- ing round . asc rtain the meaning oi his ext ordin ry circumstance, his surprise. and owilderment may wel be irna tined it perceiving the twol tromboi e-pla ers hard at work, distlending t eir heeks to their ut- most capaci nervously nianipulat- ing their in truin uts,•and produc- ing not a ound ! And the most una countab e g was, they never too their e es off one another. Mr. Lov Joy was trans aed with amaze- niei t. • "This is- very trange," thought Mr. Whiffl s. " wonder when that felldw goin to begin !" The little bell inkled again and again; Mr. Russet stopped ui,on the stage wi h some amount oi nity and lef 'it without any, under the mpressi n that he was a trifle too. SOOD. "he stage -manager, a gt3llt o excitt We temperament a,nd uch a dicte to the use of pass °nate languag , who played one of tl e princi al pal ts in the piece, rush -td from tis ro in, discharged on Ithe spot an ino ensive "super" who, unfort Matel happened to cross his pat ; welt, half a dozen step at a tam dow a score or so of rick tty .stai a the imminent haza d of br akin his neck, and the little door under led i to the orcliesrtra, UM S ed terms ery ad word -=-Mr. t by s ch conduct, and essive y -rude observa- 't go on ? Mr. Love- tounded to reply. He C, it siient worder, ninon s. There they yin g, vigarousty, E HURON EiPOSITOR. or what this might was informed, in re- er, the other trom. yet put in an appear - ley do without him ?" iffles—devoutly hop - art of hearts they was the reply. the • big dram do as d Mr. Whiffles. • regarded him with and cou- ,appei ring at the s age tha dem nded what the— Love'oy mea why he—ex tioq he did joy as too a mold only p to th two tr 8at,'p but unana nearl unable to co ing .04 before ly. a and fina n Mr. Lo n s. He rushed t anting 41, • riling and blo vith no result. .iThe stage - gel est cubit -cc' violently, _and had fit. , 'rho audlence, prehe Id what was go - heir eyes, hiSsed.loud- ly th curtain fell. ejoy ave vent CO bis leap d from his seat ward Mr. Whiffles, ith e look around him. „'The 4 The melted from &Or 'to Cella.' fedi I ing ; 'ever body was oa the tiptoe and of expecta ion, and sundry anxiou. who voices, apipertainina to ins atie his "gods" in etrii.-e up a anxiety. Again th Lovejoy ta batoil—lbo and--4stoop First, Fiddl the orchest p n nloredthe musicians ;to once, and appease their t • small bell 'tinkled. Mr. howe Ted his desk—raised hisi cond ed on each side of him, than d. He whispered the that then left his seat and a.bou a.. Mr. Whiffles asked rush haustion after unaccustomed exertions, was ,wi pin the perspii a tion . from his 4D face, onderin r what on earth was going o happe nex . No sooner, ✓ r, did h pert eive the angry u tor adv ncin towards hire, ith - intiu ive perception emething u pleasant was t o occur he made a precipitate hrough the Uttle door, and 1 JAN. 26 1872 sotight safety under , the stage, hotly pursued Mr. Lovejoy, who oppor- tunely came across he foreign gen- tleman quietly sneaking- away, and fill upon him tooth;and nail'. The foreign gentleman, being choleric, knocked Mr. LovejOy down, Mr. Lovejoy, being by n4 means defiei- c'eat of pluck, regained the perpen- iculale and—in the language of t e ritlg--•let, the foreign gentleman have it." That Odividual next seized the astoilished, Whiffles and e deavored to drag birn before Mr. ovejoy, in ceder that he might dergo condign punishment, -when iu ti e foreign gentleutaa slipped; they b th fell ; and the Iwo trombone - p avers rsysteriously disfippeared. They had fallen down an unused well under the stage,. Mr. Whiffles ride t most.' ,There being but little ater, they were soon extricated, d, fortunately, no bones were °Tkheell. two gentlemw—after her exciting interview with the go-manager—were, shortly after- rds, permitted to take their de- rture. lw a • Mr. O'Leary, next day, was duly ormed of the disaster. and lost his nation. The Sallie fate befel the • unfortunate Puffier, who, it a- p- e red upon inquiry, was really a oring under some severe indis- po itiou that threatened to confine 1 n . to his, bed; and being natur- t 11 unwilling to lose his salary, be rovicled a substitute, ' like Mr. iffles, utterly una.ble to play, and to horn be gave, in effect, instruc t o s alinost identical with those givien to our hero by Mr. O'Leary. ' Mr... Whiffles returned to the 1 - hoilise of bis ancestoraia sadder and a ‘'iii-er man. Ho has never been to theatre since, and never thinks vit. ' ' bout a shudder of his terrible a' enture connected ivith the two -to bones.—London Society. ..• • tim. 1 The Fair at No-Vgorod. • t ar and wide over the plain be- lch extended long linies of booths g i teringin the morning Bun, hmees, a wagons rattling .carelessly to 8. I fro, vast piles of merchandise , lyit g heaped on every: side, ;led a u titilltle NV1)0111 no man can num- b r picturesque in, every variety of d els kind feature, eddyipg unresist- i glysth rough the countless channels o the timber Archipelago—a spec- taiele a which Faithful, shakes his hea in sorrowful forboding, and C ir avian clutches with a firmer 1 gra p the good sword that vanquish - e Apollyon. From the .first gl pse of this great gathering one gets little except an overwhelming id a of its size and numberb ; for, in tr it a it is not BO much the influx of a large- body of strangers as the sp i ging up of a. new eity by sud- de Archantitient, in the very centre of t e old one. tn. and around this th r -rate provincial town there are ga:th red, during the six weeks of the great commercial iParlianient, n la co I) as ge in ite Ve an et m co nn ha he Ei U1 Ge th col wi ha 0 l' bar SUS tin. bla fro 1 h Mu pes pea 'eric ed Kir hail like as t ed t by s and all d Deli the beat stnrc of N eyed Alta: only sti•ik of2 th have torte extre sboul ti ear y half a million of men, or a ig r population than that of Mos- - • and a mighty aggregate of u n forces, from whatever cause, e toled, ha:always a kind of i n PUT collectively, Doi matter how.' s ,-, ificant may be the individual m ." Btit, as you purs re your.sur- y, the great assemblag developes oilier striking featur , viz., the tr ordinary' diversity of the .ele- , en s :which compose it; In. Mos w, in Kanzan, in Nejr4. itself, you ty. ny day see three ior four, or If a dozen different 'types ; - bu t re all the principal rubes of iro rean Asia are represlented again d again. There • are :the portly ri an, the bard -faced Dutchman, e apper Frencliman,i the° fresh, 01. d Swede, the lurnp:ish Czech, th n's 'cracked turieless1voice; the d ome, knavish, dark -eyed ever on the --look:out for a n, with all the ,:, unstudied gra e and intense . vitalit* of his in - do it ble .race betraying itself in eve1y line of Lis lit he, sinewy frame • the h ok-nosed Jew, with his sharp, _ pitons look .(taught hina by cen- ies of oppression) in -his keen ckleyes e the bluff Anglo Saxon, ill the roaring street s of the and the bee le-browecl se vite, flow the voiceless step - of the Volga. There,: to,), ap- r t le spare, igh-cheo;ked Am au; awl the own,, btillet-head- Ta ter; and the square,. shaggy gh z ; and the squat, yellow - ted Finn. There grins the gnome - B tc.tlikin,Ahirstite and untamable be:four footed ancestor asEascr,i b- 6 him by tradit.ion. There, side Id ., tower the statoly Bokhariut tie tall; wiry Obssack, gaunt ti -eless as the wolves of their ye deserts. The gipsy visage of a th faces the sleek, tiger -like i y of the Circassian ;- and the y..4„Ess1monian from the factories fir, jostles the yellow, narrow C nnese from the slopes of the. Mountains. And it is net ti e? vast variety :of rice which -s one, -but also the distant out 'ay regions from wbich they &we. One's -right hand e the dress of a manfrom the i east of Asia, one's left dr jostles a man from the ex - el treme west of Europe. The Whole fair is one vest geographical abridge- ment, in whieh the lour points of the compass join hands in bewilder- ing suddenness. The very world it- self Uppiars small and con fin'ed in the midst of this great Witenage- mot of the remote and the impos- sible. One feels as if dile had tra- versed the whole globe in a few seconds, like Mithomet in his voyage to the seventh • heaven and this feeling is enhanced bythe aspect which lies strewn on elJery side. — Dark, „blue. , ANA SPECIAL NOTICES, BR13191CFAST—EPPS'S COCO.A.—GRATEF171. AND CoMFORTING.—" By a thorough knowledge of the natural laws which govern the operations of digestion and trition' and by a careful application - of well selected -cocoa, Mr:- Epps has pro- vided our breakfast-tablea with a deli- cately flavored beverage which may gave us niany doctors' ,Service Gazette. —Made simply with boiling wa- ter or milk. Each packet is labelled -- JAMES EPPS & Co., Homoeopathic Chemists, London:" Also. makers of eEppe's Milky Cocoa (Cocoa and :Con- densed. Milk). OP The Osborn Lock Stitch Sewing Machine, made by the Guelph Sewing Machine Company, has no superior in' the market. DIE HORSE. —" Of the. great number of animals under the control of man, the horse Is unquestionably the most service- able ;" but is it not strange that so many who own horses, and who are dependent on their labor for allying, should neglect to give them that care and. attention which their own interest no less than the safeiy and comfort of the horse demands. The hest medicine for horses is Darley's .Condit,ion Powders and Arabian Heave Remedy; of this there carrbe no doubt —it is safe and easily given. Ii.inember the name, and see that the signatUre of Hurd. & Co. is • - on each pack- age. Northrop & Lyman, Newcastle, Ont, proprietors for Canada. sold by all medicine dealers. G G MARE • • • • GeorgenVcefebrated /fledicines are now for sale in most all of the stores of deal- ers in nilidieines. The attention of the public is called. to the fact that.over 120.- 000 packages have been .436.1d during the prst few years in a portion of the Pro- vince of Ontario alone, and more is re- quired; as the demand is steadily merea.s- ma. This of their curative powers is sallcient proof. They are waaranted to purify, regulate, and strengthen the whole human system ; not to cure any thief; und every th.ng, brit to be benefici- al iu moat all cases and hurtful in none. They consist of piis, powders, relievors, and ointments ,for the human system ; also liniments and powdeis fur horses, cattle and other animals. Sold. in Sea - forth by R. Lumsden and J. Scatter. M. GEWIGEN & SONS, Barrie, whole: sale manufacturers. 2166m. •Exhaustion and degeneration fol- low the excessive use of the senses, with- out due intervals of rest for repair. In order to maintain the wonted energy, the force'expanded, whether of body or mind, must be restored. When the expendi- ture of brain matter and other nervous elements is coutinued by overwork, the early extinction of life itself may be look- ed for as. the result of such degeneration. The ingredients composing Fellows' Com- pound Syrup • of Hypophosphites, are such alcontinue healthy blood, estab- lish sound nerves and senses, and will consequentiy not only prevent this ex- haustion,, but in most cases restore such as is lost. Forty years' experience have tested thevirtues of Dr. Wistar's Barsam of Cherry, and it is now generally ac- knowledged to be the best remedy ex- tant puhnonary and lung, disease, embracing the whole range from a slight cold to a settled consumption. Were it not .for its merits, it would long since have died, and made no sign: • isae Thei'e is, probably, no way in which we can benefit our readers more than by recommending te, them for gen- eral use Johnson's Anodyne .Liniment. -- it is adapted. to almost all the purposes of a family medicine; and as a specific for coughs, colds, whooping cough, sore- ness of the chest, lame stomach, • rheu- inatiske, spiting of blood, a.nd all lung -diffitailtiesi it has no' equal that ever we saw or heard of. etar- The propriety of giving condition medicine to horses, cattle and sheep. was discussed and admitted by many of the Agricultuf.rd. Societies throughout the State last Fall, and we believe that in every case but one they decided in .Tavor of Sheridan's Cavalry Condition 1.Powders. Good judgment. nryan's Wafes, (the great public re- medy,) have now been in use.over twenty years, hence it cannot be said that they are on trial.They have been thoroughly tried, and pronounced (on the authority of those whose Jives and health they have preserved) to be a cure, harmless and eminently salutary prepara- tion, and if, taken in season will invariab- ly cure colds, coughs, sore throat, and all bronchial affections. One fait' trial, will convince the most skeptical. field. by all medicine dealers, at 23ets. per box. ELECTRICITY. Thomas' Excelsior Eelectric Oil ! Worth Ten • 'Allies Its Weight in Gold. "Pain Cannot Stay where it is It is the cheapeat medietine ever reade. One dose tires common Kure throat. Om bottle has cured Bronchitis. Fifty cents' worth has cured an old SLautling Jouea. .It positively ein't13 Gat rtall L ma and Croup. ilty cents' worth bas cured Criuk. the leiela and the same quantity Leine liaek of eight years' etitielhar, 1r cures Swelled Neck', Tamore, Illeumatiena, Neurtilgia, Contrac- tion of 51 the useles, Stiff J Spinal Difficul- ties and Pain and Sorenese in any part, no matter where it ID 11,?' be, nor from what Cause it may arise, it always does you good. Twenty-tive cents' worth bits ctiret1 bad ee.ses of Chronic and Bloody D3ae cutely. One tea -spoonful cures Cliolie in fifteen minutes. It will .cure any ease of Piles that it ie possible to cure. Si ic or eight applications is war- ranted to care tiny cai-e of excoriated "..Tipples or In- flamed Break,. For Bruiees, if applied often, and bound up, there is never the elightest disco/oration to the Skin. It stops the pain of a burn as soon as applied. Cures frosteat feet, Boils, Warts and 'Corns, and Wounds Of even -description on man or Lead. Prepared by S. N. Thomas, Phelps, N. Y., and NOR'XIFLUOP & LYMAN, Newcastle, Ont., sole agent fax the Dominion. Nore..-Eclectric-Seleeted and Electrized. E. Hickson & Co. and R. Lurrthcien, Agent8 for Se 'forth. 208-216-4 The Great Female Remedy. JOB 110SE5' PXBIoDICAL PILLS. TIlIS invaluable medicine in unfailing in the -1- mite (4 all those painful and dangerous diseases to which the female censtitution is subject. It znOderatee all excees and remeies all obstructiolie and a speedy cure mar be relied on. --`1 To married ladion it is peculiarly suited. IA in a. short time, bring on the mo:thly period. eiritii regt1Thiaesriet3P-'ills abonlervd ()nun; and tus:::Y:ezet7ons, during the first three months of Pregnacy, aa thew are Sure to bring on 3fisoarriage, but at anyea4. tanIu° atilllecYarCH14:ffek pains in the back and limbo, fatigue ea ertion, palpitation of the heart, byaterics, whites, these pills will effect a cure 'when all other rnelrennendsy, hdoi4lneotfco4nnettlai1 anathalmownyerful, aniunthinclig theucittiofenistoluthtcheeeniltnittpubtrit. around tacit package., which ehould be carefelly preserved. .rob Noses, New York, Sole Proprietor. SlAtind 121 cents for postage, enclosed to Northop &L Newcastle., Ont. general egents for the Dominic; wili insure a bottle, containing over 50 plija.-11, reitunl Snmolidr.in Seafortkhy E. Mason it Co., -4•F • Ow Lumsden. WREN you are in Seaforthe just 'rue into Frank Paltridge's Photograph GaL. Iery, 'twil: do -Your heart good. "0.nly4i per dozen. Scott's Block, Seaforth. .4111•1111M1 RAILWAY TIME .TAE3LE: Trains leave the Seaforth station as follows :• — GOING WEST. Expzeue. Mixed. Mail. 2,37 P. ar.• 1.40 r. tr. &4p.& BAST. Express. Mixed. 10-50 A.. me 140i'. af. 8,00 A. memansesmermiummeememezemememeenimt Divisions 0ourts---1872- Division Courts will be held as follows : ...,Tan 16 Dungannon.. Anilevvjlle Jan 23 Bayfield.. April 3 Seaforth elan. 25 Goueneh Exeter ............Tan. 27 Winglia.m Dungannon. -An. Ainleyville -.May 21 Baytield... ,, . _Jan. 81 Seaforth .. Clinton .Feb. 1 Exeter May 25 Goderich Feb. 5 Clinton...-. ....May SI Wroxeter.......March 20 Dungannon........TuneS Seaforth Harch 28, Baylield— ......Tune 4 Exeter IdaAh 80 Goderich • Znne -6 Chilton April 1 - The Cants will open at 10 A. M. each day. mislatissinmeamemeare W. -11 OLIVER SIGN OP TTIZ SEA POP `1`i SCOT& COLLAR. A choice assortment of light and he.avy ha,tness, Whips, bells, liorseclothing, ete., kept constantly on hand, °pairing promptly attended to, Intl charges moderate. Rerneml)er the place! -. sign of the Scotch -Collar, Main Strtet, Selforth.. 163tf W. 11. OLIVER, 'CERTAIN PRESERVATION OF THE SIGHT.• . 's LAIAR1,1$, MoRgIsi:86.co.'s ;PERFECTED SPECTACLES AND EYE -GLASSES. The peculiar form .a„ni scientifia aceuretty attained by the ilia tal icom- plicate,c1 ana costly machinery, 'via- l -ante the -assertion that they are the most perfect Spectaeles ever manu- factured. They assist the vight most confer ease and comfort on the wearer, cause a continuous and abiding improvement of the eyes, and last a great reia.lay years without requiring to be clItanged. So they am tlie CHEAPEST as well 1153 the)JEST M. R. COUNTER. Agent, Main Street, Staforth. 212 Bon• us to the Farmers OF GREY AND MORRIS, PRIMRS, beware of persons, in the shape of peddlers and agents, perambulating the conntay, forcing a sale of inferior implements. t Ericouraec home manufactures, and yea will find a superior article at a reduced prite. The subscriber would respectfully return his sin- cere thanks to the farmers of Grey, 11-erlif3 and sur- rounding townships for their most liberal ps.tren- age iu the past, and would inform theni that Ile eNtiLl keep constantly on band, at the DINGLE FOUNDRY, Iron Plows, Wood Plows, Gang Plows, Cnitivatora, Land Rollers; Straw -Cutters, &c., . - Guaranteed of te- he -best qulity, and et pri▪ ces to defy competition. Re would eeecially call -eaten. tien to the "Farmers' Pio-," -which gives general satisfaction wherever introduced. Pots for ali the principal Plows kept con-, stantly on hand. I4ighest price paid for old out- ings. Repairing done promptly on Yoe' reasouable f,erins. NV. R. WILSOk 199 A inierville. '7 I "V • WM USED AND RECOM- ▪ MENDED BYTHE MOST EMINENT PHYSICIANS IN NEW ENGLAND FQR . THE LAST 45 YE.ARS. 'NOTHING BETTER) CUTLER RROS. b. CO., BOSTON. %SWF.. 50 cis acne 13bki by the Druggists r.24 EL tt, 0 ;04Z -k!4, • • LYMAN, ELLIOTT, & Co., Toronto,'Agents. FELLOW'S HYPOPH-OSPHITES. MONGST the diseases overcome, by the uee Of Fellows' Compound Syrup of Ilypophoaphires, • are Constipation, Asthma, Consumption, I:Alum:it- is, Nervous Debility, Dyspepria, Clime:- Bronchit- is, Chronic Dierrheeta, Melancholy. Debility result- , ing from Typhoid and other low fevers, Diphtheritic estration, IlYeteria, Ilypochendria, Amenorrhae, Chlorosia. Anaemia, Leuconthe a, Nervous Exeita- garaermis or Wasting of the Muscles, Apho- flirt, or Loss of Voice, Chorea or St. Vitus's Dance, Sluggishrieee of the Liver: Interrupted and Feeble Action of the Reetrt, Suffocating Feelines cauee: by mucone obstructions of the Lergs and Air 1':u sages leading thereto, and Debility from vn-'t causes, many cases of which appeared hopeless, leold by Apothcearies. Price. $L50; Six for $7.:',D JAMES I. FELLOWS, Chemist, St. John, N. B. MON iN THE BLOOD. Skik ty HU, Itt PERUVIAN SYRUP makes the wrisk strOrl aed exeLls 61 :ease by supplying the blood T.11.1 TITALI2ING easrtion.—Be Sare von get Peruvian Agyzyp• Panephleis free. J. P. DINSMORE. Prep:actor, Ni. '3 Dey St., Nev York. seid Dttaggista generally. Tenn State.s. --Nel spellwif a-8 clining in ---The said to be —Six: • own 8,40 —A la of Kossut —T ful r4vag —The growing Church. _ —Salt : • ed With 47` Iniiiit$. —1 n said to ave -half in lent ---A sal has conspi cooked her --Theti refused to , private peri 1 ---An k eently sent to -Queen V - --The ie mil -oft fifteen Mehl —The i because Vit to one imur —Tenny Beriiti - by tl -- lktra. Ints even B01-4011. —The P missed !Asti out of doom, wonderful everything - —Prot 1 , anti Mettle 13th -term ladies. recently * To'ava. The orated a V of a tempi Delwure SI Show at Wi ----t Six th it is estimat 15 miles o Wis., the 'p) — At a P Wilds Co., geese were e. rounds each Most bitt bitter cold ed good thi and pieteet' season.' - A for a 100 ye• Left for Mich ate didn't tag 22, — Eve news. threa austratsin. ' avian who 2.,,ou$ 4' C'Ook." — A - know." 4" that -old - *Jr Tha the -boy, app to poultry — A rniin for id -nail widMarry. piAci of trouble. _be freecoing Linnett I v.0 1:intg 4611* -- of - svi441e 1. go ready r (.1,,n't ak-nie, Arttt so man. iltett-tg ./011 • When ing for the t ebOlome - • upon •a. rich g. Is;r,yni want ttt this No netby ; 44 1 E — now day in -tLt avntlay of • casion to prse y 15114.' W.LS j1. 44:1V -ti 110' tla! e"i1at for <Ives., i'tmmt,lar 'WI it ill t.0 44zi1t at way," 1.'ixtra.ets UNPOPULAR Mit some 'for the rates 4" The watt