The Herald, 1914-01-30, Page 7IA1r�
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ENRLISHNIAN WITH GROUCH
SAYS CANADA. IS A GROSSLY
OVERRATED COUNTRY.
Tells of His Experiences In an En-
tertaining Way in a London
• japer.
An Englislim.an with. iI grouch
against Canada has been writing 'a
series of articles as a special com-
missioner for London Answers.
Here are a few of the things he says
about us
1 .usually shave myself, so my
dealings with the Canadian barbers
were mostly confined..te,getting my
hair cub at 35 or 4.5 cents a time.
But I had a„shave ,once. It happen-
ed at Vancouver. I went into ee big-
gish saloon just off Hastings Street.
Sitting down .in the magnificently
upholstred, revolving, tilting, and
various -other -sorts -of -tricks, • chair
I signified my desire fora shave by
drawing my hand over my cheeks
and chin. I never said it word from
start to finish of the lengthy opera-
tion of the Canadian shave. When
the operator had got through with
the various applications of the hot,
wet cloth, the kneading, the rub-
bing, the lathering over and over
again, and the shaving up and
down, without having succeeded in
giving me anything like as clean a
shave as I would get in England
for twopence; I tendered him 25
cents.
"It's $2.60,” he said, as he look-
ed disdainfully at; the O-anadivin
"bob."
"What for ?" I enquired.
"You had face massage, the vi-
brator, and 'skin food application,
as well as the shave," he replied.
"Do you think 1 mistook this
place for a beauty, parlor?" I ask-
ed, sauvely. '`I came in for a shave,
apd a shave is all I am going to .pay
for."
And the 25 cents was all he got,.
though he did offer to "break my
face" if I didn't part with $2.60.
Medicine Hat.
At Medicine Hat I stayed in a
third-rate hotel, and paid for my
room for a week in advance. On
the .second night I asked for my
key at the office, and went to my
room, but as soon as I opened the
door I saw alot of feminine appar-
el lying about, and immediately re-
turned to the clerk to get an ex-
planation.
xplanation.
"That's right," he said, coolly.
"I forgot that you had been moved.
when I gave you the key. You are -
No. 13 now."
"But why was I moved after pay-
ing for the room?" I asked.
"Couldn't help it," he said, in-
differently ; "a guy and his wife
blew in and wouldn't have 13 be-
cause it's only got a little window.
Said they .wanted a front room, so
I had to give 'em yours."
At another hotel in a small
prairie town I didn't -burn up in the
dining -room until a quarter -past
nine, having 'been out since four
taking a walk around the neighbor-
hood. The waitress and some. of the
other hotel servants were having
their breakfast at a table in acor-
ner. I sat down at ane ther`table
and waited.
An Overrated Country.
"Are you expecting breakfast?"
the waitress asked, without leaving
her seat. •
"Of course I am," I replied. • .
"Well, you can't have break-
fast!" she said, -very crossly. "The
time is from silt to- nine."
'"That's all right," I replied,
cheerfully, as " I got up and moved
towards the door. "I would rather
have no breakfast for a week than
make a pretty girl cross."
I got some breakfast after all.
And now for a few serious words
to finish up with. My whole experi-
ence of Canada, both on. this and.
previous visits, has led 'ane to the
conclusion that, from tYie point of
view of advantage to the „ town
worker, it is a, grossly .overrated
country. It is,overlabed firom many
other points of view' alto, but I
needn't grainto that here as I alai
writing primarily'"f*r'-weirkers.
My opinion 'may be summarized
in the word, "Don't!" as an answer
to the question; "Shall I 'go to
• Canada, 1"
Study Economy.
The.:.depletion of the family income
is due to many errors in food economy.
Because of lack of judgment 'excessive
quantities of food are often prepared,
and then too much food is eaten or
thrown away. More often too match
food is eaten, and an extra amount
of work is' put't'pon the .already over-
' burdened digestive apparatus, and a
whole train of disease results. Many.
kitchen stoves are better fed than
the family, because the housewife
doer clot understand the ,principles of
tlook:ngy economically,: A needless
amount of fuel is used by not planning
'the meals so as to cook' the greatest
nuMber of dishes ` during ' the time
tb,itit: much, fuel is Heeded for .some
particular work.
Doctor Said lie
Iliad Diabetes
Dodd's Kidney Pi -lis Cleared
Out Every Trace of It.
That's . Why Mr. David Illeon, .of
Nieolot Co., Quebec, Is Recon-
mending the Great Canadian
Kidney Remedy To His Neigh -
bora.
St. Wenceslas, Nicolet Co., Que.,
Jan..- 26 (Special).—"I started to
take Dodd's Kidney Pills because
the,loctor told me I was threatened
with diabetes. After taking ten
boxes I was again examined by the
doctor, and he toll me that all
trace of diabetes had disappeared."
This is the statement of Mr. Da-
vid Heon, well known and highly
respected here, and he is only one
of many inthisneighborhood who
have found a new lease of life in
the great. Canadian Kidney rem-
edy.
It is cures such as this that have
given Dodd's Kidney ` Pills their
reputation. They are now known
from the- Atlantic to the Pacific as
the remedy that never fails to cure
kidney disease, no matter where or
in what form it is found.
Dodd's Kidney Pills are no cure-
all. They simply cure diseased
kidneys. The reason they cure
backache, dropsy, rheumatism,
neuralgia, diabetes, urinary trou-
bles and Bright's Disease is that
all of these are either diseases of
the kidneys or are caused by dis-
ordered kidneys failing to do their
work.
►H ,
A NEW CLYDE RECORD.
Astonishing Figures In Shipbuilding
for 1913.
As a shipbuilding centre the Clyde
still leads the world. In the year
just ended it has far surpassed all
its previous records of tonnage and
horse power. The year 1912 was the
best ever then 'known on the Clyde,
but the year 1913 shows an increase
of nearly 20 per cent. on the work of
the previous twelve months, says the
Glasgow*' Herald. The figures are
astonishing. The Clyde yards have
launched 374 vessels with a tonnage
of 764,784 and an indicated horse
power of 1,117,490. Our twenty miles
of river have produced more than a
third of the whole new tonnage of
the world in that year. There are a
few yards in England and Germauy
that are larger than any to be seen
on the Clyde, but we have a greater
number of large and busy yards' than
are to be found in any other part of
the - world. The Clyde alone builds
more ships than Germany, and prob-
ably twice as many ships, reckoned
in tonnage as America. Here we need
only call attention to the central fact
that the Clyde's great industry has,
in the year now closing, become
greater still. The yards have built
every kind of vessel, from H.M.S.
Tiger down to a .destroyer, from the
Cunard Aquitania, largest of British
vessels, down to whole fleets of
dredgers and launches, and customers
have come from every part of the
world. It is, however, important to
note that a third of the vessels
launched, representing 70 per cent. of
the tonnage, were screw steamers, and
that most of these are cargo tramps,
the unpretentious carriers of the bulk
of the world's commerce. The Clyde
profits much by its. numerous orders
for warships, but these, after all, form
only a small part of the Clyde's work.
Our shipbuilders depend mainly on
the commercial shipowners, and the
industry is solidly based on the re-
quirements of trade, not of war. There
Is nothing abnormal in the year's
output. Though it is by far the larg-
est yet recorded it represents the
cumulative efforts of the two gener-
ations of enterprise, skill, and hard
work which • have made the Clyde
what it is.
Magic o''ic "Nerviline"
Eiids Stiff IVO, Lumbago
Any Curable Muscular or Joint
Pain It instantly Relieved
'by Nerviline.
GET .TRIAL BOTTLE TO -DAY.
You don't have to wait all day to
get the kink out of a stiff neck if you
rub on Nerviline. And you don't need
to ; go round complaining about lum-
bago any more.* You can rub such
things away very quickly with Nervi -
line. It's the grandest liniment, the
quickest to penetrate, the speediest to
ease. muscular pain of any kind.
One twenty-five dant trial bottle of
Nerviline will cure any attacieeof lum-
bago or lame back. This has been
proved a thousand times, just as it
was in the case of Mrs. E. J. Grayden,
of Caledonia, who writes: ---"I
wouldn't think of going to bed :with-
out knowing we had Nerviline in the
house. I have used it for twenty odd
years' and appreciate its value as a
family remedy more and more every
day. If any of the children getsa
Stiff neck, Nerviline cures quickly. if
it is earache, toothache, cold on the -
chest, sore throat, Nerviline is always
my standby. My husband once cured
himself of a frightful a Eack , of lune -
hap by Nerviline, and for a hundred
ailments that turn up in a large fem.
fly Nerviline Is by far the best thing
to have about you,"
WHITI-b POOH F AFtL: HS.
Slx Tried in Australia Dled or `Ware
Paralyzed,
Efforts have recently .been made to
employ whits men as pearl divers off,
the cost of ,Australia, and'l.egisletiop
for the purpose. has been adopted, in
order to more fully, open that Indus-
try to Europeans.
But It now' appears that the expei'1-
ment has been by no means satisfac-
tory. A very interesting statement, on
this subject has recently been made
by Captain Talboys, who has had wide
experience of pearling on the 4us-
traliaa coact,' He- says emphatically
that white divers are an impossibility..
He had hoped that the white man
would have proved a'success'ful diver,
burhe says that after a, very lengthy
experimeut, the idea had . been .aban-
doned.
abandoned.
The divers, six or eight of them,
who were brought to Australia by the
master pearlers from Siebe Gorman
and Co. and Kenkio and Co., sub-
marine engineers, about two years
ago, were all either dead or paralyzed.
In view of the further facts alleged,
there appears to be no scope for white
pearl divers in Australian waters. For,
as the result of a year's diving, says
Captain Talboys, the best returns of
the white dfvers did not exceed a ton,
while the average yield,of an Asiatic's
work was between four andfive tons.
Besides the Asiatic 'worked' for $10
to $15 per month, plus a commission
on the shell raised, while the white,
man received $70 per month, with a
similar commission, In addition to
which the cost of keep for the white
man was about three times that ex-
pended on the Asiatic
- e Beneficial to Both
•
"I had a long walk yesterday,"
said Boreman, as he collapsed into
a seat at Busyman's. desk.
"Take another, old man," sug-
gested Busyman, "it'll do us both
good."
PILES CURED IN 6 T 14 DAYS
Your drugeiet will refund -money if PAZO
OINTMENT fails to cure any case of Itch-
ing, Blind, Bleeding or Protruding Piles
in 6 to 14 days. 50c, ,
The man who is always boasting
of his smartness or greatness never
mentions his unpopularity.
Minard's Liniment Cures Distemper.
With a Will.
He wooed the maiden with a will
And won her, though quite old;
For in the will he wooed her with
He left her all his gold.
:..:
The publisher of the best F,armer's Pa-
per in the Maritime Provinces in writing
to us 'states; •
"I would say that I do not know of a
medicine that has stood the test of time
like MINARD'S raruxENT. It has been
an unfailing remeRY in our household
ever 'since I can remember, and has out-
lived dozens of would-be .competitors and
imitators. "
Perhaps It Was.
Angeline—"I wonder if I shall
ever catch Edwin flirting ?"
Mabel—"I always • thought that
was how you did catch him, dear."
Flowers, Fruit and Sunshine In January
and always, are to be found in California,
the ideal wintering place, reached oom-
Portably and conveniently by the Chicago,
Union Pacifle and North Western Line,
via the fastest and most direct routes,
amidst the luxurious surroundings of the
compartment, club and observation par-
lor, or more moderate -priced and home-
like Tourist car, Three splendid trains
daily—The Overland Limited, faetost train
to San Francisco;. The Los Angeles Lim-
ited, three days to the Magio City of the
Land of Sunshine, via Sa1t=Lake City; and
the San Francisco Limited. The Overland
Route offers: Safety—Speed—Scenery and
unexcelled dining car service—test it.
Rates, illustrated matter and full partic-
ulars on application, B. II. Bennett, Gen-
eral Agent, 46 Yongo Street, Toronto,
Ontario,
Mystery Cleared Up.
She walked in and banged a hunk
of yelldw" substance ea; the counter.
"This," she announced sa.rcastical-
ly, "is the soap that does the wash--
in' itself. It's the ;soap that makes
w.a.shin' a pleasure; 'it's the soap
that—"
"That ain't soap, ma'am," inter-
rupted the grocer, as he took the
substance in his hand and examined
it. "Your little girl was here yes-
terday for a half pound of cheese
and half a pound of soap. That's
the cheese.''
"The cheese 1" exclaimed the wo-
man. "Then that accounts for the
other thing. Why, I lay awake the
whole 'night wondering what made
the Welsh rabbit we had 'taste so
queer."
Giving Tier Away.
"Uncle, we want you to give the
bride away.
"Very well. I'll announce tothe
gathered assembl:y:thatshe's thirty-
two!'
Paw Knows Everything.
Wi'11ie---" ?aw, where do forest
fires start'
Paw—"In mountain ranges, niy'
son."
Highest grade beans kept whole
and mealy by perfect baking,
retaining their full strength.
Flavored with delicious sauces.
They have no omitted.
"flicks the Bucket Clean"
BlatcMord's i d Meal
As good as New Milk at half the Cost,
100ounds makes 100
Milk Substitute. gallons of Perfect
Send for pamphlet, "How to Raise Calves
Cheaply and Successfully Without Milk."
Ai Yaw` Deakss or
STEELE, BRIGGS CO., •
Toronto, Ont., Canada,
Saving.
Doctor—You should take three or
four eggs daily for a month to
build you up.
Patient—But, .doctor, I cannot af-
ford that.
:Doctor -Well, • then, you must
take a trip to Europe.
- TO CURE A COLD IN ONE DAY
Teske LAXATIVE B1tOMO Quinine Tablets,
Druggists refund money if itfaile to cure,
E. W. GROVE'S signature is on each box!
25e.
Playing by System.
"They teach the children to play
by rule now."
"Yes, a kid has to have a cook
book to make a mud pie."
Try Murillo Eye Remedy
If you have Red, Weak, Watery Eyes
er Granulated Eyelids. Doesn't Smart
—Soothes Eye Pala. Druggists Sell
Murine Bye Remedy, Liquid, 25c, 50e.
Murine .Eyo Salve in Aseptic Tubes,
e,5c, 50c. Eye Books Free by Mail.
An Tye Tonto Good for ATI Eyes that Noetl Carr
!dua'iste Ere Remedy Co., Chicago
Some people are done outcof their
money, and other are dunned.
hilnard's Liniment Cures Carget In Cows,
Trying Him Out.
Quite recently an old friend of
tlje Browns went to see them at
their new country home. As he ap-
proached the house a large dog•ran
out to the gate and began barking
ab him through the fence.
As he hesitated about opediAg
the gate, Brown's wife came to the
doer and exclaimed: "How do you
do 1 Come right in. Don't mind the
dog!-' -
"But won't he bite ?" exclaimed
the friend, not anxious to meet the
canine without some assurance of
his. personal.::safety.
"That's just what I want to find
cart," exclaimed Mrs, Brown. "I
just bought him this morning."
Always.
Somebody is always fooling the
public and malting money at it.
There is always somebody who is
predicting an unusually severe win-
ter.
Something is always about to be
done to reduce the cost of living.
There is always somebody who
will perforin the ceremony when an
eighteen -year -old -boy wants to get
married.
Somebody is always trying to get
something for nothl.ng and being
disappointed.
Something is always interfering
with our. plans to mire money.
You will Ind relief in Zola -link I
fl ease the burning, stinging
pain," stops bloodingr+ and brings
ease. Perseverance, with Zara.
•oak, means cure. Why not prove
„tris 3 4U'.Druagt8t8 awl storm -
141.16 SWANIER sox 3
Mlliard's Llnihient Gurus C0ld4,Eta. 3311), 7.
ISSUE 5—'14
AUTOMOSILES ON THE FARM.
A Necessity on a Farm of Several.
Hundred Acres.
Besides making itself indispensable
to the Canadian farmer's pleasure,
the automobile is playing an intensely
practical part in his work. A bus-
iness farmer, owning several hundred
acres, says that the oily way by which
a large farm may be suceessfuily
managed Is to travel over It continu-
ally, see that the men are doing the'
right work, and do o less of it himself'..,
By persistent touring of the farm its
needs arerecognized by him, and no
intelligent farmer who sees his crops
from day to day can fail to improve
the methods of cultivation. Between
January lst and July lst about 1,000
automobile licenses were issued in
British. Columbia. In Saskatchewan;
to July 11th, about 1,730 had been
issuer). As automobiles are sold
strictly on a cash basis these figures
indicate, first, that the automobile is
regarded as an asset by the business
farmer and as a necessary part of
the farm equipment, and, secondly,
that the country districtsekre; not efif
fering from flnanciale sttillgetl ys•
Farms are commanding higher prices,
the railroads are opening up. new
territory, and millions of acres are
being brought under cultivation. These
enormous changes, combined with,'
good crops, have brought a feeling oe
security, and many farmers are fol-
lowing their neighbors' examples by
purchasing automobiles for the farm.
Proved by the Proprietor.
Stranger (in a grange restaur-
ant)—` `Look here, waiter, I can't
eat this stuff. Take it back and
bring me something decent."
Waiter—"Sorry, but that's the
best we can do."
Stranger—"It is, eh? I'll show
you. Where's the proprietor ?"
Waiter—"Gone out to lunch."
Looked Like Intended Suicide.
The citizen who was brandishing a
fierce looking razor says • it wasn't suicide
hut corns 'he was . thinking about. Need -
lees to say his wife bought him Putnam's
Corn Extractor and hid the razor—very
wise, because Putnam's cures in 24 hours;
try it, 25o. at all dealers.
Conservation.
"Oh, Ethel, why don't you use
yottr finger bowl ?"
"What's the use o' wastin' this
good jam, mother, when I can lick
my fingers?"
Minard's Liniment Cures Olphtherla.
Use for Moving 'Pictures.
One of the good uses for moving
picture films isfor recording historic
events. Not long ago the King of
Roumania organized the production of
a film of no less than 2,000 yards in
length, this being a reproduction of
the Roumanian -Russo-Turkish war
which determined the independence of
that country. The film will be kept
in the archives of .the realm. In
order to carry this out, the army lent
8,000 men in uniform, with arms and
baggage, led by officers. Another case
is that of the Italian Government,
which is collecting all the films taken
during the war in Tripoli. In Eng-
land •the same thing is done for the
films of the king's coronation events.
HACKING COUCH OF TWO
MONTHS STANDING
Cured by Na-Dru-Co Syrup of
Linseed, Licorice and Chlorodyne
You know how hard it is to get rid of
a cough that has hung on. for even two
weeks, let alone two months. So you
will appreciate what Na-Dru-Co Syrup of
Linseed, Licorice and Chlorodyne did
for Mr. Patrick Holland, of East Baltic,
P. E. I. He says :
"I suffered from a Backing cough for
over two months. I tried several reme-
dies, but they failed to cure me. At
lastI tried Na-Dru-Co Syrup of Linseed,
Licorice and Chlorodyne, and got such
relief that I tried more, and after using
three bottles was absolutely cured."
The unique, scientific combination of
three such reliable remedies makes Na-
Dru-Co Syrup of Linseed, Licorice and
Chlorodyne the best preparation that
that has ever been offered for all sorts
of colds and coughs. Get a 25c or 50c
bottle from your Druggist and seS for..ise B q e
yourself how effective it is. National :send uesine
Drug and Chemical Co. of Canada, ,w suall
Limited. • 323
R
en flan
Fine RAI
1
and Ok
Lorsbai d
dor two year
lams. 4b 1
r•
ive up'xnyyi
. 3ny Urmii
`l19d:4ee
t�i,iae' I':wau
.�>L,ri. t'
fetsd'•'Itiitt
Jkfuw+th6' ad,
3ittlev/0/4;
telief froze:
bawds In wi
and dried 0,
the Cutiow
them with.'
the Outlaw
Soap MCI isi
and they r
Mrs. Releni
A single
of Cuticnrs
when all els
and dealers
each audio''
Address po
Corp„ Dept
'F{
H. W. OAW1
Toronto.
Ti' YOU W
1. Fruit, St(
write A, W.
Colborne St-,
14. W. DAW
NEW:
- RAE R
W
paper
tarts towns
as subseriptt
Ing. Wilso
west Adelai
vTRAWBE
Varietie
d: Son. Gro
ANCEE,
14J interna
out pain by
ns before t
Ori., Limited
1CTANTE s
Yv and
or spare ti
distance; c
for par ticul
Company, M
wrottir
Or GUITAR
;t To i
owor
m„}st.mo,T2
> mAn, riot
PrP.,ein plv.ryoa
Hs So maty o¢
%oalst *aorta to firs
OCfMb'SPOIISEIIC
DO YOUR
from wast
Do the ch'
IDEAL ST'
make old
wear like
feet. ease
Ing. Two
ram's. 5Cc.
YORK &
THC
'WAY
80
go
is
li
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fu
other sore
recommend
Price, 50
sale by all
If Your
oa;rrv'•.it. r
PH'U1i .. PR
HOTEL TRAYMORE
ON THE OCEAN FRONT.
ATLANTIC CATV, N. J.
L•
WKS
wee
IL
A magnificent ten -story, fire -proof addition is iu
this famous hostelry the newest and most up-to-dat
A not feature is the unusual size of the bed rooms
Every room commands an ocean view, bath at
water. Chevaigglaes in every chamber. Temperature
the latest development in steam heating. Telephon
privileges. Capacity 600. 'write tor illustrated b
CHARLES- 0. MARQUETTE, TRAYM0t2
Manager.