HomeMy WebLinkAboutZurich Citizens News, 1958-03-26, Page 4PAGE FOUR
ZURICH Citizens NEWS
WEDNESDAY, 'MARCH 26, 1958
SUGAR and SPICE
(By W. (Bill) B. T. Smiley)
"A politician", my great-uncle,
Mountain Jack Thomson, told me
when I was a little boy, "is like
a pet .pup. When he wants some-
thing, he fawns all over you: When
you pay any attention to him, he
'runs around in circles, yapping
:and chasing his tail. But when he's
:supposed to be guarding the hen-
house, he's curled up behind the
stove, asleep."
*: a, *
There was something else in
dere, about always malting a mess
tow somebody else to clean up,
but I guess I was too young to
'understand it.
a, * q.
Of course, anyone can qualify
as a wit by making sarcastic re-
marks about politicians. Person-
ally, I've always despised this as
a cheap practice. I think politic-
ians have a tough row to hoe.
Even though some of them would
be a lot more useful with a hoe• in
their hands,, in somebody's turnip
patch, than doing what they are.
* * *
But don't forget those long,
weary sessions in the House, where
they have to hang on every word
of a debate with exhausting keen-
ness. Except when they're reading
the paper, of course, or out hav-
ing a smoke, or down in the cafet-
eria, or over at the Chateau. Laur-
ier, having a snort with some of
the boys.
* *
Andthink of those awful week-
ends. Sometimes the press of pub-
lic business won't let them get
away from Ottawa until Thursday
afternoon. Then there's the long,
dreary, free, train -ride home, trap-
ped in some smoky (first-class coa-
cfh with a lot of fellows telling vul-
gar stories, smoking cigars and
drinking whiskey: That's pretty
hard on the nerves, I can tell you,
after the quiet•of the House.
But however rigourous is the lot
of the politician at Ottawa, im-
agine how crushing it is far him
when the session ends, and he has
to go home and live like the rest
of the peasants. No more jolly
sessions with fellow members in a
French restaurant in Hull. No
more impressing the delegation
from the home town with his easy
familiarity with "John", "Mike"
and "Paul".
*
Instead, he's got to go to church
every Sunday, march in the Legion
parades and attend all the fiftieth.
wedding anniversary celebrations.
He must charge about the riding,
from one stultifying banquet to an-
other, telling the same pair of
tired jokes at each. His ear is
bruised and tender from listening
to demands for new docks, new
UPPORT GOO GOVERNMENT
FOR A GREATER CANADA
IDIEFENBAKER'S DYNAMIC PROGRAM GUARANTEES
A BETTER LIFE FOR ALL OF CANADA'S PEOPLE—
SOLID PERFORMANCE—NOT EMPTY PROMISES
Old Age Pensions and other Social Security
Payments increased to help the many who
need state assistance. A revised system of
Social Security under study.
Tight Money Eased to aid business and
. industry; $300 million in new money
to aid housing.
A healthy agriculture based on
guaranteed annual prices set in
advance of the crop season; an end to
dumping foreign farm products in
Canada's home markets.
k, vast program of Public Works to
provide needed facilities and to
ease unemployment.
3 A new deal giving added funds to
the Provinces, in turn aiding the
municipalities and helping the
farmer and the home owner.
3b Unemployment Insurance benefits
extended, especially to ease
seasonal unemployment problems.
Income Tax reductions b,ene .p
41/2 million taxpayers;,'i OO,coo
Canadians in lower tax brackets
'taken o the tax rolls,
4 A huge program of natural resources
development launched to dev 'ou
new industries and to crn,aie -..
,of thousands of new jobs.
"Leta me tell you that as long as
I lead the Government of this
con mil- no one will suffer. I know
the needs of the humble, the
arerage Canadian. I know their
ambitions, their hopes, and their
frt'(ing.s".
1'riinc Minister Diefenbaker
MONDAY, MARCH 31
VOTE PROGRESSIVE CONSERVATIVE
uv
HURON
VOTE
AVTIPOVIZIO VT TNI( PId9Oa SRIPI CO SIIYAT{MI PARTY 9f CANARIA
post offices 'and old -age pensions
for people who aren't too sure when
they were born. He is tapped for
a ticket on every raffle in the rid-
ing and is touched for a ten-spot
by every ' organization in whose
vicinity he finds himself.
* a, *,
And when his course is run,
what is left for this willing work-
horse, this servant of the people?
Sheer ingratitude is his lot. He
faces three alternatives, all equ-
ally horrible. He goes on pension,
a miserly $3,000 a year, which will
scarcely keep him in the cigars
he has grown accustomed to. Or he
is hoisted up to the Senate, where.
he must labour and sweat over
legislation until he drops dead.
from sheer exhaustion at the age
of 88. Or he loses, an election, and
has to start making an honest liv-
ing again.
# * *
Oh, my heart goes out to them,
these public-spirited men. But a
few vital statistics have emerged
from the 1958 election campaign
and we must face the facts. Here
they are.
If all the politicians who are.el- •
ected spent one-quarter of the
time, energy and enthusiasm on
the affairs of the country that
they have spent in being elected,
Canada ,would be top nation in
the world within five years,
* *
If all the power that has been
poured into hearty handshakes in
this campaign could be transfor-
med into electricity, we could turn
Niagara Falls off for a month,
and never miss it.
s:*
If al] the political promises
made in the past six weeks were
stacked on top of each other, a
fellow could climb the pile and
board Sputnik as it went by.
* * *:
And if all the politicians in
Canada were laid end to end,
they might not be as long as the
Trans -Canada Pipeline, but they'd
produce twice the flow of gas.
D popular breeds
BABY
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