HomeMy WebLinkAboutThe Herald, 1903-07-10, Page 2SLEEPY SHEEP.
Noted instances of Sleeping in.
Oixuroh.
runt the doors 1" cried Ftather An -
vine day to the Seems on duty,
jaea okisolcved the Arcbblehop of
is asletep during bise discourse.
at the doors, the shepherd is
eep, the sheep will get out !"e
met men pa•eaph," sa.Td Sidney,
ith, "as if• they 'thought sin le to
takew out of a man as Eve was
en out of Adam, by casting him
gya'profouttd nslumber" So at any
Pthvught mot South, who, preach -
one clary' 'at W itehall, observed
g Charlers II. and several of his
nth asleep. Stooping down,
ried out to one of the delin-
tis, "My' lord, = am sorry to inter -
you, but if you snore en loud,
will wake the King,"
- elajemty thereupon awoke, and,
Ing to :his neighbor, remarked
his accutstomed good nature,
as man nmsit be made a bishop;
land me on the next vacancy."
Too Much for Endurance.
Baltimore American,
was in the courtyard of the Mil-
ian royal palace.
Yonder come the anti -revolutions
," shouted the •royal .chamberlain
a servant. "Run and call the King
ckly !"
eking a card from his pocket the
want began to spell out the name.
t was Karageorgevitch.
And yet," he said, bitterly, "they
et me to call him quickly. It
kes me sick !"
uiting the action to the word he
ew up his job. •
se Lever's Dry Soap (a powder) to
sh woolens and flannels,—you'11 like
32
The Married State.
Philadelphia Ledger.
' It always seems so strange to me
hen I hear of a saleslady marrying'
floorwalker," said the young thing
the ribbon counter.
" Why so?" inquired the sour man
the linen department. -
"• Because it's second nature for a
eslady and floorwalker to fight."
• Well ?"
:
CATARRH CURE .„tjidoleYet
is sent direct to the diseased
parts 'or the Improved. Stowe,
Heals the ulcera, clears the all
passages, stops droppings in the
throat and permanantyy cures
Catarrh and Hay FevertV.Blower
ree. All dealers, or Dr. A. W. Chase
Medicine Co.. Toronto and iinffae.
Holes in it.
"Please give me a pound of cheese,"
d Mrs. Nuwed to the grocer, "and,
ay," she added, haughtily, "I want
cod, solid cheese ; the last I got
erre had holes in, it 1" t
SCRATCHING makes an itching skin worse.
cover's Cerate allays the pain, takes out
e inflammation, cleans the skin of amp -
las and sores. Why not buy a bottle to -
ay 2
Won. the Bet.
Scottish American.
A London commercial, who bad a
ery ruddy complexion, after •'work -
ng' Glasgow, had some time to wait
or his train at St. Enoch station,
lid bethought himself of a good joke.
" What is the name of this station,
my good man ?" he asked of a patrter.
St. Enoch station, sir."
A few minutes later he met the
same porter and said :
" What did you call this station,
porter 7"
"St. Enoch's. Dae ye no' see the
name abune the hotel there ?"
Just then the train Was shunted
in, and our English friend got oom-
fortably seated in S, third-class
smoker, along with a. few more pas-
sengers of the male persuasion.
" These railway officials are about
the worst I ever came across; they
can't be civil," remarked the Lon-
doner.
• ' That's a confounded Leal" said a
Scotch farmer.
Well," said the Londoner, "I'll bet
you ten bob I don't get a. civil an-
swer from the first porter I ask a
question of,"
Done 1" replied the old' farmer.
Looking out of the carriage win-
dow he pled his "green" friend and
calling him over asked in his most
polite tone :
" Would you kindly toll me the
name of this station, porter ?''
" Gang awe', ye bacon -faced' olf3
bnffer 1 Pit yer daft held in !" was
the answer,
;Minard's Liniment Cures Colder, ete.
Betrothed Before Birth.
touring tate Middle Ages it 'was'cus-
ltoinar3i for princes and princesses to
become betrothed and married in
childhood to insure succession or pole
• itical advantages. But it was only
in exceptional, eases that unborn
children were disposed of in the salve
way', Such a case, however, is on
record. It occurred In 19.68, when
Prince Sigmund, son of Emperor
Charles IV., was barn. On his bap-
tismal day be was betrothed to
(Catherine, daughter Of the Count o1
• Naremberg. On that occasion it was
agreed that a daughter of. Charles
TV., with whom 'he expected to be
blessed within five gears, should be
imarrled to a eon of Count Freder-
, t k, of wheats it was also hoped tbat
ihle ,should so be prorviided. This is
ltlhb yotingest bridal couple on re-
,coed• The hoped-for daughter carne
to 1,9.73, the Itt,gt year Of the al-
lotted periled,. and tate in time tie-.
,bailie the were df Joh ,iii 21L, the SOti
the Catantt, twee also justified the
lerpectatiotte tef jig parents. -- St.
culls I"oert7)irspatch,
LUUI[B R AN TELLS
HIS EIPE•RIIENGE1
How.Dodd's Kidney Pais' -Quickly
Cured His Lame Back.
William. N. Baskin, of Norwood, Gives
Good Advice and Others are ;Vol-
lowing it With Splendid (Results.
Norwood, Oxit., July.' 6.—(Special)
—.William, N. Baaskin, the: well-known
lumberman and railroad contractor
of thie place, tells of an experience
With Dodd's Kidney Pills that is
bound to bo of interest to the pub-
lic generally,
"For two years," says Mr. Bask-
in, "I xvia,s laid up with Laino Back
and Kidney Disease. I would et
times become weak and have to
leave off work. People who knew
nee as lumberman and contractor
on the C. P. I. and Parry Sound
Railways knew how stele I was.
"Reading of wonderful cures by
Dodd's Kidney Pills led me to try
thein. I used t.hfree boles and aan
completely cured. 1 can say now
I have not bead any pains since I
used Dodd's I idney Pills."
Others who have .followed Mr.
Baskin's' advice' and tried Dodd's
Kidney Pills report similar results.
No form of Kidney Disease can
stand before them.
Would Be Glad to Pay.
Illustrated Bits.
Miss Frances—Don't you think
there should be a tax on bachelors'
Mr. Muchlywed=l'd gladly pay
for the privilege of being one.
ENGLISH SPAVIN LINIMENT
Removes all hard, soft or calloused
lumps and blemishes from horses ;
blood spavin, curbs, splints, ringbone,
sweeney, stifles, sprains, sore and
swollen throat, coughs, etc. Save $50
by use of one bottle. Warranted the
most wonderful blemish, cure ever
known. t
A Relation by ltiarriage.
"Children have queer idea's," said
the happy father bo'f a bright young
boy to a friend the other day. "I
don't, as a general thing, repeat the
sayings or tell of the doings of that
young one of mine, 'but l'eally ci
thing he said to me just before
Cbristmtaa is worth repeating.
•'Teethe wanted to give a present,,
to each member of the family. I en-
couraged his generous thought and
promised flim all the material aid
he might need. So he made oat the
Bart of the things he intedned to
give and applied to me for the money
to buy them. I asked to see the list
and found that the present for his
mother called for a much larger
sum than the one for me.
"Of coartsse, I agreed with hie idea
that his mother should have the
best of anything that was going,
but I was rather curious to know
Why he thought so, and I asked hian
bony it wars his mother was to get
a better present than his dad. His
answer staggered me.
SPeli,' he said, seriously, 'mam-
ma is mamma always, but you are
papa only because you married into
the family.' "—Exchange.
'•THE ONLY WAY."
There is bat one way to properly
appreciate the advantages of a trip
to New York or Boston on the
trains of the New York Central
Railway, and that is to use the line.
See your ticket agent.
Not an Edged Tool.
Annie Louise was re -arranging her
mother's work basket and found a
small gourd. She asked what it was.
Being told she inquired:
"Is that whelp you eut gored skirts
with 7f'—Little Chronicle.
No Benefit Derived,
La Rire.
Bortie--Did sou bear my rich old
uncle was dead 2
Gu ole—No. What did he leave you?
Bertie—Nothing I •
Geeete—Well, what's the good of his
being dead ?
planes
Woman.
Work
Childs
Play
With the
New Century Bali Bearing
Washing Machine
and a couple•of five year old children—
the washilig need not stand over.
Five minutes to a tubful and you will
have no use for wash boards. It clean-
ses perfectly. .•
You cannot afford to be without it.
Order through your dealer. we will
mail you a booklet on application.
The DOSWELL MFG. CO., Limited
HAMILTO1', ONT.
Lost a Good Snapshot.
Judge.
He -Look, look 1 f think that clan
out In tbe breakers is drowning !
,She—Oh, heaven 1 and I have left
ley camera at home
LONDON AND PARIS.
Differences are Strongly Mai—bad and
Are Often Opposite.
The contrasts presented by Paris
mad London . are rather amusingly
put by Felix Pejat in the Matin, of
the former cite. lee says :
"Paris does most things, with the
right fraud or at the right band
side ; London followls the left.
"Parisian' coachmen keep to the
right, those of London to the left.
Paris grows by absorption, Lon-
don by expansion.
"Paris is ' built of '.stone, London
of brick.
"Paris has high houses and nar-
row streets, London's buildings are
low: ' and its streets wide.
'Vire windows of . Paris open like
doors, those or London a la guillo-
tine..
"Paris Is eoliectivistio, it dwells
in houses which are really caravan -
series ; London is individualistic,
each family having its own House.
`'Paris has .its portior, London itts..
night key.
"Paris gets up early from its bed,
which is against the wall; London
arises late from its bed, which be
in tiie centre of thle room..
"Paris • dines, London eats.
"London said Voltaire, has 100
religions, and but one sauce;
Paris has 100 sauces and no relig-
ion at all.
"Paris is gay, London sad.
"London has too fecal soldiers.
Paris too many. T110 soldier in
Paris WG•ars blue tunic and pant-
aloons, while the London rnan-ori
war is clad in a eed coat and blue
trousers. s:
"In Paris priests perform the
marriage ceremony ; . in London
they marry themselves,.
"In Paris the married womon are
free; in London when a woman
marries she ceases to be.
"Paris has more suicides, London
more homicides.
"Paris works, London traffics.
"In Paris the street crowds fight
bykicks, in London by blows of the
fist
"The proletariat of Paris refer
to the pa.wnshrop as "my aunt,"
while _ in London they say 'my
uncle: "
BINDER TALK. •
Some of the important features of
the elasisey-Haeritr Bender are:
Folding Dividers. -No bolts or nuts
to u.ns sew. You merely release a
spring on the outside Divider and
unhook the inside • one to fold them.
A. youngster can do it easily and
Properly. The Dividers are very
rigid in their warking positions and
remain at whatever angle they are
folded over, the •conveyor canvas.
Floating Elevators -•They literally
float. The grain cannot stick • or
Choke in the Massey -Harris eleva-
tor, no matter how much it Ls
bundled.
Simple ICnotter- Caipable of ad-
justment to take ;lip, wear.
Reel—Suttee for' ',i tapelintt the
crops under all conditions of wea-
ther or land. et_:wIll pick up ;tan-
gled or laid grain and lay it neatly
on the table. It also handles long or
short grain with splendid success.
Roller Bearings throughout to
lighten the draft and make the work
easy for the horses. The beasts know -
when they are hitched to a Massey-
ELarris—lt runs so easily.
Another Pea.eelnl Blockade. .
Chicago Post.
She {indignantly)—Sir; what do yon
mean ley putting your arm around
my Waist ?
He (meekly)—Why, I—er—th.ought
you: wouldn't object.
She—Well, I do, and I'II• give you
just three hours in which to remove
s.
I was cured of Bronchitis and
Asthma by MINARD'S LINIMENIT.
MRS. A. LIVINGSTONE.
Lot 5, 1'. E. I.
I wetscured of a severe attack of
Rbauma,tism by, MINAJID'S LINI-
MENT
Mahone Bay. JOHN MADEB.
I was cured of a severely sprained
leg by MINARD'S LINIMENT.
JOSHUA W t,''i7ACH'1.
Bridgewater. ,
AF OUT THE RED- H3ADEI/GIRL
She Possesses Qualities of W hielx tiler
Darker Sister C1anittit Boast.
A champion .of th$ red-headed girl
has come to the fren•t. Not that the
girl in, question is greatly In need
of a champion. In nitre eases out of
ten she is abundantly able tee care
for herself witircett assistance from
any source. But this advice of 'the
gi'rf with the auburn beer" defies
the 'world to dispute the truth of
these five propositions:
The red-headed girl can—
1. Detect the oder of a previous
high ball further, quicker and with
more *herring instinct than any
other being on earth.
2. Nail a lie and bore deeper holes
with her penetrating eye in so 'doing
than any Other thing that has eyes.
B. Make any he acs of a liar look
like thirty cents quicker and with
less effort than any other living
thing.
ft, Break a man's morning nap and
Kastle him to build the Eire lin the
range quicker, surer and with less
back talk than any other style of
Womankind.
5. She is the only known' spedles
wvho can throw a n issle with awn-,
rate aim and wile does not maxi-
ger the ,lyes of innocent b;P-bland-
ere.
A little Sunlight Soap will dean
cut glass 'and other articles until
they shine and sparkle. Sunlight
Soap will wash other things than
clothes.
armommernislow
dB
Hint for Savin;' Aittnony.
Chelsea Gazette.
• Lawyer—You, can't get a divorce on
melt evidence as that.
Client—Ten howl am I to get rid
of heir ?'
Lawyer—Well, some automobiles
are said to be dangerous.
Minard's Liniment Cures Dipletbe-
ria,
Idabel Knows Her Business.
Puck, , •
" It Is a great mistake, Mabel, to
trifle with the affeotione of a man
who loves you by encouraging some-
one, else.
"Well, he's a little stow, Auntie. I
think lie need:s a pacemaker."
Minard's Liniment Cures target in
Caws.
ISSUE NO. 28. 1903
dors, Winslow's booteeng Svrup shoula.
always be used for Cbiidren Teething. ft
soothes the child, softens thegums cures wind
colic and is tbe boot remedy for Dlarrhosa,
�ANTlD—BRIGitT, EN E 0 G B T IC
\' young num from the farm, with good
addrose and, pluck that cannot be turned
down, eau make from $10 to $20 per week
senileg our spp,eelal•ties of recognized merit to•
the w.holosalo .aud retail merchants in the
United States on commission ; travelling ex-
penses.advanced. Address P.O. box No. 68
Hamilton, Ont,
ipROF. R. L. MULS'.ENEY'S TAPE WORM
euro is safe and sure. Write for list or
names of people cured to 48 Queen street
west, Toronto.,
Smiler
Excursions
To Rochester, 1000 Islands, Bay of Quinte,
Rapids St. Lawrence, to Montreal Quebec,.
Murrey Bay, River du Loup, adousae,
Saguenay River.
Steamers. Toronto, Kingston
alio by steamers Hamilton, Spartan
and Corsican.
Farther information apply to H. Foster
Chaffee, Western Passenger Agent, Toronto
U
x,000, LE AXLE GREASE
it Has No Equal
Manufactured only by
•• THE CAMPBELL 1 FC CO.
A GREAT FRONTIER JUDGE.
Re Sentenced 172 Dien and' 88 ox
Them. Were Hanged.
IH roam a ,skerteh: of Judge I. C. Park-
er, in Frank Leslie's Popular Month-
ly foe July, this is 'takexll:
A man who sentenced 172 crim-
inals to dea.th, • 88 of whom' were
hanged ; an upright judge, holding
sway) for 21. years aver 74,000 square
miles of tlie'most lawless territory
In the United States; a stern, just
judge, whose name became a terror
to evil doers; a very kindly; sym-
pathetic gentleman and public spir-
ilted citizen—few characters have
been developed in our west who have
Played a. morre striking role than
Isaac C. Parker, United States Dis-
trict Judge for the Western Dis-
trict of Arkansas, from bray, 1875,
to September, '18,06. The story of
him work, which is told in• an article
In Leslie's Molnthly1 for J11,1y, is as
thsilling as it is true.
Holy sternly.' he pursued his ap-
pointed task and with what aid he
succeeded in accomplishing it is
slbo'wn by the simple record that,
during his term- of office, sixty-five
Of his deputies were killed in fights
with law -breakers.
Good Things to Know.
Leather bags can be freshened by
rubbing with a cloth slightly moist-
ened with salad oil. Polish with dry
destcrs' afterward till every vestige
of oil i,s'relnoved.
The low tehoes are generally laced
tvith wide ribbon;. Red ribbon is thus
used en a. blaak•Oxford tie.
Strap effects are niuch, in vogue on
high shoes and slippers. The high
shoes may be fastetn.ed witlr eight or
nine of these Straps, en,oi: ornament-
ed with a slnall buckle in silver, gilt
or bronze. These straps have super-
seded tee colonial buckles on logy
tiers.
Whitening. tial Skin.
If a remedy is wanted to produce
Immediate and wonderful effects in
whitening the skin use taw and
olive on, heated together and
cooled. Use upon the fade when go-
ing to bed with a meek of thin old
limen or muslin put on to prevent
coming off—further protecting the
pillows by an old sb,eet thrown over
them. In the. morning a bath of
White eastile soap and water brings
the fade out pure and 'softly tinted
SUM/ fTva pep'uet[ pun ei'nj meet.
as a. ctiltdrs. This is not only the
best, but one of tbe most' harmless
and cheapest preparations that can
bo pi-ocured. -
Innocents at Home.
Life.
eerie Unsophist—They must fit these
men's clubs up very gorgeously in-
side.
Mrs. Woridley-•Why
Mrs. Unsophist•-I heard your bus -
band tell mine that 'he was playing
the whose evening on velvet.
of I.1 AWr1 I LT0 Es, ONTARIO.
For sale by all leading dealers.
Meet every requisite of the impromptu
or bot weather meal.
Potted Ham, Beef and Toon, le, Or Tongue (Whole),
Veal Loaf, nevem Ham, Brisket Beef,
Sliced Smoked Beef, Etc.
All natural flavor foods—palatable and whole-
some. Your grocer should have them.
rnng—Tho booklet "liow to Make Good Things
to Eat." Send five 2c stamps for Ltbby's big Atlas
of the World.
Libby, McNeill &. Libby, Chicago, ill.
A Cockney's Spell.
Kansas City Journal.
Jonathan—I say, Britisher, can you
epee horse 2
,Englishman—'Orse ? Why, certainly.
It honly takes a Ilaitch and a ho and
a. Year and a Ness and a be to spell
'arse.
There is more Catarrh in this section of the
country than all other diseases put together,
and until the last few years was supposed to
bo incurable. Fora great many years doc-
tors pronounced it a local disease and pre&
cribed local remedies and by constantly fail-
ing to cure with local treatment, pronounced
it incurable. Science has proven catarrh to be
a constitutional disease and therefore re-
quires a constitutional treatment. Hall's Ca-
tarrh Cure, manufactured by B. J. Cheney &t
Co., Toledo, Ohio, is the only constitutional
euro on the market. It is taken internally In
doses froml0 drops to a teaspoonful. Itacts
directly on the blood and mucous surfaces of
the. system. They offer ono hundred dollars
for any ease it fails to cure. Send for circu.
lays and testimonials.
Address F. J CHENEY & CO., Toledo, 0.
Sold by Dru gists—The.
Hall's Family Pills are tine best.
She Was Posted:
O icago News.
Say, mamma," queried Little Elsie,
"what is a stag party ?"
. Stag, my dear, is an abbreviation
of stagger," replied the knowing
mother.
Minard's Liniment Cures Distemper.
"There goes a. spanking team," ree
marked Willie Brown to Tommy
Jones as the two boys' mother walk,
ed down the street together.
It. Tells in i ,r e
"how Rin.g
If you. hope to exhibit your stock at the
Fall Pails, start now and get them in per-
fect health by using
Dick's Blood Purifier
It will helix aeon to carry off the
able rubbers..
Fifty Gents per package.
I,F EMING, 1,2If,Bs & Co., Montreal, Agents.
For sale b
tsa
ALS air Ra
1E41 D. EDDY'S
EW
INDURATED
FIBRE WARE
TU :Sr PMMLS1 ETC
all fries# claim dealers
CleET`T1irolG6 E.: rerJeee -eel