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HomeMy WebLinkAboutThe Huron Expositor, 1870-02-18, Page 14 [A RTFO R Dry. President, S etaiy. imams CartSaadi of M. popularplai .adopted - ipe IAA° -Joico msnabesshi $14.00. This, in & full life for . D AS AQE T$ MELIGGNT, HONES r, ior the Mutual ibimea enough to be $e its _new System of" th to appreciate it flettzl of its. se, `orityfearless it n3We+arguments in ion. SUCH It1EN ifiit Company effete tet -clans I: 1110,11 C Gersh ..eget for mut S•aforth, P.Q. ,erred who • can canvass. sue - o e wisa know tb•es4 ationr needed, 1ltK3-tf O n COLDER r ljw `to inform the its that caved a great variety of Sad- dles :and: LINKS fie iA prepared to Deli: 41most Unpareltekd- -Q of every description, w7erant. t. the horse's node way of Harness E` ALL RINDS, !~ore, in a position to give, hue' enid value for their money lei establishment in Ontario. and material,_ employed, . isdis- putable. OPPO SITIt KIDD JOHN CAMPBELL. Jl. I&1O: ` 4.E BEST. itish American AND •STRATTON x O<1tE'L •TEA BUSINESS COLLEGE t, most extensive aim complete BOOL iii • the country. It has: of, Teachers, the most- practical business forms, aped the bait ar commodious apartments-: management of thorough hngi- rlive to all the. requirement& `of' con iuruty, is and facilities agerded in this iecluel ledin the country, and no Id enter a business career. with- hiniaf of its benefits We le L' BUSINEStt WRITING I acial Exhibition. at London. As consecnt ve year that we have: we feel confident that there. eau 'fou as where to go to learn: to of.writing, banknotes,. threshing, is ODFLT, et TROUT,. Toronto. ;cod value for your meney in go to T. Coventry's. 87-tf citsoots and Shoes in Seaforth lity go to Coventry's. 87 •tf. FOR SALE. er offerer for Sale, fifty Acres of from forty to forty-five Aerea ed, and in good state of cultivat- teed of South half of Lot, No: eon. Grey on the Gravel Road, Rage of Airileyville. Tittle in- ,rticuiars apply personally or by D. MOLLISOI, Grey, P.O. 4E,, Seaforth. !8, 18764 112-6ins • ()TICE TO SE MAKERS. Coad Cheese Factory, which is 'ownahip of ` Hibbert, County of is situated in a first-class dei %le or rent.. Sealed Tenders wil✓ the 15th Fels, next, 12 o'clock her particrdars apply on the ANDREW MALCOLM.. Farquhar, P.O. r, 2a, 1870. 1121 VIM. F. LUXTON, " Freedom in Trade -Liberty in _Religion—Equality in Civil Rights". EDITOR & PUBLISNER. VOL. 3, NO. 11,. SEAFORTH, FRIDAY FEBRUARY 18, 1870 WHOLE NO. 115. -BUSINESS DARDS. MEDICAL.- RTRACY, M. D., Coroner for the County of , Huron. Office and Residence -One door East of the Methodist Episcopal Church. Seaforth, Dec. 14th, 1868. 53- ly esL. VERCOE, M. D. C. M„Physician; Sur - , geon, etc., Office and Residence, corner of Market and High. Street, immediately inrear of Kidd & McMulkin's Store. Seaforth, Feb. 4th. I870. 53-1y. DR. W. R. SMITH, Physician, Surgeon, etc. Office,—Opposite Veal's Grocery. Resi- dence—Main-street, esi- dence—Main-stree , North.' Seaforth, Dec. 14, 1863. 53-iy T CAMPBELL, M, D. C. M., (Graduate of W- O , Gill University, Montreal) Physician, Sur- geon, etc., Seaforth. Office and Residence—Old Post Office Building, up stairs, where he will be found by night or day when at home. Seaforth, July 15th, 1869. 84-ly LEGAL. C. CAMERON, Barrister and Attorney -at , Law, Goderich. Ont. December 14th, 1569. 53-tf- & ELWOOD, Barristera and Attorneys IIAYS at Law, Solicitors in Chancery, Notaries Public Conveyancers,. etc. Office. — Over Mr. Archibald's Store, Crabb's Block, Goderich, Ont. Money to Lend. Wt TORRANCE HAYS, J. Y. ELWOOD. Seaforth, Dec, 14th, 1868° 53-1y. ENSON & MEYER, Barristers and Attorney at Law, Solicitors in Chancery and insoly- tency, Conveyancers, Notaries Public, etc. Of ;fices,—Seaforth and Wroxeter. Agents for the Trust and. -Loan Co, of Upper Canada, and the Colonial Securities Co. of London, England. Money at 8 per cent ; no commission, charged. JAS. H. BENSON, H. w. C. MEYER. Seaforth, Dec. 10th 1868. 53-ly /r IC AUG HEY & HOLMSTEAD, Barristers, 1y� Attorneya at Law, Solicitors in Chancery and Insolvency, Notaries Public and Conveyanc- ers. Solicitors for the- R. C. Bank, Seaforth, ` Agents for the Canada Life Assurance Co. N B.—$30,000 to lend at 8 per cent. Farms, Houses and Lots for sale. Seaforth, -Dec. 14th, 1868. ° 53-tf. FF. WALKER. Attorney -at -Law and So- , o- .licitor-in-Chancery, Conveyancer, Notary Public, &c. Office of the Clerk of the Peace, Court House, Goderich, Ont. N.B.—Money to lend at 8 per cent on Farm Lands. Goderich, Jan'y. 28. 1870. 112-1y. DENTAL. G._ W. HARRIS, L. D. S. Arti- ficial Dentures inserted with all the latest improvements. The greatest care taken for the preservation of decayed and tender teeth. Teeth extracted without pain. Rooms over Collier's Store. Seaforth. Dec. 14, 1898. 1y. HOTELS. ARPHOTEL, Livery Stable, and Genera SH,S Stage Office, Main -street. R.L SHARP, g Prop. Seaforth, Jan. 8th, 1869. 53 :tf. COMMERC1AL . HOTEL, Ainleyville, James Laird, proprietor, affords first-class accom- modation for the travelling public.- The larder and bar are always supplied with the best the markets afford. Excellent stabling in connection Ainleyville, April 23, 1869. 70-tf. JR. ROSS, Proprietor New Dominion Hotel, , begs to inform the people of Seaforth and the travelling community generally, that he keeps first-class accommodation in, every thing required by travellers. A good stable and. willing' hostler always on hand, Regular Boarders will receive every necessary attention. Seaforth, Feb. 8th, 1869. 63-1y. ARCHITECTS. 0 MAILL & CROOKE, Architects, etc. Plans and Specifications drawn correctly. Carpen- ter's, Plasterer's. and. Mason's work, ' measured and valued. Office—Over J. C. Detlor & Co.'s store, Court -House Square, Goderich• Goderich, April 23, 1869. 79-1y. HENRY WATKINSON, Architect and d Build- er . Plans, Specifications ant Details drawn correctly. Every description of Building Works measured and valued. Bills of quantities pre- pared. OFFICE. —Next door North of Mr. Hick - son's old store, Seaforth. Seaforth, June 9th, 1869. 9-tf SURVEYORS. &. W. McPIIILLIPS, Provincial Land Sur- veyors, Civil Enbineers, etc. All manner of Conveyancing done with neatness and dispatch. 0G. McPhillips, Commissioner in B. R. Office— Noxt door south of Sharp's Hotel, Seaforth. Seaforth, Dec. 14, 1868. 53-ly. AUCTIONEER. HAZLEHURST,_ Licensed Auctioneer fo theCountyof Huron B Goderich, Ont t Particular attention paid to the sale of Bankrupt Stock. Farm Stock. Sales attended on Liberal Terms. Goods Appraised, Mortgages Foreclosed, Landlord's Warrants Executed. Also, Bailiff 'First Division Court for Huron. Goderich, June 9th, 1869. 76. tf, WEIGHING THE BABY. How many pounds does the baby weigh,. Baby who came but a month ago ? -How many pounds from thecrowning curl To the rosy point of the restless toe?• Grandfather ties the 'kerchief's not, Tenderly guides the swinging weight, And carefully over his glasses pears To.read the record, "only eight." Softly the echoe goes around ; The father laughs at the tiny girl ; The fair young Mother sighs the words, While grandmother smoothes thegolden curl. And stooping above the precious thing, Nestles a kiss within a prayer, Murmuring softly: "Little one, Grandfather did not weigh you fair." Nobody weighed the baby's smile, Or the lovethat came with the helpless one ; Nobody weighed the threads of care From which a woman's life is spun. No index tells the mighty worth Of little baby's quiet breath, A soft unceasing menatrone, • Patient and faithful unto death. Nobody weighed the baby's soul, For here on earth no weight there be, That could avail; God only knows Its value in eternity. Only eight pounds to hold a soul That seeks no angel's silver wings, But shines m it this human guise, Within so small and frail a thing ! Oh, mother, laugh your merry notes ; Be gay and glad, but don't forget From baby's eyes outlook a soul That claims a home in Eden yet. A PHYSICIAN'S STORY. I had been engaged some years in the practice of medicine in one of our largest cities before I met with any serious adventure. One night as I was returning home through a lonely and unfre- quented part of the city, at a late hour, from (a patient I had been with since noon of that day, and whom I was now permitted to leave by reason of a favorable change, I was suddenly stopped in a dark gloomy out of the way spot, by a gruff, coarsely dressed man. " You're a doctor !" he both announced and. enquired in the same words. " I am." I replied. " I want you to come with me then." he said in a tone that indicated the matter was already settled in his mind, however it might be in mine. " I cannot to -night," I answered with a posi- tive emphasis. " I am all wearied out and anxious to get 'home." _ "Yes, you doctors are always wearied out when a poor man wants you," said the fellow with a threatening growl ; " but only let some snob's wife's poodle dog need looking to, and you find your way there at any hour of the day or night. Well, I'm no snob, thank heaven, and I've moneyenough to pay your fee. I've tried half a dozen doctors already, andinone of them will come—and so, yeu see, I can't let you off." " But really—" ` See here,. fellow ,producing interrupted the fello, producing a knife, and flashing the blade by a quick flourish before my eyes. " I'm a desperate man and might be pushed to do a wicked deed. Every man sets a certain value on his own life, and also on!his beat friend. You really know how much your life's worth to yon, and I know how much another's life is worth . to me, and 'fore heaven, I swear, if you attempt to leave my friend to die, I'll put this knife into you ?" It was an open space where we stood, about half way between two blocks of new buildings that were not yet tenanted. I looked up and down the dark street but not a soul was in sight. " Where do you wish me to go ?" I enquired, " O, down here apiece," he said, jerking his thumb over his shoulder. "Come on before it's to late." " Is your friend a male or female ?" I asked. " She's a woman." he replied. I breathed more free, for somehow I always experienced a degree of security among the op- posite sex—even among . the most depraved and abandoned. " What is the matter with her, and how long has she been ill ?" I asked. "About three or four hours ago she gave birth to a child that didn't live a minute, and since then she's been having fits," was the reply. " Was there no physician with her when the child was born ?" I enquired. No, I couldn't get one for love or money. An old woman, a neighbor, came in and did whatshe could. _ Do you think as how you can save her, doctor ?" inquired the man, in a huskytone. " i cannot say, of course, but I will promise to do thebest I can." O, do, do, and heaven will bless you for it," he rejoined, sin a tone that expressed a [more deep and earnest feeling than II supposed was in his nature. I began to be interested. ; the man might be better than I had .thought ; some poor fellow, perhaps who had been the foot -ball of fortune, and hd not receivd his deserts. " Is this woman your wife ?" I kindly .enquired. I believe he heard me ; but as he. (did not ans- wer, I concluded not to repeat the question. We soon turned into some small, mean, da:ik, narrow streets, where none bnt the poorer claases live. We now walked forward in silence—the man, who had hold of my arm, : as if he were afraid I might give him the slip, taking long rapid strides, and causing me no little exertion to keep step with him. At length he turned into a dark court where I could see nothing but; a few dingy buildings on either side ; and 1 thought if hia object was to robme, "I was completely in his power.—At the for end of this court he stopped, opened a door, and led me up a flight of creaking stairs. Grop- ing our way forward a few feet, he then opened the door into the room of the patient. The a- partment was small and poorly furnished, with a lampstanding on a little table not far from the bed. An old woman who was leaning over the sufferer, looked quickly and eagerly around at our entrance, and seeing me, exclauned : . " Is he a doctor , ' •' Yes, yes, I've gqt a ,doctor at last, God be praised, if it ain't too late," replied the man hurriedly ; adding almost in the- same breath, " How is she ?" The old woman shook her head, and sighed out. "• She's had three on 'em since you left ; she's in the fourth now, poor dear." " Oh, my God !" groaned the man, sinking down upon the nearest seat. • ` Doctor, you hear? Oh, save her, save her !" I hurried to the bed and found the patient in convulsions. The spasms ceased almost imme- diately ; a considerable quantity of viscid matter'. was ejected, and a heavy snoring respiration fol- lowed. The face was flushed, the head hot, and the pulse rapid. I decided that she must be bled, and I lost no time in opening ning a vein. I then sent - for ice and applied it in, moderation to her head. I remained with her through the night, and left her at daylight in a tranquil sleep, with directions to be followed in case of a return of the spasms. The man, who gave his name as Ralph Wagner, came down to the door with me and put a half eagle in my hand. " How is she ?" he %eked, in a trembling voice. " Is she better ? can you save her ?" ` She is better, I think, and Ihope she can be saved," I replied. " Oh, doctor, will you come again. to -day ?" • ` Yes, this afternoon toward night, after I shall have got some sleep and visited some few patients that cannot be neglected." " Don't desert us, doctor ! for God's sake, don't," fairley pleaded the man, with tears in his eyes. - I promised, gavehim my address, and bade him send for me at any time, if a change should take place for the worse. From that time the patient gradually mended, and in the course of a week was out of danger and had her reason. ' I had seen her every day during this time and had become not a little in- terested in her. She was not an ordinary woman. Her age I judged to be about twenty-five or six, and her features, though marked by suffering, were intellectual and still beautiful. Her hair was light brown, soft almost to silkness, and she had the sweetest blue eyes and pretties mouth I ever beheld. Great was the contrast between the pretty deli- cate flower, andthe big -coarse -featured, awkward, uneducated,. and I must add, totally unprepos- sessing RalphWagner,;. and though I fancied I -could comprehend how such a man might love her to the whole extent of his rough, coarse nature. I confess I was at a loss to account for true reci- procity, if indeed there was any such thing. That his ardent attachment to her Might excite some curiosity, some emotion akin to pity, and perhaps to gratitude—•I_ thought possible ; but that there should exist anything like true and natural love, seemed as contrary to the laws of nature as for the doe to love the tiger. And yethow many such incongruities we see paired, if not mated ; married by law, if not in spirit. The day that I made what I intended should be my last visit, I found my patient sitting in a chair and crying as if her heart would break. She was alone, " This is very bad for you -to be exciting your nervous system in this manner," I said in a kind.- ly reproving tone. • ` Has anything' happened too serious for a little calm philosophy to master ?" " Oh. doctor," she exclaimed, "I am a poor miserable, heart broken woman, alone -and friend- less." - jT " Oh, not quite so bad at that. I think," I ans- wered lightly. " Where is your husband ?" This was the first time I had ever spoken the word husband to her, and I looked to see if she received it as a familiar unquestioned fact. She shuddered and covered her eyes with her hands. " Did you see in the papers, this morning," she sobbed, ' ` the arrest of a notorious burglar, called Patent Hammersmith ?" `` I think I did see something of the kind," I replied. - " That was none other than Ralph Wagner." " Good heavens ? you amaze me," I cried— "Your husband a burglar 1" " He is not myhusband sobbed the poor wo- man." No.," " Sit down, doctor, and let me tell you a pain - full story in a few words, , and then if you can give me good advice and sympathy, I shall receive- i with gratitude ; and if you scorn and cast me fronj you I shall find I was mistaken in supposing you had at heart." I seated self and became all attention. " I was re red in affluence," she resumed, "and for sevcntee years was the pride and joy of fond parents. A seventeen I fell in with a man some years older t an myself, whom I believed to,, be perfection it elf. My father knew better and warned me against him. He finally forbade him to the house. , We went as I supposed to the house of a Clergyman, and were married, and then set off on a wedding tour. The man I had . so wildly loved proved to be a black -hearted villain, and soon robbed me of; all my money and jewels, and then deserted me in a strange city. He after- wards wrote n • that the marriage was a sham, and that he had deceived me in that manner in order to revenge himself on my father for his insults. A blank followed this awakening from a bright and glorious dream to a reality too horrible for any ordinary ruind to contemplate. I had a brain fever. I became insane. I returned to reason in a pauper mad -house. I got my liberty in rags. -I wrote home to my father the whole terrible truth, and implored him to receive back his poor, wretched, broken-hearted daughter. I was a ragged mendicant in a strange city, and God only knows with what intense and fearful anxiety Waited the answer to that letter. I wait- ed days—I waited months. None ever came. I was cast off then—abandoned—ruined for this world and for the next. Oh, the suffering and de sedation I was compelled to endure. At last Ralp Wagner offered me his hand, and I accepted. We were married. He declared he loved me, and certainly treated me with respect and showed affection. I knew not then he was a house -break-, er, and when I found out I asked myself what better I was than he that I should leave him. So I have lived with him ever • since, nearly two years, and now he is arrested, and I am again alone in the world. Such is = my sad. history, doctor. Now tell me What to do." Write again to your parents," I said. " they may not have received your letter, or their reply may have been miscarried." " I have sometimes hoed so, and I want to die in delusion, if it be one,' she eagerly rejoined. " If I were to get an answer now that they knew my condition and have cast me off forever, it might craze my poor brain again. Besides, I am no longer fit to be forgiven and received back aanong the good." "Itis never to late to repent," I replied. "Re- member the words of Christ to the men who would have put to death the guilty woman for her crime : ' He that is without sin among you, let him first cast a stone at her.' We all have our errors, and need forgiveness." After hearing much more of a similar purport, I urged her to.allow me to write to her parents, and let me ascertain in my own way if they still lived and cared for her. She finally consented and wrote the address ono. slip of paper. I read it and sprang from my seat and looked at her in per- fect amazement. She waa:my sister's child. It was all a mistake on her part—her letter never reached her almost distracted parents who had long mourned her as dead, or lost to them forever.. She went home with me, and remained at my house until her fond and loving parents came to reclaim her. It was a tearful scene of commingled joy and grief when we met under the same roof ; and humbly, on our knees we all thanked. God for the wonderful restoratiien, as a brand from the burning, and saved in body, and I trust in soul. 'Three years after, Ralph Wagner died, and with him perished one great portion of the guilty secret. My sad story, excepting in names, is a true one. Lady Bankers on Broad Street. King Solomon was_of opinion that there was nothing new under the sun. On general princi- ples he was; perhaps, right ; but when we come to specialities, details and modifications of old thiage he was. wide of the mark. Something new in this line is turning up every day, and among the latest, and the most promising of new things is the female banking firm in Broad street of Woodhull, Claflin & Co. They` have created a new sensation on Change," not so violent as, but more profound than the gold -corner 'panic of that awful " black Friday," and these lady financiers, as dealers in bills bonds, stocks, &c., appear to be so firmly seated . iu the saddle and so confident and so well posted that the notion prevails among the lame ducks and old foxes of Wall street that Vanderbilt, the old- est fox of them all, is at the bottom of the ex- periment. No matter. If successful it gpens a new and boundless field for employment -to wo- men—a regular California gold placer, not only in New York, but in every city and town in the United States, and in both hemispheres. But if it should fail? Fail. ! These ladies of the new' banking firm, they say, are backed by a capital of half a niilion, and that they cannot fail. At all events, we like the experimentas a new thing, and we wish it success .—New York Her- ald. TRANSMIssIoN OF COLOR.—Professor Tyndall in his fourth lecture at the Royal Institution upon "Light, asked, "Why is blue glass blue?" and answered it by placing a sheet of blue glass in the path of the rays between Ow lamp and the spectrum; instantly it cut off all the rays,of the s ectrum but the blue, the rest of the space on the screen previously occupied by color being then all darkness Blue glass, therefore, is blue ,becanse it quenches and cuts off all the colors of the spectrum butt the blxe raya. It is the same with blue liquids. In like manner red liquids,, such as claret, quench all rays in white light but the red ones, and these pass through. He then threw a small spectrum—from a round hole in- stead or aslit—upen the screen; and by the ain- terposition of another lens he obtained white ght, thereby proving by synthesis that white lightconsists o sists of many colors mixed together. Next he proved that most of the rays emitted by the sun, by the electric light, and by other lu- minous sources, are perfectly invisible to the eye. This is very . interesting and conclusive so tar as it goes, and yet the question remains; Why does a piece of glass cut off all rays except those of one color ?—Christian Union. 'ill .► MRs. IRwIN, a sister of Mrs. Stonewall Jack - eon, ha.s secured a patent for an improvement in the construction of houses, which is claimed, will create a new era in architecture. Mrs. Irwin proposes six -walled or hexagonal apartments, which ate not only much handsomer, but really cheaper than the quadrangle form. A wall of eighty feet, built m the hexagonal form incloses one-third more apace than the same length of wall built-in the square form, and as these hexagonal rooms fit into each4other without loss of• space, the gain in the whole building is very great. The patentee also claims that this mode of building gives a .greater degree of strength than any other, and that this mode of building, in the hands of a good architect is capable of assuming greater artistic beauty than the square or quadrangular form. The octagonal building attracted a good deal of attention some years ago, but the hexago- nal is claimed to be something entirely new.— Canadian Builder. . MANUFACTURE OF GLASS :—A novelty in glass making has been brought out by Albert Putsch, Herman Putsch, and George Leuffgen, of Berlin. It consists in using glass pots made of iron instead of fire clay. The inside of the iron vessel is to be lined with fire -proof material, but if may in some cases, be left partly or entirely without such lining. - In some cases, the bottom or -lower part only is made of iron, while the sides are of water- proof material ; but in all /eases, no matter the shape of the vessel, it is necessary to keep the sides and bottom cool, either r by atmospheric air or by artificial streams of air or water. The top of this vessel or tank is arched over, leaving the necessary openings for working, and for the en- trance and exit of the flame, which passes over the surface of the materials contained in the tank, and melts them. The fire place may be of any suitable form and construction, and the tank supported in the ordinary manner —Scientific American: -40464r- A TEXT sox YouNa Max.—A better- subject for young men to mediate upon was never written than the following by swift : "No man ever made, an ill figure who understood his own talents, nor a good one who mistook them." Young men do'not fail in pursuits in life because they lack ability to succeed, half as often as from the ne- glect to study the real calibre of their minds. A moderate capacity, industriously directed, will accomplish much more than a wrong application of the most brilliant qualifications. Study, therefore, yourselves. Aim to find out the actual talents you possess, and endeavor to make the best use of them, and you can hardly come short of making a good figure in the world ; and, what is more, beinwone amongst those wko lived' not 3.e, vain.. ;E VARIETIES. A. T. Kettle is the only singer who never hada cold. • "Should old acquaintance be forgot ?" Not if they have money. Life is a beautiful night, inwhich, as some stars go down, others rise. A telegram from South Carolina says : "The Legislature adjourned to attend Robinsons's Circus. " ' . Sydney Smith recommended as the best system of wooden pavements for London, that the Al- dermen should "lay their heads together." At Winchester Viz 'a, a man prophesied that he would die on the �, but he only got a brok- en head from a chair in hfs wiie's hands. A philosophic editor in Atlanta remarks ::"A Ku -K lux editor calls us a liar; but we have not sufficient confidence in his word to believe him. imitate the example of the locomotive. He runs along, whistles over his work, and yet never takes anything but water when he wants to "wet his whistle." A Tennessean was last week sentenced to death for horse stealing, and then, on being convicted on another indictment for the same crime, waa sentenced to twenty-one years imprisonment. A lady in Kansas, just from the East, the other day noticed an animal from the car window, and inquired of a peanut boy if it was a buffalo. The boy answered in a 'twinkling, "Them's a mule." Two wags were speaking about the fancy dres ses they intended wearing at a forthcoming ball, "Oh" said a comic, "I shall go disguised in li- quor." "Don't," was the immediate reply, "ev- ery one will recognize you." A man called another an extortioner, for suing him. "Why, my friend," replied the man who brought the suit, "I did it to oblige you." "To 'oblige me, indeed—how so ?" "Why to oblige you to pay me," The Columbus, Mis. Sentinel has a notice of an individual there who tried to outwalk a locomo- tive, winding up with the significant statement that he leaves a wife and three children . in straightened circumstances. - An Albany man, who had his new hat ex- changed for an old one, in a barber's shop, adver- tises that unless it is returned he will forward to the wife of the person who took it the letter found in the lining of the old one. An Ohio journal tells a story of a widow- a spiritualist—who was recently married by a me- dium whom she had not seen for two years, he being dead, and who, after the ceremony, went home and sat down to a sumptuous marriage feast. A school boy being asked to define the word - "Admission," said it ment twenty-five cents, Twenty-five cents 1' echoed the master, whet Sort of a definition is • that ?" "I don't know, sulkily replied the boy, "but I am sure it says so on the advertisment do' vn here at the show:" A major in the United. States army was cross- ing from England in one of -the Canal steamers, when one afternoon a band on deck played "Yankee Doodle." A gruff Englishman who stood by enquired whether that was the tune the old cow died of. `Not at all," retorted the ma- jor ; "that is the tune the old Bull died. of." A merchant in Lewiston, Me, was in the habit of removing the nut from one of his buggy wheels at night in order to give the thieves a smash up is case his vehicle should be stolen. One morning recently he forgot to replace the nut, and in com- pany ompany with a friend went for a drive. A general smash up was the result. He leaves the nut on the wheel now. • If there be a situation wherein woman may be deemed to appropriate angelic attributes, it is when she ministers, as only woman can, to - the wants and weakness of the invalid :; Whose hand like hers can smooth the . pillow ? whose voice so effectually silences the querulous- ness of his temper, orsoothes the anguish of _his disease ? Preferred by her, the viand. path an added zest, and even the nauseous medicant is di- vested of its loathsomeness. No man is a -gentleman who, without provo- cation, would treat with incivility the humblest of his species. It is a vulgarity for which no ac- complishments of dress or address can even;atone. Show us the man who desires to make every one happy and whose great solicitude is never to give just cause of offence to anyone, and we will show you a gentleman by nature and by practice, though he may never have worn a suit of broad- cloth, nor have ever heard of a lexicon. In Burgundy there prevails a curious system of surrounding the tops of chimneys, •3with elabor- ate iron work, in order to prevent storks from making their nests in the chimneys. One of the causes of such a guard being adopted seems to have been that a snake once weighed down the chimney into the drawing -room of a chateau, and then the servants went out to see how the un- welcome visitor made its way in, they found a stork looking into the chimney curiously, aid evidently wondering g what had become of its 1'n- ng tended dinner. In Arkansas, Elder Knapp, while baptising converts at a revival meeting, advanced with a wiry, sharp-eyed old chap into the water. He asked the usual question, whether there was any reason why the ordnianceof baptism shouldnot be administered. After .a pause a tall powerful looking chap, with an eye like a blaze, who was leaning on a long rifle, and quietly looking on, remarked : '4Elder, I dont want to interfere in this yere business any, but I want to say that is an old , sinner you have got hold of, and I know that one dip won't do him any good. It you wan't to get the sin out of him you'll have iv anchor him out in deep water over night." . . O'Connel was amazingly powerful at times ; but one of his most effective displays was a silent reply 'to a youthful member who had made an attack. upon him that was quite unique. The al- most heartless assailant was so much frightened at his own audacity, that, after a few stammer- ing sentences, he broke down,- and making vari- ous wild and .noisless gestures, tumbled upon his seat amidst a chaos of sounds. -The "shouting having subsided, the Great Agitator rose , and looked at the greatly agitated with so Colne ,a smile that uproarious laughter was the imutedi- ate result; glen, shaking his head as much as to say, "the poor fellow has quite enough," he turn• ed quietly to the speaker And began to ttilk about something else. Better acting'was neverseen,on- auy stage.