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The Seaforth News, 1947-01-02, Page 8JUST IN FUN Had It A man consulted a real estate agent for a write-up of the prop erty he wanted to sell. When the agent submitted his descriptions ot the property, the owner exclaimed; "Read that again." After the sec- ond reading, the owner said: "I don't think I'll sell. I',ye been looking' for that kind of place all my life; but until you read that description I didn't know I had ,Still Going Round "Welt, did you get any surprise presents for your birthday?" 'Yes, rather. I got a book front Bill I lent you last year." Which? "Could you pay for an operation V I thought one was necessary?" "Would you think one was nec- ossary If I couldn't pay for it? Extravagant "Weel, Angus," said Donald, "I hear ye've got married?" "Ay, Donald." "An what kind of wife hae ye got? Can she cook?" "No, I don't think so." "Then whit can she do?' "Man, Donald, she's a grand singer," "Ach, mon, ye're daft," said Don- ald in disgust. "Widna a canary hae 'been cheaper?" ,Animal Crackers 'Sure, pin -stripes are the latest things." High Finance Little Mrs. Newedde was still rather shy about asking her hubby for more money, but the time came when she simply had to. "Jack, dearest," she said at break- fast time, "will you please lend me Li, but only give me half of it?" "Yes, darling," said her husband, puzzled. "But why only half of it?" "Oh, well, don't you see, then you'll owe me ten shillings and I'll owe you ten ahillings, so we'll be square, won't we?" Just That Wife (sorrowfully); "I've just received a letter from poor, dear mamma. She says she is feeling very seedy." Husband (with a grunt): "I sup- pose that means she is going to plant herself on us." No Hoarder The banker's daughter threw her arms around the neck of her bride- groom -to -be. "Oh dear," she exclaimed, adad's going to give us a cheque or a present!" "Excellent!" exclaimed the happy young man. "Then well have the wedding at noon instead of two o'clock." "Why, dear?" "The banks close at threel" Friar,- Him "I want. something really nice fbr a present," explained the shop- per to the assistant. "For your husband, madam?" "No, from my husband," came the reply, sweetly. Keep It UP "Now that I've told you about my past, do you want to marry me?" "Sure." "I suppose you'll expect me to live it down?" "Nol" r11 expect you to live up to Understand Now Visitor: Why is the church bell ringing, Sexton? Sexton: Cos I be pulling this 'ere rope, mister' In Expectation "What is a debtor?" "A 111R11 who owes Motley." "A WI what is a creditor?" "A man who thimcs he's going' art if " — • AND NO ONE WAS HURT • This big Dakota plane sits suspended at a precarious angle on houses in Northolt, England, where it crashed. Neither passengers of the plane nor residents of the houses were injured. MARY 'STILL INTERESTED IN PICTURES Despite the fact that she has not been seen on the screen for some years, Canada's own Mary Pickford is still vitally interested in movies. On the occasion of a recent trip to England, Mary demon- strated her interest by visiting the set of "Great Expectations", the movie that is now delighting audiences throughout Canada. She is seen above with David Lean, director, and John Mills, who plays the part of Pip in the picturization of Charles Dickens' great novel. RISE OF A NEW STAR A young gentleman of Great Expectations is fourteen -year-old Anthony Wager, of London, England, who was chosen from a field of over 700 aspirants for the part of Young Pip in the Cineguild adaptation of Charles Dickens' novel "Great Expectations" which is now being shown in theatres across Canada. An average boy, young Anthony had no previous stage or screen experience but gave such a tremendous performance that he has already been assigned to two other pictures. He is one of the young stars being brought forward by J. Arthur Rank, the British cinema mogul. "What's in A Name?" The modern trend has reached even into the realm of that age- old fraternity — the junkmen, says The Vancouver News -Herald. No longer may they be designated as junkmen, for at their convention in San Francisco this month they will be known as the National As- sociation of Waste Material Deal- ers. Aluminum Houses British factories soon will be producing an aluminum house every VA minutes; 54,500 will be completed by next fall; and families can move in with their furniture five hours after the house sections arrive on a vacant site. john Wilmot, Minister of Supply, gave these facts as the 10,000th aluminum house was delivered. Voice of the Press How It's Done There are two ways of acquiring old furniture. You can buy it or raise a family. --Hamilton Spectator., A Question of Shape The winning team in the cross- cut saw contest at the Royal Win- ter Fair—a couple of the boys from old Kebbec—sliced through a 21 - inch log of green maple in a min- ute and '47 seconds. It was nice going. We knocked one off last summer in an hour and 47 min- utes. But the saw wasn't in good • shape And neither were we! —Ottawa Citizen. Button Collector In his thirty years in the minis- try, an American preacher has built up a world-famous collection of buttons. Somehow 'this seems a reflection on his congregation. —Edmonton Journal. Surely Not An expert says we must produce eggs "the way we produce automo- biles." Does that mean the liens must go on strike periodically? — Brandon Sun. Wide Highways Modern highways are the kind wide enough for five cars to smash at the same lime, — Quebec Chronicle Telegraph. Costly Sneeze A sneeze, which some would ra- ther have than their breakfast be- cause of alleged benefitsto the human system, cost a West Vir- ginian some $1,250. He lost con- trol of his car and smashed into another. There's a time and place for everything—including benefi- cial sneezes, -- St. Thomas Times -Journal. HOW To Make Fortune A chemist declares that 87 dif- ferent things can be made from coal, There's a fortune for some ingenious fellow' who can make a decent fuel of it. — Chatham News. Let Her Go An English war bride returning to the Old Country because of dis- satisfaction with life in Canada de- clared that she was "homesick for the sight of an English dance hall and an English pub." That type won't he missed from this Country. --Northern Daily News. Secret Is Out A man in Virginia is 97 and has never consulted a doctor. Bet he's sick of apples! --Peterborough Examiner. Only Time For Action Old men dwell in the past, and young men look to the future. But wise men know that the present is the only time for action. — Fort Erie Times -Review. Know Your Hockey Stars It has been said that an earth- ' quake wouldn't ruffle Walter (Turk) Broda—and that isn't far from the truth. `. The happy - go - - away from the ewaifi on waset lumindercky,L NHL, for tivo seasons and most of a third, is back RS large es life and determined to W. Grolta)l Broda regain possession (Turk) )f the Vezina rrophy. He's the only Toronto netminder to ever win that award. 5 1 * Broda, who was born at Bran- don, Manitoba, May 15, 1914, got his hockey start in and around that section of the province. Like nine out, of ten goalies, he had the net - minding assignment thrust upon him, He wanted to play defense but he was too small and it was goal or nothing. So Turk guarded the.hemp. That was around 1929 and 1930.1 By 1933 he had made such strides that he had migrated to Winnipeg to play for the fam- ed Monarch juniors. He was also placed on Detroit's list and in 1934-35 he was workout goalie for the Red Wings. Chuck Gardiner, then acclaimed • as the greatest goalie in hockey, was Turk's idol and he gave the chubby Polish boy some pointers that helped his play con si derably. * 5, * In 1935-36, the hockey fates started to work for Turk. He be- came regular netrninder for De- . troit's minor pro team, the Olyrn- pica, and it was during that sea- son that Conn Smythe invaded Windsor Arena on a scouting -for- a -goalie mission. Smythe was there to look over Earl Robertson — but he wound up with Broda, who stole the show. The Turk became Toronto's custodian in 1936-37 and remained as such until he joined the Canadian Army in the summer Of 1943. His most successful season was 1940-41 when he won the Vezina Trophy in rather dramatic fashion. The Turk seemed to be sitting pretty for the netniinding award with only four games left to play that season. He had yielded Only 87 goals and was seven up on hiS closest rival, Johnny Mowers of the Detroit Red Wings. But . • . in the next game, played in New York, Broda had one of those nightmarish experiences. Rangers started throwing pucks past him early and often and the Turk couldn't do anything to stem the avalanche, Rangers won the game 8-5, and instead of having the Ve- zina Trophy tucked away, Broda was one goal behind Mowers, with each having three games left. * Turk yielded three goals in his next game, Mowers two. That put Johnny ahead, with 90 goals against Broda's 98. In the next game, Turk held Chicago to one goal, while Mowers was allowing Boston Bruins two. So with one game left, Mowers was ahead, 98 to 99. The Leafs' final game that season was in Chicago—and Turk rose to the challenge to blank the Black Hawks, 8-0. Detroit's final game was not played until a couple of days later — in Boston. Mowers, with one game to go, still had a one -goal edge on Broda. That night the whole Leaf team—including a fin- gernail -biting Turk — watched the duel for they were in Beantown waiting to start their playoff se- ries with the Bruins. And that night the Bruins smote down the Wings, 4 to 1 , . , and an ecstatic Broda left the rink as winner of the Vezina Trophy by the dra- matic margin of 95 goals to 102. In addition to winning the covet- ed cup, Turk was also picked as the league's all-star goalie for 1040-41. He had five shutouts that year. * * The season before all that hap- pened, Broda had given indication that he had become a big league goalie . .. for in 1908-39 he finish- ed the 48 -game league grind with a 2.229 goals against average, yield- ,,„/ ig• dnuce1d07eigmlatrkseirlisi toatliltstolIdn, allot .pplarym, off gables that year, he kept up his stellar puck fending and was beat- en only 20 times. He also came up with another pair of shutouts to malce his total 10 for the season. After winning the Vezina In 1940-41, Turk kept up his good work in the ensuing season. In 48 games he conceded 136 mak and. . was runner-up to .Frank. Brims* and also the second all-star team's goalie. In the • memorable playoff battle with Detroit that year, Turk proved his mettle when he stepped intd the Motor City and blanked the Red Wings in the sixth game of that epic series, He had racked up six,shutouts in league games— but that was the only one be notch- ed in the playoffs. It couldn't have come at' a. more propitious' time— • for the Leafs Went on from there to take the Stanley Cup in the greatest comeback of all time, * * * Turk was runner-up to Mowers during the 1942-43 season, giving • up .159 goals in 50 games—au av- • erage of 9018 per game, That sum- mer he went •into the Canadian Army and the sante year waled up overseas. He served 'in . Eng- land and Holland and • catr,le through unscathed, his only inbir„, ries emanating front sports corn - 'petition. Playing in a softball gaiiie," he tore ligaments in bis ankle slid- ing into third base and spent Con- siderable time in the hospital. Then, just before returning to Canada, 'Turk stopped a puck with his mouth in a hockey game, lost several teeth. In England, he played 'hockey with the 23rd Field Artillery and later with the 4th Division Artillery team which won the championship. In his first 10 games, Broda scored nine shutouts. and in an 11 - game league schedule he conced- ed only two goals, Erode is married and has three daughters . . . Barbara, Bonnie, and Betty. He worked at Conn Smythe's sand pit during the past summer and also polished up on his golf game, which is the envy of his Mates. Rural Journal Says Communism Enemy of Farmers About Communism there is much that Americans do not know. We do know. that Conununists want to destroy our form of government. They hate our way of life, says The Farm Journal, Chicago. Why they desire so intensely to uproot a system that has accom- plished so much, and why they are Willing to work so furiously to create confusion and disturbance, are mysteries to most of us. Communists persistently worm their way into farm organizations, push into radio and publishing, sneak into govermnent jobs—every- where with the same vicious in- tent. Always the purpose is to create and fan discontent and dis- satisfaction. Whatever is against a stronger United States they are for. The Communist takes advantage of every crack in the armor of Americanism. He is for strikes be- cause they slow up production. He is for big spending because it weakens the nation. He agitates for government to take care of everything, because he knows that government bungling gets discom tented groups to play his game. He never rests. He will even support some things that are right, because he specializes in fooling well-meaning honest Americans into aiding his effort to make chaos. If you catch hint at any of his tricks he screams that you are a red -baiter and a dirty Fascist, plot., tang to fool the common. people. One thing Americans do. know about Communism. It is a treason- ous enemy for which there' can be only one treatment: That is to recognize its ideas. and acts, and stamp them down ruthlessly. REG'LAR FELLERS—Strong Come -back 00"-- WHATCHA A INVENTION...- , GOT TH' DUFFY YHERE? RETURNABLE SNOWELkIL! INSTEAD OF MAKIN' A LOT OF SNOWBALLS .$ NAFTA BR ONE' -TA' RUBBER' BALI INSIDE PERMITS IT T'eiOUNCE BACK AN' YA CAN RECOVER IT WITH .SNOW -- By GENE BYRNES ME ---I PEIVER• 114 KU -1D *THAT' • STICKS5flCKiTOTh“ TARGET --- LIKE 'THAT ONE! tel.v.v7e - ...0etve ."rlftiotriek • AMEMMEMMEMMW''”