HomeMy WebLinkAboutThe Seaforth News, 1947-03-06, Page 7;UST IN FUN
Dictionary of Movie Pests
„udger: Gently but firmly digs
his sharp elbows into your ribs
each time the •screen ; reveals a
situation he considers too subtle for
your dull mind to grasp.
Explainer: Explains the minutest
details of the plot to his hard -of -
hearing accomplice: sits directly be-
hind you.
Paper Cracker: Frequents the
matinees. She specializes in crunch-
ing cellophane candy .bags at the
climax when screen voices are low
and tense.
Animal Crackers
"A nickel for your
thoughts."
Good Leader
The soap -box orator was warm-
ing to his subject.
"Comrades;' he cried passionate-
ly, "make me your leader and in
everything you undertake I'll be
behind youl"
Vacant Seat '
The minister had preached for
an hour and a quarter on the
prophets—all the greater prophets
and then the minor ones in turn.
"Now we conte to Habakkuk," he
said. "Where shall be put him?"
"He can have my seat," said a
wearied listener, "I'm awa' hame.
He Knows
Jiggs: "Many a man has a talent
for conversation which he has had
no opportunity of turning to ac-
count",
c-
count "
Jinks: "Um—er—yes; I ant mar-
ried myself."
Warm Time
Liz: "Yer father's in for a hot
time tonight, Bill."
Bill: "How's that?"
'Because father says they're
goin' to toast your father tonight
at the club,"
One's Enough
"\Vhat is the plural of hippopot-
amus?" asked the teacher:
There was no answer from -the
class.
"You try, Tommy," suggested
the teacher.
Tommy stood up.
"H -i -p -p -i- Oh well, who'd
want more than one anyway?" he
demanded.
The Attraction
Shopwalker: "That customer was
hanging around for a long time.
What did he want to see?"
Pretty assistant (coyly): "Ale,
sir."
Tailored Ensemble
Wendy Russell models a Holly-
wood -designed desert sand tai-
lored suit with turtleneck wool
jersey blouse, Brown saddle
belt with gold ouckle adds a
colorful touch,
Know Your Hockey Stars
By ED. FITKIN
Gaye Stewart, Left Wing
Not, since Harvey Jackson
streaked to • stardom in the. early'
30's has a. Toronto left-winger
elicited so. - much admirable com-
ment as Gay Stewart, the only
Leaf All-Star of the 1945-49 sea -
Tall, dark, good-looking Gaye
topped the N.H.L. in scoring last
season with 37 goels and fin-
ished in second place (behind
Max Bentley) in the points.
department. He had 15 assists for
a total of 52 points, 9 less than
Bentley. It was a banner year for
Gay e, despite the failure of the
Leafs to hit the playoffs and even
greater deeds are expected of him
this year.
His team-mates, taking cogniz-
ance of his speed, reached into
Dagwood's territory to nickname
him "Swish". Gaye combines re-
markable speed with robust aggres-
siveness. He has the frame to
• withstand punishing checks as he
bulls his way past obstacles. An
inch shy, of the 6 -foot mark, he
weighs 175 pounds, has big shoul-
ders, slender legs..
Stewart was born at Fort \Vi1-
liant, June 25, 1923, His Scottish
parents christened him James Gaye
Stewart. He received skates for
Christmas when he was "six or
seven" and has been using them to
good effect ever since. After star-
ring in midget hockey around Fort
William, Gaye joined Port Arthur
juniors, led the league in scoring
in 1039-40 and then came to To-
ronto. With Marlboro juniors he
t,pped the O.H.A. Junior "A"
scoring race, beating out Johnny
Holota in the last league game.
The next season was a historic one
.for Gaye and hockey.
He started out with Marlboro,
juniors, graduated to Marlboro
seniors, turned pro with the Leats,
was sent to Hershey and then
moved up to the Leafs for the
Stanley Cup playoffs. Gaye saw
only six minutes service in the cup
playoffs — but never before had a
hockey player taken the four major
steps to stardom (junior, senior,
minor pro and N.H.L.) all in one
season.
In 1942-13, his first and last full
r.H.L. season before the war,
Gaye was acclaimed rookie -of -the -
year and received the Calder
Trophy. Iit also gained the re-
spect of the whole league as a
Modern Methods
Keep Coal -Mining
Town - Clean, Neat
The industrial nerve centre of
the State of Western Australia lies
some 120 miles south of the capital,
Perth. It is the township of Col-
lie, not very big as townships go,
but Collie's 5,000 inhabitants know
that it will eventually become one
of the main factors in the post-
war development of Australia. Al-
ready, Collie has contributed 13,- .
000,000 pounds worth of coal to the
economic wealth df Western Aus-
tralia, but 'to the industrial world
it has contributed greater. I, has
proved that coal mining ai,d un-
healthiness are not necessarily in-
separable.
* *
There are no grimy particles
hanging in the air, and there is
a complete absence of unsightly
workings around the town. The
streets are neat, and clean: well
made and well kept. The people
look prosperous.
Collie owes its immaculate ap-
pearance to the fart that its min-
ing is carried on by the most oto-.,
dere methods There are seven
urines in the district, two of them
are worked by the open -cut method
and most of the others, although
underground, are completely mech-
anized,
* * *
In their spare time, the miners
work their land. some planting
orchards, others running sheep and
others gradually building up dairy
herds. Each year• now thousands
of cases of apples and pears are
exported' to the city markets: a
substantial wool clip is being
steadily increased and outsiders are
buying much of the district's but-
ter, eggs and mill:. The result has
been that Collie.' essentially a min-
ing town, itas also become an im-
portant agricultural centre.
Greenland Airfield
Negotiations are understood to
be still .in progress between the
United States and Denmark for
future American military facilities
in Greenland, and in the meantime
the American installations set up
there during the war are being
maintained. The United. States
also asked Iceland „some time ago
for consent to future American
bases .there, but Iceland refused to
agree, allowing only a' strictly
limited' use of an airfield • for
American air communications with.
the forces of occupation in Ger-
many.—The Economist, London,
rookie to handle with care" as a
result of his now famous alterca-
tion with Jimmy Orlando. Flatten-
ed by an unexpected Orlando punch
during an argument, Gaye got
even later by clouting Jolting Jim-
my on the noggin with his hickory.
Both Stewart and Orlando were
suspended and fined $100. .
Stewart scored 24 goals and had
23 assists for 47 points in his first
N.H.L. campaign. He joined the
R.C.N.V.R. in May, 1943, as an
Ordinary Seaman. Hei served in
Toronto, London,' Prince Edward
Island, Sydney, Halifax, Montreal,
Cornwallis and had a three-month
stint atsea with a minesweeper.
He was promoted to Sub -Lieuten-
ant, December, 1943, and became a
Lieutenant in September, 1945.
Stewart is a versatile athlete, ran
as a 100, 220, and 440 track com-
petitor, played fullback and cap-
tained his high school football team
to the North-Western Ontario
school championship and now
plays softball, golf, snooker and
bowling, and swims.
Last May, wedding bells rang
out for young ItIr. Stewart and his
Fort William sweetheart.
In late June, Gaye was stricken
with appendicitis; worked the lat-
ter part of the summer at Conn
Smythe's sandpit to regain his
strength.
Tea With Butter
When tea was first introduced
in England, a lot of people dis-
liked it intensely. The reason was,
that though they had heard it
praised they had no idea how it
should be prepared. Having bought
some of the leaves, they boiled
them for about twenty minutes,
strained off the juice and tried to
eat them with salt, pepper and but-
ter. in many parts of England
people still talk, though as a rule
humorously, of "making a dish of
tea."
—H.R.F., in Empire Digest.
Art of Horaetrading
Flourishes in B.C.
An amusing new version of the
old story about the community
that made its livelihood by taking
in one another's laundrycomes
from New Westminster. It appears
that members of the B.C. Horse
Breeders Association; far from dis-
couraged by the lessened demand
for horses, have taken to trading
among themselves.
A remarkable series of trans-
actions :is related by James Turner,
of South Saanich: "1 bought a
horse for 510, improved its condi-
tion, and sold it to Another man.
for $25. Needing a horse later, I
bought it back for $50, Then the
other fellow offered me $75 for it.
Again I needed it badly so I paid
him $100. Finally I sold the horse
to a thirc party for $150. My
friend, when he heard of the final
transaction, said, "Why did you
sell that horse to an outsider when
we were making such a good liv-
ing but of it?
Thus is provided heartening evi-
dence that the• old art of horse
trading, which helped to build the
West, has not been lost.
Bread in Tins
Canned bread is being tested by
the United States Army quarter -
casters. They've sent some to
Colorado where they're having
mountain maneuvers and to Alas-
ka. If it holds up it will be sent
to Europe. It's baked in 4 -oz. and
10% -oz. tins which have their in-
sides treated with heat -resisting
enamel. The tins are vacuum seal-
ed on coming out of the oven. The
bread is said to keep its freshness
and flavor.
Canned bread would do away
with baking in a field kitchen dur-
ing action. It would be a boon
to campers and to rural families
who live a way from a store sup-
ply of fresh bread. Why wasn't
canned bread thought up long ago?
,as1111111
VOICE OF THE PRESS
A Thousand Times "No"'
"That crash you heard was just
.another New Year's resolution hit-
ting the floor," $tratford Beacom -
Herald explains, We hope it was,
and not that fancy cup and saucer
Mom got from Aunt Tilly at
Christmas
Ottawa Citizen.
No Discount For Knocks
Before the recession a used -car
dealer in Hollywood advertised:`
"Don't Come In, Just Honk
Your Horn, 'We Buy By Ear."
— St. Thomas Times -Journal.
Upside Down
A famed acrobat, 30 years with
the circuses, has celebrated bit
birthday. It is reported they balced
him a nice upside down cake.
— Hamilton Spectator.
Where It Shows Up
Canada 1s a country in which it is
easier to gather a crowd to dem-
onstrate their citizenship around a
platform than around a ballot box.
— Toronto Telegram.
Baubles
Americans paid $1,300,000,000 for
jewelry last year, a new record.
— New York Times.
First Sign of Summer
Cheer upl It won't- be so long
before we have the first reports
of the peach crop being ruined.
— Brockville Recorder and Times.
Economic Alternative
Which is better—all this pros-
perity which no one can afford, or
hard time at popular prices?
—Edmonton Journal.
Lifelike Dreams
Psychologists are studying the
phenomenon of people dreaming in
color. That's nothing. A fellow
sleeps in the room above us who
dreams with sound effects.
— Windsor Star.
GIS
Usefulness of Aga
A new law in Britain require@
business executives to retire at T0.
It is rather a tribute to the old boys
that it h the only way in which
they can be forced out.
— Port Arthur News -Chronicle.
From Dough To Mud
Im the Middle Ages, women put
raw dough on their faces to im-
prove their complexions. The world
has progressed, however, and to-
day women may purchase dainty
jars of perfumed mud for the same
purpose.
— Kingston Whig -Standard.
Sad, But True
The melancholy fact about the .
occupation of Germany is that it
continues mainly because the Allies
think they dare not leave the Ger-
mans alone.
— Vancouver Province,
Don't Lead Him Astray
Don't do Junior's home -work. It
doesn't look right to ' ave hint show
up at school with the wrong an-
swers.
— Ottawa Citizen.
;fl HrjDBFN'
06,00 -UPS
DOUBLE ACT '`�
S � crnmq,
pH1ti tr PHIIIIPS' -
7111 PROVEDt�+i6oF MAGNESIA
tog
1E
/.tt DRUOSTORtS
...Foe titi1iis
74'
Every Canadian today is asking himself this questions
"How much more will it cost me to live tomorrow?"
The answer depends on us ... Living costs should not increase...
1F—we all keep on resisting the temptation to try to get more than -
our fair share of available goods.
1 F—we continue to restrict our purchases to what we really need.
1F—we keep on producing as much as we can at as low a price as
we can.
1F -we continue to support to the full our
' measures of control.
1F—we continue to .wall: the middle road, the road of moderation in.
all things—in our thanking, in -our actions and in our pleasures.
1F—as The House of Seagram has always suggested, we continue to
think of tontorroty and practice moderation today!
Government's wise
/trolv,1 is•�';I �� t 0,eze i?e ✓eeckraa.to adv./
C 1Ll
THE HOUSE OF SEAGU