Zurich Herald, 1936-12-10, Page 7�.� Sio� NAtf voU11D
Lyons & Co. (Canada) Ltd., Toronto B Montreal
Stuff and
Nonsense
4111/111.1•1010/4111•111•MM011.11•OMMIMINIMMISManiSM .1•11•11,11.
The new minister was calling upon
the members of his flock.
What a cute little girl he gallantly
remarked, upon vieWing one of the
children. And this sturdy little urchin
in the bib belongs to the contrary sex
I presume?"
"Oh, yes," said the mother, "she's
a girl too.
Postman's Wife — "Why pa, you
look all tuckered out."
Postman — "1 sure am. I've been
all over town lookin' for a guy named
"Fragile."•
Never envy anyone. if they have
something you want, work until you
get something like it.
The fisherman saw what looked to
be a likely looking o• of and turned
to a man Lounging on the bank,
Fisherman — "Is it a crime to
catch fish here?"
Man — "Crime. if you catch any
it'll be, a miracle."
Nero is credited with once having
having spent $150,000 on flowers for
a banquet, which is . about $150.000
more than sone men have spent on
flowers for their wives in the past de.
code.
Life is never free of troubles —
even the fellow who lives on a bed of
roses has the thorns with which to
contend.
Many extravagances begin under
the–guise of efficiency.
Do hien like brainy women? asks
a magazine ad.
Well, every man thinks the woman
wins.) says "yes" to h'tm has brains,
but after she has lived with him a
while the woman is sure she didn't
have any when she said it.
The only efler dinner speed) ilial
is assured of a big hand is: "put it
ail one one of eclt r Brae-"
Sergeant — "Yorl'r, late to go on
•mem.,c.easw...c4
RADIOS $TO AND UP
oRW DIREC'1 iron] Gautury Distributor;
IJ save as nigh as 50% ort list prices.
timed for particulars and photos. All
standard makes. State oattery or electric.
Battery radios $12 up — Electric radios
$18 up. Ca -Plan Radio Corp., 282. College
St„ Dept. A, Toronto.
ff
isvE
r . .2
♦
TIEelp•
sats games 2tewa'tt—
lluecoar HEATING EXPERT
Last winter was one of the
most severe ever known.
Weeks of subzero weather
tested fuels to the utmost
—and found many wanting.
One fuel came through that
testing triumphantly. That
was D. L. & W. Scranton
Anthracite which is trade.
marked—Coloured blue to
protect you against mixing
of substitution. The 'blue
coal' dealer will tell you
more about this great fuel.
Order a ton today.
6-36
k't.ard, Wot's the lista?"
•i. rivate - "l overslept and
Sergeant "In all thi:; bombard-
trent?"
Private — -'1'•d be s1eol? t.g yet if
some guy hadn't been writing with a
scratchy pen,"
It is the thinkable things of one go-
neration that become the workable
things of the next
• Grocer's Delivery Man =- You cer-
tainly have some wonderful chickens
Mrs. Stillrich. Do they lay well?
Mrs. Stillrich –. "Oh, they could,
you know,, but 1n our ftnan':iel posi-
tion of course they don't have to."
Let's start the column today with
these cheerful lines we found in the
Christian Science Monitor:
Small tent applied for a job at a
business office.
"Do you i'moke?" asked tai,. Loss.
No, sir, but I don't hind having an
ice cream cone.'
Colombia will require that 80 to
9G per cent of employes and labor-
ers in all established enterprises
shall be citizens.
BOOM ERANG
When a bit of sunshine hits you,
After passing of a cloud;
When a fit of laugher gets you,
And your spine is feeling proud;
Don't forget to up and fling it
At a man that's feeling blue,
For the minute that you fling it,
ft's a boomerang• to you.
The Open Shoe
By
A. Ringer
When a shock comes a person
s..ouid be prepared, but who was to
know that there would be four
Horseshoe Pitchers all with over 69
per cent. ringers, who would be prat
tically tied for the Dominion Cham
pionsbip.
Fred Harburn of Crom y, Ont.
after trying for seven years broke
the tie to win the cup for the first
time.
Robert "Lefty" Ferris of Toronto
Riverdale was s-cond, only 12 points
down.
John Simons, "Peer of Indian play-
ers," from Melbourne, Ont., finished
number three, only 4 points below
Ferris. John had won this event
twice before as had also George 'et
win of Richmond Hill and will have
to try again next year if h wants
to break the all-time players' record
Ji• imie Daniels of Tironto Beaches
was only 3 joints behind Simons on
the total, but played a very bad game
against him.
The finals were run in one round
robin group of six players with all
heving at feast one . loss registered
against them. Geo, Craggs, defend-
ing champion, was eliminated by Fel•
ris in Group 5 by only 2 points.
Dean McGlaughlin of Oshawa was
the most impressive of the new
crop of players. One i3 always in
terested in those from a distance, and
Jas. Rose of Saskatoon was closely
watched. He lost all his 4 prelimin
ary games, by such close scores that
you just had'to wonder bow it was
done.
After all was over they just natur
ally" had Lo have a dance, an if you
surmise that Horseshoe Pitchers do
not bother witl 'ris you better be
on haul for 1937.
Thus endeth the year when the
players pitched so many ringers that
at least 4 peg sockets were snacked
off their bases.
The boys at hieaford pitch in the
church shed all „inter and extend an
invitation to visitors. So, folks, you
see there really is a Santa Claus.
Annual production of 10,000,000
tons of coal is the aim of a five-
year program in Manchoukuo.
We will soon be able to s,te each
other by, trans-Atlantic television."
Guglielmo Marconi,
All Men Use Them
and Save Dollars
Manufacturer Wants to Introduce quickly,
Singer De Luxe Razor Blades — New
Process Latest Type Double ledge — Fin-
est, Smoothest Cutting Edge ---None Made
Better — For All New and Old Double
Edge Razors -Free Samples will be mail-
ed on request — Send 10c to cover cost
of patiking and hosting, DIRECT SALES
DEPT. W.P, Post Office 13o: 72, Guelph,
Ontario.
Here There
Everywhere
.e A brother to every other .Scout, without regard to race or creel �.
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• Thirty Scouts of the 20111 Hamilton
(Chalmers') Scout Troop spent a
week -end in Buffalo as guests of the
108th Buffalo (Kiwanie) Troop', The
Hamilton boys took with there and
presented a Union Jack to the Amer-.
can Scouts, reciprocating the gift of
an American flag presented them .a
month ago by the Buffalo Scouts.
* * *
Nearly 150 Patrol Leaders and
Troop Leaders attended tale Junior
Leaders' training week -end confer
ences held simiultaneously, at Chat-
ham, al
ham, Owen Sound and Wi lu d e urn
der the direction of Field Secretaries
Speed, Padden and Jones of Provin
cial Headquarters. All troops In the
three districts were well represented,
* * *
A live wolf, captured as a cub in
Northern Ontario and brought up by
one of the young members of a new
Wolf Cub Pack in the Mount Dennis
area of subruban Toronto, was the
unique and excitingly interesting cen-
tral figure of the organization meet.
Ing of these junior Scoots. The wolf
sat docilely on the "council rock" in
,ii centre of the council. circle while
the boys practiced their ceremonial
"grand howl." As tong as they have
the wolf the boys of the new pack
will not require the wolf head totem
,pole usually oarried by such junior
Seoul organizations.
* **
It is not often that ° a Boy Scout
't'i'ocp can report 59 per cent, of its
members as having attained, First
Class rank. This achievem nt has
been recorded by the Mb Toronto
(St. Paul's Presbyterian) Troop,
Last Christmas the 13oy Scout Toy
Atop at London made a generous bulk
shipment of toys to the Scout ToY
Shop p at Saskatoon, Sask., a Christ-
mas good turn to:help the Saskatche-
wan Scouts in meeting the heavy de-
mand for Santa Claus gifts from
needy families of that ,area who had
moved up from the dried -out areas of
the south. The London Scouts are
repeating this good turn Joh this
Christmas.
r * *
It has been announced that the
Canadian Scout contingent to the In-
ternational Scout Jamboree to be
field next summer in Holland will be
headed officially by Mr. J. F. M. Stew-
art of Toronto, Chairman of the Ex-
ecutive Board of the Canadian Gen-
eral Council of the Boy Scouts As-
so'ciation.
Behind the New Streamlines
Of the Dominion's Steam Lines
Streamlining on locomotives, according to engineers, is only
the outward symbol of the radical changes which are taking place in
railroad ttllling stock as modernization programs proceed. With in-
dustry advancing into the age of alloys, entirely new materials
which give greater strength and ruggedness are being used. In this
field, Canadian nickel as an alloying', materia] with steel is being
used in new railroad equipment througliout the whole world as well
as in Canada. An interesting historical point is the fact that the
discovery of Canada.'s nickel resources was originally made when the
line of the Canadian Pacific was being pushed through the Sudbury
district. Now, years later, the metal discovered then, is a vital factor
in the development of better rail services. - TOP, a trio of the giant
C.N.R. 6400's, reported as the world's largest streamlined locomo-
tives ,in which Canadian nickel is used extensively; BOTTOM, one of
the new Canadian semi-streamined trains in service.
Rural Teachers
Writes the Victoria Rimes:—What
of the rural teachers in Britain?
Here is a little insight into their
lot. Mrs. Margaret Wintringham, a
former member of the British House
of Commons, and now president of
the Women's National Liberal Fed-
eration, asked one of these teachers
a short time ago what her duies in-
cluded, and this, in brief, is what
she was told:
Make wills for local people.
Help choose wallpapers and cur-
tains.
Attend- and advise the parish
council.
I1elp a woman farmer.
Coach a policeman for an exatnina-
tion,
' Fill in income tax forms •
Play the organ in church.
Dust cobwebs from beams in the
village shop, kept by an olcl woman.
Serve on the women's institute
committee.
Act as secretary of the garden
show.
Organize outdoor sports.
Call to see all the new babies.
Visit the sick and the aged, and
finally, cut old people's haid—bop
and shingle.
Non -Stop Paragraph
Writes the Walkerton lerald-
Tilnes:—As the inventor of a con-
trivance for putting on tlfreshing
machines that shreds the straw and
makes it so palatable that cattle fat-
ten quickly and die happier in the
shambles than heretofore, it was
somewhat the irony of fate that
Noah Russwurm, the originator of
this boon to the stock industry and
which brought so many beasts to the
headsman's block in early life should
beeome a victim of his get -rich -
quick scheme and be brought to the
Walkerton hospital to have the ring
finger amputated fro n his right
hand . because it was so lacerated
when he removed it from the shred-
der, into which he caught it, while
threshing on the farm of his cousin,
Mr. Philip Russwurm on ruesday
morning that it was no longer good
for either use or ornamentation to
his hand.
WAKE OP YOUR
LIVER BILE
And You'll Jump Out of Bed in the
Morning Resin' to Go
Tho liver should pour out two pounds of
liquid bile into your bowels daily. if this bile
is not flowing freely. your food doesn't digest,
it ,fust decays in the bowels. Gas bloats up
youil'stomach. Youget constipated. 'Harmful
poisons go into the body. and you feel sour.
dunk and the world looks punk.
A mere bowel movement deosn'taiways get
at the cruse, You need something that works
on the liver as well. It takes those good, old
Carter's Little Liver Pills to get these two
pounds of bile flowing freely and make you
feel "up and up". Harmless and gentle, they
Make the bile flow freely. They do the work
of detente] bot have no calomel or mercury in
thein. Ash for Carter's Little Liver Pills by
mantel Stubbornly refuse anything else. 25e.
IS8Ut No. 50 — '36
D--1
111 1 z's I I r
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A BIGGER
THICKERRICHIER
\\\.+01l PWWGP
Relief Problems O1 ,.
The Unemployed To ..
•,e Investigated
OTTAWA—Arthur Purvis, chair-
man of the National Employment
Commission, announced recently the
commission had obtained, through co-
operation of the Canadian Welfare
Council, the services of Miss Char-
lotte Wbitton, the council's executive
director:
Miss Whitton, hose. services will
be temporary, Mr. Purvis said, will
make a special investigation into
the phases of unemployment relief
Problem which relates to co-ordina-
tion of Government and voluntary
agencies for relief and social ser-
vices.
Many Pilots Join
Royal Air Farce
LONDON, Eng.— Nearly 2,500
pilots who were formerly in civil life
and more than 20,000 "other ranks"
have joined the service during the
18 months that have elapsed since
the first expansion program was an-
nounced for the Royal Air Force.
Delivery of aircraft is going ahead
and formation is announced of two
new R.A.F. groups to take over ex-
ecutive control of 10 service sta-
tions. Two more stations are listed
for early opening, and "high alti-
tude" bombing ranges revealed,
The Landguard Fort range may
now be brought into general use dur-
ing the hours of daylight, it is an-
nounced. The range at Dalgety l3ay
is being converted to provide general
facilities for "high altitude" bomb-
ing during the hours of daylight, by
units using practice bombs only. It
became available for use December
1. The two new groups are styled
Reconnaissance and Training.
Bread and Cheese
Naw Come in Cans
LIVERPOOL, Eng. — This is the
canning age. In 1930 the canned
foods consumed in England ran to
50,000,000 tins. Last year they had
grown to 672,000,000 tins.
Most interesting and most success-
ful experiments have been made. To-
day they are canning bread ane
cheese and beer; not altogether, of
course, as a sort of mid-day `snack'
but each in its airtight tin as victuals
inviolable to decay until the neces-
sity of the tin-opener arises. The
successful canning of bread is very
significant, it is believed.
Gas warfare would mean the con-
tamination of food, for even the best
refrigerator is not airtight., It may
mean survival and salvation to a
war -stricken area that can rely on
such a source of supply.
M13
A superb duster of stars, the
finest one to be seen in the whole
northern hemisphere, consists of at
least 100,000 stars each bigger and
brighter and hotter than the sun
which is itself over a million times
bigger than this earth of ours.
They are all in rn pid metier, to-
gether through the heavens like a
stupendous swarm of bees in flight
through the air — a densely crowd.
ed central mass surrounded by nu-
merous stragglers scattered about
on the outside. M18, the cluster's of-
ficial number in astronomers' star
charts, sends nut 2% million tines as
much light as the sun, Yet so im-
mensely distant is it that the unas-
sisted human eye is only just able to
see it, when visibility is good, as a
faint little patch of milky light on
thee black night sky, It is so incred-
ibly far away, indeed, that a light
ray or a wireless signal, which can
fly seven times around the earth in
a single second, would need no less
than 33,000 years to travel from the
earth to this wonderful star cluster,
Goitre Prevalent
In Somersetshire
LONDON — Fifty-six per cent. of
the elementary school girls in an
area of Somersetshire were found af-
fected by thyroid enlargement —
goitre — and analysis by the Medic-
al Research Council revealed a mark-
ed and consistent deficiency in the
iodine content of the Somerset wa-
ters.
Investigation among the element-
ary echo] girls in certain villages in
Suffolk county revealed only three
per cent. of the children suffering
from goitre the waters of Suffolk
containing so much more iodine. One
marked feature of the investigation
in each county was that the milk and
pasture samples showed no signifi-
cant difference.
Germany is giving blood tests to
find out whether fast drivers are
intoxicated.
Classified Advertising
DOGS WANTED
D
OGS WANTED—WILL BUY PUPPIES OF
all breeds. Write letter with full particu-
lars, breeds, sex, age, colour. Cash prices.
Prompt reply desired, dogs for Christmas de-
livery. Bulmers kennels, 740 Guy Street,
Montreal.
STAMP COLLECTING
ILLUSTRATED CATALOGUE FREE —
United States, Canadian, British Colonials,
Jubilees, Edwards. sets. Sent. for postage or
entirely free. EMPIRE STAMP CO., Dept.
PC., Toronto, Canada.
TRAPPERS — ATTENTION
TRAPPERS—Tune up now, be ready with
Fishers course on Coyote, Fox, Wolf.
Stamp for particulars. A. E. fisher, ilolbeln,
Sask.
INVENTORS
A N OFFER TO EVERY INVENTOR. List
`i or YL'nnte•l inventions and full information
sent free. THE RAMS AY Company, World
Patent Attnrr,e}s, 275 Bank Street, Ottawa,
Canada.
STA:,IMERiNO
L TAMMERINO CORRE,OTEI'i, Write — free
helprul bonktet. William Dennison, 118
Carlton Street, Toronto,
STAMP COLLECTORS
BARGAINS
SILVER JIIB'LEI4 A, C1)MMEMU1-tAT1VES,
pictorials, Colonials, Revenues, Blocks,
Airs, Foreign, U.S.A., Precancells. Something
honestly recommended. Largo packet, arty
rents. James Shrimptnn, Wadena, Saskatche-
wan. Member Canadian Stamp Societies.
PET STOt'l
CANARIES
T_rAVE JUST rtne.Eivpin ANOTiO:R
large shipment nt t_snariee from Europe.
Write for wholesale prices. need npportunity
to melte money. Anv quantity shipped any-
where, CANARY tM I'On'rnan CO., 1 WEL-.
LINGTON ST. WEST, TORONTt
The
Shciwy how to read character
from handwriting, at a glanco
10c PREPAID
Graphologist Room 421
73 Adelaide SI W.
Toronto