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ZURICH CITIZENS NEWS
THURSDAY, DECEMBER 6, 1973
Day of the one-man bandit!
Memory is one half hour.
Before the days of traffic lights inside Ontario, there was
another form of traffic control, the "silent policeman, " on
each busy intersection - a red, round, oversize "baseball bat"
suspended from a cement base by a spring in the centre of the
road.
There was no one there to administer a fine to the driver if
the "policeman" was knocked over. Resilient fellow, he sprang
up again immediately, anyway!
The era of the parking zone arrived with hourly and half-
hourly restrictions. Next came the one-man bandits, the park-
ing meters.
All these innovations to control traffic and parking were
destined to do without the immediate presence of a minion of
the law. But human nature remains immutable.
Invariably, paking meters in Ontario are jimmied so they
won't work, or simply ignored when they do work. Many faces
are showing red in violation in many towns.
Doesn't this prove conclusively that gimmicks are an excuse
and.not an answer to law enforcement in traffic control?
But there is an answer for every single Ontario municipality,
every day, every night, in every town; the most effective
answer of all - blue uniforms.
Memory, it is pointed out, is just one half hour.
One policeman, a talking, walking not silent one, seen
going up and down any Ontario thoroughfare will enforce traff-
ic and parking laws better than any gimmick ever manufactur-
ed. (One small drop of Ink)
Birth -marriage -death!
Birth, marriage, and death are the most important events
in the average life. There's the warning in many an Ontario
town: "Watch out, you'll get your name in the paper!"
You can help it if you run foul of the police court for some
misdemeanor, but you can't help being born, or walking up
the church aisle, and your blood pressure can stand only so
much.
Though printing a birth notice is seldom a problem, many
an editor literally weeps over weddings. Now, he couldn't care
less if a "tiara of pearls around her swirls, " or if she really is
"a goddess in a bodice"...the bride's counsel writes it.
However, obituaries are still troublesome, especially so
when the country correspondent sends two in the same packet
of news, one flowery and one not.
Custom was to paint up the subject --the life beautiful gone
to its great reward. In real life Bill Smith was a rogue, John
Jones was an inebriate, Harry Hall was always on a case...
sitting on a packing box in front of the shack while his wife
took in the wash. Grand Fellows all, en passant, with halos!
All babies are beautiful! All brides are lovely! All people
who die are saints!
A life on earth is indelible, What is written about it after-
ward cannot add to or take away from what it was. If Mrs.
John Jacob's life was a fine Christian example, people will say
so.
In obituary writing we've passed from a flowery past into a
factual present.
It's all in the hands of the Great Editor, anyway t
(One Small Drop of Ink)
Christmas festivities through-
out Ontario and Canada wouldn't
be complete without an ever-
green tree. The production,
harvesting, and sale of these
trees has created a thriving
industry in the province.
The tree you choose is the
result of several years of care-
ful production by operators of
Ontario's Christmas tree plant-
ations,. Grade standards are
set by the Ministry, but they are
not mandatory.
Christmas tree producers keep
on top of consumer trends when
it comes to tree sizes and spec-
ies. While Scotch pine is still
one of the most favored trees,
cultured spruce and balsam firs
are gaining consumer acceptance
ZURICH Citizens NEWS
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HERB TURKHEIM, Publisher
Second .Class Mail Registration Number 1385 �N e
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Ontario Weekly Newspapers Association ..arillirto
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THE ENERGY CRISIS
MAY BE GOOD FOR US
It seems that in the Severities,
the whole world is lurching, as
most of us do in our private
lives, from one crisis to another.
Crippling strikes, crippling food
prices, crippling political
scandals, and now the energy
crisis, so - called.
A crisis may be defined as a
turning point. Perhaps it's time
we reached some turning points
and did some turning in new
directions.
What so many people of the
affluent post-war years don't
realize is that crises are nothing
new. Every generation faces
them, meets them, and resolves
them, somehow.
War, depression, another war,
the bomb. All these have been
universal crises in this century.
Beside those big ones, a hike in
the price of beef is less than
monumental, and even the exp-
ected energy crisis is small
potatoes. (I must be hungry).
If the energy crisis becomes
more than newspaper headlines,
and shortages and rationing
occur, it might be the best thing
that has happened to the fat -cat
Western world for generations.
We are in grave danger of
turning into slobs, physically,
mentally, emotionally and mor-
ally. Maybe we need a good
purge, in the form of a sharp
cut-back in our soft way of liv-
ing. Get rid of some of the fat,
even if it requires a surgeon's
knife.
Take a day in the life of an
average family. Someone, very
often the husband in these degen-
erate days, gets up first and
turns the thermostat up to seven-
ty. The beast in the basement
starts gulping more energy.
Our friend shaves with his
electric razor. He goes down
and gets his orange juice out of
another beast that has been
burning electricity all night,
producing nothing. Then he
flips on two burners on the elec-
tric stove, one for coffee, one
for bacon and eggs. When they
are ready, he jams some bread
into the electric toaster.
Then the mother stumbles
down and turns the burners back
on. Father drives the eight block:
to work, stinking up the envir-
onment and burning energy.
The kids waffle off to a school
which is probably burning far
more tons of coal a day than it
needs to. That school has thous-
ands of lights which are on even
on a bright day.
At home friend wife throws
the laundry into an automatic
washer which uses large quant-
ities of hot water which has tak-
en a fair amount of electricity
to produce. Then it goes into
the automatic dryer, run by
electricity. Then she tackles the
ironing, and we all know what
heats an iron in this day.
She decides to wash her hair.
Mor hot water. The she sits
under the electric dryer with
fresh coffee made on the stove
burner. At this time of year,
probably half the lights in the
house are on, merrily chewing
up the watts.
And so it goes, right across
the land, all day long. The tel-
evision set burns juice far into
the night. Advertiseing signs
pop on and eat more juice.
Industry belches its wastes and
burns energy with a lavish hand.
Right now, in our kitchen,
the electric oven is glowing red.
It will be for the next two hours.
Know what's in it? One large
potato, being baked.
Multiply the juice being non-
sumed by this one family by
about five million in Canada
alone and I think you'll agree
that we're a pretty extravagant,
even sluttish lot, when it comes
to being prodigal with natural
resources that are going to be
exhausted and can never be repl-
aced.
And I haven't even mentioned
such ridiculosities as electric
tooth -brushes and electric carv-
ing knives.
Don't get me wrong. I'm no
Spartan. I'll drive to work rath-
er than walk. And leave that
great hulking, rusting monster,
that required so much energy to
be built and burns up so much
more, sitting in the parking lot
all day.
The point is, I could walk to
work, and it wouldn't hurt me.
In fact, it would be jolly good
for me.
And I don't expect my wife
to get out the scrub -board and
wash her hair in rain -water.
But it night be roily good for
her, if she had to. Women, and
men, have too touch time these
days to sit around and worry
about their nerves.
Our fairly immediate ancest-
ors didn't have time for nerves
and ulcers. They didn't need
pick-up pills to get along.
There was no alternative to just
getting going.
They didn't need three mart-
inis 'a whet their an,,eti.>ss,
They were just plain hungry.
Nor did they need sleeping
pills to get off at night. They
were just plain pooped.
I'm not scared of an energy
crisis. It might even be interest-
ing. Anyway, I have my own
energy crisis every day, when
the alram goes off at 7.15.
That's what I call a real crisis.
Business and Professional Directory
OPTOMETRISTS
J. E. Longstaff
OPTOMETRIST
SEAFORTH MEDICAL CENTRE
527.1240
Tgesday, Thursday, Friday, Sat-
urday a.m., Thursday evening
CLINTON OFFICE
10 Issac Street 402.7010
Monday and Wednesday
Call either office for
appointment.
Norman Martin
OPTOMETRIST
Office Hours:
9-12 A,M, — 1:ir! •0 P.M.
Closed all day Saturday
Phono 235.2433 19xoteu
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Insurance
111.1000111.
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Phone 236.4391 — latish
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