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HomeMy WebLinkAboutZurich Herald, 1955-05-12, Page 6Where is "INV Fields' Missing Money? Tales of Eccentric Comedy King Calling all bankers! Have you an account in a queer sounding name — such as Felton J. Sat- ehelstern, Mahatma Jeeves, Pro- fessor Curtis T. Bascomb, or Mortimer Snavely — that was opened some years ago by an American? If you have, it is very likely That yOur bank is holding some of the missing money of the comedian W. C. Fields who died on Christmas Day eight years ago. The great comedian had often starved as a tramp before his genius lifted him to wealth and the experience had left him with a horror of ever again being penniless. Wherever he went, on tours that carried him around the world, he would open a new bank account by paying in most of his weekly pay cheque and use some grotesque -sounding Zame. Then he would go away leaving the, money in the bank and apparently forget all about it. In time he came to have about NO bank accounts in banks all over the world. When he died his executors set out to try to trace these ac- counts. They are still searching and after eight years they have succeeded in running down only thirty of them. Some hundreds of thousands of dollars earned by this king of comedy remain undiscovered: they lie in idle acounts in Eu- rope, America, South Africa and Australia to the credit of Pro- fessor Sep timu s Schmelling- borne, Henry J. Spitzburger and others. Nevertheless, Field's recover- able estate amounted to nearly e million dollars. He willed that it should be used to build a home for white orphans. This man's fear of being short of money, a heritage from the days when he slept on park benches, under newspapers, also led him to carry enormous sums about on his person. Once when setting out for California in his limousine, he showed New York reporters $350,000 he was carrying—in 1,- 000 -dollar bills. His legacy to white orphans was not without its ironic side. Claude William Dunkenfield, as he was until the stage discovered his better-known name for him, was one of the few men to try ;seriously to make himself an orphan. Up till the age of eleven he lived with his father, a strug- gling fruit pedlar in Philadel- phia. Father Dunkenfield chas- tised his son. One story says that Fields ruined some of his father's stock with clumsy practising of the juggling art of which he was later to become such a master. Another story says that Pa Dunkenfield stepped on a shovel and barked his shins, and to teach his son not to lea.ve such things about, Pa hit Claude Wil- iam on the shoulder blade. Whatever the cause there was a misunderstanding which Claude William made worse by ambushing his father and drop- ping a heavy wooden box on his head. Pa was knocked out by it and Claude William seized the opportunity to leave home and never return. Only when he was famous and DRESS UP AND PROTECT YOUR FLOWER BEDS AND SHRUBS with ," OTACO patent pending P01,0114% FEticE The only folding fence to provide extra heavy gauge galvanized steel wire, hard baked enamel finish. Ten ft. lengths fold into packs for easy storage insist on OT4C0 . . the' WEST in Folding Fence. CAN SE ERECTED IN ANY SHAPE Ask for ()TACO Folding Fence at vonr hardware or variety store or order direct with Oda coupon (Canada only). 0 0 ram oea co LIMTTY01), Orllfla. Ont. ileritlemen: Please tend mo prepaid 0 0 0 0 NARA • armeasss 0 fffff • 0. I, • fff WL 0 4.1n.W.W41...*04.1.*4.**44,4‘..eopl•.,atigointlh4 10 ft. lengths of °TACO Folding Pence at $1.86 per 10 ft. length., Moues, Order for 0 teencloced. 0 0 00 0 ISSUE 19 1955 earning $1,000. a week as the "greatest juggler on earth" did he attempt a reconciliation. He sent home a letter and ten dol- lars. In later years he had a man- sion in Hollywood with the usu- al lavish swimming pool. But he could never be persuaded to use it. In fact, he shuddered violent- ly every time he saw it. The reason was that in his teens he had got his first pro- fessional engagement as a jug- gler and drowner—or, rather, "drownee"—on an amusement pier in Atlantic City, New Jersey, for ten dollars a week and cakes. The pier charged no admission to see Fields and the other artists, but made its profits from the sale of sandwiches and beer. When business was good Fields juggled. When it was bad he "drowned": that is, he would fall off the end of the pier and 'pretend he was drowning in order to draw a crowd. The "rescue' would be carried out by a fellow -artist. a sword - swallower e Saved, Fields would be carried into a bar and rolled on a barrel while barkers urged sandwiches and beer on the on- lookers. When he was hailed as the greatest comedian in the world, W. C. Fields presented us with a heavy, belligerent, pompous fi- gure with a fruity alcoholic nose. As he would sometimes admit, the nose was not made-up but had been acquired with the help of whiskey and gin bottles. Once Fields and his booking agent, Billy Grady, were lavish- ly entertained with Irish whis- key by a friend. They left their host's Long Island (New York) home at four o'clock in the morning in Fields's car, In the back of the car were several quarts of whiskey—a parting gift. Their minds were hazy but they had an idea it was snowing. When their minds cleared, a tropical sun was shining in the hotel window and palm trees were waving before their eyes. Fields was relieved to lean that Grady saw the palm trees, too. They rang the bell and the wait- er surprised them with the news that they were In Ocala, Florida. Worried, Fields hurried to look at his car; there wasn't a scratch on it. The perfect timing that had enabled Fields to juggle anything—eggs, boards, cigars, hats canes, frying -pans, dishes, shoes, flat -irons, cigar boxes—did not desert him when he was driving a car. Deep in his cups, Fields could juggle five ivory balls. • Once during his juggling act his hat and his cigar dropped together by accident. Without any excitement, Fields caught both and juggled them along with the rest and in good time restored hat and cigar to their proper places. This got such a good laugh that Fields from then on made it part of his act. Fields got on well with all the other performers on the same bill—with the exception of what the profession calls "fly -catch- ers!' These are comedians who get their laughs by grimaces and pretending to catch flies and other insects. Fields used stage properties to get his laughs, and he got them by building up sus- pense gradually. One night Fields found the audience was laughing at the wrong places during an act in which a billiard table and cue were the props. Eventually, he found a comedian called Ed Wynn under the table, catching flies. "I'll kill him if he does that again!' stormed Fields. -• - Wynn took the hint for some time. (Fields had punched an- other "fly -catcher" for much the same thing.) Then one night in Boston, Fields found the laughs coming at the wrong time again, and he caught Wynn at his "fly - catching" under the billiard table. Enraged, Fields brought the cue down on Wynn's head. Wynn fell on his face with a loud groan and the audience howled with laughter at what they thought was well -panned eoinedy business. From time to time Wynn would let out a low howl to the huge delight of the audience. Fields later incorpo- rated this episode into his act. Difficult in his. last years, Fields took to ainbushing his closest friends. But when he died on Christmas Day in 1046 they took a full page In Memori- am notice in a Los Angeles pa- per. It ran: "To the most prejudiced, hon- est and beloved figure of our so-called film colony. We loved hint — and. peculiarly — he loved It would upset Fields if he could know of his missing thousands of dollars. But he would have the last haugh any- way—at all the trouble he's been causing his lawyers. All 1 know is What 1 read tn the papere. Roger& 1•141,.....1•1• ..1,..,1••••••••••• THY CALL IT "UNICYCLIST"—Solernn-faced Terry Bociurkiw has never seen a creature quite like the skinny, many -limbed one one on the wheel, and who has? Called simply "Unicyclist," the modernistic statue by Raymond Finak was shown at the outdoor sculpture exhibit. The conventional statue in the background and the stone dice player at right doesn't seem to interest two-year- old Terry. How Can I ? Q. How can 1 remove the time deposit from a teakettle? A. This is caused by hard wa- ter. If the kettle is aluminum or iron empty it and heat it cau- tiously and slowly. As the heat expands the metal the deposit will crack and can then be- re- moved. If there is not much de- posit it can sometimes be re- moved with vinegar if allowed to stand in the kettle until the lime dissolves. Add a little salt to the vinegar. The deposit is dissolving if little bubbles ap- pear. Q. How can 1 make a good solution for cleaning painted walls? A. Use 1 cup of kerosene, 1 cup of vinegar; 1 cup hot water. Ap- ply with a cloth, ;then wipe thoroughly with another soft cloth. . Q. How can 1 avoid frosting that runs? two coats Of floor paint, 24 hours apart. After this, use one or two. coats of waterproof varnish, Q. How can 1 give a fluffiness to blankets? A. After washing and drying woolen blankets, whip them with a carpet beater. It will make the wool light and soft again. Q. How can I remove spots from wall paper? A. If dry bran is rubbed on the spots it will absorb a good deal elf the greaseand dirt. Grease spots can also be removed by us- ing blotting paper, placing over the spot and placing a warm iron over the vapor- Do not have the iron too hot. • TABLE TAL elawt AActtiews. , Believe it or not, Out the cook- ery experts for a big manufac- turer of cooking oil have come up with a recipe for a no -roll pastry which is made right in the pie -plate. No mixing bowl — no bread board — no rolling pin — sounds incredible, doesn't it? This pastry is said to be quick and easy to mix; .they do say that it never gets tough, never shrinks, never balloons and al- ways stays crisp no matter how moist the° filling All you do, for a single crust, is sift into a pie pan these dry ingredients: 11/2 cups sifted flour, 11/2 teaspoons sugar, and 1 tea- spoon salt. In measuring cup, combine 1/2 cup oil with 2 table- spoons cold milk; whip with fork and pour all at once over flour mixture. Mix with fork un- til flour is completely dampened. Press evenly and firmly with fingers to line bottom of pan; then press dough up to line sides and partly cover rim. Be sure to press dough in uniform thick- ness. To flute, press dough lightly with fingers. Do not use a high, fluted edge. For baked shell, prick entire surface of pastry; bake at 425° F. 12 minutes, or until lightly browned. Cool before filling. For eambaked shell with filling such as custard, pumpkin, or pecan, bake at 400° F. for 15 nainutes, then reduce to 350° F. and bake until crust is lightly browned and filling tests done. According to the lady who sent it to The Christian Science Monitor this cake recipe is "al- most fool proof and the cake is delicious even if it falls." It's easy to melte, requires no frost- ing, and keeps well. FRUIT COCKTAIL CAKE 1 cup flour 1 teaspoonsoda 1 cup sugar 1 cup fruit cocktail (small can) 1 egg 1 teaspoon vanilla • V-- -•- es" 1,42 cup nut meats Drown sugar Sift soda with tious. Add sugar. Add other ingredunits ex- cept brown sugar and mix well (it is not necessary to heat). Pour into greased pan Sprmkle brown sugar over top. Bake 25 or 30 minutes at 350° F * Sweet potato pudding is con- sidered a real delicacy. You and your family will probably like it too, and here's now to make it. SWEET POTATO PUDDING 1 egg • 3 cups grated raw sweet potato Ya teaspoon cinnamon 1/4 teaspoon each, cloves, all- spice, and salt 2 cups milk 2 cups brown sugar tablespoons melted butter Beat egg slightly. Add other ingredients and mix well. Pour into a butaered baking dish. Bake at 325° F. for 45 minutes, or until well browned, stirring occasionally. Serves 8. * e Now that we're "down south" - here's an ancient recipe for corn.' bread easy to make and. I might add, with the proper • ape. eompaniments, very easy to eat. And enjoy! CORN BREAD 1 egg Ye cup sugar 1/2 cup yellow corn meal (scant) 1 cup flour 2 teaspoons baking powder 1/2 teaspoon salt 1 cup milk 2 tablesnoons shortening, melted Sift together corn meal, flour, salt, baking powder, and sugar. Add egg and milk and stir quick- ly until well mixed. Stir in shortening. Pourbatter(it will be rather thin) into greased pan and bake at 400° 1'. Every addition to true know- ledge is an addition to human power. —Horace Mann. A. Add a half 'teaspoonful of !' baking soda to the boiling frost- ing and it will keep it from run - er) ••• • :717013' unno***..."'.7rfflYIT:it tje happiness rings from oderation louse :•-'GOETHE (1749 - 1832) f Seagram, of tomorrow practice moderation today 747 carpet wrong SI e tdq7'1111 1,•••••••261•1•3.•••••••••••.•••••••....•••••••••••• 014.111.4ts is half The fun when you go 'tor a retested, fan -filled crossing or the Continent to Britaise go Cunard! 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