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HomeMy WebLinkAboutThe Huron Expositor, 1870-11-25, Page 2URON EXPOSITO The Barber of Dunse. A clergyman posees.singan uncommon, share of it and humor, had 'occasion to lodge for the night, in company with some friends, at the „inn of a towu, Which for eer- tain reasonswe shall denominate Dunse, Requiring the services of a barber, he was recommended by -tthe waiter to Walter' Drone, who was represented as excellent at cracking a joke, ot telling a story. This functionary being •forth,.vith introduced, made such a display of his oral and manual dexterity, as to leave on the mind, as well as the body of his cnstomer a Very favor- able impreSsion, and to induce the latter to invite him to sit down to a friendly glass. The mutual familiarity- which the circula- tion of the bottle prod -ced, served to show off the barber in his happiest moodand the facetious clergyman, antid the general h4. arity thus addressed hiM "Now, Wattie, engage to give you a guinea on the fol- lowing terms : that you leap backwards and forwards over your hair for the space of half an hour—leisurly, yet. regularly—cry- - ing out at every leap—' -Here goes I, Wat- tle Dron, barber of Dunse ; ' bu that, should you. utter anything else during the time, you forfeit the reward:" Niiattie, though no doubt surprised at the absurdity of the proposal; yet considering how easily he could earn the guinea, and the improba- bility that such an opportunity would ever again present itself, agreed to the -stipula- tions. The watch was set, and the barber stripped off his coat ; leaning with one hand on the back of ,the chair, he commeneed leapixtg over the 'seat, uniformly repeating .in, exulting tones, the words prescribed. Aftet n3atters bad gone on thus smoothly for five minutes, the elergyMan rang the • bell and thus accosted the waiter. "What tis the reason, sir, you insult me, by sending 'a. mad fellow like that, instead of a proper bather, aS you pretended he was !" Barber, - (leaping--" Here goes 1 Wattle Dron, barber of Dunse." Waiter—" Oh ! sit I • don't know what is the matter; I nev'ir saw him in this way in all my life, Mil. Dron ! Mr. Dron ! what do you mean, tr Barber—" Here goe3 I," &c. Waiter— " Bless me, Mr. Dron, recollect these are gentlemen, how can • you make'such a fool of yourself r Barber—" Here gots I," &c. La,ncllorch(ent•ering iu haste—" What in the name of wonder, sir, is all. this? The fel- low is mad' How dare you sir insult gen- tlemen in my house, by such conduct?" Barber—" Here goes I," Landlotd— "1 say, Bob, run for his wife, for this.can't be put up with. Gentlemen. the man is evidently deranged ; and I hope you will not let my house be inju-ted in any wayby dis business." Barber—" Heie goes I," okc. Wife (rushing in) —" 913. ! Wattie,- Wattie ! !what is this that's came owre ye? Do you no ken yer ain wite 7" (werping) "Oh! Wattle, if ye care rut for tile, mind ydar bairns at hame, and come awa' wi' me Barber -e-" Here goes T Wat—". The afflioted wife now clasped her husband round the neck, and hung on him, so effec- tually ast to avert his ' further progress. Much did poor Wattle struggle to shake off his loving, yet unwelccme spouse, but it. was "no go"—his galloping was at .n end: "Confound you for an idiot," he ibitterly exclaimed, "1 never could win a guinea as easily in my life." It was only necessary to add, that the explagation which immedi- ately followed, was much more satisfactory to "mine host" than to the barber's better half, and that the clergyman rested Wat- tie to his unusual good humor by gener- ously rewarding his exertions with the well- earned guiuea. Hurna,nity to Horses. As the cold weather u pprOaches the absoi lute cruelty of putting frosted metal intei the mouths of horses is so frequently brought te mind, that any suggestions as to a better course are at this season timely as well as merciful. No _one who has had to do with liOrses when the =mercury is considerably below the., freezing -point but has witnessed theftal- most frantic efforts to escape pain that . comes of putting on the bridle. Misunder- standing it many times, the coarse and bru- tal hostler adds blows to the other brutali- ty, and forces the animal to take between its jaws a piece of iron that freezes its tongue and sections of its mouth the mo - meat it touches them, causing not only present pain, but oftert ulceration,, and al- Da0St always sores. The remedy is a leathern bit, instead of a an iron one. If a bit of this sort is not easily procured, a common iron one can be covered; which will be at least a partial remedy. To do this, cover the bits with strips of commorl brictle lea,ther, and as et of Pooke . A shor time .sinc 4hile' our reporter was v itin a town in! the inUiriorl,•b4 m de _ . . . the a tut ntance of a well-to-do farmer, who, after ,1 aking some inquiries in egird to the gro , tit a=d ptoaperity of Detr it, in- . oired if t ere, were any pick -pockets in the city. The e0y Was a cohrtte in the ffi m- ative. •Th .tarmer -latighed quietly a o ment, and hen. said :--:- "1 don' often tell my first experienc in seeing the ions' of yout• city, .but 1 ty,,m ot as sensitiv over it now as I• and to be, ;id I'll tell' y» it about it. &hue years be nre my father ied,ohe went to New York ity on business, and wh4le there he bou ht himself a gold Watch. Ile wore it as 1 ng as he lived, and' when he died, a fe% y ars ago, it came to me. • Of course . as strongly attached to the watch, and not a little proud of it, especial y when I put it in -my pocketrupon the o casion of my rst visit , o-Detroit.li I .have 't any dou t hat I leo ed at it a /hundred times a .cla nd you -ill not be at all surPriSed when. I ell you.t at Ifhad not been' in the city . wo hou "befoie it was missing, chain and all. I informed the -clerk Of the hotel •-where I was stopping of my loss, and. as I did not remeinber of being jostled by any one, and could give no clue to the thief,he said there was 11Q use in calling in an officer. He ad- vised Me to offet• a large reward for the re- turn .fthe watch, and ,add that nal qUes- dons would be asktd. I then put sch an acli e tisement in the morning pape4s, Ind dui•ing the afternoon received a note in- form`ng me that if I would be at the or• ner of B. and L. streets that evenin at seve • o'clock, with the rewartl ($100), my wat • would 'be returned to tone, • l`le ote Ma() 8 ated that I must come I atone, itt.n if dUri g -the day I made any a tempt: to in-, ferm an officer, the Wcitfk W uld mit o eet me that I wauldbe watched at the t me, and the only way that 1 -way recover my watul was by doing precisely aS I advrti. ed. At se en o',)lock I was 'at the spot indica ed, and fter waiting a few moments, dress d man in passing tue asxed me the time of day. I .replied that it VOA s Yen o3clo k. At that he asked me to walk a ong with him short distance, an as we w lk- ed,. h inquired if Ilan broil ht the $ 00. rep ied in the affirmative, hen h h nd ci m my watch, and rective the o ey, 'and , as aboot to leave me, when I to ped nd told him 1 would h 10 more to tell m.e how he managed o sick I ockets. Oh !' said he, placing his finge, on his you promised - to ask no •quest* ons, but 'I would show ou, if wasn't .for ti at standing over there on the corn r. He i. a detective Offi ,er and ows me,' nd the man pointed ac oss the stireet. I loo -ed in t e direction the ad indicated, but ould see no one that ooked lik an office though there were pie ty of pe Ple stantiliteer in that locaFty, That tall fel- low •ith tbe stove -pipe hat, is the o e I nada • but I must be off. Good•by •he man hurried off, and I saw him -ft disap ear round a corner, then a„a:in tned to see the 'tall fellow with the stove- pipe at," btit if he had been there had disa peared,and I started for the hotel, ap- py again possessing my fathees last prese t•to me. At this thought I Ftut my hand upon my vest pocket, ivithere I P431' ced the ateh a moment before, /and th ext insta t VG1.1 could have knocked me d wn with a strwor, for the pocket was `empty. The hief had indeed complied with im re- ques and. shown 'me 'how it was'clbrie. I didn' advertise for it again, and I dame h‘mn without telling the hotel clerk about • •e that veningis expertertce.' much of the eheolci-pieee as will be likely to- ., touch tho flesh, winding them around the • iron while wet, and then carefully -sewing • the edges so as to make the surface as , smooth as possible. Let the Boys have Tools. A writer in4" Mechanical Recreations" in the " Soientific American" offers this sound advice : "Evety man who can afford it Should supply his boys with tools and a room, where they may be .used and cared for. A boy takes to tcols as naturally as to green apple; or surreptitious and forbidden amusements ; and ten to one, if he has it chance to develop his mechanical tastes and gratify them to their full extent, his tenden- cies to vicious courses will remain. undevel- oped. Such a result is enough to compensate - for all the expense and tiouble the indul- gence we recommend would entail; while the chances that the early development of his. constructive faculties may, 6 fife me- chanical age be the means by which.he may ultimately climb to fame and fortune are not small." This is very sound doctrine. A at Y an. eight that •exaC , •C)ne Ha,lf feliowi ndmed Donks was -lately I , for entering a miner's a bag of gol -dust value dollars. The testimony showed' e had been employed there, and knew ly where the owner -kept his dust : that on the night -specified h cut \a slight hole "n the tent, reached ba, C tealin ried out; at and - ,witn ?the the ‘, hen ran off. _Jim Bu ss, testified that he s tan reach in, and heard. rushed after him at on itness ; " but when I didn't find Bill's bag ; but after ar•dEr.Where he had 4hr " ow far did le get we dust ' intittired the council. ," ell, he was stoopin' o er, half Wa I sh uld say," replied the witness. lay it please your h no r," interp the ounsel,!'the indictme t silt suatai and shall demand an acq it al on dye, of the eourt The pri:son r s on tial n'ght-time vith m ny is clear that he tent 'Or ugh if bout.half otrimitted t charges Oa he r an enter a ouse 130 y is in an the le took the ,the prim the cat, tim run a ,• • e, cout atched hi ao• ipal saw ay. ued it was -1(. und wn it.'' he took the C e ente_ing a dwelling th ince t to steal. .The test he ade an lopening in whi he prOtrucled*hitus arid`, stretching his arm thef But the indictrne actu lly entered the ten No Your honor can. a., "whe only one half of his othe half our • shall leave the win jury They must judge fact proved," replied t e jury brought in Ve to e half of his body an the ther 1141f, T e- judge sentenced t two years int,prisonment, pris ner's! option to have cut if, or t take it alon oNsTEI I'm af crinoline, ma'am." never min ce ; you can't hurt ma'am it's not that; ing hurts me." sio • you lad que "N ed. t • in, sed • ed, tion for 9-31, the fJ le matter to the f t, e law an the e judge. ch ' t of guilt as ot 7ilty s to e guilt ,pa to ealving it to the innocent part w'th m sittin fable y t's of -no c it." Mout but the conf on ung nse- r.--- und- a OV-EMBEit 25, 1870, TE FISH, ABRA FIR OBERTSOYS P1-101VI FISII, OR HERRINGS AI tPA, ASO TROUT, SPL T 'AND ROUND HERRINGS, Warrant d New Ftnits- list Arrived. NEW LAYERS, PICKED V LENTIAS„ PRIME ziE DLESS AD CHOICE NEW CURRANTS. Will be sold as cheap as any est of Toronto. wr Give us a Call. Wm S i ROBERTSON. Seaforth, Nov. 15, 1870. A. Few Facts f r the People! First, 7at the Fmmtain Head:is the rig -ht ce z10"roc re any artzde at its rzght value SEcoND,--Tha, E. HICKSON & Co., of Seaforth, buy most of ,heir goods at tl e Manufact rer'S, in England, in large lots, and for Cash, consequently t leir establishment is the right place to purchase Good Goo e s at Low Prices. THIRD,—That they have ju t received a large Consignment of Crockery, China,, Glass-wa e, Plated -ware, Tea Trays, and House Furnishing Goods. FouRTH,—That they will -s111 you an Iron Stonc China Tea t for $2.50 and less, and-Tollet Sets from $1.50 to $2.50, and ice Set of Chiiia for $5.00, nd any ware by the single piece _ proportionately low prices.J Nickel Silver and Plated Tea d Table Spoons, at all prices. Butter bought and taken in change for any goods. Also, our stock of Groeeri Tea for 85 cents. s is Complete. A pound of splen- ANr, in Dry Gods, we ca oice of 200 pie es of Ash gland) for 14 ents a yard, onish you'VTe keep, a go k Messes, an4 a choice of as Si ot- be beat. Will,give you the on " Prints (the best made in and Whims at prices that will )dstockof Black and Coloured 50 pieces of Dress Goods. Our BOOTS Al) SHOES are Clothing Read T -made and Genuine Drugs, Medicines ble to sh6w for theniselves. ade to Order, and mad -e well. and .Dye Stuffs, as usual. •HICKSONS' EMP RIUM, SEAFORTH. !3/1011ELORS Ga MARRIED AT ONCE AS FURNITT R I 2 per cent. Cheaper Am HIPMS B E L'$ 0 ivi S _ HAS ADDED ElIEPOWE 13 To his Ea ilities, and i now selling , hole's le' and Retail 0 Be Sure to Call before Pur.i. chaing Elsewhere. W 4RE ROOMS OPPOSITEI KIDD & McMUIe KIN S. WORK SHO1P OORNE1 OF MARKET SQUARE T •RNIN done on the Shortest Notic C PFINS k pt const ntly.on ha,n0 A HE IRSE FOR HIRE. ORTH, Juitic 40, 1870. BUSH F* HE UNDE Lot No. 30, of It uron; about wi h hardwood, th lp.lance is ex ellent qualit te timber to pa be sold CHEAP in. 'sputable. by letter, prepai 8 forth, or to t hamesford, M FOR SALE CHEAP. SIGNED offers for sale, chea Jon. 15, township of Grey, C It) acres of this lot are timber our acres of which are choppe , tiered with cedar and pine fyii • There is flicient of this la --. for the whole lot. The lot' ' FOR CASBT, or on time. Tit e or further iarticu1ars apply ( f ) to Adam o -ray, Planing Mi e tmdersigned proprietor. ODERI.CKI GRAY, • , • Thamesford, P. ov. 9,1870. • 153-tf. GREAT Clearing SALE ! —A T BONTHRON &Son's rpHE UNDERSIGNED, INTENDING TO GIVE UP BUSINESS IN THE STAND THEY NOW OCCUPY, WILL SELL FOR i\T"E 0 i\T" rr Il THE WHOLE OF THEIR STOCK OF DRY GOODS, Cloth?, tg, Tweeds, &c., OR CASH, AT COST PRICE 00. Dress Goods of all kinds, At Cost Price. (Ready-fnade), • - At Cost Price. d Canadian Tweeds, - At Cost Price. d Jackets, • At Cost Price. large lot of BOOTS AND SHOES Small Advance on COST. o humbug. Parties wanting Cheap • d it to their advantage to give efore purchasing elsewhere. owing accounts will please call and they wish to close their Books Clothing, English Shawls a We also sell at a Or This is Goods, will them a call All parties settle them. at preAent. Seaforth, Oc BONT RON & SON. ber 3 1870. 132a - LIVERY STABLE. JAMES ROSS desiries to inform the public that he has openecta New Livery Stable in connection with his hotel, where parties can be accommodated with first-class • horses and vehicles, atreasonable prices, Seatorth, Jan'y. 21st, 1870. '97-tf. LUIVII3ER! ILI)110113ER undersi ed have on hand at their 'Mills, half a mild orth from the 'Village of Mu- leyviJe, 500,00 feet of Gid DRY PINE l'AtTMI.WR, of t followitt different kinds; viz --inch, inch an a half, and two inch, elear. A large lot, (over 1 0,000,) inch and a quarter, and inch and a half fi euring, both dressed and under. dressed, half iu h siding, common boards ape plank, 12, 14 an 16 feet long. Board and stri/ LATH, all of hich will be soia, at reduce prices. I t. maTelhieinyehatvothi ott elaetlyadesdemd aaelfiinrsetry, eclasasndplianatneinnag keeping 'dressed umber f all kinds constantly anband. Thopublic ma rely upon being able toprocure any of the abo e articles of Lumber at their Mills. so long as it is here adve-tised. Parties sending lumber to the mill can have e it dressed on the shortest notice and lowestpoisible terms. M. & T. SMITH. Airdeyviile, F b. 11, 1870. 114-tf CARD OF THANKS. THE undersi: ed desires to tender his sincere thanks to t • d farmers of Huron and public generally, for th liberal patronage helms receiv- ed since commencing 'the manufacture of Ploughs, etc., in Seaforth. Having Bad s venteen years experience in the •abqve business, he can with confidence rec.ora- mend his 1 Mgi 0 T,37 C31- S 1A8 FIRST CLASS GENERAL PURPOSh PLOUGHS, AND OF LIGHT DRAUGHT. Iron and wooden Ploughs with cast steel land- side- and. -mould boar ti constantly -071 hand, and made 'to order. . GRAHAM WILLI AMSON. Seaforth, August 26, 1870. THE SICN OF THE GOLDEN rpHE subscrib r begs to info* the public that 1:e has just eceived a great variety of Sad.- • dies and • T UNKs, Whic he is prepared to sell At Pr* ices Almost Unparelleled. —0 COITLAIR of every description, warrant ed not to hurt the horse's neck. I11 the way of Harness • cilF ALL KINDS, • He is, as heretefore, in a position to give his . customers as good value for their moneaeas • any otherestablisliment in Ontario. Quality of work and material, employed, indis- • putable. •- ttar SHOfi OPPOSITE KIDD & MeilfULKIN'S, JOHN CAMPBELL. 524. Seaforth, Jan. 31. 1870. SEAF , 10.1-1 SALT ! COLEM N & GOTTINLOCK OULD R PETFULLY inform the pub- licethat they now have their SALT WORKS' ! SEA F ORTH COM LETED, AND AREI PREPARED TO RECEITE AND FILL, ALL RDE.RS FINE, • COAFS AND LAND SALT. TERMS CASH. Seaforth, Sept 1.4th,11870. 145-tfe- SEAFORTH PIAAIVG Sash, Door, and BLI. itioAcT IRY THE Subscribers beg leave to thank their nu- merous etu4oineils for the very liberal patron- age extended. to then t since commencing business In Seaforth, and trust that they will be favored with a 'continuance of the same. Parties intending to build would do well to gieee them a call, as." they will continue to keep -on hand a large Stock of all kinds of DRY PINE, LUMBER, SASHES DOORS, BLINDS, MOULDINCS, SHINGLES, Thwer:ofemaei cyonfient of giving satisfaction to those &C., , favour them with their patronage,, as none but first class workmen are Pi Or Particular attentiemonplea paid to Custom Planing,, BROADFOOT& GRAY. -1 - Dreadful Eflcoiuyi - One of the most shoe tome under our notice for about two miles from le last. The particulars,. ableio gather thein, are Staigerd, a well to do yon Back street, Southweld, le 'evening to drivehieowel the same fieldeevith whiel, ithred years old. From sm animal became fan -ions an ' ford,,hitting him a fearful n throWing. him to the greun gained Ini feet, -when the , renewed, Finding that t escape he grappledithe bit tossed about in eu4m a powerful brate that his et way, im.a he fell baaward -this position the atta.ek w butting savagely and malu gore With his horns, until one -mass of wounds and b every stitch of .clotfaing sat Finally the brute -suecee legs and body on his he downward drive, broke 11 neck.' From that Moment feeling in the lowei extre bull after playing With the ed slowly away, iMeinw came sitiea.ey at the! eontin ',sande and went to the fiel one time /the passed very but $o Much afraid was turn upon her thati he re , After A Vain attempt to home; and sent for A,oine nei ed the tea.reh withlentera until they found tlie unfo ner deseaed, but perfee to give a succinct aecfnmt Dr. 'daseaden, ofIlona,'ai. this 011731, were sent for, broken spine, but lieyond They found the ininrie,s of man cannot possiblv survi been ae1100l teaelipr for s quite --ecently rat'. - froni T gage in farining pa, uits. ,by all who know hin, and 'dition he has the ey utpatha 8t. nomas Home ounr41. Stimulant vs. In a late number of the able article by Dr. Wilk nourishment for the a the foliowiag Now, what do I tonstan practice ? The patient' lady, and the doctor and as to the nature of the ran, and the treatment req sure the fulfilment of his two Manes have been pre in attenda.nee with a dev Now, iwhat is the condi has teen ill for a *tit*, He is extremely wasted, restkas wakeful, 01' de and ldinilse 150. 1 am tient has had plenty of shown the table before me beef tea, jelly, brandy bott wine decantent. I am fa patient has had three ea daily, ;eight or ten *mutes glasses tif champagne, and nig five grains of ammonia, - prove the regularity of t these different things, th written papers' and voucher that the patient is dyin *• latione No 'mortal ma. condition -who had been at little beef tea and ielly f mented by brandy,, eham In fact, I scarcely 16ott A duce yeasting, hot skin, par heart, ;delimit. eptless drawing the picture, an it, I see them every,day. wine Or brandy in their judiciously administered. ; jct length ftheassumptiontimebetaierta. I confess, too, to be almost when 1 see my.own plospita and see the young is ple literally dying of et reatio so. Sketches in ti*ing I — "An hidependent m writes some clever iartie Post, in. whielLhe clO4s _not bers. Among his latest sk ing Lord Fitzrahurice, ing -speecb on the Univ younger brother of Lord youth, only about four a Nevertheless, he has made of his' time, and his abilitk ful. ne was educated at took at the university a ancl finally succeeded in be chssies. What wasi, better achievements, he reMained college eareer, despite all te the gentIerainly ereed. vor. He is a nobleman, in the House ; he liais a go and a due share of the IU But More than this, he careful preparation, an commends attention! Of Mr, Hadfield, avh same debate, the writer say "What aemarvelous oa just upon eighty-four years , still all the viva -city and br rnarches up the Hone with as that of a man of 'tarty, promptness and gayety of noticeable; He was Married was bor' n a.nd had been when thebattle of Water most men begin to think about arranging their affam of emnineneing- life afresh, entered. Parliament as mem still stickslo his; somewhat a tail -coat, which he- wears this gives him a somewhat were put into a frock -coat, he might pass for thirty 3, is. The vehemence fwish w into the debate WAS so voice is not of the k4nd su fort, but he made it till the House chee Id, not elation of the old II anis hearty English love r bi Puna, Os.—e the half -penny Iettei can Exigland, and which are, the letters 1;e4 Written o wbile -the addrens is on the portioii than. is supposea of notes, which are sent by po 'patched open. The -eenten concern no one aaxe the though, possibly,,0 they cOnvey no real infoi leaat, not such as eft'. How soon shili we lset great postal imrove be to =cream than did the introdue o ---Witateme