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Zurich Herald, 1931-07-23, Page 7eiic.i..us! •Nlietaie M 1.1 thtrlireel:ar, s!% TAsrr Kraft Old -Fashioned Boiled Salad Dressing and you ll instantly acclaim its fresh, delicate flavour" You 11 Like its velvety texture and revel is its creamy smoothness. Further, a large 12 ounce jar sells for only 25 cents, one -halt the price you re used to paying tot this standard of quality. Try tome today. KRAF Uaglimd, Boiled Salad Dressiii Made in Cana Cheese and aVMak ot Kraft " Knights" .Meaford Flooring It's Good See your dealer It's Even Better Get our prices IT'S. THE BEST. The Knight Mfg. & Lbr. Co. Ltd.., Meaford Getting the Laughs Is Hard Task By JESSE L LASKY (Condensed from The American Le- gion Monthly, April, 1931, by The Magazine Digest.) performance of one hour, two hour; and so on. "How much would you The hardest thing for a showman charge for not playing at all?" ask: to manage is the laugh. This treacb- Groucho. "Oh, that would run into erous and indispensable factor has real money," says Chico, which i, come of the best of us guessing after what we call topping the gag. Those a lifetime in the business of entertain- lines scored one hundred per cent. anent. Pathos, mystery, thrills, tense laughs. So did the one where Groucho drama and even L pleasing combine turns to his hostess with "Do you. time of qualities that sends an audi- mind if I don't smoke?" As I write ence away with the warm glow of sat- them they are nothing to fall out o: isfaction that is the object of the the your chair about, but that is because etre are, by comparison, simple to I lack Groucho's art—which establish- execute.,es another point in this laugh-produc- There is more in every comey ing business. aituatibn than meets the eye. We canThere is less talk in the talkies now make a picture in the script and judge than there was at first . The eye with fair accuracy the ultimate possi- remains the quickest messenger to the. bilities in every particular except hu- be and the funny -bone. A great mor. This we are never certain of deal of the technique developed in the. until the long (and costly) road of silents is corning back. This centres production has been travelled and the about the art of pantomime, one of the film is shown before a payaudience. oldest forma of humor, of which Playbacks of individual scenes and Charlie Chaplin is the greates 'mod• projection room showings of the whole ern exponent. reversing English on an accepted an- swer. This is how Oscar Wilde did his epigrams, speaking, for example, of a man who had a lavish funeral as "dying beyond his means." Groucho Marx is a master of this. In "Ani- mal Crackers" his brother Chico, play- ing a weird -looking instrument, says how much he intends to charge for a "Oar R The attendant at the gas the automobile. "I have used twenty ga exclaimed the driver. "Havergil? why that's ins. and his face lighted up with a "I left home last Fall in se„ to leave the old folks but therel,was no work there. They have a 'telephone and each week 'I tai xto them. We call it our re -union day". As the stranger eased hist he said to his wife• and daught separated just as this man is or oftener by means of the to to Alexander Graham Bell!" pion Day" atioA was busy filling the tank of s of gas since I left Havergil" home town," said the attendant added interest in the stranger. xch of ;work. It was a hard pull. ar back into the stream of traffic , "I wonder how many families, are being re -united once a week phone? How much we all owe after it has been cut and made ready for release do not tell what we wish by itiever'e,111 takes an -e udicmge–that.: has come to be entertained to decide whether the laugh spot brings laughs or not. And no failure in the realm of film entertainment is more devas- The oldest and surest device of tele paatomimist is the trick fall. In the b fiddle Ageeewheirdesters-were roblig- ed to, make royalty laugh on penalty of,th their ace in the hole was the fall. Maurice Chevalier gets a laugh when he falls on roller skates in his tating than the laugh which does- t haste to reach the beautiful blonde in come off. one of his plays. Two years ago one of the finest Al]. physical comedy is akin. to comedians in filmdom made his first pantomime. Our fathers laughed at talkie. After all the time and money 'Fie -throwing, exploding cigars and d labor had been spent, the last falling bricks in burlesque. As boys an shot made and the last set struck, the film arrived in New York for a pre- project;on showing to a small and critical cluster of insides—executives, ealeslnen, bookers, theatre owners, and so on. The actor in question bad never made a failure, but we sat there in that bare projection room, without music or any of the things that ,var- nish a motion picture performance, and were dumbfounded. Not a laugh, not a chuckle. The picture was a floe. So we insiders thought. The coun- try's verdict was otherwise. That picture made two and a half million dollars. Three out of five who read these remarks say it and the chances are they laughed their heads off. And there you are. Laughter is conta- gious. You must have an audience to tell if the germ is there. levighter is a seribusiness controls s with us. On the stage a good actor his audience. He can start and end laughs almost at will. But in pictures you can't suspend the dialogue until a laugh is over. Sometimes the length of a laugh is miscalculated and either the following lines are drowned out or there is a dead spot where the laugh didn't last as long as expected. Sometimes it is necessary to cut out a good laugh in a talkie because it lasts so long that it spoils a neces- sary bit of dialogue. We never can tell for sure when, at what and how long they're going to laugh. Some comedians believe . the life of e joke seldom exceeds fourteen days, bit Al Herman's line about how to divide three apples equally among four persons (the answer is to make ,apple sauce) has been in use for eigh- t o my knowledge. Why this we laughed at them in the silents. With certain refinements they're in the talkies and will remain because their principle is as old as humor itself. So is the principle of racial ego. A funny Negro must be lazy, a Scotc•hman parsimonious, a Swede stubborn, an Irishman belligerent, and an Englishman slow to get the point—and all must misproonunce the language. Less widely known is the fact that children and animals nearly always add a light touch, and can take out some of the stiffness. It is very much simpler to make audiences cry than to make them laugh. Grief is a common denomin- ator of mankind. The difficulties which we find in producing laughter are present in the delineation of pa- thos, but in a smaller degree. Crowd reaction is not so essential to tell us where we stand. One person can usu- ally get the reactions which will touch thousands to tears. Ruth -Chat- terton plays emotional roles perfectly, because she is a perfect actress. Contrition, repentance, sacrifice, loss, compunctions of honor or duty, courage with which one takes arrows off adverse fortune—these invariably touch well -springs. One of the most effective scenes on the screen last year depicted the fortitude with which an old charwoman (Beryl Mercer) went about her homely tasks when the waif of a Canadian soldier whom she had adopted was killed in battle. But mistake me not, the volume of laughs or tears or the number of times our hair stands up over a thrill is not the standard by which the success of a picture is measured by that lion - teen y should hold and it -must -have -been- tamer of us producers, the audience. two -other' -fellows should go in eigh- Itis the glow of satisfaction that a to niQ_p J.S is more than I OOO IV'. fellow feels on the way home. No one e talkies made 'he ];untiyliii! +Ding gives him that glow, but a eom- or gag, a part of our stock in trade. h The producing companies have a corthem uy all the time, s of g iA sure fire formula is Owl Laffs .nrw o,.o twcu;. o', •Ell ROSE imb GOOD " 224 and never come down. This wouldn't be a half bad country if all the graft- ing wore left to the horticulturists. What Do You Think? Dear Colyum: "I've heard that some .husbands think their wives are regu- lar animals. Maybe these are some of the reasons: 1. She has a foxy look on her face. 2. She is a regular lit�tie monkey. 3. She is a "white elephant." 4, She is a regular old bear when out of humor.' G. Some people think she is a cat. 6. She is a regular mule for stub• bornness. 7, She has a swanlike neck. 3. Her canine teeth are prominent. 9. She is as wise as an old owl. 10. Her actions are kittenish when she is In the right humor. 11. She ie. a dear (deer). 13. She occasionally looks sheepish 18. She thinks she is the goat. 14. She keeps an eagle eye on bin all the time. - 15. She is a poor fish 16. She has a whale of an appetite. 17. She growls at hien and snap, his head off occasionally. 18. She laughs like a hyena 19. She does a lot of crowing. —A Reader of Your Columx Tramp—"Can you give me a bite to eat?" Housewife—"Have you no trade, my good man?" Tramp—"Yes. I make counterfeit money, but it isn't worth what the materials cost." A well driven golf ball leaves the head of the club at 135 miles an.hour. This is said to be only slightly faster than a golfer leaves the office. Timid Citizen (to his lawyer)—"I'm afraid of my wife. Why, she's even threatened to attack me with an axe." Lawyer—"Buhl Why worry about that? Did you ever see a woman try to chop a stick of wood?" Profession Any trade that wouldn't be necessary if people behaved them selves. 'Let's.,Send a Couple to Congress This ld World has not grown deca- dent, Why spend useless hours in re- esliorse? There's lust as ever— eoXYak .430i -801. Though most The old saying that ;,`Handsome is as handsome does"1°noel seem particularly applicable to Tir,i I, the }rls .should never, never throw Prince of Wales, who 'liar' only kisses. It's almost impossible for them to hit the object aimed at. The reporter was sent to write up much horse -sense as of it's owned by the launched the new Canadian Pacific liner "Empress of, Britain", but fol- lowed her progress with suc]1 inter- Your r Feet? Are How'A 'Poet troublets affect health and comfort• CRESS SALVE removers Corns. Callouses, foul', til wa Tee -trails quickly, easily, safely two below; the total heiglht •being One murderer out of every �ru t rub it on. the mooring• Britain Commits gtiicide after. commit - A! ]leading dihiti'g'igto or sen , the ti of T>re CStree t eOts a tIT08iES mast ting the Crime. 54 Ahrens Street tj�ept, -itch----' C)n est that he flew down from London a charity ball. Next day the editor and inspected her informally, prior called him to his desk. to her sailing from Soutbampton,,on Editor --"Look. here, Scribbler, what May 27, on her maiden voyage. iAs Ado you mean by this? 'Among the the great white ship made her slay most beautiful girls was Horatio Lu - down the Solent, he followed heryby elan Dingley.' Why, you crazy idiot! airplane; a royal send-off, indeed. Old. Dingley isn't a girl—and besides The picture shows His Royal High- he is one of our largest stockholders." ness shaking hands with E..:,'W: Scribbler—"I can't help it, That's ' Beatty, I .C., chairman and president where he was." of the Canadian Pacific Rail,ay Company, on this occasion ane :wish- "Nothing 'half-baked' ing lihn and the vessel gopd.1uclt., bination of many things, running the ""Try him with Gt)c." gaiinut of the theatre's technique as Sure enough the elephant toolz •Lite applied to the human species in search money in his trunk and put it 111 'a of recreation. box which hung high on the wall •- .;`..' "That's extraordinary,". said he Sixty-seven lifts run in nearly seven Smart ono. "Now let inc se5M1l ri� a miles of elevator shafts in the worlds take it out and hand it back n tallest building, the Empire State "We haven't taught him that Building, New York. This Mtge erec• yet;" retorted the keeper, hien War tg in- tion is 102 stories above ground and d for Lar, 600 1250 feet to p t� . Sisters Martha built the fire, Martha baked the bread; Mary roamed the fields beyond, To watch the sun sink red. Martha swept the hearthstone, Mary swept the sills; Mary spoke to all the trees And sang to all the hills. Martha's soul in order Clamoured for release; Mary's in confusion touched The quiet hands of peace. —Mary S. Heading in the New Times. ------e' A Tramcar Record Using the shilling -all -day facilities, a young Croydon resident travelled 3514 miles' in twenty-seven hours on the London tramcars. Yor Ciassiicaed Advertl�ing BABY "r5ZC-S ,BABY CtfCllS, BARRl D A��' Rocks lOc, White and Brown Leghorns, Anconal se, Assorted 9e. Pei. H. SwitzerkGranton, Ontario. Bfe: A. EXPERT KtiiAti FINISHING, 23c .4. roil. any -tire postiaid: extra prints, 80 each. Jackson Studio, Seaforth, Ont. It is suggested that motor horns be standardized in pitch on one melodious note. B sharp would be very appropri- ate from a pedestrian's point of view. WOOL : HIGHEST PRICES PAID The Canadian Wool Co. Ltd. 2 CHURCH ST., TORONTO i 6LACEADSH Don't suffer any longer from these home. Get blemishes. oz. Poxinecome Powderem al frorrr s your druggist. Sprinkle a little on the face r and the cloth, will be all1ar WASHEr AWAY. Satisfaction or money -ermined - -- PIMPLES !' Add an equal amount of cream, or sweet oil, to Min- ard's, and apply the mixture once daily. A simple treat- ment which will .,,;.r• w' 26 Clear up your skin! ___- k 1,4AED'S P "KING OF PAIN" it ■:7� -- $ Thy sive ..Prw, Ce WitOpitz Evelyn you any of (bl i-hiug) — "Darling, have preference as to the style my wedding gown?" George—"Yes, love; I want it to ' be one of the early June variety' • Tricky �. "That's a very knowing animal," said the young pian to the keeper of the elephant at the circus. "Very," was the cool reloii( "He performs strange tricks antics." "Does he?" inquired the yte eyeing the animal critically. "Surprising," replied the keq "We've taught him to put mons that box ui; there. r. i rib idea." Mrs. Newlywed—"We hadn't been married a week when he hit me with a piece of sponge cake." Judge—"Disorderly conduct. Five dollars and costs." Mrs. Newlywed (sobbing bitterly)— "And I made the cake with my own hands." Judge — "Assault with a deadly weapon—one year in prison." Character is what we stand for; re-, putation is what we fall for. We know{ a girl so dumb she was fired from Woolworth's (not adv.) because she couldn't remember tho prices. Judg- ing from the court records a lot of , men `met up with their wives when Central gave thein the wrong number. livery once in while the boy who re- , oeived all the best grades in school surprises folks by succeeding after he leaves school, A Scotchman was hay - Dag trouble with his eyes so went to the oculist one day, to see what the trouble was. The oculist told him he had sugar in his tears, and the next Morning his wife found him crying over his cereal. A tax is about the cinly thing in the world that can go up about this Nurses Wanted The Toronto Hospital for xncurablos, in affiliation with Pordham Hospital, New York Cit,' offers a Three Years' Course of 'raining to Young women, having the required education, and , e- eirens of beobming nurses, This pospi- tal has adopted the eight-hour system. The Sehooe i,uails monthly aiiow nee ave nd t aof vel- liar" exp�nsea to and from New York. 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THE GENt1JND _ FOR CONST1 r :"'I ECAC fait is Regulating Me,' she says Don't Swat Flies and stain your Walls. Hang up Aeroxon. A wider and longer rib- bon is coated with the sweetest of glue that will not dry. Good for 3 weeks' service. At drug, grocery and hardware stores Sole Alen++s NEWTON A.S':.it 56 I'root St. Lau., Toronto °`}l' TOOK Lydia E. Pinkham's j9 Vegetable Compound for painful and irregular periods. I lead do color in my face and felt draggy. "My mother told me about the medicine last summer. Since tak- ing it I suffer less and it is regulat- ing me. "My color is normal and I feel like a different woman," writes Mrs. David Thomson, 37 -9th Street, N. W., Portage La Prairie, Manitoba. Won't you try a bottle? EROXON FIN CATCHER Gets the fly every time „ ISSUE No. 29—'31